words in movies
Chandler: You dont have to stop having fun just because Im here. Kathy didnt cheat on all of you. (To Joey) Well, except you. (They hug and Chandler goes into the bathroom with the chick and duck following him.)
Monica: Hey, Joey, I dont think that you should leave Chandler alone. I mean its only been two days since he broke up with Kathy. Maybe you can go fishing next week?
Mr. Waltham: (entering) I almost forget the tickets, didnt I?
Chandler: Yknow, I cant believe Kathy did this too me. I really, thought that she was the one. I tell you what, from now on Im never getting out of this chair, ever! Okay? From now on, this chair is the one! You wanna what else is the one? My sweat pants!
Ross: He hasnt gotten out of that chair in two days.
Monica: I dont know sweetie.
Monica: I cant! I have to work!
Rachel: Ohh, gosh. You guys, come on, this isI have to meet Joshua! This is my one chance for him to see the fun Rachel. Yknow the "Wouldnt it be great if she was my wife" Rachel. Ohh, all right! Are Joey and Chandler back?
Monica: (looking out the peephole) Ohh, shes looking down the hall. Oh! She looked right at me! Oh wait, you cant see people through that little hole, can you? (Goes back to the door.) Hello!
Emily: Really?! Well, thats just lovely, isnt it? I mustve missed your call, even though I didnt leave the flat all day.
Phoebe: Dont you just love the way they talk?!
Monica: Oh wait, Joey, you cant go like that! You stink!
Joey: Look, I know I feel asleep before I could shower and now I dont have time! Theyre just ten blocks away, if I run, I can make it.
Rachel: Well, I didnt see Joshua last night, but I did punch a girl in the face.
Rachel: No, she was already in, but then this big bitch behind me tried to steal my umbrella, so I clocked her. Ohhh! I cant believe this, all I wanted was a few hours outside of work to see Joshua, so he can go ahead and start falling in love with me.
Chandler: Maybe, she doesnt hit him all the time.
Ross: When we first met her, she was soaking, her feet were wet! Who wouldnt be miserable? Im telling you when I got her into a dry pair of shoes, she was a totally different person.
Rachel: I dont get this! She was horrible! (She hits Chandler, yet again.)
Rachel: I dont care! All right, yknow what Im just upset that Im getting nowhere with Joshua thatyknow what still, you do not meet someone and go flitting off to Vermont!
Monica: What are you doing?! Chandler! You cant just go back a phase!
Chandler: Yes you can. Youre thinking about time, you cant go back in time.
Phoebe: Well, look, why dont you just, why dont you do your Phase Two strip club thing with us.
Chandler: (laughs) No you cant.
Chandler: You dont want to be guys, youd be all hairy and wouldnt live as long. (Starts to go to his bedroom)
[Scene: A strip club, the girls are there with Chandler, who isnt enjoying himself.]
Rachel: (joining them) Well, I just checked our messages and Joshua didnt call. I mean youd think hed be worried about me not showing up at his club. Ugh, you know what makes it so much worse, Ross is all happy in Vermont!
Monica: Oh! And dont let me leave without getting the name of that carpet guy.
Joey: I guess you wouldnt believe me if I said I was Kurt Douglas, huh?
Joey: Yeah-yeah, Im one of the cops that wont work with you cause you a lose cannon. Anyway, look, Im really sorry, but I stink!
Charlton Heston: (tosses him a towel, motions for him to get out of the shower and sits down on the couch) Every actor at one time or anotheropp! (Joey tries to sit down next to him and Heston makes him sit somewhere else.) Every actor thinks he stinks, even Lawrence Oliver at sometimes thought he stank, Bob Redford wont even watch himself.
Joey: Oh no-no-no, you dont understand
Charlton Heston: I dont know one actor worth his salt that didnt say at one time or another, "God, I stink!" Hell, I just did a scene out there, first take, I stunk the place up. But, the important thing you must remember, no matter how badly you think you might stink, you must never, ever bust into my dressing room and use my shower! Do you understand me?!
Rachel: (entering) I cant believe it! He still hasnt called.
Monica: What, he doesnt like Josh?
Rachel: No, I dont.
Phoebe: Oh no! Wait! Wait! Okay, yknow what, you were right, you were right. We really werent great at being guys, but you know why? Because were girls.
Chandler: Look, forget it. We tried, but Phase Three is a lost cause, Okay? Those strippers were insanely hot, and I couldnt picture myself with any of them. (Sits back in disgust.)
Monica: They really were pretty, werent they? (Rachel and Phoebe both agree)
Rachel: See, I dont know, for me it would have to Chantal.
Chandler: Where I dont want to have a relationship ever! I just want to have sex with strippers and my friends!!
Joey: I dont wanna.
Ross: I mean, I, I-I admit I-I wasnt quite there. Yknow, I mean the thought of you and that-that Josh guy
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, erm, Monica and Rachel's, Chandler is there and is getting ready to direct a bunch of strippers, Monica, Rachel, and Phoebe on what to do in the upcoming orgy of lesbian lust. Yes, its a dream sequence, this isnt cable.]
Chandler: What do you want from me, Ive never met the guy. So anyway, Rachel, Im sorry you cant stay, (Rachel is upset about leaving the orgy with the cigarette guy.) but the rest of us have a lot of work to do. (The cigarette guy starts rubbing Chandlers back.) What are you doing? (The guy just nods) All right, listen, Ive got to wake up!
Rachel: (on the phone) Monica, Im quitting! I just helped an 81 year old woman put on a thong and she didnt even buy it! (Pause) Im telling you Im quitting! Thats it! Im talking to my boss right now! (Pause) Yes I am! (Pause) Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Okay bye, call me when you get this message. (Hangs up.)
Rachel: Monica, betting the apartment, I dont know about this.
Ross: You know what, you can go, I just have to fill out some forms. (Tries to hold the pen but cant)
Chandler: Yknow when you guys said you were gonna go across the hall and look, you dont, you dont do that every year do you?
The Casting Director: Wait Joey! You didnt need to come down because the director saw your tape from yesterday and loved it.
Joey: Are you kidding me? Watch! (Makes funny faces trying to cry) Well I cant do it with you guys watching me!
Ross: Hi. (They shake hands.) Its nice to meet you. I used to have a friend named Joey. I dont anymore.
Waiter: I dont know. I think maybe one of them is dying. (Pause) I kinda hope its the girl. (The other waiter is shocked.) The guy is really cute!
Monica: Listen, we dont have to make that a guest room, we can think of something to do with the room together.
Chandler: Well, Ross and Emily arent gonna use it.
Ross: Y'know what I didnt wear this suit for a year because you hated it. Well, guess what? Youre not my girlfriend anymore so...
Rachel: Ross said my name. Okay? My name. Ross said my name up there that obviously means that he still loves me! (They both just stare at her.) Okay, dont believe me, I know Im rightdo you guys want to go downstairs and get a drink?
Ross: Yeah, you didnt expect her to live there with a baby did you?
Rachel: And hey! Just so you know, its not that common! It doesnt happen to every guy! And it is a big deal!!
Chandler: Buy stamps, pick up dry cleaning Dont let Phoebe in.
Chandler: I wasnt sure which one Mary-Angela was. (all of Joeys sisters gasp) Look, Im sorry okay, I was really drunk, and you all look really similar.
Eric: I dont think they have a name for it. Its just I get nervous; I start sweating like crazy.
Chandler: He didnt say anything about that to me.
Monica: Okay. (They kiss.) Okay, I cant wait! This is going to be the best Valentines Day ever! (Chandler giggles and exits.) I cant believe it! Make the presents! Make the presents!
Dr. Green: Who is the father? Oh no! Please dont tell me its her! (Points at Phoebe.)
Joey: I dont know, but it smells good. (He gets up and heads for the door only to stop short and start laughing.)
All: I dont have anything. (All of the rest of the women there hide their gifts behind their backs.)
Chandler: I dont know, Monica picked out the flowers.
Chandler: I drew my own bath, but I did it wrong! The waters tepid. The salt didnt dissolve and is now lodged places. And the scents I used dont compliment each other. Eucalyptus and chamomileOh!
Richard: I didnt ask. You wanna come in?
Rachel: Well, however great she was I just cant afford that.
Ross: Oh, she isnt home.
Rachel: Oh my God! It sure didnt look this way when I lived here.
Monica: Come on Rach, when a guy says hes going to call, it doesnt mean hes going to call. Hasnt it ever happened to you?
Monica: Ohh, Im such an idiot. I cant believe I actually thought she could change.
Monica: You may be okay about getting hurt, but I am not okay with being the one who hurts you. Thats why I cant take this job.
Ross: Look, its just did, did you ever go to a party and think, "Would really anyone miss me if I werent here?"
Joanna: (answering the phone) Yes. (listens) Uh, cant you wait until tomorrow? (listens) All right. (hangs up) Unbelievable!!
Monica: (laughs) I dont have anything like that, but let me go see if Rachel does.
Monica: (hangs up) I dont think this numbers right!
Rachel: (laughs) Wow! Umm, yknow, I-I would really love to, but I-I shouldnt.
Chandler: Oh, y'know what, Im gonna be okay, you dont have to throw a party for me.
Joey: Dont worry about that man, that happens.
Monica: I cant walk. Okay? Okay? These boots were a huge mistake!
Monica: Oh I cant. Dr. Roger is coming over again.
Ross: Then dont. Stay here. Just dont go so soon to London, just one more day.
Rachel: What?! Wait a minute! No wait a minute! (She does so.) Okay? Look, that night was the one wild thing I have ever done in my entire life, and Im not gonna let you take that away from me! Okay, so if you dont remember that, maybe you will remember this! (She grabs Melissa and kisses her on the lips.)
Phoebe: Yeah, yeah, no, I dont, I dont know. But, y'know what, maybe its just all for the best?
Ross: Wow! I didnt know that there was a Pottery Barn up here.
Chandler: Oh, and we should warn you, before you watch it: dont watch it.
Tag: Okay I understand. (Sits down.) I wouldnt want to be proved wrong either.
Joey: Oh, I dont know Pheebs. Itll be okay.
Ross: Look, I dont know what youre talking about, I am not a crazy, jealous person.
Joey: Oh, you didnt see the Post?
Chandler: (angrily) I dont think thats what they were talking about Joe!!
Chandler: Well, I didnt do anything. I didnt want to be the guy who has a problem with his boss slapping his bottom.
Ross: Yeah? Not to you, because you know this stuff. I dont know any of it and Im the father. I wish Id be more involved yknow.
Rachel: Honey, honey, Im sorry, I know its our anniversary but I told you on the phone I dont have time to stop.
Chandler: I don’t know what you mean, giant talking cigarette! Oh, by the way, Phoebe called just as I was getting into Nancy’s car, so if she asks you, I was at work all day.
Hypnosis Tape: You are falling fast asleep. Deeper. Deeper. Deeper. You are now completely asleep. You dont need to smoke. Cigarettes dont control you. You are a strong, confident woman, who does not need to smoke. A strong, confident woman.
Ross: Here she comes. Dont say a word, okay? Just be cool, dont be y'know you.
Phoebe: Then its really too bad that you cant tell me.
Joey: Yeah, I-I just made up the stuff about the wedding because I didnt want you to worry about me. But, Im having surgery today.
Rachel: You had to do it, didnt you? You couldnt just leave it alone.
Ross: No, no, no, no! Dont tell me! I dont want to know!
Chandler: Little baby girl Chandler, where I have heard that before? Oh right, Coach Ruben. (Tries to get her to drink a little more from the bottle when he suddenly smells something. Its times like these Im glad Smell-O-Vision hasnt been invented.) Do you know what Pheebs? When youre done over there, we kinda have a situation over here too. (Phoebe is changing hers.)
Monica: Didnt your dad used to call you Pumpkin?
Joey: Hey little buddy, how are you feeling? (The duck does not get sick and Joey recoils in horror and heads for the couch.) What the hell is in that face cream? (Hes about to try out the couch but notices the bed in Rachels room. He walks into her room and feels the bed.) Thats so soft. (He pulls back the comforter.) Pillowcases! (He climbs in and groans in delight. Suddenly, he feels something under him and pulls out a little beat up paperback book. He opens it and starts to read from it.) (In his head.) Zelda looked at the chimney sweep. Her father, the vicar (Stops reading and thinks.) The vicar? (Continues reading) wouldnt be home for hours. Her loins were burning. She threw caution to the wind and reached out and grabbed his (Out loud.) Whoa! (Reads on in silence.) Whoa-ho-ho-ho! This is a dirty book! (Continues to read.)
Phoebe: Isnt it funny how we kept running into each other? Its as if someone really wants us to be together.
Joey: I dont have a key, they took mine to give to you.
Monica: Hey. Its three in the morning. They dont know that Ive come home yet. You notice how neither one of them are wondering where I am.
Phoebe: Okay, I guess. I mean I dont know, its just, I guess I know its going to be over soon.
Joey: (He looks around the room) This isnt the right room, sorry folks. (leaves)
Phoebe: No, no, no, I wouldnt do you myself, I mean that would be weird. Yeah, no, Ill get one of the other girls to do it. Oh, this will be so much fun! Hey! Are you excited?
Phoebe: Chandler sucks! He couldnt have gotten this good!
Rachel: Well no, I dont smell anything.
Monica: I dont see him. Hey! Maybe hes in the sugar bowl! (Opens the sugar bowl) Joey? Nope! (Closes the sugar bowl and they both laugh.)
Monica: Joey, please dont do that. I think its best that we just forget about it.
Chandler: Okay. I cant believe tomorrows the big day.
Phoebe: Oh! I wont say, no to a movie!
Rachel: Yeah honey, Im standing right there! Why didnt you just tell him about the mole I havent got checked yet.
Rachel: Oh nothing I Sorry, I just cant stop crying.
Rachel: Noo! Oh God we didwe didnt, we didnt uhh
Monica: Yeah but it was because I-I had an eye exam and I dont like my new eye doctor.
Joey: Yes! Yes!! And every time you look at it, I want you to remember that you are a good person. Okay, youve had the chance to cheat, and with me, but you didnt. And thats what this ring stands for.
Cliff: It doesnt happen to me either.
Chandler: (looking at Joeys feet) Those arent eleven and a half.
Joey: Well, there were a couple of calls last night, but ah, I dont think any of them are gonna work out.
Richards Date: Yeah, but I didnt get to see it.
Rachel: Oh honey he doesnt need my help.
Monica: (still talking to the woman) All right, Ill do it just this once! But you cant tell anybody!
Phoebe: She was acting, she was pretending like she hasnt heard from him on years, but I found this picture on her fridge, and look (shows Monica)! Isnt this what he would look like now?
Phoebe: Yeah, and maybe that youre a real (She says something in Italian, and it doesnt matter what she said. Its not important so I dont need everyone who speaks Italian telling me what she said.)
Monica: Hey, we would still be living here if hadn’t gotten the question wrong!
Chandler: So you you dont want to live with Don in a cheese house?
Monica: I also, did a little something in fur. But umm, thats really just for me. (Rubs it against her cheek.) Okay. So, why dont you go into your room and try these on and well seeget a better idea of whats gonna work.
Ross: And I can even understand that you couldnt tell Rachel, but why couldnt you tell me, huh? You had all day to and you didnt.
Joey: I know! I know! And Im going to talk to them about it. They mean so much to me. They Theyre like my family. If you guys are gonna be fighting all the time, I-I I dont think we can be together. It just, it just cant work. It cant. (Starts to break up) Im very upset.
Rachel: Oh, I cant watch this. (turns her eyes away)
Phoebe: Okay, what about you? (Points to Karin) Wouldnt you want a date?
Phoebe: Sure, yeah. I mean, its Joey. I dont want him to get hurt. Well, I must say, I am on fire! First Chandler, now Joey!
Joanna: Rachel, please, dont make a scene.
Monica: Ohh, this is soo amazing! I cant believe my brothers getting married! And in London! Its so romantic!
Dina: I I dont care about fashion! Im pregnant! And I know you are too, so you gotta help me!
Ross: Look, I-I know its not a proposal and I dont know where you are, but with everything thats been going on and with Emma and Ive been feeling