words in movies
Chandler: Pheebs, can you help me pick out an engagement ring for Monica? I cant figure this out! Its so hard! Should I get her a (turning to each page) Tiffany cut or a Princess cut or aah-ah! Paper cut!
Phoebe: Now, have you told anyone else?
Phoebe: You told me.
Chandler: Well, its because I trust you, youre one of my best friends, and you walked in on me when I was looking at ring brochures.
Phoebe: Yeah well, once again not knocking pays off. I only wish you hadnt been on the toilet.
Ross: Oh perfect, we were just gonna see if you wanted to go.
Joey: Oh, Im sorry. You wanna bite? (Holds his piece out for him.)
Phoebe: Thats easy! You just have to think of him as a-as a jar of pickles that wont open.
Rachel: So what are you saying; I should run him under hot water and bang his head against a table?
Phoebe: No thats what you do when you want to get the truth out of someone.
Paul: (To Rachel) How are you?
Phoebe: So how are things going with you?
Ross: Great to see you!
Paul: Good to see you too!
Ross: How you doing?
Ross: Okay! You take care!
Ross: Hey Pheebs, what-what was the deal with you and Chandler blowing us off before?
Ross: Phoebe, whyd you do it?
Phoebe: I didnt do it! It was Chandler! Hes Hes mad at you!
Phoebe: Please, I think you know why.
Phoebe: Come on Ross, youre a paleontologist, dig a little deeper.
Phoebe: Do you think thats something that hed be mad at you for?
Phoebe: Oh, if thats what you want you then you really should run his head under hot water and bang his head against a table.
Rachel: Okay. Hey, what are you thinking? What are you thinking right now?
Paul: Im thinking that you are looking really fine it that dress.
Paul: Are you talking about having sex?
Rachel: No Paul, I dont know anything about you! Yknow, like-like your childhood! Tell me about your childhood!
Rachel: Okay, well then how about puberty! Come on, thats always a painful time! Yknow your friends invite you to a slumber party and then they stick your hand in warm water while youre sleeping so that you pee in your sleeping bag.
Rachel: Well, youre lucky you never met that bitch Sharon Majesky. Anyway, umm The rest of you life, yknow? Any regrets?
Paul: I wanted a big wheel. And instead my parents got me this little plastic chicken that you hop around on. It was embarrassing; kids made fun of me. That was a pretty tough year.
Rachel: Thats-thats great! See? I already feel like I know you a little better! Thank you. Okay, come on. Now we can go eat. Lets go. (Gets up to leave, but Paul doesnt move.)
Paul: And in fifth grade I got into a fight. Well, it wasnt really a fight. Richard Darinvel bit me on the nose and, and I feel down. I still have a little scare right here (points to it) you can see it.
Rachel: Yeah. Yeah, I-I-I see the scare. Listen, Paul, I think this is really great that-that yknow, you shared your feelings. Its really, its beautiful, but umm, what do you say we go share some food?
Rachel: What?! Wait! What are you talking about?! You love their Kung Pao Chicken!
Phoebe: Okay, so maybe you dont get her a ring. Maybe you-maybe you do something different. Yknow? Maybe you get her an engagement bracelet, yknow? Or an engagement tiara? Orooh! An engagement Revolutionary War musket! (Picks one up from the display in the corner.
Chandler: Yknow, Im so glad I picked you to help me with this.
Phoebe: Huh? Can you just imagine getting down on one knee and handing her this gorgeous piece of weaponry?
Phoebe: (coming over after returning the musket) Wait a minute, no, this is, this is the reason you brought me. Okay? I know how to haggle. So let me handle this from here on out.
Male Jeweler: Can I help you?
Chandler: Sir, can I ask you to umm, could you hold out that ring and ask me to marry you?
Male Jeweler: Okay. (Holds out the ring, deadpan.) Will you marry me?
Phoebe: We will give you $10.
Male Jeweler: (angrily) Are you interested in this ring?!
Male Jeweler: (ignoring her) How would you like to pay?
Chandler: Uh, credit card. (Reaches for it then realizes) Oh no! No-no, but I left my credit card with Joey. (To Phoebe) Okay, Ill go get it. You guard the ring.
Phoebe: Okay. (To the jeweler) Listen, Im sorry about before. Do you have anything her for $10.
Phoebe: Ill give you $1 for them.
Gunther: (handing them the bill) Here you go.
Joey: Hey-hey-hey-ho-ho, I got this one. Here you go. (Hands Gunther Chandlers card.) Yknow I gotta tell ya, sometimes I justI dont get Chandler. Yknow, me and him do stuff all the time without you and you dont get all upset.
Rachel: Oh thats right. Youre the talker. (They both reflect on that briefly) Anyway uh, great idea! Umm, I gotta go to the store; I told him that I would buy him some more tissues.
Rachel: No you dont!
Phoebe: Okay umm, Id also like to try on the tiara. (The male jeweler hands it to her.) Oh yeah. Okay. (Puts it on.) (To the jeweler) What do you think, too much?
Paul: (acting manly to try and cover up his crying) Okay. Chandler, did your dad ever hug you?
Chandler: No, did he hug you?!
Chandler: Well, you can see my dad in Vegas kissing other dads.
Paul: Would you .Would you hug me?
Chandler: Okay, a quick one. Come on hug it out. (Paul rushes over and hugs Chandler tightly.) Oh hey! There you go. (The hug continues.) Okay. (The hug continues.)
Chandler: Do you have my credit card?
Joey: Come on! Itll be fun! Me, you, and Ross, and Paul probably
Phoebe: Oh my God Chandler, the one you picked is gone. Its over!
Chandler: They put you in jail?
Chandler: Phoebe, I asked you to guard the ring!
Ross: I cant believe it. (Pause) Can I tell you something? Im a little mad at him now.
Joey: Can I tell you something? Me too.
Rachel: I dont care about the little dude! I cant! I cannot listen to anymore of this! Yknow, the only person who would want to listen to this is a mental health professional! And then its only because they get paid $100 an hour! Do you know how much money I couldve made listening to you? $2,000! And do you know when I figured that out? While you were talking!
Paul: What?! I cant believe youre trying to stifle me! When just 14 hours ago we figured out that that is exactly what my mother was trying to do to me!
Rachel: Oh Im sorry. I I-I dont meanI didnt mean to stifle you. I This is all just a little overwhelming.
Paul: Oh Rachel, Im so sorry. I didnt mean to overwhelm you. Its just that, when those gates open, you (Starts to breakdown.) Hard to close em. But they are closed now. Believe me.
Rachel: Im so glad, Im so glad you shared. (Feeling his shoulder.) And Im glad that youre done. What do you say we umm (Nods in the direction of the bedroom.)
Chandler: I cant believe I let you talk me into buying this stupid gumball machine looking ring!
Phoebe: Well you certainly cant give her that stupid gumball ring.
Phoebe: Wow! Youre good! After this, we should solve crimes.
Phoebe: Oh, okay. (Walks over to him.) Excuse me sir? Could you come with me please? You have a phone call.
Customer: Do you know who at my office?
Chandler: (to him) Hi! Hi. Okay, there was a slight mix-up at the jewelry store, the ring youre about to propose with was supposed to be held for me. So, Im gonna need to have that back. (The guy isnt sure.) But, in exchange Im willing to trade you this beautiful, more expensive ring. (Looking at the ring.) Ew.
Customer: It is beautiful, but Im gonna use this one. Now, if youll excuse me.
Chandler: No-no! This is my fiancee (Phoebe) and her heart was set on that ring. You dont want to break her heart now do you?
Phoebe: Yeah, do you want to break a dying womans heart?
Customer: Youre dying?!
Chandler: Thank you. Thank you. Thank you! (To his girlfriend) And you are about to marry a wonderful man! (She stunned and hes horrified.) Hey! Im marrying a dead woman!
Ross: So you two are really serious?!
Chandler: Okay! (They hug.) I was gonna wait til uh, it was official yknow? But I got so excited I just had to tell you guys because youre my best friends.
Rachel: (who has just entered) Ugh! No more crying! Please! I just dumped one cry baby, Ill dump you too!
Rachel: Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh Chandler!! (Hugs him.) You guys are gonna be so happy!
Ross: You told her before you told us?
Chandler: Well, she walked in when I was looking at the ring brochures. You can understand that, right? (Ross and Joey look at each other and go back to watching the game on TV.) Guys? Guys? (Walks in front of them again.)
Phoebe: Of course not, because youre in love with her.
Monica: Are you a virgin?
Phoebe: Oh before I forget, are you coming to Mike's piano bar tonight?
GUY: What're you doing?
Rachel: Well, it was just something Josh said about v-necks, but you had to be there.
Chandler: You dont have to stop having fun just because Im here. Kathy didnt cheat on all of you. (To Joey) Well, except you. (They hug and Chandler goes into the bathroom with the chick and duck following him.)
Rachel: Ross, things aren't gonna be weird between us, right? I mean was that just the stupidest thing, me telling you that?
Phoebe: Well, why are you doing this anyway?
Monica: Hey, come on Phoebe, you can understand why this would be weird for me.
Joey: Because its all tainted with your betrayal. From now on this apartment is empty for me! And Im not happy about you either. (The bread maker dings) Oh, and just so you know, I made that bread for you. (Joey walks into his bedroom and slams the door.)
Rachel: (with a hurt expression on her face) Okay, but before you go, could you help me first?
RACH: Oh, no, Michael, it's not you. I'm sorry, it's just, it's this thing. It's probably not as bad as it sounds but this friend of mine is, is getting a cat with his girlfriend.
Chandler: No, you don't have to, and you can't because I, I live here too.
ERICA: Sabrina. I know about you two. I saw you today kissing in the doctor's lounge.
MONICA: Oh my god, little Stevie Fisher? How've you been?
Ross: So when do you think youre gonna talk to her?
Larry: Oh, will you mind if I wash up? Because I came straight from work and who knows where these babies (Holds up his hands) have been.
RACHEL: What do you mean?
Monica: Youre getting a crush on your sisters fianc�e.
Joey: So youve been sittin around here all mornin?
PRODUCER: OK Phoebe, you ready to try one?
MONICA: You don't have the guts.
ROSS: Good, 'cause I love you.
Monica: And that's great for you guys, but we want a lawn and a swingset...
Monica: What do you have against the beautiful guest room?
RACHEL: Well I love you too.
Phoebe: OK fine! Please come and support Mike. You don't have to sing.
Rachel: That's great, great. So do you have any questions for us?
Ross: Youve sentenced him?!
Joey: Yeah! Yeah yknow, like warm up the crowd. Ask em where theyre from. Cause in Joey Tribbiani you get a minister and you get an entertainer. Im a minis-tainer! (Rapping) There is no one better! There is no one greater!
Joey: Come on baby, dont go. Please? What do you say?
Chandler: Oh. Oh right! Right! Because youre still seeing him and uh, hes a good guy. I mean, I remember a time when (He fakes falling asleep.)
Chandler: You know, on second thought, gum would be perfection. (Jill gives him a stick of gum, and a strange look) 'Gum would be perfection'? 'Gum would be perfection.' Could have said 'gum would be nice,' or 'I'll have a stick,' but no, no, no, no. For me, gum is perfection. I loathe myself.
ROSS: Well, I'm gonna kiss you.
RACHEL: Well you better.
Joey: Well uh, I don't know about who's here, but I can tell you for damn sure who's not here and that's Rachel!!
MONICA: Wow, all you need now is The Killing Fields and some guacamole and you've got yourself a part-ay.
Monica: (to Chandler) Oh, honey, can you make sure we get a King size bed!
INTERVIEWER: You gonna slice them up real nice?
Alan: Yeah, I'm sorry too. But, I gotta tell you, I am a little relieved.
MONICA: Did you like it?
Joey: You know, I could like maybe... I could do a dramatic reading of one of her books!
Janine: Thank you. (They kiss.)
Chandler: Okay, I'm gonna go to the bathroom. Will you watch my phone?
RACHEL: Would you guys stop.
Phoebe: Im just saying, get his number just in case. But no Chandler is in an accident and cant perform sexually and he would want you to take a lover to satisfy the needs that he can no longer fulfill.
Emily: Yeah, but it-it-its my whole lifeyou come to England.
Carol: Sorry. You look good too.
Kate: What? So you never went out with an actress before?
Joey: (entering) Hey! You guys! Remember that audition I had a while ago and didnt get the part?
Ross: No, you started it.
Joey: Unless you wanna practice the Foxtrot again? Or-or the Tango?
Monica: Well, at least you scared someone.
Joey: Why do you have to break up with her? Be a man, just stop calling.
Amy: Oh, sweety, you can’t pull this off.
CHANDLER: You don't like that show?
Monica: Joey, did you even interview this woman before you asked her to move in?
Phoebe: I don't care. We're not paying you 300 dollars for this.
Phoebe: You mean in case someone is trying to steal your bamboo sleeping mat or your kettle of fish?
Chandler: Yeah, I think I do! Y'know what? You move in with her! You move in with her right now! Maybe I should in with Monica!
Phoebe: I need to talk to you, its pretty urgent. Its about Monica and Chandler.
Vince: (to Phoebe) Look, I gotta go. I'm on call tonight. (kisses her) See you Saturday. (leaves)
Ross: (in a 5 year olds tone) (To Monica) You are such a tattletale! Mom, Dad, you remember that-that time you walked in my room and smelled marijuana?
Rachel: Youre a pathetic loser, right?
Phoebe Sr.: Well, Im so sorry. I thought I was leaving you with the best parents in the world, I didnt even hear about your Mom and Dad til a couple of years ago, and by then you were already grown up. I dont know, youre here, and I would, I would really, I would like to get to know you.
Phoebe: Joey, you can't make someone do something they don't want to do. Believe me, there's something I've been trying to get Mike to do in bed and there's... he's just...
ROSS: Do you say this stuff to girls?
Kiki: Well, we were in the city shopping, and your mom said you work here, aaand it's true!
Joey: Did you tell the guy you wanted to have sex with his wife and then fall right out of your chair?
Rachel: Ohh, okay, Im sorry. Youre right. Yknow what? We absolutely can stay married, because I was under the impression that the boxes were far away from each other. All right, look, just please, take a moment here and think about what youre asking of me.
Rachel: No, it's just... look, you know, when I first moved to the city I was a lot like her! I was spoiled, self-centered and you guys really took care of me.
Chandler: I mean, don't you think if things were gonna happen with Rachel, they would've happened already?
SUSIE: How you doin there squirmy?
Joey: (muffled by the mouth guard) Hey you guys! Whats happening?
Joey: Ross good, I'm uh glad you're here. I wanna talk to you about something.
Joey: Its Ba-go-ta, but close enough. Now, you can either pass your turn to Ross or pick a Wicked Wango card.
Phoebe: Well, its a long story. Its kind of embarrassing. Lets just say there was a typographical error with a sex manual. (The guy laughs.) How about you?
Joey: Now? You want me to go over there now?
Ross: Come on, would you grow up? Its no big deal.
Ross: No! The guy is mean. I mean really mean. I think you should stay away from him.
Laura: Well, I'm sorry I brought it up. So, are either one of you planning on staying at home with your child... (someone knocks on the door)
RACHEL: Well, there's you.
RACHEL: Well, well um, you know, these movies are offensive and uh, degrading to women and females. And uh, and the lighting's always unflattering. And, Monica help me out here.
MONICA: You really ok with it?
Monica:: what's the big deal, you forgot, she forgot, maybe you were having an off night
Joey: Come on, you guys are more then that! I mean, youre gonna get together right?
Ross: Right, you're not even getting your honeymoon, God.. No, no, although, Aruba, this time of year... talk about your- (thinks) -big lizards... Anyway, if you don't feel like being alone tonight, Joey and Chandler are coming over to help me put together my new furniture.
Joshua: Whats up? Youre voice sounded all squeaky on the phone.
Chandler: (entering) Have you seen Joey?
Monica: Oh my God, it's gonna WORK! We're gonna make it work! I'm gonna be a mummy and (to Chandler) you're gonna be a daddy! All right, I'll see you suckers. I'm gonna get me... A BABY! {she leaves)
Joey: That's OK, Ross, you can ask me. What?
Chandler: I'm telling ya! It's gonna happen. Next year it's gonna be you, me and the little Hemingway Bing. (pause) What, he's my favourite author!
JOEY: Man you are incredible.
RICHARD: Uh, Phoebe, I don't think your mom would want you to see what's about to happen.
Mr. Geller: Don't listen to your mother. You're independent, and you always have been! Even when you were a kid... and you were chubby, and you had no friends, you were just fine! And you would read alone in your room, and your puzzles...
Phoebe: (To Joey) You ate meat! (Joey is shocked) (To Chandler and Monica) You had sex! (Theyre shocked.)
Ross: Oh, come on, now you know you want em.
ROSS: Oh. And what do you call that?
Joey: Yeah well thats because uh I stayed in my room. Yeah, you dont want to look in my hamper.
Joey: Ross! Ross! Ross, listen! Who are you kissing at midnight, huh? Rachel or Phoebe?