words in movies
Ross: Why do you care so much?
Monica: Yes Rachel, why do you care so much?
Rachel: (worried) Be-cause Ross is the father of my child! You know... and I... want him to hook up with lots of women! (pause) I just... All I'm saying is... I don't think that Joey and Charlie have anything in common.
Phoebe: Wow, Joey and a professor! Can you imagine if they had kids and if the kids got her intelligence and Joey's raw sexual magnetism... Oh, those nerds will get laaaaaid!
Charlie: Oh, you know what? I'll come with you!
Charlie: (talking to Ross) I feel like I owe you an explanation. I don't ordinarily go around kissing guys at parties. I'm... well, I'm kind of embarrassed. I really hope you don't think less of me.
Ross: Uhm no! Think less of you! No, I don't think less of you. I mean, you saw someone you liked and you kissed them. I mean, those people who like someone and don't kiss them... those-those people are stupid, I hate those people.
Charlie: You know, actually I'm a little surprised to myself. I mean, Joey is so different from the guys I usually date. I mean, they're all professors, and intellectuals, and paleontologists mostly, you know, very cerebral...
Joey: Hey, if you wanna grab a bite before work we'd better get acrimonious. No? Am I getting close?
Phoebe: Hey you guys! Look what I just got. (she shows them a pair of slippers)
Rachel: Oh, OH! Wow, I love those! Where did you get them?
Monica: Oh, you can't show Phoebe this! She hates those corporate massage chains.
Monica: Do you wanna go hunting?
Phoebe: No, you can't go there! You know how I feel about these "big massage places"! They're putting people like me out of business!
Phoebe: Well, do you care about friendship?
Phoebe: I feel really strongly about this, Rachel. Please, don't use this gift certificate. I'm asking you as a friend.
Phoebe: Thank you. (she tears up the gift certificate)
Monica: (entering) Hey honey! I missed you today!
Monica: Ok, trying to turn me on by making a mess? Know your audience! Besides, tomorrow we're doing those fertility tests and until then you need to keep your tadpoles in the tank.
Chandler: (embarrassed) I cannot believe Ross told you that! (pause) And in my defense, it was a Wendy's!
Joey: Can I offer you a drink?
Joey: Hey, if you need a tour guide... (point to himself)
Charlie: Oh, you mean it? That would be so fun!
Joey: Yeah, definitely, definitely. Ok, what do you wanna see first?
Joey: Ok, let me stop you right there. The Mets suck, ok? You wanna see the Yankees.
Receptionist: (in an affected tone) Hello, welcome to Lavender Day Spa SPA. How may I help you?
Receptionist: Ok well, I'll call you as soon as your massage therapist is ready.
Receptionist: Then why you work here?
Joey: I need to talk to you about Charlie.
Ross: (annoyed) Oh, do you, do you really?
Ross: Look, if you don't know what the word "acrimonious" means, just don't use it!
Joey: No, look, you know Charlie, right? She's cool, she's funny, her body is soo...
Ross: (looking down) Are you wearing two belts?
Joey: (checking) EH, what do you know!
Ross: You were saying you didn't want to seem stupid.
Joey: Right, right, right, well, she wants to go to all this cultural places and I don't know how to talk about that stuff. You gotta help me out!
Ross: You know, I really don't want to get involved in you guy's relationship.
Ross: Ok. Let's see. Oh, you should take her to the MET!
Joey: (realizing) Oh, that's what she meant! (pause) You know, if they're gonna shorten it, they should call it the MUSE! You know, short for museum, and avoid all the confusion!
Ross: Yeah, uh, uh, ok, there's this great rare bookstore on Madison Avenue. You know what? She loves architecture, you know what you should do? You should take a walk down fifth to the Saint Patrick's Cathedral and there there's this great little pastry shop that she'd love.
Joey: Geez, sounds like you should be going on this date!
Ross: But I'm not! (pause). You know what if you're in the mood for Thai food...
Joey: Whoa, whoa, whoa! Slow down, you go way too fast. Ok? Just go back to the MET, ok?
Joey: You got to tell me exactly what to do there.
Ross: Ok, when you walk in the museum, take the right, that's the antiquities wing. Ancient Egypt, Mesopotamia, up to the Byzantine Empire.
Nurse: Mr. Bing? (Chandler jumps up) Here you are! You'll go into that room and deposit your specimen into the container.
Chandler: Deposit my specimen? You know, usually I have to call a 900 number for that kind of talk. Thanks, got it.
Monica: Hey, honey, my test is down the hall, are you sure you're going to be ok?
Monica: I know this is embarrassing, but nobody cares! No one here even knows you!
Chandler: Why are you here?
Janice: Oh! Someone's a little cranky today cuz they have to do it in a cup! (laughs) Oh! They gave you the kiddy size (looking at the cup in his hand).
Janice: Please... go! (Then shouts after him) Just let me know if you need a hand!
Rachel: You know I... (lifts her head and tries to look in Phoebe's direction)
Ross: Now, do you have any idea what you just said?
Ross: Ok now, remember, when you get to the museum, Monet is not spelt M-O-N-A-Y. I just... I wrote that out phonetically for you.
Ross: Yeah, yeah that means... you know? We just... we don't have time for this.
Ross: Ok, but you know what? I gotta say, I'm really impressed that you were able to memorize all this so quickly!
Ross: Nah ah! Nah ah! (stops him form doing so) No no no! No ad-libbing and dude, you can't touch the paintings.
Joey: Come on! you... (reaches out to touch the imaginary painting again)
Janice: Oh! Sid is still in his room. I don't allow porn at home so this is like a vacation for him. So did you do it? Did you make your deposit?
Janice: That's not the hard part honey! The hard part is what comes next, I mean aren't you worried about the results?
Janice: Oh! Well, you know what? It probably is.
Janice: Oh, Chandler, look. You and Monica are meant to have children. I am sure it's gonna be just fine.
Janice: What, you can do it in the parking lot of a Taco Bell, but you can't do it at a doctor's office?
Phoebe: (Singing) "Ipan Stripan, Glupi Glabi! " And that is the Swedish National Anthem! Thank you for asking! (looks annoyed)
Rachel: Wow, Ikea... what a rich culture. Uhm, you know what? I have a friend who is a masseuse.
Phoebe: Uhu, uhu... and why do you think that is?
Phoebe: You know it's me?
Rachel: For like a half an hour! Man, you can lie about Sweden!
Phoebe: How can you come here?
Rachel: How could you not tell me you worked here?
Phoebe: I don't have to tell you everything!
Rachel: Yes you do, if you're going to make me feel guilty for getting a free massage!
Rachel: Oh! Phoebe, why did you lie to me about working here?
Phoebe: Because I was ashamed ok? I sold out for the cash! And then they give me benefits like medical, and dental, and a 401K. But you know... you pay a price. Now I'm this Corporate stooge and punching a clock and Ugh! paying taxes!
Rachel: Phoebe, honey, if you hate it so much, you should walk out there right now and quit! Be true to what you believe in! Honey, you have principles and I so admire that! I don't have any!
Phoebe: You know what? You are right. I am gonna quit. It's time I took my life back!
Rachel: Good for you Pheebs!
Phoebe: Okay (walks out and closes the door behind her, looks up and whispers) If you guys have microphones in there too, I didn't mean any of that. I love you.
Ross: What do you mean?
Ross: (perplexed for a moment) Wait a minute... when you guys walked into the Met, did you go to the right?
Ross: (shaking head) Oh Joey, Joey! But still, I mean, it seems like you guys are having a great time together.
Charlie: Actually, you know, Joey is your friend, and you don't really know me that well; it would be weird.
Charlie: Well... I'm just thinking that maybe he's not the right guy to be with right now, maybe I should be with someone... I have more in common with. You know what I mean?
Ross: (slowly) Yeah. But you know what? I think you should give Joey a chance. I mean, he's a great guy, and sure he doesn't know that much about art but you know, you can always talk about that with someone else.
Ross: And if you think about it, I mean the reason he memorized all that stuff is because he thought it was important to you. You know, that's the kind of guy Joey is.
Joey: (aside, to Ross) Hey Ross! That art stuff worked, you hooked me up.
Joey: Although some of that stuff wasn't where you said it was gonna be, but... (confidently) I made it work.
Chandler: Hello? Oh hi, Doctor Connelly. (pause) No, she's not here but, you know, I can tell her. Should I be sitting down for this? (his smile fades as he hears the answer) Oh. (pause) Well, so what does that mean? (pause) Ok. Ok, thank you. Thanks. (hangs up)
Monica: With good news? (very quickly and wringing hands) Of course it is not good news, you just said (deadpan) "Doctor Connelly just called". If it was good news you would have said (excitedly) "Doctor Connelly just called! " But so what is it? Is there a problem, uh? Is there a problem with me or with you?
Chandler: Apparently my sperm have low motility and you have an inhospitable environment.
Chandler: It means that my guys won't get off their barcaloungers and you have a uterus that is prepared to kill the ones that do. (pause) It means...
Phoebe: (through the door, with a Scottish accent) Are you ready for your Scottish massage? Put your face in the hole, lassy.
Monica: Relax! It's Phoebe! Not you!
Phoebe: Yknow Rach, I think that, I think you should be Monicas made of honor.
Rachel: (entering) You guys, youre never gonna believe what I just found tacked up on a telephone pole! (Shes holding a flyer.) Look kinda familiar?
Mike: Look, if Phoebe wants to marry David, she should, I'm not gonna stand in the way of that and neither should you.
Joey: Im telling you man, I saw it.
David: In fact, ehm... I going to kiss you now. (David holds Phoebe and wants to kiss her.)
CHANDLER: Hey Phoebs, can I have the milk after you?
Phoebe: What do you mean?
Ross: I want you to tell her everything. About the deal you tried to make with me, about the crazy questions you... Wally Cox! That's the voice of Underdog!
Rachel: Why aren't you at work?
Monica: Okay, I have to get that. Now when I get back, I want you and your friends to be gone. Thanksgiving is over. The Vein has spoken.
Rachel: So you know how to fix it?
Richard: You really sure?
Joey: How you got three women to marry you, Ill never know.
Joey: (sits down next to Ross) First of all, Utah? Dude, you can't just make stuff up!
Joey: Duh, where've you been?
Monica: (to Joey) You owe me 20 bucks.
Monica: Honey! Do you know that none of that stuff came from me?! I mean I never said I wanted to have babies and get married right now!
Gunther: You dont need to fill these silences.
Monica: So Chandler, I guess I'll see you at dinner.
Chandler: Oh, I'm glad you guys are past that little awkward phase.
Joey: Then why would you say that?!
Chandler: You want me to wash my hands first, don't you?
The Saleswoman: Did you cut this couch in half?
Rachel: Yes, I know! And Joey knows! But Ross doesn't know so you have to stop screaming!!
Janice: I just came by to give you a kiss, I have to go pick up the baby, so. I'll see you later sweetheart, you too Chandler. (laughs)
Ross: Not that big a deal? It's amazing. Ok, you just reach in there, there's one little maneuver, and bam, a bra right out the sleeve. All right, as far as I'm concerned, there is nothing a guy can do that even comes close. Am I right?
Dina: Thanks so much for meetin with me. Joeys told me so much about you!
Rachel: Joey, honey, I dont think youre supposed to go back there.
Phoebe: Oh my God! I do love you! How did you do it?!
Doctor: Ill be right with you. Okay? (to the nurse) Thanks, Wendy.
Phoebe: Ohh, theyre having a great time with their Aunt Phoebe! Aunt Rachel hasnt been helpful at all. So, do you miss me?
Ross: Unless (Rachel groans.) You anticipated that I would figure all this out and you know that it actually is a girl, and you really do want her to be named Ruth! Well, Im not falling for that! Okay? Ruth is off the table!
Ross: Hey Pheebs, you gonna have the rest of that Pop-Tart?.. Pheebs?
CAROLINE: I think it's great you guys are doing this.
Rachel: Please tell me youre not gonna dress up like a dinosaur.
Phoebe: Did you, did you touch any of the guitars while you were there? Did you?!
Chandler: It's ok, it's ok. You know what? (Takes out his mobile) I'll just call the agency and tell them to throw out the letter. (starts dialing)
Richard: Well, you seem fine.
Monica: Oh no! You werent supposed to see this!
Susan: So, so, did you hear?
Joey: Well, yeah, it was a really nice thing and all, but it made you feel really good right?
Phoebe: What?! I thought you were crazy about her!
All: WE WON!! Thank you! Yes!
Rachel: Let me uh, let me ask you something, do wedding vows mean squat to you people?! And why is it that the second we tell you were going out of town, bamn there you are in bed with the neighbors dog walker?!
Joeys Sister: Finally, I thought wed never be alone. Can I just tell you something, I have not stopped thinking about you since the party. (kisses him)
Chandler: You know, our band is playing on Friday.
Phoebe: Are you moving out?
Trudie Styler: You must be Bens mum.
RICHARD: What're you doing?
Phoebe Sr: The three losers. Oh, poor Lily. (Phoebe notices a picture on the fridge, takes it, and puts it in her pocket.) Ohh, y'know I-I heard about what happened, that must have been just terrible for you, losing your mother that way.
Phoebe: David! (He kisses her cheek) What-what are you doing here? Arent you supposed to be in Russia?
Rachel: Every day, you are becoming more and more like your mother.
Phoebe: I want you to be Crazy Bitch again.
Ross: Okay. (sees two people sitting in their seats.) Uh, huh. Excuse me, Im sorry, I-I think you may be in our seats.
Phoebe: So-so how long did that last for you and Chandler?
Ross: Hey, yknow whats weird? After you guys get married, when you introduce me to people youre gonna have to say, "This is my brother-in-law Ross." Not, "My friend Ross," "brother-in-law Ross." Thats weird isnt it?
Ross: Hey, whered you get that?
Chandler: All right, all right, Ill go sleep with my girlfriend. But Im just doing it for you guys.
Rachel: Yeah, you bet.
Chandler: You mean a three pointer?
Monica: You can spill. In the sink.
Monica: Well, what did you do?
Rachel: Not working with me, Joe! Here's the thing: lately I have been having thoughts (pauses) musings, if you will!
Ross: Okay, look, I-I know what you guys are going to say
Joey: Hey, what have you guys been up too?
Chandler: Well, you do want all that stuff, right?
Monica: What are you doing with the lamp?
Rachel: Joey, if you wanna look good, why don't you just come down to the store? I'll help you out.
RACH: Maybe it was just the kind of story where you have to be there.
Rachel: Oh, Sophie, I guess you didnt hear about Joanna
Phoebe: Umm, well I, I kinda had a little chat with Alice, and I sort of made her see why you two shouldnt be together, y'know. And youre gonna see it to, one day, you really, really will.
MONICA: Chandler could you at least send some women to my party? [buzzer goes off] Alright that's Ross.
SUSIE: If you didn't have your shirt tucked into them.
Ross: (yelling, thinking Emily can hear him through the answering machine all the way to New York.) I love you too! Im, Im gonna call you right now from the phone booth! (Realises) You cant hear me. (Goes to make his call.)
Aunt Iris: No! That's bluffing. Lesson number one. (walks into kitchen) Let me tell you something... everything you hear at a poker game is pure crap. (to Phoebe): Nice earrings.
Phoebe: You think you know me so well.
Monica: Okay, well I do know you.
Rachel: I still dont get how you know when its false labour.
Rachel: I cannot believe that you didnt tell me that we are still married!!
Phoebe: Monica, Monica, you know what gets out hummus.
Phoebe: Okay, so when youre done with your tea Ill look at your leaves and tell you your fortune.
Joey: (reacting first by jumping up) Dude! What the hell are you doing?! God! (Heads for his room leaving Ross.)
RACHEL: I know, so do I. Oh Phoebe, I'm so glad you made me do this. OK, lemme se yours.
Monica: Well you did a little bit.
Monica: (To Chandler) This is what happens when you dont register for gifts!
Ross: Oh, come on, you know its a girl!
Joey: Monica, you have to do some damage control here, okay. 'Cause he's feeling like... (the door opens and Chandler walks in with a pizza)
Joey: Hey! Well I hope it goes better than the last time you did it for that girl downstairs, remember? (Phoebe glares at him.)
Chandler: (to Mon) She's right, you shouldn't have bought tickets just for us ...
Monica: Oh. (Holds on to it.) (To herself) Youre not gettin it.
Julio: Whoa, whoa, whoa, the poem is not about you.
Joey: (flipping to the last page) Ew, you get thrown from a horse into an electric fence.
MONICA: I can't believe that this whole time we thought he hated us. I mean, isn't it amazing how much you can touch someone's life, without even knowing it?...Would you look at this dump? He hated us. This is his final revenge!
RACHEL: Ok, ok, so you're not a fan, but I mean, come on, you cannot do this to her.
Teacher: Alrighty. Were gonna start with some basic third stage breathing exercises, so Mummies, why dont you get on your back? And... coaches, you should be supporting Mummys head.
Monica: Oh, gosh, you got some on your shirt.
Phoebe: I can't ask him! Do you have any idea how inappropriate that would be?! All I'm saying is just talk to Frank. Okay? Just, y'know, feel him out!
CHANDLER: Hey Eddie, you uh, wanna play some foosball?
Monica: Rachel, you and Mark?!