words in movies
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Monica and Chandler are making out on one of the chairs.]
Joey: Well, I'm sorry if I'm not a middle-aged black woman! (Starts for his room.) And I'm also sorry if sometimes I go to the wrong audition! Okay, look, if I have to pretend I don't know about you two, then you two are gonna have to pretend there's nothing to know about.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Chandler, and Monica are there as Phoebe enters carrying a large box.]
(She puts her leg up on the chair and removes this huge knife from her boot to open the box with. The guys are shocked at the knife's existence.)
Monica: Look, I'm not happy about this either, but y'know if-if Ross says he's happy then we're just gonna have to keep our feelings about Emily to ourselves. Are you cool with that?
[Scene: The Storage Room in the basement of Monica and Rachel's building, Monica and Rachel are looking for something.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe are there.]
[Scene: Their Building, Monica and Rachel are going to apologize to Danny. Rachel knocks on his door, which he opens and he has this really bushy beard and long hair. Picture Paul Bunyan.]
Rachel: Hi! You might not remember us, but we are the girls that fogged you.
Joey: Uhh, are you saying that you're not entirely happy about this?
Joey: You do have a choice!! Ross, why are you listening to her?! Are you, are you crazy?!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Phoebe, Joey, and Chandler are recovering from Ross's rebuke.]
Chandler: Pheebs, what are you doing with the coat? How about the whole animal rights thing?
Phoebe: Well, I've been reading up and for your information, minks are not very nice. Okay, I admit it! I love this coat! Okay, Iit's the best thing I've ever had wrapped around me, including Phil Huntley! (She starts to leave but stops and says to Monica.) Remember Phil Huntley? He was fine!
Danny: Absolutely. Some people are just into appearances.
Rachel: Fine! I judged you. I made a snap judgement. But you did it too! And you are worse because you are sticking to your stupid snap judgement! You can't even open up your mind for a second to see if you're wrong! What does that say about you?
Phoebe: Are you still mad at us?
Chandler: Yeah, we are so sorry.
Ross: Okay. Thanks you guys. Pheebs are you wearing fur?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang, minus Rachel, are getting ready for dinner.]
Ross: What are you talking about?
Emily: I'll feel better when I'm there, and I can know where you are all the time.
Phoebe: (to the squirrel) Okay, stop tormenting me! This mink! Okay, they're mean! And they hate squirrels! And y'know, okay, most of these probably wanted to be coats! (The squirrel stares at her.) All right, fine, now I get it. (To the clerk.) Here. (She hands him her coat.) You take it. (To the squirrel.) Are you happy now? I'm cold!
Joey: Now YOU'RE telling me I can't see her?? You guys are killing me! She's forbidden fruit! It's like ... like she's the princess and I'm the stable boy ... Why are you doing this, huh? Did Ross tell you not to let me go over there?
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment. They are having a diner party with Phoebe and Mike.]
Ross: You too! What are the odds?
Mr Campbell: Well, if you don't want to leave, why are we having this lunch?
[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler and Monica are there when Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: What are you, what are you talking about? How did this happen?
[Scene: The playground. Ross, Rachel and Emma are still there. Rachel comes walking to Ross and Emma with something between her hands.]
Ross: No seriously. I have job security for life. You know, I never have to worry. (Rachel starts crying) Oh, look at you. Look how happy you are for me.
Joey: (squinting his eyes) Are you kiddin'? I think I just saw a bat in the corner!
Girl: Who are you?
Phoebe: Great, okay, what are you gonna change it to?
Joey: Oh, hi, I'm Joey. My stupid friends are buying this house. Who are you?
Mackenzie: What are you? Eight?
Mark: Are you sure, because we may have something at Louis Vuitton.
Mark: Clever. (back to Rachel) So how are you?
Chandler: Man, those two dogs are going at it!
Woman: Oh hey, how are you?
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe and Mike are leaving.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's. They are preparing to show Laura around. Laura is standing with her back to the window, Chandler and Monica are standing on either side of her, facing each other.
[Flashback scene from last week, Monica and Chandler's kitchen, Rachel, Ross, Monica and Chandler are there.]
Monica: I know, but what are we gonna do? She really needs this job.
Announcer: Get a load of this... She's proposing to him. Guess we know who wears the pants in that family. (people are laughing, while Mike still seems bewildered)
Phoebe-Estelle: What are you saying?
Phoebe-Estelle: Don’t take that tone with me. Who you think you are? Alan Lemond, the first black man to fly solo across the Atlantic?
Rachel: Oh my God Phoebe! I mean Im justWait a minute. If Im your maid of honor that means you are Monicas.
Phoebe: Alright, wait, so what you're saying is that the chef is at the Hamilton Club, but the food is not and the drinks are there, but the bartender is not? Are you, are you FREAKING KIDDING ME!?
[Scene: house next to the one the Bings are moving into. Chandler and Monica knock, a lady opens the door.]
Girl: I'm Mackenzie. My stupid parents are selling this house.
Monica: They could be our neighbors, what are they like?
(Chandler and Monica are speechless).
Phoebe: Hey Joey, want come with me to… are you ok?
Joey: Oh, hey, my pleasure. (he suddenly becomes very serious) So what are your intentions with my Phoebe?
Chandler: The only way that that is going to happen, is if the other couple are the Hitlers.
[Scene: The house Monica and Chandler are viewing. Janice comes down the stairs.]
Mike: I heard that weddings are like a 40 billion dollar a year industry.
Janice: Chandler, what are you talking about?
Rachel: You are never going to believe what happened to me today.
Ross: So, what are you gonna do?
Joey: You know what? You are my friends, I wanna be supportive, I will come with you. SHOTGUN!
Rachel: The nights are the hardest. (Checks her watch.) But then the day comes! And thats every bit as hard as the night. And then the night comes again
[Scene: Joey's place. Rachel and Joey are talking]
Rachel: I know... Honey, seriously, I did it all. The luggage that I'm taking is in the bedroom, this is Emma's Paris stuff, these are the boxes that I'm having shipped, and that's the sandwich that I made for the plane...
Erica: Plus hotels are fun! My room has this little fridge full of free snacks!
Ross: Oh man, I can't believe you guys are leaving this place.
Ross: What are you guys doing?
Monica (enters the room): Are, are you kidding? This is packing?
Rachel: You guys are gonna come and visit me, right?
[Scene: Guest room. Rachel and Phoebe are sitting on the bed.]
Phoebe: It's a cotton swab with a bit of my saliva on it, so that if they perfect the cloning process while you are over there, you can use the DNA to create your own Pheebs!
[Scene: Central Perk. The entire gang is there, and Chandler and Monica are handing out presents.]
Chandler: Really? Then what are they doing in our guestroom?
Monica: What are you talking about? These aren't mine.
Ross: Are you kidding? Oh my God...
[Scene: The guest bedroom. Rachel and Monica are talking to each other.]
Chandler: Don't say Richard! Well, if they're not Monica's and they're not yours, then whose are they?
Chandler: I think these are yours.
Phoebe: These are not mine... Look how flimsy they are, come on! Good God! You try to hang a guy from a waterpipe with these, they'll snap like a piece of licorice.
Ross: God! I can't believe she saved me for last. (looking out to the balcony) Why are they taking so long?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. The others are still there.]
Monica: Oh no! You and Phoebe are gonna help me in here.
Chandler: Hey Mon, I think I figured out whose handcuffs they are.
Monica: Erica, are you okay?
Erica: (in pain) Ooh! Are you sure?
Monica: Erica, are you okay?
(He starts. And well, Celebration was never meant to be played on the bagpipe, so even the best bag pipe players in the world would have trouble with that particular song. So of course, for a beginner like Ross, it sounds absolutely dreadful. The assembled audience minus Phoebe, are horrified. Phoebe, immune to bad music, seems to enjoy it.)
[Cut to Ross's apartment. Ross and Rachel are there. It's another scene from 1016 TOW Rachel's Going Away Party.]
Chandler: Where are you going?
[Scene: The delivery room at the hospital. Monica, Chandler and Erica are there. Erica is in labor, and she is breathing heavily.]
Monica: What kind of social situation are you comfortable with?
Phoebe: David! (He kisses her cheek) What-what are you doing here? Arent you supposed to be in Russia?
Joey: Yeah, Erica went into labor last night. Monica and Chandler are at the hospital right now!
Joey: So what does that mean? Are you guys getting back together?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. They are hauling out the porcelain dog from Joey's room. Chandler is holding the dog by the rear in a rather interesting position.]
Monica: (to her son) Oh, hey handsome! Oh, I'm gonna love you so much that no woman is ever gonna be good enough for you! (To Chandler, on the verge of tears) Oh, we are so lucky!
Chandler: Oh, yeah! These are the faces of two people in the know!
[Scene: Cousin Frannies Wedding Reception, Monica and Ross are entering and finding their table.]
Chandler: Monica, we are not ready to have two babies!
Monica: That doesn't matter! We have waited so long for this. I don't care if it's two babies. I don't care if it's three babies! I don't care if the entire cast of "Eight is Enough" comes out of there! We are taking them home, because they are our children!
[Scene: Central Perk. Ross, Phoebe and Joey are there.]
Rachel: Are you kidding? Eight hours with my mother talking about Atkins? Good luck, Emma!
[Scene: The hospital. Monica and Chandler are holding the twins, while two nurses are taking care of Erica.]
Phoebe: Hey, what are you working on?
Joey: Oh, they're so cute! Now, what, what kinds are they?
Joey: Yeah, you are!
Ross: Are we off the bridge?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Monica, Chandler and Joey are there, packing the last boxes.]
This is a special out takes episode. The cast and Conan are sitting around the set of Central Perk, talking about the stuff weve never seen.
(They realise that the birds are in the foosball table.)
Phoebe: Ross, where are you going?
(They run to the ticket counter, but they get stuck behind a group of old people who are walking very slowly.)
Phoebe: What? What are you just gonna walk up to her at the gate? Have you never chased anyone through the airport before?
Phoebe: Me taking care of you is no problem, huh? You guys feel safe. Right? Okay, Im gonna take that spit bubble as, "Yeah, I do!" Okay, after I get rid of this dirty diaper Leslie, Ill set you up with a clean one. (She throws it at the garbage without looking, misses, and knocks over a vase and flowers, which fall to the floor and break.) Okay, Im sorry. I didnt mean to scare you. I just have to clean that up. Okay? Cause lets face it, were at Monicas. (She crawls over, disposes of the diaper, picks up the flowers, and the vase.) I broke it. All right. Well, thats just the way that goes. (She throws out both the flowers and the vase.) Okay, good. (She turns around and only counts two babies.) Why are there only two of you? Where is Leslie? Well, you cant answer. (She starts looking for her) Leslie? Where are you Leslie? Leslie, now would be a good time for your first words! (She turns around and finds that Leslie has managed to crawl into the bottom drawer of the TV cabinet.) Well, look at you! Hey! You are a little bit mischievous! My gosh! (She picks her up and notices a surprise is waiting in the drawer.) Oh, youre a lot mischievous! Well, itll dry. (Closes the drawer with her foot.) (To Leslie) Okay, you sit with your brother and sister nowwho arent there! (They both have disappeared as well.)
Monica: Oh my God! Ross, you wouldn't believe the cute little noises the twins are making. Listen.
Monica: Newark airport. Why, where are you?
Air stewardess: Excuse me, sir, where are you going?
Rachel: Wait, what are you doing?
Waiter: Are you worried your date came, saw you, and left?
Rachel: Oh my God... What.. What are you guys doing here?
Gate attendant #2: Miss? Are you boarding the plane?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Joey, Chandler, Monica and the twins are there. Everything has been put into boxes.]