words in movies
Monica: Do you realize this is probably the last time well all be here in the coffee house as six single people?
Chandler: Yep! From now on its gonna be the four of you guys and me and the misses. The little woman. The wife. The old ball and chain.
Ross: Oh, where are you guys going?
Ross: Ah. Joey youre-youre having lunch with my mom?
Ross: (To Chandler) Yknow what? Actually Im kinda glad theyre leaving cause uh, I need to talk to you about something.
Chandler: Listen, if you want to borrow money, its kind of a bad time. Im buying dinner for 128 people tomorrow night.
Ross: No, its Its not that. Umm, now what Im going to say to you, Im not saying as your friend. Okay? Im-Im saying as it as Monicas older brother.
Chandler: But youre still my friend?
Chandler: During this time are you, are you still my best man?
Chandler: Do I still call you Ross?
Ross: Okay! You guys are getting married tomorrow and-and I couldnt be more thrilled for both of you, but as Monicas older brother I-I have to tell you this. If you ever hurt my little sister, if you ever cause her any unhappiness of any kind, I will hunt you down, and kick your ass! (Chandler laughs.) What? Im-Im-Im serious! (Chandler laughs harder.) ComeHey! Dude! Stop it! Okay? Im-Im not kidding here!
Chandler: Okay. (Pause) You wont believe what Monicas older brother just said to me!
Joey: (entering) Hey! You guys! Remember that audition I had a while ago and didnt get the part?
Monica: Wait! Wait! Wait! You cant start today! Todays the rehearsal dinner!
Monica: Oh. Well then way to go you big movie star!
Joey: I know! All right, Ill see you guys over there! Im off to fight the Nazis.
Rachel: Youre gonna be late! Go! Go! (He runs out.)
The Assistant Director: (to another actor) Richard? Were ready for you. (Richard approaches.) Joey Tribbiani? This is Richard Crosby hes playing Vincent.
Joey: Im doing my scenes with you?
Richard: Nice to meet you Joey.
Joey: Wow! I cant believe this! This is incredible. I mean you just won an Oscar!
Joey: I think you did.
The Director: (approaching) Okay! Were about an hour away from getting the scene lit. So uh, if you guys dont mind, can we run it a couple of times?
The Director: Hang on a minute! Joey, you keep touching your face. Is something wrong?
Chandler: (entering from the bedroom) Okay. Heres a question you never have to ask. My dad just called and wanted to know if he could borrow one of your pearl necklaces.
Monica: Hey, do you realize that at this time tomorrow well be getting married?
Chandler: Well you dont have to sound so surprised.
Monica: Well honestly ever since we got engaged I have been waiting for something to, to flip you out.
Monica: Ohh, Im so glad. Thank you so much for staying so calm during this. I mean its really, its made me stay calm. (Chandler just looks at her.) I coulda been worse!
Monica: (voice on answering machine) Hi! If youre calling before Saturday, youve reached Monica and Chandler. But if youre calling after Saturday, youve reached Mr. and Mrs. Bing! Please leave a message for the Bings!
Rachel: Hi! Oh you guys look so beautiful!
Ross: (walks up) Wow Monica! Hey, just so you know I had my uh, older brother chat with Chandler.
Ross: Well I I told him that if he ever hurt you I would hunt him down and kick his ass! (The girls all laugh.) What?! What?! What is the matter with everybody?! I am serious! I would kick his ass! (The laugh harder.)
Mrs. Bing: Oh honey! This is so exciting! I thought we screwed you up so bad this day would never come. Oh and just think. Soon therell be lots of little Bings. (He freaks out and loosens the tie again.)
Mrs. Geller: (shaking her hand) Its lovely to meet you.
Mr. Geller: (shaking her hand) So are you his mother or his father?
Monica: Dad! Theres Ross (points), why dont you go talk to him?
Monica: It-its so great to see you both here.
Mr. Bing: Yes! Although, I think we may be seeing a little too much of some people. Arent you a little old to be wearing a dress like that?
Mrs. Bing: Dont you have a little too much penis to be wearing a dress like that?
Mr. Geller: of course you can kick his ass son.
Mrs. Geller: You could kick anyones ass you want too.
Ross: Thanks you guys. (Walks away happily and his parents smile.)
Monica: Oh, Rach! Rach! Umm hey, could you do me a favor and would talk to Chandlers dad and try to keep him away from Chandlers mom?
Ross: Dad dad, please! As I was saying umm, Im Dr. Ross Geller. Uhh, and Im the best man. And uh, this marriage is doubly special for me umm, because not only is the groom my best friend but uh, the bride is my little sister. And, shes the greatest sister a guy could ask for. So if youd all please join me in raising a glass to the, the couple were here to celebrate. (Everyone does so.) To the Bings.
Monica: Yknow what? Youre right, Im sorry. Actually you were a big help tonight. Yeah, and thanks for putting my grandmother in the cab and making sure she got to the hotel safely.
Joey: Hey! Where have you been?
Ross: What? Are you going back to work?
Joey: Great! All right. Ill see you later. (He starts to leave.)
Phoebe: (pointing at Ross) Okay but if you dont find him and bring him back, I am gonna hunt you down and kick your ass!
Richard: Hey Joey, could you uh, go through these lines with me? (Hes holding a script.)
Richard: Could you uh, could you lower your script? I need to see your face so I can uh, play off your reaction.
Joey: Okay uh, look I know youre a great actor, okay? And you play all those Shakespeare guys and stuff
Joey: But youre spittin all over me man!
Joey: You know youve been spitting on me?!
Richard: Thats what real actors do! Annunciation is the mark of a good actor! And when you enunciate, you spit! (Spits on the t)
Ross: Gunther have you uh, have you seen Chandler?
Ross: Yes. Yes. Dont worry. Everythings fine. Well uh, well see you tomorrow at the wedding.
Ross: Well then well-well see you the day after tomorrow. (Walks away slowly, but notices something.) Mom?! Dad?! (Theyre sitting by the window.) What-what what you guys doing here?!
Mr. Geller: Well you kids talk about this place so much, we thought wed see what all the fuss is about.
Ross: Yes! No-no! I know, I know what the list is! Mom! Look if you see Chandler, could you just let him know Im looking for him?
Mr. Geller: And if you see Rita Moreno, let her know Im looking for her.
Joey: You went through my personal property?
Richard: Oh youre awesome! And, in that last speech? You soaked me.
The Assistant Director: You are now.
Joey: No! No! I cant! You gotta get me out of it! Ive got plans! (Spits.) Important plans! (Spits on the Ps.)
Phoebe: Shhh! Stop it! Stop it Rachel! You cant do this here! (She drags her into the bathroom.)
Phoebe: Yeah, but youve got to pull yourself together! Monica cant see you like this! Then shell know somethings wrong!
Rachel: I know. I know. Oh God. (Looking around) Theres no tissue! Can you grab me some toilet paper?
Rachel: Oh thank you! (Wiping her nose.) Oh God! (She throws it out.) Can I have another one?
Phoebe: (looking into the trash can) Sure. (Reaching into the trash can.) Do you need some floss? (Grabs a piece of it.)
Phoebe: Hey, do you think this is why Chandler took off?
Phoebe: Yeah, okay. Hey, wait. Do you know what kind of birth control she was using?
Phoebe: You told them he was missing?
Ross: Well, cant you at least stall her a little? Ill-Ill go back to some of the places I went last night.
Rachel: All right, well how much time do you need?
Rachel: Then why do you ask?!
Phoebe: Okay. Im going with you.
Phoebe: Ross, youre tired. Youve been looking all night. And clearly you suck at this.
Rachel: All right, Ill see you guys later.
Phoebe: Okay. Wait, do you know how youre going to stall her?
Rachel: Okay uh, but before you do that. I-I, I need you to talk to me.
Monica: Yeah you will! The right guy is just around the corner! Okay, are we done with that?
Monica: (jumping up) Rachel! You okay?
The Director: Joey, you gotta stay until the end. We cant stop filming just for you. Its not like its your wedding. (Starts to walk away.)
Joey: Yeah, I-I just made up the stuff about the wedding because I didnt want you to worry about me. But, Im having surgery today.
The Director: But youre supposed to work on Monday.
The Director: But youre not bald.
The Director: Look Joey, theres nothing I can do. Besides, youre probably gonna be out by four anyway. Weve just got one short scene. Its just you and Richard, and God knows hes a pro. Youll be fine. (Walks away and sees Richard entering.) Morning Richard.
Joey: Hey! Youre here! Great! Great! Great! Lets get going buddy, weve got a scene to shoot!
Joey: Are you drunk?
Joey: Yes you are!
Ross: Aw, yknow Yknow, maybe were-were just approaching this all wrong. If youre Chandler and-and you wanna hide, where is the last place on Earth people would think youd go?
Chandler: How did you guys find me? I knew I shouldve hid at the gym!
Phoebe: What the hell are you doing?!
Ross: Shes fine. She doesnt know youre gone. And she doesnt have to know, okay? Now come on, were going home.
Ross: Chandler, have you ever put on a black cocktail dress and asked me up to your hotel room?
Ross: Then you are neither of your parents!
Phoebe: But look Chandler, right now, no one has a lower opinion of you than I do. But I totally believe you can do this.
Ross: Yknow, okay. Youre right. It is huge. So why dont we take it just a little bit at a time? Okay? Umm, forget getting married for a sec; just forget about it. Can you just come home and take a shower?
Chandler: Depends on what you mean by we.
Rachel: Okay. All right. (Gets up.) Honey listen. When I tell you what Im about to tell you, I need you to remember that we are all here for you and that we love you.
Monica: Okay, youre-youre really freaking me out.
Monica: How can that be?! Oh wait! Wait! Are you, are you serious?!
Joey: I would sooner die in this hellhole then see her back with you!
Richard: (To Joey) Are you a little off today? Its going terribly slowly.
Joey: Look, my best friends are getting married in like an hour. Okay? And Im the minister. Please! Please! Can you pull it together?
Richard: Of course! Im-Im sorry. I-Id hate you to miss anything like that on account of me. I can do this!
Joey: Thank you. Thank you.
Joey: I would sooner die in this hellhole then see her back with you!
Phoebe: So-so you two were married huh? What happened? You just drift apart?
Rachel: You look so beautiful.
Rachel: What? Why? Where are you?
Joey: Hey! Dont you hang up on me! Ill marry you and me right now! I have the power!
Ross: There you go. You put on a tuxedo! Now that wasnt so scary, was it?
Ross: Im telling you, just a little bit at a time.
Ross: Getting married. (Chandler panics.) Okay. Okay. You can, you can do that too! Just like youve done everything else!
Chandler: Yeah. Youre right. Hey I-I can do that.
Ross: WhHeyWhoa-whoa, where, where you going?!
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Wait! Maybe, maybe youre overreacting! You do that yknow.
Rachel: Anastassakis/Papasifakis wedding, excellent! {Its a good thing Jennifer Aniston is Greek, because she had to pronounce those names. Luckily for me, they were written on a sign.}(The happy couple emerges.) Congratulations. (To the best man and maid of honor) Mazel Tov! (The rabbi emerges.) Hi! Oh, great hat. (Hes wearing an interesting hat and she takes him over to talk.) Listen umm, I need you to perform another wedding. Can you do that?
Mr. Geller: I thought he was with you.
Mr. Geller: You cant ask us son, thats cheating.
Ross: (pause) Youre right, thanks for keeping me honest dad.
Ross: Great. Hes doing great. Dont you worry about Chandler.
Monica: Are you okay?
Monica: Well, youre-youre sweating.
Ross: Uh Phoebe, can I see you for a second?
Phoebe: Oh my God! Why would you play hide and seek with someone you know is a flight risk?!
Joey: Aaron! You gotta let me go. The guys hammered!
Richard: You wouldnt happen to have a very big fork?
Joey: Yeah! You you were wonderful.
Richard: As were you.
Joey: Thats what you told me.
Richard: Oh, thank you. Youre welcome. (He stands up, staggers to the couch, and starts to lie down.)
Ross: Youre not getting away this time mister! Unless you want that ass kicking we talked about!
Ross: Hiiii-Ya!! (Chandler lies back down.) Im serious! Youre not walking out on my sister!
Ross: Then where the hell have you been?!
Phoebe: You know?!
Chandler: Yeah, I heard you and Rachel talking.
Chandler: You dont know?
Phoebe: What? Youll hi-ya?
Ross: Oh my God. Oh my God! And youre-youre youre not freaking out?
Phoebe: Well you obviously didnt see Chucky 3.
Mr. Geller: Way to go son! I knew youd find him!
[Scene: The moment we waited for has finally arrived. Its time for Monica and Chandlers wedding. Weve got violins playing Every Breath You Take, weve got guests seated, and Chandler starts walking down the aisle with his parents on either arm.]
Mrs. Bing: Oh look at you! So handsome!
Chandler: You look beautiful mom. (His dad clears his throat.) You look beautiful too dad. I love you both. (He kisses his dad on the cheek) Im so glad you here. (He kisses his mom.)
The Rabbi: Are you Chandler?
Chandler: Are you Joey?
Mrs. Geller: Oh I wish youre grandmother had lived to see this.
Mr. Geller: I love you sweetheart. (He kisses her and they sit down.)
Chandler: You look beautiful. Is this new? (Her dress.)
Rachel: (leaning in) As are you
Joey: (entering) Thats my line! (He walks up the aisle and to the rabbi) I can take it from here, thanks. (To all) Dearly beloved, Im sorry Im a little late. You may be confused by this now, (Hes still in costume) but you wont be Memorial Day weekend 2002. Well, lets get started before the groom takes off again. Huh? (Monica is shocked and looks around.) We are gathered here today, to join this man and this woman in the bonds of holy matrimony. Ive known Monica and Chandler for a long time, and I can not imagine two people more perfect for each other. And now, as Ive left my notes in my dressing room. We shall proceed to the vows. Monica?
Monica: Chandler, for so long I I wondered if I would ever find my prince, my soul mate. Then three years ago, at another wedding I turned to a friend for comfort. And in stead, I found everything that Id ever been looking for my whole life. And now here we are with our future before us and I only want to spend it with you, my prince, my soul mate, my friend. Unless you dont want to. You go!
Chandler: (To Ross) No, thats okay. (Ross nods and retreats.) Monica I thought this was going to be the most difficult thing I ever gonna had to do. But when I saw you walking down that aisle I realized how simple it was. I love you. Any surprises that come our way its okay, because I will always love you. You are the person I was meant to spend the rest of my life with. You wanna know if Im sure? (He leans in and kisses her.)
Joey: You may not kiss the bride. So, I guess by the powers vested in my by the state of New York and the Internet guys, I now pronounce you husband and wife. Oh wait! Do you take each other?
Joey: Yeah you do!
Joey: We good? Yeah? Good? Once again, I pronounce you husband and wife. (To Chandler) Now kiss her again.
Chandler: (To Monica) I love you. And I know about the baby.
{Transcribers Note: There was no trailer for this episode. See you in season 8; which will start this fall.}
Sarah: Thank you so much!
Vince: You made him a candle light dinner in the park?
Joey: Hey don't worry about that! I mean, Ross needs you! And Rachel and I will stay and help anyway we can.
Janice: Oh! Sid is still in his room. I don't allow porn at home so this is like a vacation for him. So did you do it? Did you make your deposit?
Monica: How dirty do you think I am? Im telling you, if you had some candles and some bubbles and some music, you would love it! It would take all of your stress away.
Monica: At least you took me down with you!
RACHEL: Well, you have been in our lives for nearly two months now and we don't really know you. I mean, who is Julie? I mean, what do you like, what don't you like? We wanna hear everything.
Rachel: If you like looking at butts so much why don't you just go look at a mirror?
Chandler: (to Rachel) And you Ross, I believe, if you check Rachels bag you will find a half-eaten box of cookies in there.
Joey: Yeah! How you doin'? Yeah alright!
Monica: It's nice to meet you. Janine...?
Ross: Uh, Joe, have you looked outside?
Monica: Im sorry. Im sorry. I-I should probably leave you girls alone. (She heads for the bedroom.)
Phoebe: Wait, (grabs him) you know what, I got a little story. When I was in Junior High School I went through this period where I thought I was a witch. And there was this guidance counselor who said something to me, that I think will help you a lot. He said okay, 'you're not a witch you're just an average student.' See what I'm saying?
Monica: Hi! Hey, Pete youre back! Hey, check this out. (She starts to skate over to him)
Monica: Come on! Come on, if we have sex again itll double our chances of getting pregnant. Do you think that closets still available?
PHOEBE: Oh, this is so nice. Alright I have to make a speech. I just wanna say that of all the guys that Monica has been with, and that is a lot, I like you the best.
Chandler: All right, theres a nuclear holocaust, Im the last man on Earth. Would you go out with me?
MONICA: If you really want to watch that Serengetti thing, you can.
Joey: Oh no-no, no-no I love living with you. It just seems that if youre gonna have a roommate, yknow it might as well be the father.
Phoebe: I know. Its just yknow usually when youre, when youre done with the pregnant thing, yknow, then you get to do the mom thing. Im gonna be yknow, sitting around in my leather pants, drinking Tequila.
Rachel: Yeah, I-I heard. (Pause, everyone looks at each other, waiting for Rachels reaction.) I think its great! (Hugs Ross.) Ohh, Im so happy for you!
Ross: I told you about my daughter.
Phoebe: Oh well, as long as it is under control, you know, you can't do anything about it, he's already dating her, and she is a nice person, that wouldn't be right.
Mrs. Waltham: Well, if youre on e of Rosss best friends, why arent you here?
Ross: Wait a minute, are you doing that thing where you pretend it didnt go well but it really did go well?
Ross: I'll help you. Yeah, I'll make up a schedule and make sure you stick to it. And plus, it'll give me something to do.
Joey: (To Ross) Ill tell you about it later. Be cool.
Joey: When that guy was robbing us, and I was locked in the entertainment unit for like six hours, you know what I was doing in there all that time? I was thinking about how I let you down!
Monica: Hey, how are you feelin? Any morning sickness?
Ross: Why, why would you open it?
Ross: Well, what do you do?
RACH: Joey, would you slow down? They're not gonna be sold out of papers at one o'clock in the morning.
Ross: I was working late in the library one afternoon. It was just the two of us. She needed some help with her word jumble. And one thing led to another. If you must know, Anita was very gentle and tender. May she rest in peace
Rachel: Yeah, Im not so sure you should be here when he comes up.
Ross: Oh yeah? Have you ever dated anyone who has been divorced three times?
JOEY: I don't know how to tell you this but, uh . . . I think Monica's cheatin' on ya.� I told you shouldn't have married someone so much hotter than you.
Monica: Oh, and the people are so nice. There's this one guy, Geoffrey, he's the Maitre D., Chandler, you will love him. He is without a doubt, the funniest guy I have ever met. (Chandler, who was almost asleep again, sits up straight in bed in an instant and can't believe what he just heard.)
Benjamin: Like I tried to tell you in the interview Ross, this grant is not based on your knowledge of pretty useless trivia.
Rachel: Ross, that girl just spent the entire evening talking to your friends, asking to hear stories about you, looking through Monicas photo albums, I mean you dont do that if youre just in it for two weeks.
Phoebe: Really? Theres nothing sexual about this? (Sexily) Oooh. Oo God! Ohh. Ohhhh. Ohh. (Some cute guy is watching closely.) (To him) What are you looking at?! (Pause) I mean hi.
Donny: Well, welcome to the Winner Circle. Joey and Gene, you guys ready?
Monica: So, if youre parents hadnt got divorced, youd be able to answer a question like a normal person?
Rachel: Thank you. (they walk away)
Charlie: Thank you.
Paula: Honey.. you should always feel the thing. Listen, if that's how you feel about the guy, Monica, dump him!
Ross: Umm, would you like to dance?
Phoebe: (to Monica) Then why are you answering? Do you at least know what route were on?
Ross: Oh yeah? Youre going further down! Downtown!
Rachel: Okay, swear you wont tell, but when Mark left he gave me a key to Joannas office. Do you wanna see the list?
Joey: What? Why not? Rach, who can you not get?
Phoebe: Absolutely! Just fight all your natural instincts and youll be great.
Joey: All right, let's think about this. I mean, there's got to be an explanation. Uh... did you do anything to make her mad?
Rachel: Ok. See you, bye.
Phoebe: That was a test and you just failed.
Ursula: Oh great! (Opens the door.) (Disappointed) Oh, you. Umm, what's up?
Chandler: That's fast math! We could use you in Tulsa.
Phoebe: What are you, what are you doing here?
Phoebe: Hey you guys! Chandler's coming and he says he has, like, this incredible news, so when he gets here, we could all act like, you know...
David: Phoebe, will you marry me?
Theodore: You remember her Michael, she's lovely and... well behaved and... single.
Mary Ellen: I'll stay if you can tell me my name.
Phoebe: I want to, but I just want you to tell me that marriage isn't really that big a deal. You know that I won't, I won't be missing out on anything. That marriage stinks!
Ross: (not paying attention) Yeah, they dont like you.
Phoebe: When she comes out, you hold her nose, Ill blow in her mouth, and the kid will just (makes a popping sound) right out of her.
Joey: Dude, I screwed up, you dont have to turn me in!
Rachel: (gasps) Oh my God! Listen to you talkin about having kids. Oh my Joey. (She goes over and hugs him.) Oh, please dont get married before I do.
Ross: Oh, thank you so much!
Joey: "Warden, in five minutes my pain will be over. But you'll have to live with the knowledge that you sent an honest man to die."
Charlie: You blew them away!
Charlie: You were incredible!
Ross: Okay! Do you wanna tell the story?!
RACHEL: Nothing, I mean, um, it is your first time with her and, you know if the first time doesn't go well, well then that's, that's pretty darn hard to recover from.
Ross: Emily, there is nothing between Rachel and me. Okay? I love you.
Chandler: (sighs) Just one more thing. I was so pissed at you that night that I wanted to get back at you. So I thought, who does Ross like the more than anybody?
Charlie: (walking in) Hey! There you are!
Phoebe: Maybe you need to spice things up a little.
Rachel: (entering carrying a book) Okay! Okay! Listen to what Sean McMahon wrote in my yearbook senior year, "Dear Rach, youre such a good person." Not girl! Person!
Chandler: I'm not playing with you.
Chandler: (to Phoebe) Did you know this about him?
Rachel: I thought you only met him once?
Chandler: Well, I think, I think, Ross already has one. Now, this ones free, right? Because you paid for the first two, so the third ones free.
Monica: How much were you thinking?
Rachel: Well, uh something about having second thoughts about the wedding and did you guys make a mistake breaking up and uh, she wants you to call her.
Frank: You can have it!
Monica: All right Rachel, you sweep behind, Ill pitch it to you, you throw it down field to Phoebe. All right. Break.
Rachel: You know? Forget it!
Janice: Oh please. Every moment is precious. Yknow? Besides, somebody had to ride in that other taxi with the rest of your luggage, and your friends dont really seem to care too much that youre leaving.
Joey: (stands up) No-no-no-no, no! Who, who were you talking about?
Monica: Chandler, youre not fourteen anymore. Okay? Maybe its time that you let that stuff go. If your fathers not at your wedding youre gonna regret it for the rest of your life.
Waiter: Well, I hope, you got some room left.
Mona: So, whatd you tell him?
Air stewardess: (on the answering machine) Miss, I can't let you off the plane.
Joey: (smiling) Will you wear a thong?
Rachel: But that wasn't gonna stop you before!
Janice: No, it isn't, because you won't let that happen. Don't you know it yet? You love me, Chandler Bing.
Chandler: Oh yeah, it was great. You should be a chef.
Chandler: Yeah, well, I guess you don�t need my help Victor Victoria!
Mike: DO YOU?
Mike: Do you?