words in movies
Ross: Hey you guys I got some bad news. (He sets the stack of papers down on the table.)
Phoebe: Well thats no way to sell newspapers. Why dont you try, "Extra! Extra! Read all about it!"
Monica: You dont think that umm, (reading) "The chefs Mahi Mahi was awful awful," is bad press?
Joey: Yeah! Yeah Monica! You listen to me, okay? And Im not just saying this because Im your friend, Im sayin it cause its the truth. Youre food is abysmal!
Ross: What are you doing up?
Ross: Its funny you should mention diapers.
Ross: Okay look, theres nothing to worry about. We have plenty of time. Theres a great baby furniture store on west 10th. Tomorrow, we will go there and we will get you everything that you need. Okay?
Rachel: Okay. Thank you. Thats great. Thank you. Wait-wait! Where on west 10th? Because theres this really cute shoe store that has like this little
Ross: (interrupting her) Okay. Okay. If uh, if youre gonna do this, then Im gonna do that. (Points to the bathroom.) So (Starts for the bathroom.)
Rachel: Im just kidding! You can go pee! (He does so in a hurry.)
Joey: Okay, Ill see you there. (Starts to leave)
Monica: Joey! (He returns) Now that youre here
Joey: Sure, I can hang out til I have to meet ya. (To Chandler) What uhHow come youre not going?
Joey: I thought you already have a job.
Chandler: And people say you dont pay attention. No, this is a much better job. Its vice-president of a company that does data reconfiguration and statistical factoring for other companies.
Joey: Wow! How do you know how to do that?!
Joey: You cooked him?
Chandler: The front page? You really do live in your own little world, dont ya?
Cashier: Do you uh, want these things delivered Mr. and Mrs. Geller?
Cashier: Why dont you fill out this address card. (Hands him one.)
Cashier: I notice you picked out a lot of our dinosaur items.
Cashier: Oh no-no, Im fascinated by paleontology. Have you read the new Walter Alvarez book?
Cashier: I can tell you work out. (Ross is please and Rachel looks at him confused.) A paleontologist who works out, youre like Indiana Jones. (Rachel has a disbelieving look on her face.)
Phoebe: Well did she know you two werent married?
Rachel: You dont understand! You didnt see how brazen she was.
Phoebe: Sounds like youre a little jealous.
Rachel: Oh yeah! You reallyYou look great.
Phoebe: Yknow! You dont make a very good first impression.
Phoebe: Oh you dont know.
Chandler: Are you serious?!
Phoebe: Yes, when I first met you, you were like, "Blah, blah, blah." I was like, shhh!
Phoebe: Well its just like youre trying too hard. Always making jokes, yknow, you justYou come off a little needy.
Chandler: (To Rachel) Did you like me when we first met?
Rachel: Chandler, Im not gonna lie to ya, but I am gonna run away from you. (Gets up and hurries out.)
Monica: I think the things that you said about me are really unfair, and I would like for you to give my bouillabaisse another chance.
Monica: Spoon? (Hands him one and he tastes it.) So, what do you think?
The Cooking Teacher: Monica, you go to the head of the class.
Rachel: All this stuff takes up a lot of room. Hey how uh, how serious are you about keeping Ben in your life?
Ross: My son? Pretty serious. (Theres a knock on the door and Ross answers it.) Oh hey Katie! (The cashier from before) What uh, what are you doing here?
Katie: Well, the delivery went out to you and I realized they forgot this. (A blanket.)
Katie: Oh uh I actually came here to ask you out.
Ross: Oh! Wow! Uh, yeah! That sounds great. Im just gonna put this (The money) back in my pocket, pretend that didnt happen. Uh yeah, actually Im free now. Do you wanna grab some coffee or
Rachel: Horny bitch. (They both look at her, pretending that the dinosaurs shes holding are arguing.) No! Youre a horny bitch! Noooo! Youre the horny bitch! No! Youre a horny bitch!
Rachel: So you guys go, have a really good time.
Rachel: So, you had a good day huh? Big commission; picked up a daddy.
Katie: Are you okay with this?
Rachel: Oh yeah! Yeah please, you guys have fun.
Katie: Okay. It was nice to see you.
Rachel: Oh and it was great to see you too. And you look fantastic, although you missed a button.
Rachel: Oh okay, I see what youre doing there.
Phoebe: Oh! Its okay, you calm down after a while and then people can see how really sweet and wonderful you really are.
Phoebe: All right, dont freak out! Okay? I-I will help you. How long before you have to leave?
Phoebe: I cant help you.
Phoebe: All right, all right, well just do our best. Okay? So lets say Im the interviewer and Im meeting you for the first time. Okay. "Hi! Come on in, Im uh, Regina Philange."
Chandler: Well you should meet my uncle, Bada. (Pause) Ill let myself out.
The Cooking Teacher: Your Fettuccini Alfredo looks a little dry, did you use all your cheese?
Joey: When you say used, do you mean eat as a pre-cooking snack?
The Cooking Teacher: (To Monica) Oh! Something smells good over at Monicas station! (She tries Monicas fettuccini.) Oh my God! This is absolutely amazing! Youve never made this before?
Monica: I-I-Im sorry, your-your mouth was full, I didnt hear what you said. Umm, hats off to who now?
Chandler: I think youll find if I come to work here, I dont micro-manage. I dont shy away from delegating.
Phoebe: Um-hmm, thats good to know. But lets stop focusing on what you dont do, and start focusing on what you do do.
Phoebe: You gotta go!
Phoebe: Okay, dont worry. Youre ready.
Phoebe: Absolutely! Just fight all your natural instincts and youll be great.
Monica: Yknow, you called me that before so I-I took the liberty of fashioning a star out of aluminum foil. Now, no pressure, you like my cookies, you give me the star. (Hands it to her.)
Monica: Wow! A star! (The class glares at her.) I know you all hate me and-and Im sorry, but I dont care.
The Cooking Teacher: Okay Joey, youre up next. (Tries one of his cookies.) This are good! This is amazing! You get an A!
Monica: Joey! Im so proud of you!
The Cooking Teacher: I think you should give him your star.
The Cooking Teacher: If youre a professional chef, what are you doing taking Introduction to Cooking?
Monica: You do?
The Cooking Teacher: Oh yes! Youre an excellent chef! As a person youre a little
The Cooking Teacher: Well actually, did either of you pay for this class?
The Interviewer: You mustve had your hands full.
The Interviewer: Now youll be heading a whole division, so youll have a lot of duties.
The Interviewer: But therell be perhaps 30 people under you so you can dump a certain amount on them.
Chandler: No dont I beg of you!
The Interviewer: All right then, well have a definite answer for you on Monday, but I think I can say with some confidence, youll fit in well here.
The Interviewer: Absolutely. (They walk to the door.) You can relax; you did great.
Chandler: Yeah I gotta say thank you, I was really nervous. Yknow Ive been told I come on to strong, make to many jokes, and then it was really hard to sidestep that duty thing. (The interviewer doesnt understand) Duties. (Still doesnt.) Duties! (Still doesnt.) Poo. (Still doesnt.)
Rachel: Hi! Youre back from your date!
Ross: How are you?
Ross: Whats uh, whats going on? Do you not, do you not like Katie?
Rachel: Of course you did Ross, you would date a gorilla if it called you Indiana Jones!
Ross: Did you get like a fresh batch of pregnancy hormones today?!
Rachel: I dont want you to date her!
Ross: (laughs) Why? What, what are you jealous?
Rachel: Yes! And not because I want you to go out with me, but because I dont want you to go out with anybody! Okay? I know its a terrible thing to even think this, and its completely inappropriate, but I want you to be at my constant beck and call 24 hours a day! Im very sorry, but that is just the way that I feel.
Ross: I wont date. Ill uh, Ill be here, with you, all the time.
Ross: True, but youre allowed to be unreasonable. Youre having our baby.
Rachel: (starting to cry) Oh Ross, thank you. Thank you. (They hug.)
Ross: Do you feel better?
Rachel: No, not really. Youre pressing the baby into my bladder and now I have to pee. Sorry. (She gets up and starts for the bathroom.)
Ross: We live together. Youre having our baby. Im not gonna see anybody else. Are you-are you sure you dont want something more?
Ross: Oh-oh, Rach! I was just messin around! (Shes stunned) Like you did last night when I had to pee?
Rachel: (laughs) I knew that! I knew that! I was just messin with you too!
Ross: (pause) Okay. Okay. Because for a minute you said you
Ross: that you actually
Monica: Honey I cant even imagine how hard this must be for you. But, I dont want you to lose Joey over it. And right now he just needs to know that youre still his friend.
Monica: I love you. (They kiss.) Hey listen umm, when, when you were talkin about our future you said cat, but you meant dog right.
JOEY: No no, uh, don't thank me for comin' in. Uh, at least let me finish. Uh, we could take the expressway but uh, this time of day you're better off taking the budge. You were goin' for the word bridge there weren't ya. I'll have a good day. [gets up and leaves]
Phoebe: Yeah, Chandler why don't you take a walk? This doesn't concern you.
Rachel: What the hell is that?!! (to Monica) What the hell is that? Is that you? (Monica nods her head no, and Rachel realizes what is making that sound.) Ohhhhhhh! (storms over to Chandler and Joeys with Monica in trail.)
Phoebe: Okay. Umm, before we get started, I just wanna say for the record that I love Ross, I think hes such a great guy. Here. (Hands her the picture, Rachel grabs it out of her hand.) Okay, now, close your eyes. And imagine that youre with Ross okay and imagine that youre kissing him. And youre-youre running your hands all over his body. And then you run your hands through his hair, but eew-oh gross its some kind of grease, itsuck! Hah?
Phoebe: Hello, tiny embryos. Well, Im-Im Phoebe Buffay, hi! Im-Im-Im hoping to be your uterus for the next nine months. You should know, that were doing this for Frank and Alice, who you know, youve been there! Umm, yknow they want you so much, so when you guys get in there, really grab on. Okay, and-and I promise that Ill keep you safe and warm until youre ready to have them take you home, so Oh! And also, umm next time you see me, Im screaming, dont worry, thats whats supposed to happen.
Kathy: Okay, so let me just get this straight. Youre accusing me of cheating on you, and insulting my performance?
Ross: I'll do it. Hey, whatever you need me to do, I'm your man. (He starts to sit down on the bed. There's one problem though, he's about two feet to the left of it. Needless to say, he misses and falls on his butt.) (Looking up at Joey.) Whoa-oh-whoa! Are you, are you okay?
Phoebe: Yeah! And until then you are going to sing to me because the radios broken and you are selfish but have a nice voice.
Phoebe: Well, no, no, wait, wait, wait. All right, I gotta go. Just listen. Promise me, that you will wait a minute before you call her.
Chandler: Not as much fun as last time. Apparently you only get porn if you're giving a sperm sample.
Phoebe: I know but he call's and my heart goes to him. You know that bastard is one smooth talking free lance kite designer.
Joey: Well, you might wanna make a little extra, y'know youll probably be hungry after the sex.
Rachel: Its okay. Sometimes, things dont work out the way youd thought they would.
Whitfield: What do you mean, your seat?
Monica: Alright, well, maybe I should let you and the second prettiest girl in Oklahoma get back to work.
Joey: Well whats fun about that? You expect me to be the host of a boring game thats just people standing around answering questions?
Ross: Yeah, well, m-maybe youre right.
Joey: Hey Ross, listen, you know that right now, your baby's only this big? (measures about 2 inches with his thumb and index finger) This is your baby. (in baby-like voice) Hi Daddy!
Monica: This is so typical. Y'know, we give, and we give, and we give. And then- we just get nothing back! And then one day, y'know, it's just, you wake up, and "See you around!" Let's go, Phoebe.
Ginger: You have three nipples?
Chandler: I did! But the store wouldnt take her back! So then I took her to the shelter, and you know what I found out?
Monica: (Start annoying hyper-competitive mode now.) (Jumping up) What don't you just calm down Phoebe! All right?! Why dont you just get all your facts before you run around telling everybody that you're the only hot couple!!
Monica: Uh, look, Larry honey, umm, I wrote the book on Section 5 and I know that you don't have to wear your hat unless you're in the kitchen.
Chandler: Oh, we wanted to finish the crossword before we went to bed. Hey, do you know a six-letter word for red?
Rachel: Okay. (listens) Okay, daddy well see you tomorrow night. (listens) Okay bye-bye. (hangs up)
Chandler: Yes, you got something from the Screen Actors Guild.
Hypnosis Tape: Cigarettes dont control you. You are a strong, confident woman, who does not need to smoke.
Ross: So listen ah, I picked Monica for secret Santa, but Im already getting her something for Chanukah, I was wondering if you wanna switch.
Fat Monica: Hey Chandler! Did you like the macaroni and cheese?
Chandler: Oh! Some guy. Some guy. 'Hey Jill, I saw you with some guy last night. Yes, he was some guy.
Dr. Long: You must be a little uncomfortable.
Joanna: No-ho-ho! (pause) Yeah. (pause) I mean, no-no-no-no-no, dont you worry, Im sure with your qualifications you wont need to sleep with some guy to get that job. Although, I might need some convincing.
Phoebe: Well, it's a problem for me, which means it's a problem for you 'cause I'm a cop. (Shows the badge.)
RYAN: What're you doing? Are you scratching?
Chandler: (entering) Oh good, okay, I can't take it anymore. I can't take it anymore. So you win, okay? Here! (Hands him the 50 bucks he's about to owe him.) Pheebs? Flying a jet? Better make it a spaceship so that you can get back to your home planet! And Ross, phone call for you today, Tom Jones, he wants his pants back! And Hornswoggle? What are you dating a character from Fraggile Rock?! (He sits down and sighs in relief.)
Joey: What? That's the kinda thing you usually run by me.
Rachel: No no no no no. You wanted me to take them down, so... (she climbs onto the railing to reach the top of a pole) ..Im takin em down. Okay? Whoa! (Screams.)
Janice: Ooh, that decides it then. I was on the fence. But knowing that you two would be our neighbors? Ah! now we have to get it! (Chandler and Monica are utterly shocked) Ellen, we're going to talk numbers. (Grabs Ellen by her elbow and pulls her outside)
Monica: No I totally disagree. No I think it's fine for a guy to do something like that. Such you an actor. Not that you need to,your eyebrows are...
Monica: Yes! Have you seen it?
Ross: Hey, do you guys think that if all those things happened, wed still hang out?
Monica: Thats right! Maybe its time you took a good hard look at a mirror young lady old lady lady!
Monica, Chandler, Ross: Congratulations!/Good for you!/Great!
David: Okay, what the hell, what the hell. (Sweeps the remaining papers off the desk and grabs Phoebe) You want me to actually throw you or you-you wanna just hop?
MONICA: Well, I just think the baby would keep falling off the dog. Do you, uh, do you , do you not see kids in our future.
Gavin: Thank god you finally said that, I saw you make a note on your pad three hours ago. (Rachel throws away that paper) Man, I really bug you, don't I?
Phoebe: Okay! Oh my God! My first bike! Thank you for the best present Ive ever gotten.
Phoebe: Okay. Wait, do you know how youre going to stall her?
Phoebe: Oh, well, dont tell me you want to keep more of your stuff in my uterus.
Ross: Yes, it was the trophy you got if you won the game. But our Dad said, nobody won that game, and he was sick of our fighting, so he took the trophy and.... (pauses to collect himself, as he is on the verge of tears saying this) threw it in the lake.
Rachel: And you know, we said that we would, we would live together as long as this makes sense. An maybe this, you know,Just doesn�t make sense anymore.
Joey: Oh, I do. (Gives her the Joey-love look.) How you doin?
Rachel: Hi. Ohhh, you got my message.
PHOEBE: There we go.You know what, if we were in prison, you guys would be, like, my bitches.
Phoebe: Oh my God, youve got to stop chattering!
Ross: You are not putting that on again! Marcel, OKif you press that button, you are in very, very big trouble.
Rachel: Ross, that was a Halloween costume, unless you would like me to go to this thing as Little Bo Peep.
Ross: Hmph. So what you, you tell each other everything?
Dr. Green: Wait a minute, you dont have renters insurance?!
Rachel: Well is it fair that all you did was put on a cape and I gotta give you free stuff?
Lorraine: She's checking the coats. Joey, I'm gonna go wash the cab smell off my hands. Will you get me a white Zinfandel, and a glass of red for Janice.
Chandler: Remember that really cold morning, you woke up and those dogs were licking your face?
Ross: Okay. Thanks you guys. Pheebs are you wearing fur?
Ross: Im agreeing with you. Did you, listen, did you happen to tell Phoebe yet?
Ross: Phoebe, she doesnt know that you sneak out every night, she doesnt know that you sneak back every morning, and she doesnt know that youve been living with your Grandmothers for a week now.
Morse: (walking up) That was a great lecture today. Did you get a little hair cut?
Monica: That’s right. You’re making a commitment and that’s the same, whether you do that at the Plaza or, where are you gonna do it?
Joey (to Rachel): Dude, chill! (to Ross) Okay, we also kissed in Barbados, but we didn't plan it, okay? And the only reason that that happened was because I saw you kissing Charlie.
Steve: Oh look, you don't have to give it too me right now! You can slip it under my door. (Points to his apartment across the hall.)
Rachel: Yeah. I'm-I'm telling you he's really sweet and he's really funny and he's just ugh, got a good heart. And besides, I y'know, I think he really likes you.
Phoebe: Because you would rather live here with Joey.
Chandler: Oh its always nicer to here than, "Aw crap! You again!"
Julie: Have you felt Rachels cervix Ross?
Monica: Okay, if you need the vacuum, its in my closet on the left-hand side. Ah, the garbage bags are next to the refrigerator
Phoebe: Oh my god. (Chandler downs another espresso.) How many of those have you had?
CHANDLER: If you guys feel this big, maybe that's not our fault. Maybe that's just how you feel.
Chandler: No, no, youre right, it is a ridiculous name!
Rachel: We're waiting for you to open the door. You got the keys.
Rachel: Thank you. (She sets it on the floor and is about to stomp on it with her shoe when the rest of the gang jumps up and yells simultaneously.) What? (They all yell again.) You dont want to see this do you?
The Doctor: Did you bring the toe?
PHOEBE: And he's going to be paying this woman? Why doesn't he just give her like a throne, and a crown, and like a, you know, gold stick with a ball on top.
Phoebe: (Looking relieved. She puts down the phone.) Oh thank god. Oh, you changed your mind. Oh, look I know you probably want to be alone, and you dont want to talk about it, thats fine. I just want you to know, I think you are doing the right thing and...
Monica: Sweetie, you know I have no sense of humor when it comes to the wedding.
Joey: You know, you and Bob, and me and my girlfriend, uh, uh, Monica.
Chandler: Well, does that mean that youre not going to wearing yours?
Gunther: Sorry. She thought you were somebody else.
Joey: Hey Pheebs! Listen, uh can you do me a favor? I forgot the pin number to my ATM card can, can you get it for me?
Ross: What? (to Joey) So what are you going to do? I mean how, how are you going to tell Chandler?
Phoebe: You mean a backup?
Phoebe: Okay, she would love that! Y'know, 'cause you know all the clean places to eat.
Monica: So have you called her yet?
Phoebe: I know no, no, y'know you dont deserve this, you dont Ross. Youre, youre really, youre so good. (kisses him on the cheek)
Joey: Yeah! Yeah! I mean Im sorry, I wish I can take everybody, but yknow Chandler always supported my career. Hes paid for acting classes and head shots and stuff and well this will be my way of paying you back.
The Singing Man: Ill see you tomorrow morning!
Monica: (pointing at Rachel) De-caff. (to All) Okay, everybody, this is Rachel, another Lincoln High survivor. (to Rachel) This is everybody, this is Chandler, and Phoebe, and Joey, and- you remember my brother Ross?
Charlie: Oh, Ross, you gave a B to a Pottery Barn catalogue.
Phoebe: (smells at him) Chandler, you stink of cigarettes.
Rachel: Yes you are! Oh, I am so proud of you!