words in movies
Chandler: Where did you, when did you, how did you... (Joey hits the back of Chandler's head) How did you get a girl like that?
Chandler: Well, I have a call in about that.
Rachel: Huh. Well, then you'd better keep it away from Ross's hair. So this is pretty rare. How did you get that?
Chandler: It doesn't say that. Does it?
Chandler: Okay, all right, I'll just uh, make sure that uh, Joey gets her something really great.
Phoebe: It's gotta be better than that book. Oo! Like a crossbow!
Monica: Because I don't have the money or the equipment to handle something that big on such short notice. I mean there's no way.
Rachel: No! I'm sorry, honey, it's just that last week I got all but three answers and I really want to finish a whole one without any help.
Monica: Oh my God, it was the best funeral ever! I mean, everyone loved the food, and guess what? I even got another funeral for tomorrowthe dead-guy-from-today's best friend. I mean, it is like I am the official caterer for that accident!
Monica: Oh. Well, I didn't realize that you needed it back right away. I mean, you told me to go and be a caterer. So I went. I beed. I mean, I... I used it to buy all this stuff. But lookI've got another job tomorrow, so I'll pay you back with the money I make from that.
Rachel: And you know which one we should see? The 1996 Tony award winner. Do you happen to know the name of that one?
Chandler: Huh-huh! You can't give her that.
Rachel: Okay, honey, what he means by that, is ...while this is a very nice gift, maybe it's just not something a boyfriend gives?
Joey: Or... just get a card that has a poem already in it.
Phoebe: Pay the caterer! Look, I've had a lot of jobs, okay, and there are some people who just always try to get out of paying. It's either, you know, "that massage wasn't long enough, or, "I don't recognize any of those songs," or, you know, "these sombreros aren't big enough. Bad little white girl!"
Joey: So, you just left? Her place was really that bad?
Ross: Well, like that, only instead of a chair, it's a pile of garbage. And instead of a jacket, it's a pile of garbage. And instead of the end of the day, it's the end of time, and garbage is all that has survived! (Ross takes the loosely tied tie off and hands it to Joey who puts it on.) Here.
Ross: No, I tried that. She says it has a weird smell.
Joey: All right! Now you go get that beautiful pig! (Ross hesitates, looks unsure) Oink!
Chandler: Okay, all right. I just spent the entire afternoon looking for a present for Kathy that would be better than the rabbit.
Rachel: All right, look. Why don't you just return the book, let Joey give her the clock pen, and you give her something worse than that. Like... a regular pen.
Joey: You got it. Thanks man. Thanks for doing this, I owe you one. (Joey leaves, comes back in.) Oh, hey! There wasn't any change from that twenty, was there?
Phoebe: Excuse me. Excuse me! (Mrs. Bukart stops singing) Thanks. Um, clearly this is a very, very hard time for you. Um, but, um, we provided a service, and we deserve to be paid because you ate that service, and, um, we are not leaving here until we're paid every penny. 'Cause you know what, lady? We're part time caterers, and we have no place else to go.
Chandler: Oh, uh, yeah... I just knew that sometimes when you're writing, you... you don't always know the exact time.
Chandler: (tongue-tied) Uhl..ell. By the way, in case you missed that, that sound was, "Uhl, ell."
Kathy: You must really like... Joey... to go to all that trouble for him.
Joey: (opening bedroom door) Hey, that coupon expires, you know.
Cheryl: Oh, yeah. Oh, you know, that's too bad that didn't work out.
Gavin: Thank god you finally said that, I saw you make a note on your pad three hours ago. (Rachel throws away that paper) Man, I really bug you, don't I?
[The next flashback is from The One Where Eddie Moves In. It's the sequence where Joey and Chandler are both saddened that they're not living together anymore. All By Myself is playing in the background.]
Charlie: Actually, you know, Joey is your friend, and you don't really know me that well; it would be weird.
Roy: I don't know... I can make my pecs dance... I can pick up a dollar bill with my butt cheeks... I can go to that special place inside me where I feel no shame.
Kate: Happy?! Is that what Im supposed to be Vic? Happy?
Rachel: Well, they uh, they-they do more than that.
Rachel: Yes, I realize that
Rachel: We just uh, we just met at the newsstand. We both grabbed for the last Field & Stream. (Chandlers shocked.) What? I read that.
Phoebe: Oh yeah, thats right, the keyboards, huh?
Joey: Listen, I ah, went to that restaurant that you were talking about last week...
Joanna: What?! What would make you think that?
Rachel: Hi! Yknow what honey, were actually out of candy right now. But someone just went out to get some and I have been giving out money but Im out of that too. Hey, can I write you a check?
Monica: What, that little thing at the prom?
Joey: Oh, see thats where youre wrong. Whatever it is I can do it. And if didnt see it up there, just-just try me.
Joey: Well, we could do that!
MONICA: No no, the father can, but um, since I am the roommate I can tell you that she's not here and I'll pass along the message, ok. So bye-bye.
Monica: Well, I don't know... I-It's... just the way you say it... I mean, you're funny... You have that funny thing. You're a funny guy! (Chandler turns to Joey)
Sophie: You brought a picnic, oh, what a boyfriend. Thats it, on Monday I start wearing make-up.
Chandler: How is that ever going to happen?!
Monica: Thats not even a word! I can get this! I can get this!
Rachel: Noooo... look, all I know is that I cannot wait a week until I see him. I mean, this is just too big. Y'know, I just, I've just gotta talk to him. I... I gotta... OK, I'll see you later. (opens door)
Pete: Okay, thats great, but can we make it smaller? Can we make it fit on the head of a pin? I love when we make things fit on the head of a pin.
Joey: Yeah, yeah... Absolutely. I mean, just because something's difficult doesn't mean that you quit.
Chandler: And thats the Chrysler Building right there.
Joey: Oh my God! Is that why you guys had to get married?!
Ross: But, what�s great is that you don�t mind talking about it.
Joey: That tone will not make me go any faster.
Ross: Monica and I have a grandmother who died, you both went to her funeral, name that grandmother!
Monica: It's worse. The only thing that's getting me through is knowing that I'm gonna be seeing you soon. I think I may even try to get out of here early.
Chandler: All right, I have to get that, but no-no. (answering phone) Hello? (listens) (happily) Hi! Yeah listen, I'm, I'm in need of a stripper and I was told that you do that. (listens) Let me ask you this, what, what do you do for the extra hundred? (listens) So would I, would I have to provide the grapes?
Monica: Okay. That's okay. I-I know that you're very upset right now. I know, I know that wasn't about me.
Rachel: Ohhhh, sorry I missed that.
Monica: (hums for a while, then gives up, and in her head) If it bothers you that much, just go out and get the shoes. No. Don't do this. This is stupid! I don't have to prove anything, I'm gonna go get them...But then everyone will know. Unless I get them, and then wake up really early and put them back! ...I need help! (She buries her head in her pillow.)
Chandler: Well I think its safe to say that our friendship is effectively ruined.
A Male Customer: Hey, thats weird, todays my birthday too!
Chandler: Well, I dont really know what that is, but lets!!
Chandler: Well, does that mean that youre not going to wearing yours?
Rachel: Ooh, I was kinda hoping that wouldn't be an issue... [Scene: Monica's Apartment, everyone is there and watching a Spanish Soap on TV and are trying to figure out what is going on.]
Monica: Yeah, and yknow, if you could not mention to them that we live together, that would be great! (Quickly trying to change subjects), I was thinking we would eat around four.
(He takes a little piece of Sarah's dessert. At first he doesn't think it's that special, but then...)
Phoebe: Is that a problem?
Rachel: (shocked) They had to have that specially made?!
Joey: No-no-no-no-no-no-no-no Its okay, I mean Ilook Rach, I know I scared you off with that whole Naked Thursdays thing, but we dont have to do that!
Mrs. Green: Oh my look at that. Only three weeks to go, now have you picked your nanny yet? Now I dont want you to use your housekeeper cause it would just split her focus.
Monica: Well you-you did start that rumor about Ross making out with Mrs. Altman, our 50-year-old librarian.
The Waiter: Well, sure, that too.
CHANDLER: We don't need to remedy that.
Monica: Oh, um, I dont know if thats a good idea.
Mona: Oh yknow, I didnt think of it that way. Youre right. Youre right. So, can I ask you a question?
Chandler: I'm so sorry, but you should have a sign out there or something. Or at least whisper it to people when they come in the door. "Owen doesn't know he's adopted, and he also thinks that Santa is real."
The Director: (answering the phone) Hello. Oh! Its you. Just ah, just one-one sec. (to Joey and Kate) I am going to take this call. When I continue, I hope that there will appear on stage this magical thing that in the theatre we call, committing to the moment! (He goes to take the call.)
Rachel: Well that sounds fun too. (They hug.)
The Waiter: Well thats not true.
Ross: That is correct.
The Waiter: You found that handle, did ya?
Phoebe: (after a pause) Unless... Maybe it's too crazy about this... Alright so... you know, there is no future... but that doesn't mean we still can't have fun. You know what? Forget what I said.
Phoebe: Thank God, cause that hair on a baby
Rachel: Fancy soap? I thought we were savin that for the Pope!
Rachel: Thats easy for you to say, you werent almost just killed.
Chandler: Excuse me, look, we've been here for over an hour, and a lot of people less sick than my friend have gone in. I mean, that guy with the toe thing? Who's he sleeping with? (She slides the gladd panel over and Chandler talks through it in a loud voice.) Oh, c'mon Dora, don't be mad... I know we both said some things we didn't mean, but that doesn't mean we still don't love each other. (To the waiting room.) Y'know, I feel like I've lost her.. (She slides the panel back, he turns, and it takes him by surprise.) Ba-!
Joey: Whoa, that doesn't necessarily mean that he's breaking up with you.
Rachel: Well, however great she was I just cant afford that.
Rachel: (shakes her head) Alright, alright look, just uh... just try to remember how you felt when you were in love, and think about that when you're playing the scene.
Ross: Well, then that guy is in serious, serious trouble.
Rachel: (To Joey) I cant believe that you yelled at my boss! Im-Im gonna lose my job! What am I going to do?!
Chandler, Monica, and Rachel: Great!! Thats great!
Phoebe: Yeah, yknow what I noticed Rachel? He scares easy. Is that the kind of guy youd like to take to a ball? "Hey Sebastian, would you like to dance?" (Imitates him.) "Uhh, okayI gotta go!"
Ross: Im-Im not kidding. Look I-I, I cant have three failed marriages. I cant. Okay? I-I am not gonna be that guy!
Chandler: I don't know. Maybe he hooked up with that hot girl he was talking to.
Emily: Well, that me. (They kiss again.) Here, have this. (She gives him the candy bar.) Im only allowed one piece of carryon anyway. (She starts towards the jetway.)
ROSS: Look, that has nothing to do with this, ok? She's my ex-wife. If she were marrying a guy, none of you'd expect me to be there.
Mr. Douglas: Thats unbelievable.
Chandler: Oh, tell her good luck with that.
Monica: No-no-no that was good, it was, that was uh, that was a goood kiss
Joey: Thats crazy.
Ross: See, there are still several areas that haven't been fully excavated.
Joey: Yeah, lady, I do! I got a problem with that!
Joey: Oh really? Thatd be great! You guys can be the contestants!
Ross: Oh, yeah, that would be me, um, I have, I have a problem I-I tip way too much, way, way, too much, its a sickness really.
Ross: Oh my God! Those werent albino kids, that was computer camp! Rach! (He hurries inside and Chandler is taking out the garbage.)
Monica: Rachel used to live in that room.
(They get into a wrestling match, that ends with Ross making Rachel paint her forehead with the nail polish. They both end up lying next to each other, stop, and look at each other for a moment.)
Chandler: Wow thats actually pretty cool.
Ross: That, for all I knew would, could last forever. That to me is a break-up.
Chandler: (Points to one) Thats one?
Joey: Hey. Hey look I am still Joey, okay. Flowers theyre just, you know, theyre nice to look at. And that happens to be a picture by a famous artist. Of a famous baby.
Emily: Really?! Well, thats just lovely, isnt it? I mustve missed your call, even though I didnt leave the flat all day.
ROSS: Wha, OK, now how do you know that?
Joanna: Because if you feel uncomfortable with your friend dating someone you work for, there are always ways to fix...that.
Ross: That, that is funny... (to Joey).... and Rachel keeps touching him.
Phoebe: Ooh that is definitely Chandler, Joey, or Ross. (Thinks) Or-or Rachel!
Monica: Thats it. Im done. I dont care when the baby comes, no more betting.
Joey: I think I know that girl.
Phoebe: (to Vince) Well, that couldve been really awkward.
Joey: They have a kid together, y'know. Theyre like, theyre like a family, and if, I dont know, theres chance they could make that work, I know I wouldnt want to be the guy who stood in the way of that. Are you okay? Do you wanna ah, come poke a nude guy?
Ross: That that's ridiculous! I don't feel guilty for her failures!
Rachel: Why? Is he? He is! Isnt he? Hes dating that slut in marketing!
Phoebe: (singing) Love is sweet as summer showers, love is a wondrous work of art, but your love oh your love, your love...is like a giant pigeon...crapping on my heart. La-la-la-la-la- (some guy gives her some change and to that guy) Thank you. (sings) La-la-la-la...ohhh!
Amy: Not that great. It's almost if people don't want to hear that their babies are ugly.
Rachel: I dont care about the little dude! I cant! I cannot listen to anymore of this! Yknow, the only person who would want to listen to this is a mental health professional! And then its only because they get paid $100 an hour! Do you know how much money I couldve made listening to you? $2,000! And do you know when I figured that out? While you were talking!