words in movies
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's apartment. Ross is playing with Emma on the couch after just changing her diaper.]
Ross: And that's why, no matter what mommy says, we really were on a break. (baby talk) Yes we were! Yes we were! (picks Emma up) Come here gorgeous. (puts her on his knees and talks to her) Oh! Look at you! You are the cutest little baby ever! You're just a... a little bitty baby, you know that? But you've got... (in a softer voice) You've got big beautiful eyes... Yes you do... and a... and a big round belly. (emphasises the B's) Big baby butt! I like big butts. (raps) I like big butts and I cannot lie / you other brothers can't deny / when a girl walks in with an itty, bitty, waist / and a round thing in your face you get...(Emma laughs) Oh my God, Emma... you're laughing! Oh my God, you've never done that before, have you? You never done that before... Daddy made you laugh, huh? Well, daddy and Sir Mix Alot... What? What? You... you wanna hear some more? Uhm...(raps) My anaconda don't want none / unless you got buns hon... (Emma laughs again and Ross looks worried) I'm a terrible father!
Ross: Guess what? I made Emma laugh today.
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's apartment. Emma is sitting in her chair on the apothecary table and Rachel is trying to make her laugh.]
Rachel: Okay... aahhh... Please laugh for mommy... Please? Please laugh for mommy... (Rachel makes a funny face, sticking her tongue out, making a farting noise and using her hands as antlers, wiggling her fingers... No response from Emma...) Not funny huh? Oh so, is it... only offensive novelty rap? Or maybe just, you know, rap in general? 'Cause mommy can rap... (Rachel tries to rap and makes weird movements with her arms in the process.) My name is mommy and I'm here to say / that all the babies are... Oh, I can't rap... Allright sweetheart... This is only because I love you so much, and I know that you're not gonna tell anybody... (Rachel's face is telling "Oh what am I doing? The things I have to go through... and she starts to rap) I like... big butts and I cannot lie... / You other brothers can't deny... / when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist and a round thing in your face... (Emma starts to laugh) Yes! Yes! Yes! YES! Oohhhhh! Oh! (Rachel now really gets into it, and her insecure movements start getting better) I like big butts and I cannot lie... / You other brothers can't deny... Oh Emma you're laughing! Oh you are, you really do like big butts, don't you. Oh you beautiful little weirdo... (Rachel picks up Emma and Ross now enters)
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's. Emma is in her bed and Ross and Rachel are rapping and dancing for her.]
Monica to Emma: Hey you.
Monica to Amy: So. Welcome. Is this your first time you're seeing Emma?
Amy with confused look on face: Yeah I.. I think so. <sticks her hand out to shake hands with Phoebe and says to her> It's nice to meet you Emma.
Ross: Emma.
Amy turns around to Phoebe: Emma, Ross wants you.
Chandler: I can't believe you'd want us to raise Emma.
Monica: Okay. Its Emma.
Monica: Its clearly an Emma.
Rachel: (gasps) Emma! (Looks at the baby and starts to cry.) See? I dont want it.
[Scene: Outside the Nursery, Ross is looking at Emma as Phoebe walks up.]
Ross: Yeah. Shes putting her down now, thats her. (Points to the nurse putting Emma now.)
Ross: Look at Emma!
Ross: Uh Dad, Emmas in the nursery. Ill take you now. If you want, but (To Rachel) I really want to talk to you.
Ross: (noticing something) Actually umm (He turns Mr. Gellers head to look at Emma.)
(Theres a knock on the door and a nurse enters carrying Emma.)
Rachel: Yeah! Hi Emma. Hey, why do you think she wont take my breast?
(Theres a knock on the door and the Nurse enters carrying Emma.)
Rachel: (enters with Emma) Hi!
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Phoebe, Monica, Ross, and Rachel are watching Emma sleep.]
(Emma continues crying in the background)
(Emma starts crying)
Rachel: Ok. (Starts swinging Emma rapidly and she stops crying)
Chandler: (hears Emma crying) What is wrong with Emma?
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Emma continues to cry.]
Rachel: Here you go. (Hands Emma to Phoebe)
Monica: Okay Ill take her, here. (Takes Emma)
Monica: (stands up to hand Emma back) Oh no no no no!
Rachel: I mean I got news for you mister, Emma? Not easy.
Ross: Was there anything you did wrong with Emma?
Rachel: Oh, great! Well, then I'm gonna take Emma to see him. I wonder why Ross said that he died.
Rachel: Hi, my name is Rachel Green, I have an appointment for Emma.
Rachel: We've got to find a new pediatrician. Ross was getting sick last night, and I think Emma may have caught it.
(Ross and Rachel enter with Emma.)
Chandler: So if Monica's not around, then I'm not good enough to raise Emma?
Chandler: Well, bye Mon, bye Ross, Rachel, bye Emma!
Monica: Yeah, but I love you more. Besides yknow, nothing goes with Bing. So Im screwed. I mean (Rachel hands Emma to Monica.) Oh, hi Emma. Yeah, thats you. Youre our little Em. Oh whats that honey? What? Oh, you want a little cousin? (To Chandler) You want a cousin right now?!
Ross: I know, it�s the first time, we�re leaving the baby and � hey, I know how hard it is for you, but � but Emma is gonna be fine. My mom is gonna be with her. She�s great with kids.
[Scene: Central Perk. All except Chandler, plus Emma.]
Ross: Yeah and we'd want to make sure Emma has someone like Monica who is more uh. uh discliplinarin.. someone who can be firm and strict.
Rachel: Okay, well that�s now the third sign that I should not leave Emma.
[Scene: Ross and Rachel�s. Ross phones, Rachel and Emma are there.]
Chandler: Ok. So if we both had Emma and I die <knocks on table> she'd have to give her up.
Rachel: N-no, Emma dropped her sock.
Phoebe: And that�s Judy over there at the bar with Emma?
Ross: Rach, c�mon, Emma is fine. You�re turning into an obsessive mother. Okay, you need to stop.
Chandler: So.. let me get this straight. So my two friends die, I get Emma. Then my wife dies, then Emma the one tiny ray of hope left in my life gets taken away from me?
Rachel: Oh thank god, if Phoebe�s going, can we please take Emma home?
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's apartment. Rachel and Sandy sit on the couch. Sandy holds Emma. Ross enters the apartment. Sandy and Rachel wipe their tears away with handkerchiefs]
Monica: Ross and Rachel don't know what they're talking about. I mean its not like their so responsible. Emma is a product of a bottle of Merlot and a five year old condom.
Ross: Yeah, kids say all kinds of crap. (In the other room Emma starts to cry.)
Chandler: No, if crazy plate lad.. <sees Monica frustrated at this comment> If Monica dies then I would get Emma, Right?
Ross: Dude. Well done. You know what? If I die, and Rachel dies and Monica dies then you can totally take care of Emma.
Ross: Yeah, uhm... I mean, Rachel and I, think you are great... with Emma... uhm... We just feel...
RACHEL: Oh well, well thank you.� (She laughs.� He stares for a moment.)� Okay, stop.� Stop looking at me like that.� The last time that happened, (points to Ross) that happened.� (points to Emma.)
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's apartment.� Ross is in the living room covering Emma.� Rachel enters wearing a sexy dress.]
Ross: Emma.
<they hug and Rachel has this disgusted look on her face and then Emma starts crying>
RACHEL: (to Ross) Ok.� So now, I think Emma is probably down for the night, but if you need anything Ross . . .
(Ross and Rachel enter with Emma in Rachel's hands)
RACHEL: Aaah.� (She goes to tend Emma.)
RACHEL: (still looking at Emma) Yeah?
(Emma starts to cry)
Molly: No, you stay, I'll do it (takes Emma from Rachel).
Molly: Sure, I'll go check on Emma.
[Scene: Coffee place, Molly holding Emma and talking to Joey]
Chandler: Oh no no no.. I'll get her. I'm super-compentent and totally responsibile and fourth in line to raise Emma. I'll be right there Emma. Just let me get my trusty diaper bag here. <knocks over the box of china> Well.. what do you know? I guess, I'll be the one who dies first.
Molly: Hello! I just go and get Emma.
Ross: well.. its just. its just in that case, then um. Emma would go to my parents.
Rachel: Pheebs, I would make a reservation for five, because one of us has to stay home and watch Emma. (to Ross:) Which one of us should go to dinner?
Molly: No I'm here to take Emma to your mother's, remember?
Michelle: Ah, who is Emma?
Rachel: Hi, and I am also Emma�s mother.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Emma is there in her playpen, while Chandler is behind the couch.]
Michelle: Emma.
Ross: Bye! Hey, I hope Emma isn't making it too hard on you.
Rachel: Hi. Can Emma and I live here for a while?
Rachel: I was just asking 'cause I need someone to watch Emma tonight.
Joey: Emma? Hey! Hi!
Monica: Oh my god, Emma. Oh, sweetie, I forgot you were here. Oh, you're right, we can't do this. We can't leave her alone.
Chandler: Because of Emma.
Chandler: Emma was doing it!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. They're done and come out of their bedroom. Emma is still gone.]
(He walks out quickly with Emma in his arms.)
Monica: Oh my god, where's Emma? Where's Emma?
Chandler: Where's Emma?
Monica: Oh, thank god! Emma, there you are!
(Emma starts making noises, and Joey walks over to her playpen.)
(Joey and Chandler enter with Emma.)
Joey: Alright!! Fine! It's original Hugsy! No, now I know that Emma wants him but he's mine and I need him..
Rachel: All right... Oh, Emma loves him!
Joey: Well, I heard Emma stirring, so I came to make sure she could reach Hugsy.
Joey: No, no, Emma has one Hugsy, the new Hugsy, huh? The other Hugsy, I don't know, I guess I'll just take it back.
Rachel: I'm trying to put Emma down for a nap, have you seen Hugsy?
Joey: Ok, wait wait wait wait a minute wait a minute, I mean Rach, I mean if if... . If Hugsy means that much to Emma then... well she can have him.
Ross: Oh oh, we think Emma is about to start talking so we're trying to be careful about what words we use in front of her.
[Scene: Rachel's room. Rachel and Emma are sleeping; Joey sneaks in and approaches the crib]
Rachel: (she goes towards the others and she's very excited) Guys, you're not gonna believe this! I was just saying goodnight to Emma and she said her first words!!
Rachel: Ok... "Emma just said gleba"!
Mr. Geller: So when do I get to meet Emma and show her this? (Pulls a bouquet of flowers out of his sleeve.)
Joey: (sounding panicky)Oh my god Ross! You don't have Emma! And Rachel you don't have Emma! (Starts yelling) Where's Emma? Who has Emma!?