words in movies
Rachel: Thats right, still no baby! (To Monica, Joey, and Chandler on the couch) Come on people! Please make some room!
(Rachel turns and looks at the group on the couch and they move over. Chandler measures the room theyve made with his arm and decides its not enough and they all move over again.)
Chandler: Lets. (Everyone gets up and leaves Rachel.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe, Chandler, Joey, and Monica are there as Rachel enters.]
Chandler: Hey! Did you have the baby yet?
Joey: (to Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe) Did you hear that? I only get one extra ticket to my premiere. So some how I have to pick between you three and Ross.
Chandler: Hes not snoozing, hes teaching a class.
Chandler: I havent seen this dress.
Joey: Well uh I think I want to take Chandler.
Chandler: You really want to take me?
Joey: Yeah! Yeah! I mean Im sorry, I wish I can take everybody, but yknow Chandler always supported my career. Hes paid for acting classes and head shots and stuff and well this will be my way of paying you back.
Chandler: So youre never actually going to pay me back?
Chandler: I always knew you were gonna make it. Im so proud of you.
Chandler: (in a manly voice) Yeah well, Im gonna go spit. (He goes into the bedroom. On his way out, Joey gives Rachel a wide berth.)
[Scene: The World Premiere of Over There, Joey and Chandler are arriving in a limo and are about to walk down the red carpet.]
Chandler: This is so exciting! Its so glamorous! People taking our picture. How do I look?
Chandler: What?
Joey: Do you mind crouching down a little bit, so that I look taller? (Chandler does so) There you go. (And they walk down the red carpet.)
Chandler: Its just so glamorous.
Joey: (To Chandler) Okay, this is it. Its my big fight scene coming up. (He looks over and Chandler and notices that hes asleep.)
[Scene: Joeys Premiere, the movie is ending and it takes the applause to wake up Chandler.]
Chandler: Good job Joe! Well done! Top notch!
Chandler: Oh-ho-ho, yeah!
Chandler: The whole thing! Can we go?
Chandler: I love the specifics, the specifics were the best part!
Chandler: I was surprised to see a kangaroo in a World War I epic.
Chandler: Dont go! Im sorry. Im so sorry! (Sees another guy who is still asleep.) Look! This guy fell asleep! He fell asleep too! Be mad at him! (Looks at him more closely.) Or, call an ambulance.
Monica: All right, lets be practical, if Ross isnt willing to do it, hes not the only guy in the world you can have sex with. You can borrow ChandlerChandler is good!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler is there as Joey enters.]
Chandler: Where have you been?! I tried to call you! I want to talk to you! I still feel so bad!
Chandler: Im so sorry.
Chandler: What?!
Chandler: You dont owe me anything, I dont want you money
Chandler: I dont know, five hundred dollars?
Chandler: Well then there was the second set, the infamous booger head shots.
Chandler: Do you want a calculator?
Chandler: Here! (Hands him one. Joey adds it up and discovers that he was right.)
Chandler: Well uh, there was acting classes, stage combat classes, tap classes
Chandler: Uh then there was that dialect coach who helped you with that play where you needed a southern accent. Which after twenty hours of lessons still came out Jamaican.
Chandler: Yes, money well spent!
Chandler: Okay, two, three years of rent, utilities, food
Monica: How did you know that?! (Runs to yell at Joeys apartment.) Joey! Chandler!! Its time!
(Chandler lights a cigarette.)
Chandler: Hey, this is so unfair!
Chandler: Out of curiosity, what is your secret ingredient?
Chandler: And this- is my reward!
[Time lapse, they have set up a little assembly line for diaper changes. Phoebe wipes, Chandler adds the powder, begrudgingly, and Monica puts the diaper on.]
Rachel: (holding the phone out to Chandler) Chandler? It's Alan, he wants to speak to you.
Chandler: All right! I'm putting it out, I'm putting it out. (He drops it in Phoebe's coffee.)
Chandler: Joey ate my last stick of gum, so I killed him. Do you think that was wrong?
Chandler: (deadpan) Ooh, I'm alive with pleasure now.
Chandler: Yep, we sure showed those Hassidic jewellers a thing or two about softball..
Chandler: (sarcastic) Oh, she's sorry! I feel better!
Chandler: ...That's it. I'm getting cigarettes.
Chandler: (returns) Yeah, alright.
Ross: Yeah, see.. you took mine. Chandler, what about you?
Chandler: You got waaaay too much free time.
(Chandler and Joey enter. Joey is counting his steps.)
Chandler: Well, aren't we Mr. "The glass is half empty."
Chandler: Happy birthday, pal!
Chandler: (trying to stop Ross leaving) C'mon, Ross! You, me, Joey, ice, guys' night out, c'mon, whaddya say, big guy, (Pretending to punch him in the stomach.) Huh? Huh? Huh?
Chandler: You got it.
Chandler: (stops) I have no idea.
(Chandler leans over the back of the couch out of sight.)
Chandler: (looking) Oh, this is not that bad.
Chandler: Alright, now try taking a puff.
Chandler: Yes, Bunny?
Chandler: Forgive me? You haven't been taking my calls in a week!
Photographer: Why dont we have Monica step away and well get Chandler and the bridemaids.
Chandler: Sur-surprise him? We're not, we're not gonna make anybody mad are we?
Chandler: He's open!
Chandler: You're kidding.
(The player shoots and the puck flies off the rink and hits Ross in the face. Chandler looks concered until he notices...)
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Rachel are there talking about Chandler and Monica.]
Chandler: Hey, look, we're on that TV thing!
Receptionist: (on phone) Hold on. (To Chandler) Fill these out, sit over there. (Tosses him some forms.)
Chandler: And I just want a million dollars! (He extends his hand hopefully.)
[Scene: An Emergency Room, Chandler and Joey are leading Ross in.]
Chandler: Sometimes I wish I was a lesbian... (They all stare at him.) Did I say that out loud?
Chandler: Y'know, you'd think I would've.
Chandler: I mean presumably, the biggest part of your job is done.
Chandler: Then what?
Chandler: Well, what? What? What is it? That she left you? That she likes women? That she left you for another woman that likes women?
Chandler: So in your whole life, you've only been with one(He gets a look too)oh.
(Chandler and Joey hold the puck and wave at the TV thing.)
Chandler: Yknow those big-big uh, road signs that say "Merge?"
Chandler: I think it's great. Y'know, it's sweet, it's romantic...
Chandler: No, you kidding? The guy's a freak.. (Ross enters off camera)
Chandler: Typical Christmas-y stuff, you know? Our holidays are pretty traditional...
Chandler: You gotta do it, man.
Ross: (to the kid) Oh yeah? Well, I'm rubber, you're glue, whatever(to Chandler)can't do it. (to the kid) Listen, uh- gimme back my puck.
Chandler: Thanks. (The guy nods and leaves)
Chandler: Alright. (on phone) Yes, this is Rachel.
(The phone rings and Chandler answers it.)
Chandler: I dont see any uh, cabs. Maybe we should just walk?
Chandler: Not a one.
Chandler: Oh, right, right, shut up.
Chandler: We can? All right, I'm tryin' that.
Monica: Chandler, nobody likes breaking up with someone. You just gotta do it.
Chandler: Oh, yeah! Thanks for inventing the lottery!
Chandler: Ooh, I hate when my father calls me that.
Chandler: Oh, yeah. I'd marry him just for his David Hasselhof impression alone. You know I'm gonna be doing that at parties, right? (Does the impression)
Chandler: �Jeremiah was a bullfrog. Was a good friend of mine, never understood a single word he said, but I helped himdrink his wine.� So you just touch yourself for anything?
[Scene: Ross' apartment, Chandler is over.]
Chandler: There you go.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler has fallen asleep reading a book. Monica calls from the bedroom and wakes him up.]
Chandler: Where are they? Where are they?
Chandler: Here we go.
Chandler: Hey, Janice.
Chandler: Yes, the moon, the glow, the magical feeling, you did this part- Could I get some painkillers over here, please?
Chandler: (to the receptionist)'Scuse me.
Chandler: What?
Chandler: That's great.
Chandler: (covering) What... did you get me there?
Chandler: Well y'know, Monica and I were friends before we started dating. So maybe-maybe that's it?
Chandler: Well, I'm gonna get another espresso. Can I get you another latte?
Chandler: That's it?
Chandler: Yes, but I feel like Ive really gotten in touch with my feminine side enough today. You know. In fact I think were two sachets away from becoming a lesbian couple.
Chandler: Bullwinkle socks. That's so sweet.
Chandler: Yeah, but that's like two blocks away from the beach. I mean, it's a total party zoo.
Chandler: Actually, no. No, it felt right. You know, it felt like uhm... I can't believe we haven't been doing this the whole time.
CHANDLER: Stay back, I've got kiwi. Run, Joey, Run!
Chandler: Oh come on, by age seven kids have already seen orgies. (They both look at him.) Was it just me?!
(Chandler walks back to couch, where Janice is.)
Chandler: Janice. Hi, Janice. Ok, here we go. I don't think we should go out anymore. Janice.
Chandler: All of a sudden, the phone starts to ring. Now I don't know what to do, everybody starts looking at me.
Chandler: Yeah, I'm cool. Casual.
Chandler: I'm fine.
Chandler: (to Phoebe) I hit her in the eye! I hit her in the eye! This is the worst break-up in the history of the world.
Chandler: Oh, my god, I'm so sorry. Are you ok?
Chandler: Oh, I don't know, a million?
Chandler: How do you do that?
Chandler: I'm not fine. Here she comes.
Chandler: We should always always break up together.
Joey: Chandler, I can't be playing games, Ross is gonna be home soon. And I have to write five whole pages if I'm gonna stick to his schedule.
Chandler: Im sorry man, theres never a good time to (pauses) stop catching on fire.
Chandler: I'm free! I'm free!
Rachel: Where's Chandler?
Chandler: ...He's in.
(Chandler runs by the window outside, joyous.)
Chandler: (arm-in-arm with Monica) Hey Pheebs!
Chandler: No, ten o'clock.