words in movies
Ross: How weird is that? Yknow? Youre moving in with me and have the one thing I dont have. Its like uh, in a way you-you complete me (Phoebe glares at him) kitchen.
Ross: (in an Australian accent) You complete me kitchen, matey!
Phoebe: Ross, I know what youre thinking.
Phoebe: That shes gonna move in with you and maybe then shell fall in love with you and then when she finds out youre already married, shell just be happy. Yknow? Youre just, youre very sad.
Ross: Oh my God! I-I see what this is! You are in love with Rachel!
Ross: Of course! It all adds up! I mean you youre obsessed with her. Its always, "Ross, what are you gonna do about Rachel?" "Ross, why-why are you moving in with Rachel?" "When are you gonna confess your secret marriage to Rachel?" You want her!
Monica: (under her breath) That youre a liar. (Hides the candlesticks in a drawer.)
Ross: (on phone) No-no-no, thats great! Ill be there Monday. And thank you again! (Listens) Okay. (Hangs up) (To All) Umm, that was the head of the Paleontology department at N uh, Y, uh U!
Phoebe: Oh! Yeah, yknow you and Ross are still married.
Phoebe: Well, you know that psychic I see?
Phoebe: Yeah, and I know you guys dont know a lot about psychic readings, but that one is pretty much the worse one you can get.
Joey: I cant believe she would say that too you.
Rachel: Yeah honey you dont believe her do you?
Chandler: Just out of curiosity did she tell you how youre gonna go?
Ross: Hey uh, well, todays my first lecture and I kinda wanted to try it out on you guys, do you, do you mind?
Chandler: Why dont you open with a joke?
Chandler: Wait a minute, hold the phone! Youre not talking about Chuckles University?!
Rachel: Ross, hey you know what might make it less boring?
Ross: Thank you!
Ross: I-I-I dont even know why I bother to talk to you guys about it. Yknow what? Im just gonna do it on my own with no naked chicks.
Chandler: Yes, you got something from the Screen Actors Guild.
Joey: Ooh, its probably a residual check, hey can you open it for me, Im kinda .
Chandler: Okay, its not a check. Theyre saying your health insurance expired because, you didnt work enough last year.
Chandler: Okay, make sure you look both ways before you cross the street.
Joey: (mocks him, in a whiney voice) look both ways before you cross the street. (Turns and walks headlong into the closed door.)
Rachel: Hey Pheebs, youre still alive! How are you doing?
Phoebe: Ugh, its so exhausting waiting for death. Ohh, by the way, do you think you could(Groans, hacks, and then freezes with her eyes open and her tongue hanging out.)
Rachel: Pheebs, what-what are you doing?
Phoebe: I was preparing you for mydidnt you think I was dead? Did that not come off?
Rachel: Oh yeah, scared the hell out of me. I thought wed lost you forever. Pheebs, you lie down?
Phoebe: Yeah, thanks. And listen, can you do me a favor? Could you just umm, wake me up in a couple hours, yknow if you can.
Rachel: Did-did you take these back?
Ross: I knew all I had to do was let the material speak for itself. Everyones all, "Ross you have to be funny and sexy." Well, I proved them wrong! And now, Im gonna pass the news onto Joey and Chandler.
Monica: That youre not funny or sexy?
Estelle: Well! Well! Well! Joey Tribbiani! So you came back huh? They think they can do better but they all come crawling back to Estelle!
Joey: What are you talkin about? I never left you! Youve always been my agent!
Joey: Estelle, you gotta get me some work. I-I lost my health insurance.
Estelle: Well, I think uhh, someone out there may have been bad mouthing you all over town.
Chandler: Thats great, but shouldnt you be on the toilet right now?
Chandler: Whats wrong with you?
Chandler: This sounds like a hernia. You have toyou-you go to the doctor!
Joey: Why did I have to start working out again? (Looks at the weights he was using.) Damn you 15s!
Monica: What the hell are you doing?!
Ross: Look, I was nervous! You guys had me all worried I was going to be boring! I got up there and they were all like staring at me. I opened my mouth and this British accent just came out.
Ross: Will you-will you please?
The Professor: Do you have a moment to talk about your lecture?
Ross: (in accent) Right, will you excuse us for one moment? (Takes Monica aside.) (In his normal voice.) What are you doing?
Monica: (normal voice) Oh, you can have an accent and I cant?! (To an exiting student in accent.) Top O the morning to ya laddies!
Chandler: Hey, will you grab me a cruller? (Joey starts to groan and get up.) Sit down! Will you go to the hospital?!
Chandler: I will loan you the money. Just go to the hospital and lets just get that thing pushed back in.
Joey: Thank you, but it would take me forever to pay you that money back and I dont want that hanging over my head. Okay? Besides, as soon as my insurance kicks in I can get all the free operations I want! Yeah, Im thinking Ill probably start with that laser eye surgery too.
Joey: Look, Im telling you if I put my hand on my stomach right here (He puts his hand down his pants, like Al Bundy on Married With Children always used to do.) it doesnt hurt that bad.
Phoebe: Hey! Maybe youll die!
Monica: You stole them from me!
Rachel: You stole them from me!!
Monica: You just wanna each take one?
Monica: Why dont you phase it out? Yeah, fade the accent out and people will think youre, yknow, that youre adjusting to life in America.
Rachel: Of course theyre listening to you! Everybody listens to you.
Ross: Monica you really think I should try this phasing out thing?
Monica: I think you look fine.
Casting Director #1: Whenever youre ready.
Joey: (in a gravely, painful voice) Okay. "Hey, Timmy, Ive got a surprise for you."
Casting Director #1: Hold it. Im sorry, the surprise is a new swing set, if you could play it a little less intense?
Joey: Oh yeah, sure, no problem, Ill justhold on one second. (He turns around and puts his hand in his pants and groans in relief.) (In a relaxed voice.) "Hey Timmy, Ive got a surprise for you!"
Casting Director #2: Thats where you pick up the bag.
Casting Director #2: No, the line is pick a bag, so you need to pick up the bag.
Casting Director #3: You mean dying man?
Rachel: Okay! (Picks up the phone and starts dialing.) (In an Irish accent) "Hello Ross, this is Dr. McNeeley from the Fake Accent University, wed like you to come on board with us full time! (Hangs up.)
Rachel: Really?! How do you know?
Chandler: Listen, Im really glad you got the part.
Joey: (barely audible through the pain) Thank you.
Chandler: But are you sure you can do this?
Joey: Hi Alex! (to the director) And uh, as you can see my hands are not in my pants. (Holds them both up.)
The Director: Cut! Alex, remember youre supposed to cry. Can you cry for us this time?
The Director: All right! Lets try this again! You ready Joe?
Joey: Ah, just one thing umm, is it all right with you if I, if I scream right up until you say action?
Chandler: Im sorry! Hey-hey Joe, why dont you uh, lift up your shirt? (He does.) Take a look at this kiddo. (Alex finally starts crying.) We have a crying child! Roll the damn cameras!
Ross: (British) Come again? Whats-whats this nonsense? (Giggles.) (American.) All right, Im-Im not English. Im from Long Island. I was really nervous and the accent just uh, just came out. Im sorry. So, if we could just get back to the lecture. Umm, were there any questions? (Everyone raises their hands) About paleontology. (They all put their hands down.) All right, look I was just trying to make a good first impression. Obviously, I screwed up. But what you guys think of me is really important because Im-Im hoping to get a permanent job here. So if you just give me another chance to make a good impression
Rachel: Ross!! Are you crazy?! I am still your wife!! What, were you just never gonna tell me?!! What the hell is wrong with you?!!!! Ugh, I could just kill you!!!!
Phoebe: Have you really done this before?
Joey: Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! You just take a big, big swing. Now, dont hold back. (He dons his protective helmet (Why, I have no clue.) and Phoebe picks up a wooden baseball bat and starts to swing as Chandler and Monica enter.)
Chandler: What are you doing?
Phoebe: Yes, but I wanted you to want to live with me, but okay, if you're having so much fun over here
Chandler: Hey! Well, Ive been preparing for that my entire life! Or something about you thats mean!
Chandler: You think?
Monica: (gives her an envelope) Would you just open it?
Rachel: Would you excuse me for a second?
ROSS: How can you not believe in evolution?
Rachel: Look, I am so so happy for you guys, but you getting married just reminds me of the fact that Im not. Im not even close. And I dont know, maybe I just wanted to make myself feel better. And I know that thats dumb, but oh my God you were so depressed when Ross got married that you slept with Chandler!
Joey: Well, this is awkward. {See? I told you so.}
Phoebe: So how are things going with you?
Rachel: I cannot believe that after ten years, you do not know ONE thing about me.
Ross: Of course he is! What, do you think Id just use my son as-as an excuse? What kind of father do you think I am?
Joey: Thank you so much.
Phoebe: You sound like a guy.
Joey: Probably not. Nah. I don't know how much I'm gonna wanna play after you go.
Ross: Yknow what? I dont like you without mom. (To Joey) Come on. (Walks away.)
Phoebe: Oh yes. Yes. Yeahno. She did. She left you umm, (looking in her purse) this lipstick.
Phoebe: (yelling back) I miss you too!!!! (He walks away.)
Rachel: Yeah, you do.
Rachel: Yeah! You-you got the job! Youre my new assistant!
Mrs. Verhoeven's Daughter: You speak Dutch? (In Dutch) Zeer vereerd een vriend van mijn moeder te ontmoeten. (Translation: Im very honored to meet a friend of my mother.)
Joey: Oh really? Well, maybe you and I go out for drinks? (Pause) Youre the other one right? (She thinks about it for a second and nods yes.)
CHANDLER: But hey, it's courtside.� The cheerleaders are going to be right in fr. . . (Pause)� That's not the way to convince you.
Rachel: Because it took us months to find a good nanny and I wouldn't want anything to, you know, drive her away.
Rachel: You wanna go in the bedroom? Its a little more comfortable.
Joey: Umm, listen, Ross do you really think this moving in with Rachel is a good idea?
Ross: (talking agitated and angry) Everyone gets a goodbye but me? What have I got to do to get a goodbye, huh? Be best friends with you? Uh, go out with you? Have a baby with you? Oh wait a minute, wait a minute, I did all those things.
Joey: Pheebs! There you are!
Phoebe: Well, I didn't get embarrassed running next to Miss (panting). But no, okay. No, no, I can see why running with me would be embarrassing to you. Yeah, okay. You're uptight.
Ross: (shocked) (To Rachel) How did you know that?!!!!
Monica: Thank you. So what does this Bob guy look like? Is he tall? Short?
Phoebe: Ok, you weren't there.
Joey: Im so sorry. Look, if it was up to me you would never leave the show.
Rachel: But Pheebs, yknow you earned it.
Janice: What are you doing here?
Rachel: But I told you, I didnt have the time!
Phoebe: You don't need Janice for that, you've got us. We
Rachel: Ahhh, I think you look great! That bag is gonna get you that part.
Monica: Couldn't you just stay like this forever? (His eyes snap open.) Chandler! Couldn't you just stay here forever?
Ross: Smooth man. Yeah, you got some chilie on your neck. (Chandler checks and runs into the bathroom.) Well, I just want to say, thanks everyone, this-this was great. And hey! See you guys Monday morning. (They museum geeks wave at him.) Thanks Joey.
Janice: Are you being British?!
Rachel: You have! Ross, you should give yourself credit. I mean my Mom never thought this would work out. It was all, Once a cheater, always a cheater.
[Eddie leaves the room and Chandler mouths "Thank you" to himself]
Monica: And youve never been funnier. Joke, joke, joke, you were a hoot!
Ross: So, are you gonna see him again?
Ross: Yes. Yes. Yes! Yes, I really do! In fact, it's funny, very often, someone who you wouldn't think could-could curl your toes, might just be the one who...
Joey: Oh hey but, before you guys do that (To Rachel) I need to talk to you, and Ross, I need to talk to you.
Ross: Ive got to say; I know I divorce a lot of women, never thought I would be divorcing you.
Rachel: I mean, didn't you think you were just gonna meet somone, fall in love- and that'd be it? (Ross gazes at her.) ..Ross?
Phoebe: It was really sweet. The last thing she said to me was; "Okay dear, you go get the eggs and I'm gonna get the yogurt and we'll meet at the checkout counter." And y'know what? We will meet at the checkout counter.
Chandler and Rachel: You think?!
Chandler: Were you just ten seconds later!
Doctor: I can't believe you didn't know it's twins! This has never happened before.
Ross: What are you talking about?
Monica: '....Won't you, won't you, won't you.... '
Phoebe: (overacting badly) I cant! My circuits are fried! Theyre fried I tell you!!
Ross: And you know I wanted to ask Charlie out since the day I met her.
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Listen umm, yeah okay, I need to talk to you!
Joey: (squinting his eyes) Are you kiddin'? I think I just saw a bat in the corner!
Chandler: Okay y'know what, because you said that, I'm not putting out tonight.
Chandler: Oh! Thanks, I'm crazy about our place. Hey! speaking of crazy... do you have a history of mental illness in the family?
Chandler: So, you don't think I'm terminal?
Rachel: (on the phone) Monica, Im quitting! I just helped an 81 year old woman put on a thong and she didnt even buy it! (Pause) Im telling you Im quitting! Thats it! Im talking to my boss right now! (Pause) Yes I am! (Pause) Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Okay bye, call me when you get this message. (Hangs up as her boss, Mr. Waltham, walks in.) Oh! Mr. Waltham, I ah really need to talk to you.
Rachel: Hi. Thanks for the party, honey. Should I help you clean up?
Chandler: Do you think that theres a town in Missouri or some place called Sample? And ah, as youre driving into town theres-theres like a sign, and it says Youre in Sample. (He says it like urine sample.)
CHANDLER: Ahhhh-gaaaahhh. Eddie what're you still doin' here?
Phoebe: As a masseuse and a human, I'm begging you, never do that to anyone!
Joey: What do you mean? Rach, don't I seem like a professor you'd buy some kind of e-crap from?
PHOEBE: Yeah, I see what you mean.� By the way, nice Ross imitation.
Chandler: Hey, you have nothing but talk about her for the last 48 hours! If you were in a school yard youd be pulling her pigtails and pushing her down now!
Rachel: Wait a minute! (To Monica) You let Ross drive the Porsche and when I ask you, you say youre the only one whos allowed to drive it.
Mike: oh it's just you have that look (shuts the front door)
Frank: How are you?
Joey: Well, right after I did that sex study down at NYU. (to Chandler) Hey, Remember that sweater I gave you for your birthday?
Ross: Thank you.
Joey: (smiling) Now let's not ruin this day. You worked so hard. Let's move past this and try to have a nice meal all together, huh?
Jill: Oh great! Thanks Ross, youre such a good friend!
Joanna: Would you? Or, is it just to sad and desperate, and y'know something that Sophie would do?
Phoebe: But are you saying that you would move out if I didnt buy that lamp?
Ross: Hey, what are you doing shopping at eight in the morning?
Joey: And the best part is, we're filming in the desert outside Vegas! (To Chandler) And you know what that means buddy!
Joey: But youre still moving in together, right? Because my ad came out today. (Shows him the paper.)
Phoebe: Oh, theres a cab! Taxi!! (The cab stops and she opens the door.) Good timing, my God, huh? Here you go. (Pushes Rachel in and closes the door.)
Ross: Oh-oh-okay, but-but I know, that even though I've been a-a complete idiot up 'til now, I mean, I mean you-you-you have to come here. You have to come here so we can work this out.
Monica: Have I read it? (pause) No, are you enjoying it?
Joey: (to Kate) Ah, are you okay?
Monica: If you want, I'll do it.
Ross: (following them into the kitchen) What are you guys doing?
Rachel: Oh okay, hey guys, would you flip mine too?
Monica: Are you trying to tell me that were moving to Oklahoma, or that youre gay? All right, not that this matters, but did they at least offer you a huge raise?
Joey: You know, ah, Ive been thinking about this and I gotta tell ya, its not my fault. Its a natural instinct.
Joey: If you didnt want to play, why did you come to the party?
Monica: I just asked you.
Joey: What? What the hell am I doing? You just broke my fridge!
Devon: So good then! Well see you at Riverside Park at 2:00! Cheers!
Ross: Look, I just think you're an adult, okay? And you should get over your silly fears.
EDDIE: You, you want, you want me to move out?
Ross: (he picks up the ball) What do you think you learnt how to do in the last two minutes?? (he enters another room)
Rachel: How... wha... Hey! What are you... What is this? Have you guys been listening this entire time?
Monica: See ya.... Waitwait, what's with you?
Matt: Sometimes the dialogue itself is just so funny and youllwell be rehearsing during the week and you justwhatever-whatever the joke is; its so funny we cant get through it in rehearsal and just