words in movies
Ross: Yeah, you didnt get one.
Chandler: (glaring at her) Well, Monica and Chandler cant go. Were going to dinner remember?!
Chandler: I just get mad when Rachel doesnt remember where were going.
Chandler: Wait a minute, all jokes aside? I didnt agree to that!
Ross: I dont know.
Ross: Uh-uhWow! Uh, I thought you guys were just like making jokes, I had no idea. What you know what? You guys are wrong. Uh yes, there is a chronological age difference but I never notice it. You know why? Because she is very mature. Besides, it doesnt really matter to me what you guys think. I mean, Im the one dating Elizabeth, not you!
Rachel: Well, yknow I-I dont know where he is.
{Transcribers Note: Elizabeth has two friends in the room with her who are named in the credits, but not in this scene. So Im just gonna guess since it doesnt matter one way or the other. (The last part is to discourage e-mails, who cares if I got it right or not?)}
Phoebe: You just cant stand anyone else enjoying themselves cant you?
Rachel: Joey! It is an auction! You dont guess, you buy!
Joey: What?! I dont have 20,000!
Chandler: Oh, yeah. (Starts to take it off and then realizes) Uh, no you cant have my jacket! Because then I would be cold! If you thought that you were going to be cold, you shouldve brought your own jacket. But uh, other than that, are you okay? Are you okay?
Chandler: Okay umm, before I meant you I had really little life and I couldnt imagine growing old with
Monica: Oh God, maybe he wont see us. Richard!
(Monica smiles then acts shocked. Chandler cant believe she just did that.)
Chandler: Hey-hey, hey! (Gets up and hugs him.) I dont know why I did that!
Chandler: (to Richards date) And uh, you dont have a mustache which is good. (She just smiles.) Im Chandler; I make jokes when Im uncomfortable.
Monica: Chandler, wh-why dont we sit down?
Joey: I didnt know it was an auction!
Joey: I dont know! Charity?
Rachel: Phoebe, dont you think youve had enough to drink?
Joey: (To Rachel) Hey, I was pretty close. (She just glares at him.) Uhh, so bad news. Umm, I cant buy the boat, I dont have any money.
Rachel: (stopping him) Hey! You cant leave Joey! You agreed to buy that boat, all right?! That is a contract! And plus if you leave, my boss is gonna kill me!
Joey: Well, what am I gonna do Rach?! I dont have that kind of money!
Joey: Look, I dont know why the kids need a youth center anyway! Yknow? They should just watch TV after school like I did and I turned out fine!
Monica: Oh Ross, sometimes grown-ups have commitments they just cant get out of!
Ross: Yknow, maybe she is too young for me. Yknow, when I was over there and she was running around with her friends, I felt like I was a baby-sitter. I finally started to see what you guys were talking about. I dont know what to do.
Monica: Why dont you just weigh out the good stuff about the relationship against the bad stuff. I mean thats what I did when I first (looks at Chandler and pauses) weighing stuff.
Monica: Look Ross, the only question you need to ask is, "Do you see a future?" I mean like do you see yourself marrying her? (Ross pauses in consideration.) Oh my God! You did it already! You married her, didnt you?!
Ross: No! No! I didnt do that. Its just Okay, honestly no. I dont, I dont see a big future with her.
Mr. Bowmont: I was actually relieved uh I didnt win the boat. My wife wouldve killed me.
Mr. Bowmont: I dont think shed like that.
Mr. Bowmont: I dont think so dear.
Rachel: But Joey you dont have $20,000!
Chandler: Richard was there so I couldnt do it!
Joey: We didnt ruin it!
Phoebe: Look, she only suspects something okay? She doesnt know for sure, so just throw her off the track.
Ross: (in his head) Wow! I have never had such a healthy break-up! She was such a grown-up about it! She didnt seem too immature for me! Did I just make a huge mistake?
Chandler: Okay, okay, here she comes! (Sits on the couch next to him.) How do I look? Do I look like a guy who doesnt want to get married?
Richard: I still love you. And I know I probably shouldnt even be here telling you this, I mean youre with Chandler a guy I really like, and if you say hes straight Ill believe you! After seeing ya the other night I knew if I didnt tell ya Id regret it for the rest of my life. Letting you go was the stupidest thing I ever did.
Monica: Oh God (Starts looking around.) Why dont they put chairs back here?!
Rachel: Isnt it incredible?! Monica and Chandler, gettin married.
Monica: So that marriage stuff that you were saying yesterday, you dont really believe that do you?
Chandler: Sure I do. In fact, I think the whole concept of marriage is unnatural. I mean look at pigs. Lets take a second here and look at pigs. Okay pigs dont mate for life. I mean a pig can have like a hundred sexual partners in a lifetime, and thats just an ordinary pig not even a pig thats good at sports!
Chandler: Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! What is all this pressure?! Is this some new kind of strategy? Why dont you put down your copy of The Rules huh mantrap?!
Monica: No I dont know Chandler! Not anymore! Its like its like somethings changed.
Monica: I didnt change!
Joey: I dont know! (All excited) I havent totally decided how to talk on my boat yet.
Ross: Oh, thanks. Yeah, I really thought wed be able to make it work, but uh, I guess it just wasnt meant to be.
Rachel: Yeah, love. Its a tricky business isnt it?
Ross: Ohh, I dont think so.
Joey: Yeah! Yeah, Ive been trying to find ya to tell to stop messing with her and maybe I would have if these (lifts a leg) damn boat shoes wouldnt keep flying off!
Joey: Look, Chandler I dont think us getting our asses kicked is a solution. Okay? Just go and find Monica!
Monica: I dont know why Im here.
Richard: I didnt ask. You wanna come in?
Monica: I dont know.
Monica: Yeah but it was because I-I had an eye exam and I dont like my new eye doctor.
Phoebe: I dontLook I dont know what youre complaining about now? You were both aware of the situation!
Joey: No we werent!
Rachel: Phoebe you cant have both of them! You have to pick one!
Ross: No! Pick me! I dont want to end up an old maid!
Phoebe: No wait! JustOkayJust wait! You guys! Wait you guys! Dont make any rash decisions, okay? Just remember my promise, when we get married, three times a week.
Monica: Yknow, lets face it, Im not a kid anymore! I-I need to be with someone who-who wants the same things that I do! I mean coming to my place of work and telling me that you love me, I want that! Talking about pig sex over lunch, I dont want that!
Monica: Fair? Please dont even talk to me about fair! Fair wouldve been you wanting to marry me back then! Or fair wouldve been Chandler wanting to marry me now! Believe me, nothing about this is fair! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing!
Monica: Nothing. (She backs away a little bit but is still in his arms and looks up at his eyes.) I dont knUmm. I dont know. Umm
Chandler: Oh my God, I cant believe this! Yknow, I thought I thought you were a good guy.
Chandler: Nothing happened? Nothing? So you didnt tell my girlfriend that you love her?
Chandler: Yknow what? I cant believe this! Do you know what you did? My girlfriend is out there thinking things over! You made my girlfriend think!!
Chandler: It was working until you showed up, you big tree! I mean, this isnt fair. You had your chance with her! You had your chance and you blew it! And this is my chance and I am not going to blow it because we are meant for each other! And this is all just been one stupid mistake! (Sits down heavily.) I was gonna propose tonight.
Richard: No I dont have a ring! (Pause) You go get her Chandler. (Pause) And can I give you a piece of advice? If you do get her, dont let her go. Trust me.
Chandler: I cant talk to you now, I gotta find Monica!
Chandler: Well why didnt you stop her?! Why didnt you just tell her it was a plan?!
Joey: I-I did! I told her everything, Chandler! But she wouldnt believe me.
Joey: To her parents I think and she said you shouldnt call her. But if I were you I would.
Chandler: I cant believe I ruined this.
Monica: Chandler In all my life I never thought I would be so lucky. (Starting to cry.) As to fall in love with my best my best Theres a reason why girls dont do this!
Phoebe: Oh no wait no, this is wrong! Ross isnt here!
Joey: All right! Now hey, I need to use the bathroom. Since I dont need any assistance in there, take a break!
Joey: And you couldnt think of anything else?!
Ross: Hey, yknow whats weird? After you guys get married, when you introduce me to people youre gonna have to say, "This is my brother-in-law Ross." Not, "My friend Ross," "brother-in-law Ross." Thats weird isnt it?
Ross: Well, I tell you what. Why dont we uh, why dont we just stay here? Lets not see a movie, well just hang.
Ross: Yknow what?! It doesnt matter! It doesnt matter what you believe! What matters is what happened!
Woman: We were surprise that we werent invited.
Phoebe: Why dont you just try one?
Matt: Sometimes the dialogue itself is just so funny and youllwell be rehearsing during the week and you justwhatever-whatever the joke is; its so funny we cant get through it in rehearsal and just
Parker: I wont quit until you try.
Leslie: (singing) My best shoes, so good to me. I wear them everyday. Down at the heel, holes in the toes. Dont care what people say. My feets best friends, pals to the end. With them Im one hot chicky. Though late one night, not much light, I....
Rachel: Youre lookin at it upside downyknow what? (Grabs the evaluation and throws it out.) It doesnt matter.
Mrs. Geller: Ross, why dont you give us your toast now?
Joey: Okay. Thats good. Okay, that give you a couple hours to prepare what youre gonna say. Good. Yeah. (Someone comes out of his apartment and it startles Joey again.) Dont you people ever knock?!
Phoebe: Well then definately dont take his name.
Rachel: Okay, dont listen to him. Please?
Rachel: (reading the note) "Pheebs, cant make it, got a date. Talk to you later. Big Daddy." (Laughs) Big Daddy?
The Fan: No-no, it was! She was in Sex Toy Story 2, Lawrence of Alabia, and I got her autograph! The guys at the comic book store arent gonna believe this! (Exits.)
Joey: Dont you ah, dont you wanna ask me any questions?
Monica: I dont know exactly. Its-its sorta like wrestling.
Rachel: (Faking crying.) Yeah, he dumped me. He said, "Rachel, I cant do this. Even though you are a very, very, very beautiful women. I cant do this. Im married and Im sorry." And then I dont know why but he said, "and you will never get promoted. Especially not above Kim, who is an integral cog in the Ralph Lauren machine."
Joey: You dont have to seem so happy about it.
Monica: Hey wait a minute, this one isnt dirty.
Chandler: Well, you couldnt have looked everywhere or else you wouldve found her!
Joey: Terrible! I messed up every line! I shouldnt even be an actor!
Monica: Listen uh, I-Ive been doing some thinking, and I dont know whether its because were here or Rachels giving birth but umm, I think we should try to have a baby.
Chandler: Okay, a little problem. The key broke in the lock and I cant get in!
(Rachel rips off another one, revealing another hole. Rachel then moves onto a third one, but this one doesnt have a hole underneath it.)
Joey: Yknow, when we talked about face to face, I dont think we thought it all the way through.
Chandler: You dont think Ive tried? You think I like having 50 dollars taken out of my bank account every month? No, they make you go all the way down there! Then they use all of these phrases and peppiness to try and confuse you! Then they bring out Maria.
Kate: Look umm, I, I was, I was just caught up in the moment. Thats all it was. Joey, Im-Im sorry you feel bad, but havent you ever sleep with a women where it meant more to her than it did to you?
Monica: Hey, Joey, I dont think that you should leave Chandler alone. I mean its only been two days since he broke up with Kathy. Maybe you can go fishing next week?
Ross: No! No! Of course it didnt mean anything! I mean, uh well, I can understand why Emily would think it meant something, yknow, because-because it was you
Rachel: But Joey, I dont think Ross wants me to move into his apartment and disrupt his life like that. I mean(Ross turns to her with wishful eyes.)Or he does.
Rachel: I dont know.
Rachel: I know. I always thought if you and I got married, it would be the one that stuck. And it wouldnt be a secret, and we wouldnt have our wedding dinner at Pizza Hut. (They both laugh.)
Phoebe: Isnt it at three?
Joey: Yeah, isnt that a cool name?
Mona: Cant we just ask her to go?
Rachel: Oh look, shes pulling away again! Do you think my nipples are too big for her mouth? (Joey gets embarrassed.) She looks scared. Doesnt she look scared?
Phoebe: She cant hear you.
Joey: Nothing! Well, I-I got this blinding pain in my stomach when I was lifting weights before, then I uh passed out and uh, havent been able to stand up since. But um, I dont think its anything serious.
Monica: Chandler, you dont believe in soul mates?
Chandler: Yeah! Im just pretending to watch the game so I dont have to help out with stuff.
Lisa: But le Blanc really doesnt mess up much.
Rachel: All right, now dont judge me. I normally wait until my date leaves, but you live here. Im ripping into this swan.
Rachel: Okay mommy, dont ever leave me. (Hugs her.)
Rachel: Oh my God, I cant believe this is a real $20,000 check, oh this is just so exciting.
Phoebe: Its just y'know, been a couple of hours, and she hasnt called. Not that I even care, y'know.
Rachel: I didnt write it.
Rachel: Wow! I cant believe they didnt put it in the part where you said you didnt watch soap operas.
Monica: Joey, you know you dont actually have one.
Kash: Hey! How come I havent seen you here before?
Chandler: Maybe, isnt she the woman who lives below you and has sex really loud?
Phoebe: Oh you dont know.
Joey: What?! All rightHey! Dont look at me! Youre the one who wanted to come up and look for some stupid Burger King comet!
Phoebe: Are you sure it wasnt an oyster?
Phoebe: I cant help you.
Melissa: I dont know. I dont remember a lot of things that never happened.
Monica: No! You dont know the system! Therell be nobody messing with the system!
Rachel: I dont want you to date her!
Emily: Oh, blimey, I still cant believe youve got an earring!
Rachel: (pause) Wow! I dont know, maybe. Im
Joey: (starts to imagine it) I cant. I keep seeing it the good way.
Rachel: You. Like you havent done enough.
Joey: You said you didnt want to go.
Monica: Okay, all right dont judge me to much. Okay? Um, but I saw this info-mercial, and um, I swear to you I have never-ever bought anything on TV before, except for this mop. But there was this stuff on leg waxing, it just, it looked so amazing....
Joey: Rach, its, its ah, its not that we dont want to, really. (quietly) Are we talking models in their underwear?
Chandler: I havent seen this dress.
Ross: Wow! It actually is in the handbook. I cant date you or have a hot plate in my office. I cant believe we have to stop seeing each other.
Monica: Chandler, if you thought I was going to get you porn for Valentines Day (pulls a video out of a basket) you were right! Apparently, its about a young girl who moves to the big city, you know, in search of stardom, but ends up having sex with a lot of guys! Yeah, it got four starts! (looks closer) Oh, wait a minute. Those arent stars. Anyway, you want to take a look?
Monica: Chandler theres nothing wrong with crying! I mean you dont have to be so macho all the time.
Ross: Well uh, yknow what? Even if she doesnt know anything, I do! I have a son. And his mother and I didnt live together, and whenever he was with me I took care of him all the time, by myself.
Chandler: Oh God, it freaked me out. Okay, I know it shouldnt have, but it did. I mean I like her, I dont want to stop seeing her, but every so often its like Hey, y'know what, wheres your leg? I mean Im the smallest person in the world arent I? Im the smallest person in the world.
Chandler: You dont owe me anything, I dont want you money
Monica: Doesnt it ever just freak you out that-that youre never gonna be with anybody new again?
Chandler: Honey, it is not a date! I havent talked to her in ten years! You cant just call up somebody you havent talked to in ten years and ask them for a favor. There are rules, yknow? You gotta, you got to put in some time.
Phoebe: Okay, okay, but Rachels gonna be here too, cant I just ask her this stuff?
Monica: You slept with her didnt you?
Phoebe: I just talked him into it, dont tell me I have to do you too. The puppet master gets tired people.
Ross: First of all its Professor Pittain! And second of all, that little bone, proved that, that particular dinosaur had wings, but didnt fly.
Ross: Oh, see I-I dont know if were gonna be hungry at three.
Joey: Yeah, and there wont be a relationship left to rebuild.
Joey: Well I dont like to say it out loud, but, yeah! Dont feel bad man, we all have our strengths. Youre better with numbers and stuff.
Woman: Dont worry about it.
Chandler: Yes, but havent you wanted a kid like forever?
Chandler: So you didnt mean any of that?!
Phoebe: Yeah. (Pause) Why arent you with Rachel?
Joey: God. Hes crazy! Why doesnt he want to be with Rachel?
Rachel: Oh yeah, theyre really great! Arent they?
Phoebe: No, you cant let this stop you from getting massages! No look, I have, I have lots of clients that make the same noises you do!
Joey: I still havent gotten a check for your half yet.
Joey: Well, it looks like it wasnt heeled after all! Yeah! So, I guess this chair is mine now! (Sits down in it and groans.)
Monica: Joey, what are you doing? You promised Phoebe you wouldnt eat meat until she has the babies!
Chandler: Okay and he hasnt proposed yet because she has no ring on her finger.
Phoebe: Yeah! How would you like it if I sent you to Lee Majors house and told you that he liked you, and you went down there and you found out that he didnt like you? How would you feel?
Joey: No! Forget her, man! You dont need her, you dont need that!
Janice: I .cant .believe this!
Rachel: Oh we-we didnt.
Monica: Okay, well, we have to get past this! Why dont we get rid of the tape and pretend it never existed?
Ross: We had such a great time! Shes-shes incredible! I thought the-the age difference might be a problem, but it wasnt. It wasnt at all. Elizabeth is very mature for her age. (Joey makes the international sign for big boobies.) (To Monica) A concept lost on some people!