words in movies
[Scene: Monicas Restaurant Kitchen, she is frantically working and is handing two finished dishes to a waitress.]
(Phoebe turns to leave but notices an attractive man.)
Phoebe: (To him) Oh, well hello there.
Phoebe: (To Monica) I didnt see this on the menu.
Monica: All right, all right! Lets just cut to the chase, okay? (To Phoebe) Youre single. (To Tim) Youre single. (To Phoebe) He gets off work at eleven. (To Tim) Shell be waiting for your call. (To Phoebe) Ill give him your number if I can get one calamari and one Caesar salad!! (Everyone in the kitchen stops.) I did not yell. I am not putting a dollar in the jar.
Chandler: Hey thats okay. So, where do you want to go?
Ross: Oh ah, I think you know where I want to go.
(They go out to the elevators.)
Chandler: Oh its been going on way to long now. Yknow, I mean the first time he said it we were just passing each other in the hallway, so I didnt say anything. And then the next time he said, "Hey Toby, do you want a donut?" And I-I wanted a donut. And now its five years later, the donuts gone and Im still Toby.
Ross: Five years?! Chandler you have to tell him!
Joey's Co-Star: We would, but when we went to exhume Jessicas body, it was gone.
Joey: (To Rachel) Okay, let me just get changed and we can go to dinner.
Rachel: Well dontWhat happened to Jessicas body?!
Joey: Im not telling, youll have to see it on TV!
Rachel: Oh! (Motions to Joeys co-star.)
Joey: (grabbing her) Here we go! Here we go! (Starts to pull her away from Kash.)
Rachel: Say hi to Wally.
Phoebe: Oh my God! I had the best time with Tim last night. He is so sweet! Oh, I cant wait to get sous-neath him.
Monica: I I have to fire him.
Phoebe: Well maybe he was just nervous, yknow you can be very intimidating. And besides Ive met your pastry chef and she can stand to be taken down a peg or two.
Monica: I paid to have this done.
Rachel: Okay, you go do it! Ill come back to that set! Ill meet more actors! Ill meet em all!
Mr. Franklin: What do you think of adding him to our team?
Mr. Franklin: But we really do need to find someone up here. The work is starting to pile up. Ive got a stack of documents on my desk this high. (Holds his hand at shoulder level.)
Chandler: What does a guy have to do to be taken seriously around here?!
Monica: Hey. Okay, I gave him another chance, but Tim has got to go!
Monica: No! No-no! He is totally incompetent. I called the chef who recommended him to me. He said, "Ha-ha! Gotcha!"
Monica: What? So now Im not allowed to fire him?
Monica: Okay well, then well both do it today and hell just have to deal with it!
Monica: I wanted to do this days ago so I think I should go first.
Bob: I just had a meeting, I was actually hoping to get transferred up here, but I just found out its not gonna happen. Apparently somebody thinks Im not eleventh floor material. Say uh, who the hell is this Chandler?
Ross: So, what do you want to do tonight? Theres a Ukrainian film at the Angelica thats supposed to be very powerful. Interested?
Joey: Hey! Im an (does the quote-marks thing as well) actor too! Im not sure. I think theyre taking the ferry out to some Italian place on Staten Island.
Kash: Hey Rachel! You ready to go?
Tim: Whoops. Sorry. (Looking at it, like a newscaster) This just in. (Phoebe fake laughs.) Oh, its 9-1-1 from the restaurant, that means Monica needs me right away. (Starts to leave.)
Tim: Awww, Ill miss you too Pheebs. (Starts to leave) And I will be holding you, right here. (Holds his hands over his heart, blows a kiss to Phoebe who catches it, and then leaves and Phoebe throws the kiss back.)
Joey: So what movie do you want to seeAnd not another one I have to read. Okay? I get enough of that from books.
Joey: And just wait for Rachel to come back from her date?
Ross: Hey, if thats what you want to do Im not gonna say no.
Ross: I just I have to find out how it went.
Ross: Its just I always thought when I had another kid it would be different. Now I-I love Ben, but every time I have to drop him off at Carol and Susans, its likeIt breaks my heart a little. I mean Ive always had this picture of me and my next wife in bed on Sunday and, my kid comes running in and leaps up onto the bed. And we all read the paper together. Yknow? Maybe fight over the science section.
Ross: It used to be. Now she doesnt really have a face. Smokin body though.
Ross: No, its not what I want either. I mean I-I cant force myself to fall in love with her again now.
[Scene: Outside Chandlers Office, Chandler is just about to go into his office when Bob calls for him from behind.]
Bob: I want to talk to that bastard, see what his problem is.
Tim: Wow! Umm, okay. Umm (To Phoebe) I-I-I realize I came on a little strong but, its only because I think youre so amazing. (To Monica) And uh, I-I just wanna, I just wanna tell you how much I appreciate you giving me an opportunity here because Iyoure the most talented chef Ive ever worked for. Anyway (Starts to leave and Phoebe and Monica trade looks.)
(He kisses her on the cheek and heads to Central Perk.)
(Ross continues to talk to her as the camera pans to show Rachel standing in the doorway.)
(Rachel watches that and slowly backs out to head for home.)
Dedicated to the Memory of Richard L. Cox, Sr.
(He thinks about it and decides to join in by turning over a chair and continue ransacking the place.)
Monica: (looking very serious) I need to talk to you.
Joey: your right! I love my life! (He gets up to go and speak to the girl and he turns back and sits down) I actually did sleep with her.
Phoebe: Great, okay, what are you gonna change it to?
Ross: What a weird way to kick me when Im down.
Monica: Joey, I left my watch on the counter last night. (Goes to the counter) It was right here, where is it?
Monica: Okay, just back off mister! Whoa. (Pause) Cause I am ready to have a baby. I just want Joey to be the father.
Rachel: Well, Chandler, youre gonna have to tell him.
Rachel: Well, then I get to give him the cell phone.
Phoebe: We were at the game, and this guy proposed to his girlfriend on the big screen thing...
Receptionist: Well, heres a schedule of whats coming up. (Hands it to him.)
Rachel: Okay great, hold on a sec! (She runs to her room and returns carrying a huge bag of laundry.) Oh, here you go! You don't mind do ya? That would really help me out a lot! Thanks!
Rachel: Joey, you cant let him get away with that. Ya know what, Im not going to let him get away with that. Im going to say something to himNo, I really shouldnt say anythingNo, I should say something to him. (Goes to the counter) Gunther, I want you to give Joey his job back. That is really not fair that you have to fire him
Chandler: Honey, it is not a date! I havent talked to her in ten years! You cant just call up somebody you havent talked to in ten years and ask them for a favor. There are rules, yknow? You gotta, you got to put in some time.
Phoebe: Oh, well what are you doing here? Are you about to do it? (Gasps) Is it Gunther?
Chandler: All right. I will go out and I will try to find something for her, okay?
Ross: (To Rachel) I wasnt talking to you.
Ross: Why...Why should I? I mean if she wants to move on, that's fine!
SUSIE: Um, so listen, how many times am I gonna have to touch you on the arm before you ask me on a date.
Ross: Did you tell your sister to ask me out?
Phoebe: Wow! See, and I didn't think you'd be able to come up with anything.
ROSS: No, you, ya know there's no need to make it u. . . how?
Joey: Oh Monica, listen, I ah, I saw down at the hardware store, they got those designer tiles on sale. If you ever want to redo the bathroom floor.
Monica: (to Ross) Let me get you some coffee.
Monica: (To Erica) Oh my God, he's beautiful. Thank you so much.
Joey: (pointing to the TV) Okay, Ross, look-look-look-look, look right here. Thats called a scrum, okay? Its kinda like a huddle.
Joey: Aww, I don't want to see that!
Mr. Treeger: Yeah, it happened to me once. I was just flipping through the channels and bam! It was like finding money.
Joey: No way! I've been going to the guy for 12 years.
Ross: No, I barely even got to three Mississippi.
Monica: Thanks. (Goes to fetch him.)
Phoebe: Hi! (turns back to Chandler, then to Monica) Oh, yeah, no, I know. You're a chef. I know, and I thought of you first, but um, Chandler's the one who needs a job right now, so....
Phoebe: (running out) Wait! Wait! Hi! Listen, Ross can I just talk to you for just a second?
Joey: (Looking around) Uhh do you happen to have a hot girl in there?
Rachel: Okay. (Grabs the blender and starts to drink.)
Joey's Hand Twin: Please, please take him too. (Motions to Joey.)
Chandler: I'd keep an eye on him! We have to find out which one the father is.
Mike: OK, I don't want to freak you out or anything, but I think I just saw a rat in your cupboard.
Rachel: Ok, well this is like that...in no way. I had a...I had a dream last night that I wanted to kiss Joey.
Monica: I just tell her, I have to get it over with. I told Ross and Phoebe and shes the only one left!
Rachel: Yeah! Its weird. But the thing is need to find a date.
(Rachel comes back to the gate.)
Phoebe: Okay, dont give me a reason to get mad, okay
(Rachel, Ross and Ross go to the bathroom)
Rachel: Okay. Honey, I would love for you to go with me. (Ross has a worried look on his face) What?
[Cut to Monica's bedroom, Chandler is trying to listen through the door.]
Ross: Fine! Its your life! (Starts to storm out mad about his failed attempt at the manipulation of his best friend and sister, but stops and tries one last time.) I just dont want to see you guys break up! Which you will do if you move in together, (Monica and Chandler just stare at him.) but thats what you want, theres nothing I can do. (Opens the door and tries one more time.) DONT DO IT!!!!! (Finally leaves.)
Bonnie: (getting up and leaving) (to Ross) Okay, Ill see you in our room.
Monica: I dont want things to change! Do you?
Chandler: I know you probably dont want to go out with me, yknow because I make too many jokes and Ive never been in a serious relationship and I guess Im not technically a "doctor "
Monica: See, this is why I told you never get involved with your assistant! And here is no such thing as keeping secrets when it comes to affairs. (To Chandler) Did you hear that Chandler? No such thing!
Joey: All right, turn around, I got to get a look at this thing.
Chandler: Oh, dont thank me, thank the jerk that never showed up. Okay, I gotta get to get to work.
Frank: Yeah, y'know I feel like I can really talk to you cause y'know youre my sister, y'know.
Rachel: Oh, good, good! We had this idea to make a birthday video for Emma and we'll give it to her when she is 18.
Rachel: (in disbelief) You WHAT? And I missed it? Because I was giving a makeover to that stupid hippie?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's Apartment, everyone's there; Phoebe recites the last verse of a poem to Joey. This poem is known as "The Night Before Christmas" by Clement Clarke Moore, but it seems that it's rather "Account of a visit from St. Nicholas" by Henry Livingston.]
Monica: Yeah sure, nature called, she wanted to see who else did.
Chandler: But I didn't get to shake my belly like a bowl full of jelly.
Chandler: Oh, uhm... I have to work too. Yeah, I'm stuck at the office all day.
Mrs. Green: No. Sweetie, youre gonna be fine. (Starts to get up.)
Rachel: (To Ross) Fine! (To the salesman) We went out.
Phoebe: (entering from Rachel's room, wearing a huge bow to cover the stain) Okay, I'm ready.
Phoebe: Oh yeah well, Im sorry about that too, but what are you going to do?
Rachel: (breaking up) Were just really very excited about this charity event that we have to go to.
Phoebe: Me taking care of you is no problem, huh? You guys feel safe. Right? Okay, Im gonna take that spit bubble as, "Yeah, I do!" Okay, after I get rid of this dirty diaper Leslie, Ill set you up with a clean one. (She throws it at the garbage without looking, misses, and knocks over a vase and flowers, which fall to the floor and break.) Okay, Im sorry. I didnt mean to scare you. I just have to clean that up. Okay? Cause lets face it, were at Monicas. (She crawls over, disposes of the diaper, picks up the flowers, and the vase.) I broke it. All right. Well, thats just the way that goes. (She throws out both the flowers and the vase.) Okay, good. (She turns around and only counts two babies.) Why are there only two of you? Where is Leslie? Well, you cant answer. (She starts looking for her) Leslie? Where are you Leslie? Leslie, now would be a good time for your first words! (She turns around and finds that Leslie has managed to crawl into the bottom drawer of the TV cabinet.) Well, look at you! Hey! You are a little bit mischievous! My gosh! (She picks her up and notices a surprise is waiting in the drawer.) Oh, youre a lot mischievous! Well, itll dry. (Closes the drawer with her foot.) (To Leslie) Okay, you sit with your brother and sister nowwho arent there! (They both have disappeared as well.)
Ross: (to his hands) Way to go guys. Yknow, you-you were really good at the stuff too.
Chandler: See my friend-my friend, Rachel, she wants to be set up.
Phoebe: Yep! Okay, gotta go, talk to you later.
Monica: Yes there is! He's black and white and shaggy and [Cut to Monicas apartment] he's sitting next to Rachel and licking Rachel's hand.
Ross: No Phoebe, dont look! You dont want to see whats under there!!
Joey: Oh yeah, sure, that makes sense. Yeah. Cause you already told her you love her and she didnt say it back, then she called you and told you that theres another guy, so yeah, go to London thatll scare her!
RACHEL: Now I'm mommy in this little play? Alright look, I refuse to get sucked into this like, weird little Geller dimension thing OK. So I'm gonna go and take a nice long hot bubble bath because you kids are driving me crazy. [goes in the bathroom]
Phoebe: Ohh, you are so lucky! (To Chandler) Hey! So, where's Monica? Did you guys make up?
Donny: O-kay... Henrietta, you didn't get all the points you needed, so that means Gene, you are going to the winners circle to try for ten thousand dollars! (Gene is clapping his hands looking very happy and so is Joey) And you're gonna be going there with Joey Tribbiani (Both of their smiles fade away instantly)
Joey: Soon, soon, I'm gonna be on soon. There I am! (Points to the screen, of course it isn't him.)
Joeys Sister: Excuse yourself, and go to the bathroom.
Phoebe: Oh! Get off!! Ow!! Oh, stop it!! Why?! Why are you doing that to me?!
Joey: Would you guys want to come down tomorrow and watch me tape the show?
Chandler: No, just the months you actually want to live here.
Ross: So Rachel called. Wants to see me. Going over in a minute.
Rachel: No-no-no! No-no-no! Please Ross, I cant! I cant do it! (Starts to freak out.) Its just gonna freak me out!!!
Phoebe: Umm, okay I would like to talk to you about your toner needs.
Ross: (to Elizabeth) And that is why we cannot see each other anymore.
ROSS: Ah?� (Mike nods.� Another pause.)� Well, he and I would probably have a lot to talk about.
[Scene: Carol and Susans, there is a knock on the door and Carol opens it to reveal Rachel.]
(He goes into his room and closes the door. Rachel goes to pick it up and )
(Chandler turns to Mike and gives him a "See what I mean?" look)
Robin: No-no, its ooozing, oozing. (to Rachel) Could you pass me the cream? Is there anyOh, theres the cream.
Chandler: Y'know, I forgot the combination to this about a year ago? I just carry it around. Do you have any Chap Stick?
Phoebe: Yeah... ooh... wow... Even started to think I'd never meet someone that, you know, I wanted to... do this with. Here you go. (Both Phoebe and Mike look really proud.)
Rachel: I a not gonna lie to you, I'm pretty sick
Chandler: Ooh, let me talk to him!
Rachel: I mean what if this keeps happening? Y'know, they'll-they'll be outside smoking, making all the decisions and I'll just be up in my office breathing my stupid clean air, y'know? And then when the day comes when Kim wants to promote one of us, who do you think she's gonna pick? Me or Smokey Smokerson?
Gary: Wait! Hold on! (He goes over to Phoebe and gives her a kiss.) (To Phoebe) Hi!
Rachel: (to the driver) Okay, stop-stop! Phoebe?!
The Cute Guy: Wow! Uh, this is kind of embarrassing. I was actually coming over to talk to your friend.
Cailin: (to Ross) Hi! Remember me?
Chandler: So uh, man, are you gonna go to the play with me tonight?
Mike: Yeah, I understand, but before you do, she really needs to hear this.
Mike: I'm sorry too. And just to be clear, I didn't hit his mother with a car.