words in movies
JOEY: Nice, nice. Hey I got somethin' for you. [hands Chandler an envelope.
CHANDLER: Well, I don't know what Big Leon told ya but it's an even thousand if you want me for the whole night. What is this for?
JOEY: Well, I'm makin money now and this is payin' you back for head shots, electric bills, and so many slices of pizza I can't even count. I love ya man.
CHANDLER: Well, thanks man. Now I can get my pony.
CHANDLER: Wow, I don't know what to say. [opens the box and pulls out an incredibly gaudy gold bracelet] Wow, I, I don't know what to say.
CHANDLER: I don't know. It's a bracelet.
CHANDLER: Oh, now? [puts it in his desk drawer] No, no, I think something this nice should be saved for a special occasion. [sets a chair in front of the drawer]
CHANDLER: I so am.
CHANDLER: Well, it'll probably slow it down at first but, once I get used to the extra weight, I'll be back on track.
INTERVIEWER: And if I want to call for a reference on your last job?
MONICA: A salad? Really I, I could do something a little more complicated if you like.
INTERVIEWER: Now, I want you to tell me what you're doing while you're doing it.
INTERVIEWER: Don't, I like it dirty.
MONICA: Well, I thought that I would cut up the tomatos.
MONICA: Actually, I was gonna do them jullienne.
ROSS: Y-ello. No, Rachel's not here right now, can I take a message? Alright, and how do we spell Casey, is it like at the bat or and the Sunshine Band? OK, bye-bye. Hey, who's this uh, this Casey?
ROSS: [puts the message in the cupboard] I don't know, I don't get, I don't get it, I mean, wh, wh, two months ago Rachel and I were like, this close. Right now, what, I'm takin messages from guys she, she meets at the movies? I mean this, this Casey should be takin' down my messages, ya know, or, or, Rachel and I should be together and, and we should get some kind of me, message service.
MONICA: Yeah, I think that fifth shower actually got the interview off me.
MONICA: Oh yeah, well there's the possibility that I won't make rent.
ROSS: Monica, if you want, I can lend you some money.
MONICA: No no no, if I couldn't pay you back right away then I'd feel guilty and tense every time I saw you.
MR. GELLER: Well, I can't say any of us were surprised. Your parents have been unhappy ever since we've known them. Especially after that incident in Hawaii.
MR. GELLER: Uhh, naa, no no no, I, I must be thinking of someone else, uh, maybe me. Don't you have some folding to do? Go fold dear. Fold. You fold. [shuffles her into her room]
PHOEBE: OK. Ooh, OK, you gotta give me a second, I wanna get this just right. [she sticks out her gut, clears her throat and sniffs her nose and then in her best male voice. . .] Dude, 11 o'clock, totally hot babe checkin' you out. That was really good, I think I'm ready for my penis now.
CHANDLER: [walks over to the woman] I know what you're thinking, Dave Thomas, founder of Wendy's.
GAIL: I, I really have to be somewhere but it was nice meeting you.
CHANDLER: I pity the fool who puts on my jewelry, I do, I do. I pity the fool that. . . [turns around and sees Joey] Hi. Hey man, we were just doin' some uhh, impressions over here. Do your Marcel Marceau. [Joey turns around and walks out without saying anything] That's actually good.
ROSS: Would you look at that guy, I mean how long has he been talking to her. It's like, back off buddy she's a waitress not a geisha.
PHOEBE: I think she's OK.
ROSS: Oh, oh my God, is this the wrong day? I don't believe it, uh, well, hey, I guess if it works out we'll, we'll have something to tell the grandkids.
ROSS: I was saving you.
ROSS: Oh, see from where I was sitting I uh. . .
RACHEL: OK, Ross, listen to me, I am not yours to save.
RACHEL: No, listen to me. I fell for you and I get clobbered. You then fall for me and I again, somehow, get clobbered. I'm tired of being clobbered, ya know, it's, it's just not worth it.
CHANDLER: Well, doesn't the fact that I wore the bracelet even though I hated it say something about our friendship and how much it means to me?
CHANDLER: OK, well that's the part where I'm a wank. But I was hoping we wouldn't focus on that. [Joey goes to his room and shuts the door] Hey, c'mon man, I said I was sorry like a hundred times, I promise I will never take it off my. . . [notices the bracelet is missing from his wrist] wrist. But if, if you want to stay in there and be mad, you know, you just uh, you stay in there. [he starts searching the room, lifting up the couch cushions]
CHANDLER: I am here, on my knees, holding up these couch cushions as a symbol of my sorrow and regret, much like they did in biblical times. Though you may haveth anger now. . . [Joey returns to his room]
MONICA: No, but that's probably 'cause I haven't asked them yet.
MONICA: Um, yeah, so uh, uhh, listen, I'm sorry I didn't tell you this before but umm, I, I'm no longer at my job, I, I had to leave it.
CHANDLER: I can't believe it.
CHANDLER: Oh, you're right I, I should play in the hay. Forget about the fact that I just dropped 400 dollars to replace a bracelet that I hated to begin with. Bring on the hay. [sits down at the bar]
CHANDLER: What am I gonna do, huh? [Joey walks in behind him]
CHANDLER: No, I can't. No no, listen, I, I know how much this means to you and I also know that this is about more than just jewelry, [puts bracelet on Joey] it's about you and me and the fact that we're [reading bracelet] best buds.
JOEY: Wow, is this friendship? I think so. Check it out, we're bracelet buddies.
ROSS: Yeah, yeah I mean, you get your money and you learn a little something, what's wrong with that?
MONICA: Oh, um, that was my bathing suit from high school. I was uh, a little bigger then.
CHANDLER: Oh, I thought that's what they used to cover Connecticut when it rained.
MRS. GELLER: Over here Jack. OK. I see, Rachel's coming up the path. Oh doesn't she look pretty. Jack, get this. [Rachel enters with a huge nose]
CHANDLER: OK, I was wrong, that's what they used to cover Connecticut.
MONICA: Shoot, I think I got mayonaise on you.
RACHEL: [the shoulders of her dress keep falling off her shoulders] Is my hook unhooked? These things keep falling down, I can't. . .
ROSS: Uh, hold, let me see, I don't know. So what're you gonna do. . . [doorbell rings]
MONICA: I just told Rachel that Roy touched my boob.
RACHEL: I can't go to my own prom without a date, I can't, it's too late.
MONICA: If you're not going then I don't want to go either.
MRS. GELLER: [to Ross on the stairs] I have a wonderful idea. You should take Rachel to the prom.
ROSS: I don't know.
RACHEL: I can't believe I don't get to go to my own prom, this is so harsh.
ROSS: OK, you guys, ya know, I think we've seen enough, let's turn it off.
MRS. GELLER: Oh, dear. Jack, how do I turn this off?
MONICA: I can't believe you did that.
MR. GELLER: I may not know any of your flash dances but I'm no slouch on the dance floor.
Earl: No! Thats just the "Hey Guy" guy. He says that to everybody! Hes the worst! Id like to take him with me!
Rachel: Okay. 'Cause this is where I wanna be, okay? No more messing around. I don't wanna mess this up again.
Phoebe: No! Im not finished yet! Dont! Dont you dare hang up on me!!!
Ross: (on the phone) No-no-no, it's just a bit sudden. (Listens) No, it's great. Okay? I'm totally on board. I love you too, all righty. Bye. (Hangs up.)
Earl: Okay, I should, I should probably be getting back to my thing now. See ya. (Hangs up.)
Joey: In the dream I did enjoy the closeness.
Rachel: (stands up) Wow! Oh-okay, look pal, I am not in the mood to be hit on right now! But if you give me your number I will call you some other time.
Ross: What? No! No! I am not gonna hide it from PhoebeOoh, although I did get some great Pottery Barn sheets! (Gets them.)
Ross: Oh, I dont know how that got in there.
Phoebe: (muffled through the floor) Yeah, look I was with my friend downstairs and we hear everything up here that you do, and I am sick and tired... (I tired but the rest is unintelligible).
Mr. Geller: Im afraid so.
Ross: Okay, all right, Ill take you. Ill go call Joan. (Does so.)
Monica: (yelling at the top of her lungs) Im engaged!!!!!! Im engaged!!!!
Monica: I cant believe this! (Storms out.)
Mr. Geller: (To Ross) Screw it! Im having one. (Takes out and lights a cigarette.)
Tag: Okay! Feel free to look, but Im telling you those contracts are not on this desk.
MONICA: For the sixteenth time, no... I do not think you're obsessive.
Rachel: I don't know! I mean, we still care about each other. There's a history there. 'S'like you and Carol.
Rachel: Well, its a long story, but umm I broke Joeys chair
Rachel: (to the gang) Oh my God, Melissa Warburton. I dont think I have the energy for this.
Hums While He Pees: Me too! Im sorry that guy in the subway licked your neck.
Rachel: Ross, I am trying to help her become a better person. This is a huge breakthrough for her! She just offered to do something for another human being!!
Chandler: I think I should get the chair!
Chandler: So Joey breaks my chair and I get nothing!
Marge: Sorry, I dont know any Earl.
Earl: (screaming) Im right here!!!!
Phoebe: No-no I cant! I cant let you do it!
Phoebe: (goes over to his desk) Earl! Im Phoebe.
Phoebe: I can smell it a little, bake the pie.
Joey: Sure! I would love to wait with you guys! Thanks! (Sits down.)
Joey: But it is a big deal!! I have to tell someone!
Earl: Im actually the office manager.
Phoebe: Well, yknow Im wearing layers and its warm.
Ross: All right. I think it was a mouse.
Ross: Well, were all here! I guess we should get going!
Chandler: Hey, I had a terrible childhood and I dont do porn.
Joey: She made me switch to light Mayo. Thats it! Thats all I got! And, you know what? It tastes the same and my pants fit better!
Phoebe: No! I definitely don't wanna get married. No I just wanted to make sure you didn't want to too. Whew! Coz you know when we move in and you start changing your mind there's gonna be hell to pay mister!
Monica: Hey, I just whipped us up some Easy Bake treats, they should be ready in about three days.
Joey: I'm sorry! (He stands up) This never happened to me before! I'm an expert at taking off bras! I can do it with one hand! I can do it with my eyes closed! One time I just looked at one, and it popped open! I blame your bra!
Monica: Are you crazy?! We own those two! I mean look at 'um, he can't breath and she's popping pills.
Chandler: Are you kidding? Okay, Ill give you a hint; Ill give you a hint. (Points to his glasses.)
Rachel: Well, can I keep the presents and still be 29?
Joey: Ross good, I'm uh glad you're here. I wanna talk to you about something.
Chandler: Okay look, don't...don't be mad okay? But after I unpacked the boxes I wanted to do something nice for you, so, I-I-I cleaned the apartment. So I moved everything around and then I forgot where it, where it went back and I'm sorry, I'm very sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Rachel: Hi! I just want to apologize. Im really sorry I was a baby.
Ross: Look, I didn't recognize it without that inflatable sheep.
Earl: I thought it was toner.
Joey: No! No! No Pheebs, Im not gonna yell at you. I just yknow, started thinking about you and David and I remember how bummed you were the first time he left. And I just Oh Pheebs, come here. (He hugs her.) Are you okay?
Chandler: Well, I was trying to prove that I was right. Yknow? And it turns out I was wrong. And now its lodged in my throat. (Mimics a cat trying to cough up a hairball.) (He does it again.)
The Woman: Hi! Im sorry, I know its after hours but I really need candy.
Ross: How hot do I look in this, huh?!
Rachel: Nothing. I dont want to do anything.
CHANDLER: What if I never find someone? Or worse, what if I've found her, but I dumped her because she pronounced it "supposably"?
Monica: So I don't have to sing and I can just sit there and pass judgments on others?
Frank: Well y'know about the tongue thing, y'know, and how I told you about my likes and my dislikes...
Joey: How could this happen to me?! Yesterday I had two TV shows! Today, I got nothin!
Monica: I cant believe you bought this.
Monica: No! No-no! He is totally incompetent. I called the chef who recommended him to me. He said, "Ha-ha! Gotcha!"
Ross: (giddy) I dont know, but-but look how shiny!
Rachel: I mean he was possessive, he was jealous, he could never just let the little things go!
Tag: Look Rachel, I know what youre going through. Im totally freaked about turning 25.
Joey: Yeah, but uh, I dont want to be up too late, so uh, Ill have a decaf.
JOEY: Well, I had a whole ceramic zoo thing goin' over there but now, without the other ones, it just looks tacky.
Paul: Dont worry about it, I just didnt realize you were married. (Rachel returns and hears that.)
Chandler: I know, And then all of the sudden your Mom pops into your head. And your like 'Mom, get outta here!' You know, but of course, like, after that you can't possibly think of anything else, and you can't, you know, stop what your doing. So it's kinda like, you're, you know. You know...(Ross just stares at him). You don't know!
Chandler: (getting up to investigate) Okay, everybody stay here. I will find out whats going on.
Rachel: (entering) Hey! Everybody hide! Hide! I saw her! Shes coming!
Monica: Okay. I love you so much. (Kisses him.)
Chandler: Yeah, Ill take care of it.
Phoebe: Oh thats all right. Im still full from your homemade potato chips.
Monica: Okay. I can do that.
Ross: She wants me to take responsibility for everything that went wrong in our relationship. I mean she goes on for five pages about, about how I was unfaithful to her! (Both Joey and Chandler shrug their shoulders as to say Well...) (yelling) WE WERE ON A BREAK!!!!!
Chandler: (sounds nervous) Yeah! I... I... I liked it! (Joey continues to look at him suspiciously) But, ehm... my bosses didn't go for it. Stupid sons of bitches!
Ursula: Yeah, I got a big box of family stuff when my mom died.
Phoebe: No, I just feel like being by myself for a while. All right? Ill see you guys later. Thanks. (Gets up and exits.)
Phoebe: Well, I never knew mine. Do you remember what it is?
Phoebe: I just lost a whole year of my life.
Phoebe: No, Im just deciding which one to useIm gonna start writing another book!
Ross: Well yes, yes I have. In fact umm, just the other day Kristen and I were talking about how Ive been married and how I have a son.
Phoebe: Yay! I love drunk Monica!
Richard: Uh, no! No! Thats art! If it bothers you I can put my art out.
Ross: Look, I (He has trouble sitting in his chair.) Look, Im having a great time with you and I just dont want us to move to fast or put to much pressure on us. So, Im sorry I just dont think we should go away together yet. Its-its too soon.
Rachel: No! No-no, I love it. Thank you. (Kisses him.)
JOEY: Aww, Rach, I think you look cute (kisses her on the cheek, then looks at Ross) And you, uh, you, you I could eat with a spoon (goes to kiss him).
Rachel: Ooh... oooh... (pause) (Rachel is all bah-jiggity about Joey) oh, ah... (pause) (to Monica) Can I ask you a question?
Rachel: As I was saying I should probably have the first of the three kids by the time Im 35 which gives me five years. I love this plan! I wanna marry this plan!
Monica: I dont know! Time to kiss a guy maybe?! (Ross laughs.) What are you laughing at Pampers? (He stops laughing and glares at her.)
Phoebe: If you could do that, Id marry the hippity-hop.
Monica: Yeah, tacos! Ever since you told me that story Ive had such a craving for them.
Ross: I really wish that you wouldnt.
Joey: (to the waiter) Hey! Are those crab cakes? (The waiter nods) Did I not tell ya to come straight to me when more crab cakes were ready?
Ross: Hey Gunther, can I get a couple of blueberry muffins to go? (He puts a bag with diapers in it on the counter.)
Mrs. Geller: Oh-ho, I think its nice.
Ross: Okay, Im sorry, this is insane! I-I-Im not addicted to heroin, Im not gay, and there is no problem with my ability to consummate anything! Look, Ill consummate this marriage right here, right now!
Phoebe: I lost a whole year! I cant believe it! This is so unfair!
Joey: Oh, I dont know Pheebs. Itll be okay.
Phoebe: Will it? Will it?! I mean, how would you feel if you found out you were 31?
Monica: Yknow, lets face it, Im not a kid anymore! I-I need to be with someone who-who wants the same things that I do! I mean coming to my place of work and telling me that you love me, I want that! Talking about pig sex over lunch, I dont want that!
MNCA: Abso...[swallows hard]...lutely. See, I love creating new recipes. I love Thanksgiving. And, well, now, I love Mockolate.