words in movies
Rachel: (to Ross) Tell him.
Ross: (to Chandler) It's her first day at this new job. Your not supposed to start with her!
Chandler: I need you to come to this bachelor party for my weird cousin Albert, y'know he's the botanist.
Chandler: (to Phoebe) It must take you forever to find your keys.
Ross: Honey, just relax, it's gonna be fine. Hey, umm,. why don't I come down there and I'll take you out to lunch?
Rachel: Yeah, it's kinda like a 'good luck on your first day' sort of thing. (to Phoebe) Is this actually a lunchbox?
Chandler: (to Ross) Hey, so can you make it on Friday?
Ross: What? Oh yeah, yeah I think so. Why am I invited to this again?
Ross: She's having lunch with him. She's having lunch with him. And you should of seen the hug she gave him when she got the job. And, and, and, (to Joey) he's really good looking. (Joey gives an enthusiastic thumbs up) What am I gonna do?
Chandler: Don't do anything. Keep it inside. Learn how to hide your feelings! (pause) Don't cry outloud.
Chandler: I want to say you but, that seems like such an easy answer.
Ross: Ah Joey, I don't think you get to pick the cities.
Ross: Mr. Dickens gets to pick 'em.
Joey: Oh, okay. (to Ross) The what?
Rachel: I think I just shipped 3,000 bras to personnel. Oh honey, I gotta go. (to Mark) Mark, I need you!
Ross: Oh, oh, I'm, I'm, I'm sorry sweetie, I was just trying to ah, I'm dialing another number. (hangs up)
[Scene: The Moondance diner, Monica is cleaning up with one of the waiters, with her back turned to him she removes her fake breasts and hides them under her wig.]
Jeannine: (to Monica) All right, I just got changed in thirty seconds so you can be alone with him. You'd better go for it.
Julio: (to Jeannine) Adios.
Julio: Things that move me. The, the shadow of a tree, a child laughing, or this lip. (points to her lip)
Monica: Mine? (points to her lower lip) Right here?
Joey: (singing) You've got to pick a pocket or two. Boyyyyssss, (picks a handkerchief from the pianist's pocket) you've got to pick a pocket or two..........
Director: Listen Joey, we definitely want to see you for the callback on Saturday.
Director: Okay, and listen don't forget to bring your jazz shoes for the dance audition.
Director: Joey, all the roles got to dance a little. But believe me with your dance background it'll be a piece of cake.
Joey: Yeah, I can dance, y'know. (starts to dance really, really, really badly)
Chandler: All right, I have to get that, but no-no. (answering phone) Hello? (listens) (happily) Hi! Yeah listen, I'm, I'm in need of a stripper and I was told that you do that. (listens) Let me ask you this, what, what do you do for the extra hundred? (listens) So would I, would I have to provide the grapes?
Monica: It was soo amazing, he is so sexy, and smart, which makes him even sexier. Oh gosh, I gotta so you this. Last night, we were fooling around and he stops to write a poem.
Joey: Well sure, you name a kid that, what do you expect them to grow up to be?
Monica: Anyway um, when he left he forgot to take the poem with him. Now, I am like totally dense about poetry, but I think it's pretty good all right. Check it out. (hands them the poem)
Chandler: To yourself. (finishing) Hey-hey-hey, y'know what that's pretty good.
Monica: Oh, I'm so glad you guys like it. Yay! All right I gotta go to work. (tries to take the poem)
Monica: All right, just give it back to me when your done. See you guys.
Rachel: Oh, yeah, sure, it's umm... (she picks up this bug and it starts to play the theme from Love Story)
Mark: Wow! Somebody wants people to know you have a boyfriend.
Man: (to Rachel) Ah, excuse me, are you Rachel Green?
Quartet: (singing) And you know who will be there to support... you?! Your one and only boyfriend...
The Bass Barber: It's nice to have a boyfriend.
Ross: ...can't, can't a guy send a barbershop quartet to his girlfriend's office anymorrrrre!!
Rachel: Look, I know what's going on here, okay, Mark explained it all to me. He said this is what you guys do.
Chandler: Look, don't you see what's happening here. Instead of hitting on her right away, he's becoming her confidant. Now he's gonna be the guy she goes too to complain about you.
Ross: What am I going to do?
Chandler: Well, why don't you send her a musical bug, op, no you already did that. All right look, you're going to have to go there yourself now, okay, make a few surprise visits.
Chandler: All right fine, don't do anything, just sit here and talk to us, meanwhile she is talking to him about you. And he's being Mr. Joe Sensitive, and she starts thinking 'Maybe this is the guy for me, because he understands me.'
Woman: (walking up to Mark) Here's the Shelly Siegal stuff from December.
Rachel: Ohhh! That is soo sweet! (gets up to get herself a cup of coffee)
(They start to kiss, and Ross rushes into the office to break it up.)
Ross: I have been down in your store for twenty minutes trying to get a tie! What do I have to do to get some service?! (turns to Rachel) Hi Rach. (He's puts his hand on her shoulder and she knocks it away.)
Director: Listen Joey, seeing as you've got the most experience, I want you to take these dancers and show them the combination.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is tying a ribbon to a vase.]
Monica: (to Julio) So! I'm just an empty vase, huh?
Monica: Y'know, so I don't read as many important books as you do, and I don't write trick poems that seem to be about one thing but are actually about something else. And y'know what, I get excited about stupid stuff, like when I my People magazine comes on Saturday, and the new Hold Everything catalog. Y'know but that does not mean that I'm empty, I care about things. I care about my friends and family. You have no right to make that kind of judgment about me.
[Scene: Joey's audition, the director has returned and wants to see the combination.]
Director: Let's try it again, and this time let's watch everybody watch Joey. (to Joey) Show 'em how it's done. (to the pianist) Count it off.
(The pianist starts to play, and Joey readies himself, and then runs out of the audition.)
Ross: (sits down next to her) I'm sorry, I was an idiot.
Ross: A big idiot. Just you have to realize is, this whole Mark thing is kinda hard for me.
Ross: Well, I was with Carol for like eight years and I lost her. And now if it's possible I think I love you even more. So, it's hard for me to believe that I'm not gonna, well that someone else is not going to take you away.
Rachel: Honey, that's very sweet, it just seems to me though, that if two people love each other and trust each other, like we do, there's no reason to be jealous. (she kisses him)
Ross: Oh, I've got to go pick up Ben, we've got a play date this afternoon.
Ross: Ah, yeah, yeah. Umm, we started talking after she y'know, did her thing. And it turns out she's got a boy about Ben's age, so we're taking them to a gym-boree class. Why, is that okay?
Rachel: Noo, I y'know I don't see why she has to play with you, that's all. I mean doesn't she have any y'know other stripper moms friends of her own?
Rachel: (to Chandler) Well, there's a kiss that he won't forget for a couple of hours, y'know.
Chandler: Yeah. Either that, or you just turned him on and sent him off to a stripper.
Julio: (to him) I am Julio.
Quartet: Your no God's gift to women, that's all in your headdddd. You are just a buttmunch.
Phoebe: Okay, so I totally took care of the babies all by myself! I fed em, bathed em, and put em to bed.
Frank: Come on little Chandler, it's time to be born. Come on little Chandler! Come on!
Phoebe: Oh, Ross, Mon, is it okay if I bring someone to your parents anniversary party?
RTST: Yeah, well, anyhoo, here is your check. [hands it to her] Thank you for all the trouble you went through. Um, listen, you didn't eat a lot of it while you were cooking, did you?
Monica: We're Aunt Monica and uncle Chandler, by the way. You may not recognize us, because we haven't spoken to your parents in seventeen years!
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Thank you Rachel but, look at Monica!
(they all jump up excitedly and try to see the ticket)
Ross: Hey, I'm not one to kiss and tell, but I'm also not one to have sex and shut up. We totally did it!
Joey: No-no, I cant! I cant! Not after the other night, its just its too weird, okay? Dont tell her Im here! (Turns to run to the bathroom and his bagel falls off the plate onto the floor.) Dont eat that! (Runs to the bathroom as Rachel enters.)
Rachel: Oh, maybe that's Emily calling back to leave the exact same message.
[Scene: Central Park, Ross is teaching Phoebe how to ride her bike.]
Mr. Geller: Son, I had to shave my ears for tonight. You can do this.
Monica: I'm not going to be a part of this! You can't just bring some random guy at home and expect him to be our sperm donor!
Charlie: Nice to meet you.
Ross: (to Joey) Oh my God!
RYAN: Phoebe, I have spent the last eight months in a steel tube with men, thinking about this moment. I am not gonna let a bunch of itchy spots stand between us. [He walks to her and kisses her.]
Ross: Hey, if thats what you want to do Im not gonna say no.
Joey: Yeah!Hey, you just have to promise not to get yourself thrown out again.
Rachel: What? Oh my God! To who?
PHOEBE: It's not a blue screen... it's just, maybe it was just really clear that day. OK, I have to talk to my grandmother. [turns to leave]
Phoebe: If I havent said it before: shes a lucky, lucky lady! So, where are you going towhat the mother of crap is up with this stuff? (Referring to the taffy, which shes been chewing this whole time.) Oh, God. Is it gum, is it food? Whats the deal? (she swallows it, finally) Oh, its nice! May I try a pink one?
Rachel: Thank you doctor. (Dr. Long exits.) (To Joey) Oh thank you for being so nice and calm.
JOEY: Well, it was a fight. . . based on serious stuff, remember. About how I never lived alone or anything. I just think it would be good for me, ya know, help me to grow or. . . whatever.
Phoebe: No, I know, I know, that this is Franks life, (walks behind them, they turn around in the leather chairs to face her) y'know. Y'know, I dont want to be all judgmental, y'know, but this is sick, its sick and wrong!
Phoebe: Oh, it’s the worst way to propose!
[Scene: Bloomingdales, Rachels new job, she is waiting for Joshua and practising how to ask him out.]
RACHEL: Ross, Ross, please listen to me. Ross, you are so much better for me than Paolo ever was. I mean you care about me, you're loving, you make me laugh.
Monica: Okay, guys, listen, don't forget that tomorrow is the day that Emily gets married again, so whatever we do, just try to really keep Ross's mind off of it.
Malcom: (reading) I met Phoebe today. She was really nice to me eventhough I'm such a loser. And, then when I was walking home I thought about her a lot, it was weird, but kinda cool.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment, Joey is entering to find Chandler waiting patiently for him.]
Richards Date: Well, I just wanted to see where you lived. Now, give me the tour.
Rachel: This is a very critical time right now. If you feel yourself reaching for that phone, then you go shoe shopping, you get your butt in a bubble bath. You want her back you have to start acting aloof.
Chandler: You know how to use a compass?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica is standing in the kitchen ready to leave for the rehearsal dinner.]
Rachel: So that there will be a decent place for me to sit.
Monica: Because! You could get to live out my fantasy!
Phoebe: But, I mean, do you think hes gonna enjoy it when hes up to his elbows in the diapers from all the babies they have to have right away?! This is not fair to Frank, (she walks behind them again, and hey again turn to follow her) and it-its not fair to the babies, and y'know what, its not good home economics.
Joey: Fine, I'll rent a car and drive...! Ross, you have to get that job!
Chandler: I asked myself that very question, sir. Uh, (Points to Monica) this is Monica. (Points to his boss.) This is my boss, Doug. Doug this is Monica.
Emily: Ross, are you there? Ross, I dont know if you can hear this but (Ross has moved to the window, apparently so that he can hear better.) Im gonna talk anyway, uh, Im in the States with you sister and your friends and its all over with Colin. I came here to tell you that, and to tell youYes, Joey you can have all the chocolate you want, just take it! Uh, I came here to tell you that I love you.
Mike: Like an X-Ray. Bad day not to wear a bra.
CHANDLER:Well the package says you have to uh, constantly keep it moving. Stir and drink, stir and drink, never let it settle.
Joey: (in a funny voice) Yeah, so it turns out that it wasnt the hair straightener that started the fire. (Rachel prompts him on what to say next.) No-no, it was the candles. Its very not good leaving candles unattended. In fact, one of the first things they teach you in fire school is (Phoebe suddenly enters.) Uhh Uhh Okay. Well, I have to go now. (Phoebe leaves.)
[Cut to the city street. Monica and Chandler are jogging. Chandler is lagging behind so he hops in a cab and takes off, leaving Monica behind]
Monica: Uh, Chandler did! What does he want you to give up? Phoebe: A bunch of stuff. And the worst one... he wants me to get rid of Gladys.
Monica: (visibly upset) She picked Rachel. I mean, she tried to back out of it, but it was obvious. She picked Rachel.
Monica: Hey, have you figured out a way to tell him youre moving out?
Chandler: You know, I don't mean to brag, but I waited tables at Innsbruck in '76. (dead silence) Amouz-bouche? (holds out tray)
Tag: Oh yeah! We went to the Knicks game.
RACHEL: Hi. [Ross turns to Rachel and they hug]
Mike: Going go to the bathroom.
Rachel: I-I dont want your job. I-I dont. Ohh this is such a mistake. I did not make out with him. Nobody made out with him. I did not use my keycard yesterday. I dont even know how to use my keycard. (The elevator stops. Ralph steps on.)
(The ladder retracts, taking Joey up into the spaceship for his voyage to Blargon 7.)
[Scene: That same plane cabin, Ross is working on a crossword puzzle and Rachel is asleep against his shoulder. She shifts a little bit and Ross suddenly gets an idea. An evil idea when he looks at his pen. Then we have a little time lapse, the plane has landed and everyone is disembarking. The flight attendant is saying bye-bye to everyone.]
(Three paleontologists walk by and Ross hugs Charlie trying not to be seen)
Monica: Please? Please?! We just don't want to deal with telling everyone, okay? Just promise you won't tell.
Chandler: Come on, you're going to Bloomingdale's with Julie? That's like cheating on Rachel in her house of worship.
Jamie: This could be Gods way of telling us to eat at home.
Monica: Easy Rach, we'll find it. (To all) Won't we!
Monica: Now another way to organise your stuffed animals, is by size.
Chandler: (to Mon) So, Zack's pretty nice, uh?
Rachel: And youre still not attracted to him at all?
Phoebe: Thank you! (to Rachel) Oh, and I have something for you!
Chandler: I thought I had to make the jokes!
Chandler: (entering with Joey) (to Monica) Coffee house?
Ross: (to Charlie) Hey!
Amy: Ella wanted to go out, so we went shopping and got some sushi.
JOEY: Thanks.� (Joey and Chandler exit to the hall.� Joey pulls out the tickets and hands one to Chandler.)� Here's your ticket.
Mrs. Tribbiani: Do you remember how your father used to be? Always yelling, always yelling nothing made him happy, nothing made him happy, not that wood shop, not those stupid little ships in the bottle, nothing. Now he's happy! I mean, it's nice, he has a hobby.
[Cut back to the cast and Conan.]
Chandler: So if you want people to see them, then by definition you're not having them taken out... say, at the break of dawn?
Rachel: No honey, it's okay! Listen, I'll got to Ross's and get the blender, you get all the margarita stuff ready.
Monica: Hey, you wanna go to see a movie?
Phoebe: (to the squirrel) Okay, stop tormenting me! This mink! Okay, they're mean! And they hate squirrels! And y'know, okay, most of these probably wanted to be coats! (The squirrel stares at her.) All right, fine, now I get it. (To the clerk.) Here. (She hands him her coat.) You take it. (To the squirrel.) Are you happy now? I'm cold!
Dr. Long: Ten centimeters, youre about to become a mom.
Chandler: (To Monica) Turns out he is kinda funny.
Chandler: Oh, so thats why the priest threw holy water on me. (theres no reaction from Joey) Okay, listen, you have to cheer up! Okay? You should come out with Ross and me, I mean anything is better than sitting around here crying all day about Kate.
Joey: (he thinks a little, considering the option and seems to be quite satisfied) I like that! A sharing buffer! Yeah! I’ll order some extra fries! Maybe a plate of onion rings. Yeah. And a shrimp cocktail. And some buffalo wings. Maybe an individual pizza, uh? And some mozzarella sticks. (he looks absorbed in his food thoughts) What were we talking about?
Ross: Sure, Monica would have to give her up.
Benjamin: So good to see you.
Joey: Chandler? Forty-five minutes? Well, something is not right. I just can’t believe he would do this to Monica!
Monica: Just go get some! (Kisses him.) Go! (She runs to hide in the bathroom.)
Chandler: Are you asking permission to break the pact?
Benjamin (to Ross): You weren't there!
Benjamin: Oh, well, likewise. Actually, not likewise. I've never heard of you until this morning, but, it's nice to be nice!
Chandler: And we just sit here. I mean if I die the only way people would even know I was here, would be by the ass print on this chair! Look, we have to do something. Okay? Something huge!
Ross: See, Rach, uh, see, I don't think that swearing off guys altogether is the answer. I really don't. I think that what you need is to develop a more sophisticated screening process.
Chandler: No. But uh, Joey has, and I usually talk to them in the morning time.
Rachel: Well, yknow what? Actually, I was about to bid on this lovely trip to Paris.
Monica: But I want to.
Amanda: (To Phoebe) Smell my neck! (Phoebe does so) It's not perfume! It's me! It's my natural scent!
Rachel: But I don't want you to.
Rachel: Aaah... Ross, actually there's something that I really need to talk to you about.
Ross: I dont know. I mean I-I guess I could. Its just that we didnt really end things such good terms. And if I go over there Id be ignoring the one thing she asked me to do when we broke up, jump up my own ass and die. (Walks away.)
Monica: (to chandler) Twenty bucks says they're married within the month.
Chandler: (now yelling) (pretending to look shocked) I did!
Donny: Now Gene I must remind you, you need all six of these to stay in the game, all right? Describe for Joey things you find in your refrigerator.
(Hearing her brother's voice, Monica gets up to stand behind Chandler, followed by Rachel.)
(Joey walks up to Cecilia Monroe who plays Jessica.)
Joey: Oh comelook, when I was a kid my dads company gave season tickets to the number one salesman every year, all right? My dad never won! Of course, he wasnt in the sales division, but still, I never ever, ever forgot that!