words in movies
Phoebe: (laughs harder) You make it so funny.
Joey: (going over and picking up the rod) Thats all right. Hey you guys, you know whats going to be great about the fishing trip this year? When my dad gets me out in the middle of the lake and gives me that, "Joey, what are you doing with your life?" stuff. I can say, "Well, Im doing a movie with Charlton Heston dad. What are you doing with your life?"
Chandler: You dont have to stop having fun just because Im here. Kathy didnt cheat on all of you. (To Joey) Well, except you. (They hug and Chandler goes into the bathroom with the chick and duck following him.)
Monica: Hey, Joey, I dont think that you should leave Chandler alone. I mean its only been two days since he broke up with Kathy. Maybe you can go fishing next week?
Chandler: (opening the bathroom door and kicking out the chick and duck) Would you give me one minute!! Please.
Joshua: So, these will match the jacket you picked out for me last week?
Joshua: (turning around) Oh! You know what I need?
Rachel: Oh, okay. Uhh, well lets see. (Grabs his hand.) Youre aboutwell uh, this one is large. And this one(Grabs the other hand.)
Mr. Waltham: I-I was wondering, my niece you see is in from Londonwell Shropshire really but yknowwell shes about your age I say. Anyway I have tickets for the opera, Die Fledermaus, and I was wondering if youd like to keep her company this evening?
Rachel: Sure. You got it. Great!
Mr. Waltham: Ohh! Yes of course, thank you, thank you, thank you so very much.
Joshua: But, I was curious; do you have any plans for tonight?
Joshua: I invested in this night-club and its opening tonight, would you like to come?
Joshua: Youre into hardcore S&M right?
Joshua: Kidding! (Rachel is relived) Im gonna get there early, but Im going to put you on the V.I.P list, okay? Look for me.
Rachel: Yeah, great, you betcha!
Mr. Waltham: For you and Emily, tonight, Die Fledermaus.
Mr. Waltham: I think youll like it, it has two out of the three tenors.
Chandler: Yknow, I cant believe Kathy did this too me. I really, thought that she was the one. I tell you what, from now on Im never getting out of this chair, ever! Okay? From now on, this chair is the one! You wanna what else is the one? My sweat pants!
Joey: Oh my God, you guys have no idea.
Monica: You stink!
Ross: Are you kidding?!
Rachel: Ohh, its Joshua invited me to this fancy club opening tonight. But, I already told Mr. Waltham that I would take his niece to this dumb old opera. So What are you gonna do?
Rachel: Ohh, gosh. You guys, come on, this isI have to meet Joshua! This is my one chance for him to see the fun Rachel. Yknow the "Wouldnt it be great if she was my wife" Rachel. Ohh, all right! Are Joey and Chandler back?
Monica: No, Chandlers still in Phase One, and Joeys that thing you smell.
Ross: You want me to take some girl Ive never met to the opera so you can go to a club and flirt with some guy, hmm, that-that is a toughie.
Monica: (looking out the peephole) Ohh, shes looking down the hall. Oh! She looked right at me! Oh wait, you cant see people through that little hole, can you? (Goes back to the door.) Hello!
Rachel: Oh thank you! Thank you, thank you, thank you! (Monica opens the door.) Emily?
Emily: Oh, no-no-no, thats not rude! Its perfectly in keeping with a trip that Ive already been run down by one of your wiener carts, and been strip-searched at John F. Kennedy Airport, apparently to you people, I look like someone whos got a balloon full of cocaine stuffed up their bum.
Monica: I-I-I think you look great.
Emily: Good night, it was very nice to meet you all. (Storms out.)
Phoebe: Dont you just love the way they talk?!
Monica: Oh wait, Joey, you cant go like that! You stink!
Phoebe: Ohh! So, did you get to meet her?
Monica: So you hit her in the face?
Rachel: Honey, thats youre name.
Monica: Hey! Youre wearing pants!
Ross: When we first met her, she was soaking, her feet were wet! Who wouldnt be miserable? Im telling you when I got her into a dry pair of shoes, she was a totally different person.
Monica: Why do you care so much anyway?
Rachel: I dont care! All right, yknow what Im just upset that Im getting nowhere with Joshua thatyknow what still, you do not meet someone and go flitting off to Vermont!
Monica: Well, when you first met Barry, you flitted off to Vail.
Rachel: Oh, yknow, would you just for once, not remember every little thing!! (Storms out.)
Monica: What are you doing?! Chandler! You cant just go back a phase!
Chandler: Yes you can. Youre thinking about time, you cant go back in time.
Phoebe: Well, look, why dont you just, why dont you do your Phase Two strip club thing with us.
Chandler: (laughs) No you cant.
Chandler: You dont want to be guys, youd be all hairy and wouldnt live as long. (Starts to go to his bedroom)
Phoebe: Yknow you, you just stop being such a wuss and get those off and you come with us and watch naked girls dance around!!
The A.D: You.
Joey: Yknow, I can see why you think that, but ah, actually, you know who I think it is?
The A.D: You?
Monica: (coming back to the stage and sitting next to Chandler) Okay, Ive got some Ones, you wanna put them in her panties?
Phoebe: Oh, no umm, hi, that-that, you have to put that out, cause Im pregnant.
The Cigarette Smoking Guy: (No, not the Cigarette Smoking Man from The X-Files.) Well, maybe you and your baby should go to another strip club.
Rachel: (joining them) Well, I just checked our messages and Joshua didnt call. I mean youd think hed be worried about me not showing up at his club. Ugh, you know what makes it so much worse, Ross is all happy in Vermont!
Phoebe: Come on! Look where you are!!
Monica: (to the waitress) When you get a sec, another round of daiquiris.
Phoebe: Well, if you think it will help.
Chandler: No! That was a test! In a couple of hours Im gonna get really drunk and wanna call Kathy and you guys are gonna have to stop me! And then after that, Im gonna get so drunk, Im gonna wanna call Janice
Phoebe: You should! How is she?
Charlton Heston: Who in the hell are you?
Joey: I guess you wouldnt believe me if I said I was Kurt Douglas, huh?
Joey: No-no-no, no, no, wait. You see, Im an actor, Joey Tribbiani, Im doing a scene with you today, and well, I stink.
Charlton Heston: (shocked) Youre in this picture?
Joey: Yeah-yeah, Im one of the cops that wont work with you cause you a lose cannon. Anyway, look, Im really sorry, but I stink!
Joey: Oh no-no-no, you dont understand
Charlton Heston: I dont know one actor worth his salt that didnt say at one time or another, "God, I stink!" Hell, I just did a scene out there, first take, I stunk the place up. But, the important thing you must remember, no matter how badly you think you might stink, you must never, ever bust into my dressing room and use my shower! Do you understand me?!
Chandler: Oh yeah, that was great. Thanks to you, the hottest cocktail waitress there is quitting to teach the third grade!
Phoebe: Oh no! Wait! Wait! Okay, yknow what, you were right, you were right. We really werent great at being guys, but you know why? Because were girls.
Phoebe: And do you know what girls are really good at?
Phoebe: No, listening! Sit! Yknow, maybe it would just really, really help if you would just talk.
Monica: Yeah. And yknow, if you wanna cry, thats okay too.
Chandler: Okay, look, Im gonna have to ask you all to leave.
Chandler: I am totally picturing you with all those women!
Chandler: Stop it! Youre killing me! I think I just moved on to Phase Four!
Chandler: I know, I know, but youre gonna have plenty of chances. There are literally thousands of women out there just waiting to screw me over.
Ross: Emily is incredible. I mean there-there are no words to describe it, I mean the whole weekend was like a dream. (Sees Rachel coming back from the bathroom.) Oh! And you! Rach!
Ross: Hey! You were so right!
Ross: Uh, what you said, about us being in a place where we could finally be happy for each other.
Ross: I mean, I, I-I admit I-I wasnt quite there. Yknow, I mean the thought of you and that-that Josh guy
Ross: But now! Im there! Im totally there! Im-Im finally where you are!
Ross: Yeah, and-and thank you for Emily.
Rachel: Oh, no problem. Im so glad I could help. Happy for you. (She playfully punches him.)
Ross: Happy for you. (He punches her back.)
Rachel: No, happy for you! (Hits him harder.)
Chandler: All right ladies, heres what were gonna do. (Points to a stripper.) You are gonna take off my clothes. (To another two strippers) You two, go get the oils. (To another stripper) And you just constantly scream at the top of your voice, "Chandlers the king! Chandlers the king!"
Chandler: Come on! Would you please pay attention, I could wake up at any moment!
Chandler: What do you want from me, Ive never met the guy. So anyway, Rachel, Im sorry you cant stay, (Rachel is upset about leaving the orgy with the cigarette guy.) but the rest of us have a lot of work to do. (The cigarette guy starts rubbing Chandlers back.) What are you doing? (The guy just nods) All right, listen, Ive got to wake up!
Chandler: Youre right.
Phoebe: Yeah, and maybe that youre a real (She says something in Italian, and it doesnt matter what she said. Its not important so I dont need everyone who speaks Italian telling me what she said.)
Joey: (pause) You pushed him!
Chandler: You know the hotels?
Monica: Well, this is the last box of your clothes. I’m just gonna label it, "What were you thinking?"
Joey: Yeah, it is! You wouldnt have lost the ring, right? Yknow what, Ross you were right from the start, he (Chandler) should be your best man.
Phoebe: Ross, its not that big a deal! So youll been divorced three times, youll still have a life, youll go on dates
JOEY: Ohh, you know what it is? It's smudgy 'cause they're fax pages. Now when I was on Days of Our Lives as Dr. Drake Remoray, they'd send over the whole script on real paper and everything.
Phoebe: It will be in a minute. Listen, Tim youre a really great guy.
Gary: So you know what I'm talking about, right?
The Girls: You put your balloons down!!
Joey: You really should have been more clear about that!
Rachel: Youre welcome.
Monica: Yeah youre right. I dont know what I was thinking.
Phoebe: Oh Joey, Im so sorry. You want some of my breakfast?
Dr. Franzblau: No, no, really. I suppose it's because I spend so much time, you know, where I do.
Joey: Are you bachelors?
Joey: Yeah, youre great! Okay, lets take it from
The Vampire: Buffay, are you going to plunge your stake into my dark places?
Joey: Well, you lied again! (Rachel comes out of her room and is observing the conversation)
Joey: (leaning down to her) Maybe youll order a little sangria?
Joanna: (answering the phone) Yes. (listens) Uh, cant you wait until tomorrow? (listens) All right. (hangs up) Unbelievable!!
Monica: You just carry that around?
Rachel: Oh thank you, Chandler, this is so great, shes gonna love me.
Monica: What were you doing in Africa?
Rachel: All right, wherever you wanna go is cool.
Phoebe: Thank you. (To Gunther, who's standing there frozen) Okay, go! Go! Go! (He runs off.) (To Larry) Now, if after dinner you still really need to bust someone, I know a hot dog vendor who picks his nose.
Joey: The big deal is that it is the exact equal distance from the bathroom to the kitchen and its at the perfect angle so you dont get any glare coming of off Stevie.
Phoebe: I did it! One mile on a hippity-hop! Thats it!! Thats everything I wanted to do before I was thirty. Oh, except I wanted to patch things up with my sister. But oh well. Yay!! (They all cheer again.) And-and girls this thing is a Godsend if you know what I mean. (Rachel and Monica look intrigued and as they all head into Central Perk, Rachel picks up the hippity-hop that Phoebe left behind.)
Chandler: I'm telling you, he's great! I mean, even if my sperm worked fine, I'd think he'd be the way to go!
Rachel: Oh, so you just sort of happened to leave it in here?
Rachel: Let me, let me get you some wine!
Conan: But audiencesYou have a live studio audience and they must love that. They must love it when they see you guys playing.
MONICA: No no. See, in my bedroom I set my clock six minutes fast. You wanna know why?
Phoebe: Oh, 19! We thought you said 90!
Joey: You guys dont think I look 19?
Chandler: So we thought we'd throw you little going away party around seven.
Ross: Are you kidding? Okay, look. I-I studied evolution. Remember, evolution? Monkey into man? Plus, Im a doctor, and I had a monkey. Im Doctor Monkey!
PHOEBE: (calling from the bar on her cell phone.) Hey, Mike, it's me.� Listen, is um, is Ross near you?
Mr. Waltham: Dont take that tone with me. (She looks evilly at him.) All-all right you can. (He looks over at Ross and Shrugs.)
Rachel: (To Monica) Yeah, youre on your own.
Chandler: You look great!
Chandler: You okay over there?
Monica:: Here why don't you sit down, get yourself comfortable because I. (Monica shows him the tape then puts it in) have a little surprise for you.
Chandler: Yeah Ross, I mean... we're excited to hear the speech but the rest of the time we're gonna wanna do, you know, "island's stuff".
Rachel: (entering from Chandlers bedroom, I guess, and sees the foosball table.) Oh my God! I cant believe you guys are actually think youre moving in here!
Ross: You mean, weyou and me?
Ross: Honey, I love you too.
Ross: You okay?
Rachel: Because, I cant! Ross, I told you, no. I cant.
Monica: You did a minute ago!
Ross: C'mon, you get the idea, ow-ow-ow we'll make our money back in no time!
Mona: Ross, what are you doing?!
Monica: Youre jealous of Princess Caroline?
Rachel: (still trapped under Ross) Pheebs, could you maybe hand me a cracker?
Tag: Look Rachel, I know what youre going through. Im totally freaked about turning 25.
Chandler: You know, I - I think you're set with the poultry.
Mr. Zelner: Umm, no. Thanks, but Ill give these to Betty. (Rachel glances at Tag to say, "See?") So I read your evaluation of Tag, or to use his full name, Tag Sweetcheeks Jones. Is something going on with you two?
Chandler: Shes moving on! Okay, if its not this guy, its gonna be somebody else! And unless youre thinking about subletting my peep hole, you are going to have to get used to the fact that the relationship is over! Okay, man? Its over.
Rachel: I dont know. Do-do you have any clothes on?
Ross: You still love me?
Monica: (crying) I'd do anything for you. (They hug again.)
RACHEL: Hi, hi can I help you?
Rachel: Joey, you are not! Youre 31.
Chandler: Yes, you can pass for 19.
Phoebe: I dont know, I dont know, I dont know. You know, I mean, on the one hand, Mother may I? But yknow on the other hand No. No, I cant. Were friends. No, oh, no. I dont want to risk what we have.
Rachel: Wow, Monica, I love that, you really have faith in me. Thank you. Technical question, how do you know when uh, the butters done?
Joey: Well, I guess youre right. Maybe, maybe Ill take her down to the incinerator. Its gonna be so said, and kinda cool. (He goes to remove the back, but it doesnt come off. So he sits down in it, puts his feet up, stands up, and looks back at it.) Shes heeled!
Monica: I love you!
Phoebe: Well, you know that psychic I see?
Rachel: Okay. Uhh, Ross, y'know what, there's something that I-that I have to talk to you about and everybody's saying that I shouldn't tell you, but I think they're wrong. I mean, and you know how people can be wrong.
Chandler: You mean the spitter?
Monica: (to Phoebe) You know it's funny, the last time Paulo was here, my hair was so much shorter and cuter.
Phoebe: Dont worry, well find you someone else.
Rachel: Monica, what are you talking about?
Ross: You know, I really don't want to get involved in you guy's relationship.
Joey: You ah, you forgot your shoes.
MRS GREEN: You didn't marry your Barry. I did.
Tag: Why? What youd do?
Monica: What do you mean?
Joey: Look, Ross, really its-its no big deal. Yknow you wear a white coat, I wear a blue blazer, if that means we cant be friends at work, then so be it. Yknow, hey I understand. Yknow? Hey, when Im in a play and youre in the audience, I dont talk to you, right? So its yknow, its uh, its cool. Ill see you tomorrow. (Leaves)
Joey: (answering the door.) Hey, how did you do that?! Come on in. (He brings them inside.)
Phoebe: Oh thank you.
Joey: Oh, hold up, I'll walk out with you. Now, Rach, when she taught you to kiss, you were at camp, and.. were you wearing any kinda little uniform, or- (Rachel exits and slams the door in his face.) That's fine, yeah...
Joey: All right. But, youre gonna have to tell them. (He opens the cabinet to reveal the chick and the duck living inside with Christmas lights and a disco ball as decorations.)
MONICA: Where have you been?
Joey: (nodding knowingly) Now youre thinking you gotta sleep with him.
Chandler: I just want you to know that what you witnessed in there, that wasnt for fun.
Ross: (To Chandler) You dont think its a little crazy that you get all my points just cause you
Rachel: Its not dumb. But, maybe its okay that youre not a part of it. Y'know what I mean? (Ross looks confused) I mean its like, I-I-I like that youre not involved in that part of my life.
Joey: Yeah, shes been out there for twenty minutes, Im surprised you didnt hear her on the way over.
Monica: You came?!
Ross: Just showing you my run-of-the-mill-slice-it-right-off third nipple.
Phoebe: Because I was ashamed ok? I sold out for the cash! And then they give me benefits like medical, and dental, and a 401K. But you know... you pay a price. Now I'm this Corporate stooge and punching a clock and Ugh! paying taxes!
Gary: Hey, honey! Okay, so did you find any apartments? Anything in Brooklyn Heights?
Chandler: Uh, Joey is gonna be right back. Right back! (Tries to pantomime it for her.) Meanwhile, let's-let's-let's talk about you. (Pause.) So, you're old and small.
Ross: Phoebe, what are you doing?
Phoebe: (calling from her room) Are you under the sheet?
Ross: Phoebe, you said it was urgent!
Emily: You were amazing out there.