words in movies
Part 1 written by: Shana Goldberg-Meehan & Scott Silveri Part 2 written by: Marta Kauffman & David Crane Directed by: Kevin S. Bright Transcribed by: Andreina, Eleonora, Pheeboh, Sebastiano & Vanessa
Ross: Thats it. Thats it.
Mr. Geller: I think I accidentally used Monicas boxes to keep the water away from the Porsche.
Monica: Rosss parents are my parents!
Joey: And-and theres no danger to her and the baby?
Mrs. Geller: (Looking around at the chapel.) Oh my God! Its like a fairyland.
Nurse: Hes in room 816.
Monica: Thats true! (Happily) I knew I married you for a reason!
Rachel: Come on, its not a big deal! We stayed up all night coming up with a plan so that us dating will not be a problem.
Rachel: Okay-okay-okay-okay-okay-okay-okay! I got it! I got it! I got it! I cant! I cant! I cant! I cannot go with you and my sister thing. Okay? I just cant. Its just too weird, all right? I imagine the two of you together and I freak out. It freaks me out. I cant do it! I cant do it.
Joey: (looks in the window) Hes not really my type.
Ross: Well lets just say (singing) Rosss caaaaan!
[Cut to later in that episode. Monica and Chandler are confronting Joey in his apartment about Phoebes knowledge.]
Monica: Okay, Joeys gonna catch it, and you and I are gonna block.
Nurse: (calling to the woman) This rooms available.
Ross: And yet somehow its true!
Dina: I cant believe shes really gone. Look around you, all of this is ours. (They move into kiss but; theyre stopped by Joey entering with a huge bandage wrapped around his head.)
Ross: (To Rachel) Squeeze your legs together and cover the babys ears!
Joey: Uh, well hes 33.
The Director: Okay. (to Alex) All right uh, Alex now when Joey says his line, "Take good care of your Momma son," thats your cue to cry. Got it? (Alex nods yes.) All right, lets do this.
Rachel: Oh, its a tattoo! Thats weird, Phoebe doesnt Wait thats Ursula! Thats not Phoebe that is Ursula!
Janice: Its you. This is yours.
The Fireman: Please reattach this, its against the law to disconnect them.
Rachel: Ooh, I miss dating. Gettin all dressed up and going to a fancy restaurant. Im not gonna be able to do that for so long, and its so much fun! I mean not that sitting at home worrying about giving birth to a sixteen pound baby is not fun.
Cliff: Oh my God! Thats the doctor who was in my room before!
Cliff: That-thats him! You know him?
Rachel: I know! I know, she says its all mass-produced, nothing is authentic, and everyone winds up having the same stuff. (Ross looks at his table.) So come on, shes gonna be here any second! Can we please just cover this up with something?! Please?
Rachel: Oh, shes so tiny. (Starts crying) Whered she go?
Ross: Oh shes shes perfect.
(The band starts to play, and the recessional starts. Ross tries to take Emilys hand, but she snatches it away from him.)
Monica: Oh my God! Its like one mind.
Joey: Whats the matter now?
Monica: Whats the matter?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica is trying to erase Chandlers dirty words while he looks on.]
Frank: MY SISTERS GONNA HAVE MY BABY!!!!!!!
Monica: Its okay honey, youll find a name.
Monica: Okay. Its Emma.
Monica: Its clearly an Emma.
Chandler: (giggles) My friends name is Joey.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment, Joey and Phoebe are reading a scene from Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E.]
Ross: Yeah. Shes putting her down now, thats her. (Points to the nurse putting Emma now.)
Ross: Its its complicated okay?
Phoebe: Okay, you guys. You guys I think I know whats going on here. Okay, you guys STOP!! (They stop.) I know that, I know that youre acting mad because you think that itll make it easier to leave. But deep down youre still really sad. Deep-deep down.
Rachel: Hes perfect, hes never been better.
Rachel: Okay, you guys, just relax. (She goes over to open the door, and as she does, she says.) I doooo. (Sees that its Joshua, not Chandler that knocked on the door.)
[Cut back into Rachels room.]
Chandler: Nooo!! Shes really dull! And she gets this gross mascara goop thing in the corner of her eye!
Ross: Hey, wheres uh, wheres mom?
Evil Bitch: Shes in labor! You like that you sick son of a bitch!
Pete: I want to become the Ultimate Fighting Champion! Its the most intense physical competition in the world, its banned in 49 states!
Joey: Yeah uh look Rach, theres something I gotta tell ya.
[Scene: Rosss apartment, he and Emily are addressing their invitations.]
Joey: I dont know! Maybe shes crazy! (Storms out.)
Mr. Waltham: Well theres one (pointing towards Jack) and theres another (pointing towards Judy).
Ross: Its mine.
Monica: Damnit! Damnit!! Heres your fifty bucks! (Pays Phoebe.)
Monica: Well, thats okay dad, we-we can wait until later.
[Scene: Chandlers Office Building, Chandler is walking by the elevators and sees Bob standing there.]
[Scene: Rachels Room, Monica is entering.]
Chandler: Joey, you have to tell her whats going on! And what did it look like?!
(Theres a knock on the door and the Nurse enters carrying Emma.)
Ginger: Its okay if it bothers you. Really. I mean the only thing I need to know is: How much it bothers you? because I dont like wasting my time. Am I wasting my time?
Rachel: Shes perfect.
[Scene: Rachels Hospital Room, Ross is sitting next to Rachel.]
Joey: Hey so wheres Ross?
Monica: (to Ross) Honey, its not pushy, he gave her his home number.
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Phoebe, Monica, Ross, and Rachel are watching Emma sleep.]
Phoebe: You know thats thats her.
Chandler: (not knowing what hes saying yes to) Yes.
(Chandler smiles and nods then realizes what hes agreed to.)
Rachel: Ugh, those bastards! Lets go.
Chandler: We cant do that thats insane. I mean A he could wake up and B yknow, lets go for it.
Rachel: Yes okay. (Checking the speed dial again.) Well now see this isnt telling us anything. (Reading the speed dial) Joe. Carlos. Peter. Ooh! Peter Luger! T hats a steak house!
Phoebe: Yeah, okay lets leave these two alone.
Ross: Actually that-thats not true, in The Incredible Hulk uh, No. 72, Dr. Bruce Banner found (Sees everyone staring at him and stops.) Yknow, ugh, nevermind, my girlfriends a lesbian. (Leaves.)
Monica: Okay. Could the waiters gather around to hear tonights specials? Okay, first there is a Chilean Sea Bass prepared with a Mango relish on a bagWhy is nobody writing these down?
Monica: I know, thats why I said again!
Monica: Okay whats up
Monica: Whats going on?
Chandler: (sarcastically shocked) Really?! Joe? What would you do if you were in Rosss situation?
[Scene: Ms. McKennas Office, Chandler enters.]
Ross: Oh! Oh! Shes upside down but shes coming! Shes coming!
Phoebe: No thats what you do when you want to get the truth out of someone.
Phoebe: Hes miserable! What happened to him?
Will: Thats right, The I Hate Rachel Green Club!
[The next one is from Episode 608: The One With Rosss Teeth, Chandler is accusing Joey of becoming less of a man.]
Ross: Yeah thats what she said.
Chandler: Its not a real game! I made it up!
Rachel: Yeah! I dont think youre going to need it though. Okay, check this out. If its a girl, Rain.
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Ross enters.]
[And with that, we go into another set of clips, this time from Rachels point of view.]
Monica: Hello? (Listens) Oh yes, one minute please. (To Phoebe) Its for you. Its the fire inspector.
Ross: Well, I tell you what. Why dont we uh, why dont we just stay here? Lets not see a movie, well just hang.
Monica: Thats my old dog. He passed away years ago.
Chandler: Ooh! Yes! Okay! Heres what we do, we-we forget it happened.
Joey: I saw this movie once where there was a door and no one knew what was behind it, and when they finally got it open millions and millions and millions of bugs came pouring out and they feasted on human flesh. Yknow it wouldnt kill ya to respect your wifes privacy! (He walks away and into his apartment and looks the door.) Stupid closet full of bugs!
Ross: Ooh. What is the name of Chandlers fathers Las Vegas all-male burlesque?
Ross: Rach, come on, if you think about it, its actually kinda funny. (He laughs, and he laughs alone.) Okay, maybe its best not to think about it.
Chandler: Thats funny, I saw no phlegm.
Chandler: Should we tell Rachel theres an empty private room right next door to hers?
Mr. Heckles: I could be Chandlers new roommate.