words in movies
Phoebe: Doing it on this table. (points at the table)
Rachel: Well, last night you seemed to know your way around the table.
(Ross goes over to the counter. Chandler follows him.)
[Scene: Central Perk, continued from earlier, Chandler is sitting on the table.]
Chandler: Well, you know Phoebs. I don't know if it's your kinda thing, because it involves a lot of being normal. For a large portion of the day.
Joey: What the hell does a paleontologist need a beeper for?
Chandler: A cool phone number, and a possible name for the kid.
[Scene: Chandler's office, he and Phoebe are there when the phone starts ringing.]
Chandler: See that'll stop when you pick up the phone.
Phoebe: Oh. Uh, I'm on. (picks up the phone)
Phoebe: Will he know what this is in reference to? (Listens) And he has your number? (Listens) All right, I'll see that he gets the message. Bye bye.
Phoebe: Most likely. (raises and goes toward the door) Okay, I'm gonna be out there.
(The intercom buzzes)
Chandler: Ooh. (leans against the desk)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are there. Monica is just finishing cleaning the windows.]
Monica: Windows are clean, candels are lit. Uh, belt's to tight, gotta change the belt. Did I turn the fish? (goes over to the kitchen to check on the dinner) No, cause I made lasagne. (to Rachel) Am I out of control?
Rachel: Just a touch. Mon, I don't understand. I mean, you've been dating this guy since like, what... his midterms? I mean, why all the sudden are you so... Oh.
Rachel: Could tonight be the Night?
Joey: Hey, hey. How was the first day?
Chandler: See, it pays to know the man who wears my shoes. (Joey and Ross wonder what he means) Me.
Ross: 'The hills were alive with the sound of music.'
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Young Ethan are sitting in the couch.]
Young Ethan: Well, think about it. It's always on the news. 'A man is being held up, at gunpoint.' 'Tourists are being terrorised, at gunpoint.' And I just kept thinking: why does people continue to go there? (He checks his watch.) Oh, ah. I should go.
Young Ethan: Well, if that's what you kids are calling it these days then, yes I am. I uh, I've kinda been waiting for the right person.
[Time lapse. They are now in Monica's bedroom, on the bed.]
Young Ethan: You know, you read about it, you see it in the movies. Even when you practice it at home, man oh man, it is nothing like that.
Monica: But I figured, you know, that shouldn't change anything. I mean, what the hell does it matter how old we are.
Monica: What we did was wrong. Oh god, I just had sex with somebody that wasn't alive during the Bicentennial.
Chandler: Oh, come on. You told me about the last dream.
Rachel: All right, fine. Um, you were not the only one there. (Camera fades to Ross, who's listening very carefully) Joey was there too.
Rachel: No, it was just the three of us.
(Monica enters, wearing a walkman, so she doesn't hear what the others say)
Chandler: And this has nothing to do with the fact that he needs a note to get out of gym.
Joey: Listen, the next time you talk to him, can you ask him which one the strongest Power Ranger is?
(They all cross they're arms like the Power Rangers do)
Phoebe: No, I know. That's a part of the whole, you know, them-not-liking-you-extravaganza.
Phoebe: Oh, but, could we not go together? I,I don't wanna be the geek that invited the boss.
Chandler: I Think last night was great. You know, the Karaoke thing. Tracy and I doing Ebony and Ivory.
Phoebe: Well, you know what Chandler? I think you've gotta face it. You're like, the guy in the big office, you know. You're the one that hires them, that fires them... They still say you're a great boss.
Rachel: (understands that Monica and Ethan wanna be alone) Hey, did you guys check out those new hand-dryers in the bathroom?
(Rachel, Ross and Ross go to the bathroom)
Young Ethan: All right, look. I've gotta tell you something. I'm not 17. I only said so that you'd think I was cute and vunerable. I'm actually 30, I have a wife, I have a job, I'm your Congressman. Monica, this is ridiculous, we're great together. We can talk, we make each other laugh, and the sex. Oh, man, okay i have no frame of graft, but I thought that was great.
Young Ethan: Then, what's the problem?
(Ross, Rachel and Joey come back from the bathroom. They discover that Monica and Ethan aren't finished talking to each other yet.)
(They go to the bathroom again)
[Scene: A hall on the floor where Chandler works. Chandler and Phoebe enters, and overhears some employees's conversation. One of them is doing Chandler.]
Chandler: Thanks. Listen, about the weekly numbers, I'm gonna need them on my desk by nine o'clock.
Chandler: You have to give 'em something, you know. Okay, now that was Gerston, Santos, and who's the guy with the moustache?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is watching TV, but turns it off, and Rachel is sleeping on the couch. Ross puts a blanket over her.]
Rachel: (talking in her sleep) Oooooooooh. (Rachel strokes her hand over the pillow. Ross mimicks her silently) Oh, that's nice. Oh, oh. Huh, Ross!
(Ross gets all excited and starts to dance on the coffee table, but slips allmost immediatly, and falls onto the couch. Rachel wakes up.)
Ross: I'm having... I'm having a baby. (jumps back onto the table again) I'm having a... Where's the phone? The phone?
Rachel: I don't know where the phone is.
(Ross runs from the table, over the couch but slips and falls onto the floor)
[Scene: The Hallway, Ross is eagerly waiting for the others to get ready, to go to the hospital.]
Ross: Yeah, save it for the cab, okay.
Ross: Joey, get out of the fridge.
Ross: What is that? (refering to the sandwich)
Joey: For the ride.
(They all go down the stairs, but Ross turns around, looking like his in a coma. The others also turns around to get him.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is giving the bill to the same beautiful woman from before.]
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Santa (Chandler), Superman (Joey), Ben, and Monica are listening to the Holiday Armadillo (Ross) finish telling the story of Hanukkah.]
Joey: All right look, let me show you the catalog! (Does so.) See? Huh? It's the latest thing! Everyone's got one! Men! Women! Children! Everyone's carrying them!
[Scene: Monicas bedroom, Chandler is playing with the bed.]
Tag: I'm okay. I gotta go down to the police station and look at mug shots.
CHAN: Y'know, maybe this isn't such a big deal. Y'know, I mean, the way that I see it is you get a great job and you get to have sex. Y'know, I mean, throw in a tree and a fat guy and you've got Christmas.
Chandler: Come on. An 80-foot inflatable dog let loose over the city. How often does that happen?
The Girls: No, not getting my bra!
Chandler: With the balled-up socks? I figured you taught him that.
[Chandler proceeds to point out Joeys errors in this forth set of flashbacks. The first flashback is from The One With The Cat. Chandler has just returned home to see that their apartment has been cleaned out and finds Joey trapped in the entertainment center.]
The Man: (To Ross) Excuse me. (He puts up a flyer that has a sketch drawing of Joey and it reads, "Warning! Intruder! If you see this creep - call the cops!") You should check this out, tell the other tenants. Apparently he's running around looking for some kind of a hot girl.
Monica: Chandler, if you thought I was going to get you porn for Valentines Day (pulls a video out of a basket) you were right! Apparently, its about a young girl who moves to the big city, you know, in search of stardom, but ends up having sex with a lot of guys! Yeah, it got four starts! (looks closer) Oh, wait a minute. Those arent stars. Anyway, you want to take a look?
[Scene: Living room. Joey and Sandy are talking with the Snufflebumps.]
Joey: If you wanna get back in the car, we need the wire, your call.
ROSS: Oh, oh, you're... uh... you're, oh you're the date.
Monica: To score the winning touchdown, by the way.
Phoebe: Okay, Monicas are the biggest.
Rachel: Well, for starters I would've said the right name at my wedding!
Gary: Phoebe, it's okay that you feel this way. I mean it is soon. And there's a lot of things we don't know about each other, and I just figure that everything I really like. And the things I don't know, I get to learn about at someplace with both our names on the mailbox.
[Scene: The Charity Event, Rachel, Phoebe, and Joey are sitting at their table.]
CHANDLER: Ya know Phoebs, don't feel so bad for 'em. After they're done playing, I break out the little plastic women and everybody has a pretty good time.
Ross: Gunther! Gunther. Gunther, please tell me you didnt say anything to Rachel about me and the girl from the Xerox place.
(Ross recognises her and goes over to the couch, mouthing Oh my God
Joey: Thanks for stopping by. See ya! (Throws them out and closes the door.) (To Cecilia) I-I am so sorry. I
Monica: Nooo! No, thats not true. No, best time ever! Yeah, you rocked me world! (She turns out the light to go back to sleep.)
CAROL: Actually, he is getting closer on the talking thing. He can't quite say mama yet, but once he said yumen.
Joey: (opening the door) And there you go!
[Scene: The Movie Set, Joey and Richard are in the middle of a scene. They are both holding swords.]
Ross: Yeah, uh, except for the red sock, which is still red. I'm sorry, please don't be upset, it could happen to anyone.
Rachel: Yeah, and also we need more umm, drinks. Hold on a second. (Gets up but stumbles a little bit.) Whup, okay. (She makes it to the phone and picks it up, without dialing.) Hello! Vegas? Yeah, we would like some more alcohol, and y'know what else? We would like some more beers. Hello? Ohh, I forgot to dial!
MONICA: What's to know? Buy sell, high low, bears bulls...[on the phone] Yes Manhattan...yeah telephone number of the stock...selling store.
[Scene: The lecture, Rachel is listening closely, Ross is bored out of his mind.]
(Rachel goes back and sits down. The rest don't know what to say.)
The Director: Tasty! Im really starting to feel like you guys have a history, its-its nice.
Ross: Yeah, but Im your brother. Were family. Thats the most important thing in the world.
Ross: Look, I'm sorry to hear about your tragedy, ok? But the swings are perfectly safe, and besides Emma loves them. You know what, you should come with us and you'll see!
[Scene: Monicas birthday, its just after the surprise.]
Joey: I thought I did! Oh hey guess what? The premiere is next week and youre all invited! (They all gasp.)
(cut to Joey on the other side, who finally leaves the door and goes to his apartment)
Don: so Ive been slowly phasing out the wine importing and focusing more on the cheese side of things.
Phoebe: Oh my God!! (She runs after him, but sets of the security system, which locks the stores door and brings down a set of bars behind her, caging her in.) No! What?! Help me! Let me out! Now! (Points the musket at them.)
Phoebe: (notices his bag.) Hey, y'know what? My Grandma had the exact same bag!
Mr. Geller: (looking at the picture) Why dont I remember this dog?
Chandler: I'd love to, but it's 2300 hours and I'm about to have the most organized sex anyone's ever had.
Mr. Geller: Yknow how the garage floods every Spring?
Joey: This is so unfair! The one thing I wanted to do was throw my best friend a bachelor party, but no, I wasnt allowed to. All I got was a stupid steak dinner!
Mrs. Geller: We know how expensive weddings can be, besides this may be the only wedding we get to throw (patting Monica on the shoulder.).
(She takes the pencil out of Monica's coffee and Monica puts her cup down in disgust.)
Phoebe: So, what happens to the old guys?
Joey: Hold on. Hold on. (Picking up a note pad and writing and reading the message aloud.) Rachel coming. Do...Something.
Joey: All right. Let's get the contestants out of their isolation booths. (He removes the waste bucket that's over the duck and the laundry basket that's over the chicken.) And they're off! (He puts his foot in front of the chick, stopping it from moving.)
[Scene: Ross and Rachels apartment, Rachel is unpacking as the phone rings.]
ROSS: Yeah. Hey, remember the time I jammed that pencil into your hand?
Monica: Forty-two to twenty-one! Like the turkey, Ross is done!
(Rachel takes the ball from his hands and bounces it off of Rosss forehead and Chandler catches the rebound.)
Monica: Ok..You know the old classics you know,You look nice? They're still ok.
Ross: Oh-oh, youre-youre fellow scholars. What exactly were you looking for, hmm? Perhaps, (Grabs a book from the shelf behind him) perhaps Dr. Chester Stocks musings on the Smiledon Californicus?
Emily: (Giggles.) Ohh...(She realizes that shes in her gown.) Oh! You were not meant to see me before the wedding. Its bad luck.
Monica: Dead leg!! (kicks him in the thigh.)
Phoebe: So uh, now look at the picture
Phoebe: Oh, you guys! We've got to keep all the tickets together (takes the bowl from Ross and puts it on the table)
Ross: It was 5:30 in the morning, and you had rambled on for 18 pages. Front and back!! (they go into the living room, trapping Monica, Chandler, and Joey in the kitchen) (to Rachel) Oh-oh-oh, and by the way, Y-O-U-apostrophe-R-E means you are, Y-O-U-R means your!
Chandler: (to Rachel, whos entering) Hey! Howd the interview go?
(phone starts ringing and Chandler comes running out of the bathroom)
Chandler: Let me get this straight. I called yesterday trying to cancel my reservation and I was told it was not refundable, then we drove six hours all the way up here and now you tell me that we don't have a reservation?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler and Joey are playing with the duck and the chick.]
[The stereo system booms out 'Billions of years ago. . .'. Ross gets up and changes it to music.]
Joey: Wha-a how about this: Another table leaves, right? But there�s still some food left on their place, okay, what�s the restaurant�s policy about people eatin� that?
Ross: Gimme the this!
Rachel: I just saw Danny getting on the subway with a girl and he had his arm around her.
(Rachel sits on the window seat, and knocks against it)
Rachel: (angrily) No! All right?! I did not see the bird! I did not see the fish! I did not see the piece of Styrofoam that was shaped like Mike Tyson! I did not, because I was trying to teach you how to sail a boat! Which obviously is an impossible thing to do!
Chandler: Okay. Uh, well dim the lights, dim the lights. (He goes to the light switch and finds its not a dimmer switch when he flips the lights off.) Or turn them out all together. Uh, no scented candles. Okay here. Here we go. (He sprays an aerosol air freshener above her.)
Chandler: Okay, thats like the least fun game ever.
The Bass Barber: Omm-pah, omm-pah, omm-pah.
Monica: (to Chandler and Joey) I won the game.
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, Chandler and Joey are living here and Ross is writing on the Magna-Doodle when Rachel opens the door causing the door knob to hit his hand.]
[Cut to The Philly.]
[Scene: Central Perk. Rachel is talking to a man at the counter. Ross and Phoebe are sitting at the couches.]
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Monica, Phoebe, Joey and Chandler are waiting for Ross and Rachel to come home and Monica is looking at the sign Phoebe bought that says, "Its a Boy!"]
Phoebe: (angrily) Thats like the tenth time Ive peed since Ive been here!
Receptionist: Welcome to the Chestnut Inn Mr. Bing, so where are you joining from?
Mike: Great! Come on in! (Mike kisses her on the cheek. A butler walks in and takes Phoebe's coat.)
Alice: None. But if there was something you wanted to tell us, were just gonna be right over there (points to the counter) having coffee.
Mike's mom: No... It's lovely. The lights and the snow. I could look at them forever.
Emily: Ross, are you there? Ross, I dont know if you can hear this but (Ross has moved to the window, apparently so that he can hear better.) Im gonna talk anyway, uh, Im in the States with you sister and your friends and its all over with Colin. I came here to tell you that, and to tell youYes, Joey you can have all the chocolate you want, just take it! Uh, I came here to tell you that I love you.
Chandler: Youre arranging flowers! (Pointing to the dish on the table.) You got dead flowers! You got a picture, a picture, of a baby dressed like flowers! This is not Joey!!
Alice: Uhh, we were just in the neighbourhood, so
Teacher: Well that's all right, you can come up to the front and dance with me.
Chandler: I will give you a hundred dollars to whistle right now. (She tries to whistle and blows little chunks of cheesecake out of her mouth.) How can you eat the cheesecake without me?!
Rachel: Oh my god. Ok you guys, theres Danny. Watch. Just watch this. (He walks past the couch to the counter.) See?! Still pretending hes not interested. Ohh, hes coming over. Just pretend like we dont know him. Weve forgotten who he is.
Rachel: So Joey I just hooked Ross and Chandler up with some tuxedos for the wedding, do you need one?
[Scene: The rest stop, Phoebes pulling in.]
Chandler: Oh, no, no, no, don't go! I've scared ya'! I've said too much! I'm hopeless, and awkward, and desperate for love!! (Janice leaves, Chandler then calls Janice to leave a message on her machine) Hey, Janice! It's me. Um, yeah, I-I-I just wanna apologize in advance for having chased you down the street. (runs out the door)
(Chandler throws the ball to kick-off.)
Monica: Hows the big anniversary dinner?
Joey: Oh really? Well, maybe you and I go out for drinks? (Pause) Youre the other one right? (She thinks about it for a second and nods yes.)
Ross: We are four short of a bush-o (pause). God I feel so alive, I love being in the country!
Janice: The receipt.
(The clerk enters the video into the computer.)