words in movies
Chandler: Pheebs, can you help me pick out an engagement ring for Monica? I cant figure this out! Its so hard! Should I get her a (turning to each page) Tiffany cut or a Princess cut or aah-ah! Paper cut!
Phoebe: Now, have you told anyone else?
Phoebe: You told me.
Chandler: Well, its because I trust you, youre one of my best friends, and you walked in on me when I was looking at ring brochures.
Phoebe: Yeah well, once again not knocking pays off. I only wish you hadnt been on the toilet.
Ross: Oh perfect, we were just gonna see if you wanted to go.
Joey: Oh, Im sorry. You wanna bite? (Holds his piece out for him.)
Phoebe: Thats easy! You just have to think of him as a-as a jar of pickles that wont open.
Rachel: So what are you saying; I should run him under hot water and bang his head against a table?
Phoebe: No thats what you do when you want to get the truth out of someone.
Paul: (To Rachel) How are you?
Phoebe: So how are things going with you?
Ross: Great to see you!
Paul: Good to see you too!
Ross: How you doing?
Ross: Okay! You take care!
Ross: Hey Pheebs, what-what was the deal with you and Chandler blowing us off before?
Ross: Phoebe, whyd you do it?
Phoebe: I didnt do it! It was Chandler! Hes Hes mad at you!
Phoebe: Please, I think you know why.
Phoebe: Come on Ross, youre a paleontologist, dig a little deeper.
Phoebe: Do you think thats something that hed be mad at you for?
Phoebe: Oh, if thats what you want you then you really should run his head under hot water and bang his head against a table.
Rachel: Okay. Hey, what are you thinking? What are you thinking right now?
Paul: Im thinking that you are looking really fine it that dress.
Paul: Are you talking about having sex?
Rachel: No Paul, I dont know anything about you! Yknow, like-like your childhood! Tell me about your childhood!
Rachel: Okay, well then how about puberty! Come on, thats always a painful time! Yknow your friends invite you to a slumber party and then they stick your hand in warm water while youre sleeping so that you pee in your sleeping bag.
Rachel: Well, youre lucky you never met that bitch Sharon Majesky. Anyway, umm The rest of you life, yknow? Any regrets?
Paul: I wanted a big wheel. And instead my parents got me this little plastic chicken that you hop around on. It was embarrassing; kids made fun of me. That was a pretty tough year.
Rachel: Thats-thats great! See? I already feel like I know you a little better! Thank you. Okay, come on. Now we can go eat. Lets go. (Gets up to leave, but Paul doesnt move.)
Paul: And in fifth grade I got into a fight. Well, it wasnt really a fight. Richard Darinvel bit me on the nose and, and I feel down. I still have a little scare right here (points to it) you can see it.
Rachel: Yeah. Yeah, I-I-I see the scare. Listen, Paul, I think this is really great that-that yknow, you shared your feelings. Its really, its beautiful, but umm, what do you say we go share some food?
Rachel: What?! Wait! What are you talking about?! You love their Kung Pao Chicken!
Phoebe: Okay, so maybe you dont get her a ring. Maybe you-maybe you do something different. Yknow? Maybe you get her an engagement bracelet, yknow? Or an engagement tiara? Orooh! An engagement Revolutionary War musket! (Picks one up from the display in the corner.
Chandler: Yknow, Im so glad I picked you to help me with this.
Phoebe: Huh? Can you just imagine getting down on one knee and handing her this gorgeous piece of weaponry?
Phoebe: (coming over after returning the musket) Wait a minute, no, this is, this is the reason you brought me. Okay? I know how to haggle. So let me handle this from here on out.
Male Jeweler: Can I help you?
Chandler: Sir, can I ask you to umm, could you hold out that ring and ask me to marry you?
Male Jeweler: Okay. (Holds out the ring, deadpan.) Will you marry me?
Phoebe: We will give you $10.
Male Jeweler: (angrily) Are you interested in this ring?!
Male Jeweler: (ignoring her) How would you like to pay?
Chandler: Uh, credit card. (Reaches for it then realizes) Oh no! No-no, but I left my credit card with Joey. (To Phoebe) Okay, Ill go get it. You guard the ring.
Phoebe: Okay. (To the jeweler) Listen, Im sorry about before. Do you have anything her for $10.
Phoebe: Ill give you $1 for them.
Gunther: (handing them the bill) Here you go.
Joey: Hey-hey-hey-ho-ho, I got this one. Here you go. (Hands Gunther Chandlers card.) Yknow I gotta tell ya, sometimes I justI dont get Chandler. Yknow, me and him do stuff all the time without you and you dont get all upset.
Rachel: Oh thats right. Youre the talker. (They both reflect on that briefly) Anyway uh, great idea! Umm, I gotta go to the store; I told him that I would buy him some more tissues.
Rachel: No you dont!
Phoebe: Okay umm, Id also like to try on the tiara. (The male jeweler hands it to her.) Oh yeah. Okay. (Puts it on.) (To the jeweler) What do you think, too much?
Paul: (acting manly to try and cover up his crying) Okay. Chandler, did your dad ever hug you?
Chandler: No, did he hug you?!
Chandler: Well, you can see my dad in Vegas kissing other dads.
Paul: Would you .Would you hug me?
Chandler: Okay, a quick one. Come on hug it out. (Paul rushes over and hugs Chandler tightly.) Oh hey! There you go. (The hug continues.) Okay. (The hug continues.)
Chandler: Do you have my credit card?
Joey: Come on! Itll be fun! Me, you, and Ross, and Paul probably
Phoebe: Oh my God Chandler, the one you picked is gone. Its over!
Chandler: They put you in jail?
Chandler: Phoebe, I asked you to guard the ring!
Ross: I cant believe it. (Pause) Can I tell you something? Im a little mad at him now.
Joey: Can I tell you something? Me too.
Rachel: I dont care about the little dude! I cant! I cannot listen to anymore of this! Yknow, the only person who would want to listen to this is a mental health professional! And then its only because they get paid $100 an hour! Do you know how much money I couldve made listening to you? $2,000! And do you know when I figured that out? While you were talking!
Paul: What?! I cant believe youre trying to stifle me! When just 14 hours ago we figured out that that is exactly what my mother was trying to do to me!
Rachel: Oh Im sorry. I I-I dont meanI didnt mean to stifle you. I This is all just a little overwhelming.
Paul: Oh Rachel, Im so sorry. I didnt mean to overwhelm you. Its just that, when those gates open, you (Starts to breakdown.) Hard to close em. But they are closed now. Believe me.
Rachel: Im so glad, Im so glad you shared. (Feeling his shoulder.) And Im glad that youre done. What do you say we umm (Nods in the direction of the bedroom.)
Chandler: I cant believe I let you talk me into buying this stupid gumball machine looking ring!
Phoebe: Well you certainly cant give her that stupid gumball ring.
Phoebe: Wow! Youre good! After this, we should solve crimes.
Phoebe: Oh, okay. (Walks over to him.) Excuse me sir? Could you come with me please? You have a phone call.
Customer: Do you know who at my office?
Chandler: (to him) Hi! Hi. Okay, there was a slight mix-up at the jewelry store, the ring youre about to propose with was supposed to be held for me. So, Im gonna need to have that back. (The guy isnt sure.) But, in exchange Im willing to trade you this beautiful, more expensive ring. (Looking at the ring.) Ew.
Customer: It is beautiful, but Im gonna use this one. Now, if youll excuse me.
Chandler: No-no! This is my fiancee (Phoebe) and her heart was set on that ring. You dont want to break her heart now do you?
Phoebe: Yeah, do you want to break a dying womans heart?
Customer: Youre dying?!
Chandler: Thank you. Thank you. Thank you! (To his girlfriend) And you are about to marry a wonderful man! (She stunned and hes horrified.) Hey! Im marrying a dead woman!
Ross: So you two are really serious?!
Chandler: Okay! (They hug.) I was gonna wait til uh, it was official yknow? But I got so excited I just had to tell you guys because youre my best friends.
Rachel: (who has just entered) Ugh! No more crying! Please! I just dumped one cry baby, Ill dump you too!
Rachel: Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh Chandler!! (Hugs him.) You guys are gonna be so happy!
Ross: You told her before you told us?
Chandler: Well, she walked in when I was looking at the ring brochures. You can understand that, right? (Ross and Joey look at each other and go back to watching the game on TV.) Guys? Guys? (Walks in front of them again.)
Chandler: Can I just say how much I appreciate you coming with me. When we get to Tulsa I'm taking you for a great dinner at 'Slim Pickings'. 'So Cheesy'? 'Whole Hog'? It's going to be tough to keep Kosher in Tulsa.
Ross: Wow! This picture of you sure is steamy.
Joey: Of course! Only an idiot would wear this stuff if you didnt have the car! Right?
Rachel: Oh yeah, scared the hell out of me. I thought wed lost you forever. Pheebs, you lie down?
Monica: Well, if you really think about it, I mean four days is not that long. I mean, I see you Monday before you go to work, and I see you Thursday when you get back, and I always work late on Tuesdays, so really if you think about it, it's really just one day. And well, if we can't make it one day, we've got real problems my friend.
The Saleswoman: You wanna return this couch? (Ross nods yes.) It's cut in half!
Ross: Hey you guys, I need some fashion advice.
Ross: Oh but I-I-I haven't paid you yet!
Rachel: No, you're not! Last week you thought Ross was trying to kill you!
Monica: What-what was it you were gonna tell us?
Monica: Phoebe! You kinda caught me at a bad time.
Monica: Whoa-whoa-whoa, Phoebe you gotta take her! Yknow I-I-I said some really bad stuff about her, but yknow Rachel has some good qualities that make her a good roommate.
Mike: No but... You don't want to get married either right?
Joey: Now, wait a second! You make food and robots?
Ross: Im sorry I had to take such drastic measures to make my point, but Ilook, I just want you guys to be safe. (Monica comes out to throw out the garbage and Ross screams ) DANGER!!!!! (She completely ignores him and keeps walking.) Ahhh, huh? Unagi.
Joey: We want you to be happy. And I may only have a couple beers in me, but... I love you, man. (Joey gives Ross a hug)
The Cooking Teacher: I think you should give him your star.
RACHEL: Ok, so Phoebe, now are you gonna call your dad and let him know that his dog is ok?
Monica: Thank you. (To Chandler.) I think I just had a tiny orgasm.
Joey: I'll kick that door in if you give me a little sugar.
Monica: Are you gonna be ok, officer, uhm,...
Roger: Listen guys, it was great seeing you again. Mon, um, easy on those cookies, okay? Remember, they're just food, they're not love.
INTERVIEWER: So, uh, what are you going to do next?
Ross: Oh, what are you going to do, follow me down there?
Phoebe: I dontLook I dont know what youre complaining about now? You were both aware of the situation!
Monica: Yeah, but he wants to talk to you before anything really happens with her. And as his friend, I mean, don't you think he deserves the same from you?
Ross: You know, I think thats a great idea. It'll be like the pilgrims bringing the Indians syphilis.
The Casting Director: Oh and your agent said you were okay with the nudity.
Rachel: (To Ross) I dont know. (To the gang.) What do you mean last night? Nothing, nothing uh, happened last night.
Kate: Right, at the end, you choked on a cookie.
Mona: Ross, we we have to be strong. Okay, I-Im gonna go. (She picks up the shirt Ross has just set down.) Can I? To remember you?
Ross: Wha... what do you mean? (Goes to the laptop)
PHOEBE: You just abandoned your whole belief system. I mean, before, I didn't agree with you, but at least I respected you. How, how, how are you going to go into work tomorrow? How, how are you going to face the other science guys? How, how are you going to face yourself? Oh! That was fun. So who's hungry?
Rachel: Thanks, you can just put it on the table.
Monica: You went to one where you were popular, and you got to ride off Chips motorcycle, and wear his letterman jacket. I went to one where I wore a band uniform they had to have specially made.
Erica: Oh yeah. I actually liked you guys. But it doesn't matter, because what you did was wrong. (walks away again, but Chandler catches up with her again)
JOEY: One of the virus victims called in sick, so Cathy recommended me and boom, I'm dying on the gurney. Oh Ross, Marcel just finished his last scene if you want to go down there and say goodbye.
Chandler: Really? Like you have a routine?
Joey: You guys have one of those signs that says: 'We don't swim in your toilet, so don't pee in our pool.', you know.
Joey: Im falling in love with you.
Ross: Uh, okay, yeah, we could do that, but before we head off to the murder capital of the North-East, I was, uh, kinda wanting to run something by you. Y'know how we were, uh, y'know, talking before about, uh, relationships and stuff? (Uncorks the wine) Well-
DR. BURKE: No no. Henry's almost two and he's talking and everyting. Here. You know, the other day he told me he liked me better than his other grandpa. Now in all fairness his other grandpa's a drunk but still. . .
Monica: How about if I dance around all covered in sauce? Huh? You think its funny now?
Rachel: Alright, fine, you go ahead and you do that, alright Ross.
Rachel: Are you makin him a sandwich?
Chandler: (To Monica) Oh, well thank you in advance. (Kisses her.)
Mrs. Geller: Oh, Martha Ludwin's daughter is gonna call you. (Tastes a snack) Mmm! What's that curry taste?
Monica: (interrupting) Honey, I just don't think that you understood the joke.
Tag: How did you know they were in my bottom drawer?
Parker: Isnt this the most incredible fight youve ever had in your entire life?
Phoebe: Well, I think that shirt makes you look like you should work at a Baskin Robbins... Anyway... Hey, isn't Joey's agent Estelle Leonard?
Joey: (To Chandler) Dude! What are yoyou trying to kill me?!
JOEY: Really, hey, you mind if I turn the heat down?
ROSS: Julie. Julie. That. Oh God. Julie, right. OK, I need to lie down. No, ya know, I'm gonna stand. I'm gonna stand, I'm gonna walk, I'm walkin' and I am standing. OK so you uh, and now wha... and now, now, now you're over me?
Chandler: (pours more and slides the refill to Joey) All right, say you do that. You know sooner or later somebody's gonna come along that slices a better cheddar. And then where're you gonna run?
ROSS: Uh, hold, let me see, I don't know. So what're you gonna do. . . [doorbell rings]
Monica: (looking at Rachels jeans) Where did you get those jeans?!
Phoebe: Oh, you are so going to Minsk. You belong in Minsk. You can't stay here just 'cause of me.
Joey: He said that he wasnt gonna apologize because you guys are living here illegally, so instead what hes gonna do is have you evictedIll see you later.
Ross: (entering from the bathrooms) Hey Chandler, what are you doing tonight?
Joey: Hmm. Do you sleep with women and never call them again?
Rachel: Okay..Okay.. Look. Im sorry that I lied to you before. You were right. Ralph and I were an item but were not anymore.
Chandler: (incredulous) I dont know what thats like?! Up until I was 25 I thought the only response to, "I love you," was, "Oh crap!"
Man: Alright, I gotta report you. What's your medallion number?
Ross: Oh see, before you uh, when you showed it to me you-you held it that way (he turns her hand upside down) which uh, which was misleading. Well Im (He goes at sits down at his new table and the kids stare at him.) Hello.
Monica: Wow! I Had no idea you had this much pride.
Ross: Okay, okay, awkward question. The hospital knows you took two, right?
Carol: You know that thing you put over here with the pin in it? It's time to take the pin out. You'll find someone, I know you will. The right woman is just waiting for you.
Ross: Hey, you're not naked! So hey, Rach, when will we expect to see you tonight?
Rachel: (angrily) No! All right?! I did not see the bird! I did not see the fish! I did not see the piece of Styrofoam that was shaped like Mike Tyson! I did not, because I was trying to teach you how to sail a boat! Which obviously is an impossible thing to do!
Rachel: Hi! Uhh, do you guys have plans for the weekend? Because I have my sister on hold, and she said that we could use her cabin for the weekend and go skiing. Huh? Im asking you first, right?!. I mean Im playing by the rules.
Rachel: Oh, honey! Dont get up! What do you need?
Ross: Yeah, he-hes right, hes right. This is your time y'know, yeah, youre young, youre-youre weird, chicks dig that.
Joey: Dude, if you go back out there, youre gonna be Dead Ross!
Rachel: But you said that you liked him! I mean what happened?! Did ya just change your mind?!
Monica: Like asking her to move in with you?
Rachel: I haven't seen you in like.. a year.
Rachel: Was that all you wanted to ask me?
Phoebe: This is fashion?! (Grabs the coat from Rachel.) Okay, so to you, death is fashion?! That's really funny. (She puts the coat on and starts to model it.) Here's Phoebe umm, sporting uh, y'know, cutting edge hairy carcass from y'know, the steal traps of wintry Russia. I mean, you really thing this looks good? (Sees herself in the mirror.) 'Cause I do.
Joey: (lifts Rachel up and moves her behind him so she can walk on) Hey, here you go.
Ross: Hey, you gotta get Mom on the phone. Call Mom! Call Mom!
Monica: No, I want everything you just said. I want a marriage.
RACHEL: Well, I have to be, I don't really have a choice, I mean, you know, I could look at the bright side, I get two birthday parties and two birthday cakes.
The Salesman: (Entering before Joey can say anything) Good afternoon, are you the decision maker of the house?
Joey: And what?! Did you sleep with her?!
DR. REMORE: I know you do but you and I can never be together that way.
Joey: You know youve been spitting on me?!
Monica: She's this girl who used to live in the building before you did. Then she moved to England and she picked up this fake British accent. On the machine this is her message. (she apes Amanda using an awful British accent) "Monica, darling! It's Amanda calling!"
Monica: You wanted it to be a surprise.
Ross: You know sometimes your words... they hurt.
Joey: Hey, hey, uh, who did you miss the most?
Elizabeth: Oh yeah. So umm, did you have a nickname for me?
Joey: I don't know. But hey, I know we can decide. Okay, I'm gonna ask you questions and you answer real quick. Okay?
Dr. Ledbetter: I must say it's nice to see you back on your feet.
JOEY: And you feel like we hold you back.
Chandler: There's not gonna be a next time! You can not ever see him again!
Phoebe: Or...or we can chant and dance around naked, you know, with sticks.
Phoebe: I just cant decide who she looks more alike, you or Rachel?
PHOEBE: Ok, do you know how to go from D to A minor?
Joey: Back when you and Rachel were together, if Chandler had kissed her, would you hear him out?