words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Chandler are entering carrying groceries and find Phoebe already there standing in front of a huge object that has been gift wrapped.]
Rachel: Ooh, I miss dating. Gettin all dressed up and going to a fancy restaurant. Im not gonna be able to do that for so long, and its so much fun! I mean not that sitting at home worrying about giving birth to a sixteen pound baby is not fun.
Phoebe: No. No! Yes! Ahh. Oh, would you look at that Monica? I just knocked off all of your top scores, how sad.
Monica: Okay. Phoebe thats it. Come on, get outout of the chair. Get out! (She goes to move Phoebe, but Phoebe goes limp and Monica cant move her.) Oh come Phoebe!
Rachel: Joey? Could you get that? (There is no answer and she goes and opens the door to Joey.) What are you doing here? I thought you were in your room?
Rachel: Oh man! This is so great! I actually feel like Im going on a real date! Although, I have a hint of morning sickness, and Im wearing underwear that goes up to about (She snaps the waistband on her underwear that is just slightly below her breasts) there.
Rachel: Yeah, actually thats my roommates.
Student: Ooh, dude. Thats not gonna happen.
Rachel: Now the filet mignon, what comes with that?
Joey: No! No. Umm, just myself and if they dont like me for(Laughs.) Im sorry I couldnt even get through that.
Rachel: Oh my God. And that works?!
Rachel: (looks interested) Oh my God! Wow! That was fantastic, I almost leaned in. I really almost did!
Joey: Thats your move? Boy Rach, youre lucky youre hot.
Monica: Chandler, why would you do that?
Chandler: It is when you put it together with that one.
Chandler: No-no-no, if you unplug it, Ill have nothing to show for my day! It would be like I was at work. (She unplugs it.) No! (And plugs it back in.) Hey look at that! Look at that, its still there! This thing must have some kind of primitive ROM (Read Only Memory, its a memory chip.) Chip in it or something!
Monica: All right fine. Fine, Ill do it. Ive just got to get this off the screen. Carol and Susan are still upset that you taught him pull my finger.
Rachel: I am not gonna answer that!
Rachel: Well that is because you have never been on a date with me before.
Rachel: How do you do that?
Joey: (stunned and turned on) Yeah. WhyYeah, that would work for ya
Ross: Ugh, between the traffic that time of day and all the one-way streets itll take me twice as long. Besides, I teach the class three times a week, who am I? Rockefeller?
Rachel: Hi! Hey, remember how last night we were talking about that movie Cujo?
Rachel: Well dont you have that big date tonight?
Joey: Oh my God! You did too? It totally freaked me out, what was that?!
Joey: Yeah well thats because uh I stayed in my room. Yeah, you dont want to look in my hamper.
Monica: Okay, I got that. Ill escape over there. Ill come back over here. All right, come on Ms. Pac-Man. Its gotRight(She dies.) Well, youre just a little bitch, arent you?
Phoebe: (entering) Hey, you guys. Listen, Im sorry that I was hogging the game before(Sees the top ten list)Oh my God! Your friends have some unfortunate initials!
Joey: No-no! Im fine. Its just Hey, can I ask you something? Have you ever looked at someone that youve known for a while and then suddenly suddenly see them a different way?
Joey: Yeah. Yeah, that thats exactly it. Youre right. Yeah.
Rachel: Okay. (Pushes play.) Okay, thats him! Thats him! Thats Cujo! Thats Cujo!
Monica: How did you know that?! (Runs to yell at Joeys apartment.) Joey! Chandler!! Its time!
Phoebe: I'm trying, but man that guy can push my buttons!
(She grabs his arm and drags him over to a table where three beautiful women are sitting. Now, Im going to go out on a limb and say that their names are Stephanie, Karin, and Meg. Okay, so I looked at the credits. Of course, only Meg is named later on, so Ill have to guess who is Stephanie and who is Karin. But, well cross that bridge when we come to it.)
(There's the next bell, and the correct answer. The screen changes to "4 to win" and "things that burn". Gene now realizes that he got two correct answers and gets up in his seat.)
Joey: See? Thats a great smile! Easy. Natural. Now, pretend I have a camera. (Chandler immediately does The Face.) Youre changing it!
RACH: Ohh, well, isn't that just lovely. That's something the two of you will be able to enjoy for a really, really, really, really, really long time.
Chandler: The only way that I said six would be if the sevens, let meet at seven, not at six.
Joey: Oh thats amazing. (Drops the sheet.)
Chandler: Okay. How about in that cabinet?
Rachel: Thats right! You do what the hand says!
Chandler: Thats our phone number. Now look, I know I kinda sprung this whole me moving out on thing, so why dont I justwhy dont I just cover you for a while?
Chandler: I figure that $1,500 would cover him for a few months, yknow? But I have to trick him into taking it so I wont hurt his pride.
Phoebe: No, okay, youre right. Youre easy-going. Youre just not as easy-going as Rachel. Shes just more flexible and-and mellow. Thats all.
Rachel: Yee. I mean, it was so weirdest thing. They fired me and then out of nowhere they just hire me back! I mean, that place must have been falling apart without me.
Chandler: Thats a good idea.
Ross: Hey where-where are the pictures that creepy pretzel vendor took of us together?
Phoebe: No-no, I got that.
Chandler: I want to say you but, that seems like such an easy answer.
Rachel: Joey no, this is wrong! You have to take it back, okay? You dont want to win an award this way. Youre very talented. And someday youre gonna win one of these for real and that one is gonna mean something.
Chandler: Yeah that was great. That was really great! But to tell you the truth, I'm more excited about where we are right now.
Rachel: Ross, please, this is a hospital, ok? That actually means something here.
Chandler: Okay, so thats it, everybody knows! Its official, were moving in together. No turning back. Are ya scared? Are ya?
Phoebe: Yeah, you like that dont you?
Phoebe: Thats it. Just relax.
Phoebe: Oh no, I am mad at you. I know that much. But, I am sorry about the fat ass thing. You actually have a very sweet little hiney.
Ross: That only is not funny, it's physically impossible! Ok? Depending on the species I'd have to have a six foot long... (pause) It's not funny!!
Joey: Yeah, was there a part of you that... felt like it was... really wrong?
Ross: (To Phoebe) Ugh, can you believe that guy!
Ross: Thats no problem.
Woman on TV: Ow! Ow! Ooh! That hurts!
Chandler: Woah, woah, thats not pretty!
PHOEBE: C'mon you guys. It's a known fact that lobsters fall in love and mate for life. You know what, you can actually see old lobster couples walkin' around their tank, ya know, holding claws like. . .
Ross: (stopping quickly) Oh umm, theres also a book here by a woman named Wendy Bagina. (They both laugh, but stop when the hear moaning coming from the next aisle.) What is that?
Paul: Wait! Wait! Listen! Listen to this! (Flips a couple pages and points to something.) Yknow what I wanted to be when I was that age?
Guy: Im sorry, its just that youre so incredibly beautiful.
Rachel: What the hell is that?!! (to Monica) What the hell is that? Is that you? (Monica nods her head no, and Rachel realizes what is making that sound.) Ohhhhhhh! (storms over to Chandler and Joeys with Monica in trail.)
Phoebe: How could you not tell Mona that Rachel is living with you?
Joey: Actually, you know what? I am. That whole thing with Rachel made me realize that maybe I'm ready for a more serious relationship. You know? Like I'd like to meet a nice mature commitment-minded lady. And looks aren't as important as...Nah, she's gotta be hot.
Ross: That was me.
Ross: Is that supposed to be an insult?
Joey: Yeah-yeah, he was playing blackjack for like an hour and he won $5,000. Can you believe that? $5,000!
Chandler: I can do that.
Erica: You're kidding me? I mean, it's enough that you are a doctor. But on top of it, you're married to a reverend?
Monica: Thats different, we were roommates! And when?!
Mrs. Lynch: I didnt realize that she was so close.
Joey: That's not the point Chandler. The point is that you lied.
Joey: Over the line?! You-youre-youre so far past the line, that you-you cant even see the line! The line is a dot to you!
Rachel: Wow that was a big one.
Ross: I thought that was just a rumour.
RACHEL: Oh shoot.� I forgot to pay Phoebe for the drinks.� (She exits to the hallway and closes the door behind her.)� Wait, wait.� Sorry.� Did he call?� Did that guy call?
Chandler: Monica, I was wondering if you can make me some of that righteous mac and cheese like last year.
Rachel: All right. So you're telling me that there is nothing going on between you and Chandler.
Joey: Yeah, I thought you knew that.
Ross: Phoebe! I can't believe you gave them money! I thought you agreed it was totally unreasonable that they asked me for that money!
[Cut to later in that episode. Phoebe is telling Rachel in Monica and Chandlers that Chandler wants to make a date with Phoebe.]
Chandler: Cheese you say? Thats some pretty smelly work, huh Don?
Chandler: Steps! (He opens the door to his apartment to Ross and Joey looking at the new Playboy) Slut! (Ross and Joey quickly hide the Playboy behind their backs. Chandler wonders into the girls apartment.) You will all be very happy to hear that Kathy is sleeping with that guy!
Monica: Just go up to her and ask her out. (Chandler laughs) Oh, what's the worst thing that could happen?
Anchorwoman: (on TV) While most of us think of chocolate bunnies and baskets as traditional Easter gifts. Some people insist on giving live chicks as presents. (Joey is intrigued by the idea) Unfortunately, the sad fact remains that most of these little guys wont live to see the fourth of July. (Joey starts to call a place to buy a little baby chick) Because of as a result of improper care, they will be dead.
Monica: Stop it!! Thats not funny!!
Monica: Okay, fine but please dont be upset! Okay? I was really depressed okay? And really drunk! I just wanted something stupid and meaningless. I just wanted just sex. So, when I went to your room that night I was actually looking for Joey. (Joey smiles.)
Ross: You look great. I, uh... I hate that.
Ross: Thats my favorite shirt! Okay? I love that shirt!
Monica: It's okay. It's okay. Just pretend that it didn't happen! Okay? No one needs to know! I mean, Phoebe's not an official ballplayer! I mean, only official ballplayers can drop the ball!
Rachel: Oh yeah. That makes sense.
Rachel: Ooh, I can do that.
Chandler: Yes, we dont get married unless theres a sign! Okay, so say uh, say you roll another eight (motions to the craps table) then theres a definite sign that we should get married.
[Cut to Rachels bedroom, Phoebe and her are entering. And its obvious that shes not packed.]
(Rachel slowly spins around, finally noticing that the lights have outstayed their welcome.)
Phoebe: How did that happen?!!
Chandler: Uhhuh, how did you know that?
Rachel: Can you believe that?!
Joey: Thats crazy!
Rachel: Thats what I told him!
Rachel: Oh my God youre amazing! Did you just pull that out of her purse?
Chandler: Oh, I am no women, but that is one tasty dish. (Phoebe walks in.)
Phoebe: ThatIts not the same thing! This is totally different! This is with David! Remember David, the scientist guy? Okay, hes very special to me.
Joanna: You tell your friend Chandler that were definately broken up this time.
Rachel: No! No, no-no-no Joey he doesnt want to buy my baby! I made that up!
Monica: Uh well that depends, how are things with Phoebe?
Ross: What? Rach! Come on, thats terrible! Theyre uh theyre babies. Theyre-theyre all beautiful.
The Instructor: Okay ladies, that ends todays class, and lets remember, lets be safe out there.
Ross: Not touching myself if that makes anyone less uncomfortable.
Pete: Well don't forget that fiches over there by Rachel.
Ross: Ok, but you know what? I gotta say, I'm really impressed that you were able to memorize all this so quickly!
Monica: Thats not your regular dry cleaners.
The Photographer: (taking pictures) Great! Thats great Monica! Great! Now, Chandler, you want to give us a smile?
(For the first time we see that the woman Ross is talking too is in fact the hot girl that Joey is looking for. She just kinda stares at him.)
Ross: Okay, okay, I was typing names into the library computer earlier, yknow-yknow for fun, and I typed mine in and guess what came up? My doctoral dissertation! Its here! Yeah, its right-its right down here! In the biggest library in the university! (They start heading that way, towards a secluded section behind the racks.)
Rachel: Yeah I know! I miss that.
Phoebe: Oh, what was that for? Like a bake sale?
Monica: Really you can do that?
Chandler: OK, I'm officially unpacked. Thanks for helping me man. (Turns around and sees that Joey isn't there.) Joe? (Hears giggling coming from a box) Well, I guess Joey went home. Oh and look, there's still one box that I have to unpack. (Hears the giggling again)
Ross: Can you believe that?
Joey: Although some of that stuff wasn't where you said it was gonna be, but... (confidently) I made it work.
Joey: Good evening. Im Mr. Tribbiani. And I will be teaching acting for soap operas. Now um, on my first day as (proudly) Dr. Drake Remoray on Days of Our Lives, (looks for a reaction from his students, and gets none.) I learned that one of the most important things in soap opera acting is reacting, this does not mean acting again, it means, you dont have a line, but someone else just did. And it goes like this. (looks all intense for a moment and then gasps, the students cheer him) Thanks, thanks, a lot. Oh, by the way, before I forget to work in soap operas some of you will have to become much more attractive. All right, moving right along.
Phoebe: Yep, we shook on it. Yeah but believe me that is not how he wanted to seal the deal.
PHOEBE: It's not even that. I used to do my songs because it made me happy, but now it's like, it's just all about the money.
Monica: Remember that guy that gave me a bad review? Well (Feeds him a spoonful of what shes cooking.) Im getting my revenge!
Rachel: Oh yeah. Thats a great story.