words in movies
MNCA: And for our two-week anniversary, he's gonna take me to his cousin's cabin for the weekend.
JOEY: Yeah, my agent just called me with an audition for Days of Our Lives!
[Russ enters Central Perk. He looks like Ross, except for his chin and hair (it is David Schwimmer in a dual role).]
JOEY: Well, I think it went pretty well. I.. I got a callback for Thursday.
ESTL: Oh, I see. Well, I'm just gonna put in a call here and we'll find out what's goin' on and straighten it out. [picks up the phone] Yeah, hi, Lori please. [pause] Hi darling. So how 'bout Joey Tribbiani for the part of the cab driver, isn't he terrific? [pause] Uh-huuuuh. [pause] Uh-huuuuh. OK, doll. Talk to you later. [hangs up] [to Joey] Yeah, you're gonna have to sleep with her.
MNCA: Oh, he's sober alright. Just turns out that Fun Bobby was fun for a reason.
MNCA: But I'm gonna be there... for the rest of my life. I mean, I can't break up with him. I'm the one who made him quit drinking. He's dull because of me.
ROSS: Well, uh, for your information, there's a woman at the museum, who's curator of moths and other... uh... winged things... who's, uh, let it be known that she is drawn to me much like a... well, you know. But so far I've been keeping her at bay, but, uh, if this is the deal...
JOEY: Ten years I've been waiting for a break like this Chandler, ten years! I mean, Days of Our Lives. That's actually on television.
JOEY: I've never slept with someone for a part.
CHAN: Well is she... [reaches into the cookie jar for a cookie, takes his hand out, covered with pasta sauce]
ROSS: [to Russ] For your information, it's a card sharp, not a card shark.
MNCA: Bobby and I are going away for the weekend, remember?
MNCA: Oh no no, this is not for him, this is for me. That way he's still sober but I find his stories about shoelaces much more amusing.
FBOB: This is really hard for me to say.
MNCA: What these? [holding up liquor bottles] Oh, these are, um, for.. cuts and scrapes.
ROSS: Good for you.
Rachel: Ok-dokey, Joey, listen. This is gonna be bridesmaid central, all right? We're gonna have hair and make-up going on in the bathroom and oh, I had to move a couple of things in the fridge to make room for the corsages.
Rachel: Oh, that would be great! (Sandy leaves for Emma's room) I love him, I love him, I love him...
Joey: Oh Monica. (goes over and hugs her, then looks at the form and stops hugging her.) Wow, this guy's an astronaut. That would've been cool, (sees Monica) for like a day. (hugs her again).
Sandy: Oh, oh, I can do it for her, if you want...
Chandler: (entering, angry) Yo, paisan! Can I talk to you for a sec? (Pause) Your tailor is a very bad man!
Ross: What kind of job is that for a man? A nanny? I-It's like if a woman wanted to be...
[Scene: Chandler arrives home and Monica's got a video of Sharks ready for Chandler.]
Phoebe: (points to David) And you thanks for the face massage. Thank you.
Joey: Well, I'm sorry if I'm not a middle-aged black woman! (Starts for his room.) And I'm also sorry if sometimes I go to the wrong audition! Okay, look, if I have to pretend I don't know about you two, then you two are gonna have to pretend there's nothing to know about.
Sandy: Who's up for puppets?
Joey: Me! I'm up for puppets!
Monica: Absolutely! (He goes to kiss her, but she stops him and rubs his head and says...) Now get out of here you!! (Pete leaves) (to the gang) Okay, Im running out of places I can touch him! Look, is there something wrong with me? I mean why am I only attracted to guys where theres no future? Either theyre too old, or theyre too young, and then theres Pete whos-whos crazy about me, and whos absolutely perfect for me, and theres like zip going on! I mean, seriously, does it sound like somethings wrong with me?!
ROSS: I'm getting ready for the water skiing. [Mr. Greene opens the door which pulls Ross in] How are you doing?
Chandler: Nope... (Monica walks in) Hey... so I'm gonna... put the plates back. You know, I think you were right, I don't think we should use these plates again for a looong time.
Chandler: No, 'Slim Pickings', it's a barbecue restaurant. They're looking for a cook. Actually 'cook' may be a bit of a stretch. They're looking for someone to shovel mesquite.
CHANDLER: Joey just called.� He's got courtside Knicks tickets for him and me tomorrow night.
MONICA: Really?� But tomorrow night is the only night I get off from the restaurant.� If you go to the game, we won't have a night together for another week.
RACHEL: Oh well, well thank you.� (She laughs.� He stares for a moment.)� Okay, stop.� Stop looking at me like that.� The last time that happened, (points to Ross) that happened.� (points to Emma.)
RACHEL: Yeah, yeah.� Phoebe and I are going to have so much fun.� And thank you for watching the baby, by the way.
RACHEL: (to Ross) Ok.� So now, I think Emma is probably down for the night, but if you need anything Ross . . .
MONICA: Because. . .� one of them is for you.
Phoebe: (getting up) Oh, for god�s sake, Judy, pick up the sock! Pick up the sock! Pick up the sock! (everybody scared) I�m sorry, was that rude? Di-did my, my li-little outburst blunt (?) the hideousness (?) that is this evening? Look, I know, you all have a lot going on, but all I wanted to do was have dinner with my friends on my birthday. And you are all so late and you didn�t even have the courtesy to call. (her cellular rings) Well, it�s too late now.
CHANDLER: I'm just going to wait for a little while.
PHOEBE: Yeah. . . I'm sorry.� We weren't really looking for anything to happen with you guys.� I, I have a boyfriend.
RACHEL: (as Ross) "Yeah.� That works for me." (Clears throat twice more.)
RACHEL: Well, the point is, maybe I should just stop waiting around for moments with Ross, you know?� I should just . . . move on with my life.
ROSS: Okay.� Well, thanks, ah, thanks for the beer.
Ross: Married couples send out cards, families send out cards, people who have been dating for a couple of months do not send out cards! What-what is she crazy?!
Rachel: Well, youve been here for two months now and your boss is required to hand in a performance evaluation. But yknow, there is one thing that I have yet to evaluate. (She turns around and sweeps the stuff off of her desk and hops up onto it.)
Hooker: Uh, no. But I could pretend to strip, but thats gonna cost extra. Okay, heres the extras, handcuffs, spanking (Chandler grunts for her not to continue and Joey pulls him back into the kitchen.)
Ross: Oh, I'm sorry. Please apologise to Sandy and the Snufflebumps for me.
Monica: I can't believe you're not gonna be here for Christmas.
Phoebe: So here is a, a very special holiday song that I wrote for some very important people to me. (singing:)
Ross: I cant believe someone would do that for a grade.
Chandler: No not okay, you can't look for Monica's presents!
Rachel: Don't worry, we're just gonna search here for an hour, and then we're gonna go over to Joey's and search, OK?
Rachel: We are looking for our Christmas presents from Monica.
Phoebe: Ooh, who's it for?
Chandler: No, I have a great idea for a present for her.
Joey: Rach, these are for you.
Joey: And for Ross, Mr. Sweet-tooth.
Ross: Oh, nothin much. Just trying to figure out what Im gonna do for dinner.
Ross: No, Rachel got pulled over for speeding. She forgot her licence so now I have to bring it to her.
Others: (simultaneously) Merry Christmas! (except for Phoebe...)
Wendy: Besides, I can't leave until their Christmas party downstairs clears out; there are some *pissed off* insurance people looking for that ham.
Phoebe Sr: I mean, I know what Im talking about. I gave up two babies, and I only wish I had someone there that had given up babies, that could tell me how terrible it is to give up babies. I just think that, it would be something you will regret every single day for the rest of your life. So, how ever hard it is to give up this puppy, it would be like a million times harder to give up a child. (Phoebe is playing with the puppy again, and not listening) I really shouldnt have given you the puppy first.
Monica: Eh, you work for that.
Joey: Name? (Ross looks at him.) I know Ross but whats it short for? You know like, like Rossel or Rosstepher.
Chandler: Oh, she's at home, putting up decorations for Rachel's birthday party tonight.
Joey: You damn right I am, I've been waiting for a cookie for 7 minutes.
Gavin: For what?
Monica: Yeah. Hey, that was nice of you guys to back off and let Joey get the girl for once.
Joey: (Laughs) Of course we do! Mike is playing a game that we used to play in high school. Yeah, where we pretend we don't know each other. We played all kinds of games. (To Mike) Hey, remember the one where I punch you in the face for not being cool?!
Joey: Oh, man, why did have to go and say that for? Now that you told me I can't have it makes me want her even more!
Mike: Better think of a new name for him.
Phoebe: I don't know, I kinda like Bob for a girl.
Joey: For a walk.
Chandler: Hello? Oh hi, Doctor Connelly. (pause) No, she's not here but, you know, I can tell her. Should I be sitting down for this? (his smile fades as he hears the answer) Oh. (pause) Well, so what does that mean? (pause) Ok. Ok, thank you. Thanks. (hangs up)
Monica: Ready for your birthday lunch?
Monica: Oh, you're welcome for the party. I'm glad you're having a good time.
Monica: Wouldn't kick her out of bed. No more Vodka for me! (put her glass down)
Man: (to wife): Toby... Oh, for God's sake, I don't know what she's talking about! There's no Rachel! Don't give me that deep freeze.
Chandler: Yeah, I-I-I think so. (Pauses and thinks about it for a second) Yeah, I-I think so...
Joanna: (interrupting) Okay, but that would actually be a big step down for me.
Rachel: Hi. Thanks for the party, honey. Should I help you clean up?
Gavin: I do have feelings for you.
Rachel: Well Monica seems to think it's because you have feelings for me.
Rachel: yeah your both so slutty you don't even remember who you've slept with, you're made for each other.
Joey: Uh, yknow, starve a fever, go to a play for a cold.
Rachel: Oh, I mean shes gonna be at the wedding waiting for him and people will be whispering, "Oh that poor girl." Yknow? Then shell have to come back here and live all alone.
Woman: How much do I owe you for the muffin and the latte?
Rachel: Pheebs, I would make a reservation for five, because one of us has to stay home and watch Emma. (to Ross:) Which one of us should go to dinner?
Doug: Bing! Were all set for tonight, 8 oclock.
Rachel: Oh look, shes pulling away again! Do you think my nipples are too big for her mouth? (Joey gets embarrassed.) She looks scared. Doesnt she look scared?
Joey: All right, look, you got to help me out, ok? Look, I have the magic marker, I want you to fill in the skinny one soI don�t look stupid for my pictures.
Chandler: Okay, hear me out. Okay? You give the best bad massages. If anybody was looking for the best bad massage and they were thinking to themselves, "Who's the best of that?" They'd have to go to you.
Monica: Good? Didn�t you hear them...I was great! Thank you so much for making me do this. That�s is the best gift ever.
Rachel: Oh, hey! Hi, there you are, I�ve been looking for you everywhere!
Joey: Listen that�s a pretty girly hour we just spent, we should add some manly make up for it.
Ross: So, I got us some reservations for Sunday night, okay? How about, Ernies at 9 oclock?
Ross: When I happened to look through the window and I see you kissing a guy you know, for what? A week?
Michelle: What are you taking amoxicillin for?
Chandler: (stopping him from going any further) Before you say anything, have we got a story for you! Guess who we bumped into at dinner!
Rachel: Hi. Can Emma and I live here for a while?
Ross: Yeah, sure, why not? In fact, if you know anyone that would be good for me...
Phoebe: I don't know. They're so perfect for each other; it's crazy.
Phoebe: You know what? Maybe once they start dating, and they see what's out there, they'll realise how good they are for each other.
Joey (gives a thumbs up sign): Okay, okay. Wait till you hear who I got for Ross.
Joey: She even reads for pleasure!
Joey: Nah, just me. All alone. (all the food is served) Dinner for six for one, uh, you boys are about to see something really special.
[Scene: Delmonico's restaurant. Ross is waiting for his blind date to show up. A waiter walks past him.]
Cheryl: I'll be right back. Make yourself comfortable. (Ross attempts to clear a place for his coat and fold it small enough to fit. Then hit sits on the couch. Something falls on him from above and he brushes his neck off frantically.)
Phoebe: Did he go out for a cigarette?
PHOEBE: No, huh uh, I'm sorry, no. No, I'm not some like sloppy second, charity band. You know what, there are thousands of places in this city where people would be happy to pay to hear me play. (Out on the sidewalk, singing) When I play, I play for me, I don't need your charity. (Someone puts a coin in her guitar case) Thank you! La la la la la la la....
Rachel: (lifts for a toast) Okay, as everybody has ordered, I would like to start the celebration and make a toast � to Phoebe. She dropped her sock.
Chandler: (spinning around looking for him) I dont think you did a very thorough job!
[Scene: The desert outside of Las Vegas, Joey is arriving and we hear the song, Name. Y'know, (singing) I've been through the desert on a horse with no name! It felt good to be out of the rain. In the desert, you can't remember your name, 'cause there ain't no one for to give you no pain. La la la-la-la, la, la, la, la-la-la. You get the idea. Anyhoo, he pulls up and stops. As he gets out of the car, he spills a huge pill of fast food containers out of the foot well.]
JOEY: Absolutely.� You'd do it for me.� Not that you ever have to because I know how to keep my women satisfied.
Monica: Come on...I just need it for some rent and..and some other bills.
Monica, Chandler, Ross: Congratulations!/Good for you!/Great!