words in movies
Chandler: Look, shes really nice. Okay? And she mentioned that she adored the way that you arranged the sponges.
Monica: Did she really say that?
Phoebe: (looking around) Whos cell phone is that? Its just so annoying; everywhere you go.
Phoebe: No! Wait! I was just saying that so youd think I was a good person. Fight for me.
Ross: Thats not really porn.
Ross: Hey, yknow what and if youre looking for a place? I just heard in the elevator this morning that a woman in my building died.
Ross: Well I dont know, but how-how great would that be huh? You living in my building. I could help take care of the baby. I can come over whenever I want. (Rachel looks at him.) With your permission.
Rachel: Yeah that would really be great.
Monica: I will prove it to you! Okay? About a week ago I was wearing those jeans and I dropped a pen in my lap and it left an ink stain on the crotch. Now when she comes back I will find it and show you that stain!
Chandler: Honey, isnt it possible that the company that sold the jeans made more than just the one pair?
Phoebe: Oh, yeah try that. (He finishes and looks at her.) So, is that better?
Ross: Thanks for the coffee, or bedankt voor de koffie, Gunter. (He translates that phrase into Dutch.)
Joey: (entering) Hey Ross! Listen, do you want to go see that new Imax movie on tide pools?
Monica: Oh, will you do the top of the cabinets? Thatll really work up your appetite for lunch.
(Brenda pulls a chair to the counter and uses it to get up on the counter in order to clean the top of the cabinets. Monica sneaks over, bends over, and tries to see the stain. That doesnt work so she sticks her head between Brendas legs. Suddenly Brenda changes her stance and traps Monicas head between her legs.)
Joey: No room? Its a baby. Its like this big. (Holds his hands about a foot apart.) Yknow, I mean you-you could you could put it over here. (A desk.) Or-or-or we could put it right here. (The chair.) Aw, its cute, right? Or-or we could put it over here. (By the bathroom door.) You wouldnt even notice it. Wheres the baby? (Mumbles that its over in the corner.)
Rachel: Honey, its so sweet that you want me to stay, but I-I cant do that to you. I mean it would disrupt your entire life.
Phoebe: No, I got in trouble for that before. Ill see you later.
Phoebe: Really? Thats the thing Im worse at! Youll see. (Exits.)
Chandler: And yet you dont recognize that youre crazy.
Chandler: You see that?
Mrs. Verhoeven's Daughter: Thats so sweet. (Takes the flowers.) Would you like to come in and say good-bye? Im sure it would mean a lot to her.
Ross: Oh I dont know that it would.
Eric: Well if I didnt have sex with you, I had sex with someone that looked an awful lot like
Brenda: Look, I know it must be hard that your wife is a lesbian, but its wrong. Youre married.
Rachel: You mean the one that youre wearing? (Adjusts Monicas pink bra strap as Monica looks down her shirt.)
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel enters and notices that Joey has set up a space for the baby where the couch was, complete with a crib.]
Joey: Hey! Uh, this is just to give you an idea. Okay well, we can put screens here, (In front of the crib.) so that the baby has privacy, and-and-and maybe a mobile over the crib. And uhOh look! Heres a baby monitor (Holds it up), which until the baby comes we can use as walkie-talkies. Huh?
Joey: Ahhhhhhhhhhhh . That-that-thats really just to show where the baby would go. Yknow why dont I hold on to him so that theres no confusion? (Takes him back, sets him on the chair, and apologizes to him.)
Joey: Look, if Im bringing home a woman who cant stand being around a baby, then maybe I dont want to be with that woman! Or maybe well just do it in the bathroom of the club!
Joey: Isnt that great?
Ross: Thats right!
Joey: Yeah, I gotta go! I got an acting job. (Turns towards the door, pauses, and turns back.) Like youd believe that. This sucks!
Chandler: Thats a hernia.
Ross: Yes, she is this new professor of my department that I did not kiss.
Phoebe: Okay, you guys. You guys I think I know whats going on here. Okay, you guys STOP!! (They stop.) I know that, I know that youre acting mad because you think that itll make it easier to leave. But deep down youre still really sad. Deep-deep down.
Phoebe: And then you say that it's almost midnight and you have to go because you don't wanna start the new year with me if you can't finish it. (They kiss) I'm gonna miss you. You scientist guy.
Rachel: Yeah that seems fair. We never use them.
MONICA: Oh, yay. Ok about that two.
Phoebe: All right, I already didn't give them back to you, that's what I said. (Walks away over to Rachel.) Where is that other earring?
Phoebe: Oh, howd that happen?
Chandler: Now, is that never talking about it again?!
MONICA: Oh yeah, well there's the possibility that I won't make rent.
Rachel: Oh er... well you know Emma started crawling? I realised that this place, is very unsafe for a baby. So I went to the store and got some stuff to baby-proof the apartment.
Monica: It doesnt say that!
Ross: Oh, no! No-no! No, I tired! But I couldnt. Thats why Im here. Maybe we could attack them together? (He glares at him.) That-thats a no.
Joey: Nope, not that one.
Joey: Oh comelook, when I was a kid my dads company gave season tickets to the number one salesman every year, all right? My dad never won! Of course, he wasnt in the sales division, but still, I never ever, ever forgot that!
CHANDLER: I'm hoping that when Bob doesn't show up, she will seek comfort in the open arms of the wry stranger at the next table.
Chandler: Y'know that is a popular opinion today I must say.
ROSS: That was 14 hours ago.
Rachel: Are ah, having dinner with my Dad tomorrow night, I hope thats okay.
Rachel: Well, cant you tell her that you are not in the mood?
Monica: I was just saying that because I was ovulating and you said you wouldn�t have sex with me while we�re fighting.
PHOEBE: That you don't stop talking about it.
Rachel: Sure! That sounds great! Just leave me a message and tell me where to meet you. Okay? (Walks away.)
Chandler: (laughs) Well, don�t believe everything you hear, Ken. (both turning away to files) But yeah, that�s true. Alright, let�s get started, by take a look at last quarter�s figures. (The female next to Chandler starts smoking, towards her:) Ah, Claudia, aren�t you supposed to blow smoke up the bosses� ass?
[Cut to Rosss apartment, he his playing the Bagpipes, badly. Hes worse than that whole keyboard thing a few years ago.]
Ursula: Okay, I know that I went to that all ready.
Chandler: All right everybody! Just be quiet! Be quiet! Be quiet!! Pipe-pipe-pipe down! (They settle down) What is the matter with you people?! This woman was trying to do a nice thing for you. She was making candy so she could try to get to know all of you, and Ill bet that not one of you can tell me her name! Am I right?
(Cut to Joey's apartment. Joey looks inside the cardboard box that used to be the home of Chick Jr. and Duck Jr., but they have disappeared.)
Joey: One! (Pause.) No ten! You said ten! You cant take that back!
RACHEL: That is the most ridiculous.
Monica: Chandler, what are you doing? That thing can put someones eye out!
Ross: Oh, I love that guy! (Laughs.)
Monica: Oh, we're not doing that. Okay
Phoebe: That sucks! That's not a trip! I just came from the park! What are we gonna high five about at the stupid Central Park? "Well, it's right by my house, all right!"
Carol: (screaming at Ross) Oh, what do you know? No one's going up to you and saying, "Hi, is that your nostril? Mind if we push this pot roast through it?"
Joey: Really? Thats great! You and my sister, sittin in a tree.
Dr. Long: Thats fine, for now well just call her Baby Girl Green.
Chandler: I'll admit to the cigarettes and the magazine, but that tape is not mine.
Chandler: That is true.
Rachel: Ohhh, I-I would enjoy that!
Phoebe: Were just celebrating that Joey got his health insurance back.
Mr. Geller: Which means you had seven years of beach fun and you cant put a price on that sweetie.
Rachel: That is not true. She did! She forced me!
Rachel: Oh, name one stupid thing that is as stupid as this one!
Ross: Whats all this about you guys fighting?! Is this really over a room?! I mean, that is so silly!
Chandler: Oh-aw my God! Now, I understand if you never want to sleep with me again, but that would be wrong. We're too good! We owe it, to sex!
Ross: (to Caitlin) Hey uh, y'know that smell gas has?
Ross: oh boy you got mad at that part. I went over there to tell him how great you are but you know me BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, and I ended up telling him that.
Chandler: Y'know what, I know what will cheer you guys up! (he starts spreading envelopes among them) I had a little talk with the boys in New York, told 'em about all the hard work you've been doing and that a little Christmas bonus may be in order.
Marc: Julies cervix is dilated a seven centimeters, thats about four fingers. The doctor let me feel it myself.
Erica: Oh, it was okay. I went to a movie with my cousin and then out for dinner. We went to this place that had... Ooh... (she looks likes she is in pain, holding her belly) Hoo... ooh... Anyway, they had these really amazing cheeseburgers.
Ross: I was hugging her as a friend. Its not my fault her-her hair got in my face, shes got a lot of it and it smells all-all uh coconutty. (Phoebe raises her eyebrows.) What?! Oh, that doesnt mean I have feelings for Rachel! Maybe it means I have feelings for coconuts!
Monica: Did he give you that whole "You're-not-up-to-this" thing again?
Chandler: Eh, forget about the future and stuff! So we only have two kids, yknow? Well pick our favorite and that one will get to go to college.
Chandler: But then later that night
Joey: Six months? Whoa thats rough.
[The next one is from Episode 417: The One With The Free Porn, Chandler and Joey are lamenting the fact that every beautiful woman they see doesnt want to have sex right then and there like in porn.]
Phoebe: Well, what youre wearing is fine for that.
Phoebe: Thats right.
Rachel: I can see that. You look like you slept with a hanger in your mouth.
Joey: Yeah. Yeah, so what? (On phone) Look, I live across the street, (walking to the window) and I know all about you and your little telescope, and I don't appreciate it, okay? (Listens) Yeah, I can see you right now! (Listens) Hello! (Listens) If I wanna walk around my apartment in my underwear, I shouldn't have to feel like(Listens)Thank you, but... that's not really the point... (Listens) The point is that... (Listens) Mostly free weights, but occasionally..
Russell: Oh, thats better then.
Kate: That info-mercial! For the milk carton spout thing! Youre-youre-youre the guy that doesnt know how to pour milk!!
Rachel: You guys! It was bananas, cream, and beef! I-I just cannot believe that you ate that so that I wouldnt feel bad!
Mike: Phoebe writes lots of great songs. Wha... What was that one you sang the other night that everybody just loved?
Frank: I know! Why dont you get drunk! That worked for a lot of girls in my high school.
Chandler: Yeah, well I dont think you can make that statement, unless youve been kicked in an area that God only meant to be treated nicely.
Rachel: How is that the silver lining?
Phoebe: (after a short pause) I didn't even think about that! (pause) Aaargh, sexual politics!!
Monica: (looking at Phoebe eating something) Pheebs, spit that out, that has pork in it.
Joey: All right! Now you go get that beautiful pig! (Ross hesitates, looks unsure) Oink!
(As Bonnie goes to do just that, Rachel smiles to herself, proud of what shes done.)
CHANDLER: Sweet mother of all that is good and pure.
(At that Phoebes eyes open in shock.)
Rachel: Well, she-she ob-obviously saw the tire tracks that were leading up to the closed garage.
Melissa: So last I heard you were gonna get married. (Grabs Rachels hand and notices that she doesnt have a ring on it.) (Sadly) Oh poor Ray-ray.
Monica: That youre not funny or sexy?
Phoebe: Well, I think that shirt makes you look like you should work at a Baskin Robbins... Anyway... Hey, isn't Joey's agent Estelle Leonard?
Chandler: Okay, good luck with that. (Exits.)
Chandler: I didnt mean that. I just meant that the apartment is worth so much more.
Chandler: Thats laughter.
Rachel: Well, Phoebe thats fine because Im not moving.
Rachel: Yeah, I do. I-I do, do that.
Monica: Yeah, two hours, a lifetime thats the same.
Rick: Suddenly, I very aware that Im naked.
Phoebe: I dont believe you! That is brilliant! And Monica has no idea?
Ross: And now you want that money back.
CHANDLER: It's Joey.� (He answers it, holding it out so that Monica can hear too.)� Hey Joe.
Phoebe: Well, that would be great but then what do we do about Denise?
Monica: Never done that before.
Phoebe: Please...wait, how did you do that?
Don: No. But God, a house made of cheese, wouldnt that be incredible?!
Chandler: But we dont do that.
Ross: Thats all youre basing this on?
Ross: Thats correct! This is an audio question, what do you do when the baby makes this sound? (Makes a sound like someone is choking a cat.)
Monica: He cannot play at our wedding! I mean everyone will leave! I mean come on, that is just noise! Its not even a song!
Monica: (To Chandler) You are going to make a joke about my special present! Why would you do that?!
Phoebe: Why? Why would you do that?