words in movies
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is eating breakfast as Chandler comes out of his bedroom, ripping his coat in the process.]
Chandler: Wow! That ripped! That ripped real nice!
Chandler: You dont turn and slide, you throw it out! Im tired of having to get a tetanus shot every time I get dressed!
Chandler: All right, how about we, how bout we sell it.
Chandler: (nods his head) Do you mind if we stick you in another cabinet? (to Joey) They seem all right with it!
Chandler: Uh-huh, first you tell us where you got the prettiest lace in all the land.
Chandler: (reading the ad) Stunning entertainment center. Fine, (pause) fine Italian craftsmanship. (Joey is very proud of himself)
Chandler: You want it?
Chandler: Ahh, Gepeto, $5,000 dollars? Are you insane?
Chandler: All right look, Im changing it to 50 bucks, or your best offer.
Chandler: (looks at him) Nooo.
Chandler: I cant believe you dont know what I do for a living!
Phoebe: No Dr. Skeptismo! Im sure. First of all, okay, theres the feeling. (Chandler shrugs) Okay, and for another, how about the fact that she went into my guitar case which is lined with orange felt. (Rachel nods her head in unsure agreement) My Mothers favourite fish is Orange Roughy... (Joey thinks he understands, but then nods that he has no clue.) Cats....like....fish! (Ross and Rachel are totally lost) (to the cat) Hi, Mommy. (Rachel covers her mouth, in an Oh my God. gesture) Oh, I havent seen this smile in 17 years!
Joey: (to Chandler) Dude, Phoebes mom has got a huge peni...
Chandler: (interrupting) Let it go!!
Chandler: Yes, Joey has a very careful screening process. Apparently, not everyone is qualified to own wood and nails.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey and Chandler are showing a couple of guys (Tony and Peter) the entertainment center.]
Chandler: Youll have to pardon my roommate, he wanted to marry this.
(Joey jumps up in excitement and without turning around Chandler holds out his hand stopping him, and ushering him back into his seat. Joey sits down, dejected.)
Chandler: Y'know, I, I really dont think we need a canoe.
Chandler: All right, just, just take the entertainment center, and then when you get home, throw the canoe away!
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, Monica, and Ross are there.]
Chandler: Y'know what, I think this might be one of the times hes wrong.
Chandler: Oh-no, hes right.
[Scene: Central Perk, the same scene is continued from before the break. With Joey, Monica, Rachel, and Chandler sitting on the couch.]
(Rachel and Chandler slide into position.)
Chandler: Im coming already!!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is showing off the entertainment center.]
(The guys takes a hockey stick and slips it through the handles then proceeds to take the stereo and Chandlers computer and walk out.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is coming home. As we walks through the door, and without looking up, he goes to throw his keys on the foosball table, only, its gone and the keys it the floor. He then looks up at an empty apartment; everything is gone except for the entertainment center and that ceramic dog. Even the food in the fridge!]
Chandler: OH MY GOD!!!
Chandler: Are you all right?!
Chandler: (lets him out) What happened?!!
Chandler: What the hell happened?!! How were you locked in?!! And where the hell is all of our stuff?!!
Chandler: SoYou got in voluntarily?!
Chandler: BEND OVER?!!!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Rachel, Phoebe, and Julio are consoling Joey and Chandler.]
Chandler: Oh, umm, Joey was born, and then 28 years later, I was robbed!!
Chandler: Oh, they said uh, You dont have insurance here, so stop calling us.
Chandler, Monica, Joey, and Rachel: Thats a good call. Right.
Chandler: Pheebs, if she could come back as a couch, wed really appreciate it. (Joey nods in agreement)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey and Chandler have trading the entertainment center for the canoe. Joey is sitting in the bow, staring off into space as to envision his future full of possibilities. Chandler is sitting at the stern, staring into space and is looking at an uncertain future.]
Chandler: (she opens the door) Julie hi! Chandler Bing, I, I guess you remember me.
Chandler: (To Monica) Its a nickname, Ill explain later.
Chandler: Well, sure, but can you play it on a plane? (pats his Travel Scrabble game)
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler and Monica have returned from Julies.]
Chandler: What?
Chandler: What?!
Chandler: I would really love it if could do both.
Chandler: You-you-you didnt know that. (Pause as she nods no.) Well, I guess my work here is done!
Chandler: Look I know it was a stupid reason to break up with somebody, but I was 15!
Chandler: Bye! (Exits.)
Chandler: Okay. Okay, now wait a minute that was totally different.
Chandler: You were not supposed to hear that! I said that behind you back!
Chandler: Id carry you around in my pocket.
Chandler: Yknow what? Were not sad, were not sad, were just not 21 anymore. Yknow? Im 29 years old, damnit! And I want to sit in a comfortable chair, and watch television and go to bed at a reasonable hour!
Chandler: Okay. Uh, well dim the lights, dim the lights. (He goes to the light switch and finds its not a dimmer switch when he flips the lights off.) Or turn them out all together. Uh, no scented candles. Okay here. Here we go. (He sprays an aerosol air freshener above her.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Ross are playing chess and are both studying the board intently.]
Chandler: Come on! Why are we here?!
[Scene: N.Y.Us University Library, Ross is entering with Chandler.]
Chandler: The hot chicks?
Joey: I want to make a ship to shore call to Chandler.
Chandler: Wow thats actually pretty cool.
Chandler: You didnt bring me here to do that, did you?
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, everyone is there having breakfast and Joey enters carrying a loaf of bread.]
Chandler: Did she freak out?
Chandler: Right.
Chandler: You said no right?!
Chandler: (laughs) You said no right?
Chandler: No! That was a lie! See how easy that was?
Chandler: Yes!!
Chandler: Yes!!!
Chandler: Yknow what? Its gonna be okay. Yknow what? Shes probably not gonna even want to come.
Chandler: Well, you can't just not see Rachel anymore, she's one of your best friends.
Chandler: No-no-no-no, if we let her stay, she will stay forever!
Chandler: (To Monica) Did she see us yet? Did she see us?
Janice: Chandler?
Monica: (To Chandler) Our kids are gonna call her Aunt Janice arent they?
Chandler: Is that what youre thinking about right now?
(Chandler does the same nasal sound to Chandler.)
Chandler: Feelings, such strong feelings.
Chandler: Janice, Im sorry but umm, you cant stay here tonight.
Chandler: Say again?
Monica: Because Chandler still has feelings for you!
Chandler: You wanna tell secrets?! Okay! Okay! In college, Ross used to wear leg warmers!
[Scene: The Hallway, Chandler and Rachel are on their knees with forks trying to salvage what they can of the cheesecake off of the floor.]
[Sequence 1: Chandler is running past Phoebe with the ball, Phoebe flashes him, he stops and stares dumbfounded at her. Phoebe then runs up and takes the ball away.]
Chandler: No, no, no. No-no-no.
Chandler: I just wanted to show Monica your book. (Ross just glares at him.)
Chandler: Yeahhh. Im tellin ya something, that ah, first smoke after nap time....
Chandler: No, we're playing this game I learned at work. You have to name all the states in six minutes.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica is in the kitchen, Joey, Rachel, and Phoebe are sitting around the table writing one notepads while Chandler is looking over their shoulders.]
Chandler: No, I just always see guys doing this when they get handcuffs taken off them. (He runs over to where his pants are hanging) Hello sweet pants!
Chandler: Oh, okay, time's up!
Rachel: (comes up and rubs him on the chest) Oh Chandler, I know, I know... oh, hey! You can see your nipples through this shirt!
Chandler: Oh that's not bad, Pheebs?
Chandler: What equity investments?
Chandler: I am only one man! (Monica heads out) Okay Ross, time is up!
Ross: Okay. (goes over to the counter) (to Chandler) What ah, what is the matter with you? Whats going on?
Chandler: Okay, but if you can't no dinner!
Chandler: Look Ross, if you don't know them by now, you will never know them, okay? That is the beauty of this game. It makes you want to kill yourself.
Monica: Chandler? Can you give me a hand? (Grabs her jacket)
[Chandler and Monica head out with some stuff. Phoebe comes out of her room with a bag.]
Chandler: Which smells delicious!
Chandler: What?
[Scene: Ross' apartment, Monica and Chandler enter.]
Chandler: Well, in spite of the yummy bagels and palpable tension, I've got pants that need to be altered.
Chandler: Huh! Where is the dog?!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross and Joey are being lectured by Phoebe.]
Chandler: What is it doing here?
[Time lapse, Chandler and Monica enter.]
Chandler: Well, it still has to go, right?
Chandler: Extremely allergic, okay? If I'm anywhere near a dog for more than 5 minutes, my throat will just close up!
Chandler: (gasping) Really?
Chandler: Okay, it's um
Chandler: (to Joey) I have to! Okay? It's time! (Joey shrugs as if to say, "Do what you have to do") Okay, I hate dogs.
Monica: Chandler, if that dog's been here that long, and you haven't had a reaction, maybe you're not allergic to this dog?
Monica: Oooh, I wish she could stay here, but Chandler is allergic!
CHANDLER: Wow, I don't know what to say. [opens the box and pulls out an incredibly gaudy gold bracelet] Wow, I, I don't know what to say.
Chandler: So where are we on the whole going back to the place where they have all the marriages thing? I love you.
Chandler: Okay, it's just that dogs make me a little uncomfortable.
Chandler: (scared) Is there a puppy here?
Chandler: (to Tag) Okay, you are new!
Monica: They cant all be bad. (To Chandler) Find the one where you make your bedroom eyes. Ohh, there it is.
Chandler: (entering in a bathrobe) I just walked in the bathroom and saw Kathy naked! It was like torture!
Chandler: No-no, hes not back yet, but hell be here any minute. So uh, come on in. Have a seat. Bow or stern?
[Scene: Central Perk. Monica and Chandler are there. They have lots of brochures about adoption in front of them.]
Chandler: I dont know, but dont worry, dont worry, because I know how to take a picture now. (They get ready) Okay, see? Look down (Looks down), look down, look down (He falls asleep.)
Phoebe: Where's Chandler?
Phoebe: You know if you want, we can sneak the dog back in and Chandler wouldn't even know.
Phoebe: (interrupts him) No, no, we don't really have time for this right now. Okay, we have to keep Chandler away from my bedroom.
Chandler: How did you know? (Heads back into the bathroom)
Chandler: (comes out of the bathroom) Here I am.
Phoebe: I've had that dog there for three days and Chandler had no idea. He's not so smart.
Chandler: Why not?
Chandler: Why not?
Chandler: Well, I, I should go in there.
Chandler: (comes out of the bathroom) Where's Monica?
Chandler: This is ridiculous. (He heads for Phoebe's bedroom)
Joey: (entering) Okay, I'm in my sweat pants. Bring on the food! (Sees that Chandler has a worried look on his face) What's the matter?
Chandler: And that doesn't scare you? (He walks out)
Chandler: Monica's all upset, because I sent Clunkers away.