words in movies
Chandler: Im gonna miss being able to afford food.
Chandler: Yeah well, too bad were gonna have to return them.
Monica: Honey, Im not returning them. Okay? I mean I-I know they cost a lot, but Im going to wear them all the time. Youll see. Besides, I love the compliments. I mean, have you ever had something so beautiful everyone wanted it?
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, Ross, and Rachel are sitting on the couch and Ross is talking to Rachels, who is now showing, stomach.]
Phoebe: How can you let him talk to your crotch like that?
Rachel: (pause) Hes talking to the baby.
Phoebe: Ohh! Okay! Okay, cause when-when he said, "I cant wait to hear your first words," I thought, "Theres a trick."
Rachel: Bye. (She gets up to leave but is stopped by Joey)
Joey: Umm, can you do me a favor? I was talkin to my sister and she knows you work at Ralph Lauren
Rachel: No, forget it! No way! I am not sending anymore Ralph Lauren clothes to prison. It is a waste.
Joey: No-no-no-no-no-no, not her, not her. My youngest sister, Dina, shes really interested in fashion, and she wants to talk to someone successful, yknow, to give her some advice.
Rachel: I guess I can talk to one of my supervisors
Joey: Oh no-no-no-no, she wants to talk to you!
Rachel: Yes! Id love to! Have her come by the office.
(Joey goes to get coffee and Rachel exits as the camera pans to Phoebe and Ross on the couch.)
Phoebe: Hey Ross! Doesnt Ben go to the Smithfield Day School?
Ross: Fine! No more dinosaur stuff! Can I talk about fossils? (Joey is about to sit down and hears this so instead he groans and exits.)
Ross: What are you reading? The Kidnappers Guide to Manhattan Private Schools?
Phoebe: Uh-huh, yeah thats too bad. I really want to go to his concert Friday night, but its totally sold out. I know! Why dont you meet him and get tickets?! If you get two Ill take you.
Phoebe: There you go! Oh, you are so lucky! You might actually get to meet Sting tomorrow! Thats why you have kids!
Chandler: You can wear them with shorts on a street corner and earn the money to pay for them. (Goes and gets some coffee at the counter.)
Monica: The guy who made these hates feet and wants to see them die!
Rachel: Well-well you can give them to me! I havent felt my feet in years!
Chandler: (returning to his seat) Hey!
Ross: I dropped him off at Carols. (To Phoebe) Anyway, it turns out that Im not going to be able to get those tickets though.
Ross: Phoebe, you cant force kids to be friends.
Phoebe: Your kid is seven?! (Ross nods, "Yes.") (To the rest) Hes really small. (To Ross) Please! Please get the tickets!
(Ross runs out to get the tickets.)
[Scene: Rachels Office, Joey has brought Dina to meet with Rachel.]
Rachel: Nice to meet you. (They shake hands.)
Joey: This is so exciting for her. Well, Ill let you two fash ists get down to business. (Exits.)
Rachel: Okay. All right Dina, well lets talk about the different areas of fashion that you could get involved in. Lets see, theres design, but you may need a whole other degree for that. Uh, theres-theres sales, which is great because you get to travel
[Scene: The Hallway, Monica is returning, but before she enters the apartment she stops on the step and changes from wearing tennis shoes to the boots and she moans in pain as she puts each boot on.]
Monica: Honey, we dont really have to go to this thing tonight do we?
Monica: Anyway, I picked up this outfit that I want to wear and the, and the boots dont really go with it.
Monica: Fine! If you want me to wear the boots, Ill wear the boots. In fact, Ill go into my room right now and yknow try the outfit on.
Monica: Okay? (She starts to walk which causes her to start crying) Ooo wee! Christmas party in my boots! (Runs into the bedroom and mixes saying ow with laughing.)
[Scene: The Hallway, Rachel is about to enter her apartment with Dina to tell Joey the news.]
Rachel: Honey, its going to be okay. Hes been incredibly supportive of me, and if he gets a little upset; thats what the meatball sub is for. (She gives Dina a sandwich wrapped in aluminum foil.)
Rachel: Honey, why dont you sit down? Dina has something that she wants to tell you.
Rachel: (To Dina) Now! Give him the sandwich! Give him the sandwich! (She quickly sets the sandwich in front of him.)
Joey: Well obviously this is a mistake! You cant be pregnant! Because you have to have sex to get pregnant!
Dina: Joe, I tried to wait until I was 25 like you did!
Joey: (to Rachel) Bub!!! (Points at her and quiets Rachel.) (To Dina) I cant believe this! Youre the good one! You went to college! Both years! Who did this to you?!
Ben: I have to go. My friend Doug is waiting for me over there. (Goes over to Doug.)
Phoebe: Him youre friends with. (Starts looking at the children trying to find Jack and a teacher notices her.)
Phoebe: I am one of Bens mothers. Im a lesbian. It was, it was difficult coming out to my parents.
The Teacher: Right. Are you looking for Jacks parents to discuss the problems hes having with Ben? (Phoebe nods Yes.) Yeah. Because I really do think the parents should sit down and have a conversation.
Chandler: What honey, its like fifteen blocks to the subway. Lets go.
Monica: Hey! Do you think that we can get to the subway right there if we climb down through the manhole cover?
Chandler: So I was right. This is what it feels like to be right. (Pause) Its oddly unsettling.
Monica: Okay. Wait, just give me a second, I need to just get my boots off first. (She starts taking them off.) Ah Ooh Oohh Ohh Oh God Ohh Oh Ohh Ohhhh
Bobby: Hi Dina. Good to see you.
Joey: Just what needs to be done! Dearly beloved, we are gathered here to join this man and this woman
Joey: Dont interrupt me when Im talkin to God! Now where were we? Oh right, okay. Do you Dina, take this man
Joey: Ahhh! I heard "I do", were halfway there! Okay! (To Bobby) You!
Joey: Well what am I supposed to do?
Rachel: Youre supposed to realize that they are adults! And that they can make their own decisions.
Joey: No they cant! They were stupid enough to get knocked up!
Rachel: Heyyyyy! Contraceptives are not always effective! (To Bobby and Dina) Right?
[Scene: Stings Apartment, Phoebe has come to talk about Jack and is waiting for Stings wife, Trudie Styler, to enter.]
Phoebe: Wow! This place is incredible! (Gasps) Stings pen that he gave to Phoebe. (Puts the pen in her purse and goes over to a floor-to-ceiling bookcase) Come on! Secret passageway! (Starts pulling books at random as Trudie enters.)
Trudie Styler: Im told there are two sides to this story, but all Ive heard is that Bens a bit of a poo-poo head.
Phoebe: Unless! Unless umm, okay I-I would be willing to go to the concert, umm, all the while thinking about the children of course.
Trudie Styler: Im not giving concert tickets to someone whod use their son like this!
Chandler: Okay, ten blocks down. Five to go.
Monica: Okay, Im never gonna wear them again. I just didnt get a chance to say goodbye.
Chandler: Yknow what? You can say goodbye to the tan ones.
Chandler: Okay. (Moves closer to the window.)
Monica: (to the boots) Bye bootsWait! Half off?! (Chandler runs off.)
Rachel: Joey, just because theyre not getting married doesnt mean this is going to be a disaster. Maybe they have a plan!
Joey: (to Dina) You were right. He is funny.
Rachel: Hey, now wait a minute! I get when you told people at first that you wanted to be an actor they laughed at you! Now come on Bobby, why dont you tell us a little bit about your band?
Rachel: (To Dina) Really? (Nods her head at Bobby.)
Joey: Dina, if youre having a baby you should be married! Even if it is to Bobby! (Bobby gets happy.) Dude, thats not a compliment!
Joey: One pregnant woman at a time, please! I just want you to be okay.
Rachel: So forcing her to marry Bobby is gonna make that happen?
Joey: Maybe! (To Bobby) Well! Well so-so uh, what kind of music does Numb NutsOh forget it! I cant!
Dina: Joey, I am scared to death about this. But I really think I can do it, Im just gonna need some help. And Bobbys gonna be here the whole time.
Bobby: You bet I am! (To Joey) And to answer your earlier question, were straight-up gangster rap. (Joey shakes his head as if hes about to lose it.)
Dina: And youre my big brother! I mean, youre my favorite guy in the whole world. Im not even scared to tell mom and dad. I was scared of telling you.
Dina: Joey, I cant stand the thought of having this baby with you mad at me. I want him to have his uncle. Is my baby gonna have his Uncle Joey?
Joey: Come here! (Hugs Dina and Bobby looks to hug Rachel.)
Monica: Well that's it. People never say `We need to talk' unless it's something bad.
(Another little girl walks over to him.)
Chandler: See Joe, we want you to tell stories but yknow, romantic stories. Nice stories.
Ross: No no, about a month ago she gave her number to some guy in a bar.
Phoebe: (To Joey) You ate meat! (Joey is shocked) (To Chandler and Monica) You had sex! (Theyre shocked.)
Ross: Okay! (She leaves.) (To Chandler and Joey.) Hey!
Monica: Yeah, ah, but Pheebs dont you think hes a little young to get married?
Ross: Please, he refers to me as wethead.
Joey: (comforting her) And hey, you need anything, you can always come to Joey. Me and Chandler live across the hall. And he's away a lot.
Chandler: All of a sudden, the phone starts to ring. Now I don't know what to do, everybody starts looking at me.
Pete: Dont worry, Hoshi taught me how to use an opponents strength and weight against him.
Phoebe: (to Rachel) What's the matter? Why so scrunchy?
Phoebe: Umm, okay, okay, look. I took this picture from your fridge. Okay, because I know that this is my Father. Yeah, this is Frank Buffay and you are standing right there next to him. Now, look I deserve to know where I came from. All right? So if you can help me find my Father then you should! Otherwise, youre just mean! (pause) So, just tell me the truth!
C.H.E.E.S.E: Oh yeah? Well then how come I cant get my VCR to stop blinking 12:00?
Chandler: Oh my God, honey we are so meant to be together. We both have copies of the Annie soundtrack.
Chandler: (picks it up) And now Ive picked it up again. (walks over to Monica.)
Ross: No-no, I-I have to see if this apartment became available.
Rachel: I cant talk to you. I cant even look at you right now!
Woman: What do you mean? Yesterday you said I was too pretty to pay for stuff!
Chandler: I dont know, but dont worry, dont worry, because I know how to take a picture now. (They get ready) Okay, see? Look down (Looks down), look down, look down (He falls asleep.)
Joey: Say hello to Reverend Joey Tribbiani! (Holds up the piece of paper bearing the proof of his ordination.)
(Phoebe wants to be angry with Joey, but as she watches him shaking his head in pain and disbelief, she knows that it isn't his fault.)
Joey: I got it from Monica. She sold it to me for a very reasonable price.
Joey: No, no! Don't try to turn this around on me, ok? I'm not some kind of... social work, ok, that you can just... do.
Ross: (To Joey) So, thanks so much for bringing her to the hospital.
Ross: Yes, I suppose I am a dog. But Issac, see I-I happen to have a girlfriend.
Margha: Im now thinking I would like to change my answer to, no one.
Joey: (singing) "Happy birthday to you!"
Monica: Well, I'm sorry, but Chandler and I could really use a weekend away. You know, to reconnect... emotionally.
Chandler: Well, y'know, you and me, it had to end sometime.
(Chandler picks up the timer being used and turns it to zero at which it chimes.)
(Rachel gets fed up and heads over to another smoker.)
Rachel: (to them) Just a minute!!! (She takes the candy and opens the door to two parents, a witch, a clown, and a cowgirl.) Look at you guys! Wow! You are a very scary witch. (Gives her candy.)
To Be Continued
Phoebe: So hes probably really nervous around women, y'know? Maybe, you just have to make the first move.
[Scene: The Porsche, Joey is finishing up washing the car and is talking to a guy about the car.]
Chandler: So explain something to me here, uh, what kind of a relationship do you imagine us having if you already have a husband and a boyfriend?
Joey: (on tape) Okay, so say hi to my friend and tell him that you like the hat.
[Scene: A bar.� Rachel and Phoebe are bringing their drinks from the bar to a sofa.]
Rachel: I can't watch. It's like firing Elmo. (Ross walks to the couch where Sandy sits)
[Cut to Rachel listening to a phone conversation between Chandler and Monica in The One With All the Resolutions.]
Monica: Well, if you really think about it, I mean four days is not that long. I mean, I see you Monday before you go to work, and I see you Thursday when you get back, and I always work late on Tuesdays, so really if you think about it, it's really just one day. And well, if we can't make it one day, we've got real problems my friend.
Joey: (To Chandler) Hey man, you feeling any better? (Chandler answers him with some guttural sounds that only he can make and that no human can transcribe.)
Monica: Chandler! (Joey and his grandmother shush them and wave them away, which they do.) Okay, let me get this straight, it's okay for you to flirt, but not for me.
RACHEL: Look you guys, I have to go, I'm the Maid-of-Honor. And besides you know what I just need to be in a room again with these people and feel good about myself.
Chandler: Oh they didnt want to come!
Phoebe: Ooh, oh, I've gotta go. (raises) Whoa, oh, head rush. One more, and then I have to go. (sits down, and then raises again) Cool!
Ross: Nooo!! Gandolf?! Gandolf is coming to town?
Emily: Id really rather talk to him.
Monica: This would be a beautiful place to get married, yeah, but I wouldnt put the aisle there and I would never have the ceremony there! (Points to both places.) I mean youd have the ceremony under this big beautiful arch. (The arch at the entrance to the room.)
Rachel: (calling from the bathroom) All right, whos turn is it to help me get up!
Jill: Hey! You have no right to tell me what to do.
Rachel: Well when I talk to her I almost feel like she understands what I'm saying.
Monica: Okay, you stay here, and just wait by the phone. Spray Lysol in my shoe, and wait for Ross to kill you.
Phoebe: (sarcastically) Okay Ross! (Ross exits and she says quietly to the bike) Please dont die!
Rachel: Hey, can I borrow the key to your house so I can run across the street and make a copy?
Chandler: Thats a great idea! We can easily think of a way for us both to enjoy the room.
(Ross continues to talk to her as the camera pans to show Rachel standing in the doorway.)
Phoebe: Yeah. Well, uhm... listen he was supposed to get a weekend furlough, so he'd come to the wedding tomorrow, but he just called and... uhm... well, apparently stabbing Iceman in the exercise yard just couldn't wait till Monday.
Joey: Whoa-whoa-whoa. What ah, what happened to playing the field?
Chandler: Theres no back to this couch!
Chandler: Eh, forget about the future and stuff! So we only have two kids, yknow? Well pick our favorite and that one will get to go to college.
Chandler: All right, kids, I gotta get to work. If I don't input those numbers,... it doesn't make much of a difference...
Ross: What can I say, you missed your chance. From now on the only person whos going to enjoy these bad boys (holds up his hands) is me. (Quickly realizes what he said and exits disgustedly.)
Rachel: Hi! I just want to apologize. Im really sorry I was a baby.
Jill: Oh, Mr. Scientist has to get all technical!
(Both Chandler and Ross are eager to hear her decision.)
(She picks up a charred piece of plastic that once was the Foster puppets, and starts to break down. Monica goes over and comforts her.)
PHOEBE: Joey, why don't you talk to Chandler about moving back?
Monica: (entering, to Joey and Rachel) Hey, did you guys know, that your oven doesn't work?
Chandler: Look Joe, I know you wanted to do the wedding
Monica: Yknow youre really not supposed to be back here!
Ross: Well, he said there's definitely nothing to worry about, it's totally benign.
Phoebe: (sitting down next to Ross) Yknow she has a face Ross!
Ross: Why? Why cant you go to him?
Phoebe: I mean... (David kisses Phoebe on the cheek, makes his way to the door and turns around again)
Joey: Oh, now I have to go!!
[cut to later, Rosss team has the ball.]
Ross: (To Rachel) You uh, you may have been right about Jill.
[Flashback to 410 - TOW The Girl From Poughkeepsie] [Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is singing her holiday song.]
Ross: Okay, Joey, you know what? You have to go for it. How often does this happen to you, huh? You owe it to yourself. (Walks towards the door until )
Joey: (sarcastic) Oh no this is devastating! My faith is shaken. Im so glad I have the new chair to get my through this difficult time in my life.
Rachel: Oh er... well you know Emma started crawling? I realised that this place, is very unsafe for a baby. So I went to the store and got some stuff to baby-proof the apartment.
Joey: (To Ross) What is the matter with you?!
Chandler: Huh! So that's what I would look like if I worked out... and was being serviced by a policeman. You're not actually going to send these out are ya?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is trying to comfort Chandler. Joey is absent.]
Rachel: Okay look, let me paint you a little picture. (She sits down next to him.) All right, you are settin sail up the Hudson! Youve got the wind in your h(sees that hes bald)arms! You-you get all that peace and quiet that youve always wanted! You get back to nature! You can go fishin! You canooh, you can get one of those little hats and have people call you captain, and then when youre old, Cappy.
Phoebe: Okay. Then, take the tiara back and let me hold the musket again. (He hands it to her and Phoebe poses in front of one of those small mirrors.) Somethings missing. Its not Okay oh, let me see the ring my friend picked out.
PHOEBE: Ooh, this is it, 74. [screeches to a halt, Joey and Chandler are thrown into the plexiglass wall in the cab]
Chandler: Ok, Janice. Janice. Hey, Janice. Look, there's no way for me to tell you this. At least there's no new way for me to tell you this. I just don't things are gonna work out.
Ross: Come on! (They start to leave.)
Mrs. Green: Oh my look at that. Only three weeks to go, now have you picked your nanny yet? Now I dont want you to use your housekeeper cause it would just split her focus.
Chandler: That's not specific to girls.
Pete: Its time for me to conquer the physical world.
RACH: Thank you. OK. [dials] [to Michael] Machine. Just waiting for the beep.
Chandler: Well, I was kinda hoping we could do this without him. (She starts to take off her latex gloves.) Oh no-no-no, leave the gloves on.
Rachel: Me either. Umm, all right, first thing I need you to do is go downstairs and find a women named Hilda and tell her to go home.
Ross: And, and uh, you-you remember my friend Chandler. (Points to him.)
Kristin: Well, um, for the past few years I've been working..(Ross is watching Carol and Susan, not listening to Kristin. Susan gets up, and has to go. Carol is left stranded)...which is funny because, that wasn't even my major.
Joey: I mean, the jobs easy and the moneys good, you know? I guess Im going to be hanging out here anyway. I might as well get paid for it, right? I just feel kind of weird serving you guys.