words in movies
(Chandler lets her into the apartment and reveals that Monica is getting a massage from another woman.)
Rachel: Oh Joey, Im so happy things worked out for us that were having this baby together. I love you so much.
Joey: Thats always appropriate! (Back to the matter at hand) Oh, okay. One more push! One more push!
Rachel: Aw, its unbelievable! Wow! She is kicking so much! Oh, shes like umm oh whos that kind of annoying girl soccer player?
Joey: Oh thats amazing. (Drops the sheet.)
Chandler: Okay. How about in that cabinet?
Monica: No! Thats where we keep the canned goods! Have you completely forgotten everything you learned at orientation?
Chandler: Oh yknow, Ive been living here a while and Ive never seen whats inside that closet. What is, what is in there?
Monica: Chandler, there is nothing in there that concerns you! If you love me you-youll let it go.
Monica: Thats different, we were roommates! And when?!
Monica: Okay, if it means that much to you
Rachel: Its not kicking right now. Although we would love to see you do (Mimics him) that again.
Ross: My God, the babys kicking. Thats great. Although I kinda wish I-I wouldve been there to feel the kicking for the first time yknow.
Joey: Wow! Can I get a copy of that?
Phoebe: Thats right, you just enjoy.
Monica: Oh God Phoebe!! (Phoebe covers one ear.) Oh thats it! Thats it! Right there! Oh! (Tries to cover the other ear.) Ooooh-oooh-ooooh (Covers both ears and continues the massage with her elbows.)
Chandler: I dont know! What could she possibly be hiding in here that I cant see?!
Rachel: Yes! Yes! I got half a mind to contract that doctors uterus though. Mild discomfort, whats he talking about?
Joey: Uh, really good. Really good. Yeah, I should be ready to kill myself any day now. (Chandler returns with a bobby pin and hands it to Joey.) Wow, you sure found that quick. (He tries the pin in the lock.) I justI wish I didnt feel this way about Rachel anymore, yknow? I wish things could go back to normal. I mean, I love living with her and God, helping out with the baby is just amazing, but now I think I think Ross feels left out. Yknow? When I had to take Rachel to the hospital, the doctor thought I was the father. God You shouldve seen the look on Rosss face. (Pause) By the way, I have no idea what Im doing here. For all I know Im just locking it more. Oh hey, did you try opening it with a credit card?
Chandler: Thats a good idea.
Monica: I gotta tell you, yesterday was amazing. That massage felt so good!
Phoebe: No-no, I got that.
Phoebe: No, you cant let this stop you from getting massages! No look, I have, I have lots of clients that make the same noises you do!
Rachel: Ohh! Thats so sweet of you! Oh yum! (Takes a bite out of the sandwich and starts to get sick.) Did you put pickles on this?
Rachel: Yeah, Ill be fine. But could someone please make sure that sandwich is gone when I get out there?
Joey: Oh no-no, no-no I love living with you. It just seems that if youre gonna have a roommate, yknow it might as well be the father.
Rachel: But Joey, I dont think Ross wants me to move into his apartment and disrupt his life like that. I mean(Ross turns to her with wishful eyes.)Or he does.
Ross: Oh Rach thats great. Thats great. (They hug and Joey breathes a sigh of relief.)
Chandler: No, honey youre not sick! Look, I dont love you because youre organized, I love you in spite of that.
Chandler: Yes! And look, now that I know if I got some extra stuff lying around can we, can we share the closet.
Joey: Are you kidding me? Im great! Yeah, Im uh; Im better than great. I am good. And now that shes gone, I can uh, I can do all this stuff around here that I couldnt do before. Yknow? Like umm, I can walk around naked again. Yknow? I can uh, I can watch porn in the living room. Right? This is uh, this is good for me. Yknow? I like being on my own, Im uh, better off this way. Im uh, a lone wolf. Yknow? A loner. Alone. All alone. Forever. Whats a wolf got to do to get a huh around here?! (Chandler rushes over and hugs him.)
Phoebe: Thats it. Just relax.
Phoebe: Yeah, you like that dont you?
Joshua: I-I gotta say, I-I-I-Im not too sure I agree with that.
Joey: Come on, season tickets! Season tickets, do you know what that means?
ROSS: Great, great, and I miss that too, I miss everything.
Rachel: Is that the heartbeat?
Phoebe: What is that?
Phoebe: Sure! Look, ok, bottom line: I love Mike... David! David. I love David. Don't look at me that way, Roseanne Rosannadanna!
Phoebe: You’re just so mean to each other! And I don’t want to end up like that with Rachel. I still like you!
Chandler: Oh, yeah. I'd marry him just for his David Hasselhof impression alone. You know I'm gonna be doing that at parties, right? (Does the impression)
Joey: Thats horrible! Well, you did the right thing man.
Rachel: Hey Joey, what would you do if someone that you slept with told you that she was pregnant?
Joey: Well, I just tape it to the back of my toilet tank. (realises that anyone could have overheard that) I didn't say that! It's in a bank guarded by robots!
Joey: We could get that Everest video though.
Joey: (shocked) Thats mean! You really had me going there!
JOEY: Let me get that. (to Chandler) You got five bucks?
Monica: Yeah. Run ten blocks, thatll help the smell.
Phoebe: That would be great. Thank you.
Joey: That was one good minute!
MR. GREENE: Did you know your mother spent $1200 dollars on bansai trees. I felt like Gulliver around that place.
Rachel: (to Ross) Yes! Did you see that?
WAITER: (whispers) And what will that be on the side of?
Phoebe: I'll have to get back to you on that. Okay, bye! (Hangs up.) Oh my God! He wants me to come over and feel his bicep and more!
Chandler: See? Now, thats why only the little fake men are supposed to do all the kicking.
Monica: Im fine. (She goes into one of those half sneezing, half-coughing fits that you get with a bad cold or flu.)
Chandler: Sorry, I just cant sleep. Ooh! (Turns on the light and Monica groans.) Where is that book that you are reading with the two women who were ice-skating and wearing, wearing those hats with the flowers on it? Because every time I look at that cover Im like (Fake snores.)
Chandler: (to Ross) All right listen, I have to go to the bathroom, but if the place with the big fish comes up again. Id like know whether thats several big fish or just one big fish.
Rachel: No. No-no-no-no, no. I mean, don't do that. Not, I mean not for me.
Phoebe: Yeah, I wanted to call and tell you that there's no hard feelings for firing me.
Tim: No-no really, was-was that not okay?
Phoebe: Okay, scarfs done. (Its not really a scarf, its just a bunch of yarn that Phoebe has tied together. Just then, Ross and Emily enter dragging with them Joey and Chandler.)
Monica: Wow, so you guys are, you're never gonna be in the same room together? How is that even gonna work?
Ross: Hey, uh, you can ignore that.
Monica: Rach, you know that birthing tape you wanted to see? Its here.
Chandler: Hey, you know who used to have nails like that?
Chandler: I didnt know that.
Ross: You know what? That is a very good idea. I'm gonna go make a pitcher of Margaritas.
Rachel: Yeah, thats true.
Joey: Id love to show ya, but I just tucked her in. Shes sleeping. (The women both laugh) Hey uh, would you two girls like to go for a drink? (Just then the same guy with the football dives to make a catch, lands on the car cover, and collapses it. It turns out that Joey set up a bunch of boxes to make it look like a Porsche.)
Chandler: Well, I thought that would be the best thing to do.
Rachel: So that there will be a decent place for me to sit.
David: That reminds me of you so much, I mean umm, it-its actually of Lenin. But, yknow at certain angles
Chandler: Look, weve always talked about having babies someday. Im not saying it has to be right now, but Im starting to think that we can handle it. Were good. Were really good.
Ross: Nothing, its just that hypnosis is beyond crap.
Chandler: Come on, let me see that smile.
Ross: Oh, that's great, that is great! (Hugs and kisses Carol. Then picks up a picture frame)
Monica: (to Ross) I can't believe you did that.
Rachel: Oh-oh, thats a risky little game!
Chandler: Pheebs, I dont understand. How can you have a roommate that none of us know anything about?
Phoebe: Thats good, you should be impulsive and you should be romantic. Just you did it with the wrong person. (He looks at her.) What?
Ross: No, no, thats funny. But maybe its time to move on, let it go, yknow? Stop it! Besides, Rachel is going out with Elizabeths father, so ah, hes much older than she is. Looks like Im not the only one interested in fossils, huh?
Chandler: Yes, I realise that.
Monica: Oh. Well, I didn't realize that you needed it back right away. I mean, you told me to go and be a caterer. So I went. I beed. I mean, I... I used it to buy all this stuff. But lookI've got another job tomorrow, so I'll pay you back with the money I make from that.
Rachel: Oh, that is so sweet!
(They move to kiss, but realise that Chandler is staring at them. Chandler urges them on.)
Phoebe: Yeah but why didn't you just say that you didn't read the book?!
Phoebe: Oh wait! That can't be the one Rachel's talking about. She didn't even know that happened. So which one was it?
Rachel: Oh Phoebe, we forgot that party we have to go to.
Joey: Hey Rach listen, did you know that during pregnancy your fingers swell up to twice their size and never go back.
Chandler: Sometimes I wish I was a lesbian... (They all stare at him.) Did I say that out loud?
Rachel: Ive never done that.
Ross: That is really nice lying! No way is that the reason!
Ross: Ohh! That would be great.
Rachel: That is not a problem.
Chandler: Oh, so thats this is gonna work now? Youre just gonna order me around all the time?
Joey: All right, let's do it! 5 hour flight with Charlie, have a couple of drinks, get under that blanket and do what comes naturally.
Ross: (To Chandler) You made out with Missy Goldberg. How could you do that, after you promised me?
Rachel: I am feeling nothing. Speaking of hot, watching you do that really makes me want to have sex with you.
Chandler: Oh yes, and thats what I want a roommate that I can walk around with and be referred to as the funny one.
PHOEBE: I'm not done yet, OK. God. OK, if that goes well, they may even want to make an album.
Monica: Thats also like the tenth time you told us.
Chandler: Well, before we answer that, I think we should address the more important question. How dumb are you?
Monica: (upset) That was a terrible throw!!
Ross: No, thats all right.
Phoebe: No-no-no, but I am mad! I am mad! Because this stuff is everything that is wrong with the world! And its all sitting up in my living room and all I can think about is how I dont have that lamp!
Joey: Really, a shower huh? And uh, which-which room might that be?
Joey: Chandler. Will you see if your mom can give my resume to Dennis Phillips? Cause if I can get in a Broadway show then I wouldve done it all, film, television, and theater. The only think left would be radio, and thats just for ugly people.
Janine: (not sure of what to make of that) Okay.
Rachel: Yeah, Im pretty confident about that. Thats what makes it so easy for me to be 80% happy for Monica and Chandler! It would be nice to have a little guarantee though.
Rachel: Okay, well that�s now the third sign that I should not leave Emma.
Monica: Yeah, okay, give that a try!
Nurse: Well, you know your insurance will cover that.
Rachel: Alright, fine, you go ahead and you do that, alright Ross.
Monica: Wait a minute. What about that summer during college that you lived with grandma, and you tried to make it as a dancer?
Monica: But getting over was the hardest thing that Ive ever had to do. And I never let myself think about you.
RACHEL: Terry is a jerk, ok? That's why we're always saying "Terry's a jerk!" That's where that came from.
Ross: What?! No! No! Thats-thats time-out!
JOEY: That is so not my motto.
Rachel: Okay, that is all you.
Phoebe: Come on, play that funky music white boy.
Phoebe: Is that a real place? (Rachels stunned) Are they hiring?
Joey: But what does that gonna do...
Monica: Yes, I'm sure! Rachel is there something that you want to talk me about?
Phoebe: (noticing a guy sitting by the green post looking at her) Oh wait a second you guys for the last couple weeks Ive been that guy everywhere I go. We take the same bus. We go to the same bookstore, the same dry cleaners; maybe hes the tea guy. (He gets up to leave, and smiles at Phoebe.)
Rachel: Oh, yknow what? I cant. I have to have dinner with that Melissa girl.
Rachel: So you know, I I handed in that marketing report and I never got to hear what you thought.
Chandler: Yes! Two thousand dollars exactly! How do you know that! (Joey begins writing a cheque)
Chandler: You're not supposed to take that. Besides, it's a New Testament, what are you gonna do with it?
Phoebe: Not even if you just pretend that it's milk?
Phoebe: ...and then it goes back to the chorus... Smelly cat, Sme-lly ca-t / I-t's not your fau-lt. And that's the end of the song... I realise that you didn't ask to hear it, but uhm... no-one had spoken in seventeen minutes.
Phoebe: God. Do think it really doesnt hurt? Cause how can they do that?
Chandler: Thats Thats was