words in movies
Ross: Why do you care so much?
Monica: Yes Rachel, why do you care so much?
Rachel: (worried) Be-cause Ross is the father of my child! You know... and I... want him to hook up with lots of women! (pause) I just... All I'm saying is... I don't think that Joey and Charlie have anything in common.
Phoebe: Wow, Joey and a professor! Can you imagine if they had kids and if the kids got her intelligence and Joey's raw sexual magnetism... Oh, those nerds will get laaaaaid!
Charlie: Oh, you know what? I'll come with you!
Charlie: (talking to Ross) I feel like I owe you an explanation. I don't ordinarily go around kissing guys at parties. I'm... well, I'm kind of embarrassed. I really hope you don't think less of me.
Ross: Uhm no! Think less of you! No, I don't think less of you. I mean, you saw someone you liked and you kissed them. I mean, those people who like someone and don't kiss them... those-those people are stupid, I hate those people.
Charlie: You know, actually I'm a little surprised to myself. I mean, Joey is so different from the guys I usually date. I mean, they're all professors, and intellectuals, and paleontologists mostly, you know, very cerebral...
Joey: Hey, if you wanna grab a bite before work we'd better get acrimonious. No? Am I getting close?
Phoebe: Hey you guys! Look what I just got. (she shows them a pair of slippers)
Rachel: Oh, OH! Wow, I love those! Where did you get them?
Monica: Oh, you can't show Phoebe this! She hates those corporate massage chains.
Monica: Do you wanna go hunting?
Phoebe: No, you can't go there! You know how I feel about these "big massage places"! They're putting people like me out of business!
Phoebe: Well, do you care about friendship?
Phoebe: I feel really strongly about this, Rachel. Please, don't use this gift certificate. I'm asking you as a friend.
Phoebe: Thank you. (she tears up the gift certificate)
Monica: (entering) Hey honey! I missed you today!
Monica: Ok, trying to turn me on by making a mess? Know your audience! Besides, tomorrow we're doing those fertility tests and until then you need to keep your tadpoles in the tank.
Chandler: (embarrassed) I cannot believe Ross told you that! (pause) And in my defense, it was a Wendy's!
Joey: Can I offer you a drink?
Joey: Hey, if you need a tour guide... (point to himself)
Charlie: Oh, you mean it? That would be so fun!
Joey: Yeah, definitely, definitely. Ok, what do you wanna see first?
Joey: Ok, let me stop you right there. The Mets suck, ok? You wanna see the Yankees.
Receptionist: (in an affected tone) Hello, welcome to Lavender Day Spa SPA. How may I help you?
Receptionist: Ok well, I'll call you as soon as your massage therapist is ready.
Receptionist: Then why you work here?
Joey: I need to talk to you about Charlie.
Ross: (annoyed) Oh, do you, do you really?
Ross: Look, if you don't know what the word "acrimonious" means, just don't use it!
Joey: No, look, you know Charlie, right? She's cool, she's funny, her body is soo...
Ross: (looking down) Are you wearing two belts?
Joey: (checking) EH, what do you know!
Ross: You were saying you didn't want to seem stupid.
Joey: Right, right, right, well, she wants to go to all this cultural places and I don't know how to talk about that stuff. You gotta help me out!
Ross: You know, I really don't want to get involved in you guy's relationship.
Ross: Ok. Let's see. Oh, you should take her to the MET!
Joey: (realizing) Oh, that's what she meant! (pause) You know, if they're gonna shorten it, they should call it the MUSE! You know, short for museum, and avoid all the confusion!
Ross: Yeah, uh, uh, ok, there's this great rare bookstore on Madison Avenue. You know what? She loves architecture, you know what you should do? You should take a walk down fifth to the Saint Patrick's Cathedral and there there's this great little pastry shop that she'd love.
Joey: Geez, sounds like you should be going on this date!
Ross: But I'm not! (pause). You know what if you're in the mood for Thai food...
Joey: Whoa, whoa, whoa! Slow down, you go way too fast. Ok? Just go back to the MET, ok?
Joey: You got to tell me exactly what to do there.
Ross: Ok, when you walk in the museum, take the right, that's the antiquities wing. Ancient Egypt, Mesopotamia, up to the Byzantine Empire.
Nurse: Mr. Bing? (Chandler jumps up) Here you are! You'll go into that room and deposit your specimen into the container.
Chandler: Deposit my specimen? You know, usually I have to call a 900 number for that kind of talk. Thanks, got it.
Monica: Hey, honey, my test is down the hall, are you sure you're going to be ok?
Monica: I know this is embarrassing, but nobody cares! No one here even knows you!
Chandler: Why are you here?
Janice: Oh! Someone's a little cranky today cuz they have to do it in a cup! (laughs) Oh! They gave you the kiddy size (looking at the cup in his hand).
Janice: Please... go! (Then shouts after him) Just let me know if you need a hand!
Rachel: You know I... (lifts her head and tries to look in Phoebe's direction)
Ross: Now, do you have any idea what you just said?
Ross: Ok now, remember, when you get to the museum, Monet is not spelt M-O-N-A-Y. I just... I wrote that out phonetically for you.
Ross: Yeah, yeah that means... you know? We just... we don't have time for this.
Ross: Ok, but you know what? I gotta say, I'm really impressed that you were able to memorize all this so quickly!
Ross: Nah ah! Nah ah! (stops him form doing so) No no no! No ad-libbing and dude, you can't touch the paintings.
Joey: Come on! you... (reaches out to touch the imaginary painting again)
Janice: Oh! Sid is still in his room. I don't allow porn at home so this is like a vacation for him. So did you do it? Did you make your deposit?
Janice: That's not the hard part honey! The hard part is what comes next, I mean aren't you worried about the results?
Janice: Oh! Well, you know what? It probably is.
Janice: Oh, Chandler, look. You and Monica are meant to have children. I am sure it's gonna be just fine.
Janice: What, you can do it in the parking lot of a Taco Bell, but you can't do it at a doctor's office?
Phoebe: (Singing) "Ipan Stripan, Glupi Glabi! " And that is the Swedish National Anthem! Thank you for asking! (looks annoyed)
Rachel: Wow, Ikea... what a rich culture. Uhm, you know what? I have a friend who is a masseuse.
Phoebe: Uhu, uhu... and why do you think that is?
Phoebe: You know it's me?
Rachel: For like a half an hour! Man, you can lie about Sweden!
Phoebe: How can you come here?
Rachel: How could you not tell me you worked here?
Phoebe: I don't have to tell you everything!
Rachel: Yes you do, if you're going to make me feel guilty for getting a free massage!
Rachel: Oh! Phoebe, why did you lie to me about working here?
Phoebe: Because I was ashamed ok? I sold out for the cash! And then they give me benefits like medical, and dental, and a 401K. But you know... you pay a price. Now I'm this Corporate stooge and punching a clock and Ugh! paying taxes!
Rachel: Phoebe, honey, if you hate it so much, you should walk out there right now and quit! Be true to what you believe in! Honey, you have principles and I so admire that! I don't have any!
Phoebe: You know what? You are right. I am gonna quit. It's time I took my life back!
Rachel: Good for you Pheebs!
Phoebe: Okay (walks out and closes the door behind her, looks up and whispers) If you guys have microphones in there too, I didn't mean any of that. I love you.
Ross: What do you mean?
Ross: (perplexed for a moment) Wait a minute... when you guys walked into the Met, did you go to the right?
Ross: (shaking head) Oh Joey, Joey! But still, I mean, it seems like you guys are having a great time together.
Charlie: Actually, you know, Joey is your friend, and you don't really know me that well; it would be weird.
Charlie: Well... I'm just thinking that maybe he's not the right guy to be with right now, maybe I should be with someone... I have more in common with. You know what I mean?
Ross: (slowly) Yeah. But you know what? I think you should give Joey a chance. I mean, he's a great guy, and sure he doesn't know that much about art but you know, you can always talk about that with someone else.
Ross: And if you think about it, I mean the reason he memorized all that stuff is because he thought it was important to you. You know, that's the kind of guy Joey is.
Joey: (aside, to Ross) Hey Ross! That art stuff worked, you hooked me up.
Joey: Although some of that stuff wasn't where you said it was gonna be, but... (confidently) I made it work.
Chandler: Hello? Oh hi, Doctor Connelly. (pause) No, she's not here but, you know, I can tell her. Should I be sitting down for this? (his smile fades as he hears the answer) Oh. (pause) Well, so what does that mean? (pause) Ok. Ok, thank you. Thanks. (hangs up)
Monica: With good news? (very quickly and wringing hands) Of course it is not good news, you just said (deadpan) "Doctor Connelly just called". If it was good news you would have said (excitedly) "Doctor Connelly just called! " But so what is it? Is there a problem, uh? Is there a problem with me or with you?
Chandler: Apparently my sperm have low motility and you have an inhospitable environment.
Chandler: It means that my guys won't get off their barcaloungers and you have a uterus that is prepared to kill the ones that do. (pause) It means...
Phoebe: (through the door, with a Scottish accent) Are you ready for your Scottish massage? Put your face in the hole, lassy.
Kathy: I'm sorry, you're right, I apologize, but I should tell you that I'm waiting for a date. (Joey enters) Oh, and there he is now.
Rachel: What are you gonna do Pheebs?
Monica: Oh, you know, my flock is good, I mean, yeah, my flock pretty much takes care of themselves at this point. Good flock. Flock, flock, flock.
Monica: I wont care, because I know you will be feeling it all in here. (Points to her heart.)
Rachel: This is Bonnie? (to Phoebe) This is Bonnie? (to Bonnie) Youre Bonnie?
Ross: Umm, say youre gonna be starving after all this moving. What do you say I take you to dinner tonight?
Ross: Thank you. (Joey mouths to Ross, "Youll show me right?") No!
Phoebe: Wait a second, or maybe you can go in first.
Ross: How are you ever going to sell this place?
Monica: Why don't you just take it with you?
Monica: Would you stop? Weve only been going out a couple of weeks, I mean we dont even know if hes gonna propose.
Chandler: Y'know, if you're gonna work late, I could look in on him for you.
Ross: Do you mind if I sit here for a sec.?
Ursula: Right... Oh, I got something for you, too.
Monica: Joey, what are you doing? You promised Phoebe you wouldnt eat meat until she has the babies!
Rachel: Thank you. (Dr. Long exits.) Well, I guess we have some time to kill.
Joey: How can you say that?! The Mets have no closer!
Monica: You know, on the way over here, I saw this drunk guy throw up. And then a pigeon ate it!
Mrs. Green: Thats true. You do have another child.
Tag: Im telling you, you never gave them to me.
Monica: I warned you...
Monica: How do you know she's gonna start talking?
Gary: Phoebe, you don't have to say that.
Sebastian: Here you go. (Hands her, her cup.)
Ross: Yes, you can, very much.
Chandler: You're kidding! Did you tell her I wasn't?
Monica: Its okay honey, youll find a name.
Joey: I'm fine, I'm fine, it's just, it's just weird what's happening with her and Ross. You know, yesterday he asked me to fix him up with somebody.
Joey: No-no-no! No-no wait Rach, you know what would even be more fun? Telling them.
Phoebe: (shocked) Youve never asked a guy out?!!
Monica: Wow! Wow! And its definitely all gone? Theres nothing there to work with? (Joey glares at her.) What were you thinking?
Monica: Well, why would she lie to you?
RACH: I didn't know then. And how come you never said anything to me.
Rachel: Honey, you got a little thing on your...(points to her whole face)
Ross: Will you-will you please?
Ross: Tag? Y-You're going? (Comes over to Tag) Uh we didn't, uh we didn't get the chance to talk. Uh, so, where did you say you're from again?
Rachel: Phoebe, I mean, you do know hes married?
Ross: Oh my god, you know what, yeah, I think you�re right. I think � listen, listen!
Chandler: Yeah, sure. What do you need? We got lace, satin, sateen, raffia, gingham, felt, (Pause) and I think my testacles may be in here too.
Joey: (to Chandler) If you don't do it, I will.
PHOEBE: Alright, now I will let go if you both stop.
Ross: Hey there little fella! Hey, uh-hey, why dont we get some shoes on ya, huh? Hey, why dont you show dad how you can put your shoes on, in your room! Yay!!
Ross: You can totally, totally live on this.
Rachel: Thank you! And now if youll excuse me, I have to go to the rest room.
Joey: If you wanna get back in the car, we need the wire, your call.
Ross: Hey! I just got uh, my teacher evaluations! Check out what this one student wrote, "I loved Dr. Gellers class. Mind blowing lectures! Dr. Geller, you are definitely the hottie of the paleontology department!"
Dr. Baldhara: You're making a big mistake here. I mean, San Diego's all well and good, but if you give him to me, I'll start him off against a blind rabbit and give you twenty percent of the gains.
Chandler: Could be. I mean technically she did strip, we just, we just missed it. (Walks towards the bedroom.) Maam, are you also a stripper?
Joey: Hey listen, why dont you come downstairs with me? Theres some really nice girls down there.
Monica: Why do you want to see my hand?
Joey: If you ask me to stay, I�ll pee. (leaves)
Monica: You invite my brother, you invite my whole family, and not me?! Why?! WhatWhy wouldnt you want me at your wedding? What could I have possibly done?! (Frannies husband walks up.) Stuart!
EDDIE: Ok, you really want me out?
Phoebe: Well did she know you two werent married?
Joey: Well off the top of my head uhh, maybe shes having her cake and eating it too. You being the cake and Richard being the too. Or!
Phoebe: Yeah! Youre such a great friend!
Phoebe: (looking through the pizzas) Okay pepperoni, pepperoni, pepperoni, okay Ross, I know she's pretty and you love her, but is she stupid?! She forgot my vegetarian!
Ross: Dad seriously! Yknow you really should see someone about that!
Ross: (chuckles nervously) The sex? (chuckles) Um, I'm having enough trouble with the image of you and Susan together, when you throw in Tanya (miming washing hair, that's the best I could think of), yaw...
Joey: Hey, yknow what you guys? I think Im gonna go walk her home. (Gets up and runs out.)
Monica: Its wrong. You know what else is wrong? Phoebe picking Rachel.
Rachel: Oh, c'mon. She's a person, you can do it!
Chandler: Yeah, I think that's wrong, but there's a Connect the Dots in here for you later. (To Monica) Hey, how about maroon?
Ross: And confused. Rach, sweetie, I-I um I didnt propose to you.
Chandler: So you knew we were gonna miss the movie!
Ross: Um, in Phoebe's room. You can't go in there.
Joey: (still singing) " Amy! Happy birthday to you!"
Rachel: You are never going to believe what happened to me today.
Joey: (entering) Hey. (Ross turns to see who it is, and seeing its Joey he just ignores him and turns back around.) Ross, I know youre pissed at me, but we have to talk about this.
Dr. Green: No, when you put your feet up in my bed, you tugged on my catheter.
Joey: Of course it's true! How else would you explain all the weird stuff that's been going on?
Monica: I swear you said you had the keys.
Chandler: Hi Emma! It's the year 2020. Are you still enjoying your nap?
Monica: Hey, what did you guys do today?
Phoebe: Do you wanna get to Rachel in time?
Rick: (looking at her feet) Wow, you have really pretty feet.
Ross: Listen, Joey, I know what he did was wrong but dont you think you could at least hear the guy out?
Barry: (to Mindy) I swear, whatever I was doing, I was always thinking of you.
Rachel: Yeah, I know. It's ridiculous! I can't see you either.
Ross: You were my first kiss with Rachel?
Paul: Well maybe you can date him then that would save me the trouble of killing him. (Rachel laughs then starts looking at him.) Are you okay?
Joey: Hey, Mon! Im not doing anything, why dont you fire me?
Quartet: Your no God's gift to women, that's all in your headdddd. You are just a buttmunch.
Eric: No-no its not! I dont want to lose you! Its-its like I was saying to Ursula when I was making love to her and I thought she was youYeah it is too weird.
Monica: I cant believe this. Do you think that your parents could help pay for it?
Gene: You put this on a sandwich.
Chandler: (to Monica) You see you cant tell which one is which either, dwha!!
Chandler: (entering) Okay. You were right. I'm in love with Joey's girlfriend.
Mrs. Green: Youre gonna be a great father.
Joey: No way! Look, Halloween is so stupid! Dressing up, pretending to be someone youre not
RACHEL: Ahh, so do you, beautiful. [they hug]
Phoebe: You can't put your cigarette out on a tree!
Monica: (looking very serious) I need to talk to you.
Phoebe: Hey you guys, I dont mean to make things worse, but umm, I dont want to live with Rachel anymore.
Ross: Look, you can't do this Mon. All right, if you do this, I'm, I'm gonna, I'm, I'm gonna.....
MR. GREENE: ...and you sand it and you varnish it...
Casting Director No. 1: That's fine, thank you.
Chandler: I cannot believe you didnt pick me.
Phoebe: Oh my God Chandler, the one you picked is gone. Its over!
Chandler: See uh, thats-thats actually what I wanted to talk to you about. I-I think I know who the other guy is.