words in movies
Phoebe: If you had to, what would you give up, food or sex?
Chandler: (to Phoebe) It's like a giant hug.
[Scene: Central Perk. Rachel and Phoebe are looking at some photos and they're sitting next to the window.]
Phoebe: Oh, thank God, 'cause that thing's really creepy! (looking outside the window) Look, there's Chandler. (he's on the street, talking to a woman)
Rachel: No, you're not! Last week you thought Ross was trying to kill you!
Phoebe: Well, I'm sorry but it's hard to believe that anyone would tell a story that dull just to tell it! (looking outside) See, there's something going on with them. Look, he's getting into the car with her!
Phoebe: Oh yeah? Well, let's see. (she takes her mobile phone) Ok, duck down. (they both get down to hide themselves. Phoebe calls Chandler)
Phoebe: Oh, hi Chandler. It's Phoebe. Uhm... I know that Monica is working today so...(back to Central Perk) ...I was wondering if you want to come to the movies with me and Rachel.
Chandler: Oh, uhm... I have to work too. Yeah, I'm stuck at the office all day.
Phoebe: (shocked) Oh, well, it's a shame that you-that you miss the movie 'cause we were gonna see, you know, either "Liar, Liar" or "Betrayal", or... "An Affair To Remember".
Phoebe: (to Chandler at the phone) Okay, we-we'll talk to you later. Okay, bye.
Monica: And Nancy said that it's really under price, because the guy lost his job and has to move in with his parents!
Rachel: I’m telling you guys, we followed them out to a house in Westchester, the went in for like forty-five minutes and then they came out looking pretty happy!
Joey: Chandler? Forty-five minutes? Well, something is not right. I just can’t believe he would do this to Monica!
Ross: I don’t know. Phoebe, if one of us saw Mike with another woman would you want us to tell you?
Monica: If only there were a smaller one to clean this one!
Rachel: Phoebe and I saw Chandler with a blonde woman today outside on the street and then we followed them to a house in Westchester.
Joey: (walking towards her to hold her and support her) Monica, you understand what we are saying, right?
Monica: Yeah, sure... uhm, I'm devastated, obviously... (to the rest) Did you think the neighborhood was homey? (Chandler enters)
Joey: (to Chandler) You son of a bitch!
Monica: (goes to Chandler) Phoebe and Rachel saw you with Nancy today and... em... they think you're having an affair.
Monica: (turns to them) Ok, alright, you guys, you'd better sit down, this is pretty big.
Chandler: Yeah (motions them to sit and they do) I'm not having an affair. Nancy is our realtor.
Monica: When we found out that we're gonna get this baby, Chandler and I started talking and we decided that we didn't want to raise a kid in the city.
Phoebe: Have you thought about what you would be giving up? You can't move out of the city, what if you want Chinese food at 5am? Or a fake Rolex that breaks as soon as it rains or an Asian hooker sent right to your door?
Joey: No, no, it's not, don't listen to him! (to Ross) I'm gonna thump you! (points his fist at him)
Ross: (to Joey) It's ok, because they have to get it out of their system, okay (back to Mon and Chan), but you're going to realize, this is the only place, you wanna be.
Monica: (smiling) It's so sweet. It really is. It has this big yard that leads down to this stream and then there's these old maple trees... (gets cut off)
Chandler: (goes towards Joey) You know that's not the reason Joe. (Joey hugs him and after, he takes something from the fridge and puts it in his mouth. He goes back to where he was standing before)
Monica: We think if you saw it, you'd understand. I mean you guys were there. (Points to Rachel and Phoebe) It is beautiful, isn't it?
Rachel: Well, it is, all right? When we were out there today, all I kept thinking was: I can't believe Chandler is screwing this woman, but MAN this would be a nice place to live!
Ross: Yeah, I mean, if you moved there, you have to leave here. I mean, how can you leave this place?
[We fade to some flashback scenes.]
Rachel: (talking on the phone) C'mon Daddy, listen to me! All of my life, everyone has always told me, 'You're a shoe! You're a shoe, you're a shoe, you're a shoe!'. And today I just stopped and I said, 'What if I don't wanna be a shoe? What if I wanna be a- a purse, y'know? Or a- or a hat! No, I don't want you to buy me a hat, I'm saying that I am a ha- It's a metaphor, Daddy!
Rachel: Ow, that had to hurt!
Rachel: No Mon, you want to put them in concentric circles. I want to do this.
Phoebe: (walks him to the kitchen) Easy. Step. How did it get on?
Joey: I put it on to scare Chandler!
(They hear Monica trying to unlock the door. So Phoebe quickly pushes his head down onto the table to make it look like the turkey is just sitting on a platter and not stuck on Joey's head.)
Monica: I got it! How about, if we win, they have to get rid of the rooster?
Joey: (shocked) Dah!! (Chandler motions for him to calm down.)
Ross: (to the girls) Chandler was how old when he first touched a girl’s breast?
Monica: It’s umm, it has something to do with transponding.
Joey: Hey, don’t get mad at us! No one forced you to raise the stakes!
Ross: Chandler!!! Chandler!!! (He opens the door to the apartment but is stopped by the chain; Chandler and Monica quickly stop making out and try to get dressed.) Chandler, I saw what you were doing through the window! Chandler, I saw what you were doing to my sister! Now get out here!
Chandler: (To Monica) Wow! Listen, we had a good run. You know, what was it? Four? Five months? I mean, that's more than most people have in a lifetime! So, good-bye, take care, bye-bye then! (He kisses her and starts to climb out the balcony window)
Ross: (To Chandler) I thought you were my best friend, this is my sister! My best friend and my sister! I-I cannot believe this!
Monica: I'm so sorry that you had to find out this way. I'm sorry, but iit-t's true, I love him too.
Phoebe: Ok, you guys, I don’t mean to make things worse, but umm, I don’t want to live with Rachel anymore.
Phoebe: You’re just so mean to each other! And I don’t want to end up like that with Rachel. I still like you!
Phoebe: That’s nice. I like having things to read in the bathroom.
Rachel: Well y’know, I don’t want you to be cold.
Monica: And when I told her that I was gonna be moving in with Chandler, she was really supportive. (To Rachel) (Starts to cry) You were so great. You made it so easy. And now you have to leave. And I have to live with a boy!! (They both break down in tears.)
Chandler: Little toast here. I know this isn't exactly the kind of Thanksgiving that all of you all planned, but for me, this has been really great, you know, I think because it didn't involve divorce or projectile vomiting. Anyway, I was just thinking, I mean, if you'd gone to Vail, and if you guys'd been with your family, if you didn't have syphilis and stuff, we wouldn't be all together, you know? So I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm very thankful that all of your Thanksgivings sucked.
Ross: And hey, here's to a lousy Christmas.
[Scene: We're back to the present. Chandler and Monica's. They're all still at the kitchen table.]
(The phone rings and Chandler goes to get it)
Chandler: Hello? It's Nancy, they responded to our offer.
(Chandler listens to what Nancy says)
Chandler: (to Nancy) Okay, thanks... (to Monica) They passed. They said they wouldn't go a penny under the asking price.
Phoebe: (to Monica) You're gonna be okay?
Chandler: I just didn't want to tell you in front of them.
Chandler: Well, I didn't know how to tell you before, but... We got the house.
Chandler: But honey you don't have to.
Monica: I'm going to get bigger!
Monica: Oh my god. We're trying to get pregnant so he's probably starting to freak out about the fact that my body is going to change.
Chandler: Were moving to Tulsa! (Makes a excited expression on his face)
Chandler: God why why would you want to do that to yourself!?
RACHEL: Ross, you have to understand that your nice thing makes us feel this big.
Conan: (to Courtney) You-youve worn a fat suit on the show. And, a lot of people love you in the fat suit. Do you like wearing the fat suit? Is it fun?
Phoebe: You guys make a very attractive couple. (The camera cuts to a shot of the picture and we see that Monica is posing with Joey instead of Chandler.)
Ross: The guy who took Rachel to the prom? Why is he calling you?
Mike: But I don't want this to end.
Mike: I want to live with you too! Let's do that!
Monica: That is so sweet! (She kisses him and turns to add some sugar to her tea.)
Ross: I had to talk loud because the movie was loud!
Phoebe: I don't want it to end either.
Chandler: Hey! Ready to go?
CHANDLER: I don't know what to say. I'm sorry that we make more money than you. But we're not gonna feel guilty about it. We work really hard for it.
Monica: Oh, then bring it on! Oh, unless of course your afraid you might lose to a bunch of girls.
Monica: Im Catwoman, who wants to borrow the dress when youre too big for it.
(Turns to look at Professor Sherman, only to discover that he is sleeping)
[Cut to the waiting room, a triumphant Frank rushes in.]
(Monica helps Rachel over to a vacant seat.)
Chandler: Then why-why is she going to a play?!
Phoebe: Besides, it might be kinda fun to form the new A-Team.
Chandler: (to them) Its okay, I got a plan.
Chandler: I did! But the store wouldnt take her back! So then I took her to the shelter, and you know what I found out?
[Cut back to the cast and Conan.]
Joey: Dude relax! It could happen to anyone.
Rachel: Uh You didnt propose to me, Chandler didnt propose to me, but Joey did.
Monica: No, no! Give it to me!
Ross: Okay. (The girls leave.) (to Tommy) So uh, well, this-this is uh, this is awkward.
Joey: A couple? Like two people? Like (points to himself) one (points to Phoebe), two people?
Joey: Oh this is great! I might actually get to play Ben's dad!
Monica: Give it to me!
Rachel: (starts crying and speaking at the same time, making it almost impossible to understand what she's saying) I wouldn't know what I'm gonna do without you...
Monica: (To Mike) What are you doing here?
Monica: Who's that? (goes to open door)
Rachel: Ugh! Joey, I have to go.
Phoebe: Youre right. Youre right, hes just embracing life. We could all stand to be a little more like Parker. You know what? I am like him! Im a sunny, positive person.
(Phoebe and Mike sit next to each other)
Chandler: If we hadn't lost the game they never would've invented us to dinner tomorrow night.
Nurse: (To Ross) Rossy, we're ready for you.
Janice: I hate to be the one to say it, but honey you two (Her and Emma) are on your own.
Joey: Monicas chicken parm! Ill take care of it. (He picks up the phone) Hey Mr. Treeger, its Joey Tribbiani. Listen, I need to get into Monica and Chandlers apartment. Its an emergency. (Listens) Uhh, gas leak! Yeah oh, and bring garlic bread. (Hangs up.)
Chandler: I'm sorry, he's a little bit wound up, we had to stop at every maple candy stand on the way here.
Ross: (on phone) Okay, Andr� should be there in like 45 minutes. All rightie, bye bye. (to Phoebe) Just easier that way.
Phoebe: Listen, I wanted to ask you something about marriage.
Rachel: (stopping him) Hey! You cant leave Joey! You agreed to buy that boat, all right?! That is a contract! And plus if you leave, my boss is gonna kill me!
Rachel: Come on, I don't really want to be doing this right now. I am carrying a very heavy couch.
[Scene: Rachel and Monica's, everyone is getting ready to go to a banquet]
Ross: Actually, it looks really good. (Turns towards the window and now Phoebe starts jumping to divert his attention.)
Rachel: (to herself) Oh God.
Mrs. Geller: Theres nothing to discuss. Were not paying for your wine cellar.
Ross: Well, um, actually, I-I took her to the planetarium. Thats-thats where we had our first date. Um, she walked in and I had the room filled with lilies, her favorite flower
Phoebe: I know, I want that too, but IS that going to make it too hard?
Phoebe: Im going to let him.
(She goes one way; he goes the other. The camera pans back to Chandler and Monica, and needless to say, they're standing there dumbstruck.)
Monica: That I was going to eat him.
[Cut back to Rachels date.]
Rachel: Oh, alright. The weirdest place would have to be... (sigh)... oh, the foot of the bed.
Ross: He couldn't even tell me! He said it was just some sort of skin... abnormality. And the worst thing is he-he-he said, he said, without being able to identify it, he was reluctant to remove it.
Ross: Cause I know what youre trying to pull here. Okay? Its not gonna work.
Chandler: (looking around at the others)I'll ask. (To Ross) Boohaki?
Mike: Yeah, look, and I don't want you to feel like you have to give me your key just because...
(Rachel finally manages to open the door, but the door chain is on.)
Russell: There are a couple of forms to fill out.
Phoebe: Yeah! What have you got to lose? Yknow you might even end up with someone really special (whispers) if you pick my guy.
Rachel: Oh! So you're driving up to Connecticut?
Chandler: (To Monica) Wow! Listen, we had a good run. What was it? Four? Five months? I mean, that's more than most people have in a lifetime! So, good-bye, take care, bye-bye then! (He kisses her and starts to climb out the balcony window.)
Rachel: Well, why do yknow go in that room (points to the room Ross is in) and do your homework?
Ross: I know. (Rachel bends down to Emma and Ross looks over his shoulder again, afraid)
Rachel: (to Monica and Phoebe) Oh my God, you guys, what am I doing? What am I doing? This is so un-me!
Ross: Yep! I'd like to thank you guys for coming down here to complain about the rain and ruin my career!
(The assistant leaves and Ross goes back in the spray-on tan booth and turns his back to the spray nozzles, facing the back wall)
Rachel: (to Monica)What's going on?
Chandler: Oh, come on, theres a rest stop right up there! Come on, I really have to goooooooooo.
Monica: Alright, who wants to do it?
(She goes down the hall. Joshua goes to put the food away when his parents walk in.)
Ross: (yelling to Monica)They're towing your car, they're towing your car!!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler enters to find Joey lying in the fetus position on the floor.]
JOEY: Na, na I'm ok. Oh and uh, just so you know, I'm not movin' back in 'cause I have to. Well, I mean, I do have to. It's just that that place wasn't really, I mean, this is...
Rachel: Ohhh well. Yknow what honey? The best thing to do to get over a guy is to start dating someone else. Oh! There is this great guy you will love at work named Bob! Hes a real up-and-comer in Human Resources.
Monica: Okay. (She does so and starts to walk towards Joey to receive her pancakes.)
(Joey and Monica rush over to her.)
Monica: (runs over to Phoebe) You have got to go home!
PHOEBE: I know. Oh, like you would drink her coffee after what you did to her with Van Damme.
CHANDLER: Hey, sorry I'm late. Congratulations, Mon. (to Ross) I'm not sorry I'm late. How incredible was my afternoon with Jade?
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler is reading on the couch while Joey, still suffering from his hernia, is returning with coffee for them both. After a series of grunts and groans he manages to painfully walk back from the counter, sit down, and slide Chandler his coffee.]
(He goes into his room to try them on and closes the door.)
Ross: (trying to stop her) Hey, hey!!
Danny: I had to cut my hair to get rid of the uh, fogger smell.
Mr. Geller: Way to go son! I knew youd find him!
Chandler: (to Drew) Oh, by the way, that is her full name.
Nurse: Youve done all you can Dr. Wesley. You have got to let her go.
Phoebe: Well, I bet that was very hard for him to do.
Chandler: Honey, we're leaving tomorrow you've still got a lot of packing to do.
Rachel: (to Ross) Isn't that amazing?
Ross: I'm just, I'm just glad I didn't miss my daughter's first words (goes back to checking the tickets).
Monica: Ohh, he's really shy. I-I dont think he's up to meeting everyone yet.
[Flashback to 610 - TOW The Routine] [Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment, Chandler is there. Phoebe and Rachel enter.]
Rachel: Hello. (to Gavin) But you know what, hey, new day, new leaf, I am just really really happy ... (sees Gavin staring at Heather) I'm sorry, obviously Heather's ass has something more important to say so I'll just wait 'till it's finished.