words in movies
Phoebe: (laughs harder) You make it so funny.
Joey: (going over and picking up the rod) Thats all right. Hey you guys, you know whats going to be great about the fishing trip this year? When my dad gets me out in the middle of the lake and gives me that, "Joey, what are you doing with your life?" stuff. I can say, "Well, Im doing a movie with Charlton Heston dad. What are you doing with your life?"
Chandler: You dont have to stop having fun just because Im here. Kathy didnt cheat on all of you. (To Joey) Well, except you. (They hug and Chandler goes into the bathroom with the chick and duck following him.)
Monica: Hey, Joey, I dont think that you should leave Chandler alone. I mean its only been two days since he broke up with Kathy. Maybe you can go fishing next week?
Chandler: (opening the bathroom door and kicking out the chick and duck) Would you give me one minute!! Please.
Joshua: So, these will match the jacket you picked out for me last week?
Joshua: (turning around) Oh! You know what I need?
Rachel: Oh, okay. Uhh, well lets see. (Grabs his hand.) Youre aboutwell uh, this one is large. And this one(Grabs the other hand.)
Mr. Waltham: I-I was wondering, my niece you see is in from Londonwell Shropshire really but yknowwell shes about your age I say. Anyway I have tickets for the opera, Die Fledermaus, and I was wondering if youd like to keep her company this evening?
Rachel: Sure. You got it. Great!
Mr. Waltham: Ohh! Yes of course, thank you, thank you, thank you so very much.
Joshua: But, I was curious; do you have any plans for tonight?
Joshua: I invested in this night-club and its opening tonight, would you like to come?
Joshua: Youre into hardcore S&M right?
Joshua: Kidding! (Rachel is relived) Im gonna get there early, but Im going to put you on the V.I.P list, okay? Look for me.
Rachel: Yeah, great, you betcha!
Mr. Waltham: For you and Emily, tonight, Die Fledermaus.
Mr. Waltham: I think youll like it, it has two out of the three tenors.
Chandler: Yknow, I cant believe Kathy did this too me. I really, thought that she was the one. I tell you what, from now on Im never getting out of this chair, ever! Okay? From now on, this chair is the one! You wanna what else is the one? My sweat pants!
Joey: Oh my God, you guys have no idea.
Monica: You stink!
Ross: Are you kidding?!
Rachel: Ohh, its Joshua invited me to this fancy club opening tonight. But, I already told Mr. Waltham that I would take his niece to this dumb old opera. So What are you gonna do?
Rachel: Ohh, gosh. You guys, come on, this isI have to meet Joshua! This is my one chance for him to see the fun Rachel. Yknow the "Wouldnt it be great if she was my wife" Rachel. Ohh, all right! Are Joey and Chandler back?
Monica: No, Chandlers still in Phase One, and Joeys that thing you smell.
Ross: You want me to take some girl Ive never met to the opera so you can go to a club and flirt with some guy, hmm, that-that is a toughie.
Monica: (looking out the peephole) Ohh, shes looking down the hall. Oh! She looked right at me! Oh wait, you cant see people through that little hole, can you? (Goes back to the door.) Hello!
Rachel: Oh thank you! Thank you, thank you, thank you! (Monica opens the door.) Emily?
Emily: Oh, no-no-no, thats not rude! Its perfectly in keeping with a trip that Ive already been run down by one of your wiener carts, and been strip-searched at John F. Kennedy Airport, apparently to you people, I look like someone whos got a balloon full of cocaine stuffed up their bum.
Monica: I-I-I think you look great.
Emily: Good night, it was very nice to meet you all. (Storms out.)
Phoebe: Dont you just love the way they talk?!
Monica: Oh wait, Joey, you cant go like that! You stink!
Phoebe: Ohh! So, did you get to meet her?
Monica: So you hit her in the face?
Rachel: Honey, thats youre name.
Monica: Hey! Youre wearing pants!
Ross: When we first met her, she was soaking, her feet were wet! Who wouldnt be miserable? Im telling you when I got her into a dry pair of shoes, she was a totally different person.
Monica: Why do you care so much anyway?
Rachel: I dont care! All right, yknow what Im just upset that Im getting nowhere with Joshua thatyknow what still, you do not meet someone and go flitting off to Vermont!
Monica: Well, when you first met Barry, you flitted off to Vail.
Rachel: Oh, yknow, would you just for once, not remember every little thing!! (Storms out.)
Monica: What are you doing?! Chandler! You cant just go back a phase!
Chandler: Yes you can. Youre thinking about time, you cant go back in time.
Phoebe: Well, look, why dont you just, why dont you do your Phase Two strip club thing with us.
Chandler: (laughs) No you cant.
Chandler: You dont want to be guys, youd be all hairy and wouldnt live as long. (Starts to go to his bedroom)
Phoebe: Yknow you, you just stop being such a wuss and get those off and you come with us and watch naked girls dance around!!
The A.D: You.
Joey: Yknow, I can see why you think that, but ah, actually, you know who I think it is?
The A.D: You?
Monica: (coming back to the stage and sitting next to Chandler) Okay, Ive got some Ones, you wanna put them in her panties?
Phoebe: Oh, no umm, hi, that-that, you have to put that out, cause Im pregnant.
The Cigarette Smoking Guy: (No, not the Cigarette Smoking Man from The X-Files.) Well, maybe you and your baby should go to another strip club.
Rachel: (joining them) Well, I just checked our messages and Joshua didnt call. I mean youd think hed be worried about me not showing up at his club. Ugh, you know what makes it so much worse, Ross is all happy in Vermont!
Phoebe: Come on! Look where you are!!
Monica: (to the waitress) When you get a sec, another round of daiquiris.
Phoebe: Well, if you think it will help.
Chandler: No! That was a test! In a couple of hours Im gonna get really drunk and wanna call Kathy and you guys are gonna have to stop me! And then after that, Im gonna get so drunk, Im gonna wanna call Janice
Phoebe: You should! How is she?
Charlton Heston: Who in the hell are you?
Joey: I guess you wouldnt believe me if I said I was Kurt Douglas, huh?
Joey: No-no-no, no, no, wait. You see, Im an actor, Joey Tribbiani, Im doing a scene with you today, and well, I stink.
Charlton Heston: (shocked) Youre in this picture?
Joey: Yeah-yeah, Im one of the cops that wont work with you cause you a lose cannon. Anyway, look, Im really sorry, but I stink!
Joey: Oh no-no-no, you dont understand
Charlton Heston: I dont know one actor worth his salt that didnt say at one time or another, "God, I stink!" Hell, I just did a scene out there, first take, I stunk the place up. But, the important thing you must remember, no matter how badly you think you might stink, you must never, ever bust into my dressing room and use my shower! Do you understand me?!
Chandler: Oh yeah, that was great. Thanks to you, the hottest cocktail waitress there is quitting to teach the third grade!
Phoebe: Oh no! Wait! Wait! Okay, yknow what, you were right, you were right. We really werent great at being guys, but you know why? Because were girls.
Phoebe: And do you know what girls are really good at?
Phoebe: No, listening! Sit! Yknow, maybe it would just really, really help if you would just talk.
Monica: Yeah. And yknow, if you wanna cry, thats okay too.
Chandler: Okay, look, Im gonna have to ask you all to leave.
Chandler: I am totally picturing you with all those women!
Chandler: Stop it! Youre killing me! I think I just moved on to Phase Four!
Chandler: I know, I know, but youre gonna have plenty of chances. There are literally thousands of women out there just waiting to screw me over.
Ross: Emily is incredible. I mean there-there are no words to describe it, I mean the whole weekend was like a dream. (Sees Rachel coming back from the bathroom.) Oh! And you! Rach!
Ross: Hey! You were so right!
Ross: Uh, what you said, about us being in a place where we could finally be happy for each other.
Ross: I mean, I, I-I admit I-I wasnt quite there. Yknow, I mean the thought of you and that-that Josh guy
Ross: But now! Im there! Im totally there! Im-Im finally where you are!
Ross: Yeah, and-and thank you for Emily.
Rachel: Oh, no problem. Im so glad I could help. Happy for you. (She playfully punches him.)
Ross: Happy for you. (He punches her back.)
Rachel: No, happy for you! (Hits him harder.)
Chandler: All right ladies, heres what were gonna do. (Points to a stripper.) You are gonna take off my clothes. (To another two strippers) You two, go get the oils. (To another stripper) And you just constantly scream at the top of your voice, "Chandlers the king! Chandlers the king!"
Chandler: Come on! Would you please pay attention, I could wake up at any moment!
Chandler: What do you want from me, Ive never met the guy. So anyway, Rachel, Im sorry you cant stay, (Rachel is upset about leaving the orgy with the cigarette guy.) but the rest of us have a lot of work to do. (The cigarette guy starts rubbing Chandlers back.) What are you doing? (The guy just nods) All right, listen, Ive got to wake up!
Chandler: Are you kidding me?! Joey. Joey! Joey! Joey! Joey! Joey! Joey! Joey! Joey! Joey!!
Ross: Now, if you wanna try to make some of it back, Id be glad to play you for it. But I should warn you, I am very good at Cups.
CAROLINE: You know, my brother and his boyfriend have been trying to adopt for three years. What agency did you two go through?
CHANDLER: Takin' that with you, huh?
Phoebe: Wow. Okay, I dont know how to talk to you.
Ross: Well, you know, I'd feel a whole lot better if you got dressed now.
Cliff: And then you tried to make me think that I was crazy.
RACHEL: (singing) "...marenge, thank you honey, and do the cha-cha. And while she like to be a star, Tony always tended bar. At the, wait, wait, everybody.."
Chandler: And I love the milk! But, Im not gonna some British girl to move in with me! (Realizes that made no sense.) Joey, you say things now.
Phoebe: Um, oh, I got you a birthday present.
Monica: Are you insane? I mean Joey, is going to kill you, hes actually going to kill you dead.
Rachel: Amy! Hi! Oh-oh-hoh! (they hug) Wow! You remember Joey?
Joey: Yeah! In fact, to prove how much you mean to me, (He unwraps the sandwich and holds it out for Chandler) here.
Sandy: You know, I can't tell it again... (wipes his tears again)
Chandler: Monica, could you excuse us for a second? I need to talk to the girl with the flowers.
Rachel: So, how are you?
Monica: Why are you reading this? You hate this kind of stuff.
Rachel: Oh, you're not gonna tell the whole story about how your parents got divorced again are you?
Luisa: Ah, it's not so much you, you were fat, you had your own problems. (To Rachel) But you? What a bitch!
Monica: Wow, being dumped by you obviously agrees with her.
Joey: Okay look, look, let me ask you a question, when they were doing it on stage, was it like really hot?
Emily: I packed while you were gone. I left some knickers under your pillow.
Monica: You know what would be real weird? Is if you werent there. Just say youll think about it, okay?
Mona: How many did you want? Im getting a hundred.
Phoebe Sr: Well, because youd be giving up a baby, and I-I really dontI dont know if theres anything I can say that could make you understand the pain of giving up a baby. So, umm, (Picks up a puppy in the box next to the couch.)
RICHARD: If kids is what I takes to be with you then kids it is.
Rachel: (entering) Hey Ross? Umm, I just ran into Caitlin in the hallway and-and uh, you must be getting better at this flirting stuff than I thought.
Rachel: Chandler! Youre smoking? What are you doing?!
Monica: (To Phoebe) Oh my God, my ass is sweating! (on phone) Please! Please! Can you come? Its today at four.
Phoebe: Okay, just tell me this, did you or did you not smell her hair?
Phoebe: Oh, hi Max! Hey, do you know everybody?
Ross: There you go.
Ross: Okay, okay, yes, it is. (waves) How about I'll, uh, catch up with you in the Ice Age.
Rachel: Oh my god. Ok you guys, theres Danny. Watch. Just watch this. (He walks past the couch to the counter.) See?! Still pretending hes not interested. Ohh, hes coming over. Just pretend like we dont know him. Weve forgotten who he is.
Phoebe: Huh? Can you just imagine getting down on one knee and handing her this gorgeous piece of weaponry?
Joey: Actually, y'know its kinda cold, so how about I keep my boxers on, and give you all a peek at the good stuff?
Chandler: Will you excuse me I have to um..... (walks to the hall)
Rachel: That's what I said! Thank you for being so nice. (They hug.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Ross are in the kitchen, Rachel and Monica are sitting in the living room, and Phoebe is, you guessed it, still on hold.]
MR. GREENE: Did you know your mother spent $1200 dollars on bansai trees. I felt like Gulliver around that place.
Joey: (obviously cold) Hey, can you close that window Chandler? My nipples can cut glass over here!
Monica: Is it something youd be interested in?
Ross: You're right, you're right, it is...So you gonna invite us all to the big opening?
Mr. Geller: So you don't wanna go to Williamsburg?
Rachel: So honey, what are you gonna do about the little girl?
Rachel: Whoops. (Starts to go into Chandler and Joeys.) Oh, hey, do you need help with that?
Realtor: You two know each other?
Chandler: Youve got it. (he starts to look at his sisters, but he still doesnt know which one is Mary-Angela.)
Rachel: What are you doing here?
MONICA: You know what. Tomorrow I'm gonna do your clocks.
Joey: Come on Treeger, dont say that. You just ahh, you just need more practice. Here, come on, lets ahh, lets try it again. Come on. (they start dancing again) Plus, it was, it was probably mostly my fault, anyway. I mean, yknow, Im not really that comfortable dancing with a(Treeger throws him) We-he!! Hey!
PHOEBE: Yes, yes, and it's, and we always have to go to, you know, someplace nice, you know? God, and it's not like we can say anything about it, 'cause, like this birthday thing, it's for Ross.
Monica: Hey, hey, look. Look Ross, Ben drew a picture of you! (Shows him Ben's picture.) Huh? You're-you're a cowboy!
Chandler: What rule? There's no rule, if anything, you owe me a table!
Charlie: Oh God! I am so sorry, but... (she puts her hand on Ross's cheek) I mean it's... there's so much history between us, you know...
Isabella: Arent you with that girl over there? (points at Rachel, who waves back)
MONICA: Who da wenny-Benny boy? You the Wenny-wenny-Benny-Benny boy, yes. Don't cry. Don't cry. Why is he still crying?
EDDIE: Ok, then I want to hear you say it, I, I want to hear you say you want me out.
BIG BULLY: You got a problem with that?
Phoebe: Thanks you guys! Thank you.
Ross: Eh..actually no, I don't need to because your little "Ross is dead" joke didn't work, ok, there were no responses. Nobody posted anything on the website, nobody called my parents, so the joke my friend is on you. Nobody called, nobody wrote anything, nobody cares that I'm dead. (silence) Oh my God! Nobody cares that I'm dead!?
Phoebe: No, I know. That's a part of the whole, you know, them-not-liking-you-extravaganza.
Rachel: Well, because she loves you and because you love her.
Rachel: Everything you need to know is in that first kiss.
Rachel: No Phoebe! I just need you there for support. I havent told him Im pregnant yet.
Joey: Well, that's pretty good. But you might wanna tone it down a little.
The Stripper: Okay, which one of you guys is Gunther Central-Perk? (Sees Joey.) Hey, Joey?
MONICA: Ya know, you had no right to go out with him.
PHOEBE: Chandler, you gotta stop staring at the door. It's like a watched pot, you know if you keep looking at it then the door is to, never gonna boil. I think what you have to do is try not to...
Phoebe: Why do you care?
Chandler: No, no, no, you say that proudly.
ROSS: Well I guess you can start by drivin a cab on Another World.
{Transcibers note: In case you havent heard, Courteney Cox got married to David Arquette during hiatus and changed her name to Courteney Cox Arquette. But David was a busy boy during the off season for not only did he marry but everyone else as well. For theyre all listed as Jennifer Aniston Arquette, Lisa Kudrow Arquette, in an interesting twist Matt LeBlanc Arquette, Matthew Perry Arquette, David Schwimmer Arquette, and even the creators of the show are now David Crane Arquette and Marta Kauffman Arquette. I just wonder what the new sleeping arrangements are }
Phoebe: Monica, if you get five cool points, you get to make somebody take off one item of clothing. It hasnt happened yet, but were all very excited.
Chandler: Youre gonna be carrying their baby and give them a Sony Play Station?
Ross: Joeys asking if youve just ruined the first book hes ever loved that didnt star Jack Nicholson?
Phoebe: Hi hi...Oh you have got to sing.
Chandler: Joey, can I talk to you for a second? (He grabs him and starts to drag Joey into Monica's room.)
Rachel: (gasps) You found my book?!
Rachel: Oh, hey! Hi, there you are, I�ve been looking for you everywhere!
Rachel: Oh, no, no! I heard you before, that is so not what this is!
Monica: Would you please go?
Rachel: No Ross!! (stands up and moves away from him) Dont! You cant just kiss me and think youre gonna make it all go away, okay? It doesnt work that way. It doesnt just make it better. Okay?
Chandler: Ahh, you know what? That is....Who wouldnt want you?
Russell: You got married again.
Monica: Where you can make out with your assistant.
Rachel: Okay... Hey listen, just before you go I-I again, I just wanna say "thank you" for coming with me.
Ross: Oh, you have some studying to do?
MONICA: Well yeah, but, you know, uh, 27 is a dangerous eye age.
Rachel: Uh. (pause) Did you call your parents?
Benjamin: The selection committee has chosen the three of you as our finalists today. The ultimate decision will be based upon the answers you give to the questions I ask here. I'm gonna start with Dr. Li. Dr. Li, you claim the field is too reliant on the Linnaean taxonomic system. How do you propose to correct this problem?
MONICA: Two? TWO? How is that possible? I mean, have you seen you?
Ross: See? I told you something good would come along. And he seemed really nice. I've met him before?
Ross: (British) Come again? Whats-whats this nonsense? (Giggles.) (American.) All right, Im-Im not English. Im from Long Island. I was really nervous and the accent just uh, just came out. Im sorry. So, if we could just get back to the lecture. Umm, were there any questions? (Everyone raises their hands) About paleontology. (They all put their hands down.) All right, look I was just trying to make a good first impression. Obviously, I screwed up. But what you guys think of me is really important because Im-Im hoping to get a permanent job here. So if you just give me another chance to make a good impression
Phoebe: Well yes Rachel but you got something so beautiful out there
Ross: Rachel. Rachel Rachel. (Sits down beside her) I love you the most.
MONICA: Wait a minute, wait a minute. Yes he is. You are totally different.
Ross: I promise you she’s safe! No watch how much she loves this.
Ross: Alright, alright, maybe it'll take my mind off it. Do you promise to buy me a big thumb finger?
Phoebe: Oh, good, that's good, but you don't look like you were mugged!