words in movies
Rachel: (to Ross) Tell him.
Ross: (to Chandler) It's her first day at this new job. Your not supposed to start with her!
Chandler: I need you to come to this bachelor party for my weird cousin Albert, y'know he's the botanist.
Chandler: (to Phoebe) It must take you forever to find your keys.
Ross: Honey, just relax, it's gonna be fine. Hey, umm,. why don't I come down there and I'll take you out to lunch?
Rachel: Yeah, it's kinda like a 'good luck on your first day' sort of thing. (to Phoebe) Is this actually a lunchbox?
Chandler: (to Ross) Hey, so can you make it on Friday?
Ross: What? Oh yeah, yeah I think so. Why am I invited to this again?
Ross: She's having lunch with him. She's having lunch with him. And you should of seen the hug she gave him when she got the job. And, and, and, (to Joey) he's really good looking. (Joey gives an enthusiastic thumbs up) What am I gonna do?
Chandler: Don't do anything. Keep it inside. Learn how to hide your feelings! (pause) Don't cry outloud.
Chandler: I want to say you but, that seems like such an easy answer.
Ross: Ah Joey, I don't think you get to pick the cities.
Ross: Mr. Dickens gets to pick 'em.
Joey: Oh, okay. (to Ross) The what?
Rachel: I think I just shipped 3,000 bras to personnel. Oh honey, I gotta go. (to Mark) Mark, I need you!
Ross: Oh, oh, I'm, I'm, I'm sorry sweetie, I was just trying to ah, I'm dialing another number. (hangs up)
[Scene: The Moondance diner, Monica is cleaning up with one of the waiters, with her back turned to him she removes her fake breasts and hides them under her wig.]
Jeannine: (to Monica) All right, I just got changed in thirty seconds so you can be alone with him. You'd better go for it.
Julio: (to Jeannine) Adios.
Julio: Things that move me. The, the shadow of a tree, a child laughing, or this lip. (points to her lip)
Monica: Mine? (points to her lower lip) Right here?
Joey: (singing) You've got to pick a pocket or two. Boyyyyssss, (picks a handkerchief from the pianist's pocket) you've got to pick a pocket or two..........
Director: Listen Joey, we definitely want to see you for the callback on Saturday.
Director: Okay, and listen don't forget to bring your jazz shoes for the dance audition.
Director: Joey, all the roles got to dance a little. But believe me with your dance background it'll be a piece of cake.
Joey: Yeah, I can dance, y'know. (starts to dance really, really, really badly)
Chandler: All right, I have to get that, but no-no. (answering phone) Hello? (listens) (happily) Hi! Yeah listen, I'm, I'm in need of a stripper and I was told that you do that. (listens) Let me ask you this, what, what do you do for the extra hundred? (listens) So would I, would I have to provide the grapes?
Monica: It was soo amazing, he is so sexy, and smart, which makes him even sexier. Oh gosh, I gotta so you this. Last night, we were fooling around and he stops to write a poem.
Joey: Well sure, you name a kid that, what do you expect them to grow up to be?
Monica: Anyway um, when he left he forgot to take the poem with him. Now, I am like totally dense about poetry, but I think it's pretty good all right. Check it out. (hands them the poem)
Chandler: To yourself. (finishing) Hey-hey-hey, y'know what that's pretty good.
Monica: Oh, I'm so glad you guys like it. Yay! All right I gotta go to work. (tries to take the poem)
Monica: All right, just give it back to me when your done. See you guys.
Rachel: Oh, yeah, sure, it's umm... (she picks up this bug and it starts to play the theme from Love Story)
Mark: Wow! Somebody wants people to know you have a boyfriend.
Man: (to Rachel) Ah, excuse me, are you Rachel Green?
Quartet: (singing) And you know who will be there to support... you?! Your one and only boyfriend...
The Bass Barber: It's nice to have a boyfriend.
Ross: ...can't, can't a guy send a barbershop quartet to his girlfriend's office anymorrrrre!!
Rachel: Look, I know what's going on here, okay, Mark explained it all to me. He said this is what you guys do.
Chandler: Look, don't you see what's happening here. Instead of hitting on her right away, he's becoming her confidant. Now he's gonna be the guy she goes too to complain about you.
Ross: What am I going to do?
Chandler: Well, why don't you send her a musical bug, op, no you already did that. All right look, you're going to have to go there yourself now, okay, make a few surprise visits.
Chandler: All right fine, don't do anything, just sit here and talk to us, meanwhile she is talking to him about you. And he's being Mr. Joe Sensitive, and she starts thinking 'Maybe this is the guy for me, because he understands me.'
Woman: (walking up to Mark) Here's the Shelly Siegal stuff from December.
Rachel: Ohhh! That is soo sweet! (gets up to get herself a cup of coffee)
(They start to kiss, and Ross rushes into the office to break it up.)
Ross: I have been down in your store for twenty minutes trying to get a tie! What do I have to do to get some service?! (turns to Rachel) Hi Rach. (He's puts his hand on her shoulder and she knocks it away.)
Director: Listen Joey, seeing as you've got the most experience, I want you to take these dancers and show them the combination.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is tying a ribbon to a vase.]
Monica: (to Julio) So! I'm just an empty vase, huh?
Monica: Y'know, so I don't read as many important books as you do, and I don't write trick poems that seem to be about one thing but are actually about something else. And y'know what, I get excited about stupid stuff, like when I my People magazine comes on Saturday, and the new Hold Everything catalog. Y'know but that does not mean that I'm empty, I care about things. I care about my friends and family. You have no right to make that kind of judgment about me.
[Scene: Joey's audition, the director has returned and wants to see the combination.]
Director: Let's try it again, and this time let's watch everybody watch Joey. (to Joey) Show 'em how it's done. (to the pianist) Count it off.
(The pianist starts to play, and Joey readies himself, and then runs out of the audition.)
Ross: (sits down next to her) I'm sorry, I was an idiot.
Ross: A big idiot. Just you have to realize is, this whole Mark thing is kinda hard for me.
Ross: Well, I was with Carol for like eight years and I lost her. And now if it's possible I think I love you even more. So, it's hard for me to believe that I'm not gonna, well that someone else is not going to take you away.
Rachel: Honey, that's very sweet, it just seems to me though, that if two people love each other and trust each other, like we do, there's no reason to be jealous. (she kisses him)
Ross: Oh, I've got to go pick up Ben, we've got a play date this afternoon.
Ross: Ah, yeah, yeah. Umm, we started talking after she y'know, did her thing. And it turns out she's got a boy about Ben's age, so we're taking them to a gym-boree class. Why, is that okay?
Rachel: Noo, I y'know I don't see why she has to play with you, that's all. I mean doesn't she have any y'know other stripper moms friends of her own?
Rachel: (to Chandler) Well, there's a kiss that he won't forget for a couple of hours, y'know.
Chandler: Yeah. Either that, or you just turned him on and sent him off to a stripper.
Julio: (to him) I am Julio.
Quartet: Your no God's gift to women, that's all in your headdddd. You are just a buttmunch.
Monica: Chandler come on. We have to hem the new dust ruffle.
Phoebe: Yes. Once. Yeah, a little. He kinda did it to himself. It's not really a good story.
Rachel: Okay uh, but before you do that. I-I, I need you to talk to me.
Phoebe: (sees Ross) Oh Ross no. Be careful, that is very old! Okay? Early Colonial bird merchants used to bring their birds to market in that.
Rachel: Oh not bad. Do you know that feeling when youre trying to blow a Saint Bernard out your ass?
Joey: Thank you! Well, I guess now I know who Im taking to the awards. (Points to Rachel.)
Rachel: I know, I lied! I didnt want her to think I was a terrible mother! I cant even see my own baby!
MONICA: Ok, Mr. Heckles, we'll try to keep it down.
Dedicated to the Memory of Pearl Harmon
Phoebe: Okay, sorry. Yeah. (They go inside to confront the father.)
[Flashback to 524 - TOI Vegas, Part II] [Scene: The Gift Shop, Monica and Chandler are entering.]
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, same scene.]
Rachel: Okay. (Joshua goes inside and to Chandler.) Every time.
Monica: Because they dont know were dating. (Again, trying to quickly change subjects.) Do you think we should eat in the kitchen? (Goes to the sink and the stove to cook.)
Rachel: (To Chandler) Im telling you its like watching Bambi learn how to walk.
[Scene: The telemarketing office, Phoebe is getting shown to her desk by the supervisor.]
Kim: Hi Rachel. Ohh, Ive been meaning to ask you. Have you seen the new Ralph Lauren sheets? Ohh, what am I thinking. Of course you have.
[Scene: Central Perk. Rachel and Phoebe are looking at some photos and they're sitting next to the window.]
Joey: All righty, what do you say we head back to my place?
Joey: I swear to god, Dad. That's not how they measure pants.
Joey: Shh. Shh. Dont try to talk, well get you up to your room, well soak your feet, youll be okay.
Joey: What? No, no, no! No, no... no... no, no... No, too much is changing, okay? First, Phoebe getting married (to Phoebe) Congratulations! (pointing to Monica and Chandler)... and then these two move into a stupid house in the stupid suburbs...
CHANDLER: Because I went to an all boys high school and God is making up for it.
Rachel: All right! Well, uh... (to Monica) we're gonna hit the beach?
Rachel: Oh! Phoebe, why did you lie to me about working here?
Mona: No, no. Listen, Ross is too nice to say anything, but this is his apartment, and, and, we gotta have some boundaries, so why dont you go back to your place and give us some privacy?
Chandler: I think thats the youngest girl ever to reject me.
Phoebe: (entering) Helloo! Oh! (sees Joey and starts to leave)
Chandler: (entering) Hey, does anybody need anything copied? Im going down to the Xerox place.
Rachel: Oh well then, so Im just going to go back to talking to my friend here. And you can go back to enjoying your little hamburger.
Ross: Oh, and she's pregnant with my baby. I always forget that part. (to Carol and Susan) Helloo!
Ross: Okay enough! This is, this is not going to happen.
Phoebe: Well, but thats what he was for me. And she you know, kind of stole him away, and then... broke his heart... and then he wouldnt even talk to me any more. Because he said he didnt wanna be around... anything that looked like either one of us.
Ross: Now, I know you wanted to bond with my dad, but did you really have to bond to that part?
Ross: Oh, I'm so excited, I mean, apparently I beat out hundreds of other applicants, included five guys I went to graduate school with. Not that I'm keeping score or anything... five!
Joey: No, no, no, see that's why you have to do this job, agents always lie. You know, Estelle just says stuff like 'They went another way', but this, I can use this. (in a very bad Italian accent) I canna work on a new accent.
Chandler: Joey, its been three days, okay.. Your just a little homesick, Okay. Would you just try to relax. Just, just try to enjoy yourself.
Young Monica: (entering the shot) Ross!!! (starts to wipe up the spill)
Chandler: You told him to play the boxer gay!!
Joey: (to Charlie) Alright, have a good time. (they kiss)
Rachel: (makes some unintelligible sound to stop her from leaving) Obviously you know how to haggle, so I'm not gonna try and take you on. Okay? So $800 and I don't call the cops because you're robbing me blind! Blind! (Covers her eyes) Just take cat, leave the money, and run away! Run away! (Uncovers her eyes and sees that the woman has fled) Damnit! (To the cat) Cat, can't you at least smile or something?! (The cat hisses at her again, it sounds like Rachel) Okay, did anybody just hear that? Anybody?
Rachel: Well, Ive been up since six. Thanks to somebodys dumb-ass rooster.
Phoebe: (to Monica's tapping) Yeah, yeah!
PHOEBE: OK, um, I'm gonna play, um, some songs about grandparents, OK. [singing] Now, grandma's a person who everyone likes, she bought you a train and a bright, shiny bike. But lately she hasn't been coming to dinner, And last time you saw her she looked so much thinner. Now, your mom and your dad said she moved to Peru, but the truth is she died and some day you will too. La-la-la la la-la-la la la-la-la la...
Joey: Sure, if you cared enough to call it first.
ROSS: Hi, Mrs. Green. [He gets up to shake her hand, but she ignores him.]
Rachel: Oh! Oh! Can I give out the candy? I really want to be with the kids right now. Yknow, ever since I got pregnant I-I have the strongest maternal instincts.
Gunther: Im sorry. Was I not supposed to?
Monica: Phoebe! Rachel! Its Monica! I wonder what you could possibly need me for on such short notice! (She bursts into the apartment to find only Phoebe and Rachel sitting on the couch.) Oh.
[Cut to the other side of the apartment, Ross has gone over to straighten things out with Paolo.]
Rachel: I just want you to know.. Last night.. I'll never forget it.
Phoebe: Oh please, somebody tell me I dont have to go to work today!
[cut to later]
Cynthia: I can't believe you thought that you were going to video tape us having sex on the first date! (She storms away and Rachel enters to confront Joey.)
Phoebe: Well tell that to them. Oh! You cant, their dead.
Phoebe: Ooh. Oh. It looks like, like a tiny little person drowning in your cereal. (Ross gives her this look, like 'Yeah, doesn't it', and gets up to dump it down the drain.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Rachel, Ross, Joey, and Phoebe are there waiting for Chandler's cyberchick to arrive]
Phoebe: I dont know, they both want to live in a house of cheese! I dont know how you fight that.
Rachel: Well, I have to say that earns tutu pieces of candy.
Joey: Interesting. all right I'll go out with her again and try to get past it (reaches for the chips) OH SALT BLOATY!
MONICA: That'll teach you to lick my muffin.
MONICA: That's good, have a seat. Um, the doctor says it's gotta be a needle. You're just gonna have to be brave, ok? Can you do that for me?
(Monica walks in, starts to go out on the balcony.)
Chandler: Well, its good that you finally have a place to do that.
Joey: Hey, uhh, I need to talk to you.
Monica: Of course! (She mouths, "I have no idea," to the rest of the gang.)
EDDIE: Ok, then I want to hear you say it, I, I want to hear you say you want me out.
Phoebe: Great! Okay, if youll just excuse me. (To the guy) So, did you hear something you liked?
ROSS: Fine, OK! Heat, heat, heat, and I'm the obsessive one. [goes to the radiator and starts turning the knob] OK, this way is on, so this is. . . [breaks off the knob] off.
Mike: I haven't been home in a couple of days and I need to get some more clothes.
Leslie: Well, I y'know, I was just, umm, I was just thinking and hoping, that umm, maybe youd want to get back together?
Phoebe: Huh, well, the girls in the satin nighties on the commercial dont seem to think its that bad.
Monica: Did anybody else feel they just wanted to peel the skin off their body, to have something else to do?
Chandler: Monica, could you excuse us for a second? I need to talk to the girl with the flowers.
Phoebe: (coming in from the bathroom) Oh, good, good, you guys are here! Listen, how would like to spend tomorrow taking care of three incredibly cute little puppies?!
Rachel: (looks at Monica) (to him) Do you want my pickle?
Chandler: You have to give 'em something, you know. Okay, now that was Gerston, Santos, and who's the guy with the moustache?
Chandler: Ill look forward to your call. (Walks away.)
Ross: (to Chandler) Wait-wait, so, you get to be my best man twice and I never get to be yours at all?
RACHEL: What happened to uh, MEG.?
Ross: I see. So what do you propose to do?
Rachel: Phoebe, your in pain, would you just go to the dentist, just go.
Chandler: (To Ross) I dont care, she slept with me.
Rachel: But y'know, I never really had anything to worry about. Ross was never very good at the flirting thing.
Ross: And this girl is making eyes at Chandler, okay? So after awhile he-he goes over to her and uh, after a minute or two, I see them kissing. Now, I know what youre thinking, Chandlers not the type of guy who just goes to bars and makes out with girls, and youre right, Chandlers not the type of guy who just goes to bars and makes out with girls.
Airline Employee: Sir! Im afraid Im gonna have to ask you to leave.
Phoebe: Hey, I never got to hear who you guys would pick to be your girlfriend.
Phoebe: Cups and ice? Ooh, I get to be in charge of cups and ice? (Thinks of something) All right. Fine, okay, I will be in charge of cups and ice!
Phoebe: I am sorry. I am, but this wedding is just really important to me.
Chandler: I got something for her. (Joey picks up the package, shakes it next to his ear, can't hear anything, switches ears, shakes it again.) It's a book!
Chandler: (to Monica) Actually hes the smallest person in the world.
Rachel: Chandler, arent you worried about what to get Monica for Christmas?
Joey: I went back to Riffs. I think Ursula likes me. All I ordered was coffee, she brought me a tuna meltt and four plates of curly fries.
Phoebe: Ok, somebody is on their way to ruin wedding okay. And I have to warn somebody, alright. So if you dont give me that number then Im going to come over there and kick your snooty ass all the way to New Glocken..shire.
Phoebe: But umm, I mean, did you talk to them about, y'know
ROSS: Well then that's it. And if George and Adelaide can't accept that, then the hell with them. Look, if my parents didn't want me to marry you, no way that would have stopped me. Look, this is your wedding. Do it.
Monica: Hey, honey, my test is down the hall, are you sure you're going to be ok?
Ross: No, y'know what, I guess it's partially my fault. Y'know, I shouldn't've, uh, asked you to start off with a monkey. I should've started you off with like a pen or a pencil.
MNCA: [to Ross] Listen, I... I don't think this is the best time.
Rachel: (coming over to Ross, who is just getting up) Are you okay?