words in movies
(Chandler lets her into the apartment and reveals that Monica is getting a massage from another woman.)
Rachel: Oh Joey, Im so happy things worked out for us that were having this baby together. I love you so much.
Joey: Thats always appropriate! (Back to the matter at hand) Oh, okay. One more push! One more push!
Rachel: Aw, its unbelievable! Wow! She is kicking so much! Oh, shes like umm oh whos that kind of annoying girl soccer player?
Joey: Oh thats amazing. (Drops the sheet.)
Chandler: Okay. How about in that cabinet?
Monica: No! Thats where we keep the canned goods! Have you completely forgotten everything you learned at orientation?
Chandler: Oh yknow, Ive been living here a while and Ive never seen whats inside that closet. What is, what is in there?
Monica: Chandler, there is nothing in there that concerns you! If you love me you-youll let it go.
Monica: Thats different, we were roommates! And when?!
Monica: Okay, if it means that much to you
Rachel: Its not kicking right now. Although we would love to see you do (Mimics him) that again.
Ross: My God, the babys kicking. Thats great. Although I kinda wish I-I wouldve been there to feel the kicking for the first time yknow.
Joey: Wow! Can I get a copy of that?
Phoebe: Thats right, you just enjoy.
Monica: Oh God Phoebe!! (Phoebe covers one ear.) Oh thats it! Thats it! Right there! Oh! (Tries to cover the other ear.) Ooooh-oooh-ooooh (Covers both ears and continues the massage with her elbows.)
Chandler: I dont know! What could she possibly be hiding in here that I cant see?!
Rachel: Yes! Yes! I got half a mind to contract that doctors uterus though. Mild discomfort, whats he talking about?
Joey: Uh, really good. Really good. Yeah, I should be ready to kill myself any day now. (Chandler returns with a bobby pin and hands it to Joey.) Wow, you sure found that quick. (He tries the pin in the lock.) I justI wish I didnt feel this way about Rachel anymore, yknow? I wish things could go back to normal. I mean, I love living with her and God, helping out with the baby is just amazing, but now I think I think Ross feels left out. Yknow? When I had to take Rachel to the hospital, the doctor thought I was the father. God You shouldve seen the look on Rosss face. (Pause) By the way, I have no idea what Im doing here. For all I know Im just locking it more. Oh hey, did you try opening it with a credit card?
Chandler: Thats a good idea.
Monica: I gotta tell you, yesterday was amazing. That massage felt so good!
Phoebe: No-no, I got that.
Phoebe: No, you cant let this stop you from getting massages! No look, I have, I have lots of clients that make the same noises you do!
Rachel: Ohh! Thats so sweet of you! Oh yum! (Takes a bite out of the sandwich and starts to get sick.) Did you put pickles on this?
Rachel: Yeah, Ill be fine. But could someone please make sure that sandwich is gone when I get out there?
Joey: Oh no-no, no-no I love living with you. It just seems that if youre gonna have a roommate, yknow it might as well be the father.
Rachel: But Joey, I dont think Ross wants me to move into his apartment and disrupt his life like that. I mean(Ross turns to her with wishful eyes.)Or he does.
Ross: Oh Rach thats great. Thats great. (They hug and Joey breathes a sigh of relief.)
Chandler: No, honey youre not sick! Look, I dont love you because youre organized, I love you in spite of that.
Chandler: Yes! And look, now that I know if I got some extra stuff lying around can we, can we share the closet.
Joey: Are you kidding me? Im great! Yeah, Im uh; Im better than great. I am good. And now that shes gone, I can uh, I can do all this stuff around here that I couldnt do before. Yknow? Like umm, I can walk around naked again. Yknow? I can uh, I can watch porn in the living room. Right? This is uh, this is good for me. Yknow? I like being on my own, Im uh, better off this way. Im uh, a lone wolf. Yknow? A loner. Alone. All alone. Forever. Whats a wolf got to do to get a huh around here?! (Chandler rushes over and hugs him.)
Phoebe: Thats it. Just relax.
Phoebe: Yeah, you like that dont you?
Chandler: You believe that this guy is destined for someone else and youre still gonna date him?
Phoebe: Then thats not breaking the law! Im there!
Chandler: They...do that?
Chandler: If its not, then theres two of them. And that would mean its the end of the world!
Chandler: God why why would you want to do that to yourself!?
Monica: I thought I was something that we both wanted!
Joey: (very excited) A TV as if it appears from nowhere! Thats the dream! Man, how did you afford this stuff?
Mike: I want to live with you too! Let's do that!
Joey: Thats help spelled backwards so that the helicopters can read it from the air!
CHANDLER: I don't know what to say. I'm sorry that we make more money than you. But we're not gonna feel guilty about it. We work really hard for it.
Joey: What, oh, oh, oh, no, no, I cant, I cant tell you that, its like the most awful, horrible thing Ive ever done my whole life.
(Turns to look at Professor Sherman, only to discover that he is sleeping)
Rachel: All right, all right, you're right, I won't do anything with Joey, I just thought that we (Joey enters the hall) Ok so that would be two cups of tarragon, one pound of baking soda and one red onion? (Joey enters his apartment)
Rachel: Oh, no! Who did that?
Rachel: Im not saying that Im a lesbian! Im just saying that this happened!
Chandler: This is exactly the kind of social situation that I am not comfortable with!
Phoebe: That was a test and you just failed.
Chandler: No-no-no! I am the king of bad Thanksgivings. You can't just swoop in here with your bad marriage and take that away from me.
Chandler: I believe I read that somewhere!
Kathy: Ohh, God, guys, check it out, you can see that girl's underwear!
Phoebe: Yeah, ooh, I like that! Yeah. Wait! How do you know about bah-bah-bha-bhan?
Phoebe: So go fix it! Go find Chandler! He's probably up in your room! Tell him that you're sorry and that you love him.
JOEY: Thanks Ross. I really like that bird though...I'll take the dog though.
Monica: Who's that? (goes to open door)
Chandler: Ooh, Lambchop. How old is that sock? If I had a sock on my hand for thirty years it'd be talking too.
Rachel: (stopping him) Hey! You cant leave Joey! You agreed to buy that boat, all right?! That is a contract! And plus if you leave, my boss is gonna kill me!
Joey: Alright!! Fine! It's original Hugsy! No, now I know that Emma wants him but he's mine and I need him..
Phoebe: I know, I want that too, but IS that going to make it too hard?
Monica: That I was going to eat him.
Joey: Howd you get over that teacher?
Phoebe: Well, how-how-how is that possible? You barely know her!
Ross: You can't go, I mean you're the glue that holds this group together!
Chandler: Ooh, I hate when my father calls me that.
Joey: (concerned) Oh. Whats, whats going on? Is it mom? Is she sick? Is it dads heart? Is that a sandwich?
Joey: Baby shower. Wow! That sounds sooo like something I dont want to do! Later! (Finally, he makes his exit.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, Chandler, and Joey are there as Monica enters with the local paper that has the engagement picture in it.]
Rachel: No Phoebe! You cannot get the phone that way; thats not fair! Okay look, I have an idea. Why dont we, why dont we see what kind of number he has on his speed dial, and then from that we can tell who has more in common with him. And then whoever does gets the phone.
Monica: Oh my God, what a fun day! That sounds great!
Rachel: Well, why do yknow go in that room (points to the room Ross is in) and do your homework?
Monica: Well,fall out of it. You know, you shouldn't even be here, it's a school night. Oh god, oh god. I'm like those women that you see with shiny guys named Chad. I'm Joan Collins.
Phoebe: Oh well, as long as it is under control, you know, you can't do anything about it, he's already dating her, and she is a nice person, that wouldn't be right.
Phoebe Sr: I mean, I know what Im talking about. I gave up two babies, and I only wish I had someone there that had given up babies, that could tell me how terrible it is to give up babies. I just think that, it would be something you will regret every single day for the rest of your life. So, how ever hard it is to give up this puppy, it would be like a million times harder to give up a child. (Phoebe is playing with the puppy again, and not listening) I really shouldnt have given you the puppy first.
Monica: (smiling)That was a good day!
Phoebe: Im just saying, get his number just in case. But no Chandler is in an accident and cant perform sexually and he would want you to take a lover to satisfy the needs that he can no longer fulfill.
Ross: Yeah, I uh, totally forgot about that. You mind if I take a rain check? I'm waiting for a call from Emily.
Ross: (tries to be sexy too) Well that depends ... have you been a baaad gi .. (stops) no I can't.
Ross: Ok, I've heard myself on tape and I sound nothing like that.
Rachel: (touched) You would do that? I never get picked!
Chandler: I pity the fool who puts on my jewelry, I do, I do. I pity the fool that. . . [turns around and sees Joey] Hi!
Joey: (watching the discussion) Hey Chandler, do we know that lady?
PHOEBE: Oh that looks so good, oh I love it.
Ross: You know what, I'm sure your wish is gonna come true, but, you guys - just in case, maybe a genie will come out if we rub this lamp! (rubs lamp, stops because it's very hot) Ah!! That thing gets hot!!
Chandler: (to Drew) Oh, by the way, that is her full name.
Ross: Yeah. Right. Save it. I can do that. (Gets up and does a little kara-tay.)
Phoebe: Well, I bet that was very hard for him to do.
Chandler: I got that!
Rachel: Ok, Pheebs, you know what, if we had that, we wouldn't be doing the ritual in the first place.
Caitlin: No actually umm, I think that they're umm, gas.
Julie: Yes. Oh my god, are you kidding? Ross is so crazy about you, and I really wanted you to like me, and, it's probably me being totally paranoid, but I kinda got the feeling that maybe you don't.
Rachel: (to Ross) Isn't that amazing?
MNCA: See? They're as different as night and... later that night.
Joey: I know! I know! Come on, please-please you guys, dont-dont be mad. Im sure she just, she just said that stuff because she was nervous and you guys are like my best friends! Yknow? And it was our first date! Plus, shes really sick!
Phoebe: You know, did you ride mopeds? 'Cause I've heard... (they stare at her)... oh, I see... it's not about that right now. OK.
Joey: I kn-I know! I know! Okay? And apparently tomorrow when I go in to meet the director I have to take off my clothes so that they can see what my body looks like.
Rachel: What?! She just called and said that she was gonna be working late! She keeps lying to me! That's it! Y'know what? I'm just gonna go over there and confront them right now!
Rachel: Yeah, that was an awesome day!
Monica: Oh, I guess we could try that, but... it seems so harsh! (to Chandler) Have you ever done that?
Chandler: Are you really that busy?
Rachel: Y'know what else is really great about him, oh, what is the word for the adult that doesn't have dinosaur toys in their bedroom?
Joanna: You know, Junior Miss is where I started. Oh, I had to sleep with the ugliest guy to get that job.
Actress/Olivia: Don't say that...
Chandler: You hear that! That is her chose, mister Ill let you have her! I win! You suck! I rule all! A mini-wave in celebration of me!! (does the wave.)
Chandler: Joey? Got you a Joey Special, two pizzas! Joe? (The phone rings and he answers it) (On phone) Hello? (Takes the phone away from his mouth when he realizes what he just did and yells.) Damnit! (Back on phone.) Hello? (Listens.) No, Joeys not here right now, but I can take a message I think. (Listens) Hes still got a chance for the part?! Oh, thats great news! (Listens) Well no obviously not for the actor who was mauled by his dog. (Listens) Oh well, thats great. I will give Joey the message. Thank you! (Hangs up and goes to write the message on the Magna-Doodle.) Yes! (Reading what hes writing) Okay, Mac audition at 2:00. Allergy actor attacked. (Pause) By dog not flowers.
Monica: All right, Im gonna show you something a lot of guys dont know. Rach, give me that pad, please? (She does so and Monica starts drawing on it) All right. Now
Chandler: All right, I'll tell ya what, the next time you ask me a question like that I'll lie.
Rachel: I cannot, I cannot believe that I invited you here today.
Joey: Oh, yeah, with the mug painting. Yeah. I was so listening to that. But ah, y'know what, I think I kinda need to work on my stuff tonight.
Rachel: So do you think that my dream means anything?
Ross: Who gets whom. (They all look at him.) I dont know why I do that.
Rachel: Ok, we're still on that.
Joey: Yeah, yeah. Hey, why dont you give a pull on that rope? (Points.)
Joey: I was tryin to make a sale!! Oh, man, if I ever run into that guy again, do you know what Im gonna do?
Ross: (running into the hall, in slow motion) You'll never get me, Joe!!! (he then pretends that he gets shot repeatedly and falls back against Joey and Chandler's door, dead.)
Rachel: So what do you say we make a pact? If you and I are both single by the time were 40, we get married. I mean, we know each other, we like each other, and weve-weve already slept together so yknow therell be no surprises there! You know what I mean? No like, "Whats that?!"
Phoebe: No!! No way! No! And stop using my name! And shame on you! (Yells into the apartment) And shame on all of you! Youre disgusting! Especially you (points to someone) with that! (Storms away.)
Rachel: What...that scene I saw was so good!
Joey: So...I've never played that!
Joey: Thats her! Okay, come on! (They go over and open the door.)
Rachel: It just might be too hard, given the history and all that
Rachel: Huh. Well, y'know thats actually a really good idea, because that way theyll be closer to the mugs. Y'know what, you should have the other waitresses do that too.
Joey: Like this. (pointing to the picture) Pictures of cute babies we dont know. We..we cant have that.
Rachel: (starting to cry) Im-Im sorry, I just thought that
Ross: What? How come that you don't have to go!
Monica: What's so bad about that?
Chandler: If they cant find a home for her, they kill her! And Im not gonna let that happen to little Yasmine!
Joey: That�s a great story�can I eat it?
Rachel: You do that every year??
Rachel: Oh, that's why you got these tickets to that play, to get rid of us??
Phoebe: Oh. Okay, well I-I was kinda hoping that I would just be alone yknow to think about my mom and her suicide.
Phoebe: Oh, you like that? You should hear my phone number.