words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Chandler are entering carrying groceries and find Phoebe already there standing in front of a huge object that has been gift wrapped.]
Rachel: Ooh, I miss dating. Gettin all dressed up and going to a fancy restaurant. Im not gonna be able to do that for so long, and its so much fun! I mean not that sitting at home worrying about giving birth to a sixteen pound baby is not fun.
Phoebe: No. No! Yes! Ahh. Oh, would you look at that Monica? I just knocked off all of your top scores, how sad.
Monica: Okay. Phoebe thats it. Come on, get outout of the chair. Get out! (She goes to move Phoebe, but Phoebe goes limp and Monica cant move her.) Oh come Phoebe!
Rachel: Joey? Could you get that? (There is no answer and she goes and opens the door to Joey.) What are you doing here? I thought you were in your room?
Rachel: Oh man! This is so great! I actually feel like Im going on a real date! Although, I have a hint of morning sickness, and Im wearing underwear that goes up to about (She snaps the waistband on her underwear that is just slightly below her breasts) there.
Rachel: Yeah, actually thats my roommates.
Student: Ooh, dude. Thats not gonna happen.
Rachel: Now the filet mignon, what comes with that?
Joey: No! No. Umm, just myself and if they dont like me for(Laughs.) Im sorry I couldnt even get through that.
Rachel: Oh my God. And that works?!
Rachel: (looks interested) Oh my God! Wow! That was fantastic, I almost leaned in. I really almost did!
Joey: Thats your move? Boy Rach, youre lucky youre hot.
Monica: Chandler, why would you do that?
Chandler: It is when you put it together with that one.
Chandler: No-no-no, if you unplug it, Ill have nothing to show for my day! It would be like I was at work. (She unplugs it.) No! (And plugs it back in.) Hey look at that! Look at that, its still there! This thing must have some kind of primitive ROM (Read Only Memory, its a memory chip.) Chip in it or something!
Monica: All right fine. Fine, Ill do it. Ive just got to get this off the screen. Carol and Susan are still upset that you taught him pull my finger.
Rachel: I am not gonna answer that!
Rachel: Well that is because you have never been on a date with me before.
Rachel: How do you do that?
Joey: (stunned and turned on) Yeah. WhyYeah, that would work for ya
Ross: Ugh, between the traffic that time of day and all the one-way streets itll take me twice as long. Besides, I teach the class three times a week, who am I? Rockefeller?
Rachel: Hi! Hey, remember how last night we were talking about that movie Cujo?
Rachel: Well dont you have that big date tonight?
Joey: Oh my God! You did too? It totally freaked me out, what was that?!
Joey: Yeah well thats because uh I stayed in my room. Yeah, you dont want to look in my hamper.
Monica: Okay, I got that. Ill escape over there. Ill come back over here. All right, come on Ms. Pac-Man. Its gotRight(She dies.) Well, youre just a little bitch, arent you?
Phoebe: (entering) Hey, you guys. Listen, Im sorry that I was hogging the game before(Sees the top ten list)Oh my God! Your friends have some unfortunate initials!
Joey: No-no! Im fine. Its just Hey, can I ask you something? Have you ever looked at someone that youve known for a while and then suddenly suddenly see them a different way?
Joey: Yeah. Yeah, that thats exactly it. Youre right. Yeah.
Rachel: Okay. (Pushes play.) Okay, thats him! Thats him! Thats Cujo! Thats Cujo!
PHOEBE: Yes, I was going to incorporate that. Oh good, here's Monica, she'll have something nice to say.
Joey: Well, I ain't gonna say no to that.
Phoebe: Oh, I'd like that.
Rachel: (to Ross) Yes! Did you see that?
Chandler: So there is no good time to ask that question.
Monica: You guys, I am not that bad!
Sarah: Oh, that is so sweet..
Joey: When have I ever done that?! (And does the sound again.)
Paul: (barely glancing at her) No. What ever happened to that little dude. (Pause) So full of dreams
Monica: You could do that!
Rachel: Come on Phoebe, look at that! They are not breaking up, look at them. Okay thats, you know what that is? That is a, that is a second date, thats what that is! Look at that, she just put her hand on his thigh...
Rachel: (laughing) Ohh, that is soo sad.
Ross: Carol was wearing boots just like those the night that we- we first- y'know. Fact, she, uh- she never took'em off, 'cause we-we- (off Chandler's look) Sorry. Sorry.
Chandler: Are we greeting each other this way now? 'Cause I like that.
Mrs. Burgin: Hello. Well, Joshua, that $500 was for groceries.
Rachel: (as Monica) And by the way, have I mentioned that back in high school, I was a cow?
JOEY: Well, well that one has ducks on his t-shirt, and this one has clowns. And Ben was definitely wearing ducks.
Rachel: Dont call us that! (Storms away)
Ross: Okay. I can, I can see that. Umm, but I think if you give me umm, one chance I can, I can change your mind.
Monica: How-how did that happen?
Monica: Why would someone do that?! ...One might wonder.
Ross: Yeah, but it didnt fit. Well, luckily theres a store here that has one left in her size, but Im the groom, Im not supposed to see the dress
Aurora: Yes, you said that.
Chandler: This-this Fonzie person you keep referring too, is that uh, is that another doctor?
Ross: Well, we-we havent said that to each other yet, but I guess its okay to say it to other people.
Director: That would work.
Phoebe: Well thats great! Congratulations!! (She hugs Rachel.)
Monica: That is a slap in the face.
Cynthia: Oh, candles! (Notices something.) What is that? A blanket? A video camera? Oh my God! (As she storms out, Rachel returns and overhears the conversation.)
Chloe: Thats so great for you guys!
Chandler: Well, thats pretty much all Im looking for from these people.
Ross: That guy, he burns me up.
Phoebe: Good thats a good one. Okay, Monica, anything? Yknow? Does Rachel move the phone pen?
Rachel: That had to hurt!
Ross: I like it, and Emily likes it, and thats what counts. So uh, how are you guys doing?
Ross: Oh, is that funny?! Oh, you-you find that funny?! Well maybe Chandler should know some of your secrets too!
Monica: Aunt Syl, I did this as a favor, I am not a caterer. What do you want me to do with a dozen lasagnas? (listens to Aunt Syl on phone, looks shocked) Nice talk, Aunt Syl. (in New York accent) You kiss Uncle Freddie with that mouth?
Monica: (removes them) Thats because I-I was just grabbing some things out of the dryer, and its static cling. Or maybe its just that God knew Id be running into you and saw an opportunity.
Monica: Thats right Patrick, bye-bye!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's Apartment, everyone's there; Phoebe recites the last verse of a poem to Joey. This poem is known as "The Night Before Christmas" by Clement Clarke Moore, but it seems that it's rather "Account of a visit from St. Nicholas" by Henry Livingston.]
Ross: Thats okay, I mean it was just two-week thing anyway, I just didnt want it to end this way, yknow?
Ross: No. No, I didnt. I didnt want to be that guy.
Phoebe: So you like the drums! That's, that's great! Yknow, I was worried, that, you know, they would maybe an unbearable living situation. All right, okay, well, apparently not! So, yay!
Chandler: I dont wanna know what Monica got me. Yknow? I mean, look, Im sure she worked really hard at getting you a present, and wanting to surprise me, and you guys are gonna ruin that, and I, look we have to put these back, this is not what Christmas is about.
Monica: And that would be?
Monica: Im getting married!!!! Im gonna be a bride!!!! (Someone else yells at her.) No, I will not shut up because Im engaged! (He yells again.) Ohh, big talk! Huh, why dont you come over here and say that to me?! Huh, buddy?! Yeah, my fiancee will kick your ass! (Chandler starts to look worried.) Come on, apartment 20! Apartment 20!
Actress/Olivia: That kiss never happened.
Joey: Sorry, that was wax.
Mr. Posner: Yes, thats very good. Now a uh, big part of this job is cultivating personal relationships, especially with designers.
David: Bye Phoebe. (He gets in and the cab drives off. Joey walks up and witnesses that event.)
Phoebe: Id better go. (She goes and sits down in the La-Z-Boy E-cliner 3000, the chair that Sit magazine called chair of the year, and they both look at her.) Just over here: I dont want to miss the fight.
Joey: Yeah, isnt that a cool name?
Joey: I didnt do that! Who wouldve done that?!
Chandler: Thats sweet.
Rachel: Look at that!
Richard: (standing behind her, without his moustache) I can help with that.
Chandler: Wait! I just want you to know that... I'm so happy you're going to be here.
Chandler: You-you-you didnt know that. (Pause as she nods no.) Well, I guess my work here is done!
Monica: Yeah! I didnt know there would be dancing. That was a fun surprise!
Ross: Did that guy just call you Toby?
Monica: Oh! I hate that guy! I mean come on kid! Pull up your pants!
Rachel: (talking on the phone) C'mon Daddy, listen to me! All of my life, everyone has always told me, 'You're a shoe! You're a shoe, you're a shoe, you're a shoe!'. And today I just stopped and I said, 'What if I don't wanna be a shoe? What if I wanna be a- a purse, y'know? Or a- or a hat! No, I don't want you to buy me a hat, I'm saying that I am a ha- It's a metaphor, Daddy!
Chandler: Thats okay Pheebs, were not having a party or anything, so you dont have to get us
Ross: No, I mean, look I dont know if anything is going to happen with us, again. Ever. But I dont want to know that it-it never could. So I stopped it and she got mad and broke my projector.
Monica: Look, there's Chandler. You knew, that stupid friend of Ross'. Said I'm fat. You know I've already lost 4 pounds!
Rachel: Oh thats five Ross. Five women have had five babies! And I have had no babies! Why doesnt she want to come out?
Joey: Thats right I stepped up! Shes my friend and she needed help! And if I had too, Id pee on anyone of you! Only, uhh, I couldnt. I got the stage fright. I wanted to help, but there was too much pressure. So-so I uh, I turned to Chandler.
Charlie: Oh, ah, isn't there another professor that is supposed to come with us?
Ross: (looking then moving away quickly) Uh-huh! Uh-huh! And-and-and Ill always remember that summer because thats when I realized that we are related.
Ross: So, I just finished this fascinating book. By the year 2030, there'll be computers that can carry out the same amount of functions as an actual human brain. So theoretically you could download your thoughts and memories into this computer and-and-and live forever as a machine.
Monica: That is so unfair!
Sandy: That's fair... Although, can I ask... why do you think that is?
Monica: I cannot believe that I just spent the last two days trying to figure out the recipe and it was in my cupboard the whole time!
Mr. Geller: I'd like that.
Chandler: Great story again! The yarns that you weave! Woo-hoo-hoo!
Chandler: (pours more and slides the refill to Joey) All right, say you do that. You know sooner or later somebody's gonna come along that slices a better cheddar. And then where're you gonna run?
Rachel: I dont care how long ago it was! You told people that I was half and half! Yknow what? I just want to point out I never did anything to hurt you in high school.
Chandler: All right, but I should warn you, Im not going. Im going. (Does The Face while saying that last part.)
Rachel: Great! It went great. Really great. Hey, is that wine?
Chandler: Dude! Dude! (Motions that Joey should pull up his pants.)
Rachel: Yeah. And yknow who shouldve shut their drapes? Is that perverted old couple two doors over.
Monica: Wait a minute! So you told people I was pregnant?! (Flash) Does this look like a conversation that I want to remember?!
Chandler: Well thats not fair, youve already had some!
MONICA: It's gonna be ok. Ryan's been under water. He's just gonna be so glad that you don't have barnicles on your butt.
Joey: Dont stop! Move the bowl further away! Ross could make that shot!
Ross: Me. Was that not clear? Hey, why don't, um, why don't I just join you both, here?
Phoebe: You don't need Janice for that, you've got us. We
Joey: It wasnt my ring! Its Rosss ring! Thats why I felt so bad Rach, because he was going to propose.
Rachel: Oh, you guys are gonna have so much fun! She's at such a cute age. Oh, a couple things. Now that she's eating solid food, she poops around the clock. And watch out for your hair, 'cause she likes to grab it. And oh, she's also in this phase where if you leave the room, she screams bloody murder, but ah... Thanks, you guys. Have fun!
Rachel: Hey, that is the babys problem. (Dr. Green returns.) Oh, everything okay with the waiter?
Ross: That little naked guy would be me.
Joey: Nothing. Its just old and dingy, thats all.
Monica: Right. Umm, listen since were-we-re on that subject, umm, I just wanted to tell you that uh, well, I-I was going through a really hard time in London, what with my brother getting married and that guy thinking I was Rosss mother
Chandler: (tongue-tied) Uhl..ell. By the way, in case you missed that, that sound was, "Uhl, ell."
Chandler: Yeah, I can say that I have a conference and you can say you have a chef thing.
Chandler: (standing up) Thats right! Im not!
Joey: No! No, I-I just wanna thank you guys for what you did for my parents, that was really sweet. Theyre so happy they get to be a part of your special day.
Chandler: Because we don't do that. We are Bings! And if there's one thing my father taught me was... well to always knock before going into the pool house... but the other thing was never borrow money.
Monica: (to Phoebe) Remember that guy from cooking school I told you about that put cilantro with everything?
Monica: No, that's not it. It's just that when we were asking him all those questions before, I just... I just realized I don't care if he's the most perfect guy in the world... he's not you.