words in movies
Phoebe: Why? Just 'cause you're too lazy to get up off your touchie?
Joey: Uh, Entertainment Tonight. [Cut to Chandler] Yeah, okay so, good talking to ya and don't come out here. All right. (Hangs up the phone and poses for that picture.)
Monica: It was, it was really nice. We started talking and I-I ended up having lunch with him.
Ross: Yeah? All right I'll call the airlines. (Picks up the phone and does so)
Phoebe: Ah-ha! Okay, (takes out a notepad) Las Vegas 1, London 0! I'll be right back. (Gets up and heads aft.)
Rachel: (takes off her robe) Oh! Look what happened! {Don't get your hopes up guys, we only get to see her from the back or from the neck up. Its times like these I wish that the networks would broadcast some nudity other than Denis Franz's butt.} (In her head.) Huh, check me out! I'm in my kitchen naked! I'm picking up an orange. (Does so) I'm naked! (Goes into the living room) Lighting the candles, naked, and carefully. (She backs anything that might have a point like a candle on her body away.)
[Cut to Ross's apartment, he's sitting by his window looking at an art book. As he's turning the page, he glances up and notices something.]
Phoebe: Hey you guys wait! Guys! (Catches up to them.) This place is so much better than London! Okay? This lady dressed like Cleopatra gave me a coupon, 99 cent steak and lobster dinner. Huh!
Joey: Well, the movie got shutdown because they ran out of money, so I'm working here 'til it starts up again, if it ever does.
Chandler: Y'know, if I won $5,000 I'd join a gym, y'know build up my upper body and hit Richard from behind with a stick! (Mimics it.)
Phoebe: So go fix it! Go find Chandler! He's probably up in your room! Tell him that you're sorry and that you love him.
Monica: Y'know what? You're right Phoebe. You're right. Thank you! (Gets up to find Chandler.)
[Cut to the casino, Monica is walking through it past the craps table when she notices a chip on the floor. She picks it up and heads to the table.]
Monica: Anybody lose this? (Holds up the chip and the woman next to her shakes her head no.)
(Ross keeps giggling and Rachel decides upon revenge. She gets up and kisses the rather large man in the seat in front of Ross on the back of his head. The guy turns around angrily.)
Joey: This is Vegas man! People will pay to see freaky stuff! Okay, how much would you pay to see this hand (Holds up his left hand) twice? Huh?
Chandler: No! No! I support you 100%! I just didn't, I didn't get it right away. Y'know now I'm caught up! Identical hand twins! It's a million-dollar idea!
Phoebe: Ohh, you are so lucky! (To Chandler) Hey! So, where's Monica? Did you guys make up?
Phoebe: But she just came up here!
Phoebe: Yes! Now, she feels terrible! She really wants to make up! You gotta find her.
Chandler: Okay. (He gets up and goes to find her.)
[Scene: Caesar's Palace Casino, Chandler is looking for Monica while Tom Jones's signature song is playing in the background (Getting the theme yet? Tom Jones, Wayne Newton, casinos They're in Vegas people! Catch up!) It's Not Unusual, y'know, "It's not unusual to be loved by anyone! It's not unusual to have fun with anyone! But when I see you hanging about with anyone, it's not unusual to see me cry! I wanna die." Well, while that's playing he spots Monica playing craps and in victory hug the guy next to her. Chandler turns and walks out.]
Ross: Okay when you're playing a machine and it hasn't paid out, a lurker waits for you to give up and then
Chandler: Come on! I was there! (He's propped up with his hand on a statute of a naked guy. He winces and pulls his hand away.) I know he's the love of your life.
Monica: Really! (They hug and kiss) All right? Let's forget about this going home stuff and celebrate our anniversary. (She picks up his suitcase.) Okay, this is empty.
Joey: He's kinda tall, dark hair, hand looks exactly like this. (Holds up his hand.) See?
Ross: (on the phone) Yes, hello. I have a question. Umm, I used your pen to draw on my friend's face. (Listens) A beard and a moustache. (Listens and laughs) Thank you. (Rachel turns around and glares at him.) No, she didn't think so. (Listens) I know it's like (turns and sees Rachel staring at him and quickly changes the subject) anyway, umm well make-up didn't cover it and we've tried everything to get it off and nothing's worked. What-what do we do? (Listens) Yeah. (Listens) Uh-huh. (Listens) Yeah. (Listens) Oh! Okay. (Listens) Okay, thank you! (Rachel gets excited at his tone.) (Hangs up the phone) Yeah, it's not coming off.
Phoebe: Ohh! You made up!
Joey: (holds up his hand) Joey!
Ross: (gets up) All right. Y'know what? We dont have to go downstairs! We can bring Vegas up to us! (He grabs a deck of cards and pulls up a chair.) All right, come on, come on, we'll play some blackjack. Here we go. (Deals the cards.) 13.
Monica: Shut up!! It just got interesting!
Chandler: Okay, so if an eight comes up, we take it as a sign and we do it! {Whoa! Where have I heard that before? Matthew Perry talking about signs in Las Vegas. I guess it must've been some movie I saw.} What do you say?
(He searches to his right; she searches to her left. They're both on their hands and knees when they spot the die. It's propped up against the table leg, and it's not lying flat. Both the four and the five are showing.)
(Cue up the music as they move in and kiss. This time I think it's Perry Como, but I'm not sure. It's Everybody loves somebody, sometime! Everybody falls in love somehow! Something in your kiss, just told me, my sometime, is now!)
Phoebe: Oh well, lost again. (She gets up and slowly moves away. The lurker scurries in and takes her spot, only this time Phoebe set a trap for her and catches her in the act.) That's it! You and me, outside!
Rachel: Yeah, and also we need more umm, drinks. Hold on a second. (Gets up but stumbles a little bit.) Whup, okay. (She makes it to the phone and picks it up, without dialing.) Hello! Vegas? Yeah, we would like some more alcohol, and y'know what else? We would like some more beers. Hello? Ohh, I forgot to dial!
Ross: That must be our alcohol and beers! (Gets up to answer it.)
Ross: I'll do it. Hey, whatever you need me to do, I'm your man. (He starts to sit down on the bed. There's one problem though, he's about two feet to the left of it. Needless to say, he misses and falls on his butt.) (Looking up at Joey.) Whoa-oh-whoa! Are you, are you okay?
[Scene: The slot machines, we see some guy not having any luck. Both Phoebe and the Lurker are lurking him and each stick their heads around the corner at different times This is all set to that Pink Panther song. Finally the guy gives up and walks past the lurker's position, thus giving her the advantage. She scurries in and quickly drops a coin in the slot before Phoebe gets there. Phoebe arrives slightly later and pulls the arm just after the lurker deposits the coin and wins.]
Chandler: Okay, all right, all right, all right! Okay! (Picks up a blue sweater.) Okay, here's something, here's something blue and new.
Chandler: Okay! (Stands up) This is it! (Claps his hands) We're gonna get married!
Joey: Wow! (Tearing up) Well, uh Hey! Im really happy for you guys! Congratulations! (Kisses Monica on the cheek) See you later. (Starts for the door on the verge of tears as Monica stops him.)
Ross: All right everyone, lift! (They and try to lift the car, of course it doesnt raise up) And slide!! (Everyone leans over, but the car still does not move.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Phoebe are there, both ready to break up with their significant others.]
Joey: Yeah but we wont be able to like get up in the middle of the night and have those long talks about our feelings and the future.
[Behind them, Joey goes up to the bandleader and interrupts the song.]
Director: Oh no! You get up there and do that again exactly like that!
Monica: Okay, just stay there a couple more hours and if she doesnt show up by then, then just come on home.
Phoebe: Okay, whatever. Yknow what? I dont have time have time to convince you because hes only here for four hours, and Im gonna go see him! (Gets up and leaves.)
Rachel: If we broke up, and I lost you...
Ross: (To Joey) Sir Limps-A-Lot, I came up with that.
[Scene: Hallway outside Chandler and Joey's apartment. Eddie walks up.]
Rachel: (Disgustedly she goes and tries to pick up the couch. Much to her amazement, she is successful.) Oh. Oh! I can do it!
CHANDLER: Oh yeah, your uh, name came up in a uh, conversation that terrified me to my very soul.
Joey: Hey! Whats up?
MONICA: Well, I thought that I would cut up the tomatos.
Rachel: Well honey, then why don't you break up with one of them?
Joey: Sure I do. (holding up his own dessert) Coule?
Chandler: Well, y'know if Joey and I played with matches we could get you up to an even hundred.
Chandler: It was pretty simple actually, I came up with a couple of cost-cutting solutions, wrote out a list and Monica told me to go to hell.
[Rachel seems touched. She pauses for a moment, then picks up the phone and starts to dial. Cut to Ross at his apartment.]
RACHEL: Oh, what a load of crap. That is a dot. Your mother is up in heaven going, 'Where the hell is my lily, you wuss?' OK, Phoebe, that is not a tattoo, this is a tattoo. [she bends over and bears her tattoo right when Ross returns]
(Seeing Rachels apparently okay with this, the rest of the gang jumps up to congratulate Ross and Emily on their pending nuptials.)
Phoebe: Wow! See, and I didn't think you'd be able to come up with anything.
(She holds up a black t-shirt with "FBI - Female Body Inspector" on the front.)
Chandler: If you said, "Big lima bean, bubbling up." Would she understand the difference?
Phoebe: Hey, look who's up! How do you feel?
Rachel: Up!
Ross: Yes, yes I am, one of the many things Im feeling. Well.... (picks up her coat)
[Scene: Central Perk, Robert is picking up Phoebe for a date.]
(Joey picks up and turns on a hair dryer.)
[Rachel, seeing what he did for her, gets up, walks across the room, and kisses Ross]
Phoebe: Okay. (on phone) Hey, can you send somebody up and down 76 and check every rest stop, and, and also 93? (listens) Okay! (hangs up) Yeah, no they dont do that.
Ross: Oh great! (They get up to dance and Ross is interrupted by a little girl.)
Joey: We've been stood up. (sniffles) And we want our free crab cakes.
Joey: And-and you wont blame us for any damage? (Gives Phoebe a thumbs up.)
(Just as they are about to pull away, a big, fat, bald guy pulls up in the exact same car as Ross and stops next to him.)
PHOEBE: Hey Ryan, what's up?
Joey and Monica: (jumping up from behind the couch) Merry Christmas!!
Monica: You know, on the way over here, I saw this drunk guy throw up. And then a pigeon ate it!
(she knees him in the crotch. He jumps up a bit)
MONICA: Over here dad. [he pans over and we see a torso taking up the whole screen]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Joey enter having just woken up.]
Chandler: (standing up) Im up! Im up, Ive gotten up now! Anybody ah, want anything?
(Phoebe gets up, holds the picture of Ross up to her face.)
Chandler: You kidding? Youre the most beautiful woman in most rooms (She jumps up and kisses him.) (Breaking the kiss.) Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whats going on? You and I just made out! You and I are making out?
Monica: (holding up a glove) Oh, an old glove?
(The women all clap and start to leave as Ross comes up to the instructor. Apparently he was hiding in the back.)
Ross: You know, I think that�s a good idea�our babysitter just pounded in another Chardonnet. (both get up) Bye, y�guys.
(Monica looks at Rachel, who gives her the thumbs up.)
Phoebe: (walking up) Whats up? (Rachel hands her the note and she reads it.) Tell Monica Im sorry. (Pause) Tell her yourself!
Rachel: Well, well I can up with it!
MR. GELLER: [going downstairs] Rachel, ready or not, here comes your knight in shining. . . oh no. [Chip has shown up and the four are leaving]
Rachel: Good. Although yknow, he-hes a private guy. Yknow, I wish I could get him to open up a little bit, share some feelings.
Joey: Oh-oh-oh-oh, how I do it is, I look a woman up and down and say, "Hey, how you doin?"
Joey: Someone you didnt make up!
Mrs. Bing: Oooh, c'mon, shut up, it's fun. Gimme a hug. (They both sit down) Well, I think we're ready for some tequila.
Monica: Only if I don't have to get up and sing.
Joey: Well. I guess you think youre pretty special huh? Sittin up here in your fancy small hall building. Makin stars jump through hoops for ya, huh? Well yknow what? (Throws the script away) This is one star whos hoop This is a star that the hoopthis hoopI was Dr. Drake Remoray!
Ross: Oh, wake up!
Chandler: They said it could be up to a year.
Joey: (getting up) Dude, I'm telling ya! I'm fine! (He tries to take a step and falls flat on his face.)
(This gorgeous woman in spandex walks up)
Ross: Well isnt there something you can do to earn a little extra money? I mean, cant-cant you pick up, I dont know, an extra shift here?
Monica: (on phone) Uh sorry, wrong number. (Hangs up)
Monica: Oh, and the people are so nice. There's this one guy, Geoffrey, he's the Maitre D., Chandler, you will love him. He is without a doubt, the funniest guy I have ever met. (Chandler, who was almost asleep again, sits up straight in bed in an instant and can't believe what he just heard.)
[Scene: Jasons apartment, Phoebe has gone to break up with Jason.]
[Scene: Joeys sisters house, theyre finishing up dinner.]
Rachel: Yeah, it was senior year in college. It was after the Sigma Chi luau and Melissa and I got very drunk! And we ended up kissing! For several minutes!
Rachel: Oh. Oh yeah, dont get to worked up over it. I mean it-it sounds like hes a doctor, but hes not.
Monica: No, you messed it up. Youre stupid.
Phoebe: Hey. I'm so excited; I just set up Rachel with the worst guy tonight.
Rachel: You need that, you need that too cause obviously, a thief could just tear this up. (Rips up the note.)
Ross: Yeah, no, youre right, I know, youre right, Im not, Im not gonna do it. All right, thanks guys. (Gets up to leave.)
Chandler: So, who's up for a big game of Kerplunk?
Rachel: Ohhh! That is soo sweet! (gets up to get herself a cup of coffee)
Phoebe: Or you could end up with everything.
Phoebe: It's amazing! You better hurry up and fill out an application or I'm gonna beat you to it.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's kitchen, Chandler has a jug of milk in his hands and decides to make some warm milk. He opens up the cabinet to get a pot and manages to knock several other pots onto the floor making a lot of noise.]
Ross: Oh, that's great, that is great! (Hugs and kisses Carol. Then picks up a picture frame)
Phoebe: (to Pete) Wow! Thats exciting, you went to Japan, made up a woman.
Chandler: Open up! Open up! Open up!
Phoebe: Umm, my friend, Bonnie. She just always thought Ross was really cute, and now that you two arent together, she asked if I could set it up, but if youre not cool with it...
Chandler: Yeah, I know, but all of those little annoying things she did before we fell in love? Like her voice, her laugh, her personalityWell, theyre all back! Yknow? And shes picked up like nine new ones!
Monica: They've only been going out for a few weeks and Phoebe is completely hung up on Mike! She'll say "No", David's heart will be broken, it will be too hard for them to recover from and then Phoebe will end up alone again.
Phoebe: I've always wanted to live with a guy. "Pick up your socks!" "Put down the toilet seat!" "No! We're not having sex anymore!" It's gonna be fun!
Ross: (on phone) No-no-no, thats great! Ill be there Monday. And thank you again! (Listens) Okay. (Hangs up) (To All) Umm, that was the head of the Paleontology department at N uh, Y, uh U!
Ross: A pigeon, a pigeon. (previously scared Rachel turns away) No, no wait, no-no, an eagle flew in. Landed on the stove and caught fire. The baby, seeing this, jumps across the apartment to the mighty bird�s aid. The eagle, however, misconstrues as an act of aggression and grabs the baby on its talon. Meanwhile the faucet fills the apartment with water. Baby and bird still up lays (?) are locked in a death grip, swirling around the whirl pool, that fills the apartment.
[Scene: Pier 59 Studios, Joey is walking up to C.H.E.E.S.E. and Wayne.]
The Cigarette Guy: Hi, Im Joshua, Im here to pick up Rachel.
Ross: Look sweetie, I could be the bigger man, I could be the biggest man, I could be a big, huge, giant man, and it still wouldnt make any difference, except that I could pick your Father up and say Like me! Like me tiny doctor!
Chandler: Id like to go up the ladder of chance to the golden mud hut please.
Joey: Yeah. Sure. (They both half stand up, Joey pulls the neck of his sweater out, and Rachel looks down it to see his T-shirt.)
Ross: Rach, I told you, you can't call him every time any little thing comes up.
Chandler: (looking up with her) Thats a plane!
Phoebe: What-whats up?
Phoebe: I know! (Phoebe picks up a little packet of sugar, shakes it, and then realises she can't open it with one hand, but doesn't want to let go of Mike's hand. She tries to tear open the packet with one hand.)
Joey: It's like if you woke up one day and found out your dad was leading this double life. He's like actually some spy, working for the C.I.A. (Considers) That'd be cool.... This blows!
Monica: Well, why dont we just bunny up.
Chandler: Look I never should have kissed your girlfriend, but Im (Joey hangs up the phone again.)
Monica: Ive been doing a lot of thinking. A lot! And umm, well, I came up with a whole bunch of businesses you can do with your van. Okay umm, you could be flower delivery person.