words in movies
Ross: I have to say Tupolo Honey by Van Morrison.
Phoebe: Oh, okay that explains it. I got a call at two in the morning, but all I could hear was, like, this high squeaky sound, so I thought okay its like a mouse or a opossum. But then I realized where would a mouse or a opossum get the money to make the phone call.
Janice: (entering and singing) Monica and Rachel had syrup, now I can get my man to cheer up. (laughs hysterically) Good morning Joey.
Janice: Oh, I wish. Look, honey, you have that report to finish, and I gotta go see my lawyer.
Chandler: Well, maybe I won't kiss you, and then you'll have to stay.
Monica: It's some of Richard's hair! (holds it close to Ross) What do I do with this?
Phoebe: Ooh. Oh. It looks like, like a tiny little person drowning in your cereal. (Ross gives her this look, like 'Yeah, doesn't it', and gets up to dump it down the drain.)
Ross: You need to get some sleep.
Monica: I need to get some Richard.
Phoebe: Maybe, because you told him not to.
Ross: Nooo, I had to return it to the costume place.
Rachel: You really, really need to get some sleep, honey.
Phoebe: Rach, look! (she holds two buns up to her ears to make her hair look like the Princess Leia 'do.) Oh, hi! Where is my strong Ross Skywalker to come rescue me. (Ross stands up horrified) There he is.
Chandler: You know, you should really go on this show. All right, listen, I got three tickets to the Rangers tonight. What'd ya' say?
Joey: I say, 'I am there!' Cool! Aw, is Ross going to?
Joey: No, Yeeees. God, how do I say this. (walks into the kitchen, Chandler follows closely, he turns around and gets startled). Oh, hi, you know that girl from the Greek restaurant with the hair (holds his hands up to signify she has big hair)?
Joey: Look, I don't hate Janice, she's-she's just a lot to take, you know.
Joey: Oh, hey. Come on man, don't look at me like that, she used to drive you nuts before too, remember?
Joey: Look, what do you want me to say?
Chandler: I want you to say that you like her!
Joey: I can't. It's like this chemical thing, you know. Every time she starts laughing, I just wanna (grimaces and tenses up) pull my arm off just so that I can have something to throw at her.
Chandler: Thanks for trying. (grabs the ticket and starts to leave) Oh, and by the way there is no Count Rushmore!
Rachel: Okay, who are you talking to when you do that?
Ross: Look, that was supposed to be like a private, personal thing between us.
[Scene: Monica's bedroom, Phoebe is trying to relax her.]
Phoebe: ( in a soothing voice) Relax every muscle in your body. Listen to the plinky-plunky music. Okay, now close you eyes, and think of a happy place. Okay, tell me your happy place.
Phoebe: Well, okay, fine, use my happy place. Okay, I'm just gonna, I have to ask that you don't move anything.
Monica: All right, I'll try not to.
Monica: Okay, this isn't working. I'm still awake and now I have to pee.
Janice: A little birdie told me something about you wanting to rip your arm off and throw it at me.
Janice: All right, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, we've got to do something about our little situation here Joey. So, this is my idea: you and me spending some quality time together.
Joey: Does it have to be a whole day?
Janice: Yes, because that's how long it takes to love me.
Monica: (crying) So, I went down to the post office, and it turns out it was those videos that I ordered for Richard about the Civil War. He loved the Civil War.
Phoebe: Monica, do you want us to take you home?
Monica: Uh, huh. (to Ross) Or maybe to a galaxy far, far away. (Rachel, Monica, and Phoebe leave)
Ross: So, uh, the other night Rachel and I are in bed talking about fantasies, and I happened to describe a particular Star Wars thing....
Joey: Yeah, yeah. We went to a Mets game, we got Chinese food, and you know, I love this woman. You have got competition buddy.
Janice: I just came by to give you a kiss, I have to go pick up the baby, so. I'll see you later sweetheart, you too Chandler. (laughs)
Joey: No man, that's huge! Now, I know I can stand to be around her, which means I get to hang out with you, which is kinda the whole point, anyway.
Mr. Geller: Well, I just wanted to make sure you were okay.
Mr. Geller: Honey, relationships are hard. Like with your Mom and me. You know after we graduated college we broke up for a while. It seems her Father, your Grandfather, wanted her to travel around Europe, like he did. Of course, he got to do it on Uncle Sam's nickel, because he was also strafing German troop trains at the time. However, (turns around and sees that Monica is sleeping and puts a blanket around her, kisses her, picks up the cigar, and starts watching the video)
[Scene: Ross's bedroom, Ross is humming the Star Wars theme. Rachel enters, with her hair done up like Princess Leia's, and wearing a belly dancer's outfit, to simulate the gold bikini thing.]
Rachel: And uh, yeah, I didnt really, I didnt want to say anything, but it kinda it just, it kinda kept coming back to me, and umm, remember we were in the casino and for some reason thought it would be funny to eat a lot of grapes. And uh, and I thought it would be funnier if we got married. So as a, as a compromise we decided first to get married, and then (Ross joins in) to eat a lot of grapes. So umm, sorry I got us into this mess.
Emily: Ross umm, theres something that Ive got to tell you, theres-theres someone else.
Monica: (going through her pockets) No... (to Chandler and Phoebe) Either of you girls got a quarter?
Joshua: No, no, no, shes nice but, yknow, it just it made me realize that Im just not, Im just not ready to be dating, yknow?
(Cut to Chandler and Ross. Phoebe comes out of the ladies room and they run toward her.)
Phoebe: I decided to pee.
The Librarian: Well, yes! Just give me five minutes, I just have to find someone to cover my shift.
Mike: Do I have a minute to go to the bathroom?
Chandler: Im just trying to find the right moment, you know?
Mike: Is that what you say to Chandler?
Monica: (entering, happily) All right everybody! Everybody guess what? I just convinced Paul to give us a test next week!
(the screen says "6 to win" and "types of trees")
Phoebe: Why, do I have a feeling thats not as happy as it sounds? (Joey points out one going into the chipper to her, as this haunty, demonic music starts to play in the background) No! Nooooo!!! (she winces in horror and hides her face against Joeys shoulder, as she sees the tree spit out from the chipper.)
Jason: (to Phoebe) I-I cant believe this! You-youve slept with him?!
Chandler: (angrily) Well next time ask! Or at least wait for me to ask! (He storms out.)
Molly: Nice to meet you guys (to Chandler and Joey).
Chandler: All right, we havent had sex yet. Okay, whats the big deal? Yknow? This is special, and I want our love to grow until we move on to the next level.
Phoebe: Oh, happy my wedding day to you!
Phoebe: Listen to this! My reading was wrong, Im not going die!
Ross: Yeah, uh... and then I figured after you win, we could all go out to the balcony and see a night rainbow with gremlins dancing on top of it!
Joey: Dont worry man, I get to bring a guest. Well show him.
Monica: Oh. So nice of her to pull my hair, 'till I dropped the key!
[Scene: Outside Central Perk, Chandler and Monica are waiting for Phoebe to arrive with the cab.]
Joey: (to Mike) Hello Michael.
[Scene: Central Perk, the gangs putting their coats on to leave.]
(Phoebe grabs Gunther and kisses him. He then falls to the couch in shock.)
Joey: Oh, hey, you guys are finally gonna get to meet Kate!
[Cut to Ross at the kiddie table. He reaches for something and a fart noise emanates which causes the kids to laugh.]
Chandler: (to Tag) Okay, you are new!
(She leaves. Chandler presses his face to the glass door after her, stroking the window lovingly. He then turns to the security camera and starts talking to it.)
Monica: (to Danny) We'll be right there! (To Rachel) Can't you just say it starts later?
Chandler: I'm not supposed to tell you.
Chandler: (smiling to himself too) That's what I was doing too.
Ross: I'm not supposed to tell you!
Ross: Dude. You're married to my sister.
Joanna: Would you? Or, is it just to sad and desperate, and y'know something that Sophie would do?
(all eyes turn to Rachel)
Chandler: Unless Snoopy says it to Charlie Brown, I think we're okay.
Rachel: Right! But, none of that compared to how kind and-and how gentle and thoughtful he is. (Rubbing his shoulder.)
Joey: (to the waiter) What are you still doin here?! I told you, lobster ravioli!
Phoebe: (to Monica) Help me.
Monica: You really want me to come back?
Phoebe: I want you to be Crazy Bitch again.
Monica: Oh man! If I had known I was coming to this party I never would have gotten married!
(Chandler makes a 'Cross my heart' sign. It starts to rain and he taps on the window.)
Phoebe: (Turning to Mike) What do you think?
Joey: Yknow what? I think thats enough for now. Yeah. I dont want to be over rehearsed.
Mike: I think I wanna get married to you today.
Ross: Yeah, and to save you from any embarrassment umm, I think maybe I should talk first.
RACHEL: Ok, look you guys, I really don't want to get into this right now. I think it'll just make everyone uncomfortable.
Phoebe's Assistant: We've got a couple changes in your schedule. Your 4:00 herbal massage has been pushed back to 4:30 and Miss Somerfield canceled her 5:30 shiatsu.
[Scene: Rachels Room, Joey moves Rosss coat to get the tissues Rachel wants and the engagement ring box Mrs. Geller gave him falls out of the pocket it was inside. Joey goes to one knee, picks up the box, opens it, and sees that its an engagement ring.]
ROSS: Oh, oh that's right, I forgot about your ability to fuse metal.
(we cut to Monica)
Rachel: Joey, Emma's right here! You promised not to bring girls home in the middle of the day anymore.
Monica: Yeah, yeah, it's interesting.. but y'know what? Just for fun, let's see what it looked like in the old spot. (She moves it.) Alright, just to compare. Let's see. Well, it looks good there too. Let's just leave it there for a while.
Chandler: Well, you have to honest with her! Otherwise you may think that youre going down the same path, but youre really going down different ones.
Joey: (whispering to Phoebe) Okay...
Rachel: Remember when we went to Central Park and rented boats?.. That was fun.
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's class; the class has ended and Phoebe is talking to one of her classmates.]
Rachel: Ok. If you really need to.
Chandler: (picking up a plastic cup similar to the one he deposited his specimen in) It is not okay that I'm aroused by this now.
Ross: And what(notices the stenographer is still typing)What are you typing that for? Did you hear what she said? We dont get the annulment. Dont type that! What?! Stop typing! (He goes over to where the stenographer is typing and in the process pushes Rachel out of his way.) Hey! Stop typing! (Hes still typing.) Stop typing! Stop typing!!
Joey: (sits down next to Ross) First of all, Utah? Dude, you can't just make stuff up!
Phoebe: Yea. Can I please, please, please talk to one of the best men? This is going to be the last time I promise.
JOEY: Ahh, alright, alright, alright, I was young and I just wanted a job, OK. But at the last minute I couldn't go through with it so they let me be the guy who comes in to fix the copier but can't 'cause there's people havin' sex on it.
[Scene: Joey's apartment. Phoebe is trying to teach Joey French.]
PHOEBE: I told you not to do that yet. And, she wants to do a video.
Joey: Okay, hey, museum geeks, partys over. Okay. Wave bye-bye to the nice lady. There you go. Back to your parents basement. All right. (The museum geeks exit and Joey unlocks his door and lets the chick and the duck out.) Come on boys, come on out! Here you go. All right.
Phoebe: Hi. Um, I want to start with a song thats about that moment when you suddenly realize what life is all about. OK, here we go. (plays a chord, then the lights go out) OK, thank you very much.
Joey: You don't know how long we're gonna be in here! We may have to repopulate the Earth.
PHOEBE: Ok, ok, she's taking the trash out so I can get you out of here but it has to be now, she'll be back any minute.
Woman No. 2: I thought you wanted to adopt your cat.
(They start kissing and Joey starts to undo her bra, but fails completely)
Monica: Yeah, you were, but you decided to make salmon because you had some left over at the restaurant. And then you realised if you (Points at Rachel) bitched about it, then you (Points to herself) would stop cooking, and you (Points at Rachel) would have to make your famous baked potato and Diet Coke.
[Cut back to the cast and Conan.]
Phoebe: (noticing a guy sitting by the green post looking at her) Oh wait a second you guys for the last couple weeks Ive been that guy everywhere I go. We take the same bus. We go to the same bookstore, the same dry cleaners; maybe hes the tea guy. (He gets up to leave, and smiles at Phoebe.)
Richards Date: Oh, thats real pretty. Wait a minute, dont I get to see the bedroom?
Phoebe: But lately all the guys I meet seem really nice at first, then they turn out to be the biggest jerks.
Rachel: (To Ross) So you were in an I Hate Rachel club?
Ross: (to the class) Right! So when Rigby got his samples back from the laboratory he made a startling discovery! What he believed to be igneous, was in fact sedimentary. Imagine his consternation when(sees Monica and Rachel.) Oh bloody hell.
Monica: Just a minute! (To Chandler) Thats Mrs. Tribbiani!
Monica: Daddy! I dont think we need to hear about the specific positions you and mom had sex.
Ross: (waking up) What? (notices that there is now a beautiful woman sitting next to him)
Phoebe: Oh well, all right, I got (Ross hands her a bag) (To Ross) thank you, I got uh, this yknow "I want a job sweater." (Holds up the same sweater.)
Joey: (to Ross and Rachel) I've been here the whole time!
Janine: I was just coming over here to apologize for my behavior! Id really like it if we could be friends.
RACH: Oh, look at me, look at me. Oh, I'm on a date with a really great guy, all I can think about is Ross and his cat and his... Julie. I just want to get over him. gosh, why can't I do that?
Rachel: Well its hard to tell (Rachel gets up to get a closer look, only shes having some trouble.) Oh God, if she would just stop moving.
Tag: Then we went to this bar and he hooked us up with all these women!
Phoebe: Where did you go to do it?
Ben: Im not allowed to have soda.
Chandler: So there is no good time to ask that question.
Phoebe: Thanks! Honey, would you want me to take your name?
Joey: I gotta a lot of nice stuff to say about you guys, ok? And I know how much you wanna have a baby, you know, and I would love to help you get one.
Ross: Well I I havent actually told her yet. I dont want to scare her off, yknow?
PHOEBE: You just abandoned your whole belief system. I mean, before, I didn't agree with you, but at least I respected you. How, how, how are you going to go into work tomorrow? How, how are you going to face the other science guys? How, how are you going to face yourself? Oh! That was fun. So who's hungry?
Chandler: Well, I think you need to come out of your shell just a little.
Rachel: I know, I mean, why can't parents just stay parents? (She walks over near Chandler and his gaze stays very obviously on her chest) Why do they have to become people? Why do they have... (Notices Chandler) Why can't you stop staring at my breasts?
[Scene: Erics Apartment, hes opening the door to reveal Phoebe.]