words in movies
CHANDLER: You know I think he will be surprised, 'till he realizes he's a monkey, and uh, you know, isn't capable of that emotion.
CHANDLER: Wait, wait, wait. [Opens the top of the dish soap he's holding]
ROSS: Well, I uh, I can't seem to find the monkey I donated last year. He's a capuchan, answers to the name Marcel.
MONICA: Ah, and I mean, he's going out with her? He can not persue this.
CHANDLER: Hey, just because this woman thinks she can actually see Joey through the magical box in her living room doesn't mean she's not a person. I mean, does she not deserve happiness, does she not deserve love? What're you lookin' at me for? He's the one who wants to boff the maniac.
WAITER: Oh my God! Someone, he's choking. Is anyone here a doctor?
JANITOR: Of course they're gonna say he's dead. They don't want the bad publicity. It's all a great big cover-up. Do you have any idea how high up this thing goes?
ROSS: That's right, he's not Drake, he's Hans Remore, Drake's evil twin.
JOEY: Yes, I'm afraid it is. You deserve much better than me Erica. You deserve to be with the real Drake, he's the one you fell in love with. Go to Salem, find him, he's the guy for you.
ROSS: Well, I tracked down Marcel and get this, he's healthy, he's happy, and he's right here in New York filming Outbreak II - The Virus Takes Manhattan.
TRAINER: Hey don't take it personal, he's under a lot of pressure, ya know, starring in a movie and all.
RACHEL: What, so you go over there, you tell him you think he's cute, what's the worst that could happen?
ROSS: Hey Joey I have to cancel racketball for tonight, that was Marcel's trainer. He's gonna let me have him for a couple of hours.
ROSS: Ahh, oh that's OK, I mean, he's probably got, you know, parties to go to and stuff. But, ya know, he's moved on. Hey, that, that's the way it goes right.
Rachel: I know, isn't he great? It's so nice to finally be in a fun relationship, y'know? There's nothing boring about him, and ah, I bet he's never set foot in a museum.
Monica: No, that's not it. It's just that when we were asking him all those questions before, I just... I just realized I don't care if he's the most perfect guy in the world... he's not you.
CHANDLER: Ah he's a, he's not a big fan of foosball.
CHANDLER: Yeah, he's lived here for years, I don't, I don't know what you're talking about man.
Mindy: I know. I know, and when he proposed to me, everyone said "Don't do it, he's just gonna do to you what he did to Rachel," and now I feel so stupid.
Ross: Listen, listen. Whoever you pick is gonna walk down the aisle with you! Now, I promise I won't say a word, but if you pick Chandler he's gonna be whispering stupid jokes in your ear the whole time!
RACHEL: No, that was his costume. See, he's actually an orthodontist, but he came as a regular dentist.
Chandler: (grabbing the phone) Of course he has this big huge dog! That uh, barks into the night. (Listens.) Well, who doesn't love dogs? (Thinks.) Ah, he's a tap dancer! (Listens.) Yes, some would say that is a lost art. (Thinks.) He's a pimp! (Listens.) There you go! Yes, he's a pimp. He's a big, tap dancing pimp! (Pause.) Hello?
Rachel: Well, my boss was at the same restaurant where I was having my interview and he heard everything. So later he calls me to his office and he tells me that he's gonna have to let me go, because I'm not a team player. And I said "Wait a minute! Yes I am." and I had to sit there for 45 minutes while he proved that that in fact... was true.
ROSS: Hey, Rach, you know what? I think, I think I know what'll make you feel better. How 'bout you make a list about me. RACHEL: Wha... forget it Ross, no, I am not gonna stand here and make a list of. . . ROSS: C'mon Rachel. RACHEL: OK, you're whiney, you are, you're obsessive, you are insecure, you're, you're gutless, you know, you don't ever, you don't just sort of seize the day, you know. You like me for what, a year, you didn't do anything about it. And, uh, oh, you wear too much of that gel in your hair. ROSS: See there, you uhh, alright, ya, you did what I said. RACHEL: Yeah, and you know what? You're right, I do feel better, thank you Ross. [she walks off and Ross puts his hand to his hair] [Scene: Back at Phoebe's. She is on the phone] PHOEBE: Yeah, um, in Albany, can I have the number of Frank Buffay. . . OK, um, in Ithica. . . alright, um, Saratoga. . . Oneonta. Alright, you know what, you shouldn't call youself information. [hangs up] [Phoebe's grandmother enters] GRANDMOTHER: Hey. PHOEBE: Hello grandma, if that is in fact your real name. GRANDMOTHER: C'mon now Phoe, don't still be mad at me. How's it going? PHOEBE: Well, not so good. Upstate's pretty big, he's pretty small, you do the math. GRANDMOTHER: Well, I think you're better off without him. Oh honey, I know he's your daddy but, but to me he's still the irresponsible creep who knocked up your mom and stole her Gremlin. PHOEBE: No I just, just wanted to know who he was, ya know. GRANDMOTHER: I know. OK, I wasn't completely honest with you when I told you that, uh, I didn't know exactly where he lived. PHOEBE: Whattaya mean? GRANDMOTHER: He lives at 74 Laurel Drive in Middletown. If you hit the Dairy Queen, you've gone too far. You can take my cab. PHOEBE: Wow. Thank you. GRANDMOTHER: Now, remember, nobody else drives that cab. PHOEBE: Uh-huh, got it. Ooh, I'm gonna see my dad. Wish me luck, Grandpa! [blows a kiss to a picture of Einstein]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's and Ross's, Chandler is entering and when he closes the door Joey pops his head out of the fort like before, but this time he's wearing a cowboy hat.]
[Time lapse: Ross looks likes he's been trying to fix his computer but just closes it as if giving up]
Mike: Keep in mind, he's never used this product before, you're gonna see how easy this is to do. (to Kevin) Go ahead. ('Kevin' starts using the product, it is a spout that you jab into a paper milk carton so that you don't have to rip it open.) This works with any milk carton.
MONICA: No, a doctor of meat. Of course he's a real doctor. And he's handsome, and he's sweet, and know you'd like him. [she puts her arm around Richard]
RACH: Why didn't he call? He's gonna stay with Julie, isn't he? He's gonna stay with her and she's going to be all, "Hi, I'm Julie, Ross picked me, and we're gonna to get married, have a lot of kids and dig up stuff together."
Joey: Hey, hey, hey, hey! I'm not gonna mess with Jack, he's a great man, he fought for our country.
Rachel: Well, he's coming from Jersey, he said he would get here as fast as he could!
PHOEBE: Um well I don't really. Just genetically. He's kinda my dad too.
Joey: He's got the body for it.
MNCA: But I'm gonna be there... for the rest of my life. I mean, I can't break up with him. I'm the one who made him quit drinking. He's dull because of me.
Joey: You should both know, that he's a dead man. Oh, Chandler? (Starts after Chandler.)
Phoebe: Oh no! He's not getting away that easy! (Phoebe and Joey run towards the bathroom and enter)
Joey: Ohh, you're upset because you think I chose Ross over you! No! I knew you could take care of yourself. Y'know, I mean Ross, he need help. He's not street like us!
Rachel: G.I. Joe? Do you really think he's gonna fall for that?
Rachel: God, I hope he doesn't show up. Of course he's not gonna show up, the guy hates me.
Ross: I know. I know. I mean, one day, he's this little thing, and before you know it, he's this little thing I can't get off my leg.
Ross: Dr. Gettleman? Yeah I know, I don't think that's a good idea. In fact, I think he's dead.
PHOE: Look, I, y'know, I don't mind taking it slow, I like him a lot, y'know he's really interesting and he's really sweet and why won't he give it up?
Ross: No, NO! (they're moving to the side of the bed, where they sit down) Look, I need to talk to Joey. I mean, you guys just broke up. Before anything more happens between us, I need to know he's okay with it.
Joey: It's not right what Emily wants you to do! She is totally-(The gang enters behind Joey and Phoebe pinches him again.)-Owww!! Stop pinching me! Look, now you guys said I only had to keep my mouth shut as long as Ross was happy, right? Well he just told me that he's not entirely happy.
Ross: What, so he was a little analytical. That's what he does, y'know? C'mon, he's not that bad.
Joey: (Shocked) Oh! Well that's it! He's the last one to go. I'm locking you guys in. (turns the bolts of the door, thereby locking it)
Monica: If you would stop thinking about Ross for one minute you would notice that there are great guys everywhere! I mean, look! Look, Gunther! (Gunther turns to listen in.) I mean, he's nice, he's cute.
All: Loved him! Yeah! He's great!
Monica: There's nothing to tell! He's just some guy I work with!
MONICA: (entering) Richard buzzed. He's waiting downstairs.
Monica: My brother's going through that right now, he's such a mess. How did you get through it?
Chandler: He's open!
Rachel: I think he's across the hall.
Rachel: (to Ross, who has wandered up) God, he's good.
Monica: I know, he's just so, so... Do you remember you and Tony DeMarco?
Monica: I think he's shy.
Ross: (from his apartment) Man! They cannot get enough! (Makes like he's a robot and waves at the cutouts.)
Phoebe: No. (Monica brushes Coma Guy's hair in the other direction) No! No! ...So, um, do you think he's doing any better than he was this morning?
Chandler: ...He's in.
Monica: And say what? "You owe me a goodbye", I mean, he's got more pride than that.
Joey: No, but he's...
Aurora: He's... new.
Tom: Oh, actually I barely knew him. Yeah, I came because I heard Chandler's news. D'you know if he's seeing anyone?
(Joey enters and he's on the phone.)
Monica: He's in the bathroom. I don't think you wanna go in there!
Chandler: He's a he?
Rachel: Yeah? Okay! Good, good, because he's coming. He's coming. (To Chandler) Hey, what's up? (She leaves and closes the door behind her.)
Ross: Marcel. Bring me the rice, c'mon. Bring me the rice, c'mon. Good boy. Good boy. C'mere, gimme the rice. (Marcel brings the rice) Thank you, good boy. Well, I see he's finally mastered the difference between 'bring me the' and 'pee in the'. (Rachel ignores him) 'Bring me the' and- Rach?
Joey: He's planning your birthday party.
Shelley: What? He's cute!
Monica: He's not great umm, but he's dealing with it. Oh wait a minute, you're not gonna try
Steve: Yeah, he's the handy man. He's gonna be retiring next week and everyone who lives here is kicking in a 100 bucks as a thank you for all the hard work type of thing.
ROSS: Yeah, yeah, just a tough day at work. A stegosaurus fell over and trapped a kid. Whoa, whoa, I know this jacket, this is, th--Fun Bobby's jacket! Where is he, what. He, he's here, isn't he?
Ross: Okay, look, he's not gonna hurt them, right?
Mrs. Bing: He's not a hero. ...You know who our hero is.
Joey: All right, I have one question. What is the deal with this? (Imitates Ross's 'quiet down' maneuver, but does move his hands up and down he just flaps his hands as if he's waving good-bye.)
Monica: Ross! He's playing with my spatulas again!
[Scene: The Wake, at the Gellers' house. Ross is lying on his back, with Phoebe squatting over him, checking to see if he's injured.]
Monica: He's coming. Be cool, be cool, be cool.
Ross: No. It's the one he's licking.
Rachel: I don't know...right, he's the pig!
Phoebe: Oh he's like a...
Rachel: Oh, God, he's such a pig,
Ronni: Wow. He's strict.
Ross: Oh, it's-it's Marcel. He keeps shutting me out, y'know? He's walking around all the time dragging his hands...
[Scene: Chandler's hotel room, he's sitting there with Joey who's talking about his helmet and running his hand through that feathery thing at the top.]
Chandler: Basically we just feel that he's...
Steve: Well then you can't have any. (she grabs for the package, and it breaks open. Gummi-bears fly everywhere, some into the punch bowl on the table.) Bear overboard! I think he's drowning. (he throws some Sugar-O's into the punch bowl) Hey fellows! Grab on a Sugar-O... save yourself! (Mimicking the bears) "Help! I'm drowning! Help!"
Phoebe: David's like, y'know, Scientist Guy. He's very methodical.
Dr. Baldhara: Well, if he's up against a jungle cat or an animal with horns, you've got to give the little guy something. Otherwise it's just cruel.
Phoebe: Well, Vince is great, y'know `cause, he's like a guy, guy. Y'know? He's so burly, he's sooo very burly. (giggles)
Phoebe: Come, sit. (He's hesitant.) Sit. (Still hesitating.) Sit! (He sits on the arm of the couch.) Umm, all righty, before we get started I justI need you to state for the official record that you are in fact Frank Buffay.
[Scene: Chandler's office, he's on the phone, agitated.]
Mrs. Tribbiani: Do you remember how your father used to be? Always yelling, always yelling nothing made him happy, nothing made him happy, not that wood shop, not those stupid little ships in the bottle, nothing. Now he's happy! I mean, it's nice, he has a hobby.
Celia: I can't stand this! He's got his claws in my...
Angela: Bob is great. He's smart, he's sophisticated, and he has a real job. You, you go on three auditions a month and you call yourself an actor, but Bob...
Ross: (covering with his hand Chandler's face, like pretending he's not there) (to Monica) There're these two professors who are joining my department and I have to meet them here and show them around campus.
(He does the ancient trick of going downstairs while behind the couch. As soon as he's out of sight, Emma starts crying.)
Rachel: (looking at picture) Hey he's wearing a sweater.
Monica: Okay, he's a senior in college.
Shelley: Okay. He's cute, he's funny, he's-
Steve: I'm not funny either. So, if you were thinking, "well, he's not that good-looking, but maybe we'll have some laughs"... That ain't gonna happen.
Monica: He's a dropper!
Monica: Ross, he's got the remote again.
Monica: Level 1 alert. I repeat, level 1. This is not a drill. Okay we've got a situation. The minister just called. He's snowed in. He can't make it.
ROSS: I don't know.� But, you know, we, we have a lot in common, you know.� He plays piano; I played keyboards in college.� He's been divorced; I have some experience in that area.
Phoebe: Uh-huh. Okay. Okay, don't you think, maybe, though, it's just that he's so perceptive that it freaks you out?
Roger: You're so funny! He's really funny! I wouldn't wanna be there when when the laughter stops.
Chandler: And he's not speaking metaphorically.
Monica: I don't know. Look he's a great guy and I love being with him but... you know. Things happen, and they happen. You don't plan these things.
Monica: Oh, look, he's waking up!
Phoebe: Yeah, I know, he's sweet, but it's just not fun anymore, you know? I don't know if it's me, or his hunger strike, or, I don't know.
Ross: No-no, he's, he's very docile.
Phoebe: (with a deep voice) Mr. Bing's office. (Listens) No I'm sorry, he's in a meeting right now.