words in movies
Ross: Okay. (He leans in to kiss her again, but she leans back preventing him from making contact.) Wow, its-its 5:30 in the morning. (Rachel laughs) So, Id better get cracking on this baby.
Joey: (jumping up in a hole that he is digging, he is shoulder deep) Hey, you guys! Take a look at this! (Chandler and Monica jump up and go over to the hole.) Check this baby out, dug me a hole!
Monica: Do you realize that four weeks from today were getting married? Four weeks baby!! Four weeks!!!
Joey: Saw the Porsche out there Mon, lookin good. When do I get to take that baby out again?
Rachel: You WHAT? You sang... to our baby daughter... a song about a guy who likes to have sex with women with giant asses?
Phoebe: I know! Monicas gonna have a baby! Hey, can this count as her something new?
Ross: Susan wanted a Chunky. We're having a baby, ok, a baby, you don't stop for Chunkys.
Chandler: Big picture please! So I was in the gift shop, and thats when I uh, saw this. (He holds up a little, tiny baby jumper that reads I (heart) New York.) Yeah, yknow what? I thought anything that can fit into this, cant be scary.
Chandler: Our baby.
Monica: What baby?
Chandler: (To Monica) I love you. And I know about the baby.
Monica: We have a baby?
Phoebe: Oh and theyre gonna have a baby.
Monica: Well I-I talked to and uh, shes definitely going to have this baby. Yknow, she said she was gonna raise it on her own.
Rachel: I know, I lied! I didnt want her to think I was a terrible mother! I cant even see my own baby!
Rachel: Yeah. Im gonna have a baby. Im gonna have a baby. Im gonna have a baby! (They all hug.)
Rachel: Well then you have his baby.
Phoebe: You dont know him. Its not important. He wants nothing to do with me or the baby. (She sits down like shes pregnant.)
Joey: Oh my God Pheebs! Youre gonna have a baby?
Phoebe: Yes. Yes I am. Oh my God, Im gonna have a baby! (Joey and Phoebe hug.)
Phoebe: Thank God, cause that hair on a baby
Monica: Phoebe I think he would notice if you didnt have a baby in nine months!
Rachel: Im having a baby.
JEANNIE: Oh, that sounds lovely. We're gonna have to set that up. Oh, I better get back. Hope the baby feels better.
Monica: This is so great! And Im gonna be your babys aunt!
Joey: Yknow, Monica and Chandler are married. Ross and Rachel are having a baby. Maybe you and I should do something.
Ross: Im just saying if you cant eat by yourself, how do you expect to have a baby by yourself?
Dr. Long: Okay, everything looks good. Here it is on the screen. (We see Ross and Rachel looking at the screen.) Here is your uterus. And right here is your baby.
Ross: Yeah, thats our baby.
Joey: I dont see the baby. Where is it?
Monica: It was great! It was great! How about you?! I mean youre having a baby!
Ross: Yes lets. Yknow what? Uh, its-its not important. What is important is that, is that were having a baby. And its notDoesnt matter who came on to who.
Ross: No! No I cant. I mean Rachels out with some guy. My baby went with her. If anything that picture keeps moving further away.
Ross: A ferry? My baby is going on a ferry? Do you have any idea how dangerous those are?!
Joey: Thats okay Ross maybe you need a new picture. Okay? Its not gonna be what you thought, but no matter what theres gonna be a brand new little baby, your baby. Who cares what the picture looks like?
Ross: Yeah I know. (Pause) On the other hand in um, in about seven months youre gonna have something that youre gonna love more than any guy youve ever gone out with. Just wait. Wait until uh, wait until the first time your baby grabs your finger. You have no idea.
Ross: Yeah, you didnt expect her to live there with a baby did you?
Ross: Well I dont know, but how-how great would that be huh? You living in my building. I could help take care of the baby. I can come over whenever I want. (Rachel looks at him.) With your permission.
Rachel: Yeah, I cant live with Joey once the baby comes. I dont want my childs first words to be, (in a babys voice) "How you doin?"
Joey: Look, if Im bringing home a woman who cant stand being around a baby, then maybe I dont want to be with that woman! Or maybe well just do it in the bathroom of the club!
Ross: Yeah, but when the baby comes shes gonna want to move.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel enters and notices that Joey has set up a space for the baby where the couch was, complete with a crib.]
Rachel: But Joey the baby is going to be crying, its going to be loud.
Rachel: Honey, its not just a matter of where you put it. I mean a baby changes everything. They cry all the time. I mean imagine bringing home some girl and trying to score when theres a screaming baby around.
Rachel: Oh but Joey, I have to go. Theres no room for a baby here.
Rachel: No its okay, this is whats gonna happen. Im gonna wait a couple years and then the baby will tell him.
Joey: (on cell phone) Im sorry I gotta cancel tonight baby
Rachel: Hey, that is the babys problem. (Dr. Green returns.) Oh, everything okay with the waiter?
Phoebe: Why, so he can get mad at the baby?
Joey: Hey! Uh, this is just to give you an idea. Okay well, we can put screens here, (In front of the crib.) so that the baby has privacy, and-and-and maybe a mobile over the crib. And uhOh look! Heres a baby monitor (Holds it up), which until the baby comes we can use as walkie-talkies. Huh?
Chandler: Shes okay with Rachel and the baby?
Phoebe: Gosh. Im not gonna let that man make you eat your baby. (They both sit down by the rest of the gang and Phoebe recognizes a man by the window.) Oh. Hey! Who is that guy? I think I know him.
Rachel: Okay. Um ButOkay, yes Ross and I used to date. And yes we are gonna have a baby. But we are definitely not getting back together.
Joey: Because! Cause Cause youre my baby sister!
Joey: I didnt look at it. Stupid babys head was blocking most of it.
Rachel: (pause) Hes talking to the baby.
Dina: Were gonna be all right. I mean, even if were not married this baby is gonna be so loved. Not just by us.
Ross: Yeah. I mean we are having a baby together.
Dina: Do you ever worry that youll be walking and your baby will just like slip out?
Phoebe: Hey, are you going to find out the sex of the baby?
Ross: Baby got back (Then Ross turns around and sees their friends standing in the doorway)
Dr. Long: Okay! All your tests look fine. Now, are you two interested in knowing the sex of the baby?
Joey: (entering) Rachels having her baby!! (Phoebe turns and looks at him.) Which is of no interest to me, Im a neurologist.
Phoebe: Are you two talking about the same baby? Hey! Have you started off thinking of names yet?
Ross: So, I uh I called the doctor and now we both know the sex of the baby.
Joey: Hey Ross! The babys kicking!
Rachel: Oh, yes! Well have ourselves a little baby Ruth
Rachel: Oh Joey, Im so happy things worked out for us that were having this baby together. I love you so much.
(She hands the baby to Joey who pulls down the blanket to reveal Rosss face where the babys should be.)
(Finally, the baby is delivered and starts crying.)
Rachel: Joey! The baby is kicking for the first time! Will you please come feel this?!
Doctor: Oh, here is your beautiful baby. Congratulations!
<Ross and Rachel are putting baby stuff together like they're going to be going somewhere.>
Ross: My God, the babys kicking. Thats great. Although I kinda wish I-I wouldve been there to feel the kicking for the first time yknow.
Joey: And-and theres no danger to her and the baby?
Rachel: Oh well yeah me too. Um.. I had a baby.
Ross: No I-I-I would love to be around for you and the baby. And we-we can just try it like on a temporary basis.
Phoebe: You want it there? You take it there baby!
Rachel: My boss wants to buy my baby!
Monica: Is this the video of the baby being born? Sweetie, this is Phoebes. Why were you even watching it?
Rachel: (thinking) Youre going to have a baby, and you need to be prepared. Now, youre going to make yourself watch the whole thing. Just do it! (Rachel puts the tape in the VCR)
Rachel: and I know Chandler is kidding but it happens every time he touches my stomach. I mean Im really worried the babys not going to like him. (Joey is staring at the table.) Are you okay?
Rachel: Okay. (watching the tape) Ooh, my! (Rachel jumps when the woman starts screaming) Woah! Why is that baby torturing that woman?!
Chandler: No, the babys out! Look, look!
Ross: Rachel whos carrying my baby? Rachel?
Ross: A pigeon, a pigeon. (previously scared Rachel turns away) No, no wait, no-no, an eagle flew in. Landed on the stove and caught fire. The baby, seeing this, jumps across the apartment to the mighty bird�s aid. The eagle, however, misconstrues as an act of aggression and grabs the baby on its talon. Meanwhile the faucet fills the apartment with water. Baby and bird still up lays (?) are locked in a death grip, swirling around the whirl pool, that fills the apartment.
Joey: What he wants to buy your baby?!
Joey: Man! When you said it was a problem about your boss and the baby I figured it was something about maternity leave.
Rachel: Yeah, and umm my baby.
Joey: Do you think you can just buy my friends baby?!
Joey: Yeah you are baby.
Monica: You said your boss wants to buy your baby?!
Rachel: No! No, no-no-no Joey he doesnt want to buy my baby! I made that up!
Chandler: Wow, Ralph Lauren is really going out of there way to show theyre not in the baby buying business.
Mona: Yeah, you still have feelings for me. And-and to be honest, I-I still have feelings for you. And I wish that we can work it out Ross, but we cant. Its too complicated with you and Rachel and the baby, I-I just It just wasnt meant to be.
Aunt Lisa: Congratulations on the baby, and on the wedding
Ross: Yeah baby!
Ross: Yeah well, he's not gonna get this one. Ben is way cuter than that kid. I mean look at him, look at you, (Starts to whine like a baby and Joey just glares at him.)
Rachel: So whats the final head count on my baby shower?
Phoebe: What? Hes gonna be dressed as a baby! (Mrs. Green enters.) Oh hi Mrs. Green!
Rachel: So my mother is not coming to my baby shower?!
Mrs. Green: Its like youre a cave person. Rachel, you must get a nanny. You dont know how overwhelming this is going to be. I mean when you were a baby I had full time help, I had Mrs. Kay.