words in movies
Monica: Do you realize this is probably the last time well all be here in the coffee house as six single people?
Chandler: Yep! From now on its gonna be the four of you guys and me and the misses. The little woman. The wife. The old ball and chain.
Ross: Oh, where are you guys going?
Ross: Ah. Joey youre-youre having lunch with my mom?
Ross: (To Chandler) Yknow what? Actually Im kinda glad theyre leaving cause uh, I need to talk to you about something.
Chandler: Listen, if you want to borrow money, its kind of a bad time. Im buying dinner for 128 people tomorrow night.
Ross: No, its Its not that. Umm, now what Im going to say to you, Im not saying as your friend. Okay? Im-Im saying as it as Monicas older brother.
Chandler: But youre still my friend?
Chandler: During this time are you, are you still my best man?
Chandler: Do I still call you Ross?
Ross: Okay! You guys are getting married tomorrow and-and I couldnt be more thrilled for both of you, but as Monicas older brother I-I have to tell you this. If you ever hurt my little sister, if you ever cause her any unhappiness of any kind, I will hunt you down, and kick your ass! (Chandler laughs.) What? Im-Im-Im serious! (Chandler laughs harder.) ComeHey! Dude! Stop it! Okay? Im-Im not kidding here!
Chandler: Okay. (Pause) You wont believe what Monicas older brother just said to me!
Joey: (entering) Hey! You guys! Remember that audition I had a while ago and didnt get the part?
Monica: Wait! Wait! Wait! You cant start today! Todays the rehearsal dinner!
Monica: Oh. Well then way to go you big movie star!
Joey: I know! All right, Ill see you guys over there! Im off to fight the Nazis.
Rachel: Youre gonna be late! Go! Go! (He runs out.)
The Assistant Director: (to another actor) Richard? Were ready for you. (Richard approaches.) Joey Tribbiani? This is Richard Crosby hes playing Vincent.
Joey: Im doing my scenes with you?
Richard: Nice to meet you Joey.
Joey: Wow! I cant believe this! This is incredible. I mean you just won an Oscar!
Joey: I think you did.
The Director: (approaching) Okay! Were about an hour away from getting the scene lit. So uh, if you guys dont mind, can we run it a couple of times?
The Director: Hang on a minute! Joey, you keep touching your face. Is something wrong?
Chandler: (entering from the bedroom) Okay. Heres a question you never have to ask. My dad just called and wanted to know if he could borrow one of your pearl necklaces.
Monica: Hey, do you realize that at this time tomorrow well be getting married?
Chandler: Well you dont have to sound so surprised.
Monica: Well honestly ever since we got engaged I have been waiting for something to, to flip you out.
Monica: Ohh, Im so glad. Thank you so much for staying so calm during this. I mean its really, its made me stay calm. (Chandler just looks at her.) I coulda been worse!
Monica: (voice on answering machine) Hi! If youre calling before Saturday, youve reached Monica and Chandler. But if youre calling after Saturday, youve reached Mr. and Mrs. Bing! Please leave a message for the Bings!
Rachel: Hi! Oh you guys look so beautiful!
Ross: (walks up) Wow Monica! Hey, just so you know I had my uh, older brother chat with Chandler.
Ross: Well I I told him that if he ever hurt you I would hunt him down and kick his ass! (The girls all laugh.) What?! What?! What is the matter with everybody?! I am serious! I would kick his ass! (The laugh harder.)
Mrs. Bing: Oh honey! This is so exciting! I thought we screwed you up so bad this day would never come. Oh and just think. Soon therell be lots of little Bings. (He freaks out and loosens the tie again.)
Mrs. Geller: (shaking her hand) Its lovely to meet you.
Mr. Geller: (shaking her hand) So are you his mother or his father?
Monica: Dad! Theres Ross (points), why dont you go talk to him?
Monica: It-its so great to see you both here.
Mr. Bing: Yes! Although, I think we may be seeing a little too much of some people. Arent you a little old to be wearing a dress like that?
Mrs. Bing: Dont you have a little too much penis to be wearing a dress like that?
Mr. Geller: of course you can kick his ass son.
Mrs. Geller: You could kick anyones ass you want too.
Ross: Thanks you guys. (Walks away happily and his parents smile.)
Monica: Oh, Rach! Rach! Umm hey, could you do me a favor and would talk to Chandlers dad and try to keep him away from Chandlers mom?
Ross: Dad dad, please! As I was saying umm, Im Dr. Ross Geller. Uhh, and Im the best man. And uh, this marriage is doubly special for me umm, because not only is the groom my best friend but uh, the bride is my little sister. And, shes the greatest sister a guy could ask for. So if youd all please join me in raising a glass to the, the couple were here to celebrate. (Everyone does so.) To the Bings.
Monica: Yknow what? Youre right, Im sorry. Actually you were a big help tonight. Yeah, and thanks for putting my grandmother in the cab and making sure she got to the hotel safely.
Joey: Hey! Where have you been?
Ross: What? Are you going back to work?
Joey: Great! All right. Ill see you later. (He starts to leave.)
Phoebe: (pointing at Ross) Okay but if you dont find him and bring him back, I am gonna hunt you down and kick your ass!
Richard: Hey Joey, could you uh, go through these lines with me? (Hes holding a script.)
Richard: Could you uh, could you lower your script? I need to see your face so I can uh, play off your reaction.
Joey: Okay uh, look I know youre a great actor, okay? And you play all those Shakespeare guys and stuff
Joey: But youre spittin all over me man!
Joey: You know youve been spitting on me?!
Richard: Thats what real actors do! Annunciation is the mark of a good actor! And when you enunciate, you spit! (Spits on the t)
Ross: Gunther have you uh, have you seen Chandler?
Ross: Yes. Yes. Dont worry. Everythings fine. Well uh, well see you tomorrow at the wedding.
Ross: Well then well-well see you the day after tomorrow. (Walks away slowly, but notices something.) Mom?! Dad?! (Theyre sitting by the window.) What-what what you guys doing here?!
Mr. Geller: Well you kids talk about this place so much, we thought wed see what all the fuss is about.
Ross: Yes! No-no! I know, I know what the list is! Mom! Look if you see Chandler, could you just let him know Im looking for him?
Mr. Geller: And if you see Rita Moreno, let her know Im looking for her.
Joey: You went through my personal property?
Richard: Oh youre awesome! And, in that last speech? You soaked me.
The Assistant Director: You are now.
Joey: No! No! I cant! You gotta get me out of it! Ive got plans! (Spits.) Important plans! (Spits on the Ps.)
Phoebe: Shhh! Stop it! Stop it Rachel! You cant do this here! (She drags her into the bathroom.)
Phoebe: Yeah, but youve got to pull yourself together! Monica cant see you like this! Then shell know somethings wrong!
Rachel: I know. I know. Oh God. (Looking around) Theres no tissue! Can you grab me some toilet paper?
Rachel: Oh thank you! (Wiping her nose.) Oh God! (She throws it out.) Can I have another one?
Phoebe: (looking into the trash can) Sure. (Reaching into the trash can.) Do you need some floss? (Grabs a piece of it.)
Phoebe: Hey, do you think this is why Chandler took off?
Phoebe: Yeah, okay. Hey, wait. Do you know what kind of birth control she was using?
Phoebe: You told them he was missing?
Ross: Well, cant you at least stall her a little? Ill-Ill go back to some of the places I went last night.
Rachel: All right, well how much time do you need?
Rachel: Then why do you ask?!
Phoebe: Okay. Im going with you.
Phoebe: Ross, youre tired. Youve been looking all night. And clearly you suck at this.
Rachel: All right, Ill see you guys later.
Phoebe: Okay. Wait, do you know how youre going to stall her?
Rachel: Okay uh, but before you do that. I-I, I need you to talk to me.
Monica: Yeah you will! The right guy is just around the corner! Okay, are we done with that?
Monica: (jumping up) Rachel! You okay?
The Director: Joey, you gotta stay until the end. We cant stop filming just for you. Its not like its your wedding. (Starts to walk away.)
Joey: Yeah, I-I just made up the stuff about the wedding because I didnt want you to worry about me. But, Im having surgery today.
The Director: But youre supposed to work on Monday.
The Director: But youre not bald.
The Director: Look Joey, theres nothing I can do. Besides, youre probably gonna be out by four anyway. Weve just got one short scene. Its just you and Richard, and God knows hes a pro. Youll be fine. (Walks away and sees Richard entering.) Morning Richard.
Joey: Hey! Youre here! Great! Great! Great! Lets get going buddy, weve got a scene to shoot!
Joey: Are you drunk?
Joey: Yes you are!
Ross: Aw, yknow Yknow, maybe were-were just approaching this all wrong. If youre Chandler and-and you wanna hide, where is the last place on Earth people would think youd go?
Chandler: How did you guys find me? I knew I shouldve hid at the gym!
Phoebe: What the hell are you doing?!
Ross: Shes fine. She doesnt know youre gone. And she doesnt have to know, okay? Now come on, were going home.
Ross: Chandler, have you ever put on a black cocktail dress and asked me up to your hotel room?
Ross: Then you are neither of your parents!
Phoebe: But look Chandler, right now, no one has a lower opinion of you than I do. But I totally believe you can do this.
Ross: Yknow, okay. Youre right. It is huge. So why dont we take it just a little bit at a time? Okay? Umm, forget getting married for a sec; just forget about it. Can you just come home and take a shower?
Chandler: Depends on what you mean by we.
Rachel: Okay. All right. (Gets up.) Honey listen. When I tell you what Im about to tell you, I need you to remember that we are all here for you and that we love you.
Monica: Okay, youre-youre really freaking me out.
Monica: How can that be?! Oh wait! Wait! Are you, are you serious?!
Joey: I would sooner die in this hellhole then see her back with you!
Richard: (To Joey) Are you a little off today? Its going terribly slowly.
Joey: Look, my best friends are getting married in like an hour. Okay? And Im the minister. Please! Please! Can you pull it together?
Richard: Of course! Im-Im sorry. I-Id hate you to miss anything like that on account of me. I can do this!
Joey: Thank you. Thank you.
Joey: I would sooner die in this hellhole then see her back with you!
Phoebe: So-so you two were married huh? What happened? You just drift apart?
Rachel: You look so beautiful.
Rachel: What? Why? Where are you?
Joey: Hey! Dont you hang up on me! Ill marry you and me right now! I have the power!
Ross: There you go. You put on a tuxedo! Now that wasnt so scary, was it?
Ross: Im telling you, just a little bit at a time.
Ross: Getting married. (Chandler panics.) Okay. Okay. You can, you can do that too! Just like youve done everything else!
Chandler: Yeah. Youre right. Hey I-I can do that.
Ross: WhHeyWhoa-whoa, where, where you going?!
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Wait! Maybe, maybe youre overreacting! You do that yknow.
Rachel: Anastassakis/Papasifakis wedding, excellent! {Its a good thing Jennifer Aniston is Greek, because she had to pronounce those names. Luckily for me, they were written on a sign.}(The happy couple emerges.) Congratulations. (To the best man and maid of honor) Mazel Tov! (The rabbi emerges.) Hi! Oh, great hat. (Hes wearing an interesting hat and she takes him over to talk.) Listen umm, I need you to perform another wedding. Can you do that?
Mr. Geller: I thought he was with you.
Mr. Geller: You cant ask us son, thats cheating.
Ross: (pause) Youre right, thanks for keeping me honest dad.
Ross: Great. Hes doing great. Dont you worry about Chandler.
Monica: Are you okay?
Monica: Well, youre-youre sweating.
Ross: Uh Phoebe, can I see you for a second?
Phoebe: Oh my God! Why would you play hide and seek with someone you know is a flight risk?!
Joey: Aaron! You gotta let me go. The guys hammered!
Richard: You wouldnt happen to have a very big fork?
Joey: Yeah! You you were wonderful.
Richard: As were you.
Joey: Thats what you told me.
Richard: Oh, thank you. Youre welcome. (He stands up, staggers to the couch, and starts to lie down.)
Ross: Youre not getting away this time mister! Unless you want that ass kicking we talked about!
Ross: Hiiii-Ya!! (Chandler lies back down.) Im serious! Youre not walking out on my sister!
Ross: Then where the hell have you been?!
Phoebe: You know?!
Chandler: Yeah, I heard you and Rachel talking.
Chandler: You dont know?
Phoebe: What? Youll hi-ya?
Ross: Oh my God. Oh my God! And youre-youre youre not freaking out?
Phoebe: Well you obviously didnt see Chucky 3.
Mr. Geller: Way to go son! I knew youd find him!
[Scene: The moment we waited for has finally arrived. Its time for Monica and Chandlers wedding. Weve got violins playing Every Breath You Take, weve got guests seated, and Chandler starts walking down the aisle with his parents on either arm.]
Mrs. Bing: Oh look at you! So handsome!
Chandler: You look beautiful mom. (His dad clears his throat.) You look beautiful too dad. I love you both. (He kisses his dad on the cheek) Im so glad you here. (He kisses his mom.)
The Rabbi: Are you Chandler?
Chandler: Are you Joey?
Mrs. Geller: Oh I wish youre grandmother had lived to see this.
Mr. Geller: I love you sweetheart. (He kisses her and they sit down.)
Chandler: You look beautiful. Is this new? (Her dress.)
Rachel: (leaning in) As are you
Joey: (entering) Thats my line! (He walks up the aisle and to the rabbi) I can take it from here, thanks. (To all) Dearly beloved, Im sorry Im a little late. You may be confused by this now, (Hes still in costume) but you wont be Memorial Day weekend 2002. Well, lets get started before the groom takes off again. Huh? (Monica is shocked and looks around.) We are gathered here today, to join this man and this woman in the bonds of holy matrimony. Ive known Monica and Chandler for a long time, and I can not imagine two people more perfect for each other. And now, as Ive left my notes in my dressing room. We shall proceed to the vows. Monica?
Monica: Chandler, for so long I I wondered if I would ever find my prince, my soul mate. Then three years ago, at another wedding I turned to a friend for comfort. And in stead, I found everything that Id ever been looking for my whole life. And now here we are with our future before us and I only want to spend it with you, my prince, my soul mate, my friend. Unless you dont want to. You go!
Chandler: (To Ross) No, thats okay. (Ross nods and retreats.) Monica I thought this was going to be the most difficult thing I ever gonna had to do. But when I saw you walking down that aisle I realized how simple it was. I love you. Any surprises that come our way its okay, because I will always love you. You are the person I was meant to spend the rest of my life with. You wanna know if Im sure? (He leans in and kisses her.)
Joey: You may not kiss the bride. So, I guess by the powers vested in my by the state of New York and the Internet guys, I now pronounce you husband and wife. Oh wait! Do you take each other?
Joey: Yeah you do!
Joey: We good? Yeah? Good? Once again, I pronounce you husband and wife. (To Chandler) Now kiss her again.
Chandler: (To Monica) I love you. And I know about the baby.
{Transcribers Note: There was no trailer for this episode. See you in season 8; which will start this fall.}
Mike: Phoebe you don't have to eat...
Monica: You said the baby.
Phoebe: Yeah. So, we can do it tomorrow night, you guys. It's Valentine's Day. It's perfect.
Joey: I can still hear you!
Joey: What youdont hold it like that! Youre lettin all the good stuff fall out.
Rachel: Hmm. Look, Ross, if you want your neighbors to like you, why don't you just pay the hundred bucks? The party's gonna cost you way more than that.
Interviewer: So it looks like youve got some great experience here. Lets see ahh, reason for leaving last job?
The Salesman: Yeah. Could you just sign right here please? (Hands him a clipboard.)
Phoebe: I think its important that you do.
Chandler: Hey, will you grab me a cruller? (Joey starts to groan and get up.) Sit down! Will you go to the hospital?!
MONICA: God, you are so lucky. I mean, I mean. . . you know what I mean.
Rachel: (on tape) Oh, thank God youre here! You have to help me! Were you just talking to yourself?
Rachel: I was just getting him to like you.
Rachel: Ross, its okay. You can come out.
Chandler: Look, I can�t do this. I can�t make luv to you while we�re fighting this way.
Chandler: Oh! (Puts his hand on her belly.) Shes growing inside you.
Rachel: WhYou dated my sister!
Monica: I gave you one job! (Starts to examin the lasagne through the bottom of the glass pan.)
Joey: That's not the point Chandler. The point is that you lied.
Phoebe: You mean like a doctor?
Phoebe: I see what youre doing!
Phoebe: Good! Good! I was just testing you.
Ross: You chipped in?!
JOEY: No no, seriously, Chandler and I were just talkin about this. He is so much cooler than our dads. [Chandler starts kicking him below the table] I mean, you know, our dad's are ok, ya know, but Richard is just- ow, ow. What are you kickin me for? Huh? I'm tryin to talk here.
Phoebe: Let's see! (Opens her address book.) Oh, you know who's great? Sandy Poophack.
Rachel: Well, I-I should've told you the truth.
Ross: Sweetie, you gotta relax. Everythings gonna be great, okay? Come on. Come on.
Phoebe: Yeah... Ogh... Okay, fine. You made your point. Can you please just be Mike Hannigan again?
Ross: Youre back.
Monica: Guys, you got your hair cut.
Rachel: (stands up as well) What?! Me?! What about you and your consummated like bunnies nonsense!
Paul: You have a son?
Rachel: Oh, thank you... (looks at his face trying to remember his name)
Phoebe: I know what time you said.
Phoebe: Thanks! So are you.
Ross: But now! Im there! Im totally there! Im-Im finally where you are!
Phoebe: How can people do that?... (All but Phoebe walk away from the window in disgust.) Oh, you guys, look! Ugly Naked Guy got gravity boots!
Phoebe: I will tell you as soon as you thank me for writing my book.
Precious: Screw you, Mike. You're a coward and a bastard, and I hope you rot in hell.
ROSS: C'mon, you know everyone I've been with. All, both of them.
Chandler: Hello Phoebe, I've been thinking about you all day. (He's holding the phone so that Monica can hear it as well.)
Ursula: Yeah, um, may we help you?
Joey: Oh, you know what you should do? You should walk all the way at the top of Statue of Liberty.
Emily: I mean, I can't-I can't be in the same room as her! It drives me mad just thinking of you being in the same room as her!
Paul: Are you yelling at me?!
Chandler: (To Monica) You have no trouble telling time now right?
Rachel: I just don't know if the world is ready for you and your bag.
Rachel: Oh no-no-no dont say but! No-no, buts never good! Lets just leave it at, you like me and I like you.
Phoebe: (dejected) Hi, you guys.
Rachel: It's so that I can spend Thanksgiving with my family. See, every year we go skiing in Vail, and normally my father pays for my ticket, but I sort of started the whole independence thing, you know, which is actually why I took this job.
Kristen: After you.
Ross: Oh no-no, after you. (She grabs a chair and heads upstairs.) (When shes gone.) Oh my God! (He drops the box and Chandler cant pick it up.)
Customer: You idiot, you stupid cowboy, you blinded me, I'm suing!
Chandler: My Catholic friend is right. She's distraught. You're there for her. You pick up the pieces, and then you usher in the age of Ross! (Ross and Chandler look off into the distance. Joey, wondering what they are looking at, looks in the same direction)
Rachel: Oh my God! Youre a 30 year old virgin!
Mr. Waltham: You spend half your life in the bathroom, why dont you ever go out the bloody window!
Chandler: Hey, I'm sorry, I should have given you guys my black book when I got married! Although it wasn't so much a book as a... napkin. With Janice's phone number on it.
The Dry Cleaner: Who are you?
Monica: You stole them from me!
Ross: So the first time you ask a guy out, he-he turns you down?
Phoebe: If you dont sail your boat, what do you do on it?
Gunther: What did I tell you about talking to your friends while youre working?
Ross: Yeah, well you never have the time. I mean, I dont feel like I even have a girlfriend anymore, Rachel.
Monica: A kiss? What are you talking about?
Monica: (to her son) Oh, hey handsome! Oh, I'm gonna love you so much that no woman is ever gonna be good enough for you! (To Chandler, on the verge of tears) Oh, we are so lucky!
Ross: Whoa-whoa-whoa, Knicks season opener tonight. I thought maybe you guys would come over and watch it.
RACHEL: [sarcastically] I've never wanted you more.
Janine: Well, I don't think there is anything to do. I mean I think you're really sweet, but I'm just not interested in you like that.
Rachel: Oh my God! You look so beautiful!
EDDIE: Oh, right, all right, you know what pallie I understand, consider me gone, you know what, I'll be out by the time you get home from work tomorrow.
Monica: Okay, everybody, this is Rachel, another Lincoln High survivor. (To Rachel) This is everybody, this is Chandler, and Phoebe, and Joey, and- you remember my brother Ross?
Rachel: Thank you.
Paul: Whats the matter honey? Did you see a little mouse?
Ross: What are you doing here?!
Rachel: Ohh, thank you.
Chandler: So, you heard it, you repeated it, so that must mean you wrote it.
Mr. Treeger:: Yeah. Well maybe you have heard about the Rent Stabilization Act of 1968!
Ross: (under the couch) You and your ice.
Rachel: Ahh. Thank you!
Elizabeth: Uh, you guys?
Paul: Im so happy that youre here.
Joey: You are? Ross, I'm sorry..
Paul: Why are you yelling?
ROB: That was great, the kids loved you.
RACHEL: No, no, I mean, no, c'mon you guys, I mean, c'mon look it's only eleven thirty. Let's just talk, we never just hang out and talk anymore.
Phoebe: Oh, if thats what you want you then you really should run his head under hot water and bang his head against a table.
Paula: Listen. As someone who's seen more than her fair share of bad beef, I'll tell you: that is not such a terrible thing. I mean, they're your friends, they're just looking out after you.
Joey: And while were down at the video store, you know what else we could rent? Die Hard! (Chandlers excited.) Oh, yknow what? I just remembered, that Everest thing is only available through mail order.
Joey: Are you all right?
Ross: You haven't by any chance chosen a groomsman yet, have you?
The Woman: Wow you look so beautiful! If I knew you, Id cry.
Joey: Sure, yeah. Will you just keep an eye on the chick and the duck?
Ross: No Chandler, everything! Like stuff you like, stuff she likes, technique, stamina, girth....
Joey: Yeah and the most important thing is that it wont be some like, stranger up there who barely knows you. Itll be me! And I swear Ill do a really good job. Plus, yknow I love you guys and-and it would really mean a lot to me.
Monica: Have you found your dress yet?
Ursula: Yeah, can I help you with something?
Chandler: (To Joey) Would you put that back on?! Monicas gonna be here any minute!
Monica: Yeah! So-so when are you getting married?
Ross: You were the 200-pound 11-year-old who rode her!
MONICA: Nothin', nothin', hey you're a cheapasaurus. I'm kidding, I'm kidding, thank you, I'm very greatful.