words in movies
Phoebe: (entering, hurridly) Hey, you guys! Look what I found! Look at this! (She hands Chandler a picture) Thats my Moms writing! Look.
Joey: That youre actually 50?
Monica: (watching a happy couple walk by, arm in arm) Would you look at them. Am I ever gonna find a boyfriend again? I gonna die an old maid.
Chandler: Youre not gonna die an old maid, maybe an old spinster cook.
Monica: You made a joke right? So I laughed.
Monica: Well, no. Youre Chandler. Y'know, Chandler! (hits him on the arm)
Monica: Oh, hey! Oh good, you brought food!
Ross: Yeah? What about ah, that bike messenger you hit?
Monica: Seriously, where did you get the hat?
Rachel: Ohh, thank you.
Rachel: Well excuse me, my fashion-impaired friends, I am here to tell you that hats are back.
Phoebe: (entering) Are you ah, Phoebe Abott?
Phoebe Sr: Youre Erwins daughter?!
Phoebe Sr: Oh gosh, Lily, yes. Of course I remember Lily. I... Then you must be?
Phoebe: (points to herself) Phoebe. (points to her) Phoebe. Phoebe, yeah. She named me after you I guess.
Phoebe Sr: Take it easy--if you want, theres cookies on the counter, or, or--sangria! (jumps up) I can make sangria!
Phoebe: (goes and gets some cookies) Well, so, umm, anyway umm, Ive been, Ive been looking for my Father, and umm, have you heard from him, or seen him?
Phoebe Sr: The three losers. Oh, poor Lily. (Phoebe notices a picture on the fridge, takes it, and puts it in her pocket.) Ohh, y'know I-I heard about what happened, that must have been just terrible for you, losing your mother that way.
Monica: What are you crazy?!
Joey: Come on! When you go away, you-you have to play, its like a law!
Monica: Aww, thank you.
Rachel: Come on, please?! Im boredddd! You let me do it once before.
Joey: Hey, you know what naked card game is never boring?
Monica: Ah no, the other Phoebe, the one you went to go see.
Monica: Well, why would she lie to you?
Phoebe: I dont know, but were having dinner tomorrow night, so I figured, shes gonna tell me then. Y'know maybe she just wanted to give him time to, buy me presents, I dont know! So, youre all bored?
Phoebe: All right, Im gonna close my eyes and point to someone, and you, whoever I point has to come up with something fun for us to do, and we have to do it.
Ross: Okay, (reading the card) Fonzy gives you two thumbs up, collect two cool points. Yeah.
Phoebe: Monica, if you get five cool points, you get to make somebody take off one item of clothing. It hasnt happened yet, but were all very excited.
Joey: Fine. Gang up on me! I got you all right where I want you.
Joey: Actually, y'know its kinda cold, so how about I keep my boxers on, and give you all a peek at the good stuff?
Monica: You painting his toenails?
Monica: Hes totally flirting with you too.
Bonnie: What are you guys doing?!
Chandler: So, you still dont think Im boyfriend material?
Chandler: I saw you checking me out during the game last night.
Monica: You didnt even take off your pants.
Chandler: Yeah, well, lucky for you.
Rachel: Well I assume the ah, happy couple isnt up yet. Did you guys hear them last night?
Bonnie: Hey, what happened to you?
Rachel: Y'know, I gotta tell ya, I just loved your look when you were bald.
Rachel: I mean you definitely should do that.
Bonnie: Yeah, thank you Rachel, you are soo cool.
Bonnie: You wanna touch it?
Ross: Okay. (He gently touches it.) You can feel all the bones in your skull.
Ross: I was having a little chat with ah, Bonnie, and ah, guess what, she-she happened to bring up y'know, who was behind the um, whole head shaving idea, and now, who was it? Oh, thats right, thats right, it was you!
Ross: She said you gave her the razor!
Bonnie: Okay, Ill see you in a bit.
Ross: You can see the moonlight bouncing off her head! What the hell were you thinking?!!
Ross: You dont know?! Rach, you balded my girlfriend!
Rachel: All right! Ross, do you think its easy for me to see you with somebody else?
Ross: Y'know, hey! Youre the one who ended it, remember?
Rachel: Yeah, because I was mad at you, not because I stopped loving you!
Ross: You still love me?
Ross: You still love me.
Ross: Noo, nnnnn. What does this mean? What do you, I mean do you wanna, get back together?
Rachel: Noo! Maybe! I, I dont know. Ross, I still cant forgive you for what you did, I cant, I just, but sometimes when Im with you I just, I feel so...
Chandler: (to Joey) Noo!! I dont care! Im not, Im not gonna playing one-on-one strip poker with you for practice!
Phoebe Sr: What are you doing here?!
Phoebe: Umm, okay, okay, look. I took this picture from your fridge. Okay, because I know that this is my Father. Yeah, this is Frank Buffay and you are standing right there next to him. Now, look I deserve to know where I came from. All right? So if you can help me find my Father then you should! Otherwise, youre just mean! (pause) So, just tell me the truth!
Phoebe Sr: But umm, youre right. I think that a person should know where they come from. Wh-which is why I ah, (pause) ahh, (pause) okay. Im your mother.
Phoebe Sr: Y'know I wanted to tell you yesterday, but I just, I kinda felt all floopy, and...
Joey: Im telling ya, you guys are totally getting back together!
Chandler: Okay, then you gotta back away, all right? You dont need that kindve hurt. Take it from a guy whos never had a long term relationship......
Bonnie: You guys, the waters great. You should really go in.
Joey: So let me get this straight. If you go with Bonnie tonight, youre doing the smart, healthy thing and moving on.
Joey: Right, and you go with Rachel, Bonnies free tonight?
Chandler: Okay! Okay! Let me try it again, youre gonna wanna date this next guy, I swear!
Chandler: Hi! Im Dorf! Youre date for the evening. (Monica walks away in disgust) Oh come on! Dorf on dating, thats good stuff!!
Joey: (stomps on the footrest which pops Ross up into a sitting position) The trail from the woman you did it with to the woman you hope never finds out who did it! (slapping his hands with each word) You always have to think about the trail!
Joey: Come on Pheebs! I cant take this anymore! Let-let me make it up to you. Huh? (Starts singing.) Ground control to Major Tom. Commencing countdown, engines on. Take your protein pills and put your helmet on!
BIG BULLY: Of course we're hitting faces, why wouldn't you hit faces?
Joey: Uh, if I may? Umm-umm look, Cliff, you told me a lot of personal stuff about you, right? And maybe-maybe it would if-if would help if-if you knew some personal stuff about her. Uh, she was married to a gay ice dancer. Uh, she gave birth to her brothers triplets. Oh! Oh! Her-her twin sister used to do porn!
Girl: Youre a big scrud.
Rachel: Nothing! Phoebe kinda made a mistake. But yknow you do wear that sweater a lot, are you involved in some kind of dare?
Rachel: Jill this is not about me being jealous of you! This is about you being a brat! Wanting what you cant have!
Monica: Oh, you really want to talk about getting people to like you huh, funny man? (Joey laughs but stops when Chandler turns to glare at him.)
Monica: (noticing Rachel crawling behind the couch) Rach? What are you doing?
Phoebe: No but, why does that have to be a bad thing. Just change what it means. Y'know? Go down there and prove your Mother wrong. Finish the job you were hired to do, and well call that pulling a Monica.
Joey: All right, look, you got to help me out, ok? Look, I have the magic marker, I want you to fill in the skinny one soI don�t look stupid for my pictures.
Joey/Drake: Yes, you do.Yes...you do. I'm the one who doesn't have a choice because I...because I can't stop loving you.
Rachel: What?! I didn't have a good time in Greece! Ross abandoned me! Okay, I couldn't get a plane out, so I had to stay in their honeymoon suite with people coming up to me all the time going, "Oh, Mrs. Geller, why are you crying?" I mean, it was sooo humiliating. I felt like such an idiot! I mean, it's all my fault! And you know why, because I make very bad decisions.
Charlie: There's an indoor pool, you can swim there! (Ross agrees)
Chandler: You roll another hard eight and we get married here tonight.
Judge: You need to get out of my chambers.
Phoebe: Oh, this is so exciting! You get your picture back up on the wall of fame! Eek!
Amy: You didn't want me to marry the old guy with the great apartment. Then, I tried to help your daughter to de-emphasize her flaws (frantically pointing at her nose) And suddenly I am the bad guy?
Ross: (Angry) I- I- I ca- I can't believe this. I mean, all I asked you to do was keep him in the apartment.
Bank Officer: Okay, Ms. Lambert handles all our closures. (to a beautiful woman) Would you come over here please?
Frank Jr.: You just don't know how hard it is, Phoebe. There's just so many of them. You know, two I can handle. Two's great. You just hold one in each hand, but what do I do when the third one runs at me with his bike helmet on. I've got no more hands to protect my area! There's three of them, Phoebe, three!
Joey: Youre right. Youre right. I-Ill go tell her now before Ross finds out and Ill be gentle. I can do that. I am a gentle person. Oh, by the way. Two people screwing in there (Points to the closet Chandler and Monica were in) if you want to check that out.
Chandler: You do know that Wham broke up?
Monica: Right. Umm, listen since were-we-re on that subject, umm, I just wanted to tell you that uh, well, I-I was going through a really hard time in London, what with my brother getting married and that guy thinking I was Rosss mother
Monica: Are we playing football or what? Come on you hairy-backed Marries.
Chandler: Ah, the "I'm sorry I rejected you" phone call. I'm not used to getting it from guys. (on the phone, getting up from the sofa) Hey, Steve.
Janice: A little birdie told me something about you wanting to rip your arm off and throw it at me.
Ross: I dunno, maybe its because youre really sarcastic. Or maybe its cause you uh-
Ross: So honey, this morning was fun, huh? Me hopping in on you in the shower there.
CHANDLER: I am here, on my knees, holding up these couch cushions as a symbol of my sorrow and regret, much like they did in biblical times. Though you may haveth anger now. . . [Joey returns to his room]
PHOEBE: I'm sorry, Monica, I'm really happy you got promoted, but cold cucumber mush for thirty-something bucks? No! Rachel just had that, that, that salad, and, and Joey with his like teeny pizza! It's just...
Ross: Yeah, yeah, I was watching. (The instructor just nods and walks away.) Umm, hey, a couple of questions though. Umm, about that-that-that last move where the woman tripped you and then pinned you to the floor, what-what-what-what would you do next?
Joey: Hey, did you get to the part where theyre trapped in the car and Cujos throwin himself at the windshield?
Joey: Thats right! I helped you guys out a lot in the start of your relationship. Huh? I helped you guys sneak around for like six months, and I looked like an idiot! And I was humiliated. And I only made 200 dollars!
Chandler: Well, I think it's great that you're going on a date, you know? I mean, it sounds healthy. I mean, you have needs. Embrace your womanhood!
Cailin: Ill join you.
Phoebe: So, here you are. It seems like yesterday I was talking to you in that little petri dish. Everyone said labor was the hardest thing I'd ever have to do, but they were wrong this is. Oh, I had the most fun with you guys! I wish I could take you home and see you everyday. Okay, I'll settle for being your favorite Aunt. I know Alice's sister has a pool, but you lived in me. Okay, so we're cool. Yeah, we're gonna be great. Little high fives! (Imitates the high fives.) Ahh! Ahh! Ahh! (One of the babies begins to cry.) Well, if you're gonna cry. (She starts crying.)
Monica: Hey Rach, the adoption agency needs letters of recommendation and we were wondering if you would write one for us.
Chandler: I am sorry I am late. You�ll understand when you�ll see Joey.
Phoebe: You just did it again. Chandler, your feelings for Chandler are certainly gone!
Ross: This is fun. Hey Rach, remember that whole "We were on a break thing?" Well, I'm sorry, will you marry me? (Laughs--whines as he sees that no one is laughing. They're just staring at him in shock.)
Jennifer: Thank you Conan!
Chandler: Really?! That's what you heard? (To Monica) You said that?
RACHEL: Well, you know, honey, I don't think everybody gets Smelly Cat. You know, I mean, if all you've ever actually had are healthy pets, then, whoosh!
PHOEBE: Yeah, eight of them. That's 56 to him. You know also, if, if it's raining, you can't let him look up too long 'cause that cone'll fill up really really fast.
AMGER: I love you Drake.
Monica: Yes. Well I got his machine and I left a message. But it's okay, it's okay, it's okay, because you know it was like a casual, breezy message. It was breezy! Oh God, what if it wasn't breezy?
Ross: Okay umm, why dont we all take a seat, yknow? And uh, and Ill get us all some uh some coffees(He goes to pull out Elizabeths chair, but Paul steps in)Yeah, why dont you. (Paul pulls out her chair) Uh and you guys can talk about whatever, whatever you want. Yknow? Whatever pops into your head. (He turns his back to Paul and Elizabeth and points to himself for Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe. Then he goes to order the coffee.)
Phoebe: No. No, I wont. But I should tell you this, this exact same thing happened to my roommate Denise. She moved in with a guy who was secretly married to her and he said he didnt love her, but he really did, and it just blew up! And thats how she ended up living with me! (Ross looks at her.) (Pause) Okay, thats a lie.
Chandler: Im saying that she is a devil woman! Yknow I mean you think you know someone and then they turn around and they sleep with Nick! Nick, with his rock hard pecs, and his giant man-nipples! I hate him, I hate her! Well, I dont hate her, I love her. This is all my fault really.
Phoebe: No, we were just laughing. You know, how laughter can be infectious.
Joey: (interrupting) Whoa-whoa! No-no-no-no-no, nothing is going up! Okay? Up, up is not an optionwhat's a urethra? (Monica whispers what it is in his ear.) Are you crazy?!
Rachel: No, yknow what? Its gonna be okay. I mean you dont have to have this rustic Italian feast. Yknow? And-and you dont need, you dont need this custom-made, empire waisted, duchess, satin gown; you can wear off the rack. (She starts to cry, as does Monica.)
Phoebe: Okay, so maybe you dont get her a ring. Maybe you-maybe you do something different. Yknow? Maybe you get her an engagement bracelet, yknow? Or an engagement tiara? Orooh! An engagement Revolutionary War musket! (Picks one up from the display in the corner.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, its just Monica and Chandler dancing to Wonderful Tonight on the Slowhand album by Eric Clapton. And you can buy that album from the CFSI, just click on the CDNow link.]
Monica: Why would the little girl creep you out?
JOEY: Pretty good. It's like you said. It's mostly just putting numbers from one column into another column.
Joey: So, you know I'm filling in for Phoebe's step dad, tomorrow, right?
Rachel: Yeah, it's a real shame you can't make it to that one-woman show tonight.
Rachel: Well, you know what? This is great. Finally, I have someone I can pass on my wisdom too. Let me tell you about a couple of things I learned while working at the coffeehouse. First of all, the customer is always right. (Joey nods.) A smile goes a long way. (Joey smiles) And if anyone is ever rude to you? Sneeze muffin.
Monica: Yeah. I think you have to draw him out. And then- when you do- he's a preppy animal.
Ross: Hey Joe did Did you ever have a threesome?
Chandler: Janice! There you are! There you are! I had to have one last kiss, and also-also you said that you were going to leave right after I got on the plane!
Rachel: All right, look, heres the bottom line Ross, this is fixable, if we act fast, okay. So, Ill invite him to brunch tomorrow and you can make nice.
Phoebe: Ooh, you nailed the Old Lady! (They both laugh at what she said.)
Joey: Hi Alex! (to the director) And uh, as you can see my hands are not in my pants. (Holds them both up.)
Rachel: (taking off her sweater) Okay umm, Ross? I'm-I'm really warm, so I'm going to be taking off my sweater. Now, I'm just letting you know that this is not an invitation to the physical act of love.
Monica: Now see, this way you protect the plate.. and lets face it you have fun.
Rachel: Hey! How's it going? Did you make any new friends?
CHANDLER: Sorry, you had a paleontologist on your face. But, uh, it's gone now, you're alright.
Joey: (Whispering.) Pisst, Monica. Alright, we really need to start looking out for Rachel. Ill cover the front door. You watch that big hole at the back of the building and I got Chandler covering Ross.
Ross: (on the phone) Hi, this is Ross Geller in suite 206. It seems you forgot a couple of things. Could you have some complimentary toiletries sent up to my room? (pause) Thank you! Ok. Toothbrush, toothpaste, razor, mouthwash, deodorant, dental floss, band aids, shaving cream, after shave... and I feel like I am forgetting something... Is there anything else you have that I haven't asked for already? (pause) Yeah, go ahead, send up some tampons.
Joey: No-no-no, please-please Chandler I-I-I would owe you so much!
RTST: No, ma'am. Well, anyhoo, we should be getting our F.D.A. approval any day now, hopefully, in time for Thanksgiving. See, the way we look at it, chocolate already dominates most of your major food-preparation holidays: Easter, Christmas, what have you.
Ross: Well I, close your eyes, I just think youre gonna like this a little better, cause, close-close... (He gets some more on the brush)
Rachel: Hey! You guys umm, I want you to meet Sebastian.
Chandler: You mean like for award shows?
Rachel: Phoebe, dont you think youve had enough to drink?
Rachel: Okay. Oh wait, wait-wait, youre not gonna come with me?
Phoebe: All right. Ok, but, but! You have to promise that you will not be all like control-y and bossy and Monica about it.
Chandler: Did you make it, or are you just serving it?
Phoebe: Oh, no umm, hi, that-that, you have to put that out, cause Im pregnant.
Rachel: How do you think this suit would look on an assistant buyer at Bloomingdales?
Ginger: Its okay if it bothers you. Really. I mean the only thing I need to know is: How much it bothers you? because I dont like wasting my time. Am I wasting my time?
Mrs. Bing: No. Because I know how to write men that women fall in love with. Believe me, I cannot sell a Paolo. People will not turn three hundred twenty-five pages for a Paolo. C'mon, the guy's a secondary character, a, y'know, complication you eventually kill off.
Monica: You gave her food poisoning!?
Chandler: Sorry, I just cant sleep. Ooh! (Turns on the light and Monica groans.) Where is that book that you are reading with the two women who were ice-skating and wearing, wearing those hats with the flowers on it? Because every time I look at that cover Im like (Fake snores.)
Amy: Uh.. To name a few. You know.. You know.. You've just always been like this. You just have to have everything. And I couldn't have anything. Like in junior high, when you stole Timmy from me. I mean, do you even realize how much that hurt me?
Max: No. Have you seen David?
PHOEBE: Right. My name was on there, but now it just says "carrot cake". So, um, so um, how many chords do you know?
PHOEBE: Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. Ugly Naked Guy is decorating his tree. Oh my God, you should see the size of his Christmas Balls.
MONICA: Ok people, I want you to take a piece of paper, here you go, and write down your most embarassing memory. Oh, and I do ask that when you're not using the markers, you put the caps back on them because they will dry out.
Joey: (taking apart the invitation) Hey, pretty smart! Tissue paper! Youre at the wedding, you have to cry, "Handkerchief?" "No-no, I got my invitation."
Ross: Rach, c�mon, Emma is fine. You�re turning into an obsessive mother. Okay, you need to stop.
Gunther: Youve sung Happy Birthday to 20 different women today!
PHOEBE: Are you the cutest?
Ursula: Yeah, I can talk them into giving you like, 30 dollars.
Chandler: Im not great at the advice, can I interest you in a sarcastic comment? Some cheese?
Michelle: It�s so amazing I met you the same day that Eric broke up with me, because it�s like you lose a boyfriend,you get a boyfriend.
Rachel: Be-because I didn't want him to think I was stupid! I mean, that was really embarrassing what happened to you!