words in movies
Rachel: Oh, Phoebe, are you still on hold? I was supposed to call my Dad back like two hours ago.
Monica: You were the next caller five hours ago. You must be going crazy.
Rachel: Ross! Your honor, rest assured relationship ended like two years ago! (To the stenographer) And could you strike "Consummated like bunnies" from the record?
Rachel: Phoebe, you had a date three days ago.
Phoebe: No way! No way! You just broke with Tag a week ago.
[Cut to Rosss apartment, he his playing the Bagpipes, badly. Hes worse than that whole keyboard thing a few years ago.]
Ross: Its from France In Europe Western Europe. Yknow umm, a few years ago I actually was backpacking across Western Europe.
Ross: Well she should, it was taken ten years ago!
Joey: (entering) Hey! You guys! Remember that audition I had a while ago and didnt get the part?
Joey: About a month ago this guy spent the night with Rachel, I didnt see who it was but (He walks out and closes the door.)
Rachel: Well it happened about six weeks ago, and uh I had just got home from work and Ross was already there cause I guess he had been hanging out with Joey.
Ross: (angrily) I knew you were gonna throw that in my face!! That was three years ago! She apologized and she apologized! What more do you want?!!
Cecilia: I probably shouldve just left years ago when the offers were pouring in, but yknow I just got so comfy here! And Ohh, I turned down some amazing work!
Monica: They all came from the list you handed out to us two weeks ago.
Monica: I wanted to do this days ago so I think I should go first.
Monica: I will prove it to you! Okay? About a week ago I was wearing those jeans and I dropped a pen in my lap and it left an ink stain on the crotch. Now when she comes back I will find it and show you that stain!
Ross: I mean, theres no point in spending time with someone if-if its just fun. Its gotta be, its gotta be going somewhere right? So where-where is it going? (Pause) Ah! Thats-thats the real question. And-and the answer is is its going somewhere fun. Now I-I know what youre thinking, fun was fine for you like ten years ago yknow, but youre-youre not getting any younger. No I meanNo not you, not you, youyou are getting younger. I meanyou-you look like youre getting younger by the secondWhats your secret?
Phoebe: I got it for your wedding and I ordered it weeks ago, and it finally got here!
Monica: I thought I lost it. I got a new one, like, a month ago.
Eric: Two weeks ago.
Rachel: About an hour ago.
Will: Yeah, I hated her. She was horrible to me in high school. But hey, it was a long time ago, Im in a good place, it might be actually fun to see her again. You got any cakes or cookies or something? (Starts looking.) No Will no!
Joey: Okay. (Clears throat) Years ago, when I was backpacking across Western Europe
Rachel: I dont care how long ago it was! You told people that I was half and half! Yknow what? I just want to point out I never did anything to hurt you in high school.
The Interviewer: Oh, I know what I wanted to ask you. You were on the show years ago and then they killed you off. What happened there?
Monica: Thats my old dog. He passed away years ago.
Roy: No, no, you're right. Who am I kidding? I should have hung up that breakaway jockstrap years ago. What am I gonna do? I mean, this has been my life for thirty two years. Taking my clothes off in front of people is all I know.
Joey: Yeah. I realized it about a half-hour ago but I didn't want to say anything 'cause I didn't want to jinx it.
Mrs. Green: I know, my daughters told me about it when they received their impromptu invitations a month ago.
Rachel: Joey relax! My mother picked her up two hours ago. You were there!
Joey: come on, come on, search your brain all right. it was (thinks) a certain amount of time ago, I was here you were here, we had sex (starts pointing out the places) here, here, here NOT there. Anything?
Phoebe: No, uhm... David and I did use to go out... but years ago, and he lives in Minsk. He's only... he's only in town for a couple of days.
Amy: Oh come on, that was 20 years ago. Get over it.
Ross: Years and years ago there were these people called the Maccabees...
Chandler: Seriously dude, 3 years ago.
Gavin: Thank god you finally said that, I saw you make a note on your pad three hours ago. (Rachel throws away that paper) Man, I really bug you, don't I?
Ross: No no, about a month ago she gave her number to some guy in a bar.
Woman: You already hit on me an hour ago
Joey: Oh, no don't worry about that, I swallowed that years ago.
Ross: We are having a baby together, but were not involved. (The cashier, a very beautiful woman, looks confused) I mean, uh we-we were seeing each other a while ago, but then we were just friends. And then there was one drunken night. (Rachel looks at him angrily) Or, yes stranger, wed like this delivered please.
Ross: So? Sure! But it-it wouldnt be anything romantic. And Im-Im dating MonaDamnit Mona! I was supposed to meet her like an hour ago! What is wrong with me?!
RACHEL: Oh God.� It seems like forever ago.
Rachel: What, slept together a year and a half ago? Yeah, I'm all set.
Chandler: Yes there are, I just saw them a few minutes ago.
Joey: All right!! Okay, it was like four years ago. Okay, Ginger and I had gone out a few times, and then this one weekend, we went up to her Dads cabin. Just me, her, and her annoying little dog Pepper. Well that night, I cooked this really romantic dinner....
Ross: 3 minutes ago!!! I don't know why that's important ...
Monica: Hey, you just got in 5 minutes ago!
Cecilia: Well, lets just say if I left 15 years ago, the landscape of Mexican cinema would be very different today!
Rachel: (Takes the phone) Oh! That's interesting, since she died seven years ago!!
Monica: And about an hour ago, we made an offer.
Chandler: Yeah, but it was like a million years ago, so it doesn't matter.
Chandler: Ross, that was 16 years ago!
Ross: So unbelievable. She was supposed to meet me half an hour ago with Emma. (he tries to take a cookie but Monica slaps his hand)
Chandler: A dinosaur died a million years ago?
Chandler: Joey, there was a little girl who lived here, but she died like 30 years ago.
Chandler: It's seven years ago. (he looks surprised) My time machine works!
Ross: Yeah, I'm a friend of Rachel Green's. Uhm, actually we met at the Christmas party about two years ago.
Emily: Dont you point your pants at me! (She throws them on the floor.) We have no choice! Anywhere thats half-decent wouldve be booked months ago, Ross dont you understand? This is our wedding Im talking about.
Monica: Chandler, for so long I I wondered if I would ever find my prince, my soul mate. Then three years ago, at another wedding I turned to a friend for comfort. And in stead, I found everything that Id ever been looking for my whole life. And now here we are with our future before us and I only want to spend it with you, my prince, my soul mate, my friend. Unless you dont want to. You go!
Rachel: Ross is on a date with my sister and they shut the drapes two and a-half-hours ago.
Chandler: How... exactly are you pursuing that? Y'know other than sending out resumes like what, two years ago?
Phoebe: No, look, I told you that I didnt want you to try and sell it, and you just, you big fat did it anyway. God, y'know what, I think five years ago I probably wouldve done anything to play with you but, I can do it by myself. And if I cant trust you then just forget it.
Chandler: Look (hands him a drink) it was a lo-o-ong time ago.
ERICA: Well, here we sit, devil may care, just a little while ago you were reattaching someone's spinal cord.
Monica: (as Rachel) Um, okay. You just called a little while ago about needing a signature on the admissions form. Well, it turns out we need a whole new one (little laugh) because uh, you see, I-I, I put the wrong name again. (Little laugh) 'cause um...
Rachel: (to Monica) Ok, ok, ok. How did this happen to me? How did this happen to me? A week ago, two weeks ago, I was fine. Ross was just Ross, just this guy. Now he's Rrrooossss, oh, this really great guy that I can't have.
Rachel: Monica, your Sweet Sixteen was like a million years ago.
Ross: Well, technically it seven billion years ago (Well, technically youd be able to see it for days, well nights; that is if you could see it with all of the bright lights of New York.)
Ross: Well look-look Im not calling anybody! Okay? It was like a million years ago!
Ross: and thats the story of the dreidle. Now, some people trace the Christmas tree back to the Egyptians, who used to bring green palm branches into their huts on the shortest day of the year, symbolising lifes triumph over death. And that was like 4000 years ago.
PHOEBE: Ok, Ross, could you just open your mind like this much, ok? Wasn't there a time when the brightest minds in the world believed that the world was flat? And, up until like what, 50 years ago, you all thought the atom was the smallest thing, until you split it open, and this like, whole mess of crap came out. Now, are you telling me that you are so unbelievably arrogant that you can't admit that there's a teeny tiny possibility that you could be wrong about this?
Phoebe: Five minutes ago, a line like that wouldve floored me. Now nothing. Well, not nothing, I am still a woman.
Chandler: Monica, that was also true an hour ago! I mean, please, look at you! Your hand is blistered, you can barely stand, your hair is inexplicable! Ok, you've already proven you are just as good as he is, now we've missed our dinner reservations, so now let's just go upstairs, order room service, take a shower and shave your head!
Ross: All right, it's time for the story of Hanukkah. Years and years ago, there were these people called the Maccabees.
Phoebe: Its hard to believe that just a little while ago this was nothing but ingredients.
Barry: See, about a month ago, I wanted to hurt you. More than I've ever wanted to hurt anyone in my life. And I'm an orthodontist.
Ross: Funny, my birthday was seven months ago.
Janice: Hi! Hi sweetheart! This is my husband Sid, I dont think youve met him. Ross, Rachel, this is Sid. I nabbed him a year ago at the dermatologists office. Thank God for adult acne huh? (Does the laugh.)
Janine: Australia, I just moved here a couple of weeks ago.
Chandler: Ooh, you know, I had a grape about five hours ago, so I'd better split this with you.
Rachel: It was like months ago. We were walking by this antique store, and I saw this pin in the window, and I told him it was just like one my grandmother had when I was a little girl. Oh! I can't believe he remembered!
Rachel: (as Monica) Thanks! I've been here about six years, and Rachel moved in a few months ago.
Mr. Geller: I tell you one thing, I wouldn't mind having a piece of this sun-dried tomato business. Five years ago, if somebody had said to me, here's a tomato that looks like a prune, I'd say "get out of my office!"
Monica: Gosh, doesn't it seem like a million years ago?
PHOEBE: Why couldn't you have just figured this out six years ago?
JADE: Yes, yes, I did. In fact, I had sex with him 2 hours ago.
JOEY: [realizing what everyone else did a minute ago] Ooooooh.
Ross: Dont thank me! If you wanna thank something, thank the volcano that erupted thousands of years ago, killing but perfectly preserving an entire civilization. (Rachel just looks at him.) Heres Warrens number.
Chandler: Yeah, I know, I did that two minutes ago.
Ross: Try sixty-five million years ago, and then try sssshhhhhh.... My tenure review board met today and I hear it's looking really good.
RACHEL: These are from Halloween three years ago.
Ross: Filming Rachel is not something I planned. Okay look, heres what happened, and Joey you-you can back me up on this. All right, about-about a month and a half ago I came to you with a problem? Umm, a personal thing.
[The stereo system booms out 'Billions of years ago. . .'. Ross gets up and changes it to music.]
MONICA: I can't believe this, just like 2 weeks ago I was watching Sudden Death, now I'm on a date with Jean-Claude Van Damme. Can you beat up that guy? [he nods] Can you beat up that guy?
JOEY: Alright look, that's it. I don't think we should see each other anymore, alright. Look, I know I should have told you this a long time ago but I am not Drake Remore, OK. I'm not even a doctor, I'm an actor. I just pretend to be a doctor.
PHOEBE: Just, you know, long time ago. Well, when men used to tell women what to do - a lot. And then there was suffrage, which is a good thing but is sounds horrible. Do you want to get this tattoo?
ERNIE: Bert, Bert. Bert. Hey, what happened to my friend Bert? He was here just a moment ago. Oh no, my old friend Bert is lost.
PHOEBE: Just from a, from a long time ago. Is he here?
Fun Bobby: Hey, sorry I'm late. But my, uh, grandfather, he- died about two hours ago. But I-I-I couldn't get a flight out 'til tomorrow, so here I am!
Ross: No, four minutes ago you had a half hour, we have to be out the door at twenty to eight.
ROSS: Naa. A while ago I got a sah out of him, which I thought, ya know, might turn into sah-condary caregiver but... Hey, would you uh, would you hold him for a sec, 'cause I, I gotta take this off.
CHANDLER: Now wait a minute, I claimed you in the name of France four years ago.