words in movies
Rachel to Emma: Oh Emma. This is going to be your first Thanksgiving. What are you thankful for? Mommy's bobbies.
Woman at door: It's your favorite sister.
Rachel: Oh.. yeah? Well unless you pushed a desk out of your vagina, <shakes head no> not the same thing.
Amy: No, I'm not talking about you. <to Rachel> It was your fat friends brother with that bad afro, do you remember?
Monica: well no offense honey, but your taste is a little feminine for me.
Joey: Somebody opened the door to the coffee house and a raccoon came running in, went straight for your muffin and I said "Hey don't eat that-that's Phoebe's" and he said.. <pause> He said.. "Joey you stink at lying." What am I going to do?
Amy with straight hair: Oh she's precious. Do you ever worry she's going to get your real nose?
Rachel: Oh sure Ross, yeah. If I have a heart attack in a restaurant, I want you there with your fossil brush.
Monica to Amy: So. Welcome. Is this your first time you're seeing Emma?
Amy: I don't believe this, hold on a second. You guys die and I don't get your baby?
Chandler: You know, guys I got to say. This means so much to me. That you would trust me with your child. I mean, we all know that Monica and I have been trying to have a baby of our own. You know I've had my doubts about my skills as a father, but that you two.. that you two.... <starts to cry>
Amy: Its such a slap in the face. I'm your sister and you would give your baby to these strangers over me.
Phoebe: There's your movie! <claps>
Chandler: Oh yeah, well can you picture me saying "Go to your room! You're grounded"?
Rachel: Jealous of what? Of your lack of responsiblity? You, your immaturity? Your total disregard of other people's feelings?
Amy: You bitch. You just think you're so perfect. With your new baby and your, your small apartment. <directs this to Ross who in turns throws the towel in his hand down on the table> Well let me tell you something. Your baby isn't even that cute.
Joey: What? Are you out of your mind? Lets throw some jello on them.
Chandler: Alright! That is it. This is our apartment and you can not behave this way. Now if you can't act your age then you shouldn't be here at all. Now those plates may not be as nice as the pretty pink ones I picked out, but they're very important to Monica. I want you to apologize to her right now.
Nina: Your... excuse me?
Cashier: (looking at the completed address card) Oh, I love your neighborhood. Theres a great gym right around the corner from your building.
Joey: Whoa-whoa-whoa! Before you start handing out wedding rings and planning bachelor parties, dont you have to decide who your best man is gonna be?
Joey: Oh no no no no no... It wasn't... It wasn't because of your money problems, it was for something for her.
Joey: Hey, can I ask you something? In this, in this picture of you and your wife, is your wife Rachel?
Chandler: So in your whole life, you've only been with one(He gets a look too)oh.
PHOEBE: Why don't you play with your roommate?
Rachel: Monica, you should totally put your name down on the list
Joey: What's a matter Ross? What you're nervous about your speech?
Mr. Geller: Eat your fish.
Joey: That kinda sounds like your dream dude.
Wayne: Joey, Joey, I-I-Ill g-get you your job back if you help me out.
Frank Sr.: Yes. Yes it is. I burned the formula and I put your diapers on backwards. I mean, I made up a song to sing you to sleep, but that made you cry even more!
The Interviewer: So it seems like you have a lot of friends, who would you say is your best friend?
Monica: I still say that if we had called your dad we coulda gotten better seats.
ROSS: You know what, this is ridiculous, ok. This is your birthday, this is your party. I say we just put 'em all together and if they can't deal with it, who cares.
Chandler: Oh God, it freaked me out. Okay, I know it shouldnt have, but it did. I mean I like her, I dont want to stop seeing her, but every so often its like Hey, y'know what, wheres your leg? I mean Im the smallest person in the world arent I? Im the smallest person in the world.
Rachel: No. No, no, I'm not ready! How can I be ready? "Hey, Rach! You ready to jump out the airplane without your parachute?" Come on, I can't do this!
Chandler: Why would I kiss a girl, and then put her on your bed?
Phoebe: (reading): Your Visa bill is huge!
Joey: C'mon, she's your mom!
Joey: Yeah! Well, now that you brought it up, our fridge is broken. We have to get a new one. Now, I checked around and your half is $400. Thanks a lot.
Monica: Maybe this wasn't your shot.
Phoebe's Assistant: We've got a couple changes in your schedule. Your 4:00 herbal massage has been pushed back to 4:30 and Miss Somerfield canceled her 5:30 shiatsu.
Ross: Yeah I know. (Pause) On the other hand in um, in about seven months youre gonna have something that youre gonna love more than any guy youve ever gone out with. Just wait. Wait until uh, wait until the first time your baby grabs your finger. You have no idea.
Joey: Did you get your money back?
Chandler: Sure, and Joey; do not let Ross look at any of the maps or the globe in your apartment.
Amy: You didn't want me to marry the old guy with the great apartment. Then, I tried to help your daughter to de-emphasize her flaws (frantically pointing at her nose) And suddenly I am the bad guy?
Rachel: I think shes checking out your beehive Ross.
Joey: What? Are you referring to my man's bag? At first, I thought it just looked good, but it's practical too. Check it out! It's got compartments for all your stuff! Your wallet! Your keys! Your address book!
Phoebe: Well hello, Mrs. Penella! Thank you so much for coming! Well, okay look, here's your umm, 3-D glasses and Reverend Pong will tell you when to put them on.
Amanda: (noticing the bottle of wine he has) Oh, I don't mean to be a square, but I'd really appreciate it if you wait and drink your wine after the kids are asleep? Oh uh, thanks for this, I hope I can do the same for you sometime. (She leaves)
Joey: So Pheebs, where are you doing all, your bell ringing?
Joey: (to Monica) Can I use your phone? (On phone) Yeah, the number for a Sidney Marks, please.
Rachel: Oh, Ross, c'mon. It's my fault, I almost lost your...
Ross: I see... Thanks very much. (he gets up and walks to the door. On his way out he looks at the photographs Mr Zelner has near his door. He picks one up.) Is this your son?
Phoebe: Probably? Yeah, I don't like that word. (Chandler and Monica look surprised) Kind of what probably really means. Yeah, uh-huh. Yeah, oh, "Your mom probably won't kill herself," yknow? I'm sorry, but I'm not hanging all my hopes of Rachel and I living together on-on "Probably!" Yknow? You gotta take care of yourselves! (She starts to walk out) In this world history teaches us nothing! (Exits)
Monica: No, there is no way! It can not be Ross! (She looks through the window and sees Ross practicing and fumbling around with the pipes.) Unbelievable! Why is your family Scottish?!
Monica: Well, spring vacation is doing nice things with your grandparents. Spring break youre doing frat guys.
Joey: Maybe she never got your message.
Monica: Oh umm, how about your mom dying, or having to live on the streets when you were 14?
Woman No. 1: Just a sec. (To Chandler and Joey) Hope you find your monkey. (She starts to shut the door)
Monica: No Joey! Chandler could be your assistant! See, he could answer all of your fan mail and stuff!
Phoebe: Oh, yeah, sure. I just hope you, hope you dont accidentally suck it up through your nose and choke on it.
Joey: Oh my God! Thats huge! (Hugs him.) Wait a minute, why come I wasnt invited? And who was going to be your best man? Dont say, "Ross." Do not say, "Ross."
Phoebe: Okay, dont sweat it. (Looking around her.) Chandler is nowhere around so go ahead get it out of your system. That guys cute. (Points to a guy sitting behind Monica.)
Sleep Clinic Worker: Um-hmm, and did you stay up all night in preparation for your sleep study. (Joey doesnt answer) Uh, sir? (Joey starts snoring)
Phoebe: Or we could just follow your clever jokes any ideas? No! Didnt think so! Okay, cmon guys, show us where the presents are!
Ross: Yeah, obvious beauty's the worst. You know, when it's right there in your face. Me, I like to have to work to find someone attractive. Makes me feel like I earned it.
Rachel: Well, I-I-I don't know how this fits into your whole "seizing" thing but um, Emily called you today.
Teacher: She's your partner.
Joey: What, are you crazy? You havent beaten me once since my injury plagued 97 season. It would be easier if you just give me your money.
RICHARD: Uh, Phoebe, I don't think your mom would want you to see what's about to happen.
Gunther: I... I don't know if that changes your plans at all, but I thought you should know.
Joey: Joey Tribbiani! From the wall! (The dry cleaner doesnt remember) Okay, maybe this will jog your memory, huh? (Holds his picture up in front of his face.) Huh? Okay eh-ah-anyway, Im ready to go back up on the wall Im the star of a new TV show.
Mr. Geller: So its just your mother then.
JOEY: Alright, you're on. I can take two minutes out of my day to kick your ass.
Chandler: (pause) I dont have your boots.
Janitor: (to Ross and Susan) Wait! You forgot your legs!
Rachel: Oh my God Phoebe! I mean Im justWait a minute. If Im your maid of honor that means you are Monicas.
Phoebe: Your mom was arrested?
Richard: Youve got panties stuck to your leg.
Phoebe: No. No! Yes! Ahh. Oh, would you look at that Monica? I just knocked off all of your top scores, how sad.
Ross: you know I really admire your whole dating attitude, it's so healthy I'm always like is this moving to fast? Is this moving to slow? Where's this going?
The Interviewer: So, lets talk about women. Im sure our female readers will be interested to know about your romantic life.
Joey/Drake: Stopping you from marrying the wrong man and making the biggest mistake of your life.
Joey: Ok, I may not have treated your friends well in the past, but I have grown up a lot, really. Honest, Rach?
Chandler: Well, you know Phoebs. I don't know if it's your kinda thing, because it involves a lot of being normal. For a large portion of the day.
Joey: (to the fireman) Hey buddy, do you think I can borrow your uniform this Thursday?
Phoebe: Yeah that was lucrative! Smart like your brother!
Ross: Dude, don't worry 'bout it! I know how we can make your money back! This is a nice hotel, you know, plenty of amenities, we just load up on those! Like those apples. Instead of taking one, I'm... I take six!
Rachel: Just tell Joey that you watched the tape and you liked it, but your bosses didn't. Then that way, you're the good guy and they're the bad guys.
Monica: Well, at least youre not hearing it for the first time at your fifth grade Halloween party.
RICHARD: That's fine. Well, your other dad and I are gonna go have a romantic evening and I guess I'll just see you kids around.
Megan: I know! I almost called off my wedding. Oh, whos your band?!
RACHEL: Phoebe, how would you do this to me? This was all your idea.
Chandler: I just wanted to show Monica your book. (Ross just glares at him.)
Rachel: Chandler Bing? It's time to see your thing.
The Interviewer: Oh! I like that. Whats your name?
Rachel: And your fly's still open...
Phoebe: Oh whoa-whoa-whoa! Wait a minute, open up your hand; let me take a look. (The lady opens up her hand.) Quarter. Dime. Lint? Not interested in that. (She throws the lint away.) What's this? A Canadian coin? Get outta here! (The lady walks away.)
The Director: Hey Joey, were ready for ya! (Joey stumbles over) Joey, this is Alex hes going to be playing your son.
LITTLE BULLY: It's a nice watch, I don't wanna break it on your ribs.
Chandler: Yeah, at least you hid your feelings well about it. (Removes a smashed racquet from his bag.)
MONICA: Because, you were mean to me and you, you teased me and you always, always got your way.
Joey: Pheebs, I am so sorry! I know I promised you a fun road trip with your friend and I didnt deliver. But-but-but now I know that you think being awake is an important part of friendship! So, so, so I will strive to-to stay awake for as long as I know you.
Rachel: (grabs Chandler by the shirt) All right, listen, smirky. If it wasn't for you and your stupid balloon, I would be on a plane watching a woman do this (makes a gesture like a stewardess pointing out exits) right now. But I'm not.
Phoebe: Would you say your pesto is the best-o?
Hillary: After a while its like, shut your mouth, you know?
Joey: Okay, Im all right, okay, but hey, could you just leave your lips? (She kisses him on the cheek and starts to leave.)
Mr. Geller: Youre right, youre right. This is about your positions. Now, what I saw in the closet is not the optimum position for conceiving a child, although it might feel good.
Monica: (entering with Chandler) Who? (She looks out the window at Rosss apartment) Is that your sister?
Policeman: Its Petty. (He grabs Rosss license.) Ill be right back with your ticket. (Walks back to his car.)
Joey: Well, I've never been through the tunnel myself, 'cause as I understand it, you're not allowed to go through with more than one girl in the car, right. But, it seems to me it's pretty much like anything else, you know, face your fear. It have a fear of heights, you go to the top of the building! If you're afraid of bugs.....get a bug. Right. In this case, you have a fear of commitment, so I say you go in there and be the most committed guy there ever was.
Chandler: Did your Dad ever dress up like Santa?
Ross: You'd better hope not because I just read what you put on your page today.
Phoebe: That's easy for you to say, I don't see three kids coming out your vagina!
Joey: Well, not that its any of your business, but, no, we havent, okay?
Monica: So ah, Phoebe, how was your date?
Monica: All right, look, I hate this as much as you, but if it makes you feel better, its all your fault.