words in movies
Chandler: It is going to be perfect. I am taking her to her favorite restaurant. Im going to get her a bottle of the champagne that she really loves; therefore knows how expensive it is. Then when the glasses are full, instead of proposing a toast Im just gonna propose.
Phoebe: If she says no, can I have the ring?
Chandler: Shes not gonna say no.
(She takes it out of her mouth and hands it to him as Monica returns from her room and this time forcing Chandler to put the ring in his mouth.)
(She goes into the bathroom.)
Ross: Im sorry, its just one of my last nights together before she leaves for campto be a counselor!
Ross: Uh-uhWow! Uh, I thought you guys were just like making jokes, I had no idea. What you know what? You guys are wrong. Uh yes, there is a chronological age difference but I never notice it. You know why? Because she is very mature. Besides, it doesnt really matter to me what you guys think. I mean, Im the one dating Elizabeth, not you!
Joey: Thats not what she said last night. (Ross glares at him.)
Chandler: Okay, now will you guys get out of here? I want this is to be a surprise and shes gonna know.
Rachel: Someone? I brought people. Mr. Thompson, this is Phoebe. Phoebe, this is Mr. Thompson. (She introduces them.) Hes the head of my department.
Chandler: What?! Im Chandler! (She nods towards the doorway, Chandler turns and looks) Oh, thats Richard!
(Monica smiles then acts shocked. Chandler cant believe she just did that.)
Chandler: (to Richards date) And uh, you dont have a mustache which is good. (She just smiles.) Im Chandler; I make jokes when Im uncomfortable.
Phoebe: Well, just buy the damn boat! (Shes still working her way through her tray of booze.)
Joey: (To Rachel) Hey, I was pretty close. (She just glares at him.) Uhh, so bad news. Umm, I cant buy the boat, I dont have any money.
(Mr. Thompson looks shocked and at Rachel, she suddenly starts laughing.)
Ross: Yeah, I was but uh, she was a little busy with a water balloon fight.
Ross: Yknow, maybe she is too young for me. Yknow, when I was over there and she was running around with her friends, I felt like I was a baby-sitter. I finally started to see what you guys were talking about. I dont know what to do.
Ross: Okay umm, bad stuff. Well, Im-Im 12 years older than she is.
Monica: Shes leaving for three months.
Ross: Okay, good stuff. Umm, well shes-shes sweet and pretty and
Phoebe: Its a trip for two! (She gets up and takes off her blouse-type thingy shes wearing over her dress.) Excuse me. (She walks over to table four.) Excuse me, is the person who won the Paris trip at this table?
Phoebe: Oh, en chante. (She holds out her hand for him to kiss it, but he only shakes it.)
Joey: Ahh, yes. (Pushes Rachel in front of himself so that she could do the talking.)
Joey: Are you kidding me?! Shes gonna this boat!
Mr. Bowmont: I dont think shed like that.
Rachel: Okay look, let me paint you a little picture. (She sits down next to him.) All right, you are settin sail up the Hudson! Youve got the wind in your h(sees that hes bald)arms! You-you get all that peace and quiet that youve always wanted! You get back to nature! You can go fishin! You canooh, you can get one of those little hats and have people call you captain, and then when youre old, Cappy.
Phoebe: Look, she only suspects something okay? She doesnt know for sure, so just throw her off the track.
Phoebe: No, youre too late!!! She already took out the trash!!!
Ross: (in his head) Wow! I have never had such a healthy break-up! She was such a grown-up about it! She didnt seem too immature for me! Did I just make a huge mistake?
(She throws a water balloon at him and hits him on the head and hits him again at the waist with another one.)
Chandler: Okay, okay, here she comes! (Sits on the couch next to him.) How do I look? Do I look like a guy who doesnt want to get married?
[Scene: Monicas Restaurants kitchen, shes cooking as a waitress sticks her head in.]
(She gets up and storms out. The people at the other tables are staring at Chandler.)
Phoebe: Ohh, yeah. I think his exact words were (She makes two clicking sounds with her tongue and purrs.)
Rachel: Phoebe?! Wait abut-but she just, she said that Joey was her backup.
Rachel: Ross! I just had a conversation with her, and she said that she and Joey made a deal!
Ross: Thats impossible! I mean we have had a deal for years! We-we-we shook on it, although believe me she wanted to do a lot more than that.
(She turns her head away and when shes not looking, Phoebe shakes her head and mouths, "No, Im not." Both Joey and Ross smile, look at each other, and then stop smiling.)
Monica: Nothing. (She backs away a little bit but is still in his arms and looks up at his eyes.) I dont knUmm. I dont know. Umm
Chandler: Where is she? Im not scared of you! (Averts his eyes and walks in.)
Richard: Shes not here and please come in.
Richard: Okay, she was here, but she left.
Chandler: Well where did she go?
Richard: Well she said she had to think things over.
Chandler: And what does she have to think about? I love her!
Chandler: But I am willing to offer her all those things. This was just a plan, yknow? A way to throw her off course so that when I offered her all these things, shed be surprised!
Joey: Shes gone.
Joey: Shes gone. She had a bag and she left.
Joey: She was all crying. She-she said you guys want different things, and that and that she needed time to think.
Joey: I-I did! I told her everything, Chandler! But she wouldnt believe me.
Chandler: Well where Where did she go?
Joey: To her parents I think and she said you shouldnt call her. But if I were you I would.
Chandler: (to Joey) You not gonna believe this: She lied! She tricked me into having sex with her.
(They start making out. She opens his shirt and feels inside and stops.)
Ross: Oh thank God, I thought she had two heads.
Rachel: Ohh. (She touches his arm for support and likes what she feels) Ooh!
Joey: (entering) Hey! Is uh, is she gonna be all right?
Chandler: I hope she throws up on you.
Phoebe: Oh, look! And we get these free t-shirts! (she takes a t-shirt which was on the counter)
Joey: Ah, let me see! (she hands him a pile of tissues) Damn, that's a lot of guys! Are you a little slutty?
Joey: (In a New York accent.) Fuggetaboutit. (She giggles.) How you doin?
Ross: No, she was definitely on my bed.
Phoebe: She is gonna hate me.
Rachel: Oh! Its you. (She stops doing the dishes.) Hi.
Ross: I don't know, but I.. Look, even if she shoots me down, at least I won't spend the rest of my life wondering what would have happened. Where - where is my coat?!
Ross: No! No! Oh my God. Did she get off the plane? Did she get off the plane?
Chandler: Man, didnt she like just get here?
Ross: Well, I added the 'exactly like me' part... But she said she's looking for someone, and someone is gonna be there tonight.
Ross: Well uh, yknow what? Even if she doesnt know anything, I do! I have a son. And his mother and I didnt live together, and whenever he was with me I took care of him all the time, by myself.
(Rachel kisses him, and goes upstairs. After shes gone, Ross frantically tries to find and read the Does it? part.)
Phoebe: Oh... then I overpaid. (she goes to the bathroom)
Chandler: I can't believe she can out run you man!
Monica: Yeah. I guess. (She puts more money in the bucket.)
Monica: You go back out there and you seduce her till she cracks!
Mona: Ross, we we have to be strong. Okay, I-Im gonna go. (She picks up the shirt Ross has just set down.) Can I? To remember you?
Monica: Im sorry. Im sorry. I-I should probably leave you girls alone. (She heads for the bedroom.)
The Director: Hey, lovely! Come, talk to me a minute! (she goes over to him)
Ross: Shes going in. Wait! Hes going in! Hes going in!! The doors closed! I, I cant see anything but the door closed!!
Rachel: Ross, shes gonna start getting ready soon!
Rachel: Yeah! That's Phoebe. That's Phoebe. You know, she just wants them all! It's like she's a nympho!
Chandler: All right fine, don't do anything, just sit here and talk to us, meanwhile she is talking to him about you. And he's being Mr. Joe Sensitive, and she starts thinking 'Maybe this is the guy for me, because he understands me.'
Phoebe: Oh, I missed you so much! (she kisses Mike)
PHOEBE: I know it's kind of weird, but I mean, she was a big part of my life there, you know, and now I just feel kind of alone.
(she slaps him in the face, Mike looks like he doesn't believe what just happened. Precious leaves, and he turns to Phoebe.)
Phoebe: God! Ooh! What is that smell? Its coming from the bathroom. Ooh! (She goes to the bathroom.)
Joey: Oh, really? You know what your great friend did? We're out to dinner, ok? (he starts talking about the date and we can see what happened through a flashback video) We're getting along, having a really nice time. I was thinking she was really cool. And then, out of nowhere...
RACHEL: (singing) "...marenge, thank you honey, and do the cha-cha. And while she like to be a star, Tony always tended bar. At the, wait, wait, everybody.."
Monica: (She opens the door.) Hey Ross. What's up bro?
Monica: What?! Oh.(She turns around quickly and falls)
Phoebe: No! But she gave me the box that it came in. It had a picture of the bike on the front. (Theyre all speechless) So I would sit on it and my step-dad would drag me around the backyard.
Monica: Joey, what are you doing? You promised Phoebe you wouldnt eat meat until she has the babies!
Rachel: Okay, fine. (She gets up and walks into her bedroom)
Phoebe: How are you? (The woman nods) Good. (She goes over to another couple of women.) Hi, thanks for coming.
Cecilia: No! Its because that way the camera only sees her! (She takes her hands off his face.) Do you wanna try it?
Rachel: Hit me. (He does so.) Hit me. (He does so.) Hit me. (He does so.) Hit me. (He does so.) Hit me. (He does so.) Hit me. (He does so.) Hit me. (She slows down with each one.)
Monica: She looks exactly like Aunt Marilyn.
Ross: Oh, no. At first I have to get you to agree. Then we'll see if she wants to come back.
Precious: He proposed to you? This is the worst birthday ever. (she starts to cry again)
(the receptions is puzzled. She goes in the back.)
Rachel: Oh my God! Was she old? Does she have a view?
Joey: All right look, Ross, hes right. Emilys great, shes great! But this way too soon, youre only gonna scare her!
Monica: I just tell her, I have to get it over with. I told Ross and Phoebe and shes the only one left!
(She turns around and glares at him, he turns away.)
Phoebe: Yeah, she was bald, shes not now.
Joey: Yeah, she said you looked like Ingrid Bergman that day.
Phoebe: Hello, Hello. Ohh, OHH, she knew I could kick her ass.
Monica: Yeah sure, nature called, she wanted to see who else did.
Eric: I am so stupid. Of course she was lying! Shes not a teacher. Theres not such a thing as the top secret elementary school for the children of spies.
Phoebe: Why, do I have a feeling thats not as happy as it sounds? (Joey points out one going into the chipper to her, as this haunty, demonic music starts to play in the background) No! Nooooo!!! (she winces in horror and hides her face against Joeys shoulder, as she sees the tree spit out from the chipper.)
Chandler: See my friend-my friend, Rachel, she wants to be set up.
Phoebe: Okay, lesson one: chords. Now, I don't know the actual names of the chords but umm, I-I-I made up names for the way my hand looks while I'm doing them. (She starts to show Joey the chords. Transcribers Note: For this one you'll have to use your imagination, 'cause it would take me 50 pages to describe each one. So if you want to see them, you'll have to wait for this episode to come to a TV near you.) (Holding up her hand and then reconfiguring her hand with each name.) So then, this is Bear Claw. Okay, umm, Turkey Leg and Old Lady. (Joey tries to imitate them.)
Joey: Hey, it's great having you back. You know, stay as long as you want, and when does she stop crying all night?
Ross: She already lives in London.
Monica: I got it! (She hits a forehand smash that bounces right in between Doug and Kara and scores a point.)
Mike: Yeah, I understand, but before you do, she really needs to hear this.
Paul: (standing in front of a mirror and to himself) Just relax. Just relax Paul, youre doing great. (Ross moves a piece of luggage over so he can watch Paul.) She likes you. She Maybe, she likes you. She likes you. Yknow why? Because youre a (pause) neat guy. (Ross cant believe what hes hearing.) You are the man. You are (pause) the man! (He opens his shirt and looks at his chest.) I still got it. Nice and sexy. Youre just a love machine. (Starts singing) Im just a love machine and I wont work for nobody but you! Hey bab-y! (Flexes and grunts loudly.) Showtime. (Starts to leave and starts singing.) Im just a love machine, yeah ba-by! (Grunts again and Ross is stunned.)
Monica: Okay. (She gets off him.) God well, we gotta go back and get them!
Monica: (opening the door) Hi Pheebs, whats up? (She enters.)
Monica: Because shes not gonna get to keep the babies.
(In slow motion, Phoebe snaps the ball, Rachel goes long. Joey and Chandler and all over Phoebe, leaving Rachel wide open. Ross starts to rush Monica, who sees Phoebe is double covered, in desperation she throws to Rachel. We see flying through the air, and then Rachel running underneath it, then the ball, then Rachel again, then the ball, then Phoebe, Chandler, and Joey staring at it in shock. Then with the grace of Jerry Rice (no offense to Jerry Rice), Rachel catches the ball, and she stops and spikes the ball. Both Phoebe and Monica erupt in celebration.)
Rachel: (thinks) Yknow, I dont-I dont know. Let me, let me check. (As she heads for her office, she stops glances over her should at Tag, looks into her office, and finds the folder on her desk.)
Monica: Okay, just stay there a couple more hours and if she doesnt show up by then, then just come on home.
Rachel: Hi! I just wanna-(sees Monica)-Ahhh!!! Oh my God! (She runs out in horror.) Oh my God!
Monica: Shes my favorite character on DOOL.
Carol: Look, I-I-I am sorry that Rachel dumped you cause she fell in love with that Mark guy, and you are the innocent victim in all of this, but dont punish your friends for what Rachel did to you.
Phoebe: Shes just so cute! I just wanna bite her ear off and use it and a sucking candy.
Ross: What?! Are you insane? This woman stole from you. She stole. She's a stealer.
Rachel: Because she hates Pottery Barn.
Mr. Geller: Oh my God, does she really thinks that?
Rachel: Oh is it?! (She answers the cute guys phone.) Uhh, hello? (On her phone) Yes hi, is Rachel there? (On the other phone) Yes she is, just one moment please. (To Phoebe, holding out both phones.) Its for me!
Rachel: Wh(Turns and looks at the gang whos staring)Why dont I tell you over here? (She walks Melissa away from the gang.)
Mrs. Geller: Rachel's coming up the path. Doesn't she look pretty. Jack... (Rachel enters with a huge nose)
Ross: Yeah, which she probably stole from some cheerleader.
Monica: Ooh, and I can do this. (She kisses him on the cheek.)
Lauren: Ill see you tomorrow. (she kisses him full on the mouth.)
Rachel: Aw, its unbelievable! Wow! She is kicking so much! Oh, shes like umm oh whos that kind of annoying girl soccer player?
(She finishes cutting them up and they all cheer.)
Ross: Look, I-I know how miserable you are, I wish there was something I can do. I mean I wish I were a seahorse. (She glares at him) Because with seahorses its the male, they carry the babies. And then also umm, Id be far away in the sea. (He sits back down.)
Rachel: No! Yknow what? No! No! You thing was so stupid anyway, this was ridiculousWere gonna flip a coin! (Phoebe gasps.) All right?! (She flips the coin.) Heads! (Looks at the coin and grunts in disgust.)
Ross: Does she.
(She grabs her bag and leaves, Joey moves a little quicker to his apartment, leaving Monica and Chandler alone.)
Chandler: What does she do?
Joshua: Its this way? Sorry. (He walks past her and she again admires his butt.)
Susan: She.
Ross: No no no, she gets a credit, hey, I'm in there too.
Monica: What the hell is that dog doing here?! (She notices the dog sitting in the living room.)
Phoebe: Youre Elizabeths father, huh? I can see now where she gets her rugged handsomeness.
Ross: Anyway, if she, if she wasnt in to me, why-why would she ask me out again?
Monica: Do you wanna live outside?! Because its gettin cold! (To Phoebe) She gets tons of catalogs and umm, shell fold down the pages of the things she thinks that Id like.
Chandler: Hey Rach! (She breaks up and goes back into Monicas.)
Joey: Theres this woman, that I like. A lot. Well, its complicated. Shes with this other guy. For a long time. And I could never do that to the guy, yknow? Ccause were really good friends.
Rachel: Oh God, she mu... she must need her diaper changed.