words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, the whole gang is there, Ross is telling a story about what happened at work and the rest of the gang are thinking to themselves, denoted by italics.]
Gunther: What does Rachel see in this guy? I love Rachel. I wish she was my wife.
Chandler: What a wank!
Joey: Guess what?
Ross: What?
Monica: Whats the part?
Joey: Oh, and guess what, I got an audition for All My Children.
Phoebe: Oh, hey, hey Nick the boxer lets see what you got. All right ya, put em up. Come on. (they start shadow boxing)
Dr. Green: This where they put it? What, there no table available in the kitchen! Hello, baby.
Dr. Green: What happened to the library?
Dr. Green: You know whats really good here, the lobster. What do you say shall I just order three.
Dr. Green: What kind of person is allergic to lobster? I guess the kind of person that works at a library.
Dr. Green: (interrupting him) I know!! Its a museum! What, youre the only one around here who can make a joke! At least mine was funny. Ah, waiter, we will have two lobsters and a menu. (nods at Ross, and mouths I dont know to the waiter.)
Dr. Green: They found rust. You know what rust does to a boat?
Dr. Green: (gets his receipt and notices the twenty) What is this? Who put a twenty down here? Huh?
Dr. Green: This is nice. I pay two hundred dollars for dinner, you put down twenty, and you come out looking like Mr. Big Shot. You really want to be Mr. Big Shot? Here, Ill tell you what, you pay the whole bill, Mr. Big Shot, all right. (rips up the bill, and throws it at Ross, then leaves)
Student: Guess what, I got an audition!
Joey: You bet! Whats the part?
Ross: Hey Pheebs, what are you doing?
Monica: (sees the bed) Whats this?
Phoebe: When I was you! Y'know what, its all Joeys fault, cause he left his nose open!
Phoebe: Its Monicas bed. What?
Phoebe: So. This has always been Monicas bed, what youre just noticing now, how self-involved are you?
Dr. Green: Nice hair. Whatd ya do? Swim here?
Rachel: What? What? Hes interested in you. He-he likes your hair, he just wants to know how you got here.
Rachel: What?!
Dr. Green: Ross? Whats with the neck?
Ross: Thank you! Thats what I keep saying.
Dr. Green: What do you need help for?
Rachel: What? Its true, my right leg is two inches shorter.
Ross: What can I do, she doesnt listen to me about renters insurance either.
Dr. Green: Well what if somebody steals something? How are you gonna run after him with one leg shorter than the other?!
Joey: So! Things can go wrong! You dont know! What if he doesnt make it?!
Phoebe: Okay. You know how people need transportation, but they also need massages to help them relax so I just figured we could combine the two, okay, I give the massages and Frank drives! I can fix up the van, bolt the table in the back, and you know what Ive got?
Lowell: I know. That's what I told her.
Rachel: What? Uhh, Phoebe, honey, honey, I know you're quirky and I get a big kick out of it, we all do actually, but if you destroy a coat like this that is like a crime against nature! Not nature, fashion!
Rachel: What about you honey, who would be on your list?
Ross: What?! What?!
Ross: What?! Hows that?
Ross: What was, what was that?
Monica: Whats that?
Monica: You wanna what?!
Pete: What like Pete Dakota?
Jason: What?!
Vince: What?!
(They go around the last row of bookshelves and find a couple doing what college coeds do in secluded corners of university libraries. For those of you who dont know what Im talking about, lets just say that clothing is undone. Ross gasps and the couple gets up and runs away.)
Ross: Well, this is what happens when people live on the edge!
Phoebe: Y'know what you should send him? A cartoon of cigarettes. 'Cause that why he could trade it for protection. No. That's prison.
RUSS: I know what your problem is.
Phoebe: (entering, hurridly) Hey, you guys! Look what I found! Look at this! (She hands Chandler a picture) Thats my Moms writing! Look.
Robin: Why? Why?! Whats wrong with me?!
Amy: Connected? I mean.. to what? She's.. she's a lump.
Phoebe: Okay umm, Id also like to try on the tiara. (The male jeweler hands it to her.) Oh yeah. Okay. (Puts it on.) (To the jeweler) What do you think, too much?
Rachel: Why?! What is it?
Rachel: Oh my God, what happened? (points to the cast on Janice's wrist)
Phoebe: Oh no! Wait! Wait! Okay, yknow what, you were right, you were right. We really werent great at being guys, but you know why? Because were girls.
Joey: Yeah. What are we getting?
Chandler: everything's great, just watching some regular television there, what a pleasant surprise. (She hugs him, and she knows what he was doing so she looks at the TV and sees sharks swimming around thinking Chandler was giving himself a treat to sharks.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Joey is telling Monica what the casting director was trying to get too.]
Ross: Pity food? Y'know what thats okay, all right, I dont need any of you to stay, okay nobody stays.
Phoebe: Okay, so what do you guys really think of Chandler?
Ross: What, what do you mean, what? Is he gay?
Chandler: (to his co-workers) What is with him?
Phoebe: Oh, ok, you know what I don't get? The way guys can do so many mean things, and then not even care.
Phoebe: Yeah, what town are we near?
Pete: What, look back?
Phoebe: Hey you guys, guess what?
Rachel: What?
MONICA: Leon, Leon. Shhh! Guys. Wait, I don't understand. Those steaks were just a gift from the meat vendor. That was not a kick back. I'll just replace them and we can forget the whole thing. What corporate policy? No. Yeah. All right. I just got fired.
Janice: Oh, Im sorry honey, Im so, so, (nasally) haaaaa! Im so, so sorry, I just (nasally) haaaaaa! But I, oh what happened was, I-I-I cant breathe. Can you get me a bag, or something?
Rachel: No Phoebe! You cannot get the phone that way; thats not fair! Okay look, I have an idea. Why dont we, why dont we see what kind of number he has on his speed dial, and then from that we can tell who has more in common with him. And then whoever does gets the phone.
Joey: So what if he didnt come! We can still go out and party ourselves!
Monica: Whats with all this sand? (picking a handful of sand off of the floor, which is covered in sand)
Phoebe: Oh, what? What was it?
Monica: What?!
Rachel: Ask me what?
Monica: What are you crazy?!
Monica: (Comes up for below the covers and looks concerned.) Do you think he knew I was here? (Chandler quickly looks at Monica not knowing what to say.)
Monica: (to Phoebe) So whats Phoebe like?
Joey: What?
Ross: Oh-oh, guess what? I-I have a date with Elizabeth (Talking into Chandler's ear.) Hornswoggle.
Ross: Fine! Its your life! (Starts to storm out mad about his failed attempt at the manipulation of his best friend and sister, but stops and tries one last time.) I just dont want to see you guys break up! Which you will do if you move in together, (Monica and Chandler just stare at him.) but thats what you want, theres nothing I can do. (Opens the door and tries one more time.) DONT DO IT!!!!! (Finally leaves.)
Rachel: What?!
Ross: What happened?
Monica: What?
Bonnie: Hey, what happened to you?
Joey: What?!
Rachel: (startled) Oh!! My God, what are you doing here?
Alice: None the less. Umm, youre too young to, to really know what you want. (They embrace in a passionate kiss.)
Monica: I-I-Im sorry, your-your mouth was full, I didnt hear what you said. Umm, hats off to who now?
Phoebe: You're-you're what?!
Ross: What?
Ross: What?!
Kate: Yeah, thats pretty much what I had in mind.
Phoebe Sr: What?!
Monica: Chandler, what are you doing? That thing can put someones eye out!
Rachel: Whoa! What?! Why?!
Monica: What are you talking about? We�re all together right now.
PHOEBE: Stick a fork what?
Doug: No-no, I heard what you said, funny. I like funny. (Chandler starts to leave) This team is about hard work, but its also about having fun. Good to have you aboard Bing! (smacks him on the butt, and Chandler leaves shocked.)
Rachel: I mean Im probably 98% happy, maybe 2% jealous. And I mean whats 2%? Thats nothing.
Chandler: (looks at what she's holding and shies away) Oh dear God, they gave us glasses!
(Chandler smiles and nods then realizes what hes agreed to.)
Rachel: Go to the post office! I'm sure her picture's up! ...Okay, Monica, y'know what, honey, you're kinda losing it here! I mean, this is really becoming like a weird obsession thing.
CHANDLER: Ahh, I believe my exact words were, 'Flaign,en - sten'. I mean I didn't know what to say, how do you know if you wanna do it on an elevator?
Ross: Hey, what have you guys been up to?
Monica: What?!! Gross!!
Joey: (lying on a beach towel, recapping what happened in the last episode) Okay, so we went to the beach, because Phoebe found out about this lady who knew her mom and dad, and I dont really know what happened with that.
Ross: (stops laughing) What am I doing?
Ross: What happened?
Chandler: (to the girls who are staring at him) What?
Phoebe: Yeah. (BEAT) Oh, I know what we can do. We could set Ross and Rachel up on horrible dates, so that they'll realise how good they are together.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler and Monica are sitting at the kitchen table and are still trying to decide what to do about Janice.]
Ross: What are you doing? Are you trying to hurt me? Or something?
Ross: What happened? Joey?
Rachel: Hey, honey! Whats the matter? (Monica shows her, her hat.) Fine, I was just trying to be nice! Whoa!
Monica: And what are you laughing at, Miss `My-keg-sucking-boyfriend-is-stealing-from-me!'
Rachel: What?!!
Rachel: What? Im not you. This may be the only wedding I ever have. I want it to be amazing.
Chandler: Well, what if all my stuff was here?
[Scene: Phoebes birthday, shes telling everyone what she found out at Ursulas while sitting in Central Perk.]
Chandler: Hey Joe whats up?
ROSS: Rach. OK, forget, forget the lobsters OK. We're, let's talk, what about us?
Ross: What the hell happened on that beach?!
Joey: Oh. What do you do?
Rachel: What?
Joey: What? Whats wrong?
Pete: Wait, wait, wait, wait, thats-thats what youre worried about? If thats the problem, weve got no problem.
Chandler: That's not what I had in mind! See, people like Ross don't generally wear these types of pants. You see, they're very tight. (Motions to Ross's buttock.) Maybe there's something in that area.
Ross: Thanks. (he takes the card) Hey, I know where this place is! It used to be an X-rated video... (pauses when he realizes what he is saying) florist. (he goes away)
RACHEL: Oh give me , , ,� (Phoebe gives Rachel the phone.)� Hi, Mike?� Hi.� Listen.� I know this is a lot to ask, but you know what?� If you do this I . . . Phoebe will . . . do anything you want.� Seriously, I'm talking dirty stuff.
PHOE: Well, I finally took your advice and asked him what was going on.