words in movies
[Scene: Monicas Restaurant Kitchen, she is frantically working and is handing two finished dishes to a waitress.]
(Phoebe turns to leave but notices an attractive man.)
Phoebe: (To him) Oh, well hello there.
Phoebe: (To Monica) I didnt see this on the menu.
Monica: All right, all right! Lets just cut to the chase, okay? (To Phoebe) Youre single. (To Tim) Youre single. (To Phoebe) He gets off work at eleven. (To Tim) Shell be waiting for your call. (To Phoebe) Ill give him your number if I can get one calamari and one Caesar salad!! (Everyone in the kitchen stops.) I did not yell. I am not putting a dollar in the jar.
Chandler: Hey thats okay. So, where do you want to go?
Ross: Oh ah, I think you know where I want to go.
(They go out to the elevators.)
Chandler: Oh its been going on way to long now. Yknow, I mean the first time he said it we were just passing each other in the hallway, so I didnt say anything. And then the next time he said, "Hey Toby, do you want a donut?" And I-I wanted a donut. And now its five years later, the donuts gone and Im still Toby.
Ross: Five years?! Chandler you have to tell him!
Joey's Co-Star: We would, but when we went to exhume Jessicas body, it was gone.
Joey: (To Rachel) Okay, let me just get changed and we can go to dinner.
Rachel: Well dontWhat happened to Jessicas body?!
Joey: Im not telling, youll have to see it on TV!
Rachel: Oh! (Motions to Joeys co-star.)
Joey: (grabbing her) Here we go! Here we go! (Starts to pull her away from Kash.)
Rachel: Say hi to Wally.
Phoebe: Oh my God! I had the best time with Tim last night. He is so sweet! Oh, I cant wait to get sous-neath him.
Monica: I I have to fire him.
Phoebe: Well maybe he was just nervous, yknow you can be very intimidating. And besides Ive met your pastry chef and she can stand to be taken down a peg or two.
Monica: I paid to have this done.
Rachel: Okay, you go do it! Ill come back to that set! Ill meet more actors! Ill meet em all!
Mr. Franklin: What do you think of adding him to our team?
Mr. Franklin: But we really do need to find someone up here. The work is starting to pile up. Ive got a stack of documents on my desk this high. (Holds his hand at shoulder level.)
Chandler: What does a guy have to do to be taken seriously around here?!
Monica: Hey. Okay, I gave him another chance, but Tim has got to go!
Monica: No! No-no! He is totally incompetent. I called the chef who recommended him to me. He said, "Ha-ha! Gotcha!"
Monica: What? So now Im not allowed to fire him?
Monica: Okay well, then well both do it today and hell just have to deal with it!
Monica: I wanted to do this days ago so I think I should go first.
Bob: I just had a meeting, I was actually hoping to get transferred up here, but I just found out its not gonna happen. Apparently somebody thinks Im not eleventh floor material. Say uh, who the hell is this Chandler?
Ross: So, what do you want to do tonight? Theres a Ukrainian film at the Angelica thats supposed to be very powerful. Interested?
Joey: Hey! Im an (does the quote-marks thing as well) actor too! Im not sure. I think theyre taking the ferry out to some Italian place on Staten Island.
Kash: Hey Rachel! You ready to go?
Tim: Whoops. Sorry. (Looking at it, like a newscaster) This just in. (Phoebe fake laughs.) Oh, its 9-1-1 from the restaurant, that means Monica needs me right away. (Starts to leave.)
Tim: Awww, Ill miss you too Pheebs. (Starts to leave) And I will be holding you, right here. (Holds his hands over his heart, blows a kiss to Phoebe who catches it, and then leaves and Phoebe throws the kiss back.)
Joey: So what movie do you want to seeAnd not another one I have to read. Okay? I get enough of that from books.
Joey: And just wait for Rachel to come back from her date?
Ross: Hey, if thats what you want to do Im not gonna say no.
Ross: I just I have to find out how it went.
Ross: Its just I always thought when I had another kid it would be different. Now I-I love Ben, but every time I have to drop him off at Carol and Susans, its likeIt breaks my heart a little. I mean Ive always had this picture of me and my next wife in bed on Sunday and, my kid comes running in and leaps up onto the bed. And we all read the paper together. Yknow? Maybe fight over the science section.
Ross: It used to be. Now she doesnt really have a face. Smokin body though.
Ross: No, its not what I want either. I mean I-I cant force myself to fall in love with her again now.
[Scene: Outside Chandlers Office, Chandler is just about to go into his office when Bob calls for him from behind.]
Bob: I want to talk to that bastard, see what his problem is.
Tim: Wow! Umm, okay. Umm (To Phoebe) I-I-I realize I came on a little strong but, its only because I think youre so amazing. (To Monica) And uh, I-I just wanna, I just wanna tell you how much I appreciate you giving me an opportunity here because Iyoure the most talented chef Ive ever worked for. Anyway (Starts to leave and Phoebe and Monica trade looks.)
(He kisses her on the cheek and heads to Central Perk.)
(Ross continues to talk to her as the camera pans to show Rachel standing in the doorway.)
(Rachel watches that and slowly backs out to head for home.)
Dedicated to the Memory of Richard L. Cox, Sr.
(He thinks about it and decides to join in by turning over a chair and continue ransacking the place.)
Monica: Oh my God! Oh my God! (She frantically tries to clean up the bedroom as Richard starts the tour.)
Joey: Why not? Youll feel better! Ill feel better, and you know you want to. I can see it in your eyes.
Amy turns around to Phoebe: Emma, Ross wants you.
Amy turns to Ross and Rachel: Why does she keep making that noise?
Mr. Geller: I think I accidentally used Monicas boxes to keep the water away from the Porsche.
Phoebe: (her mobile phone rings) Oh, it's my wedding planner. She's driving me crazy! (she answers) Hello... Hey, ok, stop screaming! Ok? So, halibut. All right, so salmon, either way. I don't-I don't... it doesn't matter to me!
Joey: And-and theres no danger to her and the baby?
Phoebe: Thank you. (Starts to exit.)
(Joey starts to leave, but stops.)
Phoebe: Maybe because you never listen to anything that I say. I talk about her all the time! DENISE!!!!!
Monica: Umm, wait! Do you want to set the mood a little?
Ross first has a look of 'huh' then changes it to sarcastic happy: Thank you Amy.
(He throws down his plate and runs to the wine cellar, Monica is about to follow him but is intercepted by Rachel.)
ROSS: Alright, that's it. I've had enough of this, alright. Gunther, these guys are trying to take our seat.
Phoebe: Yeah. But Sergei said it took the Germans six weeks to get all the way across it.
Monica: (runs over to her) I tried to reach you at work. Theres....been a fire.
Phoebe: Joseph! (to waiter) Thou needn�t worry, they shan�t be long.
(He starts to exit, but Chandler tries to stop him by climbing on his back and grabbing hold of the foosball table.)
[Cut to later in that episode. Monica and Chandler are confronting Joey in his apartment about Phoebes knowledge.]
Ross: (To Rachel) Squeeze your legs together and cover the babys ears!
Joey: (lying on a beach towel, recapping what happened in the last episode) Okay, so we went to the beach, because Phoebe found out about this lady who knew her mom and dad, and I dont really know what happened with that.
(Ross shrugs his shoulders to Rachel and Sick Bastard closes the screen all the way.)
Paul: Nope! That never happened to me!
[cut to outside of Central Perk]
Chandler: I can't believe you'd want us to raise Emma.
Ross: My nana used to do it. That's how she paid for all my dancekarate lessons.
Joey: I bet we could get videos of all the sites, get a VCR in our hotel room... we'd never even have to go outside!
Ross: This is my son having lunch, ok? It's gonna happen a lot, so you'd better get used to it. Now if you have any problem with it, if you're uncomfortable, just ask questions. Carol's fine with it, now come on.
Chandler: Oh, Ross, when you make out card; be sure to make it out to, EM-I-LY.
Monica: Yknow I used to go out with this guy that was a really light sleeper, and whenever I started to snore, he would just roll me over
Rachel: Well, how can you be a tour guide, dont you have to be a dinosaur expert or something?
(Dr. Long hands her to Rachel.)
Joey: No they cant! They were stupid enough to get knocked up!
Phoebe: Yeah! (She hands the phone to Chandler.)
Rachel: Here. (Hands her to Monica.)
Ben: Auntie Monica!! (He runs to hug her.)
Rachel: Well what are we going to do?
Ross: Okay, 'you' can't, or (Points to Chandler) you can't? (Chandler grabs his finger) Okay, that's my finger. (Chandler twists it and Ross goes down on one knee) That's, that's my knee. (To Central Perk) Still doing the play. Aaah!
Chandler: (entering) Hey Phoebe! (To Rachel) Fatty!
Chandler: What?! Its not right! Were not ready to have a kid now!!
Monica: No, Ive had second thoughts about that. Do you realize how hard that would be to clean?
Chandler: And if not, we got to do it on a bucket.
Joey: Uh, Entertainment Tonight. [Cut to Chandler] Yeah, okay so, good talking to ya and don't come out here. All right. (Hangs up the phone and poses for that picture.)
Rachel: What the hell is that?!! (to Monica) What the hell is that? Is that you? (Monica nods her head no, and Rachel realizes what is making that sound.) Ohhhhhhh! (storms over to Chandler and Joeys with Monica in trail.)
Phoebe: Oh, look look look. The last candle's about to burn out. 10, 9, 8, 7... (time lapse)... negative 46, negative 47, negative 48.... (someone blows it out, the room gets completely dark)
Phoebe: No, you don't! She's going to Paris! She is going to meet somebody. Do you know how many hot guys there are in Paris? It's... It's a city of Gunthers!
Joey: All right! Now hey, I need to use the bathroom. Since I dont need any assistance in there, take a break!
Ross: It is time for you to give your maid of honor speech.
Chandler: Made a few calls, pulled some strings, and they agreed to seat us at 11:30 if we both had the chicken and didn't get desert.
[Fade to black.]
Ross: Hey Joey. (To Rachel) Hey you.
Phoebe: you know maybe this is a wake up call, about your whole dating attitude. Your in your thirty's and you've never had a serious relationship and you have never been in a long term relationship, here you go from woman to woman, meaningless experience to meaningless experience never even worrying that it doesn't tern into anything serious.
Rachel: I know, I still need to talk to you.
Phoebe: (sings) Raindrops on roses and rabbits and kittens, (Rachel and Monica turn to look at her.) bluebells and sleighbells and- something with mittens... La la la la...something and noodles with string. These are a few...
Rachel: Look I know she's a little tough to take. She has no where else to go, and she's my sister. Alright, she's Emma's aunt. And I would like them to bond.
Rachel: (thinks about it for a second) No! Ross, come on! No! Listen, look I thought a lot about how to tell you this and the bottom line, Ross, is we can not stay married.
Rachel: Well-well you can give them to me! I havent felt my feet in years!
Amy: <points to Chandler> This guy? Seriously?
Joey: Oh God, what the hell am I going to tell him?
Joey's Doctor: Would you like to see them? (He hands Joey a little jar.)
Ross: You know, Barracuda was the first song I learned to play on the keyboard.
Phoebe: Yeah, yeah, Im going to be out there spreading joy to the people. I mean, last year, I spread a little joy but not really enough. So this year, Im going to do the whole city.
Monica: (moving over to the couch) Still smoking cigars?
(Ross turns to look at Joey.)
[Scene: The Lobby, Ross is eating a sandwich as Phoebe rushes up to him.]
Phoebe: Why?! You two are so meant to be together, everybody thinks so.
Monica: Phoebe, can I talk to you for a second?
Rachel: Oh gosh, she's going to kill me.
Joey: (To God) Are you kidding me?!
Chandler: You wanna talk about people's feelings? You should have heard how hurt professor Stern was yesterday when I told him I wouldn't be able to go with him to Key West!
Monica: I know that switch does something, okay? So-so I went down to city hall and got these. All I had to do was pay $25 and wait in line for three hours.
Monica: Chandler! I have to tell you, you smell so smokey I have to get up. I'm not kidding. (She's not; she stands and walks away. Chandler moves closer.)
Monica: Yeah, were trying to get pregnant.
Chandler: No, I just always see guys doing this when they get handcuffs taken off them. (He runs over to where his pants are hanging) Hello sweet pants!
Dr. Leedbetter: Threatening letters, refusal to meet deadlines, apparently people now call you mental.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is teaching Richard how to make lasagne.]
Joey: (trying not to laugh) That means a lot to me man. (Exits.)
Rachel: Hey. I need to tell you something.
Rachel: (sitting at a table with some of her friends) (to waitress) Oh, um, no, no, no, no excuse me, hello. Hi. My friend ordered an onion, not an olive, and uh I ordered a rum and Diet Coke, which I dont think this is.
Rachel: Joey proposed to me.
Chandler: Joey, you have to tell her whats going on! And what did it look like?!
Monica:: he has to work, there's some rush on the big (pause, thinks) ah damn it one of these days I'm really gonna have to start listening when he talks about his job.
Joey: Its kind of embarrassing, yknow. I mean, I was an actor and now Im a waiter. Its supposed to go in the other direction.
Ross: Joey proposed to you?
Monica: So Rach! Youre the first guest at Hotel Monica! Umm, youll just have to tell me how you like your eggs in the morning. And I thought I would bring them to you, yknow, in bed. Oh, you have been through so much.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is going up to the counter.]
Rachel: Ahh, yes, I will have a glass of the Merlot and uh, (points to Rosss seat.) he will have a white wine spritzer. Woo! (Looks out the window.) Hey, look at that, the airports moving. (Realizes that thats not how it works.) Hey, are we moving?! Are we moving? Why are we moving? Hey, time-out, umm, yeah, does the captain know that were moving? (Sits back in defeat.) Oh my God. Oh, my gosh.
Rachel: You were gonna propose to me?
Joey: Wait! Terry! WaitLookWait I-I Look, Im really sorry about before. I was an idiot thinking Im too big to audition for you. You gotta give me another chance.
Ross: (on phone) Yeah, hi, I was just beeped. (pause) No, Andr� is not here. (to Joey) Third time today. (on phone) Yes, I'm sure... No, sir. I don't perform those kind of services.
Rachel: I want me to stay too.
Ross: To be fair, he doesnt seem to be impersonating Fonzie
Phoebe: I cant believe I still dont know what happened to the window in the attic!
Joey: Okay. Hey uh, when do I get to meet the robot?
Ross: So you said yes to him, and you just had our baby?
[Scene: The Dry Cleaners, Joey and Phoebe are entering to see if his picture is on the wall.]
Joey: Yeah, and there wont be a relationship left to rebuild.
(They all go down the stairs, but Ross turns around, looking like his in a coma. The others also turns around to get him.)
Katie: Oh uh I actually came here to ask you out.
Paul: Wait! Wait! Listen! Listen to this! (Flips a couple pages and points to something.) Yknow what I wanted to be when I was that age?