words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is there as Ross enters with his all his hair sticking straight up.]
Ross: Youre fast and irresponsible. That adds up to a bad driver.
Rachel: Well in High School, that added up to head cheerleader.
Phoebe: Okay, I think I need to do some shopping. (Gets up and leaves.)
{Transcribers Note: She puts the key into the ignition, which is on the left side of the steering wheel. Does anyone know why that is? Its a tradition left over from Porsches racing history. The worlds greatest endurance race is the 24 Hours of LeMans. Which is in France and runs for 24 hours straight from noon on Saturday through the dark of night and finishes at noon on Sunday. In the 60s LeMans had a unique start where the drivers would actually start the race outside of the car and across the track. At the start of the race, the drivers would run across the track, get in the car, buckle up, start the car, and drive off. Porsche wanted to reduce the amount of time that took. Since all cars to that point had the ignition switches on the right side of the steering wheel, that required the drivers to use their right hand to grab the seat-belts, put the car in gear and start it. The drivers left hand did nothing. Porsche in order to save a few seconds in a 24-hour race; moved the ignition switches to the left side of the steering wheel so that the driver could start the car with his left hand while grabbing the seat-belts with his right hand. Thats why every Porsche car built since then has the ignition on the left side of the steering wheel.}
Phoebe: Yeah! Sure! Ooh, I left my purse up at Monicas. Ill be right back. (She goes to get it.)
Chandler: No-no all kids are embarrassed by their parents, youd have to come up with a whole new word for what I went through. When I was in High School, he used to come to all of my swim meets dressed as a different Hollywood starlet. Yknow its hard enough to be fourteen. Youre skinny. Youre wearing speedoesThat your mom promised that you would grow into! And you look up into the stands and theres your dad cheering you on dressed as Carmen Miranda. We was wearing a headdress with real fruit that he will later hand out to your friends as a healthy snack!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey is walking from the bathroom to his bedroom and walks past a pile of Rachels laundry, which just happens to include a selection of panties. He stops, goes back to the basket, looks for Rachel, picks up a lavender thong, and heads for his bedroom. However, he decides he doesnt like his selection and goes back this time picking up a red low-cut silk brief and heads for his room, flexing along the way to prove his masculinity.]
(She sits back up as the policeman approaches. She undoes her top button.)
(He gets up to walk out, but Helena spots and stops him.)
Joey: Pantyhose! Yknow? They way they start at your toe and go all the way up to here (He mimed that and stops when he realized he went to far.) I should go take these off shouldnt I?
Chandler: (To Monica) When I was growing up I played the one on the far left.
(The policeman walks up.)
Joey: Yeah! Much! Listen uh, not that Im yknow insecure about my manhood or anything yknow, but I think I need to hook up with a woman like right now.
Monica: (comes up and starts looking through Rosss cookie supply) Ross, but me down for another box of the mint treasures, okay. Where, where are the mint treasures?
Monica: (to Joey) He is so cute. (to Angela and Bob) So, where did you guys grow up?
Phoebe: Yeah! Sure! Yep! (Gets up) Oh, y'know what? If I heard a shot right now, I'd throw my body on you.
Rachel: Well I assume the ah, happy couple isnt up yet. Did you guys hear them last night?
Rachel: (To the woman sitting in front of her) He-he said Rachel, right? Do you think I should go up there?
[Scene: Ross's room. Charlie is sitting on the bed, while Ross is walking up and down nervously]
Joey: Yeah. We figured when we couldnt find you, youd gone home to make up with Rachel. Which is probably what you shoulda done. Huh?
Rachel: Well, have you been involved with someone where you haven't broken up?
Chandler: Okay, I went over to Ross' apartment to bring back Clunkers. Yknow, for you, and (Clears his throat) I left the door open and she must have gotten out and I looked everywhere, all over the apartment, including the roof, which FYI Ross, one of your neighbors, growing weed. I couldn't find him, and I am so, so, so, sorry. But I do know where we could all go ease the pain. (Points up and then over to the street)
Joey: Kate Miller it is. (he picks up the Kate Miller badge and sticks it on Rachel's breast)
[Cut to Joey and Rachel's, Ross is living with Chandler and Joey. Joey and Ross have built a fort out of boxes, Chandler enters and they stand up slowly.]
Rachel: Alright. So whered you grow up?
Ursula: Hurry up I gotta pray!!
Ross: Hello. (He throws his jacket towards the coat rack and misses.) Im sorry Im a little late. Ah(Checks his watch)Whoa! A lot late. Let me start by uh, by introducing myself, I am Professor Geller. (The bell rings.) So to sum up, Im Professor Geller. Good job today.
Joey: (gets up) All right. Don't look at my list, Ross, 'cause there's a lot on there that you don't have.
Rachel: Yeah, I mean I was up sick all night.
Monica: Hey, I just whipped us up some Easy Bake treats, they should be ready in about three days.
Chandler: Oh my God, whats up?!
Rachel: No, I will. Im just not up for it tonight.
Rachel: Oh yeah! Ive come up with a bunch of ideas!
Ross: Right? And this! (He picks up a trophy) She-she couldve won this!
Rachel: (joining them) Well, I just checked our messages and Joshua didnt call. I mean youd think hed be worried about me not showing up at his club. Ugh, you know what makes it so much worse, Ross is all happy in Vermont!
<Chandler grabs Joey's left arm and pushes the sleeve up>
Joey: Hey. Well, whats up?
Joey: I guess I'm going to have to come up with a really good reason why I wasn't there. The producers are going to be so mad at me. They sat us all down yesterday and said "Everyone has to be there at 6:00 AM sharp, that means you Tribbiani." Like.. like I was some kind of idiot.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is walking into the living room having just gotten up in the middle of the night.]
Phoebe: Okay, (starts to pack up her stuff) fine. Come dinosaur, were not welcome in the house of no imagination.
Phoebe: Whoa-whoa-whoa! No drinks near the bucket! Set it down over there and then you can make a contribution! (The guy starts to walk away with a hurt look on his face.) And you can leave the hurt bunny look over there too! (Her boss and a co-worker walk up.) Hi Bob! (The same old lady from before walks bye.) (To the old lady.) I thought I told you to get outta here!
(Rachel picks up the next gift.)
Chandler: Hey Pheebs, whats up?
Monica: (laughs) No. (Closes the door as Chandler walks up.)
Rachel: Yknow, bonus night. Yknow, when two people break up but they get back together for just one night.
Richard: Oh, thank you. Youre welcome. (He stands up, staggers to the couch, and starts to lie down.)
Rachel: He was a hamster! I am not going to vacuum up my baby!
Rachel: (on the phone) Monica, Im quitting! I just helped an 81 year old woman put on a thong and she didnt even buy it! (Pause) Im telling you Im quitting! Thats it! Im talking to my boss right now! (Pause) Yes I am! (Pause) Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Okay bye, call me when you get this message. (Hangs up as her boss, Mr. Waltham, walks in.) Oh! Mr. Waltham, I ah really need to talk to you.
(They both sit down on the chairs and put up the foot rest.)
MNCA: Sure, what? Ok, ok. [hangs up the phone] [to Rachel] Music?
Ross: No really, you tell me whats up.
Rachel: Whats up?
Rachel: (Gasps) Are you breaking up with us?
Phoebe: Something just brushed up against my right leg!
Phoebe: Oh, Monica, grow up!
Joey: (walks to catch up to him) Alright, look, I'll start, OK?
(Microwave timer goes off. Monica gets up.)
Doug: Well, say no more. Y'know it takes guts to bring this up. Bing! Youre okay.
PHOEBE: Um, is, is there any chance that you're rounding up? You know, like from, like 20?
Ross: Well, Im, uh, going to pick up Mona. What have you got going tonight?
[Scene: Silvercup Studios, Dina is at the craft services table getting some food as Joey walks up.]
MRS. WINEBURG: Well it's wonderful to have you up and about, again, dear.
Joey: Hey, whats up?
CHANDLER: Hey I didn't kill your fish. Look Eddie...[puts his hand on Eddie's shoulder] Would you look at what I'm doin' here. That can't be smart. So we're just gonna take this guy right off ya and put him here in Mr. Pocket. Tangellon? [picks up the fruit an tosses it to Eddie, it hits Eddie in the chest and falls]
Monica: (on the answering machine) Rach! It's me! Pick up!
PHOEBE: OK. [singing] Smelly cat, smell-ly cat, what are they feeding you? Smelly cat [back up singers - smelly, smelly, smelly, really bad smelly cat, it's not your fault] OK, sorry. I'm just, I'm just not getting that everyone um, gets how smelly this cat acually is. I just think that maybe if we could talk about this, 'cause I need to feel that you really care about the cat.
Monica: (Looking nauseous from her parents kissing.) And Im going to go get drunk. (Gets up to get a drink.)
Monica: Because your all gonna make up fake specials and make me cook them like you did the other night?
Rachel: Joey? Whats up?
Rachel: Okay whats up?
(They go inside and Ross closes the door. When he turns around Elizabeth walks up to him, pushes him back against the door, and starts kissing him.)
Rachel: Oh wow! What now Ross youre not gonna talk? How on earth will you ever annoy me? Oh wait a minute, I know. (Mimics his breathing.) I mean youd think the damn jalepeno wouldve cleared up your sinuses, but no!! Thats not enough (Ross jumps over and kisses her.) What are you doing?!
Monica: Just go up to her and ask her out. (Chandler laughs) Oh, what's the worst thing that could happen?
Monica: Whats up?
Joey: I wish. No. After dinner, me, her, and Pepper all fell asleep in front of the fire. Well I woke up in the middle of the night and I saw that the fire was dying out. So, I picked up a log and threw it on. Or, at least what I thought was a log.
Joey: I know. It was so cool when I was up there before. Me and Jim Belushi would just be crackin up about something Then I get fired off of Days Of Our Lives and he takes me down. Now hes just laughing at me. Look at him, that smug Belushi bastard, Ill
Joey: I can't. It's like this chemical thing, you know. Every time she starts laughing, I just wanna (grimaces and tenses up) pull my arm off just so that I can have something to throw at her.
Chandler: I think its great that you work here. Youre going to make a lot of money, and heres your first tip: Dont eat yellow snow. (He laughs, then picks up a pen, glares at Ross, and writes in his journal). Ah ha ha, 2:15, coffeehouse.
Monica: How many fingers am I holding up? (She's not holding any up.)
Roy: No, no, you're right. Who am I kidding? I should have hung up that breakaway jockstrap years ago. What am I gonna do? I mean, this has been my life for thirty two years. Taking my clothes off in front of people is all I know.
Richard: (standing up quickly) Drink?
Ross: (walking up with this huge tub-o-popcorn and drink) Hey!
Chandler: I'm telling you, she gives the worst massages ever!! Okay, it was like she was torturing me for information. And I wanted to give it up I justI didn't know what it was!
(A wave crashes on the beach and partially fills up his hole.)
Ross: Yeah, I know, so what? I mean, whos-whos to say? Does that me we-we cant do it? Look, huh, I was with Carol for four years before we got married and I wound up divorced from a pregnant lesbian. I mean, this, this makes sense for us. Come on! I mean, on our first date we ended up spending the whole weekend in Vermont! I mean, last night I got my ear pierced! Me! This feels right. Doesnt it?
Phoebe: Sure, yeah, no I can do that, yeah, because umm, y'know, the muscles in the siadic area can get yknow, real (lifts up the towel) nice and tight. So umm, tell me Rick, how umm, how did you injure the area.
Joey: Uh.. <forgetting what the work thing was, rolls up his sleeve on his right arm and shows Phoebe, she looks>
Joey: Oh! (Pulls up his pants.) Sorry. Uh, Ive got those plans with Phoebe, why?
Phoebe: "Pick up grandma at the airport"?
Phoebe Sr: Take it easy--if you want, theres cookies on the counter, or, or--sangria! (jumps up) I can make sangria!
Phoebe: I cant believe that! Now the only thing left of my grandmothers legacy is this crumb. (She picks it up with her finger and holds it out to Monica.) I wish you a long and happy marriage.
Rachel: Yeah! Okay, two larges coming right up!
Director: (on phone)...Dammit, hire the girl! (He hangs up the phone.) Okay, everybody ready?
(Suddenly Ross jumps up from behind the counter armed with a plastic gun. By the way, hes overacting too.)
CHANDLER: Yeah.� I feel so bad.� Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?
Mona: Joey cracks me up! Its like, Yeah, why dont you have your ex-wife move in with you? That wouldnt be awkward at all! (she laughs again)
Joey: No, Yeeees. God, how do I say this. (walks into the kitchen, Chandler follows closely, he turns around and gets startled). Oh, hi, you know that girl from the Greek restaurant with the hair (holds his hands up to signify she has big hair)?
Ross: Yeah! Oh yeah, youll be fine! It-itll be uh, just like bungy jumping. Yknow? But instead of bouncing back up you-you wont.
Ross: Anyway, I figured after work I'd go pick up a bottle of wine, go over there and, uh, try to woo her.
Rachel: I feel like were the only two people in the world. (She sets down her wine class, picks up a walnut, and knocks another one on the floor.) Oops. Sorry. (She reaches down to pick it up and Ross hands it to her. Ross is hiding under the couch and causes Rachel to scream.)
Joey: This is embarrassing. (Looks it up.)
(Joey steps in a picks up the paper, the gang all look at him.)
Joey: Terrible! I messed up every line! I shouldnt even be an actor!
CHANDLER: Well, I think you should seriously consider the marriage thing, give Rachel another chance to dress up like Princess Bubble Yum.
Ross: Oh well, I guess Ill catch up with her later.
FBOB: OK, now before I go, does anybody else need to be picked up? [everyone raises their hands] I'm still gonna go.
Rachel: (laughs) Okay. All right, stand up. (They do so.) Well, when were at the door, I lightly press my lips against his, and then move into his body just for a second, and then I make this sound, "Hmmm." Okay, I know it doesnt sound like anything, but I swear it works.
Phoebe: (To Monica) Wrap it up, wrap it up, wrap it up
Aurora: (getting up and dressing) I'm sorry. He'll be waiting for me.
Phoebe: I know! I know, I opened it up and there it was, just floating in there, like this tiny little hitch-hiker!
Ross: What are you doing up?
Ross: (entering) Hey! I just heard. What's up?
Chandler: Ill make something up! Im good at lying, I actually did borrow your Walkman!