words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone but Phoebe are there reading. Rachel is sitting on the couch flanked by Ross and Monica. She suddenly stops reading and starts blinking her left eye as if it's bothering her. The problem is that Joey is on her left and thinks she's winking at him and winks back. Ross is watching this and isn't quite sure of what to make of it.]
(Ross turns to look at Joey.)
Monica: (To Rachel) Wow! It's really red! You should go see my eye doctor.
Rachel: Well, I'm sorry I'm not going to an eye doctor!
Ross: Anytime anything comes close to touching her eye or anyone else's she like freaks out. Watch! Watch! (He takes his finger and moves it towards his eye.)
Ross: Hey, does anybody want to get some lunch? All those in favor say I? (Pokes his eye)
Ross: All right, I gotta go. I'm taking Ben to the park.
Phoebe: (after he's gone) I am so sorry you got caught in the middle of that. I didn't mean to be so out there. I am furious with him!
Joey: And the best part is, we're filming in the desert outside Vegas! (To Chandler) And you know what that means buddy!
Joey: Road trip! Yeah, we can rent a car! I just have to be there by Tuesday!
Phoebe: No! No, her cab! She probably won't be using it; you can drive it to Las Vegas.
Chandler: Whoa-whoa-whoa, what are we going to do about my job?
Chandler: All right, great, road trip baby! (To Monica) This okay with you?
Monica: Chandler! You don't have to ask for my permission. (Quietly) You can go.
Rachel: (entering from her bedroom) All right! Let's get this over with! Ugh! (She walks by the table and notices that no one is looking and accidentally on purpose knocks over the open cereal box.) Ohhh! No! Look what I did! (She starts walking through the mess. {Also, notice the continuity error in this scene. Note the position of the box and dispersal pattern of the cereal before and after the camera cut.}) Oh, I mean, look at this mess! I mean, we're probably gonna have to clean this up! Y'know? We're gonna have to reschedule!
Monica: No. If you thought this mess is going to bother me, you are wrong! All right, let's go Blinky! (She ushers Rachel out the door, but before the door fully closes she sticks her head back in.) Chandler!!!! (Chandler agrees to clean up the mess.)
Joey: I can't decide which route to take to Vegas. Hey, you've traveled a lot right?
Joey: Well, back to square one.
Phoebe: Oh, I know a way that you can decide! All right, I'm going to ask you a series of questions and you answer as quickly as you can.
Phoebe: Good, but wait. Okay, all right, here we go. Now I want you to relax. Take a deep breath. Clear your mind. (Quickly) Which do you like better peanut butter or egg whites?
Ross: Uhh, not much. You guys want to see a movie tonight?
Joey: Sure, what do you want to see?
Phoebe: Umm, no thank you. (She gets up and moves to the couch. They were at a table previously.)
(Ross pauses and looks at him, Joey motions for him to hurry up.)
[Scene: Monica's eye doctor's office, Monica and Rachel are waiting in an exam room and looking at this big white thing used to check eyes. I have no idea what it is, and if an ophthalmologist happens to know what that is, let me know.]
Rachel: (really excited) Great!! It was very, very nice to meet you sir--Ow! Hey! What are you doing?! Are you crazy! (He took out that thing they use to look at people's retinas and looked at Rachel's when she was shaking his hand causing her to flinch and scream at him.)
Dr. Miller: Okay. You've got a small, minor infection in that left eye. I want you to take these drops three times a day and you'll be as good as new.
Monica: I sure do! (She runs over to a drawer, opens it, and grabs a lollipop.) (To Rachel) And you don't get one!
Joey: Hey! You ready to go?
Chandler: Yeah, listen, how cold is it going to be there? Do I need a coat or will all these sweater vests be enough? (Holds up 3 of them in different colors.)
{There's another continuity error here. Before Monica says I love you, Chandler's holding the vests so that you couldn't see the collar, you could see all three, and they were folding nicely. After she says the line and the camera cuts back to Chandler, you can only see two out of the three, you can see the collar of the top one, and it looks like it was folded sloppily, unlike before. Hey, you notice things while spending this much time on this!}
Ross: I just wanna say good-bye to you guys and to see if you guys will place a little bet for me, huh? Twenty bucks on black 15.
(Joey nods to Chandler, no way!)
Joey: Anybody want to say good-bye to me at the car?
Rachel: Oh honey, I'll say good-bye to you at the car if you don't mind the puss.
Ross: Hey Pheebs, what 'cha reading? (Phoebe ignores him) Pheebs? (Turns away) Hello? (He sits down next to her and she moves over a bit.) Phoebe? (He moves closer and she keeps moving away.) Phoe-Phoebe! (They end up hanging over the arm rest.) Come on! (He grabs the magazine away from her.)
(Ross isn't sure what to do with that comment.)
[Scene: Phoebe's cab, Joey and Chandler are headed across the George Washington bridge on their way to Las Vegas. Joey is driving.]
Joey: Man, I'm getting pretty tired. You're might have to take over soon.
Joey: Ooh, hey, I know how we can decide! All right, uh, I'm gonna ask you a bunch of questions and then you have to answer real fast. Okay? So uh, clear your mind Clear it right out! Clear it out! Clear!
Joey: You don't think this is going to be a big break for me?
Chandler: Look Joe, I just, I just don't want to get your hopes up real high.
Chandler: Joe, I don't think this is going to be your big break.
Joey: Fine! (He slams on the brakes, stopping the car on the bridge to the sound of numerous car horns.) Get out!
Chandler: You're not actually supposed to stop on the bridge.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross, Phoebe, Rachel, and Monica are there. Ross is trying to figure out why Phoebe's mad at him.]
Rachel: Oh, did you beat him at a board game? He turns into such a baby when he starts to lose.
Chandler: Well, I don't know what mad him so mad, y'know? All I said was that uh, I didn't think this wasn't gonna be his big break, that this movie wasn't going to do anything for him, and that uh, y'know it didn't sound like a real movie--Okay, he should've pushed me off of the bridge.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is trying to apply her eye drops while Monica looks on.]
Monica: On three, 1 2 3! (Rachel turns her head on three to avoid the drops.) Now my pillow's all wet! (She was trying to fool Rachel and squeezed the eyedropper.)
Monica: I am going I'm going--Turn it over! (Rachel rolled onto her stomach and Monica rolls her back.) I'm I am going to get these drops in your eyes. (She is holding Rachel down with both hands and has the eyedropper in her mouth.)
Monica: (answers the phone) Hello? (Listens.) (To Phoebe) It's Joey. (Phoebe's proud of herself.) (To Joey) I'm so glad you called! Chandler told me what happened. Y'know he's really upset about it.
Monica: What did you do to his sweater vests?
Monica: Yeah, she's here. Hold on a second. (She hands the phone to Phoebe.)
Chandler: (who has just entered) Is that Joey? Is that Joey? Let me talk to him! I wanna talk to him!
Chandler: Y'know, he won't even talk to me. How am I going to apologize to him if he won't even talk to me?
Monica: Well, maybe you should send him something. So that when he gets to Las Vegas he'll know that you're sorry.
Ross: (entering) Okay Pheebs, I know how we're going to figure this out. Okay, clear your mind and answer the first thing that comes into your head. Okay?
[Scene: The desert outside of Las Vegas, Joey is arriving and we hear the song, Name. Y'know, (singing) I've been through the desert on a horse with no name! It felt good to be out of the rain. In the desert, you can't remember your name, 'cause there ain't no one for to give you no pain. La la la-la-la, la, la, la, la-la-la. You get the idea. Anyhoo, he pulls up and stops. As he gets out of the car, he spills a huge pill of fast food containers out of the foot well.]
Joey: Hey-hey! Stanley! Hey-hey! You're leading man is here! Let's get to work.
Stanley: It-it's probably just temporary. We're hoping to get some more money soon, so if could just uh, hang out.
(I think one of the grips walk up to Joey, mainly because there's a credit for The Grip. What the heck is a grip anyway?!)
(The rest of the crew start to drive away leaving Joey sad, alone, and holding his congratulatory balloons as the song comes up again. La-la-la. See, I've been through the desert on a horse with no name! It felt good to be out of the rain! In the desert you can't remember your name, 'cause there ain't no one for to give you no pain. La-la-la, la, la, la )
Joey: Uh, well yeah-yeah, I've got all of that going on. Yeah, listen uh, I want you to make sure you tell Chandler that he couldn't have been more wrong! Uh-oh! I gotta go Monica, my uh, my sushi's here!
[Cut to Joey hanging up the phone in Vegas. He's wearing a Roman gladiator's uniform and goes over to join a family to pose for a picture. You see, he's apparently taken a job at Caesar's Palace.]
Joey: (to the family) Sorry about that. Thanks for waitin'.
(As she moves to get it, Monica yells )
(Phoebe jumps to the floor as Ross tackles Rachel off of the couch. Chandler helps push Rachel onto the floor by jumping over the back of the couch. Phoebe grabs Rachel's head to hold it still and opens Rachel's eye as Monica jumps onto Chandler's back to administer the torture--I mean medicine.)
Monica: Okay! Okay! Okay! (She succeeds in getting the eye drops in and everyone climbs off of Rachel.) We'll see you in about 3 to 4 hours.
Rachel: Oh! (She's trying to recover while still on the floor.)
Rachel: Oh, ok, thank you. (Molly leaves) (to Monica) Do you see what all the guys see in her?
Mrs. Lynch: (starting to cry) No, Im sorry. I have to go. (She leaves as Sophie arrives.)
Rachel: Come on, this isnt funny. She thinks its my fault that you havent called her. You have to call her!
Monica: Yeah. (to Chandler) I bet you cant guess what color my tonsils are? Ill bet the apartment!
Phoebe: (scared) Fire alarm? (She opens the door to reveal a fireman holding the blanket with the smoke detector.) Oh! Hi, officerfireman, can-can I help you?
Phoebe: (To Joey) Maybe its something you ate?
JOEY: Yeah, someplace nice. (to Phoebe and Rachel) How much do you think I can get for my kidney? (at Central Perk)
Ross: I'm gonna have to give him up.
Ross: And thats Phoebe over there! (Points to her.)
Sandy: That's great! (He gets emotional again and waves his hand in front of his face in a feminine way, like trying to dry his tears) I'm sorry. It's just... such an emotional thing when you're welcomed into a new family...
Joey: He had to board.
The Croupier: Comin' out. Place your bet. (Monica does so.) Dice are out. (The woman next to Monica rolls the dice.) Double or nothin'! Pay the front line! (Monica won and doubled the chip.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler is once again being dragged in by Ross so he that he can try to manipulate the situation so that its best for Ross, not necessarily whats best for Monica and Chandler.]
Phoebe: (to the woman behind her) This place is so depressing. If I had to work here I'd kill myself. (she turns around and the clerk behind the counter heard her.) But you obviously haven't.
<Joey looks to Phoebe and she nods in agreement>
Ross: I like this one. (Points to it.) It seems to say, "I love you and thats why I have to kill you."
Ross: (to the girl sitting next to him) Hi there. How many, how many ah, did you sell?
[Scene: Rachel's bedroom, Rachel, entering selfish mode, is thanking Ross for wrongly taking the entire blame of the breakup; as if she had absolutely nothing to do with it.]
Chandler: (peeping) Everything is so distorted! Looks like Joey has a giant hand! Which says "Rangers" on it. They went to the game!
[Cut to Monica's bedroom]
JOEY: What if we have to pee?
MONICA: You've got to get back out there, it's your party.
Trudie Styler: Im told there are two sides to this story, but all Ive heard is that Bens a bit of a poo-poo head.
Mike: No, no, we're here to give the money back.
Susan: I am supposed to be the mommy?
Rachel: (Running to her room.) Hi, Pheebs.
Big Nosed Rachel: Well, you know that my parents are out of town and Chip was going to come over
Joey: Yeah, we just don't happen to know any women that know how to play poker.
Ross: Thanks you guys, I really appreciate this. All right, I'm gonna get packing again. Man, I've been moving around so much I'm beginning to feel like a nomad.
Ross: (gets up) All right. Y'know what? We dont have to go downstairs! We can bring Vegas up to us! (He grabs a deck of cards and pulls up a chair.) All right, come on, come on, we'll play some blackjack. Here we go. (Deals the cards.) 13.
(Joey walks in and looks around. He's trying to find a Mike for Phoebe)
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Shhh! Im on a call! (On phone) Umm well yeah, you can pick it up tonight, say 8:30? At-at my apartment. Its umm, its umm 5 Morton Street, Apartment 14, umm and then maybe yknow after we can grab a bite to eat or whatever. (Listens) Okay, well okay Ill see you then. (Listens) Bye. (Hangs up.)
(Joey picks up a hammer and a crowbar and gets ready to destroy the table.)
[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica is breaking the news to Alan.]
Chandler: Great! Now, we can go to the Ranger game! (Pause) Last night!
Monica: Come on Rach, when a guy says hes going to call, it doesnt mean hes going to call. Hasnt it ever happened to you?
Ross: All right, yknow what? If you are not going to learn how to ride this bike then Im sorry, Im just gonna have to take it back.
(Chandler nods along and they enter the whirlpool room and remove their robes. Only Chandler is lacking a certain item of clothing. You see this is a coed whirlpool, which means swimsuits, and in fact there are two women already there and Chandler didnt seem to wear his. Needless to say, everyone is shocked, including Chandler.)
(He goes over to hug her.)
Gary: I know, really well. In fact, I'm gonna ask Phoebe to move in with me.
Monica: When we found out that we're gonna get this baby, Chandler and I started talking and we decided that we didn't want to raise a kid in the city.
CHANDLER: I'm going to the bathroom now. [leaves for the bathroom]
Monica: Here. Ben, do you wanna play the airplane game, do you wanna show Rachel? Come here. (takes Ben) Were gonna do something fun. Okay. (throws Ben up in the air a little bit and catches him) Weee!! (moves into the living room and does it again) Weee!! (starts to walk back into the kitchen as she does it again, and hits Bens head on that wooden beam across the ceiling.)
Joey: Yeah, they said I acted too much with it. I told everybody about this! Now everybody's gonna go to the theatre, expecting to see me, and...
Ross: No wait, okay, okay, I have an idea. I want you to get on the swing, okay? And you'll see that there's nothing to be afraid of.
Rachel: I meant er, (struggling to concentrate) young, young, I meant young, young to be a doctor. Oh good, Rach.
Mr. Geller: Don't listen to your mother. You're independent, and you always have been! Even when you were a kid... and you were chubby, and you had no friends, you were just fine! And you would read alone in your room, and your puzzles...
Ross: I'm the holiday armadillo! I'm a friend of Santa's and he sent me here to wish you (Points to Ben) a Merry Christmas!
[Cut to Monica's bedroom]
Monica: Hey, what are you doing? You gotta save room, youve got almost an entire turkey to eat.
Chandler: We'll take a brief time out while Messier stops to look at some women's shoes.
(Upon hearing this, Monica starts to break down and storms out. Only to be stopped by her parents.)
Ross: Well if it doesnt matter to her, it doesnt matter to me! (to Paul) Still not yelling!
Phoebe: (laughs) Okay, quit down. (they start to kiss again)
Phoebe: All right, so, what are we supposed to call you?
Monica: Uh I really dont know what to tell you Rach, I really dont. I mean, maybe Joey can help you out with your, with your big work problem.
Ross: No, women are welcome to play.
Monica: (to Phoebe) Please, just a little bit off the back.
Monica: Aunt Syl, stop yelling! All I'm saying is that if you had told me vegetarian lasagna, I would have made vegetarian lasagna. (pauses, listens to person on phone) Well, the meat's only every third layer, maybe you could scrape.
Joey: Well Ross was hangin out over at our place, Rachel comes over to borrow some moisturiser from Chandler....
Rachel: No! No, I am not getting in a car with Ross, we will just have to live here!
(Joey gives him the okay symbol, and Ross rushes towards him to be stopped by Chandler. Meanwhile, Phoebe goes over to the snack table as some guy, which turns out to be Ursula's fianc�e Eric, walks in and smacks her butt.)
Chandler: Yeah, well. Its the right thing to do.
Phoebe: Oh Joey, weve heard the specials three times! Okay? Theres prime rib, mahi mahi, and a very special lobster ravioli. (She grabs his menu and hands it to the waiter.)
MR A: Well, I don't know what to tell you dear. The only thing I can think of is that she always used to say that before she died, she wanted to see everything.
Rachel: Well, maybe you didnt want it to end?
Joey: (starting to cry) Open the box!! (Runs over to do so.)
Joey: Okay look Rach, I know this is a lot. You dont have to say anything. You-you uh, you take as much time as you need. (Long pause as Rachel says nothing.) Okay, you gotta say something!
(Chandler leans over to fall asleep on the mans shoulder next to him, only the man catches his attempt.)
CHANDLER: I'm sorry.� I, I told you I was in Tulsa because I wanted to spend the night with Monica and I, I didn't know . . .� I didn't think you'd understand.
Rachel: (entering, excitedly) Oh! Hi you guys, oh my God! Youll never gonna believe happened to me today! I am sitting in my office and
[cut to Monica telling the gang about what happened at Petes]
CHANDLER: I was not trying them out, Susie asked me to wear them.
Mr. Franklin: But we really do need to find someone up here. The work is starting to pile up. Ive got a stack of documents on my desk this high. (Holds his hand at shoulder level.)
Ross: Okay. All right. So lets see, lets play from the trash can, to the lightpost. Right. Two hand touch, well kick off.
Chandler: By then, the cheesecake may have gone bad. We dont want her to come back to bad cheesecake.
Dream Joey: Aww, me too. Now let's finish this and go to bed.
Ross: No-no-no, Im saying we-we buy more of this (disposable cameras) at the gift shop, throw our tuxes back on, and take a few pictures. All we have to do is make sure not to get anybody elses faces.
Monica: Heres Frannie. Hmm, wont she be happy to see me? (Starts to get up and great Frannie.)
[Cut to outside Central Perk.]
Joey: All right now remember, something this big and long is going to be difficult to manuver, fortunately I have a lot of experience in that area.
Joey: Not much to tell there Im really shy.
(They hear a knocking sound coming from the hallway and go to investigate.)
Monica: Really, Rachel, I was thinking of you the whole time. Look, I'm sorry, all right. I never meant for you to find out!
Ross: I prefer not to answer that right now, Im still carrying a little holiday weight.
Monica: Well, of course I do. What's not to like! I'll take her in a minute! But, you know, I think that you're giving up too easy, honey. I think that you need to fight for her!
Ross: Right, I'm gonna go talk to Joey. I think this is the right time. He's always in a good mood after the flight attendant says "duty free".
Chandler: Hey, Ross, I just wanted to apologize... (looks at laptop screen)..don't tell me you actually made those gay pictures of me?
ROSS: Hey, save us some pizza. [they go off to Rachel's room]
Joey: Hey, listen to me, listen to me you are never ever gonna be alone. Okay? I promise thats not gonna happen.
Mark: Ahh! Fair, schmair! Y'know? Look, if you want to get back at Ross, I am here for you. Really? No-no, I say-I say, I say we get back at him right on this couch. Right here!
[Scene: A Dry Cleaners, Joey is there with Phoebe and is trying to get his picture put back amongst the other celebrities hanging on the walls.]
Rachel: Oh my god. Ok you guys, theres Danny. Watch. Just watch this. (He walks past the couch to the counter.) See?! Still pretending hes not interested. Ohh, hes coming over. Just pretend like we dont know him. Weve forgotten who he is.
Ross: Come on Pheebs, its not that bad! Yknow most people would be excited if they didnt have to work for a couple of weeks.
JOEY: C'mon show us what you bought. . . You know you want to.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next morning, Phoebe is there with her puppy and is trying to sing it to sleep as Chandler enters.]
[Scene: The Broom Closet, Ross and Susan are trying to get out.]
Joey: Yeah. Sure. (They both half stand up, Joey pulls the neck of his sweater out, and Rachel looks down it to see his T-shirt.)
Rachel: Ugh, Monica I dont want to steal your stupid thunder!
Mrs. Geller: Well, they don't have to know that... (She starts to fluff the same pillow Monica fluffed multiple times earlier.)