words in movies
Shelley: Well yeah! ...Oh God. I- just- I thought- Good, Shelley. I'm just gonna go flush myself down the toilet now...(backs out of the room) Okay, goodbye...
Chandler: Huh. Did, uh... any of the rest of you guys think that when you first met me?
[Scene: The Hospital, Mr. and Mrs. Geller are there, along with Aunt Lillian. Ross and Monica enter and everyone says hi and kisses.)
Aunt Lillian: The doctor says it's a matter of hours.
[Cut to the hospital, later. Everyone is talking about Nana.]
Monica: The fuzzy little mints at the bottom of her purse.
(The nurse comes out of Nana's room.)
Monica: G'bye, Nana. (She kisses her on the forehead.)
(He goes to kiss her but she moves. Monica screams. Ross shouts and stares in disbelief. Monica runs out of the room.)
Ross: Y'know how-how the nurse said that-that Nana had passed? Well, she's not, quite..
(Monica returns with the nurse and they go into Nana's room.)
(Nana passes for the second time and the nurse pulls the blanket over her. Ross and Monica go to tell the family)
Phoebe: Hm, I mean maybe no-one ever really goes. Ever since my mom died, every now and then, I get the feeling that she's like right here, y'know? (She circles her hand around her right shoulder. Chandler, sitting on her right, draws back nervously) Oh! And Debbie, my best friend from junior high- got struck by lightning on a miniature golf course- I always get this really strong Debbie vibe whenever I use one of those little yellow pencils, y'know? ...I miss her.
Phoebe: Y'know, I dunno who this is, but it's not Debbie. (Hands back the pencil)
(He tries pushing against the chest of drawers. Then he opens one of the drawers and climbs into the closet using that; he falls behind the chest of drawers with a shout.)
Monica: ...And then we throw your body in the water... Gee, that does sound fun.
Chandler: No, nono, don't- don't worry about it. Believe me, apparently other people have made the same mistake.
Chandler: No! Uh, I d'know! The point is, if you were gonna set me up with someone, I'd like to think you'd set me up with someone like him.
[Scene: Nana's Bedroom, Ross is holding a dress out from inside the closet.]
Ross: (holding a dress out from inside the closet) This one?
Ross: I have shown you everything we have. Unless you want your mother to spend eternity in a lemon yellow pant-suit, go with the burgundy.
Aunt Lillian: You know, whatever we pick, she would've told us it's the wrong one.
Mrs. Geller: You're right. We'll go with the burgundy.
Ross: Oh! A fine choice. I'm coming out. (Starts to climb over the furniture)
Ross: (forages around) Okay, I have nothing in an evening shoe in the burgundy. I can show you something in a silver that may work.
Ross: No! Nonono, wait a sec. I may have something in the back.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are preparing to leave for the funeral.]
Monica: Are these the shoes?
[Scene: The cemetary, after the funeral.]
Joey: No, it's the pre-game. I'm gonna watch it at the reception.
Ross: I know, uh, the air, the-the trees... even though Nana's gone there's, there's something almost, uh- I dunno, almost life-aff- (Not looking where he is going he falls into an open grave)
[Scene: The Wake, at the Gellers' house. Ross is lying on his back, with Phoebe squatting over him, checking to see if he's injured.]
Phoebe: Okay, don't worry, I'm just checking to see if the muscle's in spasm...huh.
(Cut to Chandler and a woman, Andrea, reaching for the same slice of meat)
Ross: Not the first two, but the second two- woooo! ...I love you guys. You guys are the greatest. I love my sister (Kisses Monica), I love Pheebs... (Hugs her)
Ross: Rachel. Rachel Rachel. (Sits down beside her) I love you the most.
Rachel: (humouring him) Oh, well you know who I love the most?
(Cut to Joey watching TV in the corner. He makes an extravagant gesture of disappointment.)
Joey: (hides the TV, but he still has an earphone) Just a, uh... hearing disability.
Mr. Geller: What's the score?
Joey: Seventeen-fourteen Giants... three minutes to go in the third.
(Time lapse. A large crowd of men are now watching the game)
Mrs. Geller: No, I'd be hearing about 'Why didn't I get the honey-glazed ham?', I didn't spend enough on flowers, and if I spent more she'd be saying 'Why are you wasting your money? I don't need flowers, I'm dead'.
Mrs. Geller: I'm telling you, it's a wonder your mother turned out to be the positive, life-affirming person that she is.
Monica: Do you think things would have been better if you'd just told her the truth?
(There is a cry of disappointment from the crowd of men.)
[Scene: Central Perk, the gang are looking at old photos.]
Rachel: Aww, look at the little thing.
Monica: Oh, that's Nana, right there in the middle. (Reads the back) 'Me and the gang at Java Joe's'.
Lowell: It's like Mardi Gras without the paper mache heads. How 'bout you?
Lowell: Pretty much, most of the time. We have a kind of... radar.
Lowell: Speaking for my people, I'd have to say no. By the way, your friend Brian from Payroll, he is.
(Monica quickly dives under the water as Joey enters. He looks a little shocked at what Chandler's doing.)
Phoebe: The exclamation point in the title scares me. (Gesturing) Y'know, it's not just Freud, it's Freud!
Chandler: Okay. (They go inside) (To the guy at the desk) I wanna quit the gym.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica, Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe are now sitting in the living room.]
Phoebe: Oh, he's at the doctor, he didn't poop the whole time we were there!
SUSIE: OK, well then who was the kid that got caught masturbating?
Rachel: Wait a minute! She just made a scene in the middle of the ceremony!
Joey: Uh, aren't we kind of in the middle of something here?
Chandler: The guy was hammered, okay? Theres no way, you look like Rosss mother.
PBS Volunteer: Hey, no way, I'm in the shot man.
Chandler: (approaching) Here you go Joe, heres the freshly squeezed orange juice you asked for. (Hands it to him.)
Jill: My God, you're choking! (she runs over and gives him the Heimlich, the gum flies from his mouth) That better?
[Joey's place. He's watching Baywatch, lauging. He goes to say something to Chandler in the other chair but no one's there. He goes to call Chandler but decides not to.]
Monica: (yelling and waving her hand in the air) I know! I know! I know!
The Teacher: Monica, you asked the question.
Ross: (entering, with the rest of the gang) What's going on?
Ross: Hey! There are some men who will do whatever it takes to make their marriage work! Okay? There are some men who will stand by and-and watch as their wives engage in-in what only can be described as a twosome with some-some woman she barely knows from the gym!
Rachel: (closing the door) Ross said theres still no word from Chandler.
Rachel: Well, what is the truth?
JOEY: [dials the phone] It's a woman.
Rachel: I uh, I have two tickets to the Knicks game tonight if youre interested, just as a thank you for this week.
The Assistant Director: (to another actor) Richard? Were ready for you. (Richard approaches.) Joey Tribbiani? This is Richard Crosby hes playing Vincent.
Monica: (grabbing the picture) Give me that!
Monica: You must feel horrible. Hey! The guys have free porn!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's Balcony, Rachel is throwing Paolo's clothes over the side.]
Ross: All right then. (Follows her in and checks the place out.)
JOEY: I'm sorry, it's the pigs. they're reluctant to get in the blankets!
(Dr. Geller, the man with the Ph.D. in Paleontology, is trying to find a place to hide, but this supposedly intelligent man in the hands of clich�d scriptwriters runs around with his pants down around his ankles like one of the Three Stooges.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is returning from a date with Josh, and when they get the door open, Rachel turns and passionately kisses Josh.]
Chandler: No-o-o! (To Monica) No? (She nods no.) No-o-o! Look Joey, heres the thing, Monica and I have decided to live together, here. So, Im gonna be moving out man.
Monica: All right then, go fight for her! Go to London! I mean, that could be you and Emily! (Points to the TV.) That, but-but nicer. Just, go to London!
Joey: Oh, hold up, I'll walk out with you. Now, Rach, when she taught you to kiss, you were at camp, and.. were you wearing any kinda little uniform, or- (Rachel exits and slams the door in his face.) That's fine, yeah...
Chandler: Okay, last night at dinner, when the meals came, she put half her chicken piccata on my plate and took my tomatoes.
Chandler: Actually, no. No, it felt right. You know, it felt like uhm... I can't believe we haven't been doing this the whole time.
Mr. Geller: Well, the white seems to be untouched. (He throws it back into the box as Mr. Geller moves a tarp and makes a discovery.) Uh-oh.
[Scene: A Tap Class, the girls are standing at the door.]
[Scene: The Wedding Chapel, continued from last season. Chandler and Monica are about to get married.]
Monica: All right, look at my on the back page.
Rachel: The ring from the cave, yeah.
Monica: No! Really! Any time Ross makes a toast everyone cries, and hugs him, and pats him on the back and they all come up to me and say, "God, your brother." Know what theyll say this year? "God, you"
CHANDLER: I was just telling Joey about the opening in Fleischman's group.
Ross: (British) Come again? Whats-whats this nonsense? (Giggles.) (American.) All right, Im-Im not English. Im from Long Island. I was really nervous and the accent just uh, just came out. Im sorry. So, if we could just get back to the lecture. Umm, were there any questions? (Everyone raises their hands) About paleontology. (They all put their hands down.) All right, look I was just trying to make a good first impression. Obviously, I screwed up. But what you guys think of me is really important because Im-Im hoping to get a permanent job here. So if you just give me another chance to make a good impression
Phoebe: It was really sweet. The last thing she said to me was; "Okay dear, you go get the eggs and I'm gonna get the yogurt and we'll meet at the checkout counter." And y'know what? We will meet at the checkout counter.
Ross: Yeah, that's how I know. I'm Ross by the way.
Rachel: Well look, if you dont like this (The audiences laughter at Chandlers progress cuts out the rest of Rachels line.)
CHAN: It's my game. You want the job or not?
Chandler: Because of the weekend, we had a fight.
(Chandler makes it into the bowl.)
Phoebe: Oh, no, I have the cutest Christmas story!
Phoebe: Okay do youOkay, do you have a search warrant? Because the last time I checked this was still America!
(She goes for his magazine and he grabs it away before she reaches it. But she was only using the magazine as a decoy because she grabs his cookie and coffee, takes a bite out of the cookie and drinks some of the coffee.)
(The real Wedding March begins playing from behind the closed doors of the chapel.)
Ross: Oh, yeah, that’s the same, I am sure there are thirty different species of poisonous swings!
(Phoebe buttons her lip, while the rest of the gang pretend theyre not there.)
Joey: Ah yeahwait a second now! Look were gonna have to set a spending limit on the date. I dont have the money to take her to a fancy place like that.
Phoebe: Okay, this is where you and I part ways. (She drops the blanket into the chute.) Noisy bitch!
Frank: I dont know, I mean, y'know, this is the city y'know, I just, I mean, I dont know.
Joey: Yeah, that's the uh, game we were playing.
[Scene: Central Perk, the gangs all there discussing the incident.]
Joey: Alright alright. You're a monkey. You're loose in the city. Where do you go?
(He goes up on stage, mimes like he's giving the speech, and Chandler takes his picture. However, before he gets down everyone starts clinking their glasses for a real speech.)
Rachel: Yeah, which, by the way Chandler, I would like back one of these days.
Ross: C'mon, you get the idea, ow-ow-ow we'll make our money back in no time!
Ross: (scornful) Grab a spoon. Do you know how long it's been since I've grabbed a spoon? Do the words 'Billy, don't be a hero' mean anything to you?
Monica: We got out pictures back from London. (Shows her one.) Here's all of us at the Tower of London.
Phoebe: Ohh! Oh, the Chelsea Reporter, ohh, this used to keep me so warm.
Chandler: (entering) All right! Okay! I think I am making some progress with Joey, when I went into the apartment he went straight into his bedroom but he only slammed the door once! (Ross is pleased.) I mean yeah, he gave me the finger while doing it.
Monica: Wait, wait, wait! (She puts a Shriner's hat on the turkey.)
JOEY: Well OK then. [oven timer goes off behind Chandler] Was that the oven timer?
[Scene: Richards Apartment, Monica is looking around and notices an African mask hanging on the wall.]
Ross: Right! Right! I justI want you to know that Im going to be there through this whole thing, okay? Okay? The doctors appointments, the uh, the Lamaze classes, uh baby-proofing the apartmentAlthough we could probably worry about that til after we get married.
Rachel: How would you like to sit in a chair that fully reclines, has a rolling massage, and speakers in the head rest?
ROSS: Alright, alright, here's the chance. Monica give him cash, Rachel give him your earrings. Something, now, anything. MONICA: No, I will not cave. RACHEL: Yeah, I'm with Mon. ROSS: Alright, alright, you know how you say I never seize the day? Well, alright, even though he's your super, I'm seizing. [approaches Mr. Treeger] Mr. Treeger, here is 50 bucks, merry Christmas. [Gives him the cash.]
Rachel: (Running to the ticket counter) Ooh, ooh, ooh,ooh,ooh. (Slightly out of breath) Hi.
Phoebe: Oh my God! I had the best time with Tim last night. He is so sweet! Oh, I cant wait to get sous-neath him.
[Scene: The street outside Central Perk, Rachel and Phoebe are talking and walking.]
tip the scales in my direction. Check it out, you can probably see it from the window. (They all head to the window.)
Danny: Yeah, what's the gala for?
Rachel: Yeah! Y'know, ever since I ran out on Barry at the wedding, I have wondered whether I made the right choice. And now I know.
(Monica turns to get the wine.� Chandler peeps through the peephole.� Joey, seeing something, peeps back.� Chandler ducks.� Monica returns with two glasses of wine.� She gives one to Joey.)
[Scene: Rosss classroom, he has just finished his lecture and the students are filing out.]
Joey: Id seen this thing on The Discovery Channel...
Phoebe: Well, hey, what if Kenny were the real brains behind the whole company? You know. What if Kenny hired that Ralph Lauren guy to be the pretty front man? Huh, did she ever think of that?
Ross: Joey, get out of the fridge.
MONICA: But I need it. Otherwords I'm gonna have to take that horrible diner job. You know, with the dancing and the costumes. I don't wanna have to wear flame retardant boobs.
Mrs. Waltham: Oh, am I on the radio?
(Carol suddenly screams in pain and grabs Chandler by the shirt.)
Monica: Wow, what's the bad news!
Monica: (entering and interrupting the guys escape attempt) Okay! The movers will be here in 11 hours. Rachel has not packed. Now, everybody has to help! Chandler, were gonna start with
Phoebe:...Then I've already seen this one! (Turns off the TV.)
The Teacher: If you're talking about feminism, I think you're right.
Phoebe: Yeah, her first day on a new spiritual plane and she's gonna come to the coffeehouse!
Carol: (yelling from the bathroom) Oh my God!
Phoebe: Ooh, my first birthday present... (delightedly examining the cardigan in her lap) ..oh, this is really...
[Cut to a shot of the coliseum in Rome, Italy.]
[Scene: Barry's office, Rachel is doing her makeup in the mirror on Barry's lamp as Barry enters.]
Phoebe: Y'know what, I can stay, Im gonna stay. Cause the last time I went skiing I was to afraid to jump off the chair lift, I just went around and around.
[Cut to Ross and Emily standing by the foosball table.]
Monica: (Closing the door) Goodbye Mr.Heckles.
(Phoebe and Mike look at him, and he goes over to the counter.)