words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, the whole gang is there, Ross is telling a story about what happened at work and the rest of the gang are thinking to themselves, denoted by italics.]
Gunther: What does Rachel see in this guy? I love Rachel. I wish she was my wife.
Chandler: What a wank!
Joey: Guess what?
Ross: What?
Monica: Whats the part?
Joey: Oh, and guess what, I got an audition for All My Children.
Phoebe: Oh, hey, hey Nick the boxer lets see what you got. All right ya, put em up. Come on. (they start shadow boxing)
Dr. Green: This where they put it? What, there no table available in the kitchen! Hello, baby.
Dr. Green: What happened to the library?
Dr. Green: You know whats really good here, the lobster. What do you say shall I just order three.
Dr. Green: What kind of person is allergic to lobster? I guess the kind of person that works at a library.
Dr. Green: (interrupting him) I know!! Its a museum! What, youre the only one around here who can make a joke! At least mine was funny. Ah, waiter, we will have two lobsters and a menu. (nods at Ross, and mouths I dont know to the waiter.)
Dr. Green: They found rust. You know what rust does to a boat?
Dr. Green: (gets his receipt and notices the twenty) What is this? Who put a twenty down here? Huh?
Dr. Green: This is nice. I pay two hundred dollars for dinner, you put down twenty, and you come out looking like Mr. Big Shot. You really want to be Mr. Big Shot? Here, Ill tell you what, you pay the whole bill, Mr. Big Shot, all right. (rips up the bill, and throws it at Ross, then leaves)
Student: Guess what, I got an audition!
Joey: You bet! Whats the part?
Ross: Hey Pheebs, what are you doing?
Monica: (sees the bed) Whats this?
Phoebe: When I was you! Y'know what, its all Joeys fault, cause he left his nose open!
Phoebe: Its Monicas bed. What?
Phoebe: So. This has always been Monicas bed, what youre just noticing now, how self-involved are you?
Dr. Green: Nice hair. Whatd ya do? Swim here?
Rachel: What? What? Hes interested in you. He-he likes your hair, he just wants to know how you got here.
Rachel: What?!
Dr. Green: Ross? Whats with the neck?
Ross: Thank you! Thats what I keep saying.
Dr. Green: What do you need help for?
Rachel: What? Its true, my right leg is two inches shorter.
Ross: What can I do, she doesnt listen to me about renters insurance either.
Dr. Green: Well what if somebody steals something? How are you gonna run after him with one leg shorter than the other?!
Rachel: Fine. Fine, but Ill have you know that once I taught him that stuff he called me Fun Aunt Rachel. And I loved being Fun Aunt Rachel but Ill go back to being Boring and Uncomfortable Aunt Rachel if thats what you want!
Ross: What is that? (refering to the sandwich)
The Security Guard: What?!
Chandler: What a great apology! (To Monica) And you accept! Okay, bye-bye!
Rachel: Okay. Uhh, Ross, y'know what, there's something that I-that I have to talk to you about and everybody's saying that I shouldn't tell you, but I think they're wrong. I mean, and you know how people can be wrong.
Rachel (as Monica): You know what, it's feeling a lot better, thank you, um... Well, listen, why don't you two sit down and, and we'll get you some glasses... okay... (They don't know what to do with their coats and Monica points to the living room) STAT!
Joey: You know what? I think I'm gonna stay here and make sure he's okay.
Ross: Ohh, whats wrong?!
Rachel: Okay, yknow what?! I know-I know how to settle this! All right here, this is what were gonna do! Im gonna write Joey on one napkin (does so) and Im gonna right Ross on the other napkin (does so) and we are going to pick one! And that person is going to be our backup! Okay?
Phoebe: Uh-huh, what?
The Cooking Teacher: Thats very good, whats your name?
Rachel: Oh! Ow! (Joey motions, "You see what I mean?!")
Phoebe: What do you mean, comforted her?
Ross: Yeah, see.. you took mine. Chandler, what about you?
Joey: (on phone) Mom, so what did you think? (He walks away allowing the gang a chance to figure out what theyre gonna say.)
Rachel: What?!!
Joey: Hey, whats up?
Monica: No, they gave us glasses with lipstick on them! I mean, if they didn't change the glasses, who knows what else they didn't change. (He glares at her.) Come on sweetie, I just want this weekend to be perfect, I mean we can change rooms, can't we?
Chandler: (to Ross and Monica) What if Joey were president?
Joey: So uh, what are you guys doing?
RACHEL: You want me to just call him up and tell him that you're seeing him instead? That's what you want?
Chandler: What?!
Rachel: (shakes her head) I guess... Oh, I just had such an idea of what this day would be like, you know? Emma laughing and everybody gathered around her cake singing "Happy Birthday". Then we would all go into... HEY GET OUT OF THE ROAD YOU STUPID STUDENT DRIVER!!! (honks furiously, and Ross looks at her in disbelief and Rachel looks at him.) They have to learn!
Monica: Please! I made this game what it is.
Chandler: Yknow, I cant believe Kathy did this too me. I really, thought that she was the one. I tell you what, from now on Im never getting out of this chair, ever! Okay? From now on, this chair is the one! You wanna what else is the one? My sweat pants!
Joey: What?!
Chandler: Whats wrong with you?
Rachel: Well dontWhat happened to Jessicas body?!
Phoebe: Yknow what? Im not talking to you! You go back to sleep! (To the hitchhiker) And you, are you a rapist?!
Susan: Oh, no, nonononono, you see what he's doing? He knows no-one's gonna say all those names, so they'll wind up calling her Geller, then he gets his way!
Monica: You don't tell me what to do! I tell you what to do! Just call her. She's at the Paradise Hotel in Barbados. And while I've got you, you've got curly hair. What do you do in humidity? (Mike hangs up the phone) Damnit!
Joey: Uh no Rach, hes gone. But listen, he told us what happened and it does, it sounds like an honest mistake.
Chandler: What, Ethan? He got to spend the whole day with you!
Chandler: (aside, to Ross) What!? They are totally ripping us off!
Rachel: Yeah. What kind of discount do we get?
CHANDLER: Oh no no no no, no no no no no no, you see, what I had planned shouldn't take more that 2, 3 minutes tops.
Monica: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Yeah, hi! Mrs. Tribbiani? (Listens) Hi, this is Monica Geller. (Listens) Yeah Im just calling to say that Chandler and I uh, really hope you can make it to the wedding. Yeah, apparently a bunch of invitations that we sent werent delivered. Umm, I guess there was some screw up at the damn post office! (Joey nods his approval.) (Listens) T-Tell me about it! (Listens) Yeah, yeah, the US Post Office? No, more like US lost office! (Listens) What are they Irish?! (Joey gives her a thumbs up.)
Joey: (looks at her, shocked) What?!
Ross: (stopping quickly) Oh umm, theres also a book here by a woman named Wendy Bagina. (They both laugh, but stop when the hear moaning coming from the next aisle.) What is that?
Chandler: What?
Chandler: Whoa-whoa-whoa! What?
Pete: Nooo. Uh-huh, no way. What? No.
Rachel: Ross! Yknow what, I just gotwhy? Why did you do this?!
Monica: What the hell are you doing?!
Monica: What do you mean?
Chandler: So what job did you get Joe?
Rachel: Ross, I said I'm sorry like a million times. What do you want me to do? You want me to break my foot too? Okay, I'm gonna break my foot, right here. (Kicks the sign) Ow!! Oh! Oh my God, oh my God! There, are you happy now?!
Joey: Oh what? Like your Mr. Cop!
Phoebe: What?!
Phoebe: What about my cab?
Ross: What?!
Phoebe: That sucks! That's not a trip! I just came from the park! What are we gonna high five about at the stupid Central Park? "Well, it's right by my house, all right!"
Chandler: What would she get for herself for two thousand dollars that she wouldn't tell me about?
Phoebe: What?! What-what-what-what-what?!!
Chandler: Well, this is fascinating. So, uh, what is it about me?
Ross: What?
Rachel: Well Thats yknowThatsWeve been alone for the last twenty minutes were doing okay. Besides yknow what? I-IMaybe we wont be alone, cause lately I-Ithings have been happening between me and Ross, yknow? Right before I went into labor, we-we had this kiss. Yknow? So it might be the the beginning of something.
Frank Sr.: So, what did Francis leave me?
Ross: So uh, what did you tell them about me?
Joey: Hey OK great, what would you do if I did this? (Swings to punch Chandler, he moves and he ends up punching Ross, knocking him off the stool. Ross then gets up and just stares at Joey.)
Monica: What did you just say?
Phoebe: What? Wha-wha-wha-did you do ROSS!
Ross: You know what it's fine. If you're okay with the Barbi thing, so am I.
Monica: What?
Joey: What do you mean? I can do anything, I'm a chameleon! Huh? (he mimes an old man with a beard) I'm old! (then he yawns) I'm tired! (then he mimes someone who's hot...) Hey, I'm hot (...and cold) I'm cold!! Huh?? Come on! What can't I do?
Joey: Whats the matter, Pheebs?
Rachel: Youre lookin at it upside downyknow what? (Grabs the evaluation and throws it out.) It doesnt matter.
Rachel: Oh, that�s what this is all about? Did you bring her up here to get back at me?
Monica: Do you mind telling us what it is?
Ross: (talking to himself) My God! These pants are burning up! (He's still wearing the leather pants.) (She snuggles closer.) Oh come on, she wants to snuggle now! What is she trying to kill me? It's like a volcano in here! (Out loud.) Are you hot?
(As Bonnie goes to do just that, Rachel smiles to herself, proud of what shes done.)
MONICA: What if they get mixed up?
Joey: Well, whats it called?
Monica: What?!
Joey: Well, what did you have?
Joey: What?
Monica and Rachel: What?!
Monica: ...What did I ask?
Chandler: Yes it would. What do you say to $50?
Rachel: Oh really? Like what Monica?
Chandler: (entering) Hey guys, what are you doing?
Chandler: Whats wrong?
Monica: Hold on a second! What is that on her ankle?
Rachel: Well y'know, we have 7 people and like 10 pizzas, what do you think?
Rachel: What?
Rachel: How do you know that? What if it just gets worse and worse and worse, to the point where we cant even be in the same room with each other?!
PHOEBE: What is that sparkly thing?
Monica: Whats fish hooking?
Monica: All right. The super couldnt figure out what it did. A $200 an hour electrician couldnt figure out what it did. Ive had seven pretty serious shocks. I officially give up.
Phoebe: What?! What do you mean youre going to London?
Monica: Deep Impact was the one with Robert Duval, Armageddon is whats going to happen to you if you wake me up.
Ross: (jumping to his feet in anger) What?
Joey: Oh what, wait, wait a second, I mean, what are we doing? Whos going with who?
Ross: Ok, ok, now what is wrong with my Snuggles? What, it says I'm a sensitive, warm kinda guy, you know, like a warm, fuzzy bear. Ok, I can pick something else up on the way.
Janice: Oh! Well, you know what? It probably is.
RACHEL: OK, you know what, are, are you being like, the blind date guy again?
Monica: What are you talking about? (Pointing out the window.) She obviously lives on the second floor, seventh apartment from the left!
Phoebe: Ok, so this is pretty much what's happened so far. Ross was in love with Rachel since, you know, forever, but every time he tried to tell her, something kind of got in the way, like cats, and Italian guys. Finally Chandler was like "forget about her" but when Ross was in China on his dig, Chandler let it slip that Ross was in love with Rachel. She was like, "Oh my god." So she went to the airport to meet him when he came back, but what she didn't know was, that Ross was getting off the plane with another woman. Uh-Oh! So, that's pretty much everything you need to know. But, enough about us. So, how've you been?
Joey: And while were down at the video store, you know what else we could rent? Die Hard! (Chandlers excited.) Oh, yknow what? I just remembered, that Everest thing is only available through mail order.
Chandler: Yeah. Yeah, I mean what, what would we do?