words in movies
Ross: Hey! So what's the big news you had us rush all the way over here for?
Chandler: There is nothing like the support of your loving wife, huh?
Joey: Wait a minute, you can't go to Tulsa. Maybe you forgot, but we've got tickets to the Jets game next week.
Joey: We were gonna go see the Jets!
Ross: You can't go, I mean you're the glue that holds this group together!
Rachel: I'm on the phone! (On the phone) Dr. Wiener? (Ross and Rachel walk away)
Monica: You got out of the whole Tulsa thing?
Chandler. Well my boss and I worked out a deal where I only have to be in Tulsa four days a week, so the other three I can be here with you.
Monica: Yeah, you're my husband. I'm not gonna live in a different state than you for 208 days out of the year.
Rachel: (On the phone) Excuse me? Oh yeah? Well, up yours too! (Hangs up)
Ross: (Enters from his bedroom)Who the hell was that?!
Ross: Rach, you can't call people at three in the morning.
Rachel: (Grabs the phone and stars dialing) (On phone) (In a high pitch voice) Wiener, Wiener (In a low pitch voice) Wiener, Wiener!!!
Ross: (Comes back into the living room) Rachel!!!
Joey: (Realizes that he has forgotten all about the double date) Oh my God!
Phoebe: Ooh, great! Just the reaction I was hoping for.
Phoebe: All right, we'll se you and Mike at the restaurant in a couple hours.
Rachel: It's impossible to find a good doctor. I mean, how do you know the good ones from the ones who are gonna push their penis against your knee?
Monica: He didn't die. I saw his daughter last week. Said he was fine. Her on the other hand, botched Botox.
Joey: What? That's the kinda thing you usually run by me.
Phoebe: Wow, that's great! I liked that better than the law thing, so...
(Monica Enters. Chandler is in the kitchen with his laptop)
Joey: Please, we're trying to have a conversation. (Pushes the wine glass closer to Mary Ellen.)
Joey: (Laughs) Of course we do! Mike is playing a game that we used to play in high school. Yeah, where we pretend we don't know each other. We played all kinds of games. (To Mike) Hey, remember the one where I punch you in the face for not being cool?!
Phoebe: (To Joey) You are unbelievable! I spent so much time finding the perfect girl for you, you know. Mary Ellen is really smart and cute and loose.
Phoebe: Who are you kidding? (To Joey) You just find some guy off the street for me? Oh God! This is humiliating!
Chandler: I think you should take the job.
Monica: That's the nicest anyone has ever said to me!
Monica: How was the pediatrician?
Ross: It didn't spend much time on the wall!!!
Phoebe: That wouldn't stand in the way of a true pianist.
(Phoebe and Mike look at him, and he goes over to the counter.)
Ross: Excuse me, I don't mean to be a jerk, but the baby with the rash came in after me.
Receptionist: The doctor will be right with you sir.
Ross: With the circus? He's behind the elephant.
Woman: Wow, so your child is a big fan of the Waldo books too?
Ross: Yeah, that's how I know. I'm Ross by the way.
Ross: Well, let's say, I don't know, you met someone in the pediatrician's office.
Ross: Hmm, yeah. (To a random boy in the waiting room) Come on Ross jr. It's time to go in.
Rachel: Okay, wow, wow, wow. Watch the tongue people, we've got a baby over here.
Chandler: (Tries to hug Joey but J. moves away) What's the matter Joe?
Joey: Dude, you see right thru me!! (They hug) (Joey heads for the door and pushes Chandler's suitcase on the way out.)
Phoebe: Okay, bye-bye! (Pushes Chandler out the door.) Good trip! (Slams the door)
Monica: (Runs out to the hallway) Chandler, wait. It goes: Old job, (Raises her hand) new job, (Raises her hand really high) you. This is just something I have to do.
(Joey opens the door and takes Chandler's suitcase into his own apartment.)
Chandler: (On cell phone) Don't worry, I'll be back before you know it. Yes it will be the same. Because I know, that's how. I promise.
Joey: (On the phone with Chandler) Double promise? Call me when you land.
Joey: Okay, bye. (He hangs up the phone.)
Rachel: Oh wait, I have the ten of spades! Here! (gives it to Phoebe)
Rachel: Come on Joey, I just bought you a new chair! The most expensive one in the store! Hey, yknow what I was thinking? We could name her Francette.
Chandler: Because the kids need new shoes.
Phoebe: No. (Monica brushes Coma Guy's hair in the other direction) No! No! ...So, um, do you think he's doing any better than he was this morning?
Joey: Because of... the reason.
Phoebe: (A woman with large breasts walks in the door) Ohh knockers will help us figure it out. (She walks by and he checks her out.)
[Joey and Ross go back out into the main area.]
[Chandler makes a noise of absolute disgust and heads into the living room.]
ROSS: Carol, what's the matter? What happened?
Machine: Message erased. To record a message begin speaking at the tone.
Mrs. Geller: Oh no, dont be silly. I just bet Id need these. (Opens the freezer to reveal )
Phoebe: You wanna be on my list too? Keep talking! Has anyone seem my list by the way?
Gavin: Well, let me explain how birthday parties usually work. There are presents, and a cake, perhaps a fourth or fifth person. Ok, I ... got you the present to make up for being such a jerk to you earlier.
Monica: Why don't you just be straight with her? Tell her the truth.
(They run to the bed, sit down, and start making out again.)
Rachel: (looks around for the camera) Okay. Umm, well, first I would like to start by apologizing for kissing you and uh, for yelling at you.
Rachel: (deadpan) Oh look who it is, my husband. The apple of my eye.
CHANDLER: Jeannie, the head of east coast operations Jeannie?
[Scene: The Semi-Private Labor Room, Ross is returning to find another couple has taken the place of Marc and Julie.]
Ross: Oh great, I live on the street.
[Chandler can't find his money in the pocket. In the meantime, another couple shows up, and Chandler turns away to look for his money]
MRS. GREENE: ...the scotch and the cigarettes...
Ross: Thats funny. Yeah. Yknow youre the funniest man here in a pink bunny costume his wife made him wear.
Dr. Mitchell: Look at this, it's from the cellars of Ernest and Tova Borgnine, so how could we resist?
[Scene: The rest stop, Joey is making a sign.]
Cecilia: That was good, that was really good. But I-I think your hands maybe a little off, they should be maybe right like (She grabs the back of his neck and kisses him passionately causing them to fall onto the couch.)
[Scene: The ride along.]
Monica: Nice work everybody! So much for the yknow, "You can drive it, but dont tell Rachel" plan!
[Scene: Joey's apartment, (The one he had when he was Dr. Drake Remoray, because he still is.) Rachel is there and admiring the big ceramic fake dog.]
CHANDLER: Yeah well, I hear the place looks great.
Aunt Lillian: The doctor says it's a matter of hours.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Ross are in the kitchen, Rachel and Monica are sitting in the living room, and Phoebe is, you guessed it, still on hold.]
Chandler: Well, last time I saw him he was heading out the door with the brides maid and a bucket of strawberries. So uh, youre not still upset about what that guy told ya are ya?
Phoebe: Okay. All right. (Hands her the phone.) Good luck explaining all the calls to China.
Rachel: So honey, what are you gonna do about the little girl?
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's. Ross is sitting in the couch doing Chandler's game. Chandler is sitting in his barca-lounger. The girls are in the kitchen.]
Rachel: (entering) Hey Ross? Umm, I just ran into Caitlin in the hallway and-and uh, you must be getting better at this flirting stuff than I thought.
Chandler: Why dont you go up on stage. Ill get a picture of you doing the speech.
Joey: (on the tape) I'm comin' out! (He opens the door and hops out pointing the gun in all directions and then runs out of view.)
Rachel: Sup.. You want to talk supportive? You didn't even come and visit me when I was in the hospital having the baby.
Phoebe: You saved them! You guys! Oh God, youre the best!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang is returning from Petes.]
Ross: Well, it was the only thing to do there that didn't have a line.
Ross: Ah, well all go. (motions to Chandler) Come on. (the guys leave)
Joey: Remember when you where a kid and your Mom would drop you off at the movies with a jar of jam and a little spoon?
(in the hallway, Eric is moving in)
Phoebe: (gasps) Oh my God! I know who the father is (She walks into Monica and Chandlers.)
MINDY: ...from the syphilis.
[Scene: The ladies' bathroom at the restaurant, Monica and Angela are talking.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's Apartment, everyone's there; Phoebe recites the last verse of a poem to Joey. This poem is known as "The Night Before Christmas" by Clement Clarke Moore, but it seems that it's rather "Account of a visit from St. Nicholas" by Henry Livingston.]
[cut to later in the same scene]
Monica: Very good, (getting up and sliding a One into the dancers hot pants) so good.
{There's another continuity error here. Before Monica says I love you, Chandler's holding the vests so that you couldn't see the collar, you could see all three, and they were folding nicely. After she says the line and the camera cuts back to Chandler, you can only see two out of the three, you can see the collar of the top one, and it looks like it was folded sloppily, unlike before. Hey, you notice things while spending this much time on this!}
Phoebe: Ooh, yknow what, I think its time for puppy to go out again. Come on, lets go to the balcony.
Joey: The what?
Joey: Oh, okay. (to Ross) The what?
Ross: Thanks, Gunther. (takes the plate Gunther serves him and Rachel comes up and kisses him) (to Rachel) Hey! (to Gunther) Umm, can I get a napkin too?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next morning. Chandler is sitting and staring at his phone. Monica enters and creeps up next to Chandler.]
Rachel: Joey look, just look at it this way, the sooner Phoebe breaks Chandler the sooner this is all over and out in the open.
PHOEBE: I'm so sorry honey, but, okay, Rachel gave this guy her number and, um, she doesn't want Ross to answer the phone.� So, you have to intercept all his calls.
Monica: What did the doctor say? Any news on when the baby will come?
RYAN: Sorry, the lightning. Lightning was an unfortunate incidence. You look lovely, lovely.
Chandler: (goes towards Joey) You know that's not the reason Joe. (Joey hugs him and after, he takes something from the fridge and puts it in his mouth. He goes back to where he was standing before)
Chandler: Can somebody else hug him? I have to stay by the window.
Ross: Free cats do that too, y'know. {Which reminds me, if I might get a little political here, support your local animal shelter. Pet shops are not the place to buy dogs and cats from, you get a much better deal from the shelter, plus they probably won't die on you in a week and a half. If you want a leash, go to the pet shop. If you want the dog for that leash, go to the shelter and save it's life. Now back to regularly scheduled programming.}
Joey: Hey, you can't say you're breezy, that, that totally negates the breezy.
Phoebe: Please, right now, no, every time I see him its like Is it on the lose? Is it watching me?
Monica: No, the one who looked at you once because you got in her way.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and the gang is watching Sumo wrestling on TV.]
Phoebe: Oh, it's your audition from this morning. Can I use the phone again?
JOEY: But wait, wait, wait. Then, after I left her office, she caught up with me at the elevator and offered me an even bigger part.
Doctor: Would you like to cut the umbilical cord?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Mr. Tribbiani is on the phone.]
Ross: Marcel is an illegal exotic animal. I'm not allowed to have him in the city. If they find him, they'll take him away from me.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are sitting at the table.]
Joey: Oh yeah, Smokey Joe here got half way to the highway and collapsed.
Chandler: But wait a minute though, how are we gonna get there, though, because my Mom wont let me cross the street.
[Scene: Bill and Colleen's apartment. Chandler comes running into the living room. Monica is the only one there.]
Rachel: This is the worst date ever. How could you set me up with this creep?
Mike: Look, if Phoebe wants to marry David, she should, I'm not gonna stand in the way of that and neither should you.
Parker: Look! Its the bunny hop!
Chandler: I'll get you the Cliff Notes.
Monica: Oh, you got the whole night, huh?
(Ross takes a twenty and slips it underneath the bill when Dr. Green isnt looking.)
Ross: You don't have to do anything. It will just be easier if it is the two of us, like college, remember? You...you break theice with some kind of jokes so that they know you're the funny one and I swoop in with some interesting conversation, sothey'll see that I'm the brilliant, brooding, sexy one...
JOEY: Hey, hey, and I'm in the movie.
Jason: So Phoebe, you ah, sounded kinda serious on the phone, is ah, is anything wrong?
CHANDLER: [reaches for the footrest lever] Do we dare?
CHANDLER: I'm gonna hold him a different way. Look I don't understand, if you hated it so much, why did you buy it in the first place?
The Doctor: Hes doing just fine, hes resting now, but you can see him in a little bit.
Joey: So the ah, plays pretty great, huh?
Phoebe: Yeah we thought it would be nice to use the fancy china for dessert too.
The Director: Hang on a minute! Joey, you keep touching your face. Is something wrong?
Phoebe: A-Allright, well... I'll call the cab company.
[Another group of flashbacks begin with Episode 513: The One With Joeys Bag. Joey is carrying the bag and has entered Central Perk to the amusement of Ross and Chandler.]
Chandler: My Catholic friend is right. She's distraught. You're there for her. You pick up the pieces, and then you usher in the age of Ross! (Ross and Chandler look off into the distance. Joey, wondering what they are looking at, looks in the same direction)
(from 1.01 - "The One Where Monica Gets a New Roommate - The Pilot")
Ross: So its looks like were the first ones here.
JOEY: Get out of the corner. Pass it, pass it.
DELIVERY GUY: Uhh, I don't know, I just bring the scripts.