words in movies
Rachel: (to the gang) Oh my God, Melissa Warburton. I dont think I have the energy for this.
Melissa: I-Ive got to go. This has been so great Ray-ray! (Gunther returns with her cigarettes.) Oh, there you are. (Takes them from Gunther.) (To Rachel) Umm, so listen, just call me. Heres my card. (Hands the card over.)
Monica: (telling Chandler the seating arrangement) Okay so this is where the band is. (Points.) And this is where the bar is. (Points) And all these pins have peoples names on them. (She has pins to show the seating at each of the tables.) And Rach, here you are. (Points to Rachels place.)
Chandler: This is so sad. I mean, I only have like ten pins.
Monica: Okay, I think thats it. The seating chart is done. This is our wedding. They all look like theyre having fun dont they?
Monica: Oh! (Gets up) Lets see, well if this is the wedding hall then umm (Walks away) youre parents will be at home in Queens.
Chandler: Well this is just sad!
Rachel: Umm, well lets see uh, this one is Tom Brokaw.
Rachel: (reading a tag) This one is uh Paul ONeil.
Rachel: He plays for the Yankees. Seriously, ESPN! Just once and a while, have it on in the background. (Chandler nods and Rachel grabs another tux) Ooh, this one was Pierce Brosnan!
Chandler: 007?! This is James Bonds tux?!
Chandler: Oh, its not just that, I would be Englands most powerful weapon. Jet setting heartbreaker on her majestys secret service. A man who fears no one; with a license to kill. (Worried.) Would Monica let me wear this?
Rachel: Huh. Does Monica know about this?
Phoebe: What is this? Whats going on?
Rachel: Hey, come on! I had this friend from college and I made the stupid mistake of telling Joey that one time she and I yknow kissed a little bit.
Joey: Why are you taking this away from me?
Rachel: Im not saying that Im a lesbian! Im just saying that this happened!
Rachel: All right, yknow what? If you dont want to believe me about this, why dont you just come with me to dinner tonight and she will tell you.
Ross: Well, you need something to make this day special? Hello! You-you-you have the most special thing of all! You are marrying the woman you love.
Joey: Come on! Look just-just telllet her know that you really want them to be there. Lets not forget, this is a woman that has sent you many lasagnas over the years.
Monica: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Yeah, hi! Mrs. Tribbiani? (Listens) Hi, this is Monica Geller. (Listens) Yeah Im just calling to say that Chandler and I uh, really hope you can make it to the wedding. Yeah, apparently a bunch of invitations that we sent werent delivered. Umm, I guess there was some screw up at the damn post office! (Joey nods his approval.) (Listens) T-Tell me about it! (Listens) Yeah, yeah, the US Post Office? No, more like US lost office! (Listens) What are they Irish?! (Joey gives her a thumbs up.)
Joey: Okay. Okay, I totally hear ya. Oo how about this? I vamp a little til they get there?
Phoebe: Rachel, its okay. You dont have to do this. I believe you. All right? Okay, if-if you say that you kissed Melissa, then you kissed Melissa.
Chandler: (trying on the jacket) Okay. Holy double-vented comfort Batman! (Finds something in the pocket) Whats this?
Chandler: An invitation for the At First Sight premiere? Oh my God! Val Kilmer didnt wear this in Batman! He wore it to the premiere of some tooty-fruity love story where he played a blind guy!
Joey: Okay. I will. Ohh! Check out what they got me to wear for the ceremony! (Runs to his apartment and returns wearing a rather silly hat.) Huh? I wear it like this when I marry you guys, and then this (He tilts it to the side of his head) is for party time.
Rachel: What?! Wait a minute! No wait a minute! (She does so.) Okay? Look, that night was the one wild thing I have ever done in my entire life, and Im not gonna let you take that away from me! Okay, so if you dont remember that, maybe you will remember this! (She grabs Melissa and kisses her on the lips.)
Phoebe: (without moving her lips, wearing a fake smile) Okay, I will. (to Rita) This is my husband Crap Bag.
Ross: Oh! You are gonna love it! (The girl is looking in the other direction as Ross is taking off his own coat, revealing the pink and white ladies shirt) and I'm so glad, we're finally doing this.
Director: (To Cameraman) Make sure you get this, theyre gonna want it for the bloopers show. (To everyone) Alright cut! Listen up everyone, when we start again its gonna be the countdown to new years, so I wanna see everybodys excitement.
Chandler: All right everybody! Just be quiet! Be quiet! Be quiet!! Pipe-pipe-pipe down! (They settle down) What is the matter with you people?! This woman was trying to do a nice thing for you. She was making candy so she could try to get to know all of you, and Ill bet that not one of you can tell me her name! Am I right?
Rachel: Whats this? Is this Rosss wedding invitation?
Joey: You don't think this is going to be a big break for me?
Dina: Joey, I cant stand the thought of having this baby with you mad at me. I want him to have his uncle. Is my baby gonna have his Uncle Joey?
Ross: I think I might know what this is about.
Rachel: Pheebes, this woman is voluntarily bald.
Kate: I have a question about this scene.
<they hug and Rachel has this disgusted look on her face and then Emma starts crying>
Phoebe: What are you, what are you talking about? How did this happen?
Chandler: Really? So, you're gonna stick with this 'it's all for her' thing?
PHOEBE: This is my father, this is a picture of my dad.
Chandler: Two. This photographer, who seemed really dull. And this actor guy, who Im not sure about, because when he called and I answered the phone Chandler Bing, he said Whoa-whoa, short message.
Rachel: I can make you a legend. I can make you this generations Milton Berle.
Rachel: Do you really not know where Im going with this? (Phoebe nods, "No.") It left! Its one huge room!
Joey: Hey OK great, what would you do if I did this? (Swings to punch Chandler, he moves and he ends up punching Ross, knocking him off the stool. Ross then gets up and just stares at Joey.)
Ross: No! Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah! You can have this back when the five pages are done! (After Joey walks past, Ross throws the ball down in pain.) Ahh! (Chandler shows him the burn spots on his oven mitts.)
Rachel: No, I-I just dont know how you decide who to hire. I mean Ive got it narrowed down to two people. One of them has great references and a lot of experience and then theres this guy
Rachel: Oh God. Im sorry about this.
Ross: Yeahoh! Hey listen umm, Emily found this wedding dress in London
Rachel: Joey, is what she just said ummOh my God. (Looks around the room.) You were actually gonna (Chandler picks this moment to return to the living room.) (Rachel stares in shock.)
Joey: (angrily) Thursday! Look if you need help remembering think of like this, the third day. All right? Monday, one day. Tuesday, two day. Wednesday, when? Huh? What day? Thursday! The third day! Okay?!
Rachel: Oh! Tommy, this is Ross. Ross, Tommy.
Phoebe: Oh! Since tomorrow. I met this really cute guy in the park and he like y'know, jogs, and blades, and swims, and so y'know we made a deal thats hes going to teach me all sorts of jock stuff.
Monica: Uh-huh, but I'm sure you can handle this. I mean, I have won awards for my organizational skills, but, uh, I'm sure you'll do fine.
Rachel: Honey, this really is an incredible thing to do for them, but there are things to think about.
Monica: Okay, this one I like!
Phoebe: Yeah, this is the guy I was telling you about.
Monica: (on phone) Hi, umm I know this is last minute, but weve decided to throw an impromptu baby shower for Rachel today.
[cut to another clip, this one is from The One With The Prom Video]
Chandler: I can't believe you did this. (Walks toward the door)
Monica: Okay, look, this could be a really long game.
Rachel: All right, look you guys... Look, we appreciate all the advice, but this is between Joey and me and I think we can handle it...
JOEY: Hey, are you cool with this. I mean, I don't want to leave you high and dry.
Joey: Sure! (Monica gets very depressed) But hey, you know this way sounds good too.
Phoebe: This isn't a good deed, you just wanted to get on TV! This is totally selfish.
Phoebe: (to Rachel) Ok, I just wanna be really sure this time. Andie McDowell's the girl from Four Weddings and a Funeral, right?
Susan: I've literally never been this happy.
Rachel: Yknow, like the thing when you put the phone in your pants? (He starts laughing.) Tag! Im serious! This isnt funny! Those contracts absolutely had to go out today!
Chandler: So you're really okay with this?
Rachel: All right, now dont judge me. I normally wait until my date leaves, but you live here. Im ripping into this swan.
Monica: See, this is why I told you never get involved with your assistant! And here is no such thing as keeping secrets when it comes to affairs. (To Chandler) Did you hear that Chandler? No such thing!
Kathy: Wow! You are really good at this.
JOEY: Thanks, yeah. I love this but ya know what, it makes me wanna pee.
Phoebe: But everybody sings. It's so much fun! Last time this adorable old man got out there, forgot all of the words, flipped outand everyone booed him off the stage. So funny.
Rachel: Ross, that was a Halloween costume, unless you would like me to go to this thing as Little Bo Peep.
Amy: Wait, this is important! Can Ella wait? (Rachel goes to Emma)
Rachel: No!! You are getting married! This is all I have.
Luisa: You're both gonna have to take this up with the judge.
Phoebe: Oh, Jack Bing. I love that. Ooh, it sounds like a '40s newspaper guy, you know? "Jack Bing, Morning Gazette. I'm gonna blow this story wide open!"
Ross: Only when it was damp!! (To Rachel) I cant believe you-you told people about this?! Everybody knew?! Yknow what? (To Will) Im back in the club!
Transcribers Note: This is stuff we never saw from all of the seasons, so for all of the scene settings I will be using the current arrangements. Even though some of the out takes take place when Chandler was living with Joey and Rachel was living with Monica, when Joey and Chandler were living in Monica and Rachels, and the current arrangements.
Monica: Ross, how long have you been planning this wedding?
Jay Leno: (on TV) ...Now what is this about you-you being arrested i-in London? What is that all about?
Joey: Hey, do we do this too much?
Ross: No, no, with him. (He mimes holding the baby like a football.) I'm on this field, and they, they hike me the baby... and I, I know I've gotta do something 'cause the Tampa Bay defence is comin' right at me.
Larry: You look beautiful this evening.
PHOEBE: What? Is it - is this 'cause of what Ross said?
Chandler: I hate this thing!
Monica: Oh, I so can't believe this! My uterus is an inhospitable environment? I was trying so hard to be a good hostess!
Dr. Rosen: This is a great place. How long have you lived here?
Ross: Look, you guys I just wanna say, I really, really appreciate you spending this time with me. Its been a pretty hard time right now, so I just wanna say thanks.
CHANDLER: Guys guys, check this out.
Phoebe: Ooh, this is cool...it says in some parts of the world, people actually eat the placenta. (Joey grimaces)
Rachel: I dont know. I dont know how I feel. This is all happening so fast. I have to make all these decisions that I dont want to make. (Takes another sip of champagne and spits it back out) Somebody just take this away from me!!
ROSS: I don't know what to do. What am I gonna do? I mean, this, this is like a complete nightmare.
Kathy: I'm sorry, it's just this Ernie Cofax thing on in a few minutes I wanted to watch.
Chandler: I can't believe this.
Chandler: This is not going to work.
Joey: You guys, can we please not watch this all right.
PHOEBE: I hate this. 'Cause I tell you, I had the most amazing two weeks planned for us, and almost everything I had in mind, we had to be a lot closer than this.
{There's another continuity error here. Before Monica says I love you, Chandler's holding the vests so that you couldn't see the collar, you could see all three, and they were folding nicely. After she says the line and the camera cuts back to Chandler, you can only see two out of the three, you can see the collar of the top one, and it looks like it was folded sloppily, unlike before. Hey, you notice things while spending this much time on this!}
JOEY: Look at this, how did I spend so much money?
Joey: (glares at him for a moment, then admits grudgingly) Maybe. Well, I just think you guys can do better than this house, you know? Or any other house for that matter.
Monica: Umm, I-I really don't want to tell this story.
Chandler: (looking around) Did I go to this school?
Phoebe: Yeah, this book was light years ahead of its time.
Joey: Man, we gotta do something about that guy. This morning, I caught him looking into our apartment. It creeps me out! I feel like I can't do stuff!
Monica: This is so great! And Im gonna be your babys aunt!
Chandler: So I was right. This is what it feels like to be right. (Pause) Its oddly unsettling.
Rachel: Well Thats yknowThatsWeve been alone for the last twenty minutes were doing okay. Besides yknow what? I-IMaybe we wont be alone, cause lately I-Ithings have been happening between me and Ross, yknow? Right before I went into labor, we-we had this kiss. Yknow? So it might be the the beginning of something.
Chandler: Oh, this is soo bad. (doesnt see Mary-Angela)
Ross: I can't believe Chandler is missing this!
Rachel: Monica, is this true?
Phoebe: That's odd, 'cause this dog's been living here for the past 3 days
Joey: Why are you doing this?
Ross: Thanks guys! (They both sit down on either side of him.) I really appreciate this, yknow, but you dont have to rub my butt.
Phoebe: Well, Ive got to get out of this bed, Im going crazy here. Crazy!
Chandler: Actually, no. No, it felt right. You know, it felt like uhm... I can't believe we haven't been doing this the whole time.
The Assistant Director: (to another actor) Richard? Were ready for you. (Richard approaches.) Joey Tribbiani? This is Richard Crosby hes playing Vincent.
Ross: (screaming) Everybody put their balloons down!!! (There is a temporary cease fire.) Now this is a nice suit!! (Shows everyone where he was hit.)
Monica: No! Really! Any time Ross makes a toast everyone cries, and hugs him, and pats him on the back and they all come up to me and say, "God, your brother." Know what theyll say this year? "God, you"
Monica: (to Phoebe) I swear I've seen birds do this on Wild Kingdom.
Rachel: Well look, if you dont like this (The audiences laughter at Chandlers progress cuts out the rest of Rachels line.)
Phoebe: Oh my God! I killed him! I killed another one! And this curse is getting stronger too, to bring down something that big.
Phoebe: Okay do youOkay, do you have a search warrant? Because the last time I checked this was still America!
Rachel: Ross do you realise this is the first time in my life Im doing something I actually care about. This is the first time in my life Im doing something that Im actually good at. I mean. if you dont get that...
Joey: (excited) Thanks dude!!!This is GREAT!! (leaves Rachel very touched on the couch and goes into his room)