words in movies
Rachel: Woow!I haven't seen you this worked up since you did that dog food commercial and you thought you were gonna be with a real talking dog!
Chandler: (on the phone) "Look, this is ridiculous! I'm not paying for that room! Ok?" (pause) "Oh, thank you very much!" (hangs up) Yeah, I'm going to Vermont...
Phoebe: Well, you said that you had customers lined up in the street, so I am here to entertain!
Phoebe: Yeah! It really has been great too, you know, some of this people must have seen me play before because they were requesting a bunch of my songs! Yeah, "You suck" and "shut up and go home".
Chandler: I'm sorry, he's a little bit wound up, we had to stop at every maple candy stand on the way here.
Chandler: Let me get this straight. I called yesterday trying to cancel my reservation and I was told it was not refundable, then we drove six hours all the way up here and now you tell me that we don't have a reservation?
Ross: Dude, don't worry 'bout it! I know how we can make your money back! This is a nice hotel, you know, plenty of amenities, we just load up on those! Like those apples. Instead of taking one, I'm... I take six!
Rachel: (waking up) Ehhh, aw! (pause). Well, that's new!
Ross: (on the phone) Hi, this is Ross Geller in suite 206. It seems you forgot a couple of things. Could you have some complimentary toiletries sent up to my room? (pause) Thank you! Ok. Toothbrush, toothpaste, razor, mouthwash, deodorant, dental floss, band aids, shaving cream, after shave... and I feel like I am forgetting something... Is there anything else you have that I haven't asked for already? (pause) Yeah, go ahead, send up some tampons.
Chandler: Ok, how about this (picks up the remote control)?
Phoebe: Here, Monica, look what I got to wear when I play at the restaurant (she dons a top hat) uh, huh wait! (she raises a pair of spectacles to her eyes) Right? I mean, this might even class up the ballad of the uncircumcised man.
Monica: You know what? I take back what I said before. You keep playing at the restaurant, because with your music driving people inside, my bar sales are going up like crazy.
(he picks up the suitcase, which falls open, revealing all the stuff they have taken from the hotel. The receptionist just looks at them.)
Monica: ooohh... hey! Wanna stick around and I'll whip you up some dinner?
Joey: And I couldn't find this little plastic thing (holds up plastic thing) that goes on top of the blender...and I thought...well... how important can that be, right...? Turns out very!
Joey: (approvingly) Oh! ok, yeah, I think I can do that. Yeah ok, there's this party scene coming up.. and Olivia and her husband are there and all Drake wants to do is grab her and kiss her, but he can't... And that makes me think about all those times when I wanted to grab you and kiss you, but you didn't know so I would just pretend everything was cool, but really, it was killing me.
Monica: (without looking up from what she's doing) Besides tampons and salt? (Then looks) Ooh! My God! Maple candy! That's so sweet of you. (Opens the box) That's weird...it's empty!
Monica: Chandler, this is crazy! What did you even say to him! "Come up, meet my wife! Give us your sperm"!
Ross: Great! Uh, let me take this up for you. (The box hes holding.)
[Scene: Joeys Premiere, the movie is ending and it takes the applause to wake up Chandler.]
Ross: (Giggling) Hmm-Hmm-Hmm. (Picking up a piece of bread and covering his mouth.) Me, neither. Ive had a really good time too, you know. (Putting the bread down.)
Joey: I know, yeah. I feel like we're all growing up. Person named Wiener, God that kills me. (Laughs)
Rachel: Oh! Right! Yeah! Hold on, I'll be just clean up in here a little bit! Hello Gavin
Monica: What are you being such a weenie for? So he has a Barbi, big deal. You used to dress up like a woman.
Ross: Yeah! I opened up to her about all the terrible stuff that's been happening to me. I mean I talked for hours. (Joey has lost interest and is watching the race again.) It is amazing to have someone give you such-such focused attention.
Chandler: All right! Ten buck! Fork it over! Cough it up! Pay the piper! Gimme it.
(Cue up the music as they move in and kiss. This time I think it's Perry Como, but I'm not sure. It's Everybody loves somebody, sometime! Everybody falls in love somehow! Something in your kiss, just told me, my sometime, is now!)
Phoebe: I did it! One mile on a hippity-hop! Thats it!! Thats everything I wanted to do before I was thirty. Oh, except I wanted to patch things up with my sister. But oh well. Yay!! (They all cheer again.) And-and girls this thing is a Godsend if you know what I mean. (Rachel and Monica look intrigued and as they all head into Central Perk, Rachel picks up the hippity-hop that Phoebe left behind.)
Rachel: (crying) No. I cant, youre a totally different person to me now. I used to think of you as somebody that would never, ever hurt me, ever. God, and now I just cant stop picturing with her, I cant, (Ross stands up and backs away) it doesnt matter what you say, or what you do, Ross. Its just changed, everything. Forever.
Emily: Oh, no-no-no, thats not rude! Its perfectly in keeping with a trip that Ive already been run down by one of your wiener carts, and been strip-searched at John F. Kennedy Airport, apparently to you people, I look like someone whos got a balloon full of cocaine stuffed up their bum.
Rachel: No! No, of course not. No. Thats why I brought it up. (Pause) They didnt have any sodas?
(Meanwhile, another waiter has come up to the first waiter.)
Ross: Oh, I uh, just came by to pick up my skull. Well, not mine, but...Susan: Come in.
(A man sits down next to Phoebe and lights up a cigarette.)
Rachel: This bench, its hollow! I cant believe I never knew that! (She pushes all the pillows off it and opens it up) Oh, the presents!!!
Chandler: Yes! Remember? Right before we cut the cake, I went up to you and I said
Doug: Well, maybe I'll bring it out and have Monica stick her finger in it. That oughta sweeten it up, huh? (Once again, with the laugh.)
Chandler: Daddy. All right look, heres the story. (Flashback to Chandler about to enter the steam room as he does the voice-over.) Well, we had just finished playing racquetball and we were gonna take a steam. I walk into the steam room and it was really steamy. (The flashback shows his glasses fog up and him trying to find his way around the steam filled room. He takes off his glasses.) So I take off my glasses and thats when in happened.
Will: So you knocked her up but youre not gonna marry her. Dude! (Wants another high-five and Ross ignores him.) Anybody?
Chandler: We cant do that thats insane. I mean A he could wake up and B yknow, lets go for it.
Rachel: Y'know honey, umm, as uh, as flattered as I am that uh, you saw me first, uhh, I just, I-I don't think we should be cranking anything up.
Phoebe: (sits up) Oh, ew!
[Scene: Mr. Treegers apartment, Joey is there to suck up.]
Ross: Well, but aren't you pissed at him?! I mean this guy abandoned you! I gotta tell you if this were me, this guy would be in some serious physical danger! (Getting worked up) I mean I-I-I'd walk in there and I'd be like, "Yo, dad! You and me outside right now!" (Calming down.) I kinda scared myself.
Anxious Wedding Guest: (rushing up) Thats my car!
Joey: Wow! (Tearing up) Well, uh Hey! Im really happy for you guys! Congratulations! (Kisses Monica on the cheek) See you later. (Starts for the door on the verge of tears as Monica stops him.)
Ross: All right everyone, lift! (They and try to lift the car, of course it doesnt raise up) And slide!! (Everyone leans over, but the car still does not move.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Phoebe are there, both ready to break up with their significant others.]
Joey: Yeah but we wont be able to like get up in the middle of the night and have those long talks about our feelings and the future.
[Behind them, Joey goes up to the bandleader and interrupts the song.]
Director: Oh no! You get up there and do that again exactly like that!
Monica: Okay, just stay there a couple more hours and if she doesnt show up by then, then just come on home.
Phoebe: Okay, whatever. Yknow what? I dont have time have time to convince you because hes only here for four hours, and Im gonna go see him! (Gets up and leaves.)
Rachel: If we broke up, and I lost you...
Ross: (To Joey) Sir Limps-A-Lot, I came up with that.
[Scene: Hallway outside Chandler and Joey's apartment. Eddie walks up.]
Rachel: (Disgustedly she goes and tries to pick up the couch. Much to her amazement, she is successful.) Oh. Oh! I can do it!
CHANDLER: Oh yeah, your uh, name came up in a uh, conversation that terrified me to my very soul.
Joey: Hey! Whats up?
MONICA: Well, I thought that I would cut up the tomatos.
Rachel: Well honey, then why don't you break up with one of them?
Joey: Sure I do. (holding up his own dessert) Coule?
Chandler: Well, y'know if Joey and I played with matches we could get you up to an even hundred.
Chandler: It was pretty simple actually, I came up with a couple of cost-cutting solutions, wrote out a list and Monica told me to go to hell.
[Rachel seems touched. She pauses for a moment, then picks up the phone and starts to dial. Cut to Ross at his apartment.]
RACHEL: Oh, what a load of crap. That is a dot. Your mother is up in heaven going, 'Where the hell is my lily, you wuss?' OK, Phoebe, that is not a tattoo, this is a tattoo. [she bends over and bears her tattoo right when Ross returns]
(Seeing Rachels apparently okay with this, the rest of the gang jumps up to congratulate Ross and Emily on their pending nuptials.)
Phoebe: Wow! See, and I didn't think you'd be able to come up with anything.
(She holds up a black t-shirt with "FBI - Female Body Inspector" on the front.)
Chandler: If you said, "Big lima bean, bubbling up." Would she understand the difference?
Phoebe: Hey, look who's up! How do you feel?
Rachel: Up!
Ross: Yes, yes I am, one of the many things Im feeling. Well.... (picks up her coat)
[Scene: Central Perk, Robert is picking up Phoebe for a date.]
(Joey picks up and turns on a hair dryer.)
[Rachel, seeing what he did for her, gets up, walks across the room, and kisses Ross]
Phoebe: Okay. (on phone) Hey, can you send somebody up and down 76 and check every rest stop, and, and also 93? (listens) Okay! (hangs up) Yeah, no they dont do that.
Ross: Oh great! (They get up to dance and Ross is interrupted by a little girl.)
Joey: We've been stood up. (sniffles) And we want our free crab cakes.
Joey: And-and you wont blame us for any damage? (Gives Phoebe a thumbs up.)
(Just as they are about to pull away, a big, fat, bald guy pulls up in the exact same car as Ross and stops next to him.)
PHOEBE: Hey Ryan, what's up?
Joey and Monica: (jumping up from behind the couch) Merry Christmas!!
Monica: You know, on the way over here, I saw this drunk guy throw up. And then a pigeon ate it!
(she knees him in the crotch. He jumps up a bit)
MONICA: Over here dad. [he pans over and we see a torso taking up the whole screen]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Joey enter having just woken up.]
Chandler: (standing up) Im up! Im up, Ive gotten up now! Anybody ah, want anything?
(Phoebe gets up, holds the picture of Ross up to her face.)
Chandler: You kidding? Youre the most beautiful woman in most rooms (She jumps up and kisses him.) (Breaking the kiss.) Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whats going on? You and I just made out! You and I are making out?
Monica: (holding up a glove) Oh, an old glove?
(The women all clap and start to leave as Ross comes up to the instructor. Apparently he was hiding in the back.)
Ross: You know, I think that�s a good idea�our babysitter just pounded in another Chardonnet. (both get up) Bye, y�guys.
(Monica looks at Rachel, who gives her the thumbs up.)
Phoebe: (walking up) Whats up? (Rachel hands her the note and she reads it.) Tell Monica Im sorry. (Pause) Tell her yourself!
Rachel: Well, well I can up with it!
MR. GELLER: [going downstairs] Rachel, ready or not, here comes your knight in shining. . . oh no. [Chip has shown up and the four are leaving]
Rachel: Good. Although yknow, he-hes a private guy. Yknow, I wish I could get him to open up a little bit, share some feelings.
Joey: Oh-oh-oh-oh, how I do it is, I look a woman up and down and say, "Hey, how you doin?"
Joey: Someone you didnt make up!
Mrs. Bing: Oooh, c'mon, shut up, it's fun. Gimme a hug. (They both sit down) Well, I think we're ready for some tequila.
Monica: Only if I don't have to get up and sing.
Joey: Well. I guess you think youre pretty special huh? Sittin up here in your fancy small hall building. Makin stars jump through hoops for ya, huh? Well yknow what? (Throws the script away) This is one star whos hoop This is a star that the hoopthis hoopI was Dr. Drake Remoray!
Ross: Oh, wake up!
Chandler: They said it could be up to a year.
Joey: (getting up) Dude, I'm telling ya! I'm fine! (He tries to take a step and falls flat on his face.)
(This gorgeous woman in spandex walks up)
Ross: Well isnt there something you can do to earn a little extra money? I mean, cant-cant you pick up, I dont know, an extra shift here?
Monica: (on phone) Uh sorry, wrong number. (Hangs up)
Monica: Oh, and the people are so nice. There's this one guy, Geoffrey, he's the Maitre D., Chandler, you will love him. He is without a doubt, the funniest guy I have ever met. (Chandler, who was almost asleep again, sits up straight in bed in an instant and can't believe what he just heard.)
[Scene: Jasons apartment, Phoebe has gone to break up with Jason.]
[Scene: Joeys sisters house, theyre finishing up dinner.]
Rachel: Yeah, it was senior year in college. It was after the Sigma Chi luau and Melissa and I got very drunk! And we ended up kissing! For several minutes!
Rachel: Oh. Oh yeah, dont get to worked up over it. I mean it-it sounds like hes a doctor, but hes not.
Monica: No, you messed it up. Youre stupid.
Phoebe: Hey. I'm so excited; I just set up Rachel with the worst guy tonight.
Rachel: You need that, you need that too cause obviously, a thief could just tear this up. (Rips up the note.)