words in movies
Monica: Theres still so much to do. Have you written your vows yet?
Monica: (handing him a pad of paper and a pen) Lets just do it right now. Okay? It wont be hard. Just say whats in your heart. (She goes back, sits down, and starts feverishly writing.)
Chandler: (watching in her) (in his head) Look at her go! She must love me more than I love her! Whats wrong with me? Ooh, dont open that door.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica has hit a writers block as Rachel and Phoebe enter.]
Monica: You have to help me! Im supposed to be writing my vows and all I have is this! (Shows them what shes been working on.)
Chandler: All right, theres a nuclear holocaust, Im the last man on Earth. Would you go out with me?
Phoebe: Well maybe you dont talk about your feelings back then. Maybe you just say something about yknow all the things that hes taught you. Like (They all try to think about one example and dont succeed.) Or all the things you taught him.
Monica: Now everybody knows the basic erogenous zones. (She starts labelling them) You got one, two three, four (Chandler is shocked to find out theres more than three), five, six, and seven!
Chandler: (shocked) There are seven?! (Points to one) Thats one?
Monica: Its kind of an important one!
[Cut to Ross leaping into Chandlers Hotel room in London in The One With Rosss Wedding.]
[Cut to Chandler opening the door to his and Joeys apartment to reveal Monica standing there with a turkey on her head in The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks.]
[Cut to Chandler entering his and Monicas apartment alight with a thousand candles in The One With The Proposal.]
Monica: Chandler In all my life I never thought I would be so lucky. (Starting to cry.) As to fall in love with my best my best Theres a reason why girls dont do this!
Ross: Hows Monica coming along with her vows?
Phoebe: Well lets just say its shes lucky she has a sweet ass, cause shes not so good at the writing.
Phoebe: Well lets just hope it works. Yknow nine out of ten marriages end in divorce?
Ross: Phoebe thats not true.
Phoebe: Yeah, youre right. Hows the Mrs.?
Joey: I know! I mean its not like we werent cool about it.
[This starts a series of flashbacks starting with Monica and Chandler forcing Joey to keep his new found knowledge of their secret relationship in Monicas bedroom in The One With All the Kips.]
[Cut to Phoebe in Rosss new apartment looking at Monica and Chandler and what theyre about to do in The One Where Everybody Finds Out.]
[Cut to later in that episode. Rachel and Phoebe are going to a movie from Monica and Chandlers, and as Phoebe walks by Chandler she pinches him on the butt and exits.]
[Cut to later in that episode. Monica and Chandler are confronting Joey in his apartment about Phoebes knowledge.]
[Cut to later in that episode. Phoebe is telling Rachel in Monica and Chandlers that Chandler wants to make a date with Phoebe.]
[Cut to later in that episode. Chandler is in his bathroom with Monica, and hes panicking on how far Phoebe is pushing him.]
Phoebe: Yknow, youre friends getting married, its gotta change things.
Chandler: Whats going on?
Joey: Yeah, you can get a Volvo. If thats what you really want.
Monica: Oh thats so sweet.
Monica: Yeah, I dont hear Chandlers and he doesnt hear mine.
(They spilt into their sexes and the girls read Monicas and the guys read Chandlers. The girls gasp and groan and the guys laugh hysterically.
Phoebe: (To Monica) Oh, thats beautiful.
Joey: (To Chandler) (laughing) Funny one! Thats good!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Ross and Joey are reading Chandlers new vows.]
Chandler: I stole Monicas and changed the name.
Phoebe: (to Robert) Youve have lipstick right here (points to her cheek). Thats okay, its mine, we just kissed.
Chandler: Hey Pheebs, whats up?
[Scene: The Hallway, Phoebe walks up to and knocks on Chandler and Monicas door.]
Joey: What? Whats going on?
Chandler: Okay. 1 2 3Go! (Once again hes at a stalemate, but this time hes in pain.) (Pause) Im gonna kill myself!
Joey: Oh thats amazing. (Drops the sheet.)
Joey: What, oh, oh, oh, no, no, I cant, I cant tell you that, its like the most awful, horrible thing Ive ever done my whole life.
[Scene: Monicas birthday, its just after the surprise.]
Joey: Hey Ross! The babys kicking!
[Scene: Chandler and Monicas, Chandler is sitting at the kitchen table eating cheesecake. The box it came in is also on the table.]
Phoebe: Oh thats good, the chemistry thing for us too.
Joey: I dont know. Ooh, I bet its Richard.
Ross: No! For all I know, shes trying to find me but couldnt because I kept moving around. No, from now on, Im staying in one place. (He sits down on the bed.) Right here.
Joey: Yeah. Yeah, that thats exactly it. Youre right. Yeah.
[Scene: The museums worker cafeteria, Joey is eating lunch with the rest of the tour guides. Another tour guide tries to sit down in a seat Joey saved for Ross.]
Carol: What that woman... did. I am not doin that. Its just gonna have to stay in, thats all, everything will be the same, itll just stay in.
Ross: What? Why? Whats wrong?
Rachel: Yeah, everythings fine!
Joey: Hey uh, whats with the candy?
Ross: No really, you tell me whats up.
Phoebe: No, okay, youre right. Youre easy-going. Youre just not as easy-going as Rachel. Shes just more flexible and-and mellow. Thats all.
Chandler: Thats a good idea.
Monica: Whats going on?
Joey: Whats going on?
Joey: (To Rachel) Its like me when I was born.
Rachel: Whats up?
Chandler: (The room is filled with flowers and a floral print sheet on the bed.) Oh my God. What is th its like a guy never lived in here. Look, youve got to be careful. This girl thing is dangerous. (Looking around the living room.) Its spreading already.
Joey: What are they doing out here? The coasts all the way over there. (Points to the coast, meanwhile there is coast behind him.)
Joey: No, Rach, I shouldve told you sooner. Its just that Man! That kid is going to town! (Joey makes his awkward exit.)
Chandler: Okay, so thats it, everybody knows! Its official, were moving in together. No turning back. Are ya scared? Are ya?
Monica: Well its just umm Im afraid you might mess it up.
Joey: Okay Rach-Rach-Rach look at me, look at me, everythings gonna be fine, trust me. Okay. Take my hand. Here we go. (Rachel grabs his hand.) Oww crushing bones!
Phoebe: Thats it. Just relax.
Ross: I think Chandlers gone. (He hands her the note.)
Stu: So, tonights the night of the big bachelor party?
Ross: Hey, whats behind your back?
Chandler: Happy Valentines!
Chandler: Woah, woah, thats not pretty!
Monica: In the beginning where yknow its all sex and talking and sex and talking and
Joey: Okay, so thats another five hundred. Five hundred and five hundred, thats (Pauses to figure it out.)
Mr. Zelner: Its kind of a risky joke Tag, and what is-what is this drawing I cant figure out what this is?
Monica: Honey, whats going on?
Joey: Yeah, its for the kids. To keep the kids off drugs. Its a very important issue in this months Playboy. Im sure you all read about it.
Mona: I think its interesting.
Eric: Oh, mostly fashion, so there may be models here from time to time, I hope thats cool.
[Scene: The Hospital, Ross and Rachel, whos in a wheelchair, are arriving in the waiting room for the maternity ward.]
Joey: Hes breathing!
Joey: (slowly turning and glaring at her) Shes not even cold yet!
Ross: I think shes lonely.
Mona: Okay, but its Valentines Day!
Joey: No-no! I used to get paid for all kinds of medical stuff, remember? Lets see uh, well I dont want to donate sperm again. (To Ross) I really prefer doing that at the home office yknow? (Ross nods his head.) Ooh-ooh, maybe they want like some of my blood or-or spit or something, huh?
Monica: Shes right of course not. Honey, get the tape.
Monica: Its still beautiful.
Monica: Thats different, we were roommates! And when?!
Joey: Hey, whats up?
Chandler: Oh, its so hard to care when youre this relaxed.
Ross: Hey, hey, its me. Why cant you tell me?
Joey: Its nothing.
Ross: Shes not a Tribbiani?
Joey: Okay, uh sit down. (they do) Um theres this woman that I like. A lot. But, uh it cant happen.
Joey: Yeah, hes the best.
Joey: Its Rachel.
Phoebe: Well not clients, lovers. But lets just yknow, try it again. Come back and-and well work through it.
Phoebe: Oh no, I dont believe in Western medicine. No, if you just apply pressure to these points right here. (Shes pinching the bit of skin between her right thumb and forefinger with her left hand.) Then your hand starts to hurt and you still have a headache, so thanks. (Takes the pills.)
[Scene: Ross and Rachels. Rachel is standing in front of the TV holding a video.]
Monica: Thats not true, there are great pictures of us!
Joey: Yeah, hes the best.
Joey: Its Rachel.
Joey: Why wouldnt ya? Erin is great! Then-then theres you guys.
Ross: Rachel whos carrying my baby? Rachel?
Rachel: (To Phoebe) Well, whats he like?!
Phoebe: Well hes tall.
Phoebe: Well last night, I met Monicas.
Phoebe: Obviously, and hes British.
Rachel: Oh, its so sad they never had a chance to meet.
Phoebe: All right well lets see, Ross is a good father, but Joey has a boatThis is hard!
Ross: Hes not?
Joeys Sisters: (entering) Joey!!! Happy Birthday!! (all 7 of them look almost identical)
Joey: Okay thats the green stuff talkin.
Chandler: Cheese you say? Thats some pretty smelly work, huh Don?
Rachel: Joey? Whats up?
Rachel: Okay whats up?
Phoebe: Okay, so Im done my part, okay. Its your responsibility now, okay. The burden is off me, right?
Monica: All right, whats going on?
Joey: Okay umm, I just came by to tell you that I want to have dinner with you tonight. Thats all.
Ross: All right Pheebs, your cabs ready.
Joey: Well, I guess youre right. Maybe, maybe Ill take her down to the incinerator. Its gonna be so said, and kinda cool. (He goes to remove the back, but it doesnt come off. So he sits down in it, puts his feet up, stands up, and looks back at it.) Shes heeled!
[Cut to Monica and Rachels as Ross walks through the door. Rachel is holding the chrome star and crying.]
[Cut the hallway, Rachel is exited from Monicas when the door closes on her skirt.]
Waiter No. 2: Whats the matter with them?
Monica: Whats up?
Conan: Matthew, you have a reputation with the rest of the cast that sometimes you like to, you like to fool around a bit. I mean like if somethings naturally going wrong you like to get in there and juice it a little bit. True or false?
Ross: Really?! (To Rachel) Hey, yknow what? Since you have such a great sense of what I need, uh ooh, heres-heres 60 bucks, why dont you take Phoebe down to that Colonial flea market of yours and get me some stuff.
Leslie: (singing) My best shoes, so good to me. I wear them everyday. Down at the heel, holes in the toes. Dont care what people say. My feets best friends, pals to the end. With them Im one hot chicky. Though late one night, not much light, I....
Monica: Yeah, but I love you more. Besides yknow, nothing goes with Bing. So Im screwed. I mean (Rachel hands Emma to Monica.) Oh, hi Emma. Yeah, thats you. Youre our little Em. Oh whats that honey? What? Oh, you want a little cousin? (To Chandler) You want a cousin right now?!
(She holds the phone out and starts taunting Phoebe. Phoebe calming knocks the phone out of Rachels hand and catches it.)
Ross: Thats okay, Ill just pick em off.
Ross: Thats my favorite shirt! Okay? I love that shirt!
Matt: (noticing the laughter) Why? Whats the matter?
Chandler: I know its tough now, but things will get better.