words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Chandler are entering carrying groceries and find Phoebe already there standing in front of a huge object that has been gift wrapped.]
Rachel: Ooh, I miss dating. Gettin all dressed up and going to a fancy restaurant. Im not gonna be able to do that for so long, and its so much fun! I mean not that sitting at home worrying about giving birth to a sixteen pound baby is not fun.
Phoebe: No. No! Yes! Ahh. Oh, would you look at that Monica? I just knocked off all of your top scores, how sad.
Monica: Okay. Phoebe thats it. Come on, get outout of the chair. Get out! (She goes to move Phoebe, but Phoebe goes limp and Monica cant move her.) Oh come Phoebe!
Rachel: Joey? Could you get that? (There is no answer and she goes and opens the door to Joey.) What are you doing here? I thought you were in your room?
Rachel: Oh man! This is so great! I actually feel like Im going on a real date! Although, I have a hint of morning sickness, and Im wearing underwear that goes up to about (She snaps the waistband on her underwear that is just slightly below her breasts) there.
Rachel: Yeah, actually thats my roommates.
Student: Ooh, dude. Thats not gonna happen.
Rachel: Now the filet mignon, what comes with that?
Joey: No! No. Umm, just myself and if they dont like me for(Laughs.) Im sorry I couldnt even get through that.
Rachel: Oh my God. And that works?!
Rachel: (looks interested) Oh my God! Wow! That was fantastic, I almost leaned in. I really almost did!
Joey: Thats your move? Boy Rach, youre lucky youre hot.
Monica: Chandler, why would you do that?
Chandler: It is when you put it together with that one.
Chandler: No-no-no, if you unplug it, Ill have nothing to show for my day! It would be like I was at work. (She unplugs it.) No! (And plugs it back in.) Hey look at that! Look at that, its still there! This thing must have some kind of primitive ROM (Read Only Memory, its a memory chip.) Chip in it or something!
Monica: All right fine. Fine, Ill do it. Ive just got to get this off the screen. Carol and Susan are still upset that you taught him pull my finger.
Rachel: I am not gonna answer that!
Rachel: Well that is because you have never been on a date with me before.
Rachel: How do you do that?
Joey: (stunned and turned on) Yeah. WhyYeah, that would work for ya
Ross: Ugh, between the traffic that time of day and all the one-way streets itll take me twice as long. Besides, I teach the class three times a week, who am I? Rockefeller?
Rachel: Hi! Hey, remember how last night we were talking about that movie Cujo?
Rachel: Well dont you have that big date tonight?
Joey: Oh my God! You did too? It totally freaked me out, what was that?!
Joey: Yeah well thats because uh I stayed in my room. Yeah, you dont want to look in my hamper.
Monica: Okay, I got that. Ill escape over there. Ill come back over here. All right, come on Ms. Pac-Man. Its gotRight(She dies.) Well, youre just a little bitch, arent you?
Phoebe: (entering) Hey, you guys. Listen, Im sorry that I was hogging the game before(Sees the top ten list)Oh my God! Your friends have some unfortunate initials!
Joey: No-no! Im fine. Its just Hey, can I ask you something? Have you ever looked at someone that youve known for a while and then suddenly suddenly see them a different way?
Joey: Yeah. Yeah, that thats exactly it. Youre right. Yeah.
Rachel: Okay. (Pushes play.) Okay, thats him! Thats him! Thats Cujo! Thats Cujo!
Dr. Green: Thats true.
Phoebe: Yeah, but I-I-I-I can do that for you, Im gonna do that for you.
Chandler: Honey! Thats crazy! I dont want you to get me a stripper
Phoebe: Wait, am I missing something though? Cause I thought death was something thats supposed to be sad, in a way.
Chandler: Thats the way I did it til I was 19.
Rachel: Oh you missed it. She was laughing. Oh it was amazing. It was amazing. It was the most beautiful, beautiful sound that...
Chandler: Thats me.
Chandler: That was weird.
Rachel: Well in High School, that added up to head cheerleader.
Mrs. Verhoeven's Daughter: Thats so sweet. (Takes the flowers.) Would you like to come in and say good-bye? Im sure it would mean a lot to her.
Dr. Green: Stay calm?!! How do you expect me to stay calm?! This is unacceptable Rachel! And I wanna know why?!! Is it because that punk Ross wont marry you?! Thats it! Is that it?!
Phoebe: No look, weve apologized twice! I cant do anymore than that. I know you hate it when people are mad at you but you just have to be okay with it.
Monica: Is that, is that what they call strippers sometimes?
Chandler: Why would she do that?
Joey: All right, you know what? We don't have a choice. It's like I would have said in that sci-fi movie if I'd gotten the part. "Those are our men in there, we have to get them out! Even if I have to sacrifice the most important thing in my life; my time-machine."
Chandler: Its not just that shes cute, okay. Its just that... shes really really cute.
Joey: Wait a minute, did you just make up all that stuff just to get out of being my agent.
Chandler: Yeah-yeah, so big that it actually makes our doors look smaller!
Emily: I cant believe theyre doing that to him! I told them to go easy on him!
Rachel: Oh thats nice.
Monica: Why did I 'woo-hoo'? I mean, what was I hoping would happen? That-that he'd turn round and say 'I love that sound, I must have you now'?
Joey: Yeah, I like that. But no-no, how does that explain why Rachel found my underwear at your place?
Chandler: Okay, so now do you believe that she's attracted to me?
Ross: We were drunk! I wouldve married uh, Joey with that amount of alcohol!
Chandler: Yeah, Im not sure I can do that.
Joey: That sounds like another word to me! Are you gonna take this seriously? (Theres no response from Chandler.) Okay.
(Decided that they are less than human as well, Chandler picks up a golf club and Monica a frying pan, to join in on the fun of beating their good friend to within an inch of his life!)
RACHEL: Oh, what do you, you want me to stop seeing him, is that what you want?
Chandler: Hey, yknow what, if youre gonna do that, if youre gonna name him Joey, you should name him Chandler. (Phoebe doesnt think so.) Oh, come on! Chandlers funny, sophisticated, and hes very loveable, once you get to know him.
Rachel: Ross, didn't you say that there was an elevator in here?
Will: That was such a fun night!
Rachel: (sees Will) Oh my God Monica, who is that?
Ross: no, no, no there's nothing wrong with you I mean you don't strike me as the type of person that wants to get married anyway.
Monica: Chandler, this is not our problem. We've got each other. That's all that matters.
Joey: (quietly) Oh. How-how big is that?
Joey: That hot girl from their wedding?
Ross: This couch, is cut in half! I would like to exchange it for one that is not cut in half!
Will: Well, we did a little more than that.
Matt: Thats a good one? (They both laugh.)
Monica: You started that?!
Rachel: What?! You heard that?! (Goes and stands behind Joey.)
Rachel: Oh my God, it's so huge, but you just have to promise me that you cannot tell anyone.
Monica: Thats not totally true.
Phoebe: Okay, I didnt understand that, but yknow, maybe thats cause you were speaking the secret language of love!
Chandler: Is that a problem?
Russell: So thats your second marriage in two years.
Mr. Bing: Yes! Although, I think we may be seeing a little too much of some people. Arent you a little old to be wearing a dress like that?
Rachel: Rachel Green's office!! Give me that phone! (takes the phone) Hello, this is Rachel Green, how can I help you? Uh huh ... ok then ... I'll pass you back to your son (gives phone to Gavin)
Will: Oh, youd like that wouldnt ya?
Chandler: Oh no-no-no. This is amazing. (He goes over and presses a button on a remote control that opens the entertainment center doors revealing the TV.)
Joshua: Wow! That would be great.
Joey: Yes!! Ha-ha!! All right! Hey! How cool would it be if you could watch like a real life-sized version of this? Huh? I mean how crazy would that be?
RACHEL: Do you guys ever get the feeling that um, Chandler and those guys just don't get that we don't make as much money as they do?
Chandler: Oh no-no-no I was just squinting. That doesnt mean anything.
Joey: If you get a second, find out where she got that cheeseburger.
Phoebe: You know, it's a lot less surprising to do that after I've buzzed you into the building.
Joey: (entering) Okay, I'm in my sweat pants. Bring on the food! (Sees that Chandler has a worried look on his face) What's the matter?
Rachel: No! Its just that, Kate bothered me.
Chandler: (entering) Oh hey Rachel, sweetheart? You have got to tell the post office that you have moved. Okay? We are still getting all your bills and stuff. (Hands her all of her bills and stuff.)
Joey: Is that a sandwich?!
Bitsy: Oh, please darling, let's be honest. You can have all the... sailor fun you want with that one, but... let's be real...
Joey: It was so stupid, I said some stuff in an interview that I shouldnt have said. But believe me, thats not gonna happen today.
CHANDLER: Well I didn't think that was serious. [grabs the spoons back] Ya know I thought that was just a fight.
Chandler: Yknow, that party wasnt bad.
Rachel: No, I couldn't let you do that.
Chandler: (Pause) Y'know, I-I can't really put a price on that Joe.
Rachel: Oh... sit down, sit down. Oh, honey, you know, I once also almost married somebody that I didn’t love. Do you remember Barry?
Joey: Ahhhhhhhhhhhh . That-that-thats really just to show where the baby would go. Yknow why dont I hold on to him so that theres no confusion? (Takes him back, sets him on the chair, and apologizes to him.)
Tim: Whoops. Sorry. (Looking at it, like a newscaster) This just in. (Phoebe fake laughs.) Oh, its 9-1-1 from the restaurant, that means Monica needs me right away. (Starts to leave.)
Jack: That’s true! This message could becoming to you from beyond the grave, Emma!
Dennis Phillips: Oh my God, that was for my benefit?
Monica: Yknow, I really have to tell Rachel, but I We just have to get it over with! Yknow, the next time we see them were just gonna tell them. Okay? Thats it.
Rachel: Okay. Uhh, Ross, y'know what, there's something that I-that I have to talk to you about and everybody's saying that I shouldn't tell you, but I think they're wrong. I mean, and you know how people can be wrong.
Sandy: I really do understand how hard it's gotta be to leave your child with another person. I mean, it's leaving behind a piece of your heart... (Ross has got that bored/angry/skeptic look and Rachel is very emotional)
Monica: No, I want everything that you just said. I want a marriage.
Ross: Postpone it? Emily, do you think Monica realises how much our parents spent on this wedding? Do you my sisters teeny-tiny little brain comprehends that people took time out of their lives to fly thousands of miles to be here, huh? (He puts his pants on backwards.) This isnt right.
Rachel: Chandler, you stole this cheesecake. That is wrong.
Phoebe: Thats it?! You call that a fight? Come on! "We were on a break!" "No we werent!" What happened to you two?!
Phoebe: That is nice and were done. TADA!
Phoebe: Ooh! Thats good! Wow! But now if you were pregnant, what would you name it? Hint: Phoebe.
Ross: I know. Can you believe that?
(Ross is now preoccupied with the spider, and forgets that Rachel is still using the swing. While trying to get rid of the spider, he stands in front of Rachel, who bumps into him, throwing him on the ground again.)
Monica: That is completely untrue. You think Im high maintenance? Okay, prove it. I want you to make a list and were going to go through it point by point!
Rachel: But, theyre across the hall! I mean thats two doors away, it would take them a long time to peck their way back over here.
Rachel: No! Shoot, Dr. Schiff what kind of question is that?!
Monica: Why did you do that?
Joey: (wiping face) Wow! Didnt know that.
Joey: Yeah. He's gonna keep cheating on my ma like she wanted, she's gonna keep pretending she doesn't know even though she does, and my little sister Tina can't see her husband any more because he got a restraining order...which has nothing to do with anything except that I found out today.
Rachel: Uh Ross? You asked me that.
Phoebe: Okay, a meat eater. Fine, thats one for you.
Ross: Uh, bigger than that.
Ross: Smaller than that.
Phoebe: No, we hate that.
Kori: You sick freak, who does that? I can't believe I had a crush on you! (she leaves and slams the door behind her)
Joey: (on phone) Well, so anyway Beth, what Im saying is I shouldve considered your feelings before I went home with you that night. Ive ah, Ive recently learned whats it like to be on your side of it, and Im sorry. So, do you think you can forgive me? (listens) Great. Thanks. Okay, bye. (He sits down and crosses out something, and dials the phone again.) Hello, Jennifer? (listens) Oh hi, Mrs. Loreo, is Jennifer there? (listens) Oh, shes not home huh? (listens) Well ah, actually I kinda need to talk to you too.
Phoebe: What about me? I just found out that Denise is leaving town for a while, I dont have a roommate.
(Joey sees that she's carrying a small red bag.)
Rachel: Look at that guy by the window, wow!
Mrs. Geller: No-no-no, that was all true. This was just in case you pulled a Monica.
Ross: But thats not enough. So So heres a key to my apartment. (Hands her his key.)