words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Chandler are entering carrying groceries and find Phoebe already there standing in front of a huge object that has been gift wrapped.]
Rachel: Ooh, I miss dating. Gettin all dressed up and going to a fancy restaurant. Im not gonna be able to do that for so long, and its so much fun! I mean not that sitting at home worrying about giving birth to a sixteen pound baby is not fun.
Phoebe: No. No! Yes! Ahh. Oh, would you look at that Monica? I just knocked off all of your top scores, how sad.
Monica: Okay. Phoebe thats it. Come on, get outout of the chair. Get out! (She goes to move Phoebe, but Phoebe goes limp and Monica cant move her.) Oh come Phoebe!
Rachel: Joey? Could you get that? (There is no answer and she goes and opens the door to Joey.) What are you doing here? I thought you were in your room?
Rachel: Oh man! This is so great! I actually feel like Im going on a real date! Although, I have a hint of morning sickness, and Im wearing underwear that goes up to about (She snaps the waistband on her underwear that is just slightly below her breasts) there.
Rachel: Yeah, actually thats my roommates.
Student: Ooh, dude. Thats not gonna happen.
Rachel: Now the filet mignon, what comes with that?
Joey: No! No. Umm, just myself and if they dont like me for(Laughs.) Im sorry I couldnt even get through that.
Rachel: Oh my God. And that works?!
Rachel: (looks interested) Oh my God! Wow! That was fantastic, I almost leaned in. I really almost did!
Joey: Thats your move? Boy Rach, youre lucky youre hot.
Monica: Chandler, why would you do that?
Chandler: It is when you put it together with that one.
Chandler: No-no-no, if you unplug it, Ill have nothing to show for my day! It would be like I was at work. (She unplugs it.) No! (And plugs it back in.) Hey look at that! Look at that, its still there! This thing must have some kind of primitive ROM (Read Only Memory, its a memory chip.) Chip in it or something!
Monica: All right fine. Fine, Ill do it. Ive just got to get this off the screen. Carol and Susan are still upset that you taught him pull my finger.
Rachel: I am not gonna answer that!
Rachel: Well that is because you have never been on a date with me before.
Rachel: How do you do that?
Joey: (stunned and turned on) Yeah. WhyYeah, that would work for ya
Ross: Ugh, between the traffic that time of day and all the one-way streets itll take me twice as long. Besides, I teach the class three times a week, who am I? Rockefeller?
Rachel: Hi! Hey, remember how last night we were talking about that movie Cujo?
Rachel: Well dont you have that big date tonight?
Joey: Oh my God! You did too? It totally freaked me out, what was that?!
Joey: Yeah well thats because uh I stayed in my room. Yeah, you dont want to look in my hamper.
Monica: Okay, I got that. Ill escape over there. Ill come back over here. All right, come on Ms. Pac-Man. Its gotRight(She dies.) Well, youre just a little bitch, arent you?
Phoebe: (entering) Hey, you guys. Listen, Im sorry that I was hogging the game before(Sees the top ten list)Oh my God! Your friends have some unfortunate initials!
Joey: No-no! Im fine. Its just Hey, can I ask you something? Have you ever looked at someone that youve known for a while and then suddenly suddenly see them a different way?
Joey: Yeah. Yeah, that thats exactly it. Youre right. Yeah.
Rachel: Okay. (Pushes play.) Okay, thats him! Thats him! Thats Cujo! Thats Cujo!
Brenda: Look, I know it must be hard that your wife is a lesbian, but its wrong. Youre married.
Phoebe: Oh! Okay! Yeah, thats okay. (To Patrick) Have a seat. (Sits Patrick down next to Rachel.)
Joey: Well, right after I did that sex study down at NYU. (to Chandler) Hey, Remember that sweater I gave you for your birthday?
Chandler: Well, I think it's great that you're going on a date, you know? I mean, it sounds healthy. I mean, you have needs. Embrace your womanhood!
Rachel: Okay please tell me that this is just one of your jokes that you do that I dont get.
Pizza Guy: Yeah, that sounds about right.
Phoebe: I gotta call him. Just to talk to him, there's no harm in that.
Ross: I can't believe that didn't work!
Chandler: Ross, that was 16 years ago!
Joshua: Nothing I uh, its just that I know that theyre still out there.
Phoebe: Oh, wait a minute its not gonna be Baby Girl? I thought that was so original!
Joey: (out of his Monica character) Very good! Drawing on your own experience, I like that!
Phoebe: Well, oh, ok now... Only one of us has to stay with Emma. Ok, and as the person who realized that, I get to go!
Ross: I didn't know you knew about that.
Rachel: Oh, Chandler that is so nice.
Phoebe: Wow, a house for dolls, that is so cool! When I was kid, I had a barrel.
Monica: Is that some kind of boat talk?
Joey: You a little sad about that sweetheart?
Rachel: Pheebs, this guy has been obsessed with your sister, for God knows how long, okay, you don't just give up something like that.
Ross: Hey Mon, that was really nice of you to loan Rachel your car so she could go and get the cake.
Ross: Um uh Were-were just having this baby together but uh, uh thats all.
Joey: Things that burn.
Phoebe: And to knowing that your career doesn't mean everything. (Rachel mouths "aah")
Chandler: You kissed her that night too?
Phoebe: Yeah, otherwise, I mean thats, thats, thats just it for us hanging out together. Y'know is that what you want? (they both look away) Can you be civil?
(Monica motions that it went right over Rachel's head.)
Ross: (sarcastic) That would be a good way to get rid of all the PCP we have lying around.
Rachel: Well thats his last name.
Monica: I dont believe this! When someone asks you in for lemonade, and to you that means they wanna have sex?
Phoebe: Uh-uh. Ok. What time is that.
Mr. Kaplan: Well, dont think I havent noticed your potential. Well, Ive got a project for you thats a lot more related to fashion. How does that sound?
Ross: That is why!
Carol: Is it a good sign that they asked us to hang around after the audition?
Chandler: No stupid jokes. I thought that was for the actual wedding.
Mike's father: How's that?
Joshua: No, no, no, shes nice but, yknow, it just it made me realize that Im just not, Im just not ready to be dating, yknow?
Chandler: Yeah, and there's a bowl of cranberry sauce that... (speaking lower to Monica) what happens to cranberry sauce?
Rachel: Howhow did end up in Vermont with that awful witch?! (She hits Chandler again.)
Mike: Yeah, yeah. Hey, thanks for doing that.
Mrs. Green: Oh youre gonna do that ten times a day?
Rachel: What, what, what, no, I don't wanna do that.
[Monica and Chandler both are shocked. Ross gives Monica a take that! look.]
Mike: Is that what you say to Chandler?
Danny: Oh great! That special bond again! Why do women have such a problem with the fact that I'm close with my sister?
Ross: Yeah, yeah. Y'know, now that you kicked the sign, hey! I don't miss Marcel any more!
Chandler: By the way, that fight was totally arousing.
Emily: She said, "If Im not gonna be happy getting married somewhere that we find in a day, well then we should just postpone it."
Joey: (almost crying) That was ME!
Issac: Oh right, that Rachel chick from the coffee place.
Mike: That must have been one lousy movie.
Phoebe: Listen, Mike, if you were Swedish and you were saying the word "lorkins" what flowers would that be?
Monica: About that? Erm...I'm going to change.
Kathy's Co-Star: Oh, yeah! Ooh, thats nice. (They start making out harder.)
Chandler: Well that puts me in a difficult position.
Joey: I can scratch that right off.
Rachel: Ross, those things go like 40 miles an hour! Ok? When you're... and there is that moment when you are at the top, when you just don't know if you're gonna return back to earth!
Janice: Yeah, well, it scares me! I mean I not even divorced yet, Chandler. You know, you just invited me over here for pasta, and all of the sudden you're talking about moving in together. And, and I wasn't even that hungry. You know what, it's getting a little late, and I-I should just, um...(starts to leave)
Monica: Oh my God, Joey, that is such a great tip.
Joey: (interrupting her) Hey! Don't worry about it! It was fine! I ended up having the best time with Rachel! I just felt bad for you, stuck in that room, working on Ross's speech... (pulls a face)
Joey: Hey Chandler, while you were sleeping that guy from your old job called again.
Amanda: I am so glad that you could come over tonight.
Chandler: That really was an incredible wedding.
Rachel: Remember when we went to Central Park and rented boats?.. That was fun.
Rachel: Oh well, hello. This is your lucky day Mr. Bowmont, the uh gentleman day sailer as just become available again and I believe that you made a bid of $18,000.
Monica: Listen Rachel, I feel really bad aboutWhat are you doing? (She sees that Rachel is unpacking.)
Rachel: Thats it. (She crawls onto the bed) Ow!!!
Ross: All right, you know that one was coming, but that doesnt mean you have unagi. (Does the finger thing.)
Rachel: Oh, my-my new assistant has very happy that I hired my new assistant.
Ross: No, it's not just that. It's justI want someone who... who does something for me, y'know? Who gets my heart pounding, who... who makes me, uh... (begins to stare lovingly at Rachel)
Chandler: Why would you say that?
Erica: Oh yeah, let's do that!
PHOEBE: I told you not to do that yet. And, she wants to do a video.
Chandler: I'd just like to say that I'm totally behind this experiment. In fact, I'd very much like to butter your head.
SUSIE: I can't do Chris's makeup. She refuses to acknowledge that she has a moustasche.
Ross: I I do, I do not love Rachel. Im gonna tell her right now about the whole thing so we can get this marriage annulled as fast as possible. Okay? Would I do that if I loved her?
Rachel: Wait, we won't know that until we do it, will we?
CHANDLER: Well yeah, in that it's not being used and I... have it to spare.
Ross: Thats funny. Umm . (Pause, then serious) Its not funny.
Monica: How's that now?
Kate: I think my characters gonna need a little bit more of reason than that.
Ross: Yeah, um, okay see, you were, you were on the list but my friend, Chandler (Chandler waves) brought up the very good point that you are international, so I bumped you for Wynona Rider, local.
Chandler: That is the exact same thing.
Richards Date: Oh, thats real pretty. Wait a minute, dont I get to see the bedroom?
Phoebe: How could you possibly think that?
Rachel: Why didn�t I get that message?
Rachel: Oh stop that!
Phoebe: Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Umm, could-could I get a copy of that? Cause Carol threw it out, she lost ours. Shes such a scatterbrain, but man what a hot piece of ass.
Monica: Just a minute! (To Chandler) Thats Mrs. Tribbiani!
Ross: (waking up) What? (notices that there is now a beautiful woman sitting next to him)
Phoebe: Ooh, this is it! (Looks in the window.) Oh, thats him! Thats him!
Chandler: All right, but you cant use that again for a whole year. Im in.
Rachel: Well, Chandler said that it's really important to him too!
RACH: Oh, look at me, look at me. Oh, I'm on a date with a really great guy, all I can think about is Ross and his cat and his... Julie. I just want to get over him. gosh, why can't I do that?
Chandler: Oh, I hate that. I once had a thing of half and half, stole my car.
Rachel: Ross said my name. Okay? My name. Ross said my name up there that obviously means that he still loves me! (They both just stare at her.) Okay, dont believe me, I know Im rightdo you guys want to go downstairs and get a drink?
Joey: That I can do.
Hilda: Thats right.
Rachel: Oh yes I do. I do. I believe that there is one perfect person out there for everyone. And do you know how you find him? You stop looking for him. Thats why I stopped looking for Russell Crowe. Hell find me.
(Phoebe turns away so that the two weird women wont see the face she pulls, and sits down.)
Joey: I could teach you a speech that I memorized for auditions.