words in movies
Joey: Check it out, Giants-Cowboys. (He has a pocket TV)
Joey: (hides the TV, but he still has an earphone) Just a, uh... hearing disability.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross has just finished putting Ben to sleep, and is entering from Rachels room.]
Rachel: Oh, wait yes, but I cant eat too much. Paul is taking me out to dinner tonight, he said he has a big surprise planned.
Rachel: Oh my God, Phoebe, Pottery Barn has ripped off the design of our antique!
(Everyone screams and has a group hug.)
Monica: Because Chandler still has feelings for you!
Chandler: Well, it still has to go, right?
Rachel: Oh, yeah, sure. I mean, like in the case of this young woman, she has lost her clothes, so she rides naked on the horse, shes crying out, Where are they, where are they?
Rachel: Because, uhit has to.
(Joey runs off down the hall. Ross tries Monica and Rachel's apartment, but it is locked so he has to stand in the hall and pretend he wasn't listening. Chandler and his mom come out)
Chandler: Our guy has great hair.
Monica: I'm sure everything's fine. Has her water broke yet?
Ross: Okay Ben, Santa has to go. Say good-bye!
Chandler: Look, Monica has been working hard all day, she didn't wanna host this thing in the first place, we shouldn't go!
Phoebe: Well, one of you has to take the first step! And it should be you, because shes the one whos leaving. Its harder for her!
Rachel: (to the cowgirl) And you are so in style right now. Yknow, I work at Ralph Lauren and the whole fall line has got this like equestrian theme going on. I dont suppose you saw the cover of British Vogue, but
Monica: Oh my God, that place has the creamiest frosting! I use to hitchhike there when I was a kid.
(Chandler seeing that Joey has his eyes closed sneaks over and picks up the chicken. The chicken starts flapping it's wings in protest as Chandler holds the chicken inches from Joey's face. Joey stops yelling and upon opening his eyes sees the chicken, screams, and falls to the ground in horror.)
Ross: Look, I (He has trouble sitting in his chair.) Look, Im having a great time with you and I just dont want us to move to fast or put to much pressure on us. So, Im sorry I just dont think we should go away together yet. Its-its too soon.
[Scene: Phoebes apartment building, in desperation she has wrapped up the smoke detector in a blanket and is going to throw it into the trash chute.]
Rachel: (pause as she realizes her lame attempt to shift the blame has failed) I am so hot for you right now.
[Scene: Central Perk. Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel are there. Rachel has just finished reading the book.]
[Time lapse, Ross has been demoted to the back seat with Joey and Chandler. He's not too happy about it.]
(Hearing the screaming Chandler and Joey rush in. Joey has a pan, Chandler has a tea kettle.)
(They both notice that Kristen has left.)
(Ross smiles and holds up his hand for a high-five, but he has forgotten about his burnt hands. He gasps in pain as Joey grabs his hand.)
[Scene: Earls Office, Earl has his head in his hands as Phoebe enters.]
PHOEBE: Well I have a video, you have to pay attention. No this, this voice woman, she's so talented but, according to the producer people, they said she doesn't have like the right look or something, ya know. I mean, it's like, she's like one of those an imals at the pound who like nobody wants 'cause they're not pretty enough or you know. Like, like some old dog who's just kind of like stinky and. Huuuuh, oh my God, she's smelly cat. Oh, oh that song has so many levels.
(Joey turns and looks at quite possibly one of the ugliest pets that you can possibly buy on the planet. Rachel has bought herself a hairless cat. Yep, a hairless cat! Joey and Ross start to get sick.)
Joey: No, no, no! Its real! And it has been since 1998. (Rachel returns from the bathroom.) Hey Rach! Rach! Im up for a Soapie!
Joey: Ross has a boyfriend.
Rachel: She has got so much going on we-we have only two options. We have Friday
Steve: Tartlets. Tartlets. Tartlets. The word has lost all meaning. (he gets up and goes into the kitchen)
Joey: Come on! Look just-just telllet her know that you really want them to be there. Lets not forget, this is a woman that has sent you many lasagnas over the years.
(Betty waggles her fingers to say "Hi", but Phoebe feels her birthday has been ruined by her twin.)
Chandler: So, why is she leaving? Is it a school night and she has a lot of homework to do?
[Scene: Rachels birthday, a time lapse has occurred. Rachel is coming back into the living room carrying a notepad.]
Monica: 007 has a fancy car!
[Scene: Rosss apartment, Phoebe has moved in and has a massage client on her table shes set up in the living room. Ross enters and is shocked to see a naked man lying on the table.]
{Transcribers Note: She puts the key into the ignition, which is on the left side of the steering wheel. Does anyone know why that is? Its a tradition left over from Porsches racing history. The worlds greatest endurance race is the 24 Hours of LeMans. Which is in France and runs for 24 hours straight from noon on Saturday through the dark of night and finishes at noon on Sunday. In the 60s LeMans had a unique start where the drivers would actually start the race outside of the car and across the track. At the start of the race, the drivers would run across the track, get in the car, buckle up, start the car, and drive off. Porsche wanted to reduce the amount of time that took. Since all cars to that point had the ignition switches on the right side of the steering wheel, that required the drivers to use their right hand to grab the seat-belts, put the car in gear and start it. The drivers left hand did nothing. Porsche in order to save a few seconds in a 24-hour race; moved the ignition switches to the left side of the steering wheel so that the driver could start the car with his left hand while grabbing the seat-belts with his right hand. Thats why every Porsche car built since then has the ignition on the left side of the steering wheel.}
[Cut to the casino, a very drunk and doodled on Rachel is walking arm in arm with an equally drunk and doodled on Ross are walking through the casino and greeting people on their way through. Ross has some whiskers and his nose colored in, along with his name on his forehead.]
(Everyone screams and has a group hug.)
Joey: (shocked) Has it been that long?!
Chandler: Batman has the Batmobile!
Joey: (entering) Okay, I'm in my sweat pants. Bring on the food! (Sees that Chandler has a worried look on his face) What's the matter?
(To start this task, she lowers the top of her robe to reveal that she is naked from the waist up, well at least her back is, and starts to rub on the gunk. Chandler notices this, and has something start happening. Ill let you fill in the blank here.)
Monica: Oh wow! Okay. Dont scare me like that okay? I mean for a minute there I was like, "Oh my God! The worst has happened!"
Mr. Geller: (going downstairs) Rachel, ready or not, here comes your knight in shiningOh no. (Chip has shown up and the four are leaving.)
Ross: Hi! (To Mrs. Bing) Hi! (Mr. Bing starts rubbing his arm.) Hi. Has umm, anyone seen Chandler?
Chandler: See? (Does his laugh.) Here we go. (Starts walking her to their room, and has to pass in front of Mr. Geller whos sitting at the table and Mrs. Geller whos standing next to him.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, after the party. Everyone has left, except for the gang.]
(The camera zooms in on Rachel who has a very worried and frightened look on her face and she slowly takes a deep breath.)
French Phoebe: Gauze! Gauze! I need to get some gauze in here! Can I please get some gauze in here! (A shell explodes outside next to the tent and when the smoke clears, Phoebe still has her arm.) Whew! (Her arm falls off and starts pumping out blood.) This is getting ridiculous uh!
Monica: Wow. Yknow it is so weird. I mean, youre gonna tell this guy today and he has no idea whats gonna happen.
Rachel: (who has just entered) Ugh! No more crying! Please! I just dumped one cry baby, Ill dump you too!
Monica: Ross has never checked out of a room a minute before he had to.
Sandy: I really do understand how hard it's gotta be to leave your child with another person. I mean, it's leaving behind a piece of your heart... (Ross has got that bored/angry/skeptic look and Rachel is very emotional)
[Cut to Rosss second wedding reception, Joey has just told him the band is ready with Rachel looking on.]
Amy: Oh, I can’t, honey. I’m gonna go get my eyebrows shaped. (points at her eyebrows) I am not happy. (to Joey who has a pizza box in his hands) Oh... sure you wanna eat that?
Ross: Wh-haa-haa! Look what cha did! (Rachel has her hand over her mouth to keep from laughing.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Obsessive Monica has now opened more of the wedding gifts.]
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Chandler has replaced Rosita with his chair.]
Phoebe: Rachel has something that she wants to tell you and umm, I believe that this is your red sweater.
Phoebe: But look Chandler, right now, no one has a lower opinion of you than I do. But I totally believe you can do this.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Mr. Treeger has finished inspecting Monica and Chandlers apartment.]
[Scene: Airport, Ross has headphones on, and is listening to a 'How To Speak Chinese' tape. Occasionally, he makes an outburst in Chinese in accordance with the tape. He is getting on the jetway. The flight attendant is there.]
Monica: (entering from her bedroom) I gotta go to work. Has anybody seen my left boob?
A Waiter in Drag: (to Chandler and Monica) Has someone taken your order yet?
Chandler: Bob? Ooh, working here with us? Everyday? Yeah, I dont know if he has what it takes.
Rachel: Are you joking? Check out is not til noon and he has a good (checks her watch) eleven minutes left.
Chandler: Maybe, isnt she the woman who lives below you and has sex really loud?
Joey: Hey! Uh, this is just to give you an idea. Okay well, we can put screens here, (In front of the crib.) so that the baby has privacy, and-and-and maybe a mobile over the crib. And uhOh look! Heres a baby monitor (Holds it up), which until the baby comes we can use as walkie-talkies. Huh?
Joey: But Rachel has an apartment.
Chandler: Yknow who has a great video camera?
Phoebe: I dont believe you! That is brilliant! And Monica has no idea?
Chandler: I'd like to propose a toast. Little toast here, ding ding. I know this isn't the kind of Thanksgiving that all of you all planned, but for me, this has been really great, you know, I think because it didn't involve divorce or projectile vomiting. Anyway, I was just thinking, I mean, if you'd gone to Vail, and if you guys'd been with your family, if you didn't have syphilis and stuff, we wouldn't be all together, you know? So I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm very thankful that all of your Thanksgivings sucked.
Joey: After she gave me that big speech?! She goes and makes a date with a guy on the same night she has plans with me? I think shes trying to pull a fast one on Big Daddy!
(Joey notices Monica has gotten a pie.)
Phoebe: Oh I do! (She grabs her huge purse and starts rummaging through it and taking out various items in a futile search for the gum.) Oh, yknow what? No. (Pause) Wait a second. (She removes a bag filled with water that has a goldfish swimming in it.) I know its in here somewhere.
[Time lapse, Monica has joined in and is calling to get out of work.]
Rachel: Honey, why dont you sit down? Dina has something that she wants to tell you.
Phoebe: Sting has a son that goes there too!
[Scene: Rachels Office, Joey has brought Dina to meet with Rachel.]
Rachel: Really?! So this has happened to you?
Mike: All right, stop! You know, all Phoebe has done tonight is trying to get you to like her. And maybe that hasn't been clear all the time, but she did her best. And yeah... She's a little different than you are...
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Will has left and the rest of the gang is watching Joey finish the turkey.]
Rachel: has your girlfriend got the butt?
Chandler: Oh uh, as it turns out, we cant do it. Monica has to work.
[Scene: The Cooking Class, everyone has finished baking a batch of cookies and the teacher is going around tasting them.]
Ross: So do we!! So do we!! (Ross notices a couple has been staring at them.) Im sorry you had to see that.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachels, Monica has finally given up on her search to find what the light switch does and is now flicking it on and off aimlessly.]
Phoebe: (sitting down next to Ross) Yknow she has a face Ross!
Chandler: Well apparently Albert has no friends. He's very excited about the bachelor party though. I think actually the only reason he's getting married is so he can see a stripper.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, the bachelor party has ended and Monica is trying to explain herself to Chandler.]
Monica: Well umm, Alexandra has been
Phoebe: Oh, it has a name?
(The dog returns with a ball that looks exactly like the same one Joey has.)
Rachel: (startled) Ahh, hi! Hi! Melissa, whats up? Im just uh, about to umm, go out to the store to get some stuff to put in my backpack. Yknow, like dried fruit and granola and stuff. Whats up? (She has put on the backpack.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica has opened another wedding present as Chandler enters.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler has a box of keys and is trying them on the secret closet when someone enters.]
Chandler: There has got to be a way!