words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel and Chandler are on the couch.]
Chandler: Oh! (Puts his hand on her belly.) Shes growing inside you.
Chandler: Oh! (Pulls his hand away.)
Chandler: I think thats the youngest girl ever to reject me.
Chandler: Oh hey!
Phoebe: Uh-huh, (To Chandler) and you?
Chandler: No. I mean I believe that uh, certain people are more suited for each other and I believe in falling in love, but soul mates, I dont think they exist.
Chandler: Why?
Chandler: What?
Chandler: Come on, dont be crazy. (To Rachel) You dont think theres someone out there better suited for Monica than me, do ya? (Rachel looks at him.)
Chandler: A tall guy with hair similar to mine, oh unknowable universe!
Chandler: Luckily, the guy she settled for cant hear what youre talking about.
Chandler: You believe that this guy is destined for someone else and youre still gonna date him?
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Chandler are on the couch as Phoebe enters with Monicas soul mate.]
Phoebe: Umm, Chandler, Monica, this is Don.
Don: Oh, hello. (Shakes Chandlers hand.) Hello. (Shakes Monicas hand.)
Phoebe: (mouths to Chandler) Soul mate.
Chandler: (mouths to Phoebe) What?
Chandler: Whats wrong with sun-dried tomatoes? (Everyone stares at him.) On a barbecue chicken pizza? (Still theres staring.) No?
(They go over to the counter and Chandler moves closer to Phoebe.)
Chandler: What are you doing?!
Chandler: I believe in tall, handsome strangers who hit on my wife!
Monica: Yeah! Oh hes great, I love him. (Walks away and Chandler glares at Phoebe.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Chandler are watching Monica and Don talk.]
Chandler: Cheese you say? Thats some pretty smelly work, huh Don?
Chandler: Cheese, its smelly. You must smell a lot of the time too.
Monica: Me too! Yeah, Chandler cant stand it. He wont even allow me to have blue cheese in the house.
Don: And youre still married to him? (They both laugh, and Chandler tries to but fails.)
Chandler: Is it made of cheese?
Chandler: (disgusted) Oh come on! (To Phoebe) Are you listening to this?
Chandler: What do we do?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Chandler are entering.]
Chandler: Sure, why dont you set it up. Ill just be over here, browsing through the personals.
Chandler: Yeah, fine. Fine. Not perfect!! But good enough.
Chandler: Im sorry, did you say cheese?
Chandler: Phoebe thinks you and Don are soul mates, and I dont believe in that kind of stuff. But then you two totally get along. So look, I wont stand in your way if you want to run off with Don and live in a house of cheese.
Monica: Chandler, you dont believe in soul mates?
Chandler: No. But Im sure (mimics Don) tomatoes does.
Chandler: You dont?
Chandler: So you you dont want to live with Don in a cheese house?
Chandler: I love you.
Chandler: Yknow what? I am going to take you out to dinner tonight. I found this place that makes the greatest mozzarella sticks and jalepino poppers . (Monica doesnt look impressed.) No? Really? They taste so good.
Rachel: and I know Chandler is kidding but it happens every time he touches my stomach. I mean Im really worried the babys not going to like him. (Joey is staring at the table.) Are you okay?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, and Joey are watching ET.]
Chandler: No, no he went for a walk.
Rachel: I know, I know! I just can't keep this one in, so I pick up the phone (Joey in a childish attempt to not hear what Rachel is about to say, puts his fingers in his ears and starts to scream loudly. Rachel turns and walks out upon seeing that Joey's not gonna listen, and as she exits Chandler walks in and sees Joey in his current state.)
[The door opens and Chandler comes in. Rachel covers the door with a blanket]
Chandler: Please, please, please, don't be mad at me.
Chandler: Clunkers?! Oh my god!
Chandler: (to Clunkers) It is so good to see you!
Chandler: Oh, you should live with Joey, Roll-os everywhere.
Chandler: It's up to you.
Doug: No-no, I heard what you said, funny. I like funny. (Chandler starts to leave) This team is about hard work, but its also about having fun. Good to have you aboard Bing! (smacks him on the butt, and Chandler leaves shocked.)
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Chandler, Joey, and Ross are finishing watching Die Hard on video.]
Chandler: All right.
Chandler: Yeah. (Throws the pad on the table and heads for the bedroom)
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, later that night, there is someone knocking on the door and Chandler stumbles out into the living room, turns on the light, looks through the peephole, and opens the door.]
Chandler: Okay. Okay.
Chandler: Okay, let me just straighten out your helmet there. (Does so.)
Ben: (To Chandler) Thanks daddy.
Chandler: That sounds like my first bike. (They all turn and look at him.) My dad gave me his old one.
Chandler: Im sorry, who?
Chandler: Hey! What are you guys doing?
Chandler: But we dont know the neighbors.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica is cooking, Joey is eating, and Chandler is entering from the bedroom.]
Chandler: Wouldnt it be easier if we just moved?
Chandler: Yes, yes, we did, thanks to Vidal Buffay.
Chandler: Eh, somebodys in a good mood!
Rachel: Well yknow, we did other stuff too. (Joey and Chandler start to giggle.)
Chandler: Weirder than watching his two moms make out? (Monica nods in agreement.)
Chandler: Well, either that or uh (Motions towards Joeys door.)
Chandler: Look, she's not backing down! She went like this! (He does a little mimic of her dance.)
Chandler: (about to cry) Am not!
Chandler: (laughs) 4:00 A.M.
Chandler: I am sorry, but some of us have to get up early and go to work! (Monica looks at him) (To Monica) He does not know that I am not some of us.
Phoebe: (starts to leave, but stops) Oh and Chandlers about to cry.
CHANDLER: Well, you want me to uh, clench anything, or-... Susie? Susie.
Chandler: Hey! So are you enjoying the bike?
Chandler: And I will cook anything you want in here (points to the kitchen), and do anything in there! (Points to the bedroom.)
Joey: Almost cried huh? Hear that Chandler? Almost cried!
Chandler: (with his mouth full) What happened? Im just eating candy.
Chandler: What is the matter with you?
Chandler: Yknow what would work?
Joey: (watching the discussion) Hey Chandler, do we know that lady?
Joey and Chandler: Yeah, thats her.
Chandler: Stop making candy!
Chandler: I know you probably dont want to go out with me, yknow because I make too many jokes and Ive never been in a serious relationship and I guess Im not technically a "doctor "
Chandler: You mean they like you.
Monica: Oh, you really want to talk about getting people to like you huh, funny man? (Joey laughs but stops when Chandler turns to glare at him.)
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey sits at a table and Chandler and Monica enter.]
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica is making candy like mad as Ross enters.]
Monica: What am I gonna do?! That is the dress! That is the dress! Wh Chandler wants the band. What do I do?
Chandler: Centerpieces!
[The next flashback is from The One Where Eddie Moves In. It's the sequence where Joey and Chandler are both saddened that they're not living together anymore. All By Myself is playing in the background.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Monica, Ross, and Chandler are watching Phoebe polish the daisies on her bike outside.]
Ross: I don't know, I'm one sorry polentologist. (Stops reading.) All right Joey, we get it. (To Chandler) I'm sorry.
Monica: Oh please! (To Chandler) Did you hear that? Little drops of heaven.
Phoebe: Well, you know what Chandler? I think you've gotta face it. You're like, the guy in the big office, you know. You're the one that hires them, that fires them... They still say you're a great boss.
Chandler: Joey!
Chandler: What are you doing?
Chandler: I know what you meant!! (pause) You notice that ever since we got this chick, weve been fighting a lot more than we used too?
Chandler: All right, yknow what? Forget it, all of you forget it! Youve ruined it! Go home! Youve ruined it! Youve ruined it!
Monica: (To Chandler) Thank you.
Chandler: Youre welcome. (They kiss.)
TRANSIT AUTHORITY GUY: He's here. (Chandler and Joey hug each other in relief) I'm assuming one of you is the father.
Chandler: Pheebs?
Chandler: Hey!
Chandler: Skull?
Chandler: betrothed couple.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is on the phone, Rachel and Monica are sitting in the kitchen.]
Chandler: Get in here! (They head for the door and Chandler sees Smokes-A-Lot Lady standing next to the door and smoking, to her) Hey, and you can not smoke in here! (Takes the cigarette and takes a drag for himself.) (Exhaling in ecstasy) Merry Christmas.
Chandler: Lovely!
Chandler: Why not?
Chandler: Hey!
Chandler: How long have we been home?
Chandler: Hey, you know what I was thinking? When we get married, are you gonna change your last name to Bing?
Chandler: No reason, except she told me.
Chandler: No! No, she didn't say that. I-I-I think you should talk to Monica now.
Chandler: Ohh! You guys gonna be living together again?
Ross: HEY, SHE'S FAST!! OKAY?!! (Chandler is so shocked at Ross's outburst that he drops his spoon and backs up) Oh! You-you think you can be beat me? Let's go! Outside!!
Chandler: Bing doesn't seem so weird now, does it?
Chandler: Is that why you became a chef? So that people would like you?
[Scene: Michelle's, Chandler and Monica enter.]
Chandler: Give him money? It was a joke!
Monica: (pulling Chandler away from the Maitre d') You need to give him money.
Chandler: Had the money in the wrong hand. (Shows her his left hand with the money in it)
Chandler: Okay. (Walks back to Monica)
Chandler: Forty-five minutes? We have tickets to the Musicman at 8:00.
Chandler: Richard used to do it, didn't he?
Chandler: (walks up to the Maitre d') Excuse me...
Chandler: How do you know so much about this?
[Scene: Central Perk, Gunther is serving Chandler and Monica coffee.]
Chandler: Hey Pheebs!
Ben: Santa! (Runs to Chandler and hugs him)
Chandler: What?
Chandler: Hey! (Grunts as Ben hits him at full speed.)
Chandler: Why?
Chandler: Thank you Gunther, put it there. (He gets up, and shakes Gunther's hand. A bunch of coins fall out his hand. He sits down next to Monica.) Definitely not easier with coins. (Joey gets up and picks up the coins. Chandler thinks, Joey is just helping him to pick them up.) Thank you.
Ross: (to Chandler) What are you doing?
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica has just opened the door for Ross who is costumed as an Armadillo. Ben is standing next to her.]
Chandler: Fine, I'll give the suit back.
Ross: I'm sorry, Chandler but this, this is really important to me.
Chandler: Santa? Really?