words in movies
(Chandler acts disgusted, but is happy that Joey has stopped snoring. However, just as he is about to leave, Joey starts snoring again. So to get him to stop, he slams the door shut, waking Joey.)
Chandler: Gunther, can I get another cup of coffee, please? (Gunther starts to pour him another cup.) So uh, what do you do when youre not working here?
Gunther: You dont need to fill these silences.
Chandler: Oh, okay, thanks. (He goes back to the couch and rejoins Monica, Joey, and Phoebe.)
Chandler: Its not something to be proud of, okay? You have to go to a sleep clinic!
Joey: Look, I told ya, Im not going to any clinic! I dont have a problem, youre the one with the problem! You should go to a "Quit being a baby and leave me alone" clinic!
Monica: Yknow I used to go out with this guy that was a really light sleeper, and whenever I started to snore, he would just roll me over
Ross: Yeah, but it didnt fit. Well, luckily theres a store here that has one left in her size, but Im the groom, Im not supposed to see the dress
Rachel: Yeah, yeah, I was just about to take a break anyways, so
Ross: So listen uh, I know you and I havent really had a chance to talk since uh, Emily and I decided to get married, and uh, I was just wondering how you were.
Ross: All right, I just wanted to check.
(He goes over to hug her.)
Rachel: You are right there with Emily. And its yknow, its kinda like . its a tie! Well, I gotta get, I gotta get back to the dishes.
Ross: I gotta get to work.
Rachel: (to the closed door) Hang in there. You hang in there. (Gives him the raspberry.)
[Scene: Beatrice Bridal Shop, Monica and Phoebe are there to pick up Emilys dress.]
Monica: Oh, yes, umm, Im here to pick up a dress that you have on hold.
The Saleslady: Yes! I have it right here. (Phoebe and Monica both gasp at the dress.) Would you like to try it on Ms. Waltham?
Monica: All right. (Goes to take off the dress.)
[Scene: Joeys bedroom, hes snoring again and Chandler is there to roll him over.]
Chandler: All right buddy, time to roll over. (Rolls him over, and discovers a surprise) (Looking down) No-no! (Covers his eyes) No, no-n-n-n-no!! You are going to a clinic! Youre going to a clinic, and a pyjama store!
[Time lapse, Monica is now wearing the dress while doing the dishes and is making like she is thanking her guests for coming to her wedding. Paging Dr. Crane. Dr. Fraiser Crane!]
Phoebe: No, you have to let me in right now!!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is complaining about going to the clinic.]
Joey: This sucks! I didnt know I had to stay up all night before I went to this stupid sleep clinic! Im so tired!
Chandler: Hey, I hear that you and Joshua are going out to dinner with Ross and Emily, and I think thats, I think thats really cool.
Rachel: Handling it? What do you mean, handling it? Theres nothing to handle. Now, maybe I would have a problem with this if it wasnt for me and Joshua. Yknow, theyre not gonna get married anyway!
Chandler: Because weddings are a great place to meet women, and when I dance, I look like this (Starts to dancing really, really, really badly. Ross enters behind him and he stops.)
Ross: Yeah! Yeah, Emily always wanted to get married in this beautiful place that her parents got married, but its going to be torn down, so I mean, I-I know its crazy, but everything up til now has been so crazy, and I dont know, this just feels right. Yknow?
Rachel: Ohh, nothing, I just wanted to see you. See you and hug you. (Hugs him) See you.
Rachel: Yeah-yeah, yknow if-if there was just like one little area where Ithat I think we needwe would need to work on; I-I would think it was were just not crazy enough!
Chandler: Youre coming on to the entire room! (He goes over to pick up a stack of magazines next to her, and to get her attention, he throws them back down.) Im Chandler.
(He sits down next to her.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Phoebe, still defying reality, are now throwing a bouquet at each other, pretending to catch the actual bouquet at an actual wedding.]
(She turns around and throws the bouquet to Phoebe.)
Monica: (cocking her head from side to side in some pre-bouquet-catching ritual) Yeah.
Phoebe: Im not gonna right to you! Thats not real!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Phoebe, back to reality, are sitting in normal clothes.]
Chandler: Yep! And! A beautiful woman agreed to go out with me. (Theyre stunned.) Joey wanted to ask her out, but uh, she picked me.
Joey: (muffled) Oh, they gave it to me at the sleep clinic, and its gonna help me not to snore.
Monica: Well, are you asleep right now, Joe? Cause I dont think you have to wear it unless you are!
Rachel: Well, I did my best to convince him that Im not some crazy girl who is dying to get marriedIm just going through a hard time.
Monica: Ohh, sweetie! (Goes to comfort her.) Hey, I bet you anything that hes gonna call you again.
Rachel: And I-I am just trying to figure out why.
Rachel: (breaking the hug) Oh, hey, dont you have to go pick up Emily?
Rachel: Oh, okay! (She goes to answer the door.)
Rachel: Okay, you guys, just relax. (She goes over to open the door, and as she does, she says.) I doooo. (Sees that its Joshua, not Chandler that knocked on the door.)
[Scene: Chandlers bedroom, he is sleeping with Marjorie. All of the sudden, Marjorie starts talking in her sleep, awakening Chandler. After a little bit, she quiets back down, and Chandler tries to get back to sleep. Theres a short pause until she starts screaming, causing Chandler to scream with her. She quickly calms down. This all wakes up Joey, who comes over wearing the mouth guard, opens the top half of Chandlers door, and starts to complain about the noise.]
Joey: (muffled by the mouth guard) Dude! I am trying to sleep! (Shrugs to say, "Whats up with that?")
Doug: Ha! (goes to smack him on the butt, but stops, faking Chandler out) Ahhhhhhh!
Monica: Joey, I thought you were gonna try to be friends first!
[Cut to the living room where Monica is helping pack a box.]
Janice: Im sorry I find it hard to believe that a group of people who spends as much time together as you guys do has never bumped uglies.
Ross: Its called the Bapstein-King comet, okay? (Joey starts to groan.) Hey! Hey! Bapstein was a very well respected astronomer!
Monica: Well, well Ross didnt care enough to be here, so I think hes out. You snooze you lose.
Joey: It was amazing! And not just for her... uh-uh. For me, too. It's like, all of a sudden, I'm blind. But all my other senses are heightened, y'know? It's like... I was able to appreciate it on another level.
(Chandler sees Phoebe breaking up with Tony. She talks to him for a few seconds, hugs him, and then he leaves. Chandler is amazed how easy it was for her.)
Ross: Marcel, c'mere, c'mere. (He sits down and Marcel jumps down and sits beside him) Well buddy, this is it. There's just a coupla things I want to say. I'm really gonna miss you, and I'm never gonna forget about you. You've been more than just a pet to me, you've been more like a be- (Marcel climbs down and starts humping his leg) Okay, Marcel, please, could you leave my leg alone? Could you just stop humping me for two seconds?! Marcel, would- okay, just take him away. Just take him.
Ross: is for me not to see you anymore.
Phoebe: Umm, yeah, I'd like to go out with you officer
David: Where the story was that I was anticipating that I would be around to hear my sons first words spoken. But the scene was about that he wasnt supposed to be able to speak and, uh for some reason when we started doing the show
Ross: A pigeon, a pigeon. (previously scared Rachel turns away) No, no wait, no-no, an eagle flew in. Landed on the stove and caught fire. The baby, seeing this, jumps across the apartment to the mighty bird�s aid. The eagle, however, misconstrues as an act of aggression and grabs the baby on its talon. Meanwhile the faucet fills the apartment with water. Baby and bird still up lays (?) are locked in a death grip, swirling around the whirl pool, that fills the apartment.
Monica: Okay. It's-it's about Alan. There's something that you should know. I mean, there's really no easy way to say this.. uh.. I've decided to break up with Alan.
CHANDLER: Oh, yeah, easy for you to say, you don't have to walk around sporting some reject from the Mr. T collection. [Joey walks in behind Chandler]
[Scene: Ursulas apartment, Phoebe is going to confront her twin about her new porn career.]
Chandler: Oh well, not as lovely as you. I mean, I cant believe that you would have a thirty-year-old daughter! (To Mr. Geller) And you! I cant believe that you would have a tux thats thirty years old! (Puts his hand on Mr. Gellers shoulder.)
JOEY: Absolutely.� You'd do it for me.� Not that you ever have to because I know how to keep my women satisfied.
[Back in Monica's party. Phoebe is talking to a guy and two girls at the party.]
Rachel: (to Ross): So basically, you get your ya-yas by taking money from all of your friends.
Monica: (turns his back to the stairs) Oh, it's a great party! Great food. Y'know, most parties it's all chips and salsa, chips and salsa. (As she's saying this Rachel tries to head downstairs but is blocked by people coming upstairs. She quickly retreats back up the stairs.) (Sees that she has to keep him distracted longer.) So umm, what's this? (Points to his plate.)
(Cut to later. Everyone is totally depressed by now.)
Gunther: Im sorry. Was I not supposed to?
Melissa: Listen, we-we have to have dinner. What-what are you doing tomorrow night?
Rachel: Well, I didn't know what else to do!
(Phoebe scoots her chair over to Rachel and hugs her)
(She makes a show of bending over to get her coat and showing off her bum. She then walks out, leaving no one to eat her cookie.)
Ross: Thanks. (he takes the card) Hey, I know where this place is! It used to be an X-rated video... (pauses when he realizes what he is saying) florist. (he goes away)
Malcom: I was thinking what it would be like to kiss you.
Ross: Every week, the TV Guide comes to Chandler and Joeys apartment. What name appears on the address label?
Phoebe: Yeah. Lets see, my had Mom killed herself, and my Dad had run off, and I was living in a Gremlin with a guy named Cindy who talked to his hand.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Rachel, and Chandler are trying to throw cards into a vase.]
Ross: If you have to call me name, I prefer "Ross the Divorcer". It's just cooler. Look, I know my marriage isn't exactly work out. But I love to be that committed to another person. And Carol had some good times before she became a lesbian... and once afterward. I'm sorry.
Monica: I can't believe she's gonna say yes to David. She's clearly in love with Mike.
RICHARD: Now I do. [they kiss and fall to the bed]
[cut to later in the game]
Monica: What?! Why? Why is this crazy? So this isn't the ideal way to something....
Monica: Okay, count to three. 1. 2. 3!
Ross: (sits down next to her) I'm sorry, I was an idiot.
Joey: (entering) Hey. (Ross turns to see who it is, and seeing its Joey he just ignores him and turns back around.) Ross, I know youre pissed at me, but we have to talk about this.
Chandler: Yeah, well, dont expect that to happen anytime soon!
Ross: Wha? Oh, come on. You didnt have tosaltwater taffy?! (Mona laughs) Thanks! This is interesting. You know, most people think this is made with sea water, but its actually made with, uh, salted fresh water. Thats not interesting.
Joey: How come you have two? Chandler: Well this one's for you. Joey: Get out. Chandler: No, I can't. No-no, listen, I, I know how much this means to you and I also know that this is about more than just jewelry, (Puts bracelet on Joey) it's about you and me and the fact that we're (Reading bracelet) best buds. Joey: Wow, is this friendship? I think so. Check it out, we're bracelet buddies. Chandler: That's what they'll call us. [The next one is from Episode 618: The One Where Ross Dates A Student.]
CHANDLER: Alright you guys are off to party number one [ushers 3 guys into Monica's apartment] and you, you are off to party number two [ushers four women into his apartment. Two guys try to follow and Chandler blocks them and shoos them off to Monica's apartment] Alright fellas, let's keep it movin', let' keep it movin.
(They turn to look at each other and suddenly remember that they did in fact get married.)
Estelle: (Looks confused) Let me start over. I just got a call about an audition. I think you can still make it. It's down at the Astor Theatre and you need to have a monologue prepared.
Rachel: Okay then! (She starts rummaging through the trash to find Kim's lighter.)
Dr. Green: (laughs) Poppy. (To Phoebe) Oh, Im gonna be a poppy. (Stops laughing) So when is the wedding?
Rachel: Well, I assume Ill have to take showers with him, but y'know, thats true of any job.
Monica: Look, these clowns are trying to take us for a ride and I'm not gonna let 'em! And we're not a couple of suckers!
Chandler: I'm not gonna talk to her, she obviously got my message and is choosing not to call me. Now I'm needy and snubbed. God, I miss just being needy.
Phoebe: Because she exchanges every gift she ever gets, its like impossible to get her something she likes. Come on, lets trade!
Phoebe: Umm, Im trying to move that pencil. (Theres a pencil lying on the table.)
Ross: No, Monicas restaurant got a horrible review in the Post. (They all gasp.) I didnt want her to see it, so I ran around the neighborhood and bought all the copies I could find. (He hands the paper to Phoebe and they all read it.)
Ross: Oh, oh. Of course. God, I'm so stupid. You guys are a couple now. I mean, you probably just want to be alone.
Gym Employee: (to Ross) So, are you a member of any gym.
[Scene: Central Perk, the gang's all there. Ross has a slip of paper that he throws on the ground tying to get Rachel's attention.]
Phoebe: A real man wouldnt just run to the hospital! (They dont stop.) No! What would, what would Krog do? (They ignore her and Phoebe is left alone.)
Rachel: (not sure of what to do) Yknow what? I dont, I dont think Phoebe really wants to come.
Phoebe: (to Vince) Well, that couldve been really awkward.
Rachel: Oh my God, it's so huge, but you just have to promise me that you cannot tell anyone.
Rachel: Now that youre on youre own, youre free to look as stupid as you like.
Rachel: Oh wow, you didnt even try to unhook my bra!
[Scene: The Doctors office, Phoebe is giving a pep talk to the petrie dish containing the embryos.]
Phoebe: Hi, its Phoebe. Listen someones gonna have to take my 9:00 with Mr. Rehack, cause its like 9:15 now, and Im not there.
Ross: Well, I don't know what else to do. I mean, I either keep my wife and lose one of my-my-my best friends or I keep my friend and get divorced the second time before I'm 30! So-so if anyone has-has a better suggestion, let's hear it! 'Cause I-I got nothing! All right, don't be shy, any suggestion will do. (There are none.) Okay then. Here we go. Magic 8 Ball, should I never see Rachel again? (He turns it over and reads the answer) Ask again later. Later is not good enough. (He shakes it up again and reads the answer.) Ask again later. What the hell! This is broken! It-it is broken!
Phoebe: Well, maybe we will. (Starts to walk away.) Oh! (She turns around and the exchange information.)
Monica: Vomit tux? Who vomited ony'know what, what you up to Joe?
Monica: So its okay to date a student.
Amy: This might be my one chance to have a baby Rachel. I mean, you know that I have been so busy focusing on my carrer.
Rachel: Or Carol! But theyre funny to kids and who is it hurting?!
Chandler: What a great apology! (To Monica) And you accept! Okay, bye-bye!
Rachel: Okay guys, way to wish me luck!
Phoebe: Okay, great so do you want to do it together?
Chandler: Well, you dont you have Captain Hook explain it to her.
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Marcel is hanging from Celia's hair, and she is screaming, trying to get him off.]
Joey: Eww! Look, I'm asking a favor here. If I do this for her brother, maybe Angela will come back to me.
Ross: Hey, youre not going to believe this. I made up a joke and sent it in to Playboy. They printed it!
Rachel: A mistake?! What were you trying to put it in? Her purse?!
Carol: Y'know, I don't really know you well enough for you to do that.
(They all get up to leave.)
Chandler: (from his bedroom) All right, so you're telling me that I have to tell racist jokes now?!
Rachel: (to the gang) Oh my God, Melissa Warburton. I dont think I have the energy for this.
Joey: She said she wants to slather my body with stuff and then lick it off. I'm not even sure what slathering is, but I definitely want to be a part of it.
Monica: Rachel, you can go down there, you don't have to smoke. Just say you wanna get some fresh air.
Chandler: Yes. It's very difficult to appreciate a Thanksgiving dinner once you've seen it in reverse.
RACHEL: C'mon, I'm not saying it was a bad movie, I'm just saying, you know, it was a little. . . hard to follow.
Joey: They want me to be totally naked in the movie!
Ross: Ugh, easy for you to say, you already know what your kids names are going to be.
Frank: (To Phoebe) Hey! Am I late? Am I late? Nobody came out yet, right?
Mr. Treeger:: Thank you, listen, thanks a lot Tribbiani, (checks watch). Oh my God, look at the time, I gotta catch the bus to the ball.
Joey: Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait, whoa. Do you ah, want to get her something speacial, get her flowers, get her candy, get her gum, girls love gum.
Phoebe: No! No, we have an emergency. Okay? Rachels coming to London.
C.H.E.E.S.E.: (Wayne with a computerized voice) Nice to meet you Mac!
Carol: (noticing a kid who has picked up a copy of Variety to read) Hey, that kid looks familiar.
Joey: And then, then he could use his teeth, his teeth to undo her dress, and, and, and bite her!
Frank: Yeah, I love you. Okay, bye! (To Rachel) Hi!
Joey: Hey Pheebs! (To the guys) Hey!
[Scene: The Hallway, Chandler is trying to get Janice out of his apartment.]
Rachel: I guess I can talk to one of my supervisors