words in movies
[Scene: Rachel's new job, she's in her new boss's office (Kim's) and with the other assistant (Nancy). Together they're deciding what clothes to buy or something, who knows, let's all watch/read to find out.]
Rachel: I mean what if this keeps happening? Y'know, they'll-they'll be outside smoking, making all the decisions and I'll just be up in my office breathing my stupid clean air, y'know? And then when the day comes when Kim wants to promote one of us, who do you think she's gonna pick? Me or Smokey Smokerson?
Monica: Chandler! I have to tell you, you smell so smokey I have to get up. I'm not kidding. (She's not; she stands and walks away. Chandler moves closer.)
Kim: (to Nancy) So we talked about the (Chandler sneaks closer to her cigarette) whole presentation yesterday at lunch (Closer) and he wondered if one person would be enough (Closer) to get a take on the trip (Still closer) and I said, "Yeah, absolutely!" (She's interrupted by Chandler who has reached his goal and takes a drag from her cancer stick.)
Phoebe: She's a waitress.
Rachel: Oh yeah, I'm jealous. "Oh Gavin, please, please look at my ass". (Gavin starts looking) Stop looking at my ass! I mean, I just think you are totally inappropriate, ok? This is a work environment, she's your subordinate.
Ross: What? She's gonna eat all those cookies?
Joey: Uh! (When she's done she throws her bra at him)
Carol: Yes, and she's very supportive.
Ross: What?! Are you insane? This woman stole from you. She stole. She's a stealer.
Mr. Tribbiani: Her name's Ronni. She's a pet mortician.
Monica: Well, go over to her! She's not with anyone.
Rachel: For Stella! Remember? She's gettin' her grove back in like 20 minutes.
(Ross takes the tape roll she's handing him and walks to the guest room while mocking Monica's voice)
Joey: Uhh, well, she's really good in bed.
JOEY: [uses a dentist mirror to see] Naa, she's lyin'.
(She's getting closer to him, the scene fades to black.)
Rachel: Oh gosh, she's going to kill me.
Monica: I know, and she's always bragging about all the famous people she's met.
Ross: Rach, she's not going to remember this.
(Monica smiles a sweet apology of regret, until she's distracted by Marcel as he clambers all over her nice furniture.)
DR. BURKE: Ya know, she's having another baby.
Phoebe: Hey hey hey! She's on!
Phoebe: Yeah, her first day on a new spiritual plane and she's gonna come to the coffeehouse!
Mrs. Bing: She's supposed to be with you.
Ross: Now she's passed.
Ross: She was blonde? (he looks surprised for a while, but then gets a "gotcha" expression on his face... There's knocking at the door.) Just a sec.! Okay, okay. This one's name is Sandy. She's got a degree in early childhood education, uhm... she worked for her last family for three years.
Rachel: (she's sad) Ow. I don't want him to wake up alone! I should go to the hospital!
Ross: Nono, she's gone.
Chandler: Yeah, well, she's probably talking to Richard.
Rachel: I just finished getting Phoebe all dressed to meet Mike's parents. She's so nervous, it's so sweet!
Joey: C'mon, she's your mom!
Frank Jr.: Oh, no, no. Not Leslie. No, she's, she's the only one that knows how to burp the alphabet.
Phoebe: (Automatically) Yeah. Oooh... (she's sprung.)
Ross: (mimicking) Ooh, ooh. Because she's my ex-wife, and will probably want to bring her, ooh, ooh, lesbian life partner.
Phoebe: (yelling from the bedroom) Get away from that! No! (she comes into the living room carrying the phone) She's just getting dressed.
Rachel: I didnt! Even when I found out umm, all right, well let's just say I found something out something about someone and let's just say she's gonna keep it. (Goes into her room.)
Chandler: (Picks up the "Miss Congeniality" DVD) She's an FBI agent, posing as a beauty contestant.
Phoebe: Of course not! And you're gonna love Mary Ellen. She's really smart and cute and funny, and I can't tell you how I know this, but she' not opposed to threesomes. So tell me some about my guy.
Phoebe: (looking through the pizzas) Okay pepperoni, pepperoni, pepperoni, okay Ross, I know she's pretty and you love her, but is she stupid?! She forgot my vegetarian!
Monica: So she's a woman! So what?
Teacher: She's your partner.
ROSS: No, Rach, come on. Rach! Rach, no, no! She's not Rachel, she is, she is not, Ra--Rachel?
Phoebe: Maybe that's 'cause she's not really gone.
Ross: C'mon, Chandler, I love your mom. I think she's a blast.
Joey: She's still asleep.
Chandler: I know what she's talking about.
(They reach the desk. The bored nurse thinks she's heard it all before.)
(After she's left, Ross gets really happy and starts kissing the card. Suddenly, she returns.)
Joey: Yes. It's just that she's so much smarter than all the girls I've ever dated! Combined! I don't want her to think I'm stupid!
Monica: She doesn't have a stomach-ache. She's in labor!
Joey: Oh, she's putting Emma down, she'll be over in a second.
Chandler: (to Ross) I couldn't say that I was naked because she's allowed too see me naked.
Phoebe: It's too soon to tell. She's resting, which is a good sign.
Chandler: Ok, I think she's trying to tell us something. Quick, get the verbs.
Ross: Monica's crying. She's very upset about this whole Clunkers thing.
Joey: Tell me about it, huh? (Realizes that she can see Monica.) Oh no-no-no, I'm not with her, she's just Monica! (He pantomimes that out.) Ewwuck! (He pushes Monica away and makes a disgusted face.)
MONICA: I hope she's OK.
Rachel: Yes, Joey, I remember, she's annoying, but you know what she's-she's his girlfriend now. I mean what can we do?
Monica: I'm telling you, she went to the airport, and she's gonna go for it with Ross!
Monica: Oh Joey, Melanie called, said she's gonna be late.
Joey: Well look, Im breaking up with Katie so I had to put on some extra padding. Y'know? I mean, if she hits me when she's happy, can you imagine how hard she's gonna hit me when I tell her I'm taking away the Joey love?
Rachel: Yeah! That's Phoebe. That's Phoebe. You know, she just wants them all! It's like she's a nympho!
Rachel: Oh, she's coming up! She's coming up! (Turns on the TV)
CHANDLER: Whoa, she's pretty.
RACHEL: She's still with you?
Phoebe: Oh, just think... she's gonna be watching that video on a TV that hasn't even been invented yet! With friends who right now are just like babies! And they'll be living in a floating city that the humans built to escape the ant people!
JOEY: She's comin'.
Phoebe: (her mobile phone rings) Oh, it's my wedding planner. She's driving me crazy! (she answers) Hello... Hey, ok, stop screaming! Ok? So, halibut. All right, so salmon, either way. I don't-I don't... it doesn't matter to me!
Chandler: Monica says that her Maitre D. is the funniest guy she's ever met.
Chandler: And then you click it and, uh-oh, she's naked. And then, and then you click it again and she's dressed. She's a business woman, she's walking down the street, she's window shopping, and (clicks pen) whoa-whoa-whoa, sh-she's naked! (Rachel just stares at him.)
Joey: Now YOU'RE telling me I can't see her?? You guys are killing me! She's forbidden fruit! It's like ... like she's the princess and I'm the stable boy ... Why are you doing this, huh? Did Ross tell you not to let me go over there?
Ross: And where she's going everyone else'll be dressier?
Rachel: Oh, oh. (she's holding the present, a transparent bag with a white stick in it). What is this?
Joey: Yeah, but it's not gonna last. She's too much for me in bed. Sexually.
PHOEBE: I think she's OK.
PHOEBE: Because she's your lobster.
Monica: No, look, she's obviously unstable, okay? I mean she's thinking about running out on her wedding day. (Rachel slowly turns and glares at her.) (Realizing what she just said.) Okay, fine! But I mean, look at the position she's putting him in! What's he gonna do? Ross is gonna run over there on the wedding day and break up the marriage?! I mean, who would do that?! (Rachel again turns and glares at her in disgust.) Okay, fine, all right, but that's y'know, it's different! Although it did involve a lot of the same people.
Ross: Because she's just going to shoot me down. You guys saw what happened with Gunther. That did not look like fun.
Monica: She's m-i-i-ne!
Chandler: (sarcastic) Oh, she's sorry! I feel better!
MR. GELLER: Apparently, he told Johnny Shapiro that she's quite a girl. In fact, he told Johnny that he thinks he's falling in love with her.
Ross: I'm telling you, she said she's looking for a relationship with someone exactly like me.
Monica: Well, because we want to get to know her better and she's never been to New York so she wants to see all the tourists' spots... you know, Statue of Liberty, Empire State Building...
Ross: She's not here yet. She's not here. She's having my baby and she's not here.
Joey: I ended up at Ross's place. Oh, I musta missed counted or something. (Looks out the window.) Damn! She's not there anymore. Oh, l-l-look, Ross is doing his 'Watching TV' bit. (We see Ross sitting on the couch and flipping through the channels on his remote.)
Phoebe: Okay, but, well, before you say no, my friend Susanne is entering her kid and compared to Emma she's a real dog!
Phoebe: Why do you think, she's having so much fun living with Joey?
Chandler: (to himself) Too bad, she's leaving.
Chandler: Oh, she's regional Vice President; She's... just below me.
Frank Jr.: Oh, no, no, you can't have Chandler, no. No, no. She's my little genius. I got big hopes for her. She's gonna be a doctor or a realtor..
Mike: Not possible! (they kiss, and then Mike says proudly...) She's gonna be Mrs. No Balls.
PHOEBE: Well at least we know she's a woman.
ROSS: No, no, she's great and it's not like we haven't done anything. I mean, uh, uh, we, we do plenty of other stuff, lot's of other stuff, like uhh. . .
Ross: She's not even here yet.
Rachel: Um, ok, uh, oh god, um, when you and uh Ross first started going out, it was really hard for me, um, for many reasons, which I'm not gonna bore you with now, but um, I just, I see how happy he is, you know, and how good you guys are together, and um, Monica's always saying how nice you are, and god I hate it when she's right.
Phoebe: She's already fluffed that pillow... Monica, you know, you've already fluffed that- (Monica glares at her.) -but, it's fine!
Joey: Yeah, she's gonna live with me!
RICHARD: She's not a twinkie.
Joey: No, look, you know Charlie, right? She's cool, she's funny, her body is soo...
Rachel: Yeah! And she's comforted by him because she loves her uncle Joey so much.
Announcer: Get a load of this... She's proposing to him. Guess we know who wears the pants in that family. (people are laughing, while Mike still seems bewildered)
RACHEL: Oh, no, no no. I meant that he's gonna be paying that other woman beause she's a professional.
Mindy: Now, I know things've been weird lately, but you're like my oldest friend in the world... Except for maybe Laurie Schaffer, who I don't talk to anywhere, 'cause she's all bitter now that she lost the weight and it turns out she doesn't have a pretty face. ....Okay, I'm just gonna ask you this once, and I want a straight answer.