words in movies
Chandler: Oh, we wanted to finish the crossword before we went to bed. Hey, do you know a six-letter word for red?
Chandler: Yeah, I think that's wrong, but there's a Connect the Dots in here for you later. (To Monica) Hey, how about maroon?
Monica: (checks to see if it works) Yes, you are so smart! (Kisses him.)
Dream Joey: Aww, me too. Now let's finish this and go to bed.
[Cut back to Joey in bed, he's smiling, enjoying the dream as he wakes up. Suddenly, he realized what he was dreaming about and bolts upright in bed.]
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there but Ross and Joey. Gunther hands them the bill, and Chandler gives some money to pay it.]
Joey: (To Monica) Hey. That uh, that my sweatshirt?
Monica: I'm sorry, I'll give it back to you.
Joey: No! No, you smell like a meadow. (Pause.) I'm sorry. (Runs to the bathroom.)
Chandler: Oh, y'know what? The last time Joey went to a meadow, his mother was shot by a hunter.
[Scene: A couch store, Ross is trying to decide on a new couch for his place. He has dragged Rachel along for the trip, and she's not too happy about it. Ross is sitting on it in different ways to see how it feels. He tries to just sit on it normally, and then he tries flopping on it. One thing about this couch, it's huge. It's like twice the size of a normal full size couch. Whoever designed this thing, needs help and fast.]
Ross: (To Rachel) Yeah, I still don't know. (To the salesman who is hovering nearby) I'm sorry I just wanna make sure that I bought the right couch. I need a couch that says, "Kids welcome here." But that also says, (In a sexy voice) "Come here to me!"
Rachel: What?! You say that to kids?!!
Ross: No! No! No! The "Come here to me" is y'know for the ladies.
Ross: Yeah, y'know what? I'll take it myself, thank you! (He signs the form and hands it back to the salesman.) All right Rach, let's go! (He picks up one end of the couch.)
Rachel: Yeah! (She puts on her coat and turns around and sees Ross is expecting her to help.) (Laughing.) Are you kiddin'?
Rachel: (Disgustedly she goes and tries to pick up the couch. Much to her amazement, she is successful.) Oh. Oh! I can do it!
The Salesman: Ohh, okay. (Laughs.) Something didn't quite add up there. (Ross stops, walks back to talk to the salesman, and in the process pushes Rachel up against a wall.)
Ross: What's that supposed to mean?
Rachel: Come on, I don't really want to be doing this right now. I am carrying a very heavy couch.
Rachel: (To Ross) Fine! (To the salesman) We went out.
Ross: A loser you did it with (To the salesman) 298 times!
Phoebe: Yeah that's right you are so busted. (To no one in particular.) Book 'em.
Phoebe: Save it Red! Unless you wanna spend the night in the slammer, you apologize to the tree.
The Smoking Woman: I am not going to apologize to a tree!
Phoebe: You apologize to the tree right now or I am calling for backup. (The woman calls her bluff.) (Screaming at no one in particular) Backup! Backup!!
[Scene: Ross's building's lobby, he and Rachel are about to attempt to take the couch upstairs.]
(She can't stay at the end as the couch rounds the turn so she shifts to the back corner of the couch and is at a 90-degree angle to it.)
Monica: (cooking something) Phoebe, you were supposed to take that back!
Phoebe: (To Joey) Hey.
Joey: (To Phoebe) Hey! (Sees that Monica's there.) Oh.
Joey: Yeah, I didnt know you guys were going to be here.
Joey: All right! There is something. I kinda had a dream, (pause) but I don't want to talk about it. (Starts for his room.)
Chandler: Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-what-what if Martin Luther King had said that? (Imitating what his famous speech would sound like.) I kinda have a dream! I dont want to talk about it.
Chandler: You had a dream about a girl that I am seeing?! Oh, that is so cool! (To Monica) I can't tell you how many times I've dreamt about a girl that he was seeing. (Seeing Monica's stare.) (To Joey) Anyway we're talking about your dream. (To Monica) I love you. (To Joey) Your dream? (Leans in to listen closely.)
Monica: Or, it could mean that-that you saw Chandler and me together and we y'know were being close and stuff and then you just want to have that with someone too.
Chandler: Joey, look, are you attracted to Monica? Right here, right now, are you attracted to her?
Joey: No, I don't think it's just about just getting a girlfriend. Y'know? I mean, yeah, I can get a girlfriend! Yeah, we could sit in the chair and do crosswords, but y'know are we ever going to have y'know the closeness like-like you guys have?
[Scene: Outside Central Perk, Phoebe is walking up and notices a car that is parked half on the curb and right in front of the door, making it difficult for people to enter Central Perk.]
Phoebe: Well I don't think it's very nice of you to park here, y'know you're blocking the entrance.
Phoebe: Ohh, no. (Pause) Oh okay, so you're a cop which means you can park anywhere, 'cause I know that 'cause I'm a cop too. So, all right, keep up the good work. 10-4. (Tries to leave.)
Phoebe: (starts to walk away, but stops) Dont try to call him or anything, 'cause he's not there, he's out. His umm, his partner just died.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is entering. Rachel is there getting some tools to help Ross out.]
Joey: Uh, hey, Rach let me ask you something. Uh, I was just over there talking to Monica and Chandler, boy they are really tight.
Rachel: (laughs and pushes the chair back in) Yeah, well, y'know umm No honey, listen I think it's a great idea to become friends with someone before you date them, but I think the way you do it is y'know you meet someone, become their friend, build a foundation, then you ask them out on a date. Don't hit on your existing friends!
[Scene: The lobby of Ross's building, he's sitting on the couch at the bottom of the stairs, and he's practicing enticing women to join him on the couch.]
Ross: Come here to me. No-no, you come here to me.
Ross: Look, I-I drew a sketch about how we're gonna do it. (Showing them) Okay Rach, (points to the sketch) that's you. That's the couch. (Points again.)
Rachel: Ross, I don't, I just don't think it's going to fit.
Ross: Okay, I don't think it's going to pivot anymore.
(As they start back down the couch drops a little bit and gets jammed. They try to free it to no avail.)
Monica: Joey, I thought you were gonna try to be friends first!
Joey: (To Rachel) Well look, hey, it's all your fault!
Joey: Well because you didn't give me advice! No! You gave me a pickup line! As soon as I told her I wanted to y'know, build a foundation and be friends first. I suddenly, through no fault of my own, became irresistible to her! (Pause) And her roommate!
(They all walk over to get a slice.)
(He throws his piece back in the box, runs into the living room, looks for a place to hide the pizza, finds one, slides the box under the couch, sits down on the table, and tries to quickly chew the food in his mouth.)
Rachel: Oh my God, Phoebe, are you gonna go to jail?!
Phoebe: Well, if I'm going down, I'm taking you (Points at all of them) with me. (They all look at her.) Harboring a fugitive? That's one to three years minimum. Good luck Chandler. (She opens the door to the cop from before.) Okay, you can arrest me. Fine. But you'll never make it stick and you know it!
Phoebe: Yep! As long as you understand that I'm going to call my lawyer and once he puts you on the stand he'll make you look like a fool. A fool!
Cop: Okay, so since umm, you're not going to jail tonight I was wondering if you would like to go to dinner with me?
Phoebe: Umm, yeah, I'd like to go out with you officer
Phoebe: Yeah! So--ooh, I gotta ask you though. How did you know where to find me?
Gary: Okay. (He starts to leave.) So I'll come by in a couple hours and pick you up?
Chandler: (To Rachel) He has a gun!
[Scene: The couch store, Ross is talking to a saleswoman.]
Ross: I'd like to return this couch. I'm not satisfied with it.
[The camera cuts to show the couch, which has been cut in half.]
Ross: This couch, is cut in half! I would like to exchange it for one that is not cut in half!
The Saleswoman: You're telling me this couch was delivered to you like this?!
Chandler: (to Rachel) You know what I just realized? We have no idea what we're doing in the wedding tomorrow.
Joey: (laughs) Monica, look... I don't think you and I have any secrets anymore... (Monica keeps looking at Joey) Not ready to joke about it yet, okay, I see you later. (Joey walks out)
Chandler: Oh, I dont know man. I havent talked to her in like ten years.
Rachel: Oh, thank you... (looks at his face trying to remember his name)
Phoebe: Well, it was just, it was all so crazy, you know. I mean, Chandler was in the closet, counting to 10, and he was up to 7 and I hadn't found a place to hide yet. I-I-I meant to tell you, and I wrote it all down on my hand. See, all of it. (shows him her hand)
Phoebe: All right. Oh! Shoot! Oh shoot! Uh, Rachel wanted to see this tape!
(Rachel enters in a wet wedding dress and starts to search the room.)
Phoebe: (excited)Hey you guys! Ok, you're not going to believe this! I just saw my psychic and she said I was definitely gonna win the lottery tonight!
Conan: Now you guys work with animals a lot. You had to work early on with a monkey
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler is getting a cup of coffee and sits down next to Monica.]
MONICA: Aren't you afraid that Joey's going to figure all of this out?� (pause)� I heard it.
Joey: I cant believe Im going to lose this job!
PHOEBE: I don't know how to say this, but I think when your wife's spirit left her body, it um, kind of stuck around in me.
Chandler: (Pointing to the table and picking up the box.) Is that your tiny little box, thats too small to put anything in?
[Scene: The airport, the flight to Yemen is being called.]
Joey: (to Ross): Ahhh, that's alright. Y'know, that's a tough hand to beat.
[Cut to Rachel staring out of her window.]
(He walks dejectedly into his apartment to find it lit with about a thousand candles and Monica standing in the living room.)
Paul: Oh, you dont have to do that every time.
ROSS: Rach, come on, open up. Rach, come on, come on, Rach. You got to give me another chance.
[Cut to Living Room]
Rachel: It's not? (whispering to Ross) When was she born?
Janice: I know! And Im just getting out of a marriage, I mean talk about meant to be!
Chandler: Okay, I will do it. But I have to warn you; this may make me a better person and that is not the man you feel in love with!
Joey: The thing is cause I live with Rachel Im here for a lot of the stuff, okay? (To Rachel) And Ross Ross is missing everything. So
KEVIN: All right. It's no big deal. BILL: So, she has a boyfriend. What is your situation? RACHEL: Oh, well, it's complicated. I don't actually have a boyfriend.� But um. . . BILL: Then, can I have your number? RACHEL: (pause) I'm sorry, no. BILL: Okay. (They start to walk away.) RACHEL: Oh sure.� (She pulls a business card from her purse and writes on it.) PHOEBE: (Reading the card.) Oh my God, you're giving your real number. BILL: Okay, thanks. I'll give you a call later tonight. RACHEL: Great. BILL: Bye PHOEBE: Bye. (The guys leave.) Wow. So, that's great. You, Bill, Ross, and Emma are going to be so happy together. What were you thinking?
Joey: Were now in the ceremony, Monica is about to say, "I do" when her drunk uncle starts yelling. What do you do? Go!
Rachel: (starting to cry) Ohh, you guys are so made for each other.
Rachel: Well, they said would but they would only give me store credit. I mean, what am I going to do, get a thousand regular cats?
[Cut to the inside of Monica and Rachel's apartment, Monica and Rachel are sitting at the table.]
Rachel: Yeah, my mom got my dads season tickets in the divorce, so she just gave them to me.
Monica: (telling Chandler the seating arrangement) Okay so this is where the band is. (Points.) And this is where the bar is. (Points) And all these pins have peoples names on them. (She has pins to show the seating at each of the tables.) And Rach, here you are. (Points to Rachels place.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler is still doing the hairball thing as Monica and Phoebe are watching the babies. I cant describe it, youll have to see it when it comes on in your area.]
Ross: Im trying to tell you I made you a mix tape.
Chandler: Again I must go back to, how?
Rachel: No. I have got to get ready and go to a dinner at my bosses house. Its a very big deal, theres a lot of people there I have to meet.
Phoebe: There you go! Oh, you are so lucky! You might actually get to meet Sting tomorrow! Thats why you have kids!
Ross: (to himself) Good for a scrud.
Joey: Baby shower. Wow! That sounds sooo like something I dont want to do! Later! (Finally, he makes his exit.)
CAROL: And then Susan and I got in this big fight because I said maybe we should call off the wedding, and she said we weren't doing it for them, we were doing it for us, and if I couldn't see that, then maybe we should call off the wedding. I don't know what to do.
Phoebe: Well, that’s what I said, but it turns out, Mike was planning on proposing to me that same way last night!
Phoebe: Oh sure okay, you can touch yourself in front of us but you cant talk to Rachel.
Joshua: Man, I could really flash somebody in this thing. (He goes to put his hands in his pockets.)
Joey: (angrily and monotone) Any one of the brilliant actresses nominated for this award tonight deserves to take it home. Unfortunately only one can. (Shakes his head in disgust.) The nominees for Best Supporting Actress are from Passions Erin Goff. (There is applause, which Joey disgustedly waits to dye out.) From One Life to Live Mary Loren Bishop (They start to applaud again, but Joey interrupts in with the rest of the nominees), from All My Children Sarah Mchann, and from Days of Our Lives Jessica Ashley. And the winner is (Opens the envelope) Jessica Ashley from Days of Our Lives. (Applause) Uh, unfortunately Jessica couldnt be with us tonight so Ill be accepting this award on her behalf. (Realizes something) And Im sure that Jessica would like to thank my parents who always believed in me. Shed also like to thank my friends, Chandler, Monica, Ross, Phoebe, and Rachel whos sittin right there! (Points at Rachel.) (The music starts and his microphone is turned off, this angers Joey again and he disgustedly exits.)
Phoebe: I have to go scream into a pillow. (Goes to scream into a pillow)
Ross: All right Emily, as much as I love you, I'm sorry, I can't move to London without Ben.
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Ross is coming out of the living room carrying his salad and a puzzlebeer! Cold beer. And he decides to fold up Phoebes massage table, but being Ross has trouble with it as there is a knock on the door. He sets the table back up and opens the door to reveal a beautiful woman.]
Rachel: Oh no-no-no-no-no, I'm still waiting to hear from that job and the store closes at nine, so you can eat then.
Monica: Oh no, you see were on our honeymoon. So umm, can you do your little thing and bump us up to first class?
Rachel: And you weren't going to tell us? How did you think you were gonna get away with that?
Ross: Hey, theyre going to the gym together! Two women! Stretching! Yknow they-they take a steam together! Things get a little playfuldidnt you see Personal Best?
Phoebe: Well look, if I wanted to see a fireman, I would date one. Okay? (she drags him away)
CHANDLER: Yes. She was smart, she was pretty, and she honestly cared about me. Janice is my last chance to have somebody.
Monica: Well, are you asleep right now, Joe? Cause I dont think you have to wear it unless you are!
Rachel: Yeah! You can hook it up to your TV and you get radio!
Monica: I figured out I need to charge seventeen bucks a jar just to break even. So, I've got a new plan now. Babies.
Ross: Yknow actually it does have a very interesting history. Uh, this street is the first street in the city to have an underground sewer system. (Kristen crinkles her nose at that.) Before that sewage and waste would just flow right down the street. Yeah, sometimes ankle deep! (He stops when he realizes what hes talking about.)
Mr. Geller: Oh, well, I, I guess it musta been the day after you were born. We were in the hospital room, your mother was asleep, and they brought you in and gave you to me. You were this ugly little red thing, and all of a sudden you grabbed my finger with your whole fist. And you squeezed it, so tight. And that's when I knew.
(Rachel looks all around as if all the eyes in the chapel were looking at her as the picture fades to black.)
Monica: (To Monica) Danny. Are you guys ever gonna go out again?
CHANDLER: I had sex today. I never have to answer that phone again.
Monica: (To Rachel) Oh, are the drapes still closed hon?
Gary: I want you to move in with me.
JOEY: Oh, Richard's here. I should run down say bye to him (runs out)
(Phoebe enters, walks to the couch, sits down, and begins to read a letter without saying hi.)
Mike: Look, if Phoebe wants to marry David, she should, I'm not gonna stand in the way of that and neither should you.
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Emma continues to cry.]
Rachel: Oh thank you. Hey yknow, Im so sorry to hear about you and Elizabeth.
[Cut back to the cast and Conan.]
Joey: Absolutely. But, were gonna stop by the hospital just to be sure, okay? Ill page Ross on the way. Come on.
Ross: So you gonna invite us all to the big opening?
Chandler: Okay. (Sees the living room.) You opened all the presents without me?! I thought we were supposed to do that together!
Chandler: And I love the milk! But, Im not gonna some British girl to move in with me! (Realizes that made no sense.) Joey, you say things now.
Rachel: Yes! And not because I want you to go out with me, but because I dont want you to go out with anybody! Okay? I know its a terrible thing to even think this, and its completely inappropriate, but I want you to be at my constant beck and call 24 hours a day! Im very sorry, but that is just the way that I feel.
Janice: Okay, you know, one of two things is happening here. Either you're seeing somebody behind my back, which would make you the biggest jerk on the planet. Or, else you're pretending that you're seeing somebody, which just makes you so pathetic that I could start crying right here in the cereal aisle. So like which of these two guys do you want to be? (another guy walks by)
Joey: Are you kidding me? Watch! (Makes funny faces trying to cry) Well I cant do it with you guys watching me!
Monica: (interrupting him) No-no-no, dont-dont do the accent. Youve got to see her again.
Joey: (to himself) Man, this is a long drive! Are my eyes open? No! (He opens his eyes and sees a hitchhiker.)
Phoebe: Oh, Ill get it. (goes over to the door.)
Monica: Oh no sweetie, no! This is my fault, I wasnt clear! Im really sorry. And listen, you take as much time as you need to move out okay? Theres absolutely no rush.
Monica: Guys, hurry up! The flight leaves in four hours! It could take time to get a taxi! There could be traffic! The plane could leave early! When we get to London, there could be a line at customs! Come on!! (She runs back to her apartment.)
[Scene: Chandler and Eddie's apartment. Chandler is at the foosball table trying to get Phoebe to play a game with him.]
Chandler: What would you give to a kid if he wanted a ticket to play with?
Monica: (sits down) Oh good. Good, look I'm so sorry, for screwing up that cutting-her-out plan. But I have a new plan. Chandler agreed to call here in a few minutes with an emergency.
Monica: Oh yeah, of course. I'm fine it's just that(She drops the box and in a reflex action tries to catch it with her arm, the knife slips out and slowly flips through the air and comes point first down into Chandler's shoe.)
Rachel: Come on! I am here to take care of you! What do you need? Anything.
Chandler: What does a guy have to do to be taken seriously around here?!
Joey: If you want, Ill sell my friends and use the money to buy you presents.
Ross: (worried) Dude, I need to talk to you a sec.
Rachel: Ross said my name. Okay? My name. Ross said my name up there that obviously means that he still loves me! (They both just stare at her.) Okay, dont believe me, I know Im rightdo you guys want to go downstairs and get a drink?
Dr. Green: Oh? Really? Thats what my daughter means to you? Nothing?
Joey: (to Monica) Did that guy really make that joke?
Monica: I'll take it down to 95% but that's the best I can do.
Chandler: No, I invited him to dinner so you could get a chance to get to know him! I mean, if we go through a sperm bank you never meet the guy, get to check him out.
Monica: Chandler, we have talked about this. You are not supposed to give people advice! Now couldn't you just have made some sort of inappropriate joke?
Rachel: Alright, Monica, I want you to have the first taste.
Rachel: (She takes the T-shirt out of the box and holds it to her chest and take a deep breath.) No. Nothing. (She smiles and goes into her room.)
Rachel: Well, we were going to do that afterI mean umm, next.
The Producer: Im sorry, why dont we do that right now? Hes right here. (Points to a guy.)
Alice: Weve been trying to get pregnant, uh pretty much ever since we got engaged, we thought wed get a jump on things, yknow no ones getting any younger.