words in movies
Phoebe: Youve got to get out of here! Save yourself!
Joey: No! I wont leave you!
Joey: No youre not! Not to me!
Joey: Yeah, youre great! Okay, lets take it from
Phoebe: Oh yeah, youre solid. Yeah, youre just no me.
Phoebe: (tremendously overacting) Fine! Ill do it without you! (Joey gives her thumbs up) I dont need you or anybody else! Im gonna make it on my own! (Joey closes the door to his bedroom.) Youll see!! Youll all see!!
Chandler: (To Joey) So uh, whats this thing youre auditioning for?
Rachel: HuhWait so Joey if you get this, youre gonna be like the star of your own TV show! I mean youll be like the Big Cheese! (To Phoebe) Or the Big MacHey! You love those!
Chandler: Now-now, why would you say that Joseph?
Joey: I mean come on you guys! My own TV show? I just dont know if Im good enough.
Rachel: Joey, what are you talking about? Youre a terrific actor.
Joey: You really think so?
Rachel: Ugh, how can you even ask that question?!
Joey: It's like, you got so many lines to learn so fast, that sometimes you need a minute to remember your next one. So while you're thinkin' of it, you take this big pause where you look all intense, you know, like this. (Does this intense look where it looks like he's smelling a fart.)
All you want is a dingle, What you envy's a schwang, A thing through which you can tinkle, Or play with, or simply let hang...
Joey: I play Al Pacino's butt. All right? He goes into the shower, and then- I'm his butt. Monica: (trying not to laugh) Oh my God. Joey: C'mon, you guys. This is a real movie, and Al Pacino's in it, and that's big! Chandler: Oh no, it's terrific, it's- it's- y'know, you deserve this, after all your years of struggling, you've finally been able to crack your way into show business. Joey: Okay, okay, fine! Make jokes, I don't care! This is a big break for me! Ross: You're right, you're right, it is.
Ross: So you gonna invite us all to the big opening?
Phoebe: (overacting with a song this time) (singing) Gooood luck! Gooood luck! We all wish you good luuuuuuuuck!!!
Ross: Wait a minute, are you doing that thing where you pretend it didnt go well but it really did go well?
Chandler: Oh-oh, what are you doing?
Ross: Look, dont worry. Okay? Youre gonna be fine.
Joey: Theres just so much pressure. I mean no offense, but what you guys do is very different. I dont know if youd understand.
Interviewer: So, uh, what are you going to do next?
Interviewer: You sure they haven't gone bad? You're sure they're not very, very bad?
Interviewer: You gonna slice them up real nice?
Rachel: (on the phone) Monica, Im quitting! I just helped an 81 year old woman put on a thong and she didnt even buy it! (Pause) Im telling you Im quitting! Thats it! Im talking to my boss right now! (Pause) Yes I am! (Pause) Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Okay bye, call me when you get this message. (Hangs up.)
Ross: You ate my sandwich?
Chandler: Oh come on guys, its not like I moved to Europe! I just moved across the hall! And we would have you over all the time if it werent for (struggles to get this out) Monicas allergies. (The duck quacks.) Youre right, I could never lie to you. She hates you. (The phone rings.) Should I get that? (Laughs, then answers the phone.) Hello? (Listens) Uh no, Joeys not here right now. Can I take a message? (Listens) Yeah, okay so the audition has been moved from 5:00 to 2:30? (Listens) Okay great. (Listens.) Bye. (Hangs up the phone and goes to write the message on the Magna-Doodle on the door but Monica walks in and forces him to jump out of the way.)
Monica: (startled) Ahh! Arent you dressed yet?
Chandler: Oh right, your allergies. (Monica leaves and to the chick and duck) All her, she hates you. (Chandler leaves without finishing the message for Joey.)
Joey: Yes!! Ha-ha!! All right! Hey! How cool would it be if you could watch like a real life-sized version of this? Huh? I mean how crazy would that be?
Joey: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) What are you talking about? The auditions not til 5:00! (Chandler suddenly remembers and looks at the unfinished message then tries to sneak over and finish it as Joey listens.) Well, nobody told me! (Listens) Whod you talk to? (Listens and turns around to see Chandler trying to finish the message.) Nevermind! (Hangs up.)
Chandler: You mean you didnt get it from this?
Joey: How could you do this to me Chandler?! This part couldve turned my whole career around!
Joey: Hey, you dont even live here anymore! What are you doing answering my phone? I have my machine!
Chandler: Which I bought for ya. Taught ya how to use it. You thought it was a copier. Look, if there was anything I could do, I would do it. Okay? But everybodys allowed one mistake, right?
Chandler: You know he coulda gotten me a VCR, he coulda gotten me a set of golf clubs, but no, he has to get me the woman repeller! The eyesore from the Liberace house of crap!
Chandler: Oh, yeah, easy for you to say, you don't have to walk around sporting some reject from the Mr. T collection. [Joey walks in behind Chandler]
Chandler: Yeah, I mean when you were late last night, Kathy and I got to talking, and one thing to another and
Joey: And what?! Did you sleep with her?!
Chandler: Youre right, I have no excuses! I was totally over the line.
Joey: Over the line?! You-youre-youre so far past the line, that you-you cant even see the line! The line is a dot to you!
Chandler: Look, Im not saying that you should magically forgive me! But youre not perfect! Youve made some errors in judgment too!
Chandler: What the hell happened?!! How were you locked in?!! And where the hell is all of our stuff?!!
Joey: I was tryin to make a sale!! Oh, man, if I ever run into that guy again, do you know what Im gonna do?
Chandler: Ok, now, remember, no trading. You get the pretty one, I get the mess.
Lorraine: Hi, Joey. (Sees Chandler.) Well well, look what you brought.
Chandler: ...And what did you bring?
Lorraine: She's checking the coats. Joey, I'm gonna go wash the cab smell off my hands. Will you get me a white Zinfandel, and a glass of red for Janice.
Joey: That's how they do pants! Ross, will you tell him? Isn't that how they measure pants?
Monica: Oh, stop beating yourself up! People make mistakes! These things happen! There arent any message youve forgotten to give me are there? (Chandler has a disgusted look on his face.) Apparently youre not very good at it! I
Chandler: Do you think hell ever forgive me?
Rachel: Of course he will! But Chandler the most important thing is you forgive yourself!
Rachel: Already? Thats pretty bad what you did.
Monica: Yknow what? He will forgive you. And I like to bring a pad with me when I go answer the phone just in case (Chandler gets that disgusted look back.) Okay
Chandler: You didnt see how mad he was, yknow?
Rachel: Im sure he will forgive you. Look, we have all been there! Yknow, you fight, you make up, its just the way it works.
Rachel: Yeah! You and that girl from that copy place, which yesterday you took full responsibility for!!
Rachel: (mocking him) You fell asleep?!
Ross: It was 5:30 in the morning, and you had rambled on for 18 pages. Front and back!! (they go into the living room, trapping Monica, Chandler, and Joey in the kitchen) (to Rachel) Oh-oh-oh, and by the way, Y-O-U-apostrophe-R-E means you are, Y-O-U-R means your!
Rachel: And hey! Just so you know, its not that common! It doesnt happen to every guy! And it is a big deal!!
Monica: You had no right to go out with him.
Monica: You sold me out.
Rachel: I did not sell you out.
Monica: Yes you did. You absolutely sold me...
Rachel: Would you let me talk. [flicks Monica on the forehead]
Monica: Did you just flick me?
Rachel: OK, well, you wouldn't let me finish and I was jus- [Monica flicks her back] Ow. That hurt [flicks Monica]
Phoebe: Alright, now I will let go if you both stop.
Phoebe: There we go.You know what, if we were in prison, you guys would be, like, my bitches.
Joey: Okay, buddy-boy. Here it is. You hide my clothes, I'm wearing everything you own.
Chandler: Joey? Got you a Joey Special, two pizzas! Joe? (The phone rings and he answers it) (On phone) Hello? (Takes the phone away from his mouth when he realizes what he just did and yells.) Damnit! (Back on phone.) Hello? (Listens.) No, Joeys not here right now, but I can take a message I think. (Listens) Hes still got a chance for the part?! Oh, thats great news! (Listens) Well no obviously not for the actor who was mauled by his dog. (Listens) Oh well, thats great. I will give Joey the message. Thank you! (Hangs up and goes to write the message on the Magna-Doodle.) Yes! (Reading what hes writing) Okay, Mac audition at 2:00. Allergy actor attacked. (Pause) By dog not flowers.
Chandler: Please tell me you got the message!
Chandler: The actor playing Mac couldnt do it, they needed to see you at 2 oclock.
Joey: Oh wow! Okay man, Im sorry. I did not mean to make you feel bad.
Chandler: Well thats good. Because you didnt! And Im incredibly happy for ya!!
Joey: (shocked) Thats mean! You really had me going there!
Joey: Yeah, youre right. Okay look, listen, lets talk about what a huge star Im gonna be!
Chandler: You are gonna be a huge star! Im gonna hug ya!
Joey: You hug me!
[What follows is the final set of flashbacks that feature a whole lot of lovin between Chandler and Joey. Theres no words, just hugs and even the kiss from The One With The Monkey. All of this is set to the song, Youve Really Got a Hold on Me!]
Joey: Come on C.H.E.E.S.E., Im not leaving without you! Try routing your backup source through your primary CPU.
Phoebe: (overacting badly) I cant! My circuits are fried! Theyre fried I tell you!!
Joey: Wow! (Back to reading the scene.) Well then Ill just have to carry you.
Ross: Thatll be a neat trick, when youre, (looks at the script) when youre dead!
Joey: Ross, you dont have to yell.
Phoebe: I thought you were excellent! In fact for a minute there I was like, "Ooh, whered Ross go?"
Ross: Thank you! And I have to say that first scene when you meet Mac
Monica: I know, after you left the store, I chose different ones.
Joey: Check the freezer. If theres none in there, then were probably out. Are you just getting in from work? Its late.
Monica: Okay, Joey's doing the ceremony and Chandler's giving you away.
Monica: Didn't you listen to the story? I mean, this is twisted! How could you get involved with a woman like this?
Janice: Oh, my Bing-a-ling. Ill wait for you. Do you even know how long youre going to be gone?
Monica: Do you think breaking up with him was a huge mistake?
Phoebe: Oh, it's like the mother ship is calling you home.
Mrs. Geller: (To Chandler) Youve done a wonderful job with this party Chandler. Everything looks so lovely.
Monica: Phoebe, you get the bear, uhm, Joey, you get the robot, and Chandler and I get the dog. Ok, and the race is going to go (Takes two cups and marks the start and finish lines with them) from here to here. Now the one who comes in last, stays!
Monica: You were my Midnight Mystery Kisser?
Joey: is because they were friends first. Y'know? So I asked myself, "Who are my friends?" You and Phoebe, and I saw you first. So
Joey: No, no, no. You actually did that when you were dancing to the Chicago-soundtrack. Look, Ross, about, about Rachel and I. Listen, you don't have to worry about that, okay? Because nothing is gonna happen.
Monica: Oh, please, stop! Look, we're supposed to be honest with each other. I-I just wish you could tell mejust say, "I don't like your massages."
Emily: How can you do this too me?! I thought I'd made my feelings about Rachel perfectly clear!
CHANDLER: Oh, seriously you want him?
JOEY: You wanna smell him?
Mrs. Geller: I brought something that I want to give you, assuming of course that you want it. (She holds up an engagement ring.)
JOEY: (to Chandler) What'd I tell you? What'd I tell you?
Rachel: I didnt know you could get married here.
Ross: You know, sometimes when I'm alone in my apartment, I look over here and you guys... are just having dinner or... watching TV or something, but... it makes me feel better. And now when I look over, who am I gonna see? The Gottliebs, the Yangs? They don't make me feel so good. (Joey pats Ross on his back)
MONICA: So'd you guys have fun?
Monica: Hey Tim? I need a calamari and a Caesar salad. And umm, could you get me the pesto?
Phoebe: Hey you guys! Look what I just got. (she shows them a pair of slippers)
Pete: I guess you can.
MRS GREEN: This is just so exciting. You know, I never worked. I went straight from my father's house to the sorority house to my husband's house. I am just so proud of you.
Phoebe: Oh, okay, I don't know what you just said, so let's get started.
Phoebe: Oh, yeah. Ok, thank you.
Phoebe: (to Rachel) Thank you so much for this.
Rachel: Now Joey remember, if you win you have to hug me! You hug me!
Rachel: Joey I dont think you know what behalf means.
Chandler: Okay, so now do you believe that she's attracted to me?
Joey: (interrupting her) Hey! Don't worry about it! It was fine! I ended up having the best time with Rachel! I just felt bad for you, stuck in that room, working on Ross's speech... (pulls a face)
Rachel: Well, if it makes you feel any better, I made a fool out of myself.
RACHEL: Wow, he must like you the best.
Janice: I don't know what to say... I mean, you know, obviously we have this... heat between us.
CHANDLER: You done?
CHANDLER: You know it?
Joey: Hey Ross. This probably isn't the best time to bring it up, but you have to throw a party for Monica.
Monica: Wait a minute, they're making you take time off work?
Phoebe: Where did you go to do it?
Chandler: Oh you got a wedding dress? Thats great!
RACHEL: Do you?
Emily: I dont care! You just get him!
PHOEBE: Thank you.
Luisa: Luisa Gianetti! Lincoln High? I sat behind you guys in home room!
PHOEBE: Yeah. Here you go.
RACHEL: You still think of it as your apartment, don't you?
Hillary: After a while its like, shut your mouth, you know?
Susan: No, you don't.
Monica: (sitting down) Gary's gonna ask you to move in with him!!
Chandler: You know, I can't believe you. Linda is so great! Why won't you go out with her again?
MONICA: That was you?
Phoebe: Uh, only if you have the hiccups too. Yeah, the pictures are for you, the water and the chocolate is for me. I just didnt feel like getting up. Okay, Im gonna show you a picture of Ross. Okay? And youre going to remember all of the bad things about him. All right? Really focus on his flaws.
Rachel: You mean the one that youre wearing? (Adjusts Monicas pink bra strap as Monica looks down her shirt.)
Phoebe: Okay, I hear you! Are you capable of talking about any thing else?
Ross: I I dont know what you are talking about.
Rachel: Well, in my defense, you were not supposed to tell each other.
Hombre Man: (To Joey) You were saying?
Rachel: Yeah, y'know what? I'm-I'm gonna meet you upstairs in a minute.
PHOE: No, you are not, you are very attractive. You know what, I go through the exact same thing. Every time I put on a little weight, I start questioning everyting.
RACHEL: Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. See Phoebe, Phoebe.
TOGETHER: Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat, what are they feeding you? Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat, it's not your fault.
Monica: Oh, is that why you did it the secret hallway where nobody ever goes?!
Joey: I dont know why you say that so soon.
Rachel: I know. Okay. (Whispering and thinking.) Okay. Okay. All right. All right, this is what were gonna do, we are gonna go to the next highest bidder, and we are just gonna let them buy it, and then youre just gonna pay the difference.
Rachel: How-how did you lose your job here?
Mrs. Geller: (to Ross on the stairs) I have a wonderful idea. You should take Rachel to the prom.
Chandler: Well you dont have to sound so surprised.
Ross: No, I cant. I would, I really would, but my son is here; I cant leave him. Isntyou dont think theres any way?
Ross: Oh my God. Oh my God! And youre-youre youre not freaking out?
STEVE: How are you? Look, you guys wanna meet the group? Come on. So, are you one of the ones who fooled around with my dad?
Monica: All right, I know youre hurting, and-and I want to be supportive, but dont say that again.
Phoebe: Oh, happy my wedding day to you!
Joey: (Spotting her movements takes her hand into his own) You are beautiful, you know that?
Rachel: (shocked) You let Joey drive it?!
Monica: You keep saying that.
Joey: Oh my God! How many of these things did you have? These are pure vodka.
CHANDLER: Alright, I'll tell you what, you call the couch and then, and then we'll call the couch, and we'll see who it comes to.
Rachel: Please. If she said to you, "Ross, I want you on this couch, right here, right now," what would you say?
Rachel: Boy, are you gonna be sorry if that�s true.
Monica: Sure! If you're just gonna hang out as friends, then maybe I'll join ya. You know, I'm your friend (to Phoebe) and Mike's friend (Mike is sceptical).
The Casting Director: Okay, uh well, let's try one. Whenever you guys are ready. (Some dude puts down a couple bowls of soup in front of them.)
Phoebe: Oh, it's so hard to get rid of stuff! Did you and Chandler have to make compromises when you first moved in together?
RACH: Yes! Thank you.
Ross: Thanks! (walks out of the room and starts hugging the wall) Thank you! (closes the door)
Rachel: Go-go-go-go, come on! (Ross goes over to the counte) (to Chandler) So uh, what did you find out?
Dr. Baldhara: Well, it's technically not a zoo per se, it's more of an interactive wildlife experience. Let me ask you some questions about, is it, uh, Marcel?
Phoebe: Hey Mon umm, if you do get married, can I bring two guests?
Carol: Why'd you freak out?
Ross: It was you, pal.
Boy in the Cape: My friend Lewis told me you were giving out money.
Chandler: We were wondering what was taking so long with the gift, but now we understand you were doing this.
Rachel: Hey! We were not on aOkay. Thats fine! Fine. Yknow what Ben? One day when you are a lot older I am going to tell you that entire story over a pitcher of real margaritas, okay?
Monica: Okay. Im guessing that if you dont want to deliver, you probably dont want to pick stuff up either.
Chandler: (On cell phone) Don't worry, I'll be back before you know it. Yes it will be the same. Because I know, that's how. I promise.
Chandler: Yeah, I can say that I have a conference and you can say you have a chef thing.
Rachel: (to Ross) Yes! Did you see that?
Phoebe: (on phone, in 'Katelynn's' voice) 'Hi, I have Phoebe Buffay returning a page. Okay, well, um, she's in her car I'll have to patch you through.'
Roger: I dunno. Maybe you wanted your marriage to fail.
Mike: Uhm, did you guys know that there is a giant ice sculpture in the hall?