words in movies
Phoebe: No, no, no. It's not! It's not my mom. It belonged to mom. Yeah, no, she used to put it out every Christmas to remind us, that even though it's Christmas, people still die. And, you can put candy in it. (She grabs the skull, pulls out a stick of licorice, and takes a bite.)
Monica: Are you gonna dress up as Santa?
Rachel: You may need to use this year to teach Ben about Phoebe.
Rachel: (to Monica) Did you know he was in there?
Chandler: Hey, you know what I was thinking? When we get married, are you gonna change your last name to Bing?
Phoebe: (entering) Oh, hey, you guys!
Monica: Ahh, Phoebe, I'm gonna miss you!
Phoebe: Yes, you will be very sad. All right, well I gotta go tell Rachel the good news.
Chandler: Ohh! You guys gonna be living together again?
Phoebe: Why do you think, she's having so much fun living with Joey?
Chandler: No! No, she didn't say that. I-I-I think you should talk to Monica now.
Monica: Phoebe, don't worry about it. I'm sure she wants to live with you.
Phoebe: Probably? Yeah, I don't like that word. (Chandler and Monica look surprised) Kind of what probably really means. Yeah, uh-huh. Yeah, oh, "Your mom probably won't kill herself," yknow? I'm sorry, but I'm not hanging all my hopes of Rachel and I living together on-on "Probably!" Yknow? You gotta take care of yourselves! (She starts to walk out) In this world history teaches us nothing! (Exits)
Joey: Hey! Great, youre home! Guess what Phoebe got me for Christmas! (Starts drumming.)
Monica: I'm sorry. But not that sorry, 'cause you don't have to live with it. Um, we have a reservation under the name Chandler Bing.
Maitre d': Oh-kay, we'll have a table for you in about 45 minutes.
Monica: (pulling Chandler away from the Maitre d') You need to give him money.
Monica: No, to get a table! Places like are always shakin you down. Everybody wants to be paid off.
Chandler: Hey, I can be smooth. (Walks back to the Maitre d', very smoothly) Listen, we're a little bit in a hurry, so, if you can get us a table a little quicker, I'd appreciate it. (Shakes his hand)
Ross: Wooooooo, hehehe. Hey, ahh, you don't feel like you're gonna throw up, do ya?
Ross: Well, I do, so let's... (Ben and Ross sit down on the couch) So, Ben, you uh, you know what holiday is coming up, don't ya?
Ross: Yep, and you know what other holiday is coming up?
Ross: (interrupts him) Okay, that's right, yes, but on Hanukkah, uh, we sing, uh (Sings) Dreidel, dreidel, dreidel, I made you out of clay.
Ross: No! Oh, no-no-no. Hey, you weren't bad, you've been very good, Ben.
Ross: No, hey-hey, come on, (He grabs Ben and sits him on his lap) Ben, Santa is not mad at you, okay? Hey, you're-you're his favorite little guy!
Chandler: How do you know so much about this?
Phoebe: So you like the drums! That's, that's great! Yknow, I was worried, that, you know, they would maybe an unbearable living situation. All right, okay, well, apparently not! So, yay!
Gunther: Here you go.
Chandler: Thank you Gunther, put it there. (He gets up, and shakes Gunther's hand. A bunch of coins fall out his hand. He sits down next to Monica.) Definitely not easier with coins. (Joey gets up and picks up the coins. Chandler thinks, Joey is just helping him to pick them up.) Thank you.
Joey: Thank you. (He gets up and puts on his jacket.) (Phoebe enters) Hey Pheebs!
Joey: Here. (Gives her the coins) Now I only owe you $49.50.
Chandler: If you wanna give Joey a Christmas present that disrupts the entire building, why not get him something a little bit more subtle, like a wrecking ball, or a vile of small pox to release in the hallway?
Phoebe: Yes, thank you. You see, this is how normal people are supposed to react to drums.
Monica: Phoebe, you got Joey drums to annoy Rachel, so she wouldn't wanna live there anymore?
Rachel: Joey, yknow that you could just not throw the sticks up in the air.
Phoebe: (entering with an aquarium covered by a towel) Hey, Joey, I got you another present. (She puts it on the counter)
Joey: Oh wait, before you tell me what it is! (He plays a drum-roll) Okay, what is it?
Rachel: What are you talking about? I love them! (Looks into the cage) Yeah, I had a tarantula when I was a kid. But it-it died, because my cat ate it. And then, then my cat died. But Joey, isn't this cool?
Rachel: And that makes you angry because
Phoebe: Because you would rather live here with Joey.
Rachel: Where did you get that?
Phoebe: Monica and Chandler said that you were having so much fun here. And apparently no amount of drums or tarantulas is gonna change that.
Rachel: Did you get all this stuff for Joey to try and drive me out of the apartment? Honey, if you wanted to do that, you might as well just gotten him a fish, you know how fish freaked me out!
Rachel: It wouldn't have mattered anyway, Phoebe, you and I are, are gonna live together, we're roommates; that's the deal.
Phoebe: Yes, but I wanted you to want to live with me, but okay, if you're having so much fun over here
Rachel: Oh, it's so much more fun with you.
Salesman: Oh. Okay! How can I help you?
Ross: Well, uh, do you have a Santa-outfit left?
Ross: Okay look, do-do, you have anything Christmassy? I promised my son, and I really don't want to disappoint him, um, come on, I uh, you gotta have something.
Ross: I'm the holiday armadillo! I'm a friend of Santa's and he sent me here to wish you (Points to Ben) a Merry Christmas!
Monica: Wow, come in, have a seat. You must be exhausted coming all the way from Texas.
Ross: That's right, Ben. I'm Santa's representative for all the southern states. And Mexico! But, Santa sent me here to give you these presents, Ben. (He tries to bend down to pick up the bag with the presents, but can't because of the costume) Maybe the Lady will help me with these presents.
Ben: Are you for Hanukkah, too? Because I'm part-Jewish.
Ross: (gasps) You are? Me, too!
Ross: (to Monica) You wanna wander in the hall? (to Ben) Ooh, hey Ben, what if the Holiday Armadillo told you all about the festival of lights?
Ross: What are you doing here, Santa?
Chandler: Well, I'm here to see my old buddy Ben. What are you doing here, weird turtle-man?
Ross: I'm the Holiday Armadillo, your part-Jewish friend. You sent me here to give Ben some presents. Remember?
Ben: Did you bring me any presents, Santa?
Chandler: You bet I did, Ben, put it there! (He shakes Ben's hand, but the money falls out of his hands) (to Monica) Well, it would have worked this time, if his hands weren't so damn small! (Realizes, that Ben is standing right there) Ho, ho, ho!
Monica: Okay Ben, why don't you come open some more presents, and Santa, the Armadillo, and I have a little talk in the kitchen? There's a sentence, I never thought I'd say.
Ross: (to Chandler) What are you doing?
Chandler: You called everyone and said you were having trouble finding a Santa costume, so I borrowed one from a guy at work!
Ross: Thank you, but, but you gotta leave.
Monica: (to Chandler) Hey, you think, you can keep it another night? (She has a really teasing look on her face and keeps twirling Chandler's beard.)
Chandler: Well, I'll stay, but only because I wanna hear about Hanukkah. Ben, will you sit here with Santa and learn about Hanukkah?
(Ross mouths to Chandler, "Thank you," and he mouths, "Youre welcome," back.)
Rachel: (returning) Okay, remember uh, remember how you told me that your grandmother put up that wall to make that into two bedrooms?
Rachel: And remember how you always said you were afraid the landlord would find out and then tear it down?
Rachel: Do you really not know where Im going with this? (Phoebe nods, "No.") It left! Its one huge room!
Rachel: You cant, because of the new skylight!
Rachel: Pheebs is your grandmother maybe saying that you should live here alone?
Phoebe: You heard her too?! You have the gift!
Phoebe: Are you sure?
Rachel: Oh please, I hate packing, its closer to work, and we do have fun. Although, Im really gonna miss living with you.
Rachel: I know. (They hug.) Oh-oh, wait did you hear that-hear that? Listen, Im gettin something from your grandmother, she said that since you get to keep the one bedroom apartment you should give Rachel the purple chair?
Rachel: Joey, would you just come out here and stop being such a baby!
Phoebe: Of course not, because youre in love with her.
Monica: Are you a virgin?
Phoebe: Oh before I forget, are you coming to Mike's piano bar tonight?
GUY: What're you doing?
Rachel: Well, it was just something Josh said about v-necks, but you had to be there.
Chandler: You dont have to stop having fun just because Im here. Kathy didnt cheat on all of you. (To Joey) Well, except you. (They hug and Chandler goes into the bathroom with the chick and duck following him.)
Rachel: Ross, things aren't gonna be weird between us, right? I mean was that just the stupidest thing, me telling you that?
Phoebe: Well, why are you doing this anyway?
Monica: Hey, come on Phoebe, you can understand why this would be weird for me.
Joey: Because its all tainted with your betrayal. From now on this apartment is empty for me! And Im not happy about you either. (The bread maker dings) Oh, and just so you know, I made that bread for you. (Joey walks into his bedroom and slams the door.)
Rachel: (with a hurt expression on her face) Okay, but before you go, could you help me first?
RACH: Oh, no, Michael, it's not you. I'm sorry, it's just, it's this thing. It's probably not as bad as it sounds but this friend of mine is, is getting a cat with his girlfriend.
Chandler: No, you don't have to, and you can't because I, I live here too.
ERICA: Sabrina. I know about you two. I saw you today kissing in the doctor's lounge.
MONICA: Oh my god, little Stevie Fisher? How've you been?
Ross: So when do you think youre gonna talk to her?
Larry: Oh, will you mind if I wash up? Because I came straight from work and who knows where these babies (Holds up his hands) have been.
RACHEL: What do you mean?
Monica: Youre getting a crush on your sisters fianc�e.
Joey: So youve been sittin around here all mornin?
PRODUCER: OK Phoebe, you ready to try one?
MONICA: You don't have the guts.
ROSS: Good, 'cause I love you.
Monica: And that's great for you guys, but we want a lawn and a swingset...
Monica: What do you have against the beautiful guest room?
RACHEL: Well I love you too.
Phoebe: OK fine! Please come and support Mike. You don't have to sing.
Rachel: That's great, great. So do you have any questions for us?
Ross: Youve sentenced him?!
Joey: Yeah! Yeah yknow, like warm up the crowd. Ask em where theyre from. Cause in Joey Tribbiani you get a minister and you get an entertainer. Im a minis-tainer! (Rapping) There is no one better! There is no one greater!
Joey: Come on baby, dont go. Please? What do you say?
Chandler: Oh. Oh right! Right! Because youre still seeing him and uh, hes a good guy. I mean, I remember a time when (He fakes falling asleep.)
Chandler: You know, on second thought, gum would be perfection. (Jill gives him a stick of gum, and a strange look) 'Gum would be perfection'? 'Gum would be perfection.' Could have said 'gum would be nice,' or 'I'll have a stick,' but no, no, no, no. For me, gum is perfection. I loathe myself.
ROSS: Well, I'm gonna kiss you.
RACHEL: Well you better.
Joey: Well uh, I don't know about who's here, but I can tell you for damn sure who's not here and that's Rachel!!
MONICA: Wow, all you need now is The Killing Fields and some guacamole and you've got yourself a part-ay.
Monica: (to Chandler) Oh, honey, can you make sure we get a King size bed!
INTERVIEWER: You gonna slice them up real nice?
Alan: Yeah, I'm sorry too. But, I gotta tell you, I am a little relieved.
Joey: Oh, Im sorry. You wanna bite? (Holds his piece out for him.)
MONICA: Did you like it?
Joey: You know, I could like maybe... I could do a dramatic reading of one of her books!
Janine: Thank you. (They kiss.)
Chandler: Okay, I'm gonna go to the bathroom. Will you watch my phone?
RACHEL: Would you guys stop.
Phoebe: Im just saying, get his number just in case. But no Chandler is in an accident and cant perform sexually and he would want you to take a lover to satisfy the needs that he can no longer fulfill.
Emily: Yeah, but it-it-its my whole lifeyou come to England.
Carol: Sorry. You look good too.
Kate: What? So you never went out with an actress before?
Joey: (entering) Hey! You guys! Remember that audition I had a while ago and didnt get the part?
Ross: No, you started it.
Joey: Unless you wanna practice the Foxtrot again? Or-or the Tango?
Monica: Well, at least you scared someone.
Joey: Why do you have to break up with her? Be a man, just stop calling.
Amy: Oh, sweety, you can’t pull this off.
CHANDLER: You don't like that show?
Monica: Joey, did you even interview this woman before you asked her to move in?
Phoebe: I don't care. We're not paying you 300 dollars for this.
Phoebe: You mean in case someone is trying to steal your bamboo sleeping mat or your kettle of fish?
Chandler: Yeah, I think I do! Y'know what? You move in with her! You move in with her right now! Maybe I should in with Monica!
Phoebe: I need to talk to you, its pretty urgent. Its about Monica and Chandler.
Vince: (to Phoebe) Look, I gotta go. I'm on call tonight. (kisses her) See you Saturday. (leaves)
Ross: (in a 5 year olds tone) (To Monica) You are such a tattletale! Mom, Dad, you remember that-that time you walked in my room and smelled marijuana?
Rachel: Youre a pathetic loser, right?
Phoebe Sr.: Well, Im so sorry. I thought I was leaving you with the best parents in the world, I didnt even hear about your Mom and Dad til a couple of years ago, and by then you were already grown up. I dont know, youre here, and I would, I would really, I would like to get to know you.
Phoebe: Joey, you can't make someone do something they don't want to do. Believe me, there's something I've been trying to get Mike to do in bed and there's... he's just...
ROSS: Do you say this stuff to girls?
Kiki: Well, we were in the city shopping, and your mom said you work here, aaand it's true!
Joey: Did you tell the guy you wanted to have sex with his wife and then fall right out of your chair?
Rachel: Ohh, okay, Im sorry. Youre right. Yknow what? We absolutely can stay married, because I was under the impression that the boxes were far away from each other. All right, look, just please, take a moment here and think about what youre asking of me.
Rachel: No, it's just... look, you know, when I first moved to the city I was a lot like her! I was spoiled, self-centered and you guys really took care of me.
Chandler: I mean, don't you think if things were gonna happen with Rachel, they would've happened already?
SUSIE: How you doin there squirmy?
Joey: (muffled by the mouth guard) Hey you guys! Whats happening?
Joey: Ross good, I'm uh glad you're here. I wanna talk to you about something.
Joey: Its Ba-go-ta, but close enough. Now, you can either pass your turn to Ross or pick a Wicked Wango card.
Phoebe: Well, its a long story. Its kind of embarrassing. Lets just say there was a typographical error with a sex manual. (The guy laughs.) How about you?
Joey: Now? You want me to go over there now?
Ross: Come on, would you grow up? Its no big deal.
Ross: No! The guy is mean. I mean really mean. I think you should stay away from him.
Laura: Well, I'm sorry I brought it up. So, are either one of you planning on staying at home with your child... (someone knocks on the door)
RACHEL: Well, there's you.
RACHEL: Well, well um, you know, these movies are offensive and uh, degrading to women and females. And uh, and the lighting's always unflattering. And, Monica help me out here.
MONICA: You really ok with it?
Monica:: what's the big deal, you forgot, she forgot, maybe you were having an off night
Joey: Come on, you guys are more then that! I mean, youre gonna get together right?
Ross: Right, you're not even getting your honeymoon, God.. No, no, although, Aruba, this time of year... talk about your- (thinks) -big lizards... Anyway, if you don't feel like being alone tonight, Joey and Chandler are coming over to help me put together my new furniture.
Joshua: Whats up? Youre voice sounded all squeaky on the phone.
Chandler: (entering) Have you seen Joey?
Monica: Oh my God, it's gonna WORK! We're gonna make it work! I'm gonna be a mummy and (to Chandler) you're gonna be a daddy! All right, I'll see you suckers. I'm gonna get me... A BABY! {she leaves)
Joey: That's OK, Ross, you can ask me. What?
Chandler: I'm telling ya! It's gonna happen. Next year it's gonna be you, me and the little Hemingway Bing. (pause) What, he's my favourite author!
JOEY: Man you are incredible.
RICHARD: Uh, Phoebe, I don't think your mom would want you to see what's about to happen.
Mr. Geller: Don't listen to your mother. You're independent, and you always have been! Even when you were a kid... and you were chubby, and you had no friends, you were just fine! And you would read alone in your room, and your puzzles...
Phoebe: (To Joey) You ate meat! (Joey is shocked) (To Chandler and Monica) You had sex! (Theyre shocked.)
Ross: Oh, come on, now you know you want em.
ROSS: Oh. And what do you call that?
Joey: Yeah well thats because uh I stayed in my room. Yeah, you dont want to look in my hamper.