words in movies
Joey: Well, I started building one. But then I decided to take it to the next step.
(Chandler goes to his bedroom and opens the door. However, only the top half opens, and he trips into his bedroom over the bottom half.)
Phoebe: No, I know, Im just nervous. Y'know its just y'know Moms dead, dont talk to my sister, Grandmas been sleeping a lot lately. Its like the last desperate chance to have a family, y'know, kinda thing. Youre so sweet to wait with me.
Rachel: Well, actually Gunther sent me. Youre not allowed to have cups out here, its a thing. (takes her cup and goes back inside)
Chandler: Well, we have a deal, where we each get to pick five celebrities that we can sleep with, and the other one cant get mad.
Chandler: I know, I know, I just always wondered if I could get her eyes to pop out of her head.
Joey: Its just a game Mon. (makes a Can-you-believe-her face to the rest of the gang.) Rach, how about you?
Frank: Yeah, I was thinking that maybe we could go down to Time Square and pick up some ninja stars. And, oh, um, my friend Larry, he wants me to take a picture of a hooker.
[Scene: Chandler and Joeys, Joey is drilling a hole in the wall and the drill comes out the other side really close to Chandlers head. Chandler then rushes out to talk to Joey.]
Joey: Well, you shouldve told me that before, Im not a mind reader. Hey, were out of beer. Im going to Monicas.
Joey: Oh Monica, listen, I ah, I saw down at the hardware store, they got those designer tiles on sale. If you ever want to redo the bathroom floor.
Monica: I highly doubt that. (they both go to the bathroom)
Joey: Oh yeah. If you ah, move your hamper, you see what color the tile used to be. (Monica gasps) Yeah.
Joey: Relax. Here hold this (hands her his beer). This old stuff just comes right off. (he bends down to try and lift some tile right in the middle of the floor, in his tight pants.)
Monica: Thats a little more than I wanted to see.
Joey: (manages to pry off only a small piece) Aw! Look at that, every inch of this stuff is glued down. Itd take forever to pry this up. You should ah, you should just leave it. (starts to walk away, but Monica grabs him)
Phoebe: Yeah I know what I wanted to ask you. Um, can you roll your tongue? Because I can, and my Mom couldnt, and I thought y'know, I figured that was something I got from our Dad.
Phoebe: Yeah, yeah. You can do it to. (tries to do it, but cant)
Phoebe: Thats the same month as Halloween. So, um, what kinda things do you like to do at home?
Ross: Celebrities Im allowed to sleep with.
Chandler: All right, so who do you got it narrowed down to?
Chandler: Eh, y'know what, shes to political, she probably wouldnt let you do it, unless you donated four cans of food first.
Phoebe: Oh, well um, not right now. Y'know Im just gonna go to bed, I think the fumes are giving me a headache.
Frank: Oh, excellent. (starts to melt the fire extinguishers hose.)
Monica: Oh, we used to drive each other crazy playing the shadow game.
Chandler: Oh, just this! (turns around and has a paint lid stuck to the back of his pants.) Yknow what its my fault really, because the couch is usually where we keep the varnish.
Monica: Hes retiling my floor. (they both run to the bathroom)
Phoebe: Yeah. (phone rings and Phoebe answers it) Hello. (listens) Oh my God, I totally forgot! (listens) Well cant someone else do it. (listens) But, I have company. (listens) Yeah, no look, thats all right Ill come in. (hangs up phone) Um, Frank, Im really sorry but I have to go to work. Its-its one of my regulars and hes insisting that I do um.
Phoebe: No, no, no, I wouldnt do you myself, I mean that would be weird. Yeah, no, Ill get one of the other girls to do it. Oh, this will be so much fun! Hey! Are you excited?
Monica: Its beautiful! Its like the first bathroom floor there ever was. (Chandler tries to go to the bathroom) Whoa! Are you going in there for?
Chandler: Hi! Bye! (runs to the bathroom)
[Scene: Healing Hands Inc. (Phoebes work), Frank is being ushered in, by the arm, to the room Phoebe is in by another girl.]
Jasmine: Fine. (starts to leave, and points at Frank) I dont like you!! (leaves)
Phoebe: Whatever, its the perfect end to the perfect weekend anyways.
Frank: How-how I like to melt stuff, and how I dislike stuff that doesnt melt.
Frank: Yeah, y'know I feel like I can really talk to you cause y'know youre my sister, y'know.
Frank: Oh come on we went, we went to Time Square, we found ninja stars, I almost got arm broken by a hooker...
[Scene: Chandler and Joeys, everyone is there, helping to lift the entertainment center into place]
Chandler: Yeah, I coulda counted to three like four times without all this two talk.
Chandler: Yeah, y'know what I got a better idea. How-how bout it blocks none of mine door and a lot of yours? (throws his shoulder into the center to try and move it, but it doesnt move.)
Rachel: Okay sir, um-mm, let see if I got this right. Ah, so this is a half-caf, double tall, easy hazel nut, non-fat, no foam, with whip, extra hot latte, right? (the guy nods) Okay, great. (she starts to walk away and under her breath) You freak.
Ross: (to Gunther) Thank you.
Isabella: (to Gunther) Um, coffee to go, please.
(Ross recognises her and goes over to the couch, mouthing Oh my God
Ross: Isabella Rosselini. (points to her)
Ross: What you dont think Id go up to her?
Rachel: Ross, it took you ten years to finally admit you liked me.
Rachel: Honey, hes about to go hit on Isabella Rosselini. Im just sorry we dont got popcorn.
Ross: (to Isabella) Hi! Hi, Im Ross, you dont know me, but Im a big, big fan of yours. I mean, Blue Velvet, woo-oo hoo! Um, I was wondering if I could um, maybe buy you a cup of coffee? (Gunther hands her change) Or maybe reimburse you for that one?
Ross: Well, yeah, kinda. Um, but thats okay, see we have an understanding, um, see we each have this list of five famous people, (gets his out) so Im allowed to sleep with you. No, no, no, its flattery.
Isabella: Im sorry. (starts to leave)
Ross: (to the rest of the gang) Were just gonna be friends.
Joey: I bet ya ya I could fit in there. (points to a hole in the center)
Joey: Thank you. Cha-ching! (Chandler starts to leave) Oh, well hello Mr. Lincoln. Better luck next time buddy. (Chandler leaves and closes the door) And the drinks are on me!
Monica: Well, are you asleep right now, Joe? Cause I dont think you have to wear it unless you are!
Rachel: Yeah! You can hook it up to your TV and you get radio!
Monica: I figured out I need to charge seventeen bucks a jar just to break even. So, I've got a new plan now. Babies.
Ross: Yknow actually it does have a very interesting history. Uh, this street is the first street in the city to have an underground sewer system. (Kristen crinkles her nose at that.) Before that sewage and waste would just flow right down the street. Yeah, sometimes ankle deep! (He stops when he realizes what hes talking about.)
Mr. Geller: Oh, well, I, I guess it musta been the day after you were born. We were in the hospital room, your mother was asleep, and they brought you in and gave you to me. You were this ugly little red thing, and all of a sudden you grabbed my finger with your whole fist. And you squeezed it, so tight. And that's when I knew.
(Rachel looks all around as if all the eyes in the chapel were looking at her as the picture fades to black.)
Monica: (To Monica) Danny. Are you guys ever gonna go out again?
CHANDLER: I had sex today. I never have to answer that phone again.
Monica: (To Rachel) Oh, are the drapes still closed hon?
Gary: I want you to move in with me.
JOEY: Oh, Richard's here. I should run down say bye to him (runs out)
(Phoebe enters, walks to the couch, sits down, and begins to read a letter without saying hi.)
Mike: Look, if Phoebe wants to marry David, she should, I'm not gonna stand in the way of that and neither should you.
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Emma continues to cry.]
Rachel: Oh thank you. Hey yknow, Im so sorry to hear about you and Elizabeth.
[Cut back to the cast and Conan.]
Joey: Absolutely. But, were gonna stop by the hospital just to be sure, okay? Ill page Ross on the way. Come on.
Ross: So you gonna invite us all to the big opening?
Chandler: Okay. (Sees the living room.) You opened all the presents without me?! I thought we were supposed to do that together!
Chandler: And I love the milk! But, Im not gonna some British girl to move in with me! (Realizes that made no sense.) Joey, you say things now.
Rachel: Yes! And not because I want you to go out with me, but because I dont want you to go out with anybody! Okay? I know its a terrible thing to even think this, and its completely inappropriate, but I want you to be at my constant beck and call 24 hours a day! Im very sorry, but that is just the way that I feel.
Janice: Okay, you know, one of two things is happening here. Either you're seeing somebody behind my back, which would make you the biggest jerk on the planet. Or, else you're pretending that you're seeing somebody, which just makes you so pathetic that I could start crying right here in the cereal aisle. So like which of these two guys do you want to be? (another guy walks by)
Joey: Are you kidding me? Watch! (Makes funny faces trying to cry) Well I cant do it with you guys watching me!
Monica: (interrupting him) No-no-no, dont-dont do the accent. Youve got to see her again.
Joey: (to himself) Man, this is a long drive! Are my eyes open? No! (He opens his eyes and sees a hitchhiker.)
Phoebe: Oh, Ill get it. (goes over to the door.)
Monica: Oh no sweetie, no! This is my fault, I wasnt clear! Im really sorry. And listen, you take as much time as you need to move out okay? Theres absolutely no rush.
Phoebe: You apologize to the tree right now or I am calling for backup. (The woman calls her bluff.) (Screaming at no one in particular) Backup! Backup!!
Monica: Guys, hurry up! The flight leaves in four hours! It could take time to get a taxi! There could be traffic! The plane could leave early! When we get to London, there could be a line at customs! Come on!! (She runs back to her apartment.)
[Scene: Chandler and Eddie's apartment. Chandler is at the foosball table trying to get Phoebe to play a game with him.]
Chandler: What would you give to a kid if he wanted a ticket to play with?
Monica: (sits down) Oh good. Good, look I'm so sorry, for screwing up that cutting-her-out plan. But I have a new plan. Chandler agreed to call here in a few minutes with an emergency.
Monica: Oh yeah, of course. I'm fine it's just that(She drops the box and in a reflex action tries to catch it with her arm, the knife slips out and slowly flips through the air and comes point first down into Chandler's shoe.)
Rachel: Come on! I am here to take care of you! What do you need? Anything.
Chandler: What does a guy have to do to be taken seriously around here?!
Joey: If you want, Ill sell my friends and use the money to buy you presents.
Ross: (worried) Dude, I need to talk to you a sec.
Rachel: Ross said my name. Okay? My name. Ross said my name up there that obviously means that he still loves me! (They both just stare at her.) Okay, dont believe me, I know Im rightdo you guys want to go downstairs and get a drink?
Dr. Green: Oh? Really? Thats what my daughter means to you? Nothing?
Joey: (to Monica) Did that guy really make that joke?
Monica: I'll take it down to 95% but that's the best I can do.
Chandler: No, I invited him to dinner so you could get a chance to get to know him! I mean, if we go through a sperm bank you never meet the guy, get to check him out.
Monica: Chandler, we have talked about this. You are not supposed to give people advice! Now couldn't you just have made some sort of inappropriate joke?
Rachel: Alright, Monica, I want you to have the first taste.
Rachel: (She takes the T-shirt out of the box and holds it to her chest and take a deep breath.) No. Nothing. (She smiles and goes into her room.)
Rachel: Well, we were going to do that afterI mean umm, next.
The Producer: Im sorry, why dont we do that right now? Hes right here. (Points to a guy.)
Alice: Weve been trying to get pregnant, uh pretty much ever since we got engaged, we thought wed get a jump on things, yknow no ones getting any younger.
Phoebe: Oh, I don't make them a lot because I don't think it's fair to the other cookies
Joey: Hey, what happened to your fancy chefs jacket? (sees theres a burn spot on it)
Joey: Okay. Thats good. Okay, that give you a couple hours to prepare what youre gonna say. Good. Yeah. (Someone comes out of his apartment and it startles Joey again.) Dont you people ever knock?!
[They sit up, moaning in excitement, and Cheryl straddles Ross. Ross finds a slice of bologna and moans higher and louder, then a bag of potato chips on the coffee table starts to move. Ross throws Cheryl off his lap, grabs a tennis racket and a toilet brush and starts pounding the bag.]
(Monica and Mike start to play ping pong. Mike scores)
CHANDLER: Do you remember talking to me yesterday?
JOEY: Alright look, that's it. I don't think we should see each other anymore, alright. Look, I know I should have told you this a long time ago but I am not Drake Remore, OK. I'm not even a doctor, I'm an actor. I just pretend to be a doctor.
Joey: Yknow, we dont have to imagine.
Paul: How to make the next one even shorter?
Chandler: I know, I, I should have talked to you first about it.
Phoebe: Ohh!! God! (Gary enters and she sees him) Ooh! (To Chandler) Get out of here, good for nothing.
Chandler: He didnt say anything about that to me.
Ross: (entering) Look, I really need some help, okay? Why? Why did I have to speak in a British accent?! What do I do?
Phoebe: Hey, are you going to find out the sex of the baby?
Monica: Oh wait, wait, unless you happened to catch the Reruns' production of Pinocchio, at the little theater in the park.
Hold Voice: Please stay on the line. Youre call is very important to us.
(Monica walks down to Erica's legs to watch the birth.)
Monica: Okay. (They kiss.) Okay, I cant wait! This is going to be the best Valentines Day ever! (Chandler giggles and exits.) I cant believe it! Make the presents! Make the presents!
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone but Phoebe are there reading. Rachel is sitting on the couch flanked by Ross and Monica. She suddenly stops reading and starts blinking her left eye as if it's bothering her. The problem is that Joey is on her left and thinks she's winking at him and winks back. Ross is watching this and isn't quite sure of what to make of it.]
(She storms into his apartment to find him with a towel around his shoulders, a bowl on his head, and Phoebe with scissors in her hand.)
Rachel: Oh yeah, Joey broke it. Had to get rid of it.
Rachel: (To Dina) Really? (Nods her head at Bobby.)
Melissa: Oh, I was gonna talk to him about doing something tonight.
ROSS: (standing up) Uh, I like to, uh, to add something to that...
Roger: I dunno. Maybe you wanted your marriage to fail.
Ross: Anyway, I figured after work I'd go pick up a bottle of wine, go over there and, uh, try to woo her.
Joey: Really? It sounds exactly the same to me.
Rachel: Yeah, we wanted to throw you a big surprise and a great shower, and now you dont have either.
Chandler: Nah, not so much. Alright, now we smoke. (Takes a puff.) Oh.. my.. God. (He continues to smoke.)
Chandler: You are not going to believe what I did today!
(Chandler enters and sees what they're watching, panics, and runs to turn off the TV.)
Monica: Fine. (Starts to walk away then she runs over and grabs an orange before she exits.) Go! Go! Go!
Chandler: You know, I'd love to, but I'm a little tired.
Rachel: Jill, honey, I think this is the best thing that couldve ever happened to you. I mean you needed to get out on your own anyway! And you know when I did it, I-I-I at first I was scared, and look at me now! Im the only daughter dad is proud of! Okay, well this is, this is what youre gonna do. Youre gonna get a job, youre gonna get an apartment, and then Ill help you and you can stay with us. Right Pheebs, she can stay with us?
Phoebe: Yeah, I-I cantI mean yknow I was trying to be really y'know okay and upbeat about it, I justI feel so dwarfed by your musical gift. I
Janice: I don't know what to say... I mean, you know, obviously we have this... heat between us.
(Steve goes over to look at Ross who's trying to look cool, but has some frosting on his lip.)
[cut to Joey as Estelle, Joeys agent, approaches]
Chandler: That's right! I do! And I'm your man. And I'm going to get us through this situation even if it means you working twice as hard.
Rachel: She wants to move in with me and Ross to help take care of the baby.
Monica: It is not over because she is going to call you and tell you she loves you. And the reason why she couldnt, is because her feelings were so strong, it scared her. Now you go home and wait for her call, she could be calling you from the plane! Come on now go! Go! (Tries to push Ross out the door.)
Monica: Pretty much. (to Joey) So, what do you, what do you think of the floor?
Chandler: Oh, the duck seems to think that Monica got me garbage! Hmm, I wonder what I could get Monica thats as good as garbage?
Ross: That guy Mark. From Bloomingdale's... She thinks he's just being nice to her. But I know he really wants to sleep with her.
<Ross and Rachel are putting baby stuff together like they're going to be going somewhere.>
Phoebe: Okay, we're gonna take a short break. (Goes over to their table)
Rachel: Oh, its so easy for you I mean, youre not married, you get to have sex with who ever you want!
Rachel: (laughs) Wow! Umm, yknow, I-I would really love to, but I-I shouldnt.
[Cut to inside. Monica, Joey and Phoebe are singing while outside, Ross and Rachel are trying to get the cat off of Ross' shoulder.]
Rachel: I know. (Starts to cry) Yeah, see, theres so much to do and I have so little time to do it in.
Phoebe: Im really glad you guys are okay but, I just keep thinking what would happen if-if you two (Points to Monica and Joey) actually had hooked up.
Mrs. Bing: Dont you have a little too much penis to be wearing a dress like that?