words in movies
Chandler: Our eyes are closed and were about to cross the street. Very good.
Ross: What did you want to show us? Because all I can see is this bitchin' van!
Phoebe: And also, we dont know what to do with this. (She turns on a switch and the girls nipples light up.)
Monica: (to Phoebe) Remember that guy from cooking school I told you about that put cilantro with everything?
Monica: Wow, Monica! What an amazing opportunity to influence dozens of people.
Monica: Oh no-no-no, its only one night a week, and plus I get to take all of you out for a lot of free dinners.
Chandler: (entering) Hey, you guys! Hey, Ross, quick question for ya. Are you ready to party?
Ross: I dont know, I could maybe go out for a couple of beers, but theres this thing about bumblebees on The Discovery Channel that I was planning to watch.
Chandler: No-no, I dont think you heard me. Are you ready to party?!
Ross: Nooo!! Gandolf?! Gandolf is coming to town?
Chandler: Kathys with her parents, I have nothing to do, so tomorrow we are partying with Gandolf dude!
Joey: Really. And what do you mean you never have fun anymore? You have fun with me, remember that time we saw those strippers and you paid me 50 bucks to eat that book?
Joanna: You know, Junior Miss is where I started. Oh, I had to sleep with the ugliest guy to get that job.
Joanna: No-ho-ho! (pause) Yeah. (pause) I mean, no-no-no-no-no, dont you worry, Im sure with your qualifications you wont need to sleep with some guy to get that job. Although, I might need some convincing.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is getting ready to party.]
Chandler: Look you dont understand, Gandolf is amazing. Yknow youre never know whats gonna end up happening, you go out for a couple of beers and end up on a fishing boat to Nova Scotia!
Chandler: (answering it) Hello. (listens) (to Ross) Its Gandolf!!! (on phone) So, are you in town? (listens) (disappointed) Oh, well, well maybe next time then. (Hangs up)
Joanna: Filing system? Oh-oh! You mean those-those little colored labels you put on all the folders? (to the committee) It certainly did brighten up the inside of the filing cabinets.
Rachel: Yes, Joanna really has been an incredible mentor to me.
Joanna: Oh yes, well theres the coffee too. (to the committee) Rachel can carry two things at once!
Phoebe: Ohh! Oh, the Chelsea Reporter, ohh, this used to keep me so warm.
Phoebe: Oh, okay! (reading) "Would I go back to Allesandros? Sure, but Id have to order two meals, one for me and one for the guy pointing the gun to my head." (to Monica) Wow! You really laid into this place.
Monica: Hey, they dont pay me a penny a word to make friends.
Monica: Oh! Do you need me to go with you?
Phoebe: Yeah, all right. (starts to leave)
Allesandro: I want to talk to you about your review.
Phoebe: (on intercom) Hey, do you need to get in? Here you go.
Allesandro: How long is this gonna take? Cause I got another critic to go yell at.
Rachel: No! It didnt! Thats what I want to talk to you about. (starts to break up) Now, just to brief you (starts to cry) I may cry, but they are not tears of sadness or of anger, but just of me having this discussion with you.
Joanna: Congratulations! You now just crossed the line into completely useless. Get out. (Sophie starts to cry and leaves)
Rachel: Do you want me to quit?
Rachel: Well of those things that you said in the interview, I mean if you believe any of them, I must not be a very good assistant. Yknow what? I am just gonna pack up my desk, (She goes over to get all of her belongings from the desk, which amount to a muffin and a pen) and I will be gone by the end of the day! (Realizes she has nothing.) Well, I guess theres no use to me sticking around til the end of the day! (Starts to leave.)
Joanna: Wait-wait-wait-wait! You can put your sad little muffin back in its drawer. If you must know the truth, I didnt want to lose a perfectly good assistant.
Joanna: Wait-wait-wait-wait-wait-wait-wait-wait!! If youre gonna get all sensitive about it! I dont want to lose you. What if I, create a position for you? Ill make you an assistant buyer in this department.
Chandler: Yeah, and I-I gave first names to all of the foosball players.
Joey: Well do it all, and better! Look, after tonight, Gandolf will want to party with us, dude! Come on!
Ross: Its not like we dont know how to party!!
Ross: (to Chandler) Hey-hey-hey, when uh, when were we on a boat?
Monica: Okay, the owner of Allesandros came over to yell at me, but instead I made him some sauce, and he offered me the job as head chef!!
Monica: Can you believe it? I finally get to run my own kitchen!
Rachel: Ohh, its gonna be so great! Im gonna get to help decide what we sell, Im gonna have an office with walls and everything. (turns to Monica) Im gonna have walls!
Monica: Ohh! Umm, Phoebe, I kinda need to talk to you about that. (Rachel excuses herself) Umm, well I-I-I think it might be time for me to take a step back from catering.
Phoebe: Youre the cook! With out you its just me driving up to peoples houses with empty trays and asking for money!
Joey: We dont need that wizard guy. We hit a couple of clubs, talked to some strangers, and uh, after this, well head down to the docks and see about that boat thing.
Joey: Yeah, but uh, I dont want to be up too late, so uh, Ill have a decaf.
Chandler: Actually, can I get some hot water with a little lemon? I think I strained my voice screaming in there. Does it have to be so loud?
Ross: Im just glad I brought that extra pair of socks, yknow? I used them as mittens, I didnt want to touch a thing in that last place.
Chandler: Yknow what? Were not sad, were not sad, were just not 21 anymore. Yknow? Im 29 years old, damnit! And I want to sit in a comfortable chair, and watch television and go to bed at a reasonable hour!
Joey: Yeah! And I like to hang out in a quiet place where I can talk to my friends.
Ross: And so what if I like to go home, throw on some Kenny G, and take a bath!
Monica: (entering) Ohh, here you are. Yknow, Im-Im glad you decided to hear me out.
Monica: All right, Ive got a whole bunch of uh-uh, stuff in this area, but umm, Im getting the feeling that you dont want to deliver.
Monica: Okay. Im guessing that if you dont want to deliver, you probably dont want to pick stuff up either.
Monica: Yeah, y'know I-I made a commitment to you. Yknow what, itd be, itd be fun.
Phoebe: Oh! It will be fun! Ohh! Yay! Oh! Okay, ooh, lets plan the wedding reception. (She grabs the notebook which Monica used for her ideas and starts flipping page after page after page after page after page to find a blank one.) Wow! You really wanted me to do something with this van. (pause) Yknow what, I want you to take the chef job.
Phoebe: Yeah. Thats what you really want. Yeah, I dont want to be the reason youre unhappy, that would just make me unhappy, and I really dont want to be the reason Im unhappy.
Phoebe: Besides, it might be kinda fun to form the new A-Team.
Mrs. Lynch: (starting to cry) No, Im sorry. I have to go. (She leaves as Sophie arrives.)
[Scene: Monicas new kitchen, Allesandro is introducing her to her new employees.]
Allesandro: Im so excited about having Monica come on board with us. Although I do feel bad about having fired chef Emillio, its like losing a member of the family. Of course, that literally is the case for several of you. Tony, Carlos, Marie, please, tell your father how much were gonna miss him. Now, I know that Monica has a lot of great ideas for this place, well, you all read the review. So without much further ado, I present to you our new head chef.
Phoebe: Oh! Okay! Yeah, thats okay. (To Patrick) Have a seat. (Sits Patrick down next to Rachel.)
PHOEBE: OK. I just met this producer of this like, teeny record company, who said that I have a very fresh, offbeat sound and she wants to do a demo of Smelly Cat.
[They stop briefly to look at Chandler, but then start fighting again.]
Joey: Well, right after I did that sex study down at NYU. (to Chandler) Hey, Remember that sweater I gave you for your birthday?
Ross: I've got to say you guys, that's an incredible gesture!
Missy: I'd love to!
Ross: C'mon you guys, this is really important to us.
Ross: Seriously you guys, I can't believe you're going to spend 250 dollars on the lottery, I mean that's such a bunch of boohaki.
[Cut to inside Monica and Chandlers, Monica, Chandler and Joey are eating breakfast.]
RACHEL: Well, we're not here to meet guys.� You have a boyfriend, I have a b. . . baby and a Ross.
Chandler: Okay, okay. You have to help us decide whose joke this is.
Monica: No, you dont want this. I want to have your grandmothers cookie recipe.
Ross: Well, you may wanna steer clear of the word 'dumped'. Chances are he's gonna be this, this broken shell of a man, y'know, so you should try not to look too terrific, I know it'll be hard. Or, y'know, uh, hey!, I'll go down there, and I'll give Barry back his ring, and you can go with Carol and Susan to the OB/GYN...
Monica: (running from the bathroom to her room, wearing only a towel) Not yet! Not yet! Not yet! Not yet! Not yet! Not yet! Not yet! Not yet! (gets to her room and closes the door, as Rachel gets up to answer the door.)
Monica: (laughs) You are so cute! No. No, it was a fight. You deal with it and move on! It's nothing to freak out about.
Joey: What are they doing out here? The coasts all the way over there. (Points to the coast.)
Russell: Yes, this Russell, Rosss divorce lawyer, just tell him that since I havent heard from him, I assume hes decided to give the marriage a try.
Ross: (pulls his hand away) Okay! Okay. (To his parents) Look, I, uh- I realise you guys have been wondering what exactly happened between Carol and me, and, so, well, here's the deal. Carol's a lesbian. She's living with a woman named Susan. She's pregnant with my child, and she and Susan are going to raise the baby.
Chandler: Oh, I had an appointment to get my haircut
Ross: Rach, I-I cant tell you how-how much that means to me! Ohh Wait a minute. Wait a minute. You-you hated the name Ruth! Why-why would you change your mind? Unless, you know were never going to have to use it. You did see the folder. You know its a boy!
Rachel: (on the phone) Monica, Im quitting! I just helped an 81 year old woman put on a thong and she didnt even buy it! (Pause) Im telling you Im quitting! Thats it! Im talking to my boss right now! (Pause) Yes I am! (Pause) Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Okay bye, call me when you get this message. (Hangs up.)
Rachel: No, I also had to go to a couple houses with him as his girlfriend. Oh, I am just awful with children!
David: Alright, but after this I want to see you outside. If the rain stops.
Ross: You know? Come to think of it, it does feel Rubella-like! (Walks back into his room.)
Phoebe: Because the more I drink, the less there is for the kids to drink.
Rachel: (to Phoebe) Really?
Monica: Hey! I sold that to Joey.
Ross: Mine stole my newspaper! Its like a crime wave!! (Monica runs to make more candy.) Pheebs, you uh, you got a second.
Roy: (out of breath) Have to...
Phoebe: And to knowing that your career doesn't mean everything. (Rachel mouths "aah")
(She goes back and forth, not sure what to do first, put the bagel down or grab the key. She finally puts the bagel down and grabs the key and goes over to unlock Joanna.)
Joey: (smiling from ear to ear) Ah-haah! I win!!
Phoebe: Ok, ok, you start preparing the formula and I start changing the box and then we gotta put them straight to bed.
Rachel: (Resenting the truth) I am not a baby! You know what? I swear to god, just because you get so uptight every time we...
Ross: Well, it matters to me.
Mike (to the charity guy): Oh my God, I love your shirt!
Rachel: No-no! Dont dance for me! Please? Dont! (She gets up to yell at her friends.) What is the matter with you guys?
Monica: Phoebe, that's how it starts. I don't need to eat the cake, I'll just smell the icing... why don't I just eat a little sliver, or, okay, just a slice or two. And next thing you know, you're 210 pounds and you get wedged in going down the tunnel slide. Phoebe, honey, I know this is hard. Look, if you talk to him, you're going to wanna see him. And if you see him, you're going to want to get back together with him. I know that's not what you want. (pause) Give me your phone.
Ross: (sarcastic) That would be a good way to get rid of all the PCP we have lying around.
Monica: What? Wait! Why? (He turns and heads for the door and she chases after him.) Chandler! Chandler! Wait! Im sorry, I was just playing for one second! I was trying to find you to tell you that, look if you don't want me to see Richard again, I won't! He means nothing to me!
Chandler: Yes, on a scale from 1 to 10, 10 being the dumbest a person can look, you are definitely 19.
(Cut to Chandler. He's walking around looking for Ross. He sees him kissing a girl next to a vending machine)
[Scene: ATM vestibule, Chandler and Jill are sitting below the counter with two pens dangling from their chains in front of them. Jill is showing Chandler how to swing the pen around his head.]
Mr. Geller: Have a seat son. (You can see Mr. Geller sitting closer to the door as Chandler walks over and sits in his lap.) Hey!! (Chandler quickly jumps off and sits next to him with a shocked expression on his face.)
Mr. Kaplan: Well, dont think I havent noticed your potential. Well, Ive got a project for you thats a lot more related to fashion. How does that sound?
Phoebe: Okay, what did we say was your one gift to us?
Carol: Is it a good sign that they asked us to hang around after the audition?
ROSS: Well we just wanted to stop by and uh, say goodnight.
Joey: Look, does someone mind switching to sit with Charlie?
(cut to Ross, Chandler and Rachel)
Ross: Yes, I do have a laundry room in my building, um, but there's a.... rat problem. Apparently they're attracted to the dryer sheets, and they're goin' in fine, but they're comin' out all.... fluffy. Anyway, say, sevenish?
Rachel: And uh, yeah, I didnt really, I didnt want to say anything, but it kinda it just, it kinda kept coming back to me, and umm, remember we were in the casino and for some reason thought it would be funny to eat a lot of grapes. And uh, and I thought it would be funnier if we got married. So as a, as a compromise we decided first to get married, and then (Ross joins in) to eat a lot of grapes. So umm, sorry I got us into this mess.
Emily: Ross umm, theres something that Ive got to tell you, theres-theres someone else.
Monica: (going through her pockets) No... (to Chandler and Phoebe) Either of you girls got a quarter?
Joshua: No, no, no, shes nice but, yknow, it just it made me realize that Im just not, Im just not ready to be dating, yknow?
(Cut to Chandler and Ross. Phoebe comes out of the ladies room and they run toward her.)
Phoebe: I decided to pee.
The Librarian: Well, yes! Just give me five minutes, I just have to find someone to cover my shift.
Mike: Do I have a minute to go to the bathroom?
Chandler: Im just trying to find the right moment, you know?
Mike: Is that what you say to Chandler?
Monica: (entering, happily) All right everybody! Everybody guess what? I just convinced Paul to give us a test next week!
(the screen says "6 to win" and "types of trees")
Phoebe: Why, do I have a feeling thats not as happy as it sounds? (Joey points out one going into the chipper to her, as this haunty, demonic music starts to play in the background) No! Nooooo!!! (she winces in horror and hides her face against Joeys shoulder, as she sees the tree spit out from the chipper.)
Jason: (to Phoebe) I-I cant believe this! You-youve slept with him?!
Chandler: (angrily) Well next time ask! Or at least wait for me to ask! (He storms out.)
Molly: Nice to meet you guys (to Chandler and Joey).
Chandler: All right, we havent had sex yet. Okay, whats the big deal? Yknow? This is special, and I want our love to grow until we move on to the next level.
Phoebe: Oh, happy my wedding day to you!
Phoebe: Listen to this! My reading was wrong, Im not going die!
Ross: Yeah, uh... and then I figured after you win, we could all go out to the balcony and see a night rainbow with gremlins dancing on top of it!
Joey: Dont worry man, I get to bring a guest. Well show him.
Monica: Oh. So nice of her to pull my hair, 'till I dropped the key!
[Scene: Outside Central Perk, Chandler and Monica are waiting for Phoebe to arrive with the cab.]
Joey: (to Mike) Hello Michael.
[Scene: Central Perk, the gangs putting their coats on to leave.]
(Phoebe grabs Gunther and kisses him. He then falls to the couch in shock.)
Joey: Oh, hey, you guys are finally gonna get to meet Kate!
[Cut to Ross at the kiddie table. He reaches for something and a fart noise emanates which causes the kids to laugh.]
Chandler: (to Tag) Okay, you are new!
(She leaves. Chandler presses his face to the glass door after her, stroking the window lovingly. He then turns to the security camera and starts talking to it.)
Monica: (to Danny) We'll be right there! (To Rachel) Can't you just say it starts later?
Chandler: I'm not supposed to tell you.
Chandler: (smiling to himself too) That's what I was doing too.
Ross: I'm not supposed to tell you!
Ross: Dude. You're married to my sister.
Joanna: Would you? Or, is it just to sad and desperate, and y'know something that Sophie would do?
(all eyes turn to Rachel)
Chandler: Unless Snoopy says it to Charlie Brown, I think we're okay.
Rachel: Right! But, none of that compared to how kind and-and how gentle and thoughtful he is. (Rubbing his shoulder.)
Joey: (to the waiter) What are you still doin here?! I told you, lobster ravioli!
Phoebe: (to Monica) Help me.
Monica: You really want me to come back?
Phoebe: I want you to be Crazy Bitch again.
Monica: Oh man! If I had known I was coming to this party I never would have gotten married!
(Chandler makes a 'Cross my heart' sign. It starts to rain and he taps on the window.)
Phoebe: (Turning to Mike) What do you think?
Joey: Yknow what? I think thats enough for now. Yeah. I dont want to be over rehearsed.
Mike: I think I wanna get married to you today.
Ross: Yeah, and to save you from any embarrassment umm, I think maybe I should talk first.