words in movies
Matthew: Our energy just comes way up when theres an audience here and when that happens, something happens between your brain and your mouth sometimes and it just doesnt, it just doesnt work.
Phoebe: So, we realize thatOh no (She resets herself) Im telling it! Im telling it (She loses it.)
The Director: Watch again that hand.
Courtney: Oh! Okay! Im gonna try it without the coffee cup cause I think its the left hand thats messing me up.
Lisa: Do I? Absolutely. Absolutely. Yeah, thats your fault. I say.
David: Ahh! Sh(Beep)it that hurt!
Joey: Oh yeah? Then how come I keep(He notices that the marker board they use has been left on the entertainment center and holds up his discovery.)
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, The One With George Stephanopoulos, Phoebe is showing Monica and Rachel that she brought Operation to their slumber party.]
[Cut to Central Perk, to the theme from The Dick Van Dyke show Joey runs into Central Perk carrying a stack of Soap Opera Digests and falls on the step. He does bounce right back up making it all that much funnier.]
(As shes saying that Joey is to pull out a chair and sit down, only Matthew comes running in from off camera and dives for the same chair.)
Conan: Matthew, you have a reputation with the rest of the cast that sometimes you like to, you like to fool around a bit. I mean like if somethings naturally going wrong you like to get in there and juice it a little bit. True or false?
[Cut to that same kitchen, only this is The One With The Proposal, Richard is telling Monica something.]
Monica: Well, it was good to see you too. Did you come down here to tell me that?
Jennifer: That damn monkey.
Conan: That damn monkey.
Rachel: Okay. Okay, see now the one with the feather boa? Thats Dr. Francis. She used to be a man. Oh look! There(Marcel (Katie) jumps away)Okay. (And runs behind her on the back of the couch for a little while.)
Matt: Thats a good one? (They both laugh.)
Matthew: Thats gross.
David: Where the story was that I was anticipating that I would be around to hear my sons first words spoken. But the scene was about that he wasnt supposed to be able to speak and, uh for some reason when we started doing the show
Matt: And then sometimes during the show yknow but youre like, the scenes going one way but youre just tempted to say something another time. Like, do you remember that one where Monicas baking cookies in our old apartment?
Matt: Yeah, shes trying to waft the smell across the hall to get us to come hang out in her new place, and were sitting there eating pizza and I think it was you (Points to Lisa) that said
Conan: But audiencesYou have a live studio audience and they must love that. They must love it when they see you guys playing.
Conan: So that you will intentionally do something thattheyll-theyll intentionally screw it up?
Conan: I-I heard some of you guys talking about this earlier, but sometimes theres just a word that someone has to say that youll get hung up on. And itll justthe way you say the word is funny to everybody else.
Ross: That tastes like feet!
Ross: That tastes like feet!
Monica: Are you saying that you dont want to get with this?
David: Yeah, Rachel, Chandler, and Ross had to try to get a couch up a staira very narrow New York stairwell and that was probably I-I think it was the hardest Ive-Ive laughed in my life period.
Conan: Youve done over 150 episodes, but your favorite moments that 80 years from now youll be thinking about?
David: That is too much!
Matthew: Let me start that again.
Rachel: What? Uhh, Phoebe, honey, honey, I know you're quirky and I get a big kick out of it, we all do actually, but if you destroy a coat like this that is like a crime against nature! Not nature, fashion!
Cheryl: Oh, yeah. Oh, you know, that's too bad that didn't work out.
Ross: Or that.
Lauren: Oh but then, they went and dropped you down that elevator shaft.
Rachel: Okay, I heard that.
Chandler: That is a bad interview.
Rachel: I dont know, his uh, his hair never really bothered me that much, and yknow it was always more crunchy than it was greasy.
RACHEL: That is so unfair.
Rachel: You know how much I love that T-shirt! You never even where that T-shirt!
Joey: Me too. I mean I havent thought at all about how I put myself out there and said all that stuff and how you didnt feel the same way about me and-and how it was really awkward.
JOEY: Well OK then. [oven timer goes off behind Chandler] Was that the oven timer?
Tour Guide: Thats just the way it is.
Rachel: How would you like to sit in a chair that fully reclines, has a rolling massage, and speakers in the head rest?
Emily: Ross, are you there? Ross, I dont know if you can hear this but (Ross has moved to the window, apparently so that he can hear better.) Im gonna talk anyway, uh, Im in the States with you sister and your friends and its all over with Colin. I came here to tell you that, and to tell youYes, Joey you can have all the chocolate you want, just take it! Uh, I came here to tell you that I love you.
Phoebe: Yeah that was lucrative! Smart like your brother!
Chandler: All my energy is going into not asking that question. I cant believe I screwed this up!
Gunther: That guy (points) has been waiting for his coffee for ten minutes! Hes complained about you three times! (He hands the coffee cup to Joey, assuming that Joey will deliver it and walks away.)
Phoebe: (after he's gone) I am so sorry you got caught in the middle of that. I didn't mean to be so out there. I am furious with him!
Chandler: When did that happen to you?!
Rachel: Well, honey that was pretty obvious.
Monica: That was unbelievable!
Phoebe: That chick can't handle my corner.
Rachel: Y'know what? I think we can just leave it at that. It's kinda like a symbolic gesture...
Phoebe: Oh yes, yes, yes you can. Just say, um, 'Phoebe, my work is my life and that's what I have to do right now'. And I say 'your work?! Your work?! How can you say that?!'. And then you say, um, 'it's tearing me apart, but I have no choice. Can't you understand that?'. And I say (Hits him) 'no! No! I can't understand that!'.
Chandler: Look, we just think that maybe she's being a little unreasonable.
Chandler: Phoebe thinks you and Don are soul mates, and I dont believe in that kind of stuff. But then you two totally get along. So look, I wont stand in your way if you want to run off with Don and live in a house of cheese.
Monica: (to Phoebe) You start working on that list. (She grabs her coat and leaves, too.)
Phoebe: Okay, now would you say that thats more than 50 yards away from Sting, his wife, or a member of his family?
(She puts her hands over her breasts and indicates that the coworkers boob job resulted in one pointing up and one pointing down with her hands by pointing up with one hand and down with the other.)
Monica: (on phone) Uh, Michelle. Yeah, that was me, I-I dialed your number by mistake. (listens) Oh, you're so sweet. Yeah, we were a great couple. I know I really miss him. Well, you know how it is, it's that....
The Doctor: It says here that the knife went right through your shoe.
Rachel: Thats weird, she locked the door.
Frank: Yeah, and they-and they say that our-that our only chance to have a baby is that if they take my sperm, her egg and put it together in a dish and then put it into another girl. So we were wondering if you could be the girl that we could put it into.
CHANDLER: Oh no no no no, no no no no no no, you see, what I had planned shouldn't take more that 2, 3 minutes tops.
JOEY: Yeah, there's just one thing that might be kind've a problem. See, I, uh, had to kiss this guy.
Phoebe: Okay but thats why you have to buy it, so it can fulfil its Christmas destiny, otherwise there gonna throw it into the chipper. Tell him, Joey
Joey: I cant! Yknow? You guys dont know what its like to put yourself out there like that and just get shot down.
Chandler: Well yeah! But now that I know that youre having these thoughts, Im back to panic, anxiety, and uh Im definitely gonna need some kind of sports drink.
Rachel: Oh, thats veryReally very-very okay.
Chandler: No. No, not at all, thats-thats ridiculous.
Joey: What youdont hold it like that! Youre lettin all the good stuff fall out.
Mrs. Tribbiani: Me? I'm fine. Look, honey, in an ideal world, there'd be no her, and your father would look like Sting. And I'll tell you something else. Ever since that poodle-stuffer came along, he's been so ashamed of himself that he's been more attentive, he's been more loving... I mean, it's like every day's our anniversary.
Joey: Aww thats nice. Family should be there, huh? This is her wedding, happiest day of her life.
Gary Collins: (on TV.) It looks like we have surpassed last year's pledge total! Thank you viewers! The pledge that did it was taken by one of our volunteers (He walks over to where Joey is sitting.) Oh boy! And may I say one of our sharpest dressed volunteers, (Joey stands up.) Mr. Joseph Tribbiani!
Monica: Honey, as we get closer to the wedding, is there anything that you would like to talk about or share?
Ross: Hey, can I, can I get in on that? Because Im kinda hungry myself.
ROSS: Um-hmm. [puts them on] I have a condition, apparently, that I require two different sets of focals.
Rachel: Oh, between you telling him that I wanted to have a fling and me putting out on the first dateoh, hes so gonna get the wrong idea.
Chandler: (rushing up) Hey-Hey-Hey! Who was that?
Ross: So thats the only reason she could be here huh? It couldnt have anything to do with the fact that-that maybe Im a good listener and I uh I put on a great slide show!
Carol: Ross? That opens my cervix. (He drops it in horror.)
Rachel: That really is something; that's really cool.
Joey: Well, then it wouldn't be a secret. So yeah, that would be okay. Yeah. Yeah!
Rachel: I can't believe you would say that!
Chandler: Oh, well, thats great!
Ross: First of all its Professor Pittain! And second of all, that little bone, proved that, that particular dinosaur had wings, but didnt fly.
Ross: (breaking the hug) Ohh, I gotta go to the flower store! (Runs to the door.) Check it out, no one will tell me where Emily is, so I'm gonna send 72 long-stem, red roses to Emily's parent's house, one for each day that I've known and loved her. That oughta get her talking to me again.
Both: We can't do that. (They separate.)
Monica: What was that?
Phoebe: It's nice that he has someone.
Monica: Yes! Yes! And I think that the first gift that Rachel opens should be from the grandmother of the baby, because youre the most important person in this room. And in the world!
Joey: (from the bedroom) I can hear that!
CHANDLER: (hushed) No, no, no, no, no.� Joey can't know that I'm here.
Monica: All right, Ill take one box of the mint treasures, just one, and thats it. I-I started gaining weight after I joined the Brown Birds. (to Ross) Remember, how Dad bought all my boxes and I ate them all?
Chandler: (angrily) Is that supposed to be funny! I was really worried over here!
Monica: Now I'm guessing that he bought her the big pipe organ, and she's really not happy about it.
Ken: That�s right. Is it true, that the reason you are here in Tulsa is that you fell asleep in a meeting and took the job without realizing what you were saying yes to?
Chandler: Well, were really not that close. (Pause) Okay, so I guess this is uh, good-bye then.
Joey: Well whats fun about that? You expect me to be the host of a boring game thats just people standing around answering questions?
MONICA: But I need it. Otherwords I'm gonna have to take that horrible diner job. You know, with the dancing and the costumes. I don't wanna have to wear flame retardant boobs.
Joey: Dont answer that.
Joey: She's probably exhausted from all that adorable screaming she did last night.
Rachel: All right, I like that.
Joey: Look, Im telling you if I put my hand on my stomach right here (He puts his hand down his pants, like Al Bundy on Married With Children always used to do.) it doesnt hurt that bad.
Joshua: Okay, thats-thats not funny. Uhh.
Dina: Do you ever worry that youll be walking and your baby will just like slip out?
Ross: I didnt give her that ring!
Chandler: Is it wrong that I was totally aroused by that?
Phoebe: Yeah, I thought I had one a couple of minutes ago, and now I know that was definitely one.
Chandler: [mocks that last comment].
Phoebe: Okay, umm, question 2) Umm, did that marriage end A. Happily, B. Medium, or C. In the total abandonment of her and her two children?
Phoebe: Ross, its not that big a deal! So youll been divorced three times, youll still have a life, youll go on dates
Dana: Apparently Howies editing now. Yeah, he-he-he calls me up and asks me if he can edit my new movie. Can you believe that?! Yknow I-I-I havent spoken to him in like ten years and he asks me for a favor!
Chandler: Does that mean I get the good loving tonight?
Rachel: Oh, hon can you grab me my other box of tissues? Theyre right on that chair under Rosss coat.
Chandler: I can't believe you would actually say that. I would much rather be Mr.Peanut than Mr.Salty.
Chandler: Oh, okay, I have condom in my wallet that I've had since I was twelve.
Monica: That was some hot love you gave me! I'm gonna go get ready.
Ross: Yeah, and I'm responsible for just like half of that.
Monica: You got a present for my parents. Thats so sweet.
Phoebe: That was my dad!
Joey: Well, its complicated. Shes with this other guy. For a long time. Someone from work, too. And I could never do that to the guy, because were really good friends.
>>> Joey's Subconscious So this is going pretty good. dinner was nice, got a lot in common. (Sees a magazine) Victoria's secret huh we even like the same books. (Walks over to a painting on the wall) Oh now there's a scary painting. wait a minute I think I've been scared by that painting before. (Looks around) You know what this whole place look familiar I have definitely been in this apartment I know I've seen this weird plant before (it's a cactus and he touch's it) AWCH! It did that the last time. Oh my god, I've gone out with this girl before yeah we had sex on this couch and then on that chair and no. no we didn't do it hear which is weird because it seems like a perfectly good place.
Joey: Oh, that poor bastard.
Ross: Is that funny? Am I supposed to be laughing?
Ross: Is that what I want?
Rachel: Say more things like that.
Mr. Geller: (ignoring her) Well, Id gotten Judy pregnant. I still dont know that happened.
Susan: Oh, look at that.
Chandler: That would be impossible to resist if you werent all drippy here. (Points to his nose.)